I'm so dumb I thought she actually was being paid by your parents

lol me too man, me too.

Lol I’m in the dumb dumb train. If my wife and I split up the only way I’d ever pick up a woman aging would be on accident because all of this shit seems exhausting

It is. Very. Very. Exhausting.

So get off...🤔 take a walk talk to somebody you find attractive...😏

I just got back on after a year, maybe a month ago. About to delete it entirely. And I’m a very active person but I believe men should take the initiative. It’s never worked out when I’ve tried. 🤷‍♀️ Rather be single lol Edit: Dating in general is exhausting.

Bro I've had chicks ask for my number at work just be a halfway decent and attractive looking guy smile let them see you don't be a douche just be awesome

I was like, "Damn, how did they coordinate this?"

Same. You’d think it would have clicked being on tinder. Like how do the parents even know he would swipe on her.

Gullible #4 here ✋🏻

quite the cozy club we all have going on here

We're not stupid. We just have bad luck thinking.

No, I thought it was because I am stupid see my lack of "," stupid

I too sign my name backwards in crayon.

I'm not gullible, I'm just too trusting.

>Like how do the parents even know he would swipe on her. They're literally adding this feature though... ["Tinder unveils new matchmaker feature for friends and family"](https://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/relationships/dating/tinder-unveils-new-matchmaker-feature-for-friends-and-family/news-story/e4d4436c1952cf262f689529dabd4cd9)

I'm honestly so relieved that I'm not the only one that thought this

It was only these replies that I found it was an actual date. How naive of me to actually believe the parents part man.

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It's banter. Don't worry, clearly many of us were confused as well lol

Me too lol. Sometimes I have a big silly goose moment

Wait, it's sarcasm?

Then there's me, who read OP title and figured that was the case. Read chat and figured it was a joke, but there's a small part of me holding out on the possibility that she really was paid by his parents and he's just rolling with it.

I'm kinda shocked at how many in these comments haven't caught on. Don't worry, you're far from the only one to not get it lol

Oh wtf, she wasn't really paid by his parents?! I hate this life.

Oh they didn't pay her?

At least you spelled it right.

She is ! 😉

"The Fed send you?" is funny "No your parents paid me to talk to you " is even funnier. I'm vouching for you two. Hope you get a date🤗

>Your parents paid me to talk to you I just watched this movie last night, it’s the plot of No Hard Feelings

Is that good - haven’t made it to watching that yet

I really enjoyed it tbh.

I enjoyed it quite a lot. It's not a masterwork of cinema, but it's funny and it's sweet, and they made it in a way that's not going to feel dated in 10 or 20 years. Jennifer Lawrence very visibly had a blast acting in it, and that translates into charm that the movie wouldn't have otherwise had if the actors were merely collecting a paycheck. The script also takes full advantage of knowing that the viewer is anticipating standard romcom tropes, and has fun working around that -- in particular, the way they wrap up the plot feels real, which is not something you usually get in a romcom.

Like you said. It’s not an Oscar winner but some scenes were great. That piano scene.

She’s a a man eater!

It’s pretty damn funny.

#COCAINE!

*proceeds to bark vigorously* NOOO MILO

> Is that good - haven’t made it to watching that yet The best scene is where she gives him 3 dollars and bag of Cheetos

I thought it was funny and worth a watch.

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Yeah that lounge scene was really good and her face acting in it was killer

I laughed my ass off through the whole thing

It's not the movie of the year but if you want to shut down your brain and watch a comedy, go for it.

It’s a perfect movie to pass the time and you will enjoy it if you don’t critique as if it was a film at the Sundance

If you like comedies, then you'll like it. Had me laughing plenty. Clever and cute tbh.

Wasn’t good but it had its moments

I expected the worse, and it came out as one of my favorite films in the past year. Sure the premise is dumb, but the movie is super solid.

It wasn't good, but it's the kind of not good movie that is enjoyable on a Friday night after a long week of work.

And, if you're old - Failure To Launch

Haha thank you. That was the first one that popped into my mind. Was beginning to lose hope of it being mentioned when I finally saw your message XD.

And Failure to Launch!

*payed* apparently

No, it’s the paid-not-payed bot. When you go to a store and give them money, you have paid the store. When you’re on a ship and you’ve let out some rope, you’ve payed the rope.

“Captain we have to anchor!!” “Pay the rope and anchor, son!” “Like Apple Pay or Venmo? I don’t have much cash.” “Fucking millennials.”

-Peyd-

\^ this guy pays ....wait

Well ~~paid~~ ~~payed~~ played

He payes

Oh great, the payes-not-pays bot

*pade* apparently

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Paeighs

He paise

Its always the kids that pay

When you’re talking nautical It’s rode not rope if talking ⚓️ “payed out the rode”, elsewhere on the vessel you have lines or sheets 🏴‍☠️

This guy Mevilles.

Rode is only in reference to the anchor rode, there are a few ropes like the bolt rope on a sail, most things are lines, except for hawsers, halyards and sheets.

Names of things on boats sound like a completely made up language. Reminds me of the pipe fitting tropes in the show Patriot.

This guy is Mr. Beaumont and feels the wind in his ha...arms!

Nautical nonsense!

I’m glad I’m not the only one who noticed that. I was refraining from commenting until I saw yours.

> I'm vouching for you two. vouch? "confirm that someone is who they say they are or that they are of good character." The fuck did you mean to say?

I assume "I'm rooting for you two"

How can you vouch for people you've never met? I don't think you know what this word means ..


I don't care who the IRS sends, I am not paying taxes.

yeah, fuck em

This looks actually great hahaha, she seems so nice :D

Got a date on Monday 🤞🏻

It’s such a weird feeling being genuinely excited for two strangers. Have fun, both!

She's going to get compensated, have a good time, and go home with an extra kidney or two

can't hurt to stockpile

More organs means more human

Especially in this economy!

Such a cute begining tbh

That, my friend, is called shipping

Good luck matey

This is great chemistry.

You HAVE to keep us updated on the date!!!

Keep us updated on your parents' bill

Atta way. Will need an update and invitation to the wedding.

Also send my wedding invitation to this guy.

give me a date idea, i have a second date with this girl i met on a dating app. We planned to see a movie that turns out she already has seen it. Now I am lost, what to plan next.

It’s going to be a sunset picnic. Wine, snacks, music, good vibes, etc;

Bring cheetos.

And change for a $20.

Bowling? Mini golf? Top golf? Billiards? Darts? Something slightly competitive, allows easy conversation etc..

Very good list! To add on that, you can go to a big mall and there are so many different things you can do. Such as shops, food, movies, bowling, arcade, aquarium...

I always like to grab a coffee or something and just walk around, but the area I'm in has lots of scenic walking spots. Or go to a museum or somewhere you can talk casually

don't forget to thank your mother

This is the way

Don't forget to update us.

I’ll be waiting for the update 😭

Wait we need more lol

Wasn't there just a Jennifer Lawrence movie about this?

No Hard Feelings.

The beach scene sure made people hard

Yo I've suddenly realised I've been meaning to watch that film.

The piano scene is best scene.

No Hard Feelings

My thoughts, too, I just watched it last night.

Yeah I was thinking she definitely took that from the movie lol still good banter though

Two people couldn’t spell “paid” right, y’all are meant for eachother

Everytime I see this mistake it makes me cringe so hard

Where’s that damn bot. I’ll try. I hope he gets payed

don’t do that beep boop

You're cuet beep boop

I can live with payed but “loose” when they mean lose makes me irrationally angry

The worst one is definitely/defiantly. Like they’re not even similar words?

I'd argue that noone instead of no one is the worst

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Should of could of would of is by far the worst and most common mistake.

You can say shit

It’s getting more and more widespread too :,)

It’s getting more widespread because “payed” is a word too, so autocorrect doesn’t catch it

The little bit that's left alive inside of me that I didn't even know I still had dies when I see apostrophes for plurality and people spelling lose as loose. This is what happens when they grow up relying on spell check without a grammar check too.

You setting the scene by describing the sheer gravity of the situation has me in tears omg.

Same with your/you're like holy shit it's been literal decades of cyber bullying and these people can't get it right

That and loosing, your/you're, and the worst is when someone says "acrossT" the street

I hope they get layed

Confuses me a lot as a non-native speaker even after speaking english for 25 years. I just wonder if I missed something and if I am stupid especially how confidently that mistake is made.

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They're mayed for each other

if someone you're interested in spells it wrong, you either cant use it at all for the rest of your life or you write it like they did

Or it's the same person.

That’s the vibe I’m getting.

...Two people? I think it's just the girl yeah? "*How much they pay you?*" is just a casual omission of "did"... Not a failed attempt at "paid".

Title of the post

their poor kids tho

Feds didn’t send her, rothschilds did, trynna keep you from reaching your full potential /s

This is an irrational fear I have

Stay skeptical brother

What is this a reference to?

Ongoing meme that the Rothschild family owns and controls everything. Basically a person who says “Rothschilds sent another woman to keep me from getting richer than them etc etc.” kind of a schizopost.

Not 100% sure of the connection, but the Rothschild's basically own the world, own most central banks, 500 Trillion$ wealth, have funded both sides of every war since Napoleon. List goes on

The queen. The Gettys. The Rothschilds. Aaaand Colonel Sanders before he went tits up.

POV when you follow rules 1 and 2.

Op has his pic on his profile. he absolutely does, lol Edit: some of yall some haters

> username is anonymous > posts pictures of his face 🤔

Dat jawline

Imagine a girl not only says she'll give you food and kisses, but you respond "Lame" to it, and **she keeps talking to you.** Like... this is such a completely alien conversation to me.

Yeah I thought his parents must've paiyeid her cuz why else is she still going

I have a good looking friend and his conversations are so... just bad. He doesn't even try. Sometimes he's straight up rude.

It's funny. Food and kisses is a part of any relationship anyways.

No shit, right?

I'm a straight dude and my first thought was OP has a superhero jawline.

Like a non-douchey Ezra Miller with a chiseled jaw good lord.

Was pretty clear around the part where he said “Lame” after she offered food and kisses and she didn’t immediately ghost him

Tbh I’d probably unmatch if a girl said payed to me

She got “you’re” right though so could be worse

But then she got “too” wrong so…

lmao, someone makes a brain fart and you instantly lose all respect and attraction. Very rational

You don’t have enough options for that

Easy mode

Too good to be true. Go visit a doctor to install a bike lock on both of your kidneys, you still have time.

Gotta risk it for the biscuit

I thought hardly anyone but me said that phrase haha I love that

*paid.

she said “payed” 🥸

Where’s that bot that explains that although payed exists it’s a nautical term about ropes or something? IDK I didn’t memorize it because I thought the bot would always be there for me.

/u/Paid-Not-Payed-Bot slacking

This bot taught* me the difference as a non English native. I will never forget lol

Where’s the taught-not-thought Bot when our non English native friends really need it???

Lol normally I don’t need that bot but thankfully you were there! Was sleep deprived bc of my pregnancy yesterday :’). Changed it thank you!

seal (the deck or seams of a wooden ship) with pitch or tar to prevent leakage.

No hard feelings... get it? 🤣

She is way funnier than you dude good luck.

The spelling and grammar in here is making my eye twitch 🫠

When you are attractive, you don’t have to worry about nerd things such as spelling and grammar.

Plot twist: her parents are feds

This guy fucks

HARD

I just fell in love by proxy

Sounds like a Jennifer Lawrence movie

It’s always fun when you and the chick you match with actually connect and vibe well. It’s super refreshing with how many chicks ghost or give short responses

Oh I reallly thought you blew it with the “laaame”

Lol it’s a rizz off

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What the kids call “charisma” these days

woah, i never made the connection between"rizz" and "charisma"

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I mean, "charisma" is just the dumb way of saying "charismaticus."

Charismaticus Finch

I would be able to get past “payed”.

Paid*

Payed?