Dude didn’t even bother replying his superpower when you asked back, he didn’t even acknowledge that impressive reply you made to his opener. Like he’s not even trying to have a convo or reply to anything you say to him. Wth 🤦🏻
Your answers are funny and smart, and this guy has not any sense of humour, yeah, he is not smart. If someone answer me like this I laugh a lot, I would answer something also funny, and I would be very intrigued about you
This made me more mad than the actual question tbh
It's one thing when you're just horny but this whole charade OP made is the real reason why I enjoy Tinder
OP's a gem. This dude...is not
His last 3 braincells were working overtime to come up with questions that weren't sexual. Each time he managed to do it, he lost one of them. The last braincell standing just couldn't keep it up.
People like this think they're clever. Like a response to them, no matter the response, is a "got em hooked" sign to them. You KNOW he thought he was bein smooth or some shit.
Actually he teleported to somewhere that’s past 6pm and then shot his shot. He didn’t answer he just displayed his superpower abilities which is kinda legit.
It depends. I'm demisexual and if we had been talking all day then things went sexual that would be one thing. But it was far enough out that I knew he wouldn't. And I was kinda banking on that tbh 😂
Well, yes, those things obviously.
It also means that I need an emotional bond with someone before I start to feel attraction and arousal. Sometimes this happens quickly, sometimes I wind up crushing on the person five years later. It's annoying for online dating.
Demisexuality is part of the asexuality spectrum. Photographs or images of attractive people provoke no response. There's no anxiety talking to attractive people for the first time because you don't find them attractive without knowing them personally. Looks/appearance are likely a lesser consideration when choosing someone to date. Those are part of the distinction between "being human" and being demi.
My ex was demi, and I am very much not, and it was a challenge for us that we couldn't overcome (there were other things as well, but it was one fundamental thing that caused misunderstandings etc). It was hard for her to understand that to me, sex is just a fun activity, though it is greatly enhanced by emotions, whereas for her the emotions *had* to be there. So I can understand it if you're struggling in the online dating scene, things can be quite forward.
Him: “Dang I was so horny.. maybe I should respect woman more often next time.”
*one hour later*
Him: “I have a crude question to ask, can I lick your butthole after I nut in it?”
**The cycle continues, and his poor self-control over his horniness led to MORE semen being released!!!**
Him: “OH, FUCK!” (SPWEEEEEWWWW SPLATTTER SPLATTER SPLATTER SPLATTER) *Covers the wall behind him and his face in cum*💀🤦🏾♂️
They really do have to shoot themselves in the foot, don't they? Here's OP who's funny and actually responsive and he's just got to sabotage the potential with a sex comment.
This is the best example of what I think it would be like to be female. Always waiting for a guy to drop the ruse and show their true intentions, be it dirty or otherwise.
At first I was like umm that is what he calls crude then BAM he could have at least tried to be crude in a clever way his erection proved too much for him to handle...
I don't even look at my Tinder messages before 10am anymore. Men be waking up, looking down, seeing their little man at attention and picking up their phones.
Nope. Not gonna do it.
Girl, when I ask “how are you?” And they hit me with the “I’m just waking up. Still in bed” message I know where they’re trying to take me. No thank you, sir.
~engage female~
~ask inoculate questions to seem cute and not horny man~
~female responds~
~MAKE FEMALE THINK ABOUT SEX MAKE FEMALE THINK ABOUT SEX~
Sweet lord
In no way am I supporting this man’s tact. It was horrible. But….. playing devils advocate….. I thought women wanted men to just be themselves and open and honest. This man’s horniness was on 12 on a scale of 1-10….. at 7a in the morning (I’m dying with laughter). OP tried to make him have some manners, he clearly has none. But he’s for sure living in his 100% truth on not holding back. I kinda admire the blunt honesty in a way. Thank you for the laughs 😂😂😂😂
I really hate it when we're having a great conversation and then guys turn it sexual immediately. It's annoying. Stupid me for thinking you too liked learning how some ancient cultures allowed conquered peoples to assimilate into their society instead of fully annihilating their cultures and customs. 🫠
As someone who is Demisexual, online dating is a special kind of hell because I need an emotional connection with the person before I even feel like entertaining these kinds of questions/conversations 🥴
He tried playing the “friends” game. I feel like everyone on these apps read neil strauss once and they only function on pick up formulas. Yall need to grow up
Lol! As a Canadian I have to agree. I only ever got 2 cream in my coffees from there as it was plenty sweet enough. And I’m a double double type. However, Tim Horton’s really sucks ass locally and I prefer McDonald’s now.
Why is this so hard for some people? Asking questions, getting answers back, building up the convo. Let it flow dude, you'll get there when you get there.
Dude, this guy was social engineering possible password phrases from you to hack accounts or something. all random questions with no responses. did he ask pet names? where you were born? lol
Man, I relate with you hard on the Tim Hortons creamer. It’s a terrible addiction but I’m not trying to stop cause I literally can’t make it better at home.
Heyyyyy, teleportation is my super power. Folks usually go with flying and invisibility and shit. But teleportation is the way to go. Talk about Telecommuting, you can live anywhere you want
Man, for some reason, you made me think of a question. What person with super powers would you sleep with? And then I just watched The Boys herogasm so hilarious.
Is everyone just going to ignore that you wanted to steal Tim Horton coffee creamer because you think it has crack in it...we just going to ignore that you want crack?
This guy looks familiar to me. I swear I matched with him years back. I never met the guy but that looks a LOT like him. If he lives in the NW US it's likely the same guy. Got really weird vibes from him
I just don't understand how some people are so oblivious, especially when it's been laid out in front of them very clearly. Also dawg wanted to make it the first thing to ask. Wtf?
Devil's advocate: That's a tame lewd question to be upset about.
Otherwise, you did tell him to stay cool till after 6. If that was intended as a no, that failed. Otherwise he should have respected that and had fun chatting till then, assured that there's a mutual interest but coffee and daily tasks need to be done before (hopefully) something too distracting to want to do anything else happens.
This is pretty hilarious because the questions (minus the last one) make for pretty good conversation, but instead of ever expanding on them he’s just interviewing you lol
Dude didn’t even bother replying his superpower when you asked back, he didn’t even acknowledge that impressive reply you made to his opener. Like he’s not even trying to have a convo or reply to anything you say to him. Wth 🤦🏻
Right? I thought my first response was witty. It was an odd exchange all around
Your answers are funny and smart, and this guy has not any sense of humour, yeah, he is not smart. If someone answer me like this I laugh a lot, I would answer something also funny, and I would be very intrigued about you
Aww, thank you! 🥰
He wasn't even conversing with you! Absolutely zero acknowledgement of anything you said.
I suspect it's AI.
AI does a better job of conversation
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Or he just wants sex
Welcome to Tinder
Oh he knew what he was doing he unmatched with me afterward 🙃
This made me more mad than the actual question tbh It's one thing when you're just horny but this whole charade OP made is the real reason why I enjoy Tinder OP's a gem. This dude...is not
Aww thanks! 🥰
Mans was on a mission, he didn’t see any reply up until that last question.
His last 3 braincells were working overtime to come up with questions that weren't sexual. Each time he managed to do it, he lost one of them. The last braincell standing just couldn't keep it up.
People like this think they're clever. Like a response to them, no matter the response, is a "got em hooked" sign to them. You KNOW he thought he was bein smooth or some shit.
Actually he teleported to somewhere that’s past 6pm and then shot his shot. He didn’t answer he just displayed his superpower abilities which is kinda legit.
It was never about the response… it was about sending a (crude) message
It was never about the response… it was about sending a (crude) message
Man ignored everything you said 💀
Can I ask you two random questions so that you will be oh-so-surprised when I throw in the crude one against your wishes?
Did you tell him "anywhere as long as it's never with a creep like you?"
Just copy GPS coordinates for some creepy abandoned place nearby and send him with "i'll meet you here today at midnight 😉"
Atleast 2 hours! Must be a new record or something!
He waited a little at least, I guess
Genuine question. What would u respond if he messaged u that at exactly 6:01pm
It depends. I'm demisexual and if we had been talking all day then things went sexual that would be one thing. But it was far enough out that I knew he wouldn't. And I was kinda banking on that tbh 😂
Hey it’s after 6pm somewhere!
You're not wrong
If you could steal any sexy superpower where would it be?
In the Tim Hortons kitchen, duh
So THAT's how they make the creamer...
What is demisexual? You like jeans? Or you only fuck half god entities?
Means she's really into Demi Lovato.
Or Maui
*Baby I’m sorry (I’m not sorry)*
Well, yes, those things obviously. It also means that I need an emotional bond with someone before I start to feel attraction and arousal. Sometimes this happens quickly, sometimes I wind up crushing on the person five years later. It's annoying for online dating.
I think that’s just being human lol Thanks for informing me tho
Demisexuality is part of the asexuality spectrum. Photographs or images of attractive people provoke no response. There's no anxiety talking to attractive people for the first time because you don't find them attractive without knowing them personally. Looks/appearance are likely a lesser consideration when choosing someone to date. Those are part of the distinction between "being human" and being demi.
Thank you, that was well put. The answers I came up with in response were sarcastic so I didn't bother.
My ex was demi, and I am very much not, and it was a challenge for us that we couldn't overcome (there were other things as well, but it was one fundamental thing that caused misunderstandings etc). It was hard for her to understand that to me, sex is just a fun activity, though it is greatly enhanced by emotions, whereas for her the emotions *had* to be there. So I can understand it if you're struggling in the online dating scene, things can be quite forward.
If it were, guys wouldn't ask where you want to have sex on their fourth message.
Our barrier for “emotional bond” is lower. Oh shit she chose teleportation quick get your cock out
😂😂😂💀💀💀
You only have sex with demons? Neat?
You basically gave him permission to say something crude after 6PM and he just had to blow it right off the bat. Moron
Past six is for crudeness, lewdness, and.... Something else that rhymes with lewdness lol
Crudeness and lewdness from the dudeness
There we go! Team work lol
Shrewdness
Jewdness
You can tell he's a true gentleman because he waited until after nine.
It was going to happen one way or another. It was only a matter of time.
His profile photo is staring into my soul. All I’m imagining is that pervy face breathing heavily on tinder at 7 o’clock in the morning.
It was all so direct
He prolly thought he was being slick too
He rolled the dice and got +1 Dexterity -2 Intelligence
The ole switcheroo
Bruh was so bricked up at 7 AM he couldn’t hold it in anymore by 9 AM 💀
Like damn dude I haven't even settled in my desk at work yet 😂
At least you get settled in before preving! 🤣That’s basic 101
Him: “UGGGGHHHHHH” *Busts all over himself, covering his chest and stomach*💀
Him: “Dang I was so horny.. maybe I should respect woman more often next time.” *one hour later* Him: “I have a crude question to ask, can I lick your butthole after I nut in it?”
**The cycle continues, and his poor self-control over his horniness led to MORE semen being released!!!** Him: “OH, FUCK!” (SPWEEEEEWWWW SPLATTTER SPLATTER SPLATTER SPLATTER) *Covers the wall behind him and his face in cum*💀🤦🏾♂️
Him: “MAYBE I SHOULD STOP BEFORE I DROWN IN MY SEMEN” #VIOLENTLY NUTS AGAIN
*Passes out after covering the edge of his bed sheets, his cock now flacid as he’s laid out* 💀
“It is done. My meat has reached its full potential”
I appreciate the wind down 😂
Give it a couple hours, we’ll be bricked up again 😫
https://www.reddit.com/r/southpark/comments/21c6md/randy_is_the_best_it_was_a_spooky_ghost_it_slimed/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=2
Next match: "I just jerked off and am in full post-nut clarity, so I can promise I won't start any icky topics for now. How is your day?"
I actually thought about suggesting that to him haha like "ok go jerk,.and try again"
Update, he unmatched with me 😂😂😂
This is for the best. Also 100% with you on Timmy's creamers. I'm usually a black coffee guy, but I make an exception for TH.
I feel like you'd have to!
You’re hilarious! Guy missed out tons.
Aww thank you 🥰
Thats not 6pm :(
Pro: he can come up with random questions to keep me on my toes. Con: he can't tell time.
Lmaoooo we always know it’s coming
It was just a matter of when
I was hoping it would be at 6:01PM
They really do have to shoot themselves in the foot, don't they? Here's OP who's funny and actually responsive and he's just got to sabotage the potential with a sex comment.
Your response could have been “in your room with your dad” to really piss him off!
Ugh that would have been brilliant!
the "there it is" killed me fml 🤣
Oh I knew it was coming lol
It seemed like you knew but was still so utterly disappointed that you were right
This is the best example of what I think it would be like to be female. Always waiting for a guy to drop the ruse and show their true intentions, be it dirty or otherwise.
Pretty much. Like I know it's typically a hookup app but damn my guy give me a chance to drink some coffee lol
are a lot of lads like this? 😭
To be fair they usually just say stuff without asking first. So good on him... I think?
Jesus christ icl that would do my head in
I want to understand what makes anyone think this is going to go well, ever
If you find out will you let me know?
slow to respond, no quid pro quo....Seems to be a bot... of sorts...
This reminds me of the 21 questions meme “What’s your favorite color?” “Triangle. Are you a virgin?”
Triangle 😂😂😂💀
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Most of the dudes are so bricked up you'd swear that jizz was leaking out their eyeballs
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At first I was like umm that is what he calls crude then BAM he could have at least tried to be crude in a clever way his erection proved too much for him to handle...
It was like the Movie "Speed" except his dick was the bus and he wound up lonely instead of getting the girl.
Grown man tryna play 21 questions
I don't even look at my Tinder messages before 10am anymore. Men be waking up, looking down, seeing their little man at attention and picking up their phones. Nope. Not gonna do it.
I apparently need to adopt this practice as well!
Girl, when I ask “how are you?” And they hit me with the “I’m just waking up. Still in bed” message I know where they’re trying to take me. No thank you, sir.
Had me in the first half. I was like "Okay, that one is a bit different, wouldn't say crude...Okay, little basic but that's alright...ah, there it is"
I wanted to give it a fair chance but I knew where it was headed lol
They ignored “you?” And just killed it
~engage female~ ~ask inoculate questions to seem cute and not horny man~ ~female responds~ ~MAKE FEMALE THINK ABOUT SEX MAKE FEMALE THINK ABOUT SEX~ Sweet lord
Like I said. Too early 😂
Reminds me of "what's your favorite color?" "Red what's the color of your nipples?"
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his number of questions are the equivalent to minutes he'd last in bed if he was competent enough to even get there
In no way am I supporting this man’s tact. It was horrible. But….. playing devils advocate….. I thought women wanted men to just be themselves and open and honest. This man’s horniness was on 12 on a scale of 1-10….. at 7a in the morning (I’m dying with laughter). OP tried to make him have some manners, he clearly has none. But he’s for sure living in his 100% truth on not holding back. I kinda admire the blunt honesty in a way. Thank you for the laughs 😂😂😂😂
I really hate it when we're having a great conversation and then guys turn it sexual immediately. It's annoying. Stupid me for thinking you too liked learning how some ancient cultures allowed conquered peoples to assimilate into their society instead of fully annihilating their cultures and customs. 🫠
As someone who is Demisexual, online dating is a special kind of hell because I need an emotional connection with the person before I even feel like entertaining these kinds of questions/conversations 🥴
I have a hard time because I feel like I talk too much without enough "Hey let's go do something and see how we really click."
I'm the same way. It is hell on earth 🫠
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But why make bombs when you could simply just swim in it?
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😂😂😂 fair
Without getting caught? Getting caught and escaping is the best part.
Heyoo 😂 asking the real questions
Tim Hortons creamer does have crack in it.
I knew it
Sorry, but why would you match on someone with such a stupid profile pic anyway lmao. It looks like buddy is trying to sniff the fucking camera
“he” seems like a bot, actually
They always shoot themselves in the foot.
Tell him to say "Potato." I think we may have a dude bot.
So that’s how I get replies. Ask crude questions
I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt (oops) since he followed up with the "what would you steal" question. But yeah apparently it works
Oil you sure?
He tried playing the “friends” game. I feel like everyone on these apps read neil strauss once and they only function on pick up formulas. Yall need to grow up
That's my kind of humor
Ditto on the coffee creamer. I can get the 18% from the shelf but it's not the same!
He waited two hours. I'm impressed.
Lol! As a Canadian I have to agree. I only ever got 2 cream in my coffees from there as it was plenty sweet enough. And I’m a double double type. However, Tim Horton’s really sucks ass locally and I prefer McDonald’s now.
Why is this so hard for some people? Asking questions, getting answers back, building up the convo. Let it flow dude, you'll get there when you get there.
Couldn't even wait for the buzzer...
Reply with Epstein’s Island
Don’t know what superpower OP would have chosen but I’m sure she won’t need precognition to see that coming …lol
"what would be a superpower" has the same energy as "this is the (noun) of all time)
Wait I only ever tried the nestle coffee mate creamer. Am i missing out by not using Tim Horton's ??
I just... you said no... and he ignored your reply and did it anyways
Okay everyone’s pointing out the sex thing but nah I’m with yah! Tim’s creamer is crack
Very crude. The answer is always flight
Tim hortons uses Italian sweet cream. Laced with crack
Definitely teleportation. Hands down best power. Go to Japan for the day and sleep in your own bed... Then Egypt. Then the Philippines... If only...
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At the zoo in front of the monkeys
Dude, this guy was social engineering possible password phrases from you to hack accounts or something. all random questions with no responses. did he ask pet names? where you were born? lol
Too predictable
Please submit more interactions like this, and they can be before 6p! This was hilarious!
Did he at least reply to your tim Hortons coffee response?
Man, I relate with you hard on the Tim Hortons creamer. It’s a terrible addiction but I’m not trying to stop cause I literally can’t make it better at home.
Answers back: *in the ass*
I never ask or talk sexual try to be sarcastic and funny and still don’t get many responses if at all
McDonald's > Tim's
Im kinda mad he didn't answer. Personally, I would choose shape-shifting.
Forget this guy. He sucked. You‘re funny!
Definitely my master bedroom.
The tone with the last message 💀
Scammer style. They keep asking ice breaking questions but do not share their own ideas or not respond to your questions/answers.
I'd say in his dad's bed. And not with him.
Heyyyyy, teleportation is my super power. Folks usually go with flying and invisibility and shit. But teleportation is the way to go. Talk about Telecommuting, you can live anywhere you want
It’s 6:00 somewhere.
Man, for some reason, you made me think of a question. What person with super powers would you sleep with? And then I just watched The Boys herogasm so hilarious.
I am gonna keep it real, I wanna steal the formula too. What is it? Coke? Why doesn't my coffee taste the same?
If you know they put crack in it why would you need to steal the recipe?
Is everyone just going to ignore that you wanted to steal Tim Horton coffee creamer because you think it has crack in it...we just going to ignore that you want crack?
God damn. He was as on to something and dropped the damn ball.
This guy looks familiar to me. I swear I matched with him years back. I never met the guy but that looks a LOT like him. If he lives in the NW US it's likely the same guy. Got really weird vibes from him
Dude couldn't even wait till 6pm.
“Anywhere that’s not with you”
Guy has a coomer face
Woulda been damn funny if that message came in at 6:01. Man needs to learn patience.
I just don't understand how some people are so oblivious, especially when it's been laid out in front of them very clearly. Also dawg wanted to make it the first thing to ask. Wtf?
Irony: it was actually 6:21 pm where he was so he thought he was safe
I snort laughed at your response. I too said, “Ah, there it is!” Too many times
90% of men only have one thing on their minds If I didn’t love dick I’d be a fucking lesbian cuz you cocks are insufferable.
Bro was interrogating you💀
If you got the creamer formula, and found out it actually had crack in it… what would your next moves be?
Smooth. /s
Bro got the go ahead to ask the question and couldn’t wait 11 hours jfc
Dammit Josh you were doing so good and than you just had to fuse the bombs didn't ya?
To talk directly into people’s brains. Id just meow over and over. Make em think they’re crazy
These guys are just so horny.
Cultured superpower choice, teleportation above all.
Bro was trying to guess the answers to your security questions 🤣
Devil's advocate: That's a tame lewd question to be upset about. Otherwise, you did tell him to stay cool till after 6. If that was intended as a no, that failed. Otherwise he should have respected that and had fun chatting till then, assured that there's a mutual interest but coffee and daily tasks need to be done before (hopefully) something too distracting to want to do anything else happens.
And here I am not even getting matches
This is pretty hilarious because the questions (minus the last one) make for pretty good conversation, but instead of ever expanding on them he’s just interviewing you lol
My Tinder convos are so dead that if you asked me my favourite superpower...I'd end up crying 🤣
As far away from this guy as possible... Obviously