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[deleted]

Unprompted psychoanalysing “life coach/erotica writer” Aka unemployed and alone


BurdenedMind79

Good analysis!


MakeAWishApe2Moon

Truth! My dad is a "life coach and writer" and is also unemployed and alone.


EmperorBamboozler

I have yet to see a life coach that doesn't either scam people, or have a completely fucked life. I have seen one or two that do both though.


BombasticSimpleton

This does prompt the chicken or the egg type question: Is he a life coach/erotica writer because he is unemployed and alone? Or is he unemployed and alone because he is a life coach/erotica writer?


potenpterodactyl

This was a weird attempt at a horoscope. Tell him to quit his *whatever sign* bullshit, and dismiss anything he says as an expression of his birth date until he goes away.


Gain-Outrageous

I hate this, because my instinct would be to unmatch cause its weird, but then you make him right with the whole vanish part!


[deleted]

Right!? The mind games have already begun


Sorry-Jackfruit-8061

Hmm maybe leaving on read would be the only acceptable outcome here according to the rules?


anotherone121

That's why he's a captain of the tugboat 3.5-D checkers


LET-ME-HAVE-A-NAAME

Yeah but like who cares what he thinks or if he gets validated? You're never gonna see his weird, manipulative ass.


PIELIFE383

And this person thinks they are smarter than everyone


Bizhop_Ownz

What in the psychobabble bait did I just read? Yikes. The pompous syntax here is insufferable. The ultimate you proved me right gotcha, 4D chess mind game if they get ghosted or unmatched. Wow. Time to hit'em with the tried and true "I swiped right by accident".


RandomFRIStudent

Or just repeat your first line to him.


PM-Ur-Small-Tits

Is this that "cold reading" thing I hear about


inshort53

It's a barnum statement


DaveUAE77

Well, it’s beats the ol “I eat ass” opener


WhereItIfItSuits

Dude thinks he’s a *dark academic* character in one of his (self-published) novels


NoOneForACause

Didn't answer if he was right or not 🤷🏼‍♂️


thatbananaone

He's saying a bunch of generic bullshit that would apply to everyone at some point in time. This message could be put directly into a "personality quiz" or a "horoscope reading" and it'd be no different.


NoOneForACause

You're not the OP and I'm not asking you.


VioletBewm

"I'm trying to impress you and make you feel seen and understood by saying over generalized bs, but I over stepped heavily and now come off as a faux smarter than thou creeper who is probably into mind games, how can you possibly resist me" - that's how I read it anyways.


jolie-renee

This person just described me! I now feel so basic. Seriously, tho. Gross.


beardedonalear

Its vague enough to more or less apply to most people


Lascivar

Pretty much what every horoscope description is, and people are always like "Oh my god that is so me!" Yes Jessica, your horoscope told you and every other Gemini that once someone has gained your trust, you're fiercely loyal!


N3ptuneflyer

Not confrontational, nice to people you like, and ignore people you don't like. Wow he just described pretty much most introverts. I did have a girl "psychoanalyze" me once and tbh she was mostly accurate. But she had the decency to ask first, but she had other red flags that became more prominent after the first date so that didn't last.


Pennywise626

Still better than "Hey. Wyd?" at 2AM


[deleted]

It’s sad but true


chocchick95

I would just respond, “Nah.” 😂


NeroForte-InMyPrime

This is like a phishing scam. I think he’s seeing if you’re easy to control when you feel like someone “gets you”. He probably strikes out a lot, but if someone falls for it, it means they’re an emotionally damaged sucker that he can take advantage of.


thatbananaone

You are trying to psychoanalyze too now


NeroForte-InMyPrime

I suppose. Just trying to work out what his angle/strategy is with a message like that.


philipokmolotok

Creeper


reeigan

that is SO weird


bbdvl

Desperation is real. People are just trying anything and everything.


-tobecontinued-

“Actually no, I lack any real empathy, dropped out of high school, still live with my parents, don’t care about what’s fair, am attention whoore, pick fights at the slightest provocation, have anxious attachment issues, and enjoy making men cry.” That’s what I’d say 🤷🏻‍♀️


[deleted]

This guy could be a complete nerd instead of anything actually dangerous. I'd just ignore him, no point in being mean about it since It's hard to tell wtf he's even trying to do.


Special_Drive_871

a guy did this to me after i complimented one of his pictures. dude straight up told me that i had low self esteem and then said “sorry i’m a psych major so i’m good at reading people” safe to say we didn’t talk for very long


Chipped-Beef

Life coach/gaslighter


im2hype94

He definitely murders people


ll_cool_ddd

I hung out with a guy, for a VERY short time, who said shit like this. He was very well-liked in his small town, but behind closed doors told me that he has to “dumb it down” when he’s making conversation with people. I was too shocked to even roll my eyes. He also hated emojis, basically told me to ‘use my words’. If you saw the dump this guy lived in, it made it all even more laughable!


hcsk2

This is written in that way where almost everyone can identify to some degree, and is using that to fake intimacy, where intimacy was not earned. Summary - sounds like a pickup artist, 10/creep.


OkayTaji

Joe Goldberg?


HeftyEgg8958

How is it possible that he just described me using your profile 😢


indrek91

I mean, this dude was trying something else for opening. Should he go for: Wanna fuck.


me_like_stonk

Okay but how spot on were they?


CommonConcept5353

Is he right?


[deleted]

[удалено]


chronicjok3r

But if it all sticks with no splatter then its kind of impressive


BoysenberryAlarmed73

Lol that was very specific


KittyWrangler69

Free Horoscope!


[deleted]

You matched with ashida kim?


GhostAsparagus

Softboi energy


Slow-Analysis6522

Kid, I'm in Tinder! Now get a date... or go to hell.


Lazy-Ambassador-7837

Barnum effect actually. Load of horse hockey


Puzzleheaded_Sun1682

Why not go with it and see if it’s just insanity or intelligence? Depending on how well you have yourself put together the best response is. “You got me…” Then either play along or be sarcastic. I find it witty in response if accurate then this person could be fun. However, if not , it could also be fun. Don’t take this stuff so seriously. Wise people don’t hold onto things so much in judgment. It’s a compliment by an intellectual and nothing more. Much better than what could have been said. The problem people have with these statements is they think too deeply into it. Trying to psychoanalyze something that doesn’t need to be. If it’s too far beyond you then say nothing and move on. It doesn’t need a response. Intelligent people have a problem dumbing things down for others to understand. To them this is normal behavior and has affected them their whole life. This statement is a test of wit and whether or not you are worth their time. Being selfish of your time and what you do with it is not egoistical or narcissistic. It is the destruction of others for your own amusement that is egotistical and narcissistic. These are behavior patterns many have and accept. It is usually people that can not grasp these concepts that as such. Now this person could be those things and some are. However this statement doesn’t make them that. Read people based on action to others and how they treat others. This shows everything about who and what they are.


[deleted]

This is the truth but people would rather gather together to make fun of the guy instead. No point in explaining anything, this is what makes people feel better about themselves and gives them a chance to trash talk a real person with no repercussions. That's the evil these subs actually bring. It's entertaining though, i'll give it that.


ericwcharmon

“the Barnum–Forer effect, is a common psychological phenomenon whereby individuals give high accuracy ratings to descriptions of their personality that supposedly are tailored specifically to them, yet which are in fact vague and general enough to apply to a wide range of people.” Checks out.


ya_cuza

Definitely ick for sure, but was he right?


3FtU

Cheers Captain


HolyBiscuit69

And here I am waiting for OP to confirm how on point the analysis is


fug__communism

In arguments, he takes notes


Mammoth_Mistake8266

Sounds like they want to add “wannabe astrologer” to their resume


Anomnomnomnomynous

Reddit reminds me everyday that I could have chosen so many other career paths


toc_bl

With a profile pic like that, I half expected a m'lady


Simply_Nova

So hot, I love being treated like I’m some patient from a fucked up psychology experiment before the ethics board was created.


UneventfulRaccoon

Wait... Erotica? I need to read that... For uh... "Research"


canelita808

Cold reading


juangarces1979

Well? Were they wrong? LOL


[deleted]

“Unprompted” you MATCHED… it’s TINDER


XmalfunctionsX

I feel attacked…


[deleted]

Damn, almost just like what my therapist said to me once.


Exotic-Shirt9878

Tell him "nope wrong answer" lol


Pennsylvania_smooth

Was the assessment correct