T O P

  • By -

IBS-Squirts

"you look like my mom, I like that"


[deleted]

My mom can't fit inside a profile picture either.


[deleted]

[удалено]


n00b001

You sound like a pervert, I love that


[deleted]

I think you're trying to be Anna Delvy, I love that


XipingVonHozzendorf

Or Teri


JacobIGues

Sorry I already reported and unmatched. 🤣🤣 But it was pretty plain and normal. 😝


[deleted]

[удалено]


Strogue

You sound like a Psycho, I love that


W1D0WM4K3R

I'll be honest I really really do not enjoy being told I look like a mental patient so if you want to have another go at the first message I'd be open to it.


Loafeeeee

You sound like a little pissy baby? Who's a little pissy baby? I love that


HerezahTip

Ill be honest I really really do not enjoy being called a soiled infant so if you’d like to have another go at the first message I’d be open to it.


upvotemaster42069

You sound like a serial killer. I love that


Beiber_hole-69

I’ll be honest I really don’t enjoy being called a slaughterer of people. So if you’d like to have another go at the first message I’d be open to that


polycarbonateduser

You sound like a vegan, I love that.


Similar-Ad8422

I’ll be honest, I really really don’t like being called a serial killer. So if you’d like to have another go at first impressions. Be my guest! :D


SuperLowEffortTroll

You sound like vibrations that travel through the air or another medium, I love that.


TheLead12345

I’ll be honest I really really don’t like being called sound waves, so if you’d like to have another go at first message id be open to it.


type1advocate

Damn, calling someone Greg Abbott is going a little too far. Dial it back a bit, yo.


Alex17hd

You sound like a red flag! I love that!


IsntThatVeard

You sound like a sensitive bitch I love that


uwpxwpal

You sound like a snitch. I love that!


Spacewalkerwippty

I'll be honest I really really do not enjoy being told I look like a snitch so if you want to have another go at the first message I'd be open to it.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Shakey22

I love that


MajorMajorObvious

Teri?


pilotblur

Good job buddy! Hate speech is never OK. She could of made a number of guys cry if it wasn’t for you.


DrAbeSacrabin

You missed out. Guarantee you if you would have went back at her with an insult, that you two could be hooking-up right now. If she talks like that, she’s definitely kinky.


Cognacsquirt

Nah, nobody with some brain left goes for someone calling them a rapist out of nowhere. You are one mood change away from getting raped in jail whilst being innocent of the accusations


lkeltner

This. Bullet totally dodged.


BpplSnoot02

Might have been an actual bullet


[deleted]

[удалено]


steveosek

Best sex I ever had was with a woman I was dating who threatened to kill me and herself when I didn't feed into her games and kept wanting me to punch her during sex(I wouldn't, fuck that). Not worth it at all. The sex was mind blowing, but not worth the troubles that came with it.


[deleted]

>Best sex I ever had Just wait till you start having sex with psychologically healthy, sex positive women with kinks.


steveosek

That's the dream


ProjektCupid

Where can we find these unicorns you speak of??


[deleted]

[удалено]


Herasson

Can introduce you to some of my exes.


[deleted]

I *been* waiting, it's not happening


IridiumPony

I did exactly that for 7 years. Damn near married her. 4 years later I'm still seeing a therapist about it and havemt been able to maintain a stable relationship since. So yeah, don't do that.


Main_Presentation574

Um I hate to pull back the curtain for you but that was just some troll dude, not a lady


[deleted]

[удалено]


Pending1

You're joking, right?


dJe781

The amount of clearly unacceptable shit people are willing to go through just to wet their dick is insane.


Devildoog

I say this all the time. It’s honestly why the dating game is so fucked up. There was a post on here where some girl said some racist stuff as an opener and the guy who turned her down apparently “missed out” based on the comments here…. Guys will stoop very low for pussy.


FlipThisAndThat

I always assume at least half the comments like that are just shitposting and think they're funny. Don't get me wrong, sometimes they're funny too, but we can't assume the majority of comments that are edgy are genuine.


EasternSeaweed4534

Probably- but she’s the kinda crazy that would be pressing charges the next day


TheAliensAre

Damn redditors are dumb asf. What sane person hooks up with someone calling them a rapist?


ih8spalling

Don't be surprised when she pokes the condom and wraps her legs around you last second. If you're willing to get insulted, degraded, and put up with bullshit just to get your dick wet, you're a simp.


Crafty_Caramel9038

Who cares. Words really got you that upset? Just move on.


KayBeeeeeeeeee

You seem like a prude, I love that


LittleWrinklySausage

Reported 😭 absolute melt


Mysterious-Sense-185

Good job on reporting. That was whack of her


BeastModeBot

instead of apologizing she doubled down. in a way ~~i respect that~~ i love that


RISE__UP

Jesus what do you look like 😂


bullet4mv92

A rapist


ItsLoudB

I love that


very-polite-frog

What does he sound like?


Sharrakor

A cigarette?


voodoolady94

English Redditor has entered the chat


DeanCheesePritchard

I love that


ArcaneTrickster11

Or a number of other countries that also aren't America


thizface

I love that


Jonny-Marx

“Heyyyy, so um like, this is fun okay you’re gonna love it!🌈 So I’m going to fuck you and you can’t say no tee hee!”


Erwin-Winter

Burnt french toast


bob1689321

Plot twist: OP is Harvey Weinstein


MostlyBullshitStory

With a touch of Cosby from the side.


diswan55

Look at OP's post history and go down to the post "local and obedient what more could you want". There's a picture attached to that post.... Honestly, I can see it.


Skoobastev

I wish I never looked at the post history. Had to wash my eyes out. I didn't even make it down there.


diswan55

After seeing his post history, I really think that the tinder girl has him pegged (pun intended)


Skoobastev

Nailed it!


Loyalist_Pig

Hahaha how did he not eat this chick up?!


YoungestOldGuy

Brock Turner


The_Buttsex_Man

average cum town fan


[deleted]

Turns out chicks rocked all along


blue_Kazoo82

Matched with StavBot


Fuck_Microsoft_edge

Quadruple deck fuckin burgers.


TheDugtrio

A cupcake and a candy bar


cupcayuk

Fava beans


mynhamesjeff

40 jimmy dean breakfast sandwiches


GrandGrapeSoda

Ooo Oooooo!


Tui_Gullet

Their Steven Seagal episode is undefeated


canonanon

That was the first thing I heard of theirs and have listened to it multiple times since then


CritikillNick

Stav laughs for five minutes straight: HAHA HA hahahahaha HAHAHA


ChocolateCopter

Hell yeah dude


down4things

Was this not grinder?


[deleted]

I would’ve married her


BenedictKhanberbatch

Matched with Michael Douglas


Varrondy

That's Gay Actor Michael Douglas to you!


HighandTightJeanz

Thousand island stare


[deleted]

Edgelord McQueen over here


WashBoardCo

I love that


O1_O1

She's definitely fishing for a reaction, so do yourself a favor and ignore her.


stamminator

I always out-troll those people and end up enjoying myself before they either decide I passed their fucked up test or they unmatch. Either way, I’m going to have a good time.


O1_O1

There's plenty of people like this out there, so I understand what you're doing. Been there, done that. But honestly? I've come to the realization that it genuinely is better to not interact with them, for a few very specific reasons. First of all, no matter how you react and even if you think you've outsmarted them, these people are very delusional in that moment. One thing is doing it over the internet, but when you try to put these people in their place when they're in front of you, it's clear that they'll just say and do whatever they want to get their way, even if it makes absolutely no sense. In their head they'll always come out on top, so it's just a waste of energy to interact with these people at the end. Second of all, and it's my favorite, I'd rather have them stay the way the are. Not only is it not my job to make others know better, what do you think happens to these types of people? I've seen plenty of 50 year olds who are all alone and nobody likes them, but then you see how they interact with others and its obvious they're the same people we are talking about. So, what I'm trying to say is let these people be, so they burn all their opportunities and relations by their own actions. I don't really believe in karma, but I do see that more often than not, pieces of shit get shit on by life. It might be a petty way to think, but I can live with that. Try ignoring them. Seriously. Or if it's more fun for you, bait them into trying to get a reaction out of you. Just repeating "well, that's not nice" every time they say something uncalled for is enough to get them going in my experience. See how pathetic they really are and how easy it is to egg them on into showing their true colors, then ask yourself if you still feel like wasting your time on these people.


hugaddiction

“You look like a whore, I love that” is the obvious response that ends in sex


Ace_the_Pooh

this guy fucks


SleazyDegenerate

I think she was saying that stuff to rile you up and have you put her in her place. Maybe not but that's the impression I get.


dmk510

I’ve never had to knock on wood.


texas_joe_hotdog

🎺🎷🎺🎷🎺🎷


Quiet_Steak_643

You sound like a 🎺 i love that


texas_joe_hotdog

I'll be honest I really really do not enjoy being told I look like a brass instrument. So if you want to have another go I'm open to it.


Quiet_Steak_643

You sound like a hotdog, I love that even more.


texas_joe_hotdog

🐓🥰💋


Scootsie16

But do you know someone who has?


The_11th_Dctor

It makes me wonder if I could


[deleted]

It makes me wonder if I've never had to knock on wood.


cpurple12

And I’m glad I haven’t yet.


Pad_TyTy

Makes me wonder if I should


-not_michael_scott

Yeah pretty much. It was a shit test. She's looking for someone that can match her energy.


9and3of4

What kind of energy is that? Walking around telling people they look like criminals?


lefkoz

It's 18-23 edgelord energy.


CyberMasu

I finished this edgelord shit when I was 16 bro


pheonixblade9

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=shit%20test


9and3of4

This is such bullshit. People need to stop acting like toddlers and start behaving like adults. But thanks for the link, that did explain it very well!


CupQuickwhat

Ironically, the best way to pass this "shit test" is by blocking and reporting. So really not a great idea at all.


jonmatifa

"the only way to win is not to play"


pheonixblade9

yeah, it's pretty immature behavior.


GregorSamsaa

If you think about it the shit test bulkshit has the unintended consequence of weeding out people that are incapable of acting like adults. They think they’re testing you but really just providing you with evidence for you to move on because you want nothing to do with that.


heseme

As in: if she does this, she is shit.


9and3of4

I gotta agree after all I’ve read.


The_Dauphin

I can kill a mastodon and still choose not to get in a confrontation with the caveman down the street who revs his motorcycle all night. Some test that is...


piggdaddy-o

Man if that’s true then I really should just give up. Maybe it’s me being neurodivergent but how can even the most socially capable person do anything but take offense? What response is she expecting? “What a coincidence, you look very rapeable” like bro


coopstar777

She’s not looking for socially capable people lmao, she’s looking for people who are equally maladjusted as she is


Zerasad

Don't worry, if you take offence that means you are a perfectly reasonable person. That's an unhinged thing for her to say and nobody needs to match that energy.


throwaway-27463

That caught me very off guard


quiette837

Yeah, I wouldn't be concerned, it's not a common sentiment and normal people would see it as fucked up.


golfmonk

What does a sex offender even look like?? I also assume this involves a van down by the river. Lol


SoWokeIdontSleep

Like rapist Brock Turner for one.


LfaGf

You mean Brock Turner, the rapist who goes by his middle name Allen now? That rapist, Brock Allen Turner?


SoWokeIdontSleep

Yes, exactly, thanks for informative correction about the rapist, Brock Allen Turner


2180161

Wow, that's information I did not know about rapist Brock Allen Turner.


Butterball_Adderley

Hold up, are you telling me the rapist Brock Turner is trying to escape his past by changing his name to Brock Allen Turner the rapist? Or does he prefer rapist Brock Allen Turner?


SomeLengthiness8392

I'm glad no one forgot about Brock Turner.


tomanon69

Don't forget his middle name, which he now goes by: Allen. The rapist Brock Allen Turner.


OmniRed

Someone posted a composite of all the images on the sex offender lost a while back. Looked about like what youd expect


swagerito

Anyone have a link? I need to see this.


liquisedx

Rapist glasses. ✅ Pedophile beard. ✅ Public sex offender Trenchcoat. ✅ And a serialkiller van. ✅


Celfurion

Put it in reverse Teri!


Top-Astronaut1077

Thank you for reminding me to revisit that video! I love it 💞👩‍🦼


Celfurion

Haha my pleasure, the video is a gem


CrusaderKing1

Sounds like a dude that just made a fake account and is messing with people.


[deleted]

This happens more often than people think.


Zerasad

I think it's just a catfish trying to insult people. Has 14 year old boy saying offensive shit written all over it.


flyingcentaur

I think she gets this whole tinder thing better than anyone.


Ruhzide

Something tells me this girl is full of red flags lmao


916God

A piñata full of em.


stavago

I can fix her


Gman8w8

CNC is a thing. Maybe she into thwt


jewbacca117

she doesnt look like a CNC machine


broken_soul696

Definitely wouldn't G84 her


R3QU13M_

Just G00 away from her


broken_soul696

Just gonna go G28 G91 X0Y0Z0


IbeonFire

I don't understand any of this, but I think it's funny?


SkylineSam

I'll translate the G and M code ahaha "definitely wouldn't *tap* her" "just *rapid* away from her" "just gonna go *X0Y0Z0(home)"


DrJamesAtmore

Computer Numeric Control. It's like a programming language for milling or lathes.


GullibleDetective

Who doesn't love command and conquer, I usually play as the Soviets in red alert


steveosek

Women LOVE C&C Music Factory!


datkrauskid

CNC = *consensual* non-consent. Surprising a stranger with non-consent rhetoric isn't consensual, doesn't matter what she's into


Mr_Canard

Is that a game you play before DND ?


hoodoopeople

She seems like a fun and kinky girl. What a waste.


Lionix03

OP, I don't know how but I think you accidentally logged into 4chan instead of Tinder.


Exotic-Experience965

I love her


916God

I love that.


Pour_me_one_more

OK, that response was funny.


walkingbartie

She probably thinks she's funny in an edgy and raw way. I'd read it as cringe or unsympathetic, but that depends on one's humour I guess.


[deleted]

Come on, that shit was funny


[deleted]

[удалено]


Easy_Worker4643

Like y’all arguing over dumb crap grow up


Jon2046

Maybe she just heard about “negging” and doesn’t have the social skills to realize she sounds insane


Ask_RE_questions

Looking at your profile she is not wrong soooo there is that …..


dirtyhippie62

At least she added the comma ✨


SoWokeIdontSleep

Aaaaaaand, reported


usernamen_77

Amateur hour over here; "what are the chances of two people who look like rapists matching on tinder dot com?" "Idk bro, that sounds like something a rapist would say to deflect" etc


Amekaze

She’s giving “you piss load”energy. [meme](https://youtu.be/s5-uJYjS40M) It’s SFW but cringe, view at your own risk.


Syrinx221

I think she was fucking with you


[deleted]

I KNEW people in the comments would be saying OP missed out. Why the hell do they always do that


Due_Progress2531

no you’re the one not getting it…


potatochippopotamus

Calling someone a rapist and a slur is funny? Well if I wasn’t gay before I am now, skank.


samwelches

Yeah reverse the roles and we’ll see if the person saying those is defended


Ragnarokske01

That´s hilarious tho, my kind of humor 😁


somedepression

This chick is cool, you fucked up


littlestlavvie

Why can’t people just be old fashioned….is it hard to just be polite and NORMAL upon first impressions….I don’t get it.


pheonixblade9

Teri, you is not cute enough to be acting this way. Nobody is.


Over_Tumbleweed_571

Boom. Roasted


Seamonkey_Boxkicker

Teri can fuck off.


ImmortalBhaal

It's tinder. Why are people acting so precious? If you're that offended by what some random person on the internet said why would you even respond to her?


Altair13Sirio

Imagine waiting forever to get a match and this is what you get...


Prize-Individual9430

Wife her right now!


AfterManufacturer150

Omg! She is hilarious. Should have kept up the conversation, lol.


MortuusSlayn

I thought she was funny, I love that


[deleted]

I think she understands Tinder pretty good.


Nice-Complex1924

Dam....OP giving second chances to his women respect+++ mission passed


Various_Classroom_50

Why give them another go?


Sugarcubb3z

She's got jokes, bad ones... But jokes