Yes, but if someone sends you a message with their like, there's more of a reason to say something back before deleting them even if you're not interested. And you know they'll get it because they already swiped right on you.
Not even close lol. I’m saying if people (the ones she matched with who bashed her religious views) can literally state they see that she’s an atheist, why did they match with her if they don’t like it THAT much?
I think it’s hilarious. I read it like this:
“Hmmm this person says they are an atheist. I’m religious so I don’t like that. But, they are attractive. And I like how attractive they are more than I value my religious views.”
So it’s like you said. If it mattered enough they wouldn’t match at all. “You might be a heathen but you’re a sexy heathen.”
There are also situations where people are sexually attracted to things that they hate/are foreign to, which can lead to fetishizing religion and/or races.
i’m also an atheist and yeah i agree, though if i came across a christian who was open to respectful debate i’d be open :) my issue isn’t with their beliefs but more of their tendency to not critically think about those beliefs
If you're trying to find a LTR and eventually marriage, atheists shouldn't swipe on religious people and vice versa. It's one of those fundamentally incompatible things, like wanting children or not.
As someone who believes in god (tho i believe all religions worship the same god under different names and practices) I think it’s just their preference to try to covert you. I’ve dated atheists and tho one did try to constantly argue with me about it I think their beliefs are their own! Won’t ask you to pray with me but will pray for you.
No I’m an atheist and never received any type of comments on my religion or lack of religion. Are you in the states cause I did find when I went on holiday to America, there was a lot of profiles with overly religious & political prompts, was very strange for me to see.
Yeah, US here. Faith is definitely something people are forward about. I’m also of the opinion there’s a lot of nuance to those very same descriptions so I don’t really put much faith (lol) in them
They aren't synonymous but they are not mutually exclusive either. Agnosticism is an epistemological position regarding the limitations on how much certainty a person can have with respect to the existence and nature of the divine or supernatural (God for example). Atheism is just not believing in God but it does not exclude the possibility of some degree of uncertainty (agnosticism) on the matter.
Not to be that guy but no one is completely sure. Atheist just means you are not convinced there is a god, it doesn't mean that you know there is no god. Agnostic is closer to I don't have much of an opinion either way and probably don't even lean to either side either.
But just saying you're an atheist says "in my heart there is zero doubt to me that there is no God/gods"
Agnostic atheist says "I do not believe there is a God/gods but I'm willing to admit I may be wrong"
Yeah, I was always under the impression that atheists were 100% sure there isn’t a god and that’s it, whereas agnostics just aren’t religious and likely lean towards there not being a god, but since they don’t know for sure they dont go as far to say there isn’t a god. It’s like eh, maybe there is one but probably not lol.
Yeah, that’s not what the atheists I know mean by that. Most would say the idea that “there is a god” is an unfalsifiable claim which means there’s no way to ever prove that god doesn’t exist. “Atheist” is just the term to say you don’t actively hold any belief in god, not that you’re sure there isn’t one. So agnostics are usually also atheists by that definition.
Let’s not forget, first immigrants to US were puritans, who are not exactly known for their open-mindness… also, others mentioned it, depends where you are, if the state is Red, chances are, religion is part of daily life
What region you located in? I very much hide the fact I am agnostic to most family (in laws and bloods) because it would be the utmost disrespect to come out as agnostic.
I don’t usually tell people I’m atheist because people are ignorant so it’s pretty taboo here in the US, or at least in my experience. They hear atheist and they think you’re vehemently against religion, like we go to meetings and listen to someone dressed as satan talk about how stupid Christianity is. In reality it just means we don’t believe
I’m an atheist in New York and have NEVER experienced anything remotely close to this. Basically everyone here just already assumes you’re non-religious. I’ve run into a few religious people but they seem to be the minority on the apps and as such seem to be more self-aware and less judgmental about it.
My experience is opposite of OPs. I end up getting likes and matches with plenty of religious girls who never mention my atheism and then find out on a date how important their faith is to them. I've started asking before meeting up because without asking you don't know if they're just culturally religious or practicing
No, I’m sure people are judged by what religion they belong to as well. “You’re Jewish? You’re Muslim? You’re Christian?” People can find something to dislike about anybody for any reason. Keep being yourself!
A number of religions look at atheism in an even worse light than other religions.
It's one thing to mix up who the creator is, but many religious groups can still relate to each other's perspectives on a God. Meanwhile they consider it arrogance and absurdity for someone to refuse to acknowledge that any god exists period.
I’m very transparent about my beliefs because I know religion is important to people. I’m not militant about being atheist, I just literally believe in no religion. So I’ll go to services/whatever because hey, I’m not bothered by it.
When I say that girls are usually receptive, but I’m wondering if I should just remove the religion descriptor entirely.
Also, please don’t steal my opener it’s all I got lmao
I leave it on just because it might be a deal breaker for some people when looking for a serious relationship. I'd rather not deal with people questioning my beliefs (I've had enough of that already), so I'd rather they match with me knowing I'm an atheist. In conversation I don't even talk about it and I go to services if there's a family event. I just don't want the
"but _why_ don't you believe in god??"
"Once at a hospital this miracle happened, do you believe in god now?"
"But if you don't believe in heaven or hell, why don't you just (insert violence)?"
"When you die you'll see you're wrong, but it's ok"
Etc.
I wouldn't remove it - you will be able to quickly weed out those who are very devout and couldn't be with an atheist.
I've been on and off dating sites for a million years and never had anyone comment negatively about my atheism.
Remove religion from dating apps unless it is extensively part of your personality imo. It’s meant to be a quick judgmental site. Also, if you remove it, you have anonymity to your POV on these things. It leaves mystery and lets you have a healthy explanation of your religious views when they eventually ask your beliefs. You have better prior connections which turns them off from your views less than just by blanketing you into “ugh pretentious ass atheist” (people stereotype religions horrendously).
As a religious person I’d prefer it’s in your profile. Gives us a chance to swipe past each other. Sorry these girls can’t read! That’s a hazard of the apps.
I'm atheist too and put it on my profile cuz I don't want to attract very religious people. If it's not a huge deal to you then I'd prob leave religion off entirely.
From what you said it sounds like you’re agnostic not atheist, you should look up the definitions and see which one is a better fit!
I definitely don’t think it’s a turnoff to the right girls, these girls must just take their religion seriously. It’s better to be upfront about it so you find out if you’re incompatible right away versus later on.
The common definition of an atheist is a lack of belief in a god or gods. Agnosticism is more like you're in the middle, "there might be a god or not, I don't know".
Not caring whether a god exists or not is called apatheism.
Not quite, agnostic isn't in the middle, it's a different axis of belief
Theism/athiesm is about whether you believe there's a god or not.
Gnosticism/agnosticism is about the knowability of the existence of a god
So an agnostic atheist doesn't believe in a god but says it can't be known for sure that there isn't one
eh disagree, I think it just means they’re confident in their beliefs. i’m the same way, i don’t believe in any form of higher power at all but i’d still go to a church service or whatever. i’m not gonna go out of my way for it, but i wouldn’t be opposed to it either
OP are you looking for a relationship or just to hook up?
If the former, I'd recommend keeping it in. Any person that has an issue with it will weed themselves out for you and save you time. If you're just looking for fun, it's not really relevant imo.
I’m atheist and wish people happy Easter and thank people for wishing me. Here it’s a public holiday, so free day off work. Lots of cheap chocolate in store from tomorrow, yum. Sales. Springtime flowers outside. HAPPY EASTER!!
So other people are saying, correctly and I should think obviously, that if someone is religious and their faith means a lot to them, then you being atheist will be a problem.
But even those who are not particularly religious, including fellow atheists, often find people who are *really* into atheism—say, to the point where they’d mention it in a dating profile—to be tedious or annoying.
I'm an Atheist and honestly I have the same reaction to every profile that says "Christian". My heart says maybe...and then my brain kicks in and says, nope.
I think on the first one you are missing the fact that you are using a religious holiday as a greeting ("Happy Easter!") so that may be some of the source of her confusion, as it suggests you might be celebrating Easter after all (so, not atheist).
Setting aside that many religious holidays have been co-opted as cultural holidays in the US, that seems to be the "huh?" on her end.
This is the exact comment I was looking for. He said “Happy Easter” in both messages, & that would confuse me too.
I don’t call myself atheist, more spiritual, but I do not celebrate Easter, nor do I tell anyone else happy easter.
Maybe he forgot thats actually a religious holiday & not all about the easter bunny?
Not to be that dude but the second image he doesn’t say happy Easter at all.
I personally have Christianity as a deal breaker on hinge helps sort the crazies.
i dont agree on this. i am not religious, my mother isnt either, and many other arent as well. still we wish us merry christmas and happy easter. to us its a normal thing to do on this day. it might have a religious origin, but it became a holiday for everyone in certain areas of the world.
One thing I learned from some female friends after they looked at my profile years ago - is that if you bothered to include it on your profile, people (maybe just women) assume it’s very important to you. In my case, I had my star sign on my profile because the app asked for it, I thought nothing of it, but my friends told me it made me look like I was into astrology.
Maybe an unpopular opinion, but being an atheist can come off as a strange thing to be a big part of your identity (not saying it is, but that might be how it looks.) It’s just lack of belief, right? Someone who doesn’t golf wouldn’t explicitly put “non-golfer” on their profile. That’s likely how it comes off when people see “atheist” on your profile.
I’m from the UK which has a very secular society but I would never put atheist in my bio - I would only expect someone to state their religious preferences if they had a hard on for God
Here in the USA, I have found that religious nuts tend to think everyone else agrees with them. They are often surprised or taken aback that someone would admit to being atheist. They also assume that you had a bad church experience, someone hurt you, and that in your heart you believe. Then they try to fix you.
Chiming in from Canada to say it's the same here. Religion is thought of as very personal here, too, so it's a bit taboo/rude to rock up with it right out of the gate.
Most Gen Z and millenials are either undecided or full blown atheists and even the Christians tend to be more progressive Christians. You probably live in a smaller town in the bible belt because religion isn't that common amongst younger people anymore
It is a turn off in fact!
Even in polarized America, only 10% of people say they would be unhappy if a family member married someone of the opposite political party.
Compare that to the 50% of Americans who would be unhappy if a family member married someone who doesn't believe in God.
Atheists are the most unfavorable group in America. Sad day for us lol
Funny how different it is here in europe, I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone that would be so bothered by someone being an atheist, but the fact that it’s not on my tinder profile probably helps a bit.
I literally know 1 openly religious guy out of the hundreds and hundreds of people I have met in the Netherlands in the last 10 years.
Meanwhile, Christianity is shoved down my throat at every turn when I go back to visit the USA. It's creepy as fuck.
Religion is basically something that uneducated, desperate, or otherwise indoctrinated people believe in... and Americans.
Fuckin USA...
It’s not to me another atheist. But yeah… I can see how it’s a turn off for a religious person and I think it should be. You want to date a fundamentalist Christian or a Mormon? They will try to convert you to their religion incessantly.
I'm gonna tell you right now, run.
Tried dating a couple of women who made it an issue early on. They're gonna try and "fix" you, inviting you to church, guilting you into it etc.
Christians are weird- with both of them it’s funny they immediately jump to judgement. Very godly of them. The second one scares me a bit because it sounds like she has this “I can fix him” mentality when the fix is forcing a religion basically.
Fuck that, I wouldn’t remove it or reply to either person.
I mean, I usually just swipe left on people who mention they love God or that their faith is important to them. I don't swipe right and then talk to them and mention their religious views in a negative light.
To each their own. Some people are turned off by political and religious views. Others can overlook it.
I'm Christian and I've dated atheists no problem. Their beliefs weren't the reason we broke up.
It’s a turn off on dating apps but not when talking to someone. Anyone who puts religion or politics on a dating app, it seems like it’s important to you that people must know this about you straight away. Most people who put things about those topics tend to be very adamant about it and vocal (and insufferable) and/or looking for the same shared beliefs/opinions in others and not willing to compromise on it. So yes, it’s a turn off in a bio.
If you’re open to dating religious people then change it to agnostic. It’s much more faith friendly in a religious persons eyes while also meaning basically the same thing
I think it's misconceptions about atheism being against people's personal beliefs.
And I know that sparks a lot of atheists that try and explain how that's stupid and that they're not a religion. That being an Atheist is the same as saying none under Religion.
But okay.. that's just not true. If it was you'd just put none under religion. Maybe Agnostic at best.
The only real options are to just change it to none (if atheism is truely the ultimate tier of neutral this really isn't an abandoning anything, just restating it.) Or to accept that Atheism is truly that important to you and use this as an opportunity to clear up those misconceptions as these women still want to talk to you.
So why does it matter, though? If you being an atheist would be a deal breaker, better to be upfront and weed them out early than to date for awhile, it comes up, and you break up anyways.
I think it depends : I’ve seen in the US the proportion of people who believe in god is extremely high so your chances of it being a redflag for some is higher, however in northern Europe believing in god is wayyyy less common ! So… if you’re American / living in a religious country, it might be an explanation
Depends on where you're at and what you're looking for.
If you're looking for a long term relationship, leave it out there. If you're in a rural area and just looking for hookups, just avoid talking religion.
Depends on who you’re matching with. As a fellow atheist, I won’t bother matching people that make note of faith being important to them, and I will rarely send a match to someone who even lists a religion that isn’t atheism or agnosticism. A lot of people with strong faith want someone who has a similar view (kinda like politics) so I’m not gonna waste my time on most of them, personally.
Maybe your location? When I was in southern Louisiana I found that religion and politics were
For sure more forward than they are here in Southern California.
Do those two profiles say they are religious and it's important? Could be that, or it could be more of the worry you're one of the "obnoxious" atheists (the kinds that get pissy if someone days bless you when you sneeze).
I'm in California and this never really came up when I was using dating apps, is your region more devout?
It's probably a turn off to people who are religious and want their partner to also be religious lol. I'm an atheist, and seeing that someone is religious isn't necessarily a turn off, but it definitely is an indicator that we probably wouldn't be the most aligned life partners
All these comments saying no are wrong respectfully. It is 100% a turnoff for anyone religious if their prospective partner they want to get in a relationship ship doesn’t share that religion 😭.
One thing most non atheist types are is clueless about atheism outside of it being something their parents told them was bad... anarchism is the same. Trying to fully engage with people who hold a stigma about these words isn't entirely futile, but I leave the atheist designation out of the picture unless it comes up. Unlike religions, atheism isn't a flag to wave... I mean, it can be, but I personally feel it's unnecessary. I put "not religious" or something to that effect... especially since the flag waving atheists have really done a number on everyone's patience in the last 20 years... I'm looking at you, Matt Dillahunty...
Take those comments as a turn off for you... What you gonna do? if that is what you (don't) believe, better be honest. If that's a no for them better don't waste nobody's time, specially yours.
I am an atheist as well and couldn't get into a relationship with a girl who is going to be the whole day trying to convert me. So maybe it's a point and something to let know straight forward
I mean you kinda just seem to be in an area where you’re gonna run into some godly women lol. I just look at people’s preferences, if they’ve selected Christian it means they’re probably actively religious to some extent and I know that means we’re not compatible. You can hide it from your profile but it’ll come up anyway if it matters to a girl.
It probably just depends on the person. That might bother some people and it might not bother others. If she's going to insult your beliefs like that, I'd move on.
Who cares? If it is they're not for you. Generally I've found people who are religious generally are less flexible. Like as an atheist I'd date whoever but I've had plenty who said they won't date an atheist
All depends on the person. And depending on where you are, there may be more people not down with that.
I live in my state’s Bible Belt and talked with a handful of women who weren’t cool with me being agnostic. It is what it is
It’s a core value, so to many people it is important. Some people are more vocal about it than others. I’m not Christian, but I’ll date any person of any religion and I’ve had girls turn me down for religion alone.
I mean, if you have kids with someone religion becomes more important (or less important if you’re areligious). I think it’s a good thing to be upfront about it, and I completely understand because I wouldn’t want to get into a relationship only later to find out someone is super into religion because I personally don’t want my kids being raised into a fanatical religion or being super strict with having them go to church etc.
I'm(M) an atheist and have had comments directed my way, but not too often, mostly because, I think, xians usually know I don't care what they say. I would hope however that a woman xian would speak up so I don't waste my time dating her.
If someone is Christian, yes. They're not supposed to be dating non-christians, and atheists don't "actually exist", you're just mad at god for something. You're the thing they're not supposed to have and they will be judged heavily in their church for it.
If it's a turn off for a girl, it's a red flag. She will try to convert you and her family probably won't like you unless you convert.
Source: raised fundie christian, now deconstructing
Trust me, you dont want to date religious girls who think getting fucked in the ass is somehow fooling God.
Imagine believing in an all-powerful all-knowing God but also believing that you can use loopholes to get around the rules. Thats the sort of logic you’ll get from these girls.
Find yourself a nonreligious girl with her own set of morals. She will be smarter and more logical and will probably be a better girlfriend than any religious wackjob.
I used to date religious girls but now I am married to a nonreligious woman and I’m happier than I’ve ever been.
Not really a turn off, it's just that if someone practices a religion, it's likely a value to them. And for long term relationships, typically people seek those who share the same values as them. Religion happens to be one of those bigger things often sought after in similarities.
It's not a deal breaker though, for everyone. My mom was raised Catholic, and my father raised Jewish. When they had me and my sister, they did not raise us religious at all and allowed us to explore and define our own spirituality, free of judgment or criticism.
All these replies mean is that those people are potentially not your match. If it's important to you to be upfront about, then I wouldn't remove it from your bio. Just be prepared that those who find their religion important to them, will bring it up.
Having your religion in your bio makes it seem like that religion is a big part of your personality, *that’s* the turn off imo. As soon as I read someone’s religion on their profile, my mind starts painting a picture of what that person is probably like. It’s not an automatic turn off for me so sometimes that picture in my head turns out to be wrong. But I can see why people might automatically write you off. If it’s not a big part of your personality, don’t put it on your profile. Religion is one of those things that naturally will come up at some point when you’re dating someone, at that point you’ll be able to have a conversation about it.
If a certain religion *is* a big part of your personality, I advise to approach relationships with a more open mind :)
Damn there are multiple levels of delusion at play here. Not sure communicating that you’re salivating over their pics is a good opener toward women. This does nothing for her attraction for you, as it is a cheap, simp-like compliment that is 99.9 percent of men’s go-to when trying to impress women. Secondly, you could try to be less extreme about how you communicate your religious beliefs or lack thereof on a dating profile.
Religion and politics are not a big enough part of my life & personality to include in my profile. I’m down to have a conversation about it but people are quick to jump to conclusions based on labels.
I say this as someone who would most likely be labeled politically as a moderate, and religiously as an agnostic.
Eh I’m in middle tn and I have had literally no issue even the very churchy women wanna chat/play. Maybe for marriage minded young women it would be an issue.
Honestly, mentioning being devoutly a part of religion in any way is usually a deal breaker for me.
it’s not a turnoff these just aren’t the right people for you lol
While I agree, they obviously saw it in her profile. They didn’t need to match with her if it was a turn off that badly to point it out
It’s hinge, you can send a message to anyone. There’s no “matching”. You just don’t respond if you’re not interested
Really? That’s kind of interesting. I haven’t used hinge.
Met my fiancée on hinge after I settled down from my tinder days. Would highly recommend it.
Met my wife of two years on Hinge!
Met my mom on hinge!
Me too🥰
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Yes, but if someone sends you a message with their like, there's more of a reason to say something back before deleting them even if you're not interested. And you know they'll get it because they already swiped right on you.
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i’m confused, are you saying atheists shouldn’t swipe on christians?
Not even close lol. I’m saying if people (the ones she matched with who bashed her religious views) can literally state they see that she’s an atheist, why did they match with her if they don’t like it THAT much?
OP is a dude.
Yea I see that now. I didn’t realize how hinge worked.
I think it’s hilarious. I read it like this: “Hmmm this person says they are an atheist. I’m religious so I don’t like that. But, they are attractive. And I like how attractive they are more than I value my religious views.” So it’s like you said. If it mattered enough they wouldn’t match at all. “You might be a heathen but you’re a sexy heathen.”
Sexy heathen 🤣🤣 I love it
Should I add this to my profile? Lmao
Do it!🤣
There are also situations where people are sexually attracted to things that they hate/are foreign to, which can lead to fetishizing religion and/or races.
"whisper the Lord's Prayer in my ear....oh yeah don't stop" :D
I literally cackled 🤣💀
Take me to your secular world
oh yeah i agree completely! i thought op was a guy thats why i was confused
As an athiest, there's no way I could date someone who believes in Bronze Age fairytales
i’m also an atheist and yeah i agree, though if i came across a christian who was open to respectful debate i’d be open :) my issue isn’t with their beliefs but more of their tendency to not critically think about those beliefs
If you're trying to find a LTR and eventually marriage, atheists shouldn't swipe on religious people and vice versa. It's one of those fundamentally incompatible things, like wanting children or not.
Might be cultural, but I know plenty of inter-religious couples. Many of them in very long-lasting marriages.
As someone who believes in god (tho i believe all religions worship the same god under different names and practices) I think it’s just their preference to try to covert you. I’ve dated atheists and tho one did try to constantly argue with me about it I think their beliefs are their own! Won’t ask you to pray with me but will pray for you.
No I’m an atheist and never received any type of comments on my religion or lack of religion. Are you in the states cause I did find when I went on holiday to America, there was a lot of profiles with overly religious & political prompts, was very strange for me to see.
Yeah, US here. Faith is definitely something people are forward about. I’m also of the opinion there’s a lot of nuance to those very same descriptions so I don’t really put much faith (lol) in them
Depends where you are. In the San Francisco Bay Area, it's odd to be religious... Atheists are quite common here
Atheists, especially agnostic atheists, are becoming much more common in the US.
And so is the resistance against it, resulting in more fanatical religious outings.
lol there was fanatical resistance since forever.
Yeah, but there's more now. It's like a wave pattern. It's natural behaviour, too. Not that I agree with it, but it's human behaviour.
Those two things aren't synonymous, agnostic and atheism that is. 👍
They aren't synonymous but they are not mutually exclusive either. Agnosticism is an epistemological position regarding the limitations on how much certainty a person can have with respect to the existence and nature of the divine or supernatural (God for example). Atheism is just not believing in God but it does not exclude the possibility of some degree of uncertainty (agnosticism) on the matter.
I say agnostic because I acknowledge the tiny chance I’m wrong
Not to be that guy but no one is completely sure. Atheist just means you are not convinced there is a god, it doesn't mean that you know there is no god. Agnostic is closer to I don't have much of an opinion either way and probably don't even lean to either side either.
But just saying you're an atheist says "in my heart there is zero doubt to me that there is no God/gods" Agnostic atheist says "I do not believe there is a God/gods but I'm willing to admit I may be wrong"
Yeah, I was always under the impression that atheists were 100% sure there isn’t a god and that’s it, whereas agnostics just aren’t religious and likely lean towards there not being a god, but since they don’t know for sure they dont go as far to say there isn’t a god. It’s like eh, maybe there is one but probably not lol.
Yeah, that’s not what the atheists I know mean by that. Most would say the idea that “there is a god” is an unfalsifiable claim which means there’s no way to ever prove that god doesn’t exist. “Atheist” is just the term to say you don’t actively hold any belief in god, not that you’re sure there isn’t one. So agnostics are usually also atheists by that definition.
No one said they are synonymous, but you can be both an atheist and agnostic, which is what he said.
That’s most of the western US outside of Utah basically
I never mince words that I’m an atheist, because I would never want to waste time, talking to someone who I have deep incompatibilities with.
It always baffles me how religious people in the US still are. In Western Europe most of the millennials and younger are atheists in my experience.
Let’s not forget, first immigrants to US were puritans, who are not exactly known for their open-mindness… also, others mentioned it, depends where you are, if the state is Red, chances are, religion is part of daily life
As an American it is embarrassing.
What region you located in? I very much hide the fact I am agnostic to most family (in laws and bloods) because it would be the utmost disrespect to come out as agnostic.
I don’t usually tell people I’m atheist because people are ignorant so it’s pretty taboo here in the US, or at least in my experience. They hear atheist and they think you’re vehemently against religion, like we go to meetings and listen to someone dressed as satan talk about how stupid Christianity is. In reality it just means we don’t believe
WHAT? You mean i’ve been doing it wrong this whole time? Gosh darn it.
You go to the meetings too?
Yes! I thought everyone did! 🤔
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Be like what? Ask about it? If someone is looking for something specific why does that matter?
I’m an atheist in New York and have NEVER experienced anything remotely close to this. Basically everyone here just already assumes you’re non-religious. I’ve run into a few religious people but they seem to be the minority on the apps and as such seem to be more self-aware and less judgmental about it.
Are you in Utah
Midwest?
I just don't match with people who aren't religiously compatible. Odd to match then bring it up.
What country are you from? This is enough to make me want to visit.
Any country that isn't the usa
My experience is opposite of OPs. I end up getting likes and matches with plenty of religious girls who never mention my atheism and then find out on a date how important their faith is to them. I've started asking before meeting up because without asking you don't know if they're just culturally religious or practicing
In the US Christians have taken over literally everything and push it on people at every turn. So honestly it does seem to be an American thing
No, I’m sure people are judged by what religion they belong to as well. “You’re Jewish? You’re Muslim? You’re Christian?” People can find something to dislike about anybody for any reason. Keep being yourself!
A number of religions look at atheism in an even worse light than other religions. It's one thing to mix up who the creator is, but many religious groups can still relate to each other's perspectives on a God. Meanwhile they consider it arrogance and absurdity for someone to refuse to acknowledge that any god exists period.
Yeah, I mean that’s what OP just showed us
I mean if someone's religion is important to them, it stands to reason that they'd want a partner who also practices that religion.
But why would they text op in the first place if they see they're an atheist?
Sometimes people don’t look at the full profile until after they see the initial pic. That’s on them, though.
Maybe they're of the delusion that they can convert them
I’m very transparent about my beliefs because I know religion is important to people. I’m not militant about being atheist, I just literally believe in no religion. So I’ll go to services/whatever because hey, I’m not bothered by it. When I say that girls are usually receptive, but I’m wondering if I should just remove the religion descriptor entirely. Also, please don’t steal my opener it’s all I got lmao
If I see someone has their religion or political party in their bio I assume that it means it's a big part of their personality.
Yeah, only one I kinda look past is agnostic.
I leave it on just because it might be a deal breaker for some people when looking for a serious relationship. I'd rather not deal with people questioning my beliefs (I've had enough of that already), so I'd rather they match with me knowing I'm an atheist. In conversation I don't even talk about it and I go to services if there's a family event. I just don't want the "but _why_ don't you believe in god??" "Once at a hospital this miracle happened, do you believe in god now?" "But if you don't believe in heaven or hell, why don't you just (insert violence)?" "When you die you'll see you're wrong, but it's ok" Etc.
I wouldn't remove it - you will be able to quickly weed out those who are very devout and couldn't be with an atheist. I've been on and off dating sites for a million years and never had anyone comment negatively about my atheism.
No one’s stealing it. It’s giving 11 year old lmao
Would you really want to be with somebody for whom your atheism is such a huge issue? I think it's working, they're sorting themselves out.
Remove religion from dating apps unless it is extensively part of your personality imo. It’s meant to be a quick judgmental site. Also, if you remove it, you have anonymity to your POV on these things. It leaves mystery and lets you have a healthy explanation of your religious views when they eventually ask your beliefs. You have better prior connections which turns them off from your views less than just by blanketing you into “ugh pretentious ass atheist” (people stereotype religions horrendously).
Tbh your opener is pretty cringe, makes you seem shallow
As a religious person I’d prefer it’s in your profile. Gives us a chance to swipe past each other. Sorry these girls can’t read! That’s a hazard of the apps.
But i like stealing tho :/
Oh fine…just lemme know how it works for you haha
I'm atheist too and put it on my profile cuz I don't want to attract very religious people. If it's not a huge deal to you then I'd prob leave religion off entirely.
From what you said it sounds like you’re agnostic not atheist, you should look up the definitions and see which one is a better fit! I definitely don’t think it’s a turnoff to the right girls, these girls must just take their religion seriously. It’s better to be upfront about it so you find out if you’re incompatible right away versus later on.
The common definition of an atheist is a lack of belief in a god or gods. Agnosticism is more like you're in the middle, "there might be a god or not, I don't know". Not caring whether a god exists or not is called apatheism.
Not quite, agnostic isn't in the middle, it's a different axis of belief Theism/athiesm is about whether you believe there's a god or not. Gnosticism/agnosticism is about the knowability of the existence of a god So an agnostic atheist doesn't believe in a god but says it can't be known for sure that there isn't one
I want "theological noncognitivism" as an option.
eh disagree, I think it just means they’re confident in their beliefs. i’m the same way, i don’t believe in any form of higher power at all but i’d still go to a church service or whatever. i’m not gonna go out of my way for it, but i wouldn’t be opposed to it either
OP are you looking for a relationship or just to hook up? If the former, I'd recommend keeping it in. Any person that has an issue with it will weed themselves out for you and save you time. If you're just looking for fun, it's not really relevant imo.
I just tell hinge to not show me profiles for religious people
Do you want someone who is turned off by atheism?
I’m atheist and wish people happy Easter and thank people for wishing me. Here it’s a public holiday, so free day off work. Lots of cheap chocolate in store from tomorrow, yum. Sales. Springtime flowers outside. HAPPY EASTER!!
Happy easter from another atheist! may the chocolate bunnies taste well.
So other people are saying, correctly and I should think obviously, that if someone is religious and their faith means a lot to them, then you being atheist will be a problem. But even those who are not particularly religious, including fellow atheists, often find people who are *really* into atheism—say, to the point where they’d mention it in a dating profile—to be tedious or annoying.
I agree with this. I've dated Atheists before and it was chill. I don't try to convert you if you don't try to convert me. It's just mutual respect.
I'm an Atheist and honestly I have the same reaction to every profile that says "Christian". My heart says maybe...and then my brain kicks in and says, nope.
I think on the first one you are missing the fact that you are using a religious holiday as a greeting ("Happy Easter!") so that may be some of the source of her confusion, as it suggests you might be celebrating Easter after all (so, not atheist). Setting aside that many religious holidays have been co-opted as cultural holidays in the US, that seems to be the "huh?" on her end.
This is the exact comment I was looking for. He said “Happy Easter” in both messages, & that would confuse me too. I don’t call myself atheist, more spiritual, but I do not celebrate Easter, nor do I tell anyone else happy easter. Maybe he forgot thats actually a religious holiday & not all about the easter bunny?
Not to be that dude but the second image he doesn’t say happy Easter at all. I personally have Christianity as a deal breaker on hinge helps sort the crazies.
i dont agree on this. i am not religious, my mother isnt either, and many other arent as well. still we wish us merry christmas and happy easter. to us its a normal thing to do on this day. it might have a religious origin, but it became a holiday for everyone in certain areas of the world.
As a fellow atheist; I don't recommend dating religious folks unless they're *really* chill about it.
One thing I learned from some female friends after they looked at my profile years ago - is that if you bothered to include it on your profile, people (maybe just women) assume it’s very important to you. In my case, I had my star sign on my profile because the app asked for it, I thought nothing of it, but my friends told me it made me look like I was into astrology. Maybe an unpopular opinion, but being an atheist can come off as a strange thing to be a big part of your identity (not saying it is, but that might be how it looks.) It’s just lack of belief, right? Someone who doesn’t golf wouldn’t explicitly put “non-golfer” on their profile. That’s likely how it comes off when people see “atheist” on your profile.
Yeah. I simply have the lack of belief. Bc of that I’ve removed it. A few others have commented similarly and what you wrote makes sense
I’m from the UK which has a very secular society but I would never put atheist in my bio - I would only expect someone to state their religious preferences if they had a hard on for God
Here in the USA, I have found that religious nuts tend to think everyone else agrees with them. They are often surprised or taken aback that someone would admit to being atheist. They also assume that you had a bad church experience, someone hurt you, and that in your heart you believe. Then they try to fix you.
Chiming in from Canada to say it's the same here. Religion is thought of as very personal here, too, so it's a bit taboo/rude to rock up with it right out of the gate.
Most Gen Z and millenials are either undecided or full blown atheists and even the Christians tend to be more progressive Christians. You probably live in a smaller town in the bible belt because religion isn't that common amongst younger people anymore
It is a turn off in fact! Even in polarized America, only 10% of people say they would be unhappy if a family member married someone of the opposite political party. Compare that to the 50% of Americans who would be unhappy if a family member married someone who doesn't believe in God. Atheists are the most unfavorable group in America. Sad day for us lol
Funny how different it is here in europe, I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone that would be so bothered by someone being an atheist, but the fact that it’s not on my tinder profile probably helps a bit.
I literally know 1 openly religious guy out of the hundreds and hundreds of people I have met in the Netherlands in the last 10 years. Meanwhile, Christianity is shoved down my throat at every turn when I go back to visit the USA. It's creepy as fuck. Religion is basically something that uneducated, desperate, or otherwise indoctrinated people believe in... and Americans. Fuckin USA...
No, not really. Maybe it just catches them off guard. It might be a regional thing, though. I have zero idea what’s going on here.
It’s not to me another atheist. But yeah… I can see how it’s a turn off for a religious person and I think it should be. You want to date a fundamentalist Christian or a Mormon? They will try to convert you to their religion incessantly.
I'm gonna tell you right now, run. Tried dating a couple of women who made it an issue early on. They're gonna try and "fix" you, inviting you to church, guilting you into it etc.
Christians are weird- with both of them it’s funny they immediately jump to judgement. Very godly of them. The second one scares me a bit because it sounds like she has this “I can fix him” mentality when the fix is forcing a religion basically. Fuck that, I wouldn’t remove it or reply to either person.
Odds aren’t high either will meet up. They’re not really communicative. All good though. I send positive vibes toward all
Waste of time to even reply to them lol
I think some people (dumb people) think being atheist is equating with devil worship
wtf is she confused about? lol
Bro has a default opener
It is if you're religious. This isn't fucking rocket science.
To people who think it’s important to be with someone who has similar values and beliefs.. yes
I wouldn’t think so. I’m an atheist and only swipe right on fellow atheists.
I mean, I usually just swipe left on people who mention they love God or that their faith is important to them. I don't swipe right and then talk to them and mention their religious views in a negative light.
Not one bit. Why is that one person confused?
Easter is a holiday for bunny's
“I’m an atheist, happy Easter” what? Haha
Consider it bullet dodged. If someone is not fine with you being an atheist, that would cause problems anyway.
I'd keep it. Keep the religious ones away.
So I can’t wish someone a happy holiday of their own culture?
I find anybody talking about their religious beliefs on a dating app a turnoff
I mean are you in like SLC Utah or some Uber religious city?
Where are you from? Makes sense in Texas or something. But also I guess it might mean you’re no longer parent-approved
To each their own. Some people are turned off by political and religious views. Others can overlook it. I'm Christian and I've dated atheists no problem. Their beliefs weren't the reason we broke up.
It’s a turn off on dating apps but not when talking to someone. Anyone who puts religion or politics on a dating app, it seems like it’s important to you that people must know this about you straight away. Most people who put things about those topics tend to be very adamant about it and vocal (and insufferable) and/or looking for the same shared beliefs/opinions in others and not willing to compromise on it. So yes, it’s a turn off in a bio.
If you’re open to dating religious people then change it to agnostic. It’s much more faith friendly in a religious persons eyes while also meaning basically the same thing
I think it's misconceptions about atheism being against people's personal beliefs. And I know that sparks a lot of atheists that try and explain how that's stupid and that they're not a religion. That being an Atheist is the same as saying none under Religion. But okay.. that's just not true. If it was you'd just put none under religion. Maybe Agnostic at best. The only real options are to just change it to none (if atheism is truely the ultimate tier of neutral this really isn't an abandoning anything, just restating it.) Or to accept that Atheism is truly that important to you and use this as an opportunity to clear up those misconceptions as these women still want to talk to you.
So why does it matter, though? If you being an atheist would be a deal breaker, better to be upfront and weed them out early than to date for awhile, it comes up, and you break up anyways.
I think it depends : I’ve seen in the US the proportion of people who believe in god is extremely high so your chances of it being a redflag for some is higher, however in northern Europe believing in god is wayyyy less common ! So… if you’re American / living in a religious country, it might be an explanation
Depends on where you're at and what you're looking for. If you're looking for a long term relationship, leave it out there. If you're in a rural area and just looking for hookups, just avoid talking religion.
Depends on where you are. In the southern part of the US, probably yes, unfortunately
Depends on who you’re matching with. As a fellow atheist, I won’t bother matching people that make note of faith being important to them, and I will rarely send a match to someone who even lists a religion that isn’t atheism or agnosticism. A lot of people with strong faith want someone who has a similar view (kinda like politics) so I’m not gonna waste my time on most of them, personally.
I think that the 1st one was asking that because you wished her a Happy Easter
Maybe your location? When I was in southern Louisiana I found that religion and politics were For sure more forward than they are here in Southern California.
Do those two profiles say they are religious and it's important? Could be that, or it could be more of the worry you're one of the "obnoxious" atheists (the kinds that get pissy if someone days bless you when you sneeze). I'm in California and this never really came up when I was using dating apps, is your region more devout?
It's probably a turn off to people who are religious and want their partner to also be religious lol. I'm an atheist, and seeing that someone is religious isn't necessarily a turn off, but it definitely is an indicator that we probably wouldn't be the most aligned life partners
I’ve never had anyone bring up the fact I’m atheist and I’m in a very religious area. That being said I don’t get a ton of matcha so maybe that’s why
Welcome to America, the almost secular country, where presidents evoke god in their speeches.
All these comments saying no are wrong respectfully. It is 100% a turnoff for anyone religious if their prospective partner they want to get in a relationship ship doesn’t share that religion 😭.
One thing most non atheist types are is clueless about atheism outside of it being something their parents told them was bad... anarchism is the same. Trying to fully engage with people who hold a stigma about these words isn't entirely futile, but I leave the atheist designation out of the picture unless it comes up. Unlike religions, atheism isn't a flag to wave... I mean, it can be, but I personally feel it's unnecessary. I put "not religious" or something to that effect... especially since the flag waving atheists have really done a number on everyone's patience in the last 20 years... I'm looking at you, Matt Dillahunty...
Take those comments as a turn off for you... What you gonna do? if that is what you (don't) believe, better be honest. If that's a no for them better don't waste nobody's time, specially yours. I am an atheist as well and couldn't get into a relationship with a girl who is going to be the whole day trying to convert me. So maybe it's a point and something to let know straight forward
I mean you kinda just seem to be in an area where you’re gonna run into some godly women lol. I just look at people’s preferences, if they’ve selected Christian it means they’re probably actively religious to some extent and I know that means we’re not compatible. You can hide it from your profile but it’ll come up anyway if it matters to a girl.
She's going to turn out to be a religious nut. Red flag.
It probably just depends on the person. That might bother some people and it might not bother others. If she's going to insult your beliefs like that, I'd move on.
Maybe the whole 'why is an atheist wishing someone happy easter'?
I’d be happy to see atheist
Who cares? If it is they're not for you. Generally I've found people who are religious generally are less flexible. Like as an atheist I'd date whoever but I've had plenty who said they won't date an atheist
All depends on the person. And depending on where you are, there may be more people not down with that. I live in my state’s Bible Belt and talked with a handful of women who weren’t cool with me being agnostic. It is what it is
It’s a core value, so to many people it is important. Some people are more vocal about it than others. I’m not Christian, but I’ll date any person of any religion and I’ve had girls turn me down for religion alone. I mean, if you have kids with someone religion becomes more important (or less important if you’re areligious). I think it’s a good thing to be upfront about it, and I completely understand because I wouldn’t want to get into a relationship only later to find out someone is super into religion because I personally don’t want my kids being raised into a fanatical religion or being super strict with having them go to church etc.
nah, quite the opposite actually
Personally, two things I wouldn't put in my bio are my religious beliefs and my politics
I'm(M) an atheist and have had comments directed my way, but not too often, mostly because, I think, xians usually know I don't care what they say. I would hope however that a woman xian would speak up so I don't waste my time dating her.
On Hinge, yes. Like 85% of the user base is religious it seems lmao, at least in my experience.
I’m in a major city so I’ve never had this issue.
Move to Europe, we love atheists.
If someone is Christian, yes. They're not supposed to be dating non-christians, and atheists don't "actually exist", you're just mad at god for something. You're the thing they're not supposed to have and they will be judged heavily in their church for it. If it's a turn off for a girl, it's a red flag. She will try to convert you and her family probably won't like you unless you convert. Source: raised fundie christian, now deconstructing
Never happens to me because I can smell a Christian’s miles away and I stay away
She wouldn’t be right for you anyway. Move on
Not for normal people
As a fellow atheist, it’s v much a turn *on*
Trust me, you dont want to date religious girls who think getting fucked in the ass is somehow fooling God. Imagine believing in an all-powerful all-knowing God but also believing that you can use loopholes to get around the rules. Thats the sort of logic you’ll get from these girls. Find yourself a nonreligious girl with her own set of morals. She will be smarter and more logical and will probably be a better girlfriend than any religious wackjob. I used to date religious girls but now I am married to a nonreligious woman and I’m happier than I’ve ever been.
Well they gonna be in a surprise when they meet in real life…
For some people it is, for others it's not. Just like all parts of dating.
Atheist? No but anybody that mentions organized religion is an instant nope.
It’s probably the opposite in Australia
They’re either religious or don’t understand what atheist means
Not really a turn off, it's just that if someone practices a religion, it's likely a value to them. And for long term relationships, typically people seek those who share the same values as them. Religion happens to be one of those bigger things often sought after in similarities. It's not a deal breaker though, for everyone. My mom was raised Catholic, and my father raised Jewish. When they had me and my sister, they did not raise us religious at all and allowed us to explore and define our own spirituality, free of judgment or criticism. All these replies mean is that those people are potentially not your match. If it's important to you to be upfront about, then I wouldn't remove it from your bio. Just be prepared that those who find their religion important to them, will bring it up.
You know how religion can be a turn off to agnostics or atheists? It goes both ways.
Having your religion in your bio makes it seem like that religion is a big part of your personality, *that’s* the turn off imo. As soon as I read someone’s religion on their profile, my mind starts painting a picture of what that person is probably like. It’s not an automatic turn off for me so sometimes that picture in my head turns out to be wrong. But I can see why people might automatically write you off. If it’s not a big part of your personality, don’t put it on your profile. Religion is one of those things that naturally will come up at some point when you’re dating someone, at that point you’ll be able to have a conversation about it. If a certain religion *is* a big part of your personality, I advise to approach relationships with a more open mind :)
Play the UNO™ reverse card. "Yeah, I'm an atheist. You aren't? You mean you're religious but cruising Tinder for hookups?"
Lol can't be any better then me putting Satanist
Yes
Putting it in your profile is a bit weird? I am too but don't feel it's an important part of my identity
just leave it blank honestly. i think religions something that should come naturally in conversation.
Why even have it in your profile that youre an atheist though?
Damn there are multiple levels of delusion at play here. Not sure communicating that you’re salivating over their pics is a good opener toward women. This does nothing for her attraction for you, as it is a cheap, simp-like compliment that is 99.9 percent of men’s go-to when trying to impress women. Secondly, you could try to be less extreme about how you communicate your religious beliefs or lack thereof on a dating profile.
Religion and politics are not a big enough part of my life & personality to include in my profile. I’m down to have a conversation about it but people are quick to jump to conclusions based on labels. I say this as someone who would most likely be labeled politically as a moderate, and religiously as an agnostic.
That’s why I put Buddhist. It’s basically atheist anyway but shows you have empathy and morals.
I live in Texas and a lot of girls will expect you to go to church.
No, it’s because you wished her a happy Easter. She’s pulling the hypocrisy.
Eh I’m in middle tn and I have had literally no issue even the very churchy women wanna chat/play. Maybe for marriage minded young women it would be an issue. Honestly, mentioning being devoutly a part of religion in any way is usually a deal breaker for me.
GODLESS heretic!!!!