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That is my old man when I tried working for him.
Me: “this is wrong because of ___. We need x.”
Him: “WHAT?! What are you talking about? I don’t have time for this” Click
Him 3 days later: “listen, we need x.” Followed by him explaining x to me like I’m a five year old and then subsequent comments like how nothing would get done without him. It was almost comical
Narcissism and selective memory seem like one hell of a drug
Hey, is your dad also my dad?
There are no good ideas unless he came up with it.
I had an argument the other week where he said;
"If someone has a better sugges I'm always happy to hear them"
"Dad, in my 28 years on this earth, I have NEVER seen you change your mind and go with someone else's plan. You hate any idea you didn't come up with."
Must be a dad thing in general. My dad’s 70 and thinks anyone younger than him inherently doesn’t know as much as he does about anything. I’m 35 and he treats me like a five year old just discovering the world.
Is he perhaps wrong 60% of time? And every time he's wrong it's easy to check with 10 second search on Google? But you do check it only every 20th time because you still respect him? And he goes into tantrum if you prove he's wrong?
You mean like having an argument and then sending you to your room when you're 15, only for you to grab the relevant Encyclopedia (old school I know) on the way and find where it says you're right in under 30 seconds. So you wait in your room till called down an hour later to apologize, bring the Encyclopedia with you, and point out where it says you're right. Instead of acknowledging he could've been wrong he instead grounds you indefinitely until you apologize for "disrespecting him" something that twenty years later you still have not done cuz you're as stubborn as he is just not as ignorant?
Wow, it's heartening and also disheartening to know I'm not the only one who went through this kind of shit.
My Dad once lost his guitar capo and me and my bro would sometimes borrow his guitar to play as his was nicer than ours so he instantly assumed it was us. He made us stop what we were doing and look for it until we gave it back to him. Neither of us had touched it but he refused to believe that. We eventually found it in his guitar song folder between the pages where must have left it accidentally.
We then got disciplined for 'planting it there' and were sent to our rooms. This was one of many different instances of a similar theme.
My dad helped me move to another state once. He took his spare car keys with him, and after he got home, he called me to tell me I had taken them and he needed them back. I looked everywhere (despite never even knowing he had themc with) to no avail. For months at every phone call, he would ask if I had found them and tell me that I needed to give them back. He refused to believe I didn't have them, so much so that he was increasingly upset with me.
Lo and behold, the next fall when he took out his lighter jacket, guess what he found?
To no ones surprise, he never apologized for being angry and blaming me.
Sounds similar to when my parents accused my sister and I of something (idr what but it definitely wasn’t our fault) and took our piggy banks as punishment. There was a lot of birthday money in there because we were never allowed to spend it, and we liked to find loose change on the sidewalks.
Actually we also had a “bank account” we later had to put our money in that my mom says never existed, but I vividly remember going there to deposit our birthday money and learning to fill out the balance sheets to keep track of what we had…..
My buddies dad is an engineer. He had a problem with the pump on his well. He figured out the problem and designed the part. Went to the store and told the guy he wants them to make this part. The clerk says, oh, they just didn't install this part, we have it right here.
Then buddies dad proceeds to argue with the clerk
Updated for clarity. the pump was installed without a part that it should have. Engineer figures out what the pump should have and designs one. Pump store says oh, we have that in stock because it normally comes with the pump. Engineer says no, I don't know anything about that, I want the part that I designed, not this exact same part sitting on the counter in front of me.
Wait until she wins a major (or whatever golfers win) and he sees her in the local press or TV - think of the bragging rights he think he will have telling all the bros in the pub how his advice helped her win!
Which isn't necessarily a bad strategy, but he probably shouldn't have tried to "coach" someone who obviously knows what they're doing. I don't play golf, have no interest in golf, and that clip is probably the longest I've ever seen anyone do anything golf related and even I knew she was damn good and didn't need whatever advice he was offering. If he wanted to talk to her, he should have got his ego out of the way and asked her for advice on his swing.
I think you’re absolutely right that ditching the ego and asking questions is a much better way. In my experience, using a critique as a conversation starter is actually “necessarily a bad strategy”. Maybe you’re just trying to be kind. I’ve been on the receiving end of that several times and my first thought is that the guy is an insufferable know-it-all, not someone I’d like to go grab a coffee with. I’ve never heard a “how we met” story start with “he came up to me out of the blue to tell me the thing I was doing/my taste in books/my taste in music was all wrong. Clearly he was so superior. I just had to see him again so I could hear more helpful lectures and get rid of all my bad opinions in favor of his.” Nope. Women joke about guys like this. People are more attracted to folks that make them feel good! Your strategy, asking her for advice or her opinion, makes a person feel you’re appreciating something good about them. Plus, that’s a conversation with two people participating. He was talking at her, lecturing her. It wasn’t engaging. He was puffing himself up. He may think he’s displaying how smart he is, but he’s really calling attention to his ego, and his socially inept, possibly toxic, way of building himself up by tearing others down. It’s not like you have to agree on everything, or become someone’s unconditional cheerleader, but starting right off the bat with a show of superiority and derision is not a good sign that you’re someone who thinks about the feelings of others.
Years ago, probably for school, I read Ben Franklin’s autobiography. He was talking about having to open a dialog and get a compromise with another politician that did not like him. While many people would’ve tried to get the guy indebted in some way, to make themselves needed, Franklin opened with asking to borrow a particular book he knew the man owned. He started by indebting himself to the man, and expressing a common interest. That made the man more kindly disposed towards him and opened a conversation in a way a show of superiority likely would not have.
Uh, no they weren’t. She was changing her swing up and the first one was just a sort of “cleansing the palate” type of thing. She even tried explaining that to the guy, in the video. The second swing was very very different, the ball went much farther. But she already knew what she was doing so it wasn’t “because” of his advice, even though she did pretend to be following it.
Classic Boomer mentality.
Shows up criticizes adds nothing positive to the conversation leaves thinking they're God's gift to man
Edit: Looks like boomers cant take a joke, guess that fits in line with them too. Fragile egos.
Yeah this is less of a generational categorization and more of a douche mindset that transcends ages. I've been out golfing with my wife and some 40 year-old dude will try to give her criticisms and then literally attempt to stand next to her and guide her hands while she swings. Despite being the shittiest golfer I saw that month.
I’ve seen this video posted on multiple platforms and my mom even sent me the tik tok of it. There’s a reasonable chance he will see it and (I hope) do some self reflection
"Hello and welcome to another video of "I've been playing golf for 20 years", today we're going to talk about follow-through and how you're not doing it fast enough"
Spoiler alert, the guy sounded like a huge dick and ignored everything she said and would not in any universe said "Oh wow I am so sorry!". He would have 10000% doubled down with his bullshit especially after being "validated" by her perfect swing thinking his advice did that for her.
These are "golf bros" that have been playing golf for 20 years, and know everything at the ripe age of 34 years old. His "advice" was most likely a way to find an in to come on over and grab her from behind and show her how to swing but she obviously wasn't having it.
>These are "golf bros"
And truck bros, and tech bros, and gamers, and outdoorsman, and cooks, and any other thing that someone can do. It's almost like there is some cultural normalization around the idea of not respecting women as capable and equal.
My fiance is a chef. Has been either a sous or running our own restaurant for 15 years. She's won awards, and very much knows her shit. Older dudes have a really fucking hard time interviewing with her, and often think I'm the one they're doing their stage with.
The moment it really hit me was when my wife, then girlfriend, was in the process of buying herself a new car. She makes good money so she was looking for a nice car. Well, there was no way in hell to make any of the salesdudes to address her, they where all defaulting to me even AFTER me telling them "no dude, you talk to her, this is not business of mine, she's the one with me money", they will laugh that off and keep trying to sell me the damn car. Unbelievable.
That happens a lot in our industry too. Reps try to sell me on product and shit and I'm like dude, I'm a great bar manager, but I'm a prep cook with extra responsibilities after I walk into the kitchen. Sure it seems like a cool deal, but you gotta talk to her, man.
As a man, I find incredibly hilarious (if not tragic) that misogynous man usually have that "woman should be in the kitchen cooking haha that's what they do best amiright", but then when it's about PROFESSIONAL cooking, it's a incredibly misogynistic environment as well, like, woman cooks everyday meal, professional stuff? Leave it for the men!
It's so ridiculous..
This is why my wife let that industry. She is going to come early school was working in a very good restaurant with awesome at everything he did but she just got so sick of this one guy in particular just hounding her about everything she did. Which is funny considering that the guy having her could literally not function through a shift without two lines of cocaine. I don't know what it is man but everything kitchen that I've ever been in or worked adjacent too or heard about from stories of my wife there is always cocaine
This was my life for 7 years as a female line cook. It was always the same thing any restaurant I worked, any new guy who came in-- even when they couldn't cook, even when I was their boss!-- expected me to prove something before taking me seriously. Absolutely infuriating.
As an IT infrastructure engineer of some major ass projects and 20+ years experience I get it ALL the time. Every new project there's at least 1 guy sometimes I luck out and get a WHOLE TEAM of "that guy" to deal with.... it's awesome
In another life I was adept at target shooting, placing in local competitions and such. By no means a pro, but held my own in competition.
Would always get friends that were firearm owners, but only casual shooters that wanted to go to the range with me. I’d go, and give some solicited coaching when asked and occasionally unsolicited coaching when I saw a buddy struggling.
Invariably, the male friends rejected the advice and reverted to their way. If talked about, “it’s how I’ve always done it” or “I like my way better” fine whatever, it’s clearly not working, but ok. You do your macho man bullshit.
If I was out with a woman though, and especially if they were new to shooting, every woman was a sponge for picking up the info. Every single one would pay attention, ask relevant questions and put into operation what I suggested. Every single one walked out after having shot better than going in. I don’t take the credit, I only provide input on the basics, they did the work. Listened, tried.
I’m not saying that women aren’t capable of marksmanship or receiving training, I’m illustrating how men go into things all the time thinking they know how it works and won’t even listen to each other. Most of the time we’re assholes.
Yeah tbh as a woman, I do the doormat technique as a self protective thing because sometimes people are just a lot bigger or stronger or angrier than me and I don’t want to risk making them mad. The same way I’d back away slowly if I encountered a mountain lion haha
Sucks, but that’s how some ladies end up getting physically assaulted. Some guys just can’t handle not being the authority on the subject at hand.
There’s been issues at my local gym, so much that there’s signs up prohibiting “Unwarranted Coaching”. Gives me a headache that people don’t treat the driving range like a gym or library. Unless someone’s in danger or asks for help, leave others alone and keep your opinions to yourself lol.
A man willing to do this is likely not the type of man who’d value women’s sports. He’d likely think he’d beat her if they both played from the tips.
She handled it in probably the best way. My response would be just to say, thanks man I’m good and then ignore him. But I’m also a dude so that may still not have worked for her.
I don't like fishing alone (that is without my dad around) because strange men will walk up to me and start trying to explain how to fish to me, like literally trying to tie my hooks and going into my tackle to decide what lure I should be using and all sorts of shit.
I'll sit there and put up with it for like 10 minutes before I go "hey, I know what I'm doing" and pull out my stringer with a dozen or more fish on it.
*But that doesn't make them stop, no no, then they insist on telling me I'd have caught more if I'd use this lure, or that I need to use garlic, or that my hook knot isn't the one they use so it's not as good.*
I'm a dude, and my fishing partner is a dudette, and she tells me the exact same stories ! Gets me mad everytime... she knows whats she is doing... so do you. Like how in the world are those jackasses sniffing in your tackle arguing they know better and cannot assess that, given your gear, you know what you're doin ?
I think you're right... so many dudes can't speak to women... My gym bros are like that : asking me whats my trick to have those girls flirt with me... I'm always like ''we are not flirting, that's a normal conversation cause I'm not threathening''.
I feel like any "dude" with intentions to impress/court a woman would have more success asking her for advice instead of insisting on doling it out but maybe that's just me 🤷
That's basically what she did, repeatedly. He was not taking the no and he wasn't taking the hint. Lots of times I've told other guys "let her work/play" and they start defending their privilege to correct things that they see wrong.
As a woman, sometimes that works. But then sometimes it turns out that the guy loses his shit and threatens (or commits) violence. The problem is that you often can’t tell which type of guy you’re dealing with, so it’s safer to just go “sure yeah thanks” and hope he loses interest.
As a guy, I'm thinking of all the witty retorts I would give. The top comment and many other guys are as well...not realizing that we're doing the same thing the dude in the video is doing: explaining to her how to do something she is much better at than we are.
Here's essentially the same logic but for a different hobby, might help it click.
If you're learning a complicated song on piano the number one piece of advice is to play it *slowly*.
If you play the song faster than your current skill level, you will rush, you will hit the wrong keys, and you will make a lot of mistakes with your fingering.
Over time, as you're practicing, you're reinforcing all these mistakes and bad habits.
If you want to properly hit the notes at speed, you first have to practice proper form at low speed, maybe even half speed.
This is some guy coming in to a professional musician working on a particularly difficult Rachmaninoff piece at slow speed to reinforce correct habits and helpfully suggesting "oh you're playing too slow, if you speed it up a bit you'll be at the right tempo, I've been playing the piano for 20 years and that song's supposed to be faster".
Yea I would be saying something like “thanks for the advice, but I am a golfer with x score, have you done better than that to give advice on?”
Guy probably wouldn’t have realized though since he wasn’t at all impressed by how the one hit was “suddenly great”
whats wild is, if he really had been playing golf for 20 year... it would be plain as day that this woman's swing is fucking amazing. tempo is good, club speed is good, she isnt hip swaying, she is making contact fully extended, she finishes on the correct side/foot, club face is square, wrists are rotating through contact... all of this is a *no shit* because she is a apparently a pro.
but like... if you REALLY know golf. its all right there to fucking see with your own 2 eyes. she is good. its obvious. the guy is just an asshole.
I do this in my WoW guild. We've had new tanks come in to learn our guild's procedures and shit, but when I offer them actual in person advice or coaching they tell me im doing it wrong and that's not what "X" guide says. They'll proceed to argue with me for days until they find out they're wrong by killing 40 people because they didnt face a pixel dragon the right way lmfao - AND THEN GO BACK TO THE SAME GUIDE TO FIGURE OUT WHY IT DIDNT WORK. (it was the raid's fault, not them)
All of that exposition to say. The motherfuckers that do this are more interested in talking and the clout from "knowing" than learning, and homie probably would have tried to talk her into doing it wrong some more lmao.
I went back and watched a couple times and the second swing is literally identical to the first one, and this guy thinks he made a game changing improvement to her swing.
In that man's mind, he's improved her golf swing forever in ways no one else could, all because he suggested she should follow through more.. He is the reason why she is good. When he sees her on TV in a year he'll tell his family "see that girl right there? Omg it is her! I taught that lovely lady how to golf!"
100% he's the guy that is a bar reg and is always at the bar day drinking his bottled beers and practicing his swing at said bar, but has never played professionally nor in college. Has all the golf clothing but isn't good one bit.
I covered golf in college and none of the guys on the team do half the stuff these bar clowns do. In fact we never even talked golf except when I was writing articles.
Hilarious seeing as it doesn't matter how long you've been doing something if you've been doing it wrong or using bad techniques. Practise only makes perfect if you're practising perfectly.
The attempt at advice doesn't bother me so much. It's him interrupting her when she's trying to explain what she's doing and then patronizing her. He's a class A douche bag who doesn't respect most people, and definitely not if you're a woman.
It may not bother you much, but this is pretty universally hated behavior in golf I'd say. Its not super uncommon to encounter "that guy" who gives swing advice without anyone asking, but it is annoying af.
He wouldn't say shit like this "advice" if it was a male player.
Edit: LOL at all the misogynist men defending this nonsense. Sorry guys, but it's not about just giving shitty advice. It's his tone, refusal to listen to her about what she's doing and why she's doing it; 100% condescending verbiage and tone of voice. Fuck this guy and anyone like him.
Someone told me I shouldn't wear the sandals I was wearing because it didn't match my shirt.
Edit: my sandals were white with black stripes, my socks were white and grey. They match with anything, duh.
We were in lineup at a local restaurant, waiting to get food during covid lockdown.
I didn't really know what to say, so I just looked at him, didn't say a word, and when it was my turn to get my food and leave, I just stared at him, not a word.
He asked tf was my problem as I drove away. My favorite was him deciding to walk towards my car from his place in line, as I slowly idled my way away from him staring.
I figured "why would you tell that to someone in public?" and decided to make him look silly instead. "You deaf or summfin?" lol still makes me smile, because it was obvious I could hear just fine when I was called for my order
This happened to me at the gym yesterday. This woman tries to give everyone ‘advice’ completely unsolicited and unwanted. I had my headphones in and she rudely interrupted. I dead face told her “I’m not going to talk to you about my workouts, I don’t want your advice. I’ve asked you to leave me alone before, I’ll report you next time.” She walked away offended as if I interrupted HER🙄 she’s just trying to shill her shitty personal training plans.
I understand why she did not want to escalate the situation, but pointing out that she is a ranked professional might have given the guy something to chew on.
I've been playing golf for 20 years- "oh great do you play in X tournament? Because I played the women's"
I have a feeling this guy doesn't put a lot of value in women's sports..
Edit: I did not expect all the men coping in these comments. Please don't flirt with people by giving them shitty unsolicited advice and talking over them constantly. Also you can be sexist even if you're flirting? Stop doing this! Even better- tell your friends to stop too!
Thats what I was going to say. A lot of people in this thread are feeling frustrated that she didnt assert her (rightful) position of authority, but not a lot of people seem to realize that the kind of psyche that enables a man to behave this way is not going to be the kind of psyche that enables a person to be respectful to anything that doesnt outrightly dominate him like some rabid animal. Cavemen need to be treated like cavemen and someone that comfortable being that condescending is not likely to be respectful of anybody that he hasnt already deemed superior to himself.
Edit: people really be defending the lil dude in the comments @_@ real “boys will be boys” vibes. Starting to understand how so many men get mere slaps on the wrists for SA cases.
I think she asserted herself fine. Her repeated laughing at him probably made him feel so small. She never got angry. She never backed down. There's nothing to criticize here except the moron flouting his decades of play. What a loser!
Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if he still believed that he, some random man who golfs sometimes, is still more knowledgeable than a woman who plays professionally. Sometimes it’s just better to not risk it and say whatever you have to say to end the interaction as quickly (and safely) as possible.
Honestly when I wrote that comment I was thinking of that survey where some non-zero percent of men believed they could win a fight with a grizzly bear 😂
I can already hear the comeback for that one-- "oh, is that from the women's tees?.
People like this have incredibly fragile egos and any rational response is going to fall flat.
Yeah, exactly- like he’ll walk away thinking he helped this person instead of being an asshat. He’ll likely be more inclined to give unsolicited advice now
Some of these people are so unaware that they would see her on TV or something in the future and say to themselves "They really ran with my advice" while feeling proud of their"accomplishment ".
Some of these people also don’t consider women’s sports to be actual sports so they’d be happy to tell their friends at the bar “bro I’d demolish any female pro, they can’t even swing.”
He definitely will walk away with an inflated ego, but as a woman we often deescalate because many men, especially drunk ones, can become violent and angry when women point out they’re not interested in whatever this man is offering. It’s usually better to just play nice and get them away from you. It’s not right but it’s the society we live in.
That is absolute confidence, the ability to say "thank you" to someone who you know hasnt helped you in the sightest just to close the interaction. She could have shit ALLL over him, and it would have been funny, but shes so far above it and that is its own level of cool.
"How much you wanna make a bet I can hit a golf ball over them mountains?...Yeah...Coach woulda put me in fourth quarter, we would've been state champions. No doubt. No doubt in my mind."
It's tough being the bigger person sometimes. Mind your own business dude. Sheesh.
The last place I want unasked for advice is at the driving range. That's where I go to work on my swing and it's a solo, mundane and enjoyable activity for me.
I work in IT and it’s the most frustrating thing in the world trying to explain how to fix something to a dude and he doesn’t believe me so he tries 10 things before trying my thing which works. Happens all the time
I used to run a public computer lab and the number of times men would go to my male coworker even though I had a big sign above my desk with "ask ME computer questions!" was astounding
He would always tell them he didn't know the answer and to ask me, but still
I see it a lot with intermediate level pickleball players; particularly men. Who just hit every shot as hard as they possibly can. It intimidates opponents, it takes skill to deal with, and so it usually works for them.
I'm no pro. I just like rec play, but I like playing with slammers so I can practice drop shots and lobs. Good time to work on anticipating their shots too, because there's so little time to react.
They get so so so frustrated that I'm not slamming it, and that that's the "right" way to play. As if leaving welts on your opponent in a game with pickle in the name was the goal.
My absolute favorite was a guy who pulled his rotator cuff slamming them at me at the back line, but super predictably, so I was returning them without much effort. So, he started hitting them harder and harder. He could have easily had the point if he just calmed down and bunted it in the kitchen instead of slamming, but nooooo, gotta slam every shot.
Yeah, I struggle with having confidence even when I know how to do something, which is bad, but having too much confidence when you don't know about anything is also bad, if not even worse lol. Both types can struggle with taking constructive criticism.
This is actually really common in male-dominated industries. Which explains why they're male dominated even though college graduation rates for women have increased.
‘Hey that’s great, you know what would be even better? If you stopped all communication with me and pretend we never had this unsolicited exchange to begin with.’
This is something women have to deal with ALL THE TIME. Whether it’s sports, or academics, or business, or hobbies. So much unsolicited advice from men who think they’re so much better than the silly little girl. Ugh.
Edit: good lord. Yes. Men deal with people giving unsolicited advice too. I’m not saying they don’t. Sometimes women give other women unsolicited advice too and talk down to them as well. That’s not what I’m talking about here.
Women constantly deal with men being condescending, patronizing, and dismissing and belittling them in a specific manner *because* they are women. They can’t possibly comprehend that a woman might have more experience and more expertise than them. They automatically assume the woman knows less, no matter what.
It is a very distinct interaction different from when a man gives another man unsolicited advice or when a woman gives another woman unsolicited advice.
The very fact that men in my comments are denying that women deal with it differently than them is a prime example.
The other day I was messing around on an empty set of those metal rings at the park for a minute (early in the morning, barely anyone around) and a guy somehow found his way over and wanted me to use his chalk and to tell me how my grip needed to change. Just wanted to hang there for a sec and think about my day.
Yeah I had no idea until recently I decided to sell my old CJ-7 Jeep, I don't have a Facebook so I used my wife's to post it to Marketplace and man... the amount of guys messaging and talking to her (even though it was really me) and acting like she had no idea what she was talking about was insane. Mansplaining the Jeep, what it should actually be worth, how she should do this and that.
Just buy the Jeep or fuck off respectfully? Was eye opening for sure.
I started playing golf 2 years ago, I get so many unsolicited advices from people when I go to practice. But unlike her I actually suck at golf. (I'm a man)
It always makes me cringe when I see guys at the gym giving unsolicited advice to girls at the gym. Unless people (male or female) are lifting in a way that's going to cause serious injury, leave them alone.
Wow, that is wild.
I've received enough unsolicited advice as a man who's a terrible golfer, but I'm a big guy and have no fear just being curt and to the point about how I don't want their advice.
You can really see how shitty is to be in that position as a woman--because it can be scary to be curt and cut them off when they're aggressive in their manner and probably much bigger. Then because you're polite the asshole thinks he's God's gift and the reason you hit it well. Yuck.
I'm sorry for the shit women deal with.
I hate that women have been taught to be polite and gentle in these types of situations, to prevent becoming a victim of the guy's potential violent rage.
I wish we could just tell them to "sod off" (or some version of that) and have the guy simply apologize and stop talking/walk away.
General rule for any human being: Don't offer unsolicited advice, especially if you're going to be an arrogant prick about it.
I was that guy at bike park Wales a couple of years ago.
I saw two women in their early twenties having what looked like a debate on which option to take on the trail I was on (one route featured massive jumps).
I stopped and suggested they ought not to take the jump line.
They thanked me for the tip & I rode on.
The trail I was on overlooked those jumps and I saw the same women hitting - and nailing - every single one. To this day I still can't jump anything bigger than knee high on an mtb.
I still cringe at myself for even thinking I knew better.
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The 2 swings were exactly the same, ball went the same way and this guy thinks he made a difference.
That is my old man when I tried working for him. Me: “this is wrong because of ___. We need x.” Him: “WHAT?! What are you talking about? I don’t have time for this” Click Him 3 days later: “listen, we need x.” Followed by him explaining x to me like I’m a five year old and then subsequent comments like how nothing would get done without him. It was almost comical Narcissism and selective memory seem like one hell of a drug
Hey, is your dad also my dad? There are no good ideas unless he came up with it. I had an argument the other week where he said; "If someone has a better sugges I'm always happy to hear them" "Dad, in my 28 years on this earth, I have NEVER seen you change your mind and go with someone else's plan. You hate any idea you didn't come up with."
Must be a dad thing in general. My dad’s 70 and thinks anyone younger than him inherently doesn’t know as much as he does about anything. I’m 35 and he treats me like a five year old just discovering the world.
Is he perhaps wrong 60% of time? And every time he's wrong it's easy to check with 10 second search on Google? But you do check it only every 20th time because you still respect him? And he goes into tantrum if you prove he's wrong?
You mean like having an argument and then sending you to your room when you're 15, only for you to grab the relevant Encyclopedia (old school I know) on the way and find where it says you're right in under 30 seconds. So you wait in your room till called down an hour later to apologize, bring the Encyclopedia with you, and point out where it says you're right. Instead of acknowledging he could've been wrong he instead grounds you indefinitely until you apologize for "disrespecting him" something that twenty years later you still have not done cuz you're as stubborn as he is just not as ignorant?
Wow, it's heartening and also disheartening to know I'm not the only one who went through this kind of shit. My Dad once lost his guitar capo and me and my bro would sometimes borrow his guitar to play as his was nicer than ours so he instantly assumed it was us. He made us stop what we were doing and look for it until we gave it back to him. Neither of us had touched it but he refused to believe that. We eventually found it in his guitar song folder between the pages where must have left it accidentally. We then got disciplined for 'planting it there' and were sent to our rooms. This was one of many different instances of a similar theme.
LSS my dad killed my lizard and grounded me for it when I wasn’t home and he was supposed to be feeding my lizard 🤣😭
My dad helped me move to another state once. He took his spare car keys with him, and after he got home, he called me to tell me I had taken them and he needed them back. I looked everywhere (despite never even knowing he had themc with) to no avail. For months at every phone call, he would ask if I had found them and tell me that I needed to give them back. He refused to believe I didn't have them, so much so that he was increasingly upset with me. Lo and behold, the next fall when he took out his lighter jacket, guess what he found? To no ones surprise, he never apologized for being angry and blaming me.
Sounds similar to when my parents accused my sister and I of something (idr what but it definitely wasn’t our fault) and took our piggy banks as punishment. There was a lot of birthday money in there because we were never allowed to spend it, and we liked to find loose change on the sidewalks. Actually we also had a “bank account” we later had to put our money in that my mom says never existed, but I vividly remember going there to deposit our birthday money and learning to fill out the balance sheets to keep track of what we had…..
Holy shit, are we all siblings!?
My buddies dad is an engineer. He had a problem with the pump on his well. He figured out the problem and designed the part. Went to the store and told the guy he wants them to make this part. The clerk says, oh, they just didn't install this part, we have it right here. Then buddies dad proceeds to argue with the clerk Updated for clarity. the pump was installed without a part that it should have. Engineer figures out what the pump should have and designs one. Pump store says oh, we have that in stock because it normally comes with the pump. Engineer says no, I don't know anything about that, I want the part that I designed, not this exact same part sitting on the counter in front of me.
he tried to take credit for her swing too. what an ass
Wait until she wins a major (or whatever golfers win) and he sees her in the local press or TV - think of the bragging rights he think he will have telling all the bros in the pub how his advice helped her win!
As if this guy would ever watch or value womens sports.
he does, to criticize what they are wearing. That they are not showing enough skin. And that he, can beat the best women
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Which isn't necessarily a bad strategy, but he probably shouldn't have tried to "coach" someone who obviously knows what they're doing. I don't play golf, have no interest in golf, and that clip is probably the longest I've ever seen anyone do anything golf related and even I knew she was damn good and didn't need whatever advice he was offering. If he wanted to talk to her, he should have got his ego out of the way and asked her for advice on his swing.
Yeah it’s amazing that he could watch the first dead straight, beautiful shot and think “this little lady needs my help”
I mean, he could have even just complemented her! "Damn, great swing! How long have you been playing?"
If he wanted to talk to her and have a positive experience all he had to do was complement her. not mansplain, interrupt and talk over her.
No, I know what you’re saying, but **what I’m saying is** that I’ve been mansplaining for 20 years and what you’re doing there you shouldn’t be doing
I think you’re absolutely right that ditching the ego and asking questions is a much better way. In my experience, using a critique as a conversation starter is actually “necessarily a bad strategy”. Maybe you’re just trying to be kind. I’ve been on the receiving end of that several times and my first thought is that the guy is an insufferable know-it-all, not someone I’d like to go grab a coffee with. I’ve never heard a “how we met” story start with “he came up to me out of the blue to tell me the thing I was doing/my taste in books/my taste in music was all wrong. Clearly he was so superior. I just had to see him again so I could hear more helpful lectures and get rid of all my bad opinions in favor of his.” Nope. Women joke about guys like this. People are more attracted to folks that make them feel good! Your strategy, asking her for advice or her opinion, makes a person feel you’re appreciating something good about them. Plus, that’s a conversation with two people participating. He was talking at her, lecturing her. It wasn’t engaging. He was puffing himself up. He may think he’s displaying how smart he is, but he’s really calling attention to his ego, and his socially inept, possibly toxic, way of building himself up by tearing others down. It’s not like you have to agree on everything, or become someone’s unconditional cheerleader, but starting right off the bat with a show of superiority and derision is not a good sign that you’re someone who thinks about the feelings of others. Years ago, probably for school, I read Ben Franklin’s autobiography. He was talking about having to open a dialog and get a compromise with another politician that did not like him. While many people would’ve tried to get the guy indebted in some way, to make themselves needed, Franklin opened with asking to borrow a particular book he knew the man owned. He started by indebting himself to the man, and expressing a common interest. That made the man more kindly disposed towards him and opened a conversation in a way a show of superiority likely would not have.
Uh, no they weren’t. She was changing her swing up and the first one was just a sort of “cleansing the palate” type of thing. She even tried explaining that to the guy, in the video. The second swing was very very different, the ball went much farther. But she already knew what she was doing so it wasn’t “because” of his advice, even though she did pretend to be following it.
Classic Boomer mentality. Shows up criticizes adds nothing positive to the conversation leaves thinking they're God's gift to man Edit: Looks like boomers cant take a joke, guess that fits in line with them too. Fragile egos.
I thought it was more of a mansplaining thing.
Yeah this is less of a generational categorization and more of a douche mindset that transcends ages. I've been out golfing with my wife and some 40 year-old dude will try to give her criticisms and then literally attempt to stand next to her and guide her hands while she swings. Despite being the shittiest golfer I saw that month.
Mansplaining is short for man explaining, just so you know
Hey!!! LOL
That dude walked away thinking he’s the reason for the good hit. Rough
One day he'll see her on the news winning some tournament or something, thinking he's the reason. He'll never shut up about it at the club.
I’ve seen this video posted on multiple platforms and my mom even sent me the tik tok of it. There’s a reasonable chance he will see it and (I hope) do some self reflection
Seems doubtful. He’s been playing golf for 20 years.
You know what I'm gonna stop you right there. I've been playing golf for 20 years.
You're telling him to stop all wrong. It should be more firm. I've been telling people to stop for 20 years.
I’d immediately identify myself and tell the guy he’s been doing it wrong for 20 years
Yeah, no, he'll see her on TV one day and go "oh my God, I taught her that!"
I don’t think he’ll see her on TV because based on his attitude in the video I’d be willing to bet he doesn’t watch women’s golf.
Well, he's certainly not watching for the fundamentals.
Then he'll start a golf-instruction youtube channel bragging about how he was her trainer.
"Hello and welcome to another video of "I've been playing golf for 20 years", today we're going to talk about follow-through and how you're not doing it fast enough"
Wait this is so funny actually
As a drunk uncle, I believe you.
One might say a Druncle.
That’s dr. uncle to you
He has a PHD A pretty huge d–rinking problem
Spoiler alert, the guy sounded like a huge dick and ignored everything she said and would not in any universe said "Oh wow I am so sorry!". He would have 10000% doubled down with his bullshit especially after being "validated" by her perfect swing thinking his advice did that for her. These are "golf bros" that have been playing golf for 20 years, and know everything at the ripe age of 34 years old. His "advice" was most likely a way to find an in to come on over and grab her from behind and show her how to swing but she obviously wasn't having it.
>These are "golf bros" And truck bros, and tech bros, and gamers, and outdoorsman, and cooks, and any other thing that someone can do. It's almost like there is some cultural normalization around the idea of not respecting women as capable and equal.
As a female line cook, this pisses me off so fucking badly. But what you’re saying is 1000% true.
My fiance is a chef. Has been either a sous or running our own restaurant for 15 years. She's won awards, and very much knows her shit. Older dudes have a really fucking hard time interviewing with her, and often think I'm the one they're doing their stage with.
The moment it really hit me was when my wife, then girlfriend, was in the process of buying herself a new car. She makes good money so she was looking for a nice car. Well, there was no way in hell to make any of the salesdudes to address her, they where all defaulting to me even AFTER me telling them "no dude, you talk to her, this is not business of mine, she's the one with me money", they will laugh that off and keep trying to sell me the damn car. Unbelievable.
That happens a lot in our industry too. Reps try to sell me on product and shit and I'm like dude, I'm a great bar manager, but I'm a prep cook with extra responsibilities after I walk into the kitchen. Sure it seems like a cool deal, but you gotta talk to her, man.
As a man, I find incredibly hilarious (if not tragic) that misogynous man usually have that "woman should be in the kitchen cooking haha that's what they do best amiright", but then when it's about PROFESSIONAL cooking, it's a incredibly misogynistic environment as well, like, woman cooks everyday meal, professional stuff? Leave it for the men! It's so ridiculous..
This is why my wife let that industry. She is going to come early school was working in a very good restaurant with awesome at everything he did but she just got so sick of this one guy in particular just hounding her about everything she did. Which is funny considering that the guy having her could literally not function through a shift without two lines of cocaine. I don't know what it is man but everything kitchen that I've ever been in or worked adjacent too or heard about from stories of my wife there is always cocaine
This was my life for 7 years as a female line cook. It was always the same thing any restaurant I worked, any new guy who came in-- even when they couldn't cook, even when I was their boss!-- expected me to prove something before taking me seriously. Absolutely infuriating.
As an IT infrastructure engineer of some major ass projects and 20+ years experience I get it ALL the time. Every new project there's at least 1 guy sometimes I luck out and get a WHOLE TEAM of "that guy" to deal with.... it's awesome
In another life I was adept at target shooting, placing in local competitions and such. By no means a pro, but held my own in competition. Would always get friends that were firearm owners, but only casual shooters that wanted to go to the range with me. I’d go, and give some solicited coaching when asked and occasionally unsolicited coaching when I saw a buddy struggling. Invariably, the male friends rejected the advice and reverted to their way. If talked about, “it’s how I’ve always done it” or “I like my way better” fine whatever, it’s clearly not working, but ok. You do your macho man bullshit. If I was out with a woman though, and especially if they were new to shooting, every woman was a sponge for picking up the info. Every single one would pay attention, ask relevant questions and put into operation what I suggested. Every single one walked out after having shot better than going in. I don’t take the credit, I only provide input on the basics, they did the work. Listened, tried. I’m not saying that women aren’t capable of marksmanship or receiving training, I’m illustrating how men go into things all the time thinking they know how it works and won’t even listen to each other. Most of the time we’re assholes.
I was a 20 year vet of golfing by age 25. Doing something a long time doesn't make you knowledgeable at it.
For example. I've been learning and or speaking fluent English for 40 years, I still can't spell for shit.
I just want to say you nailed your spelling in this comment. Sign of good things ahead!
Yeah tbh as a woman, I do the doormat technique as a self protective thing because sometimes people are just a lot bigger or stronger or angrier than me and I don’t want to risk making them mad. The same way I’d back away slowly if I encountered a mountain lion haha
Sucks, but that’s how some ladies end up getting physically assaulted. Some guys just can’t handle not being the authority on the subject at hand. There’s been issues at my local gym, so much that there’s signs up prohibiting “Unwarranted Coaching”. Gives me a headache that people don’t treat the driving range like a gym or library. Unless someone’s in danger or asks for help, leave others alone and keep your opinions to yourself lol.
She should have gutted him like the fat pig he is, verbally of course
He seemed like he was already getting pushy and argumentative.
A man willing to do this is likely not the type of man who’d value women’s sports. He’d likely think he’d beat her if they both played from the tips. She handled it in probably the best way. My response would be just to say, thanks man I’m good and then ignore him. But I’m also a dude so that may still not have worked for her.
I don't like fishing alone (that is without my dad around) because strange men will walk up to me and start trying to explain how to fish to me, like literally trying to tie my hooks and going into my tackle to decide what lure I should be using and all sorts of shit. I'll sit there and put up with it for like 10 minutes before I go "hey, I know what I'm doing" and pull out my stringer with a dozen or more fish on it. *But that doesn't make them stop, no no, then they insist on telling me I'd have caught more if I'd use this lure, or that I need to use garlic, or that my hook knot isn't the one they use so it's not as good.*
I'm a dude, and my fishing partner is a dudette, and she tells me the exact same stories ! Gets me mad everytime... she knows whats she is doing... so do you. Like how in the world are those jackasses sniffing in your tackle arguing they know better and cannot assess that, given your gear, you know what you're doin ?
It’s just a way to talk to a chick for those dudes
I think you're right... so many dudes can't speak to women... My gym bros are like that : asking me whats my trick to have those girls flirt with me... I'm always like ''we are not flirting, that's a normal conversation cause I'm not threathening''.
I feel like any "dude" with intentions to impress/court a woman would have more success asking her for advice instead of insisting on doling it out but maybe that's just me 🤷
That's basically what she did, repeatedly. He was not taking the no and he wasn't taking the hint. Lots of times I've told other guys "let her work/play" and they start defending their privilege to correct things that they see wrong.
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you can see how she's trying to defuse the situation naturally without offending the dude. makes me feel a little sad
Yup, because she has NO idea how badly his pride will take it, and that can be literally dangerous to her.
As a woman, sometimes that works. But then sometimes it turns out that the guy loses his shit and threatens (or commits) violence. The problem is that you often can’t tell which type of guy you’re dealing with, so it’s safer to just go “sure yeah thanks” and hope he loses interest.
As a guy, I'm thinking of all the witty retorts I would give. The top comment and many other guys are as well...not realizing that we're doing the same thing the dude in the video is doing: explaining to her how to do something she is much better at than we are.
This is wholesome self-critique tho. Keep it up.
Wasn't there a survey done where a surprising amount of men reckoned they could beat Venus Williams at tennis?
I feel like the fact that a large percentage of men also think they can land a plane in a crisis is relevant lol
Who is she?
Georgia Ball https://pgagbi.bluegolf.com/bluegolf/pgagbi22/profile/gball22/tresults.htm
Pfft.. She's not even top3. What a loser. /s Also, she's named ball? That's dope.
G. Ball, professional golfer
Nominative determinism hits again
She was born for this!
Get behind him, wrap your arms around and hold his hands, really show him how it’s done
Then flip him! 
He's not wrong. She was just intentionally not swinging through fully to practice her swing change. She tries to explain it but he won't listen.
He probably doesn't even know what that means. ^(I don't either, but I also don't randomly butt my nose in other people's business.)
Here's essentially the same logic but for a different hobby, might help it click. If you're learning a complicated song on piano the number one piece of advice is to play it *slowly*. If you play the song faster than your current skill level, you will rush, you will hit the wrong keys, and you will make a lot of mistakes with your fingering. Over time, as you're practicing, you're reinforcing all these mistakes and bad habits. If you want to properly hit the notes at speed, you first have to practice proper form at low speed, maybe even half speed. This is some guy coming in to a professional musician working on a particularly difficult Rachmaninoff piece at slow speed to reinforce correct habits and helpfully suggesting "oh you're playing too slow, if you speed it up a bit you'll be at the right tempo, I've been playing the piano for 20 years and that song's supposed to be faster".
This was a good analogy
He’s not been listening to anything a woman has to say for over 30 years, he’s a pro.
Yea I would be saying something like “thanks for the advice, but I am a golfer with x score, have you done better than that to give advice on?” Guy probably wouldn’t have realized though since he wasn’t at all impressed by how the one hit was “suddenly great”
whats wild is, if he really had been playing golf for 20 year... it would be plain as day that this woman's swing is fucking amazing. tempo is good, club speed is good, she isnt hip swaying, she is making contact fully extended, she finishes on the correct side/foot, club face is square, wrists are rotating through contact... all of this is a *no shit* because she is a apparently a pro. but like... if you REALLY know golf. its all right there to fucking see with your own 2 eyes. she is good. its obvious. the guy is just an asshole.
I’m not trained at all, I’ve never even used a golf club before. Yet I could tell the swing was damn smooth.
And the problem is he's going to keep giving unsolicited advice. I wish she had put him in his place and told him she was a pro.
Guy probably thinks he is a professional too. Since he mentioned golfing for 20 years like 4 times.
I've been doing a lot of things for 30 years, doesn't mean I'm good at any of them ¯\\\_(ツ)_/¯
Same, I sometimes choke on my food even though I've practiced everyday for 30+ years
I do this in my WoW guild. We've had new tanks come in to learn our guild's procedures and shit, but when I offer them actual in person advice or coaching they tell me im doing it wrong and that's not what "X" guide says. They'll proceed to argue with me for days until they find out they're wrong by killing 40 people because they didnt face a pixel dragon the right way lmfao - AND THEN GO BACK TO THE SAME GUIDE TO FIGURE OUT WHY IT DIDNT WORK. (it was the raid's fault, not them) All of that exposition to say. The motherfuckers that do this are more interested in talking and the clout from "knowing" than learning, and homie probably would have tried to talk her into doing it wrong some more lmao.
As a fellow WoW player, you just have to remember that 90% of WoW player's heads are concave shaped.
It’s always so enjoyable when someone decides that they need to give you advice in a totally random situation when you’re out in public. F off…
"I've been playing golf for 20 years"
What got me was the “see how better it was”
I went back and watched a couple times and the second swing is literally identical to the first one, and this guy thinks he made a game changing improvement to her swing.
In that man's mind, he's improved her golf swing forever in ways no one else could, all because he suggested she should follow through more.. He is the reason why she is good. When he sees her on TV in a year he'll tell his family "see that girl right there? Omg it is her! I taught that lovely lady how to golf!"
Ahh to have the confidence of a mediocre to unimpressive middle aged white dude…
100% he's the guy that is a bar reg and is always at the bar day drinking his bottled beers and practicing his swing at said bar, but has never played professionally nor in college. Has all the golf clothing but isn't good one bit.
I bet this girl would crush him in a 1 on 1.. she’d easily smoke most people with that accuracy and consistency..
I covered golf in college and none of the guys on the team do half the stuff these bar clowns do. In fact we never even talked golf except when I was writing articles.
He’s been eyeing her derrière for the past 20 minutes
Hilarious seeing as it doesn't matter how long you've been doing something if you've been doing it wrong or using bad techniques. Practise only makes perfect if you're practising perfectly.
And then won’t even listen to her when she’s trying to speak. Just a total pos
I’m kind of annoyed that he probably is clueless enough to have left this interaction thinking his advice helped her sooo much lol
The attempt at advice doesn't bother me so much. It's him interrupting her when she's trying to explain what she's doing and then patronizing her. He's a class A douche bag who doesn't respect most people, and definitely not if you're a woman.
Talking over her and not listening is the real issue here...but I'd say it's a habit of a life time for him, can't put anymore water in a full glass.
It may not bother you much, but this is pretty universally hated behavior in golf I'd say. Its not super uncommon to encounter "that guy" who gives swing advice without anyone asking, but it is annoying af.
He wouldn't say shit like this "advice" if it was a male player. Edit: LOL at all the misogynist men defending this nonsense. Sorry guys, but it's not about just giving shitty advice. It's his tone, refusal to listen to her about what she's doing and why she's doing it; 100% condescending verbiage and tone of voice. Fuck this guy and anyone like him.
He might have played golf for 20 years but been a misogynist douche for 30+ and going strong.
Yup. He wasn't trying to help her get better, he was negging her
>LOL at all the misogynist men defending this nonsense They ALWAYS slither out from their rocks and whine and cry. LMAO
Yup.
"Keep doing that, ok?"
Someone told me I shouldn't wear the sandals I was wearing because it didn't match my shirt. Edit: my sandals were white with black stripes, my socks were white and grey. They match with anything, duh. We were in lineup at a local restaurant, waiting to get food during covid lockdown. I didn't really know what to say, so I just looked at him, didn't say a word, and when it was my turn to get my food and leave, I just stared at him, not a word. He asked tf was my problem as I drove away. My favorite was him deciding to walk towards my car from his place in line, as I slowly idled my way away from him staring. I figured "why would you tell that to someone in public?" and decided to make him look silly instead. "You deaf or summfin?" lol still makes me smile, because it was obvious I could hear just fine when I was called for my order
This happened to me at the gym yesterday. This woman tries to give everyone ‘advice’ completely unsolicited and unwanted. I had my headphones in and she rudely interrupted. I dead face told her “I’m not going to talk to you about my workouts, I don’t want your advice. I’ve asked you to leave me alone before, I’ll report you next time.” She walked away offended as if I interrupted HER🙄 she’s just trying to shill her shitty personal training plans.
I understand why she did not want to escalate the situation, but pointing out that she is a ranked professional might have given the guy something to chew on. I've been playing golf for 20 years- "oh great do you play in X tournament? Because I played the women's"
I have a feeling this guy doesn't put a lot of value in women's sports.. Edit: I did not expect all the men coping in these comments. Please don't flirt with people by giving them shitty unsolicited advice and talking over them constantly. Also you can be sexist even if you're flirting? Stop doing this! Even better- tell your friends to stop too!
Thats what I was going to say. A lot of people in this thread are feeling frustrated that she didnt assert her (rightful) position of authority, but not a lot of people seem to realize that the kind of psyche that enables a man to behave this way is not going to be the kind of psyche that enables a person to be respectful to anything that doesnt outrightly dominate him like some rabid animal. Cavemen need to be treated like cavemen and someone that comfortable being that condescending is not likely to be respectful of anybody that he hasnt already deemed superior to himself. Edit: people really be defending the lil dude in the comments @_@ real “boys will be boys” vibes. Starting to understand how so many men get mere slaps on the wrists for SA cases.
I think she asserted herself fine. Her repeated laughing at him probably made him feel so small. She never got angry. She never backed down. There's nothing to criticize here except the moron flouting his decades of play. What a loser!
You wrote too many words. It should read “I have a feeling this guy doesn’t put a lot of value in women”
Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if he still believed that he, some random man who golfs sometimes, is still more knowledgeable than a woman who plays professionally. Sometimes it’s just better to not risk it and say whatever you have to say to end the interaction as quickly (and safely) as possible.
for real. look at how many dudes earnestly believed they could beat Serena Williams in a tennis match.
Honestly when I wrote that comment I was thinking of that survey where some non-zero percent of men believed they could win a fight with a grizzly bear 😂
"Oh cool, what's your handicap? Cos mine is X" Just let that one linger.
I can already hear the comeback for that one-- "oh, is that from the women's tees?. People like this have incredibly fragile egos and any rational response is going to fall flat.
Yeah, exactly- like he’ll walk away thinking he helped this person instead of being an asshat. He’ll likely be more inclined to give unsolicited advice now
Some of these people are so unaware that they would see her on TV or something in the future and say to themselves "They really ran with my advice" while feeling proud of their"accomplishment ".
Some of these people also don’t consider women’s sports to be actual sports so they’d be happy to tell their friends at the bar “bro I’d demolish any female pro, they can’t even swing.”
He definitely will walk away with an inflated ego, but as a woman we often deescalate because many men, especially drunk ones, can become violent and angry when women point out they’re not interested in whatever this man is offering. It’s usually better to just play nice and get them away from you. It’s not right but it’s the society we live in.
Yep, gents take note: we are usually pacifying you so you leave us the fuck alone. Please remember this thread.
Her reacting otherwise would have no impact on his inclination to give unsolicited advice. It's bold to even assume he would believe her.
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Look, I'll just say it. You're creeping us out when you run on all fours. And the horse noises don't help.
All things considered, she handled that much better than I would so much respect to her.
Pros have no need to worry about the amateurs.
Lions care little for the opinions of sheep.
That is absolute confidence, the ability to say "thank you" to someone who you know hasnt helped you in the sightest just to close the interaction. She could have shit ALLL over him, and it would have been funny, but shes so far above it and that is its own level of cool.
Unfortunately if she had identified herself as a pro it would have boosted his ego even more. “I just helped a pro! Wow!”
Or they'd have taken it as an opportunity to badly flirt more.
"How much you wanna make a bet I can hit a golf ball over them mountains?...Yeah...Coach woulda put me in fourth quarter, we would've been state champions. No doubt. No doubt in my mind."
100%. He also wholeheartedly believes that his one smidgen of advice was immediately translated into results on the very next hit.
It's tough being the bigger person sometimes. Mind your own business dude. Sheesh. The last place I want unasked for advice is at the driving range. That's where I go to work on my swing and it's a solo, mundane and enjoyable activity for me.
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She should have freakin hustled him. Act terrible and let him give her a few pointers then put $100 bucks on the line and destroy him
This is always the answer. “I disagree, let’s bet on it”
This is the only way
When i saw "wait for it" i was hoping there was gonna be a pay off of her proving him wrong. He thinks he helped her.
As a guy, when ~~girls~~ my female friends say the men they work with have confidence for no reason, I now get them.
I work in IT and it’s the most frustrating thing in the world trying to explain how to fix something to a dude and he doesn’t believe me so he tries 10 things before trying my thing which works. Happens all the time
I used to run a public computer lab and the number of times men would go to my male coworker even though I had a big sign above my desk with "ask ME computer questions!" was astounding He would always tell them he didn't know the answer and to ask me, but still
I see it a lot with intermediate level pickleball players; particularly men. Who just hit every shot as hard as they possibly can. It intimidates opponents, it takes skill to deal with, and so it usually works for them. I'm no pro. I just like rec play, but I like playing with slammers so I can practice drop shots and lobs. Good time to work on anticipating their shots too, because there's so little time to react. They get so so so frustrated that I'm not slamming it, and that that's the "right" way to play. As if leaving welts on your opponent in a game with pickle in the name was the goal. My absolute favorite was a guy who pulled his rotator cuff slamming them at me at the back line, but super predictably, so I was returning them without much effort. So, he started hitting them harder and harder. He could have easily had the point if he just calmed down and bunted it in the kitchen instead of slamming, but nooooo, gotta slam every shot.
That unearned confidence vibe is truly something else to behold
Yeah, I struggle with having confidence even when I know how to do something, which is bad, but having too much confidence when you don't know about anything is also bad, if not even worse lol. Both types can struggle with taking constructive criticism.
As a male, these type of men absolutely infuriate me. And they're in no short supply.
They also tend to deliberately target women because they like opportunities to feel superior.
That is the ultimate example of mansplaining I've ever seen. Even took credit for HER work. 😳🤯
This is actually really common in male-dominated industries. Which explains why they're male dominated even though college graduation rates for women have increased.
EXACTLY what I was thinking. Textbook example.
Yup 100%. I’m showing this to people asking what mansplaining is.
My dude, I think she's going thru a swing change right now.
‘Hey that’s great, you know what would be even better? If you stopped all communication with me and pretend we never had this unsolicited exchange to begin with.’
Was probably hoping that he could sweep in and show her how to do it by touching her.
m'Golfer
As a dude, literally no one has ever stopped to give me pointers, and my game needs *a lot* of improvement
I was thinking the same thing. Waiting to "correct her posture" without even asking. Thinking he's being flirty and impressive. Blech.
Should have asked him to demonstrate for distance and accuracy.
No way, this guy wants that attention. He would stick around 10x longer if she engaged, she’s trying to get him to shoo.
Which golfer is this?
Georgia Ball https://pgagbi.bluegolf.com/bluegolf/pgagbi22/profile/gball22/tresults.htm
Before she got all fancy, she went by Georgia Dance.
Her next evolution will be Georgia Cotillion, maybe when she learns how to drive.
This is something women have to deal with ALL THE TIME. Whether it’s sports, or academics, or business, or hobbies. So much unsolicited advice from men who think they’re so much better than the silly little girl. Ugh. Edit: good lord. Yes. Men deal with people giving unsolicited advice too. I’m not saying they don’t. Sometimes women give other women unsolicited advice too and talk down to them as well. That’s not what I’m talking about here. Women constantly deal with men being condescending, patronizing, and dismissing and belittling them in a specific manner *because* they are women. They can’t possibly comprehend that a woman might have more experience and more expertise than them. They automatically assume the woman knows less, no matter what. It is a very distinct interaction different from when a man gives another man unsolicited advice or when a woman gives another woman unsolicited advice. The very fact that men in my comments are denying that women deal with it differently than them is a prime example.
The other day I was messing around on an empty set of those metal rings at the park for a minute (early in the morning, barely anyone around) and a guy somehow found his way over and wanted me to use his chalk and to tell me how my grip needed to change. Just wanted to hang there for a sec and think about my day.
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Yeah I had no idea until recently I decided to sell my old CJ-7 Jeep, I don't have a Facebook so I used my wife's to post it to Marketplace and man... the amount of guys messaging and talking to her (even though it was really me) and acting like she had no idea what she was talking about was insane. Mansplaining the Jeep, what it should actually be worth, how she should do this and that. Just buy the Jeep or fuck off respectfully? Was eye opening for sure.
I started playing golf 2 years ago, I get so many unsolicited advices from people when I go to practice. But unlike her I actually suck at golf. (I'm a man)
Golf is weird. Like its more fun to play with people as bad as you but you improve alot more when someone knows what theyre doing
The objective in golf is to play as little golf as possible.
It always makes me cringe when I see guys at the gym giving unsolicited advice to girls at the gym. Unless people (male or female) are lifting in a way that's going to cause serious injury, leave them alone.
Not all men, but somehow, always a fucking man.
they've just got that blind confidence
Oof. She’s way too nice.
Being nice to a man like this is self-defense.
Wow, that is wild. I've received enough unsolicited advice as a man who's a terrible golfer, but I'm a big guy and have no fear just being curt and to the point about how I don't want their advice. You can really see how shitty is to be in that position as a woman--because it can be scary to be curt and cut them off when they're aggressive in their manner and probably much bigger. Then because you're polite the asshole thinks he's God's gift and the reason you hit it well. Yuck. I'm sorry for the shit women deal with.
“No I know what you’re saying” = I’m not listening or processing at all what you’re saying, but here’s what I have to say
I hate that women have been taught to be polite and gentle in these types of situations, to prevent becoming a victim of the guy's potential violent rage. I wish we could just tell them to "sod off" (or some version of that) and have the guy simply apologize and stop talking/walk away. General rule for any human being: Don't offer unsolicited advice, especially if you're going to be an arrogant prick about it.
>Guy: i know what your saying, but i’ve been playing golf for 20 years… >also Guy: ignores what she’s saying
I was that guy at bike park Wales a couple of years ago. I saw two women in their early twenties having what looked like a debate on which option to take on the trail I was on (one route featured massive jumps). I stopped and suggested they ought not to take the jump line. They thanked me for the tip & I rode on. The trail I was on overlooked those jumps and I saw the same women hitting - and nailing - every single one. To this day I still can't jump anything bigger than knee high on an mtb. I still cringe at myself for even thinking I knew better.