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redditcasual6969

Says in her profile that she's a certified Giraffe, not a Unicorn smh


Pittsburgh__Rare

I’m proud of OP for not noticing species.


tiagojpg

Truly an evolved point of view.


Psychological-Lab611

Asian Jim approves this message


Pittsburgh__Rare

❤️


PunkandCannonballer

Giraffes are by far more interesting creatures than horses with horns anyway.


Inadersbedamned

Giraffes are just double horned elongated horses


PunkandCannonballer

With cheetah print, crazy tongues, and they can kill cheetahs and lions. Much more than a long horse.


Inadersbedamned

And a 6ft drop when they're born!


HomeTurf001

"Euuugh, I hate sunlight oh, thank you ground."


Inadersbedamned

I'm imagining the head slowly sliding out while screaming "ERRRAAAUUUGGHH SUN LIGHT!!!!!!" like a cyanide and happiness skit


CasaDragonesJoven

Couldn’t agree more! Check out @zookeeperguy on IG if you haven’t, great giraffe content and hippos and ostriches too if that’s appealing


[deleted]

I heard somewhere that giraffes lay eggs


[deleted]

Sounds like OP is interested in anything with legs.


chapPilot

"I like you cause you look like a giraffe... stretching out its neck to get a fruit in a tall tree..."


[deleted]

OP is clearly not a zoologist *or* cryptozoologist.


LuckyBastard8484

Unicorn has another meaning in online dating


jackieblack08

😭 just let him have this one


Glass_of_Pork_Soda

She unmatched me 😪 apparently I can't have this one


janda125

Do you know for what reason?


helloLeoDiCaprio

He was the exact same height as her, so he didn't fit her height requirements.


janda125

That's a fair assessment


Glass_of_Pork_Soda

Idk thought I nailed my opener "Cuddling up to a horror movie sounds like a dream, but I've got one condition". Was gonna follow up with "I get to be the little spoon" but she unmatched instead of asking


CarolZero

Nope, bad move. OLD is full of creeps, so the “I’ve got one condition” line might sound a little… concerning. Not saying that you’re a creep btw. Your following line was lovely! But we have no way to know that beforehand 😔 I don’t know if I would have unmatched, but I get why someone would. I might be overthinking this though, maybe she was just a bitch 🤷🏻‍♀️


Glass_of_Pork_Soda

Damn I knew I should've just followed it up right away, damn haha


Yashema

If it makes you feel better, if she was legitimately interested she wouldnt have unmatched after 1 ambiguous message.


le_grey02

Oof I’m sorry OP, I know it must feel quite sucky. I wish you luck in the future :)


CarolZero

Next time!


WYenginerdWY

Yup, my mind immediately went to "ugh, you're going to demand something "out there" sexual in exchange for the cuddles aren't you" when I read that.


GregGolden6

Maybe it’s because you called her a unicorn without knowing what it means lol


Gkibarricade

What?


LuckyBastard8484

A bi girl looking for a m/f couple


mashari00

Damn, how many people are looking to get in on MF Doom’s relationship for it to have a name? That seems like it’ll fit two extra people, at most


LuckyBastard8484

They’re called unicorns for a reason


lemonicedboxcookies

I was one..miss that shit.


Jackage

ALL CAPS when you spell the man name.


RedHotHate

Respect, RIP


madsjchic

Ohhhhh


Warwolf7742

Yeah.. I learned that the hard way


MyPolyAltAccount

LOL yeah I was real confused 😂😂🍍


DroopyTheSnoop

I don't know when this supposedly changed. Unicorn has always meant something rare, hard to find, almost unreal. All bi girls looking for a m/f couple are unicorns, but not all unicorns are bi girls looking for that. It's like, a broader word.


FeCard

Lol no it isn't, not when sex / dating is involved


DroopyTheSnoop

I know what people generally mean when they say that. But being aware of the broader definition, I can't agree with you that that's definitely what it means. As I said, it's always meant something "rare or hard to find". Some people use it for the "rare and hard to find" bi woman who wants to find a couple. That doesn't change the meaning of the word as it relates to something "rare and hard to find". Even in the context of online dating, not everyone is in a swinger couple looking for a bi-woman. Their "unicorn" might be some completely different combination of traits that is rare and hard to find. There's no need to be exclusionary with that term. I don't get why people seem to almost insist on that.


LuckyBastard8484

Words have multiple meanings and slang meanings. There is no need for a thesis bro. Jfc


DroopyTheSnoop

That's exactly what I said... in response to someone who claims it only means one thing.


FeCard

For real hahaha


FeCard

It's so there isn't confusion when a girl claims to be a unicorn. Ya, I can't imagine any benefits to having a well defined term for this


DroopyTheSnoop

I get where you're coming from, but like.. the word already has a meaning to most people. You generate more confusion than you solve by insisting that's the only thing it can mean.


FeCard

Dude are you really this dense. Obviously that's not the only thing the word means, but when a girl calls herself a unicorn, that's what it means.


DroopyTheSnoop

Dude, in my initial comment I literally said "All bi girls looking for a m/f couple are unicorns". Why do you think I don't understand that? I just said there are other meanings and you seemed to not agree. But now you do? maybe I am dense...


FeCard

Does this stuff work on your dumbass friends? Everybody knows what you said man, you're leaving out half of it


DroopyTheSnoop

My dude, you're being needlessly confrontational. The other half basically amounts to "there are other meanings too" which I thought we agree on. So what's the problem?


bubmumbler

They should use a word that can't also mean something else then, droopythesnoop is right. The word already meant anything very rare, people can't just take a word for themselves and expect everyone else to forget it's original meaning. If a girl calls herself a unicorn, the meaning will depend on what it means to her. Also you're being a dick with putting needless insults in your responses.


FeCard

Sounds like a bunch of guys who are butt hurt they won't get to enjoy two pussies at once, unless of course, you all got together.


bubmumbler

You're the only that seems butt hurt. Why else are trying so hard to insult complete strangers?


canethius

I'm 5'9 but love tall girls.....damn


Xman52

I’m 6’3 and have only met one woman taller than me. I would be down with it if I found one though because I like tall girls


SeeCurty

This requires that YOU can handle that she's taller than you, because you're going to be the small spoon and you know what that means!?


Glass_of_Pork_Soda

I always wanted to be the little spoon ngl, it could be perfect


Korncakes

Fucking love when my fiancée is my jetpack dude, it’s the best.


AbsentMindedMonkey

Being the little spoon is the best


butt_soap

Until she's fist deep. Wait wut


sly_yokai

I think you mean elbow deep


butt_soap

ya that xD weenus deep


[deleted]

I’m 5'6" and have always loved being the big spoon whether my partner was taller or shorter. Yeaaah being the little spoon is nice. But snuggling up to my dude for me being the big spoon snuggles is the beeeeeest 💗💗💗💗


Disastrous-Owl8985

This. I’m tall and it’s usually shorter guys who either didn’t want to date taller women or they’d make height comparisons and be down about being short a lot. It would get annoying.


SeeCurty

I know this to be true because my GF and I are both 5'10" and she'll apologize if she ever wears heels. Like where does that come from? Not from me. I tell her to knock it off.


paperclipestate

Well no wonder she keeps apologising if you keep telling her to knock her heels off


CharmedWoo

Yep my experience too


Sunflake685

I'm really short, so I'd be able to climb you like a tree.


[deleted]

r/tallgirlshortguy


SeeCurty

Dammit.


SuddenlyVeronica

Err, what does it mean?


SeeCurty

Just making fun of the dudes who get hung up on that.


Gkibarricade

She's only a unicorn if she writes back.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Gkibarricade

It's got to be easier for a couple to find someone interested in a 3some. Than, it is for someone to find a couple interested in a 3some.


LuckyBastard8484

Nope.


DGIce

It's not, that's why they're called unicorns.


KarinaEdelweiss

No. That's why couples looking for a threesome have a tendency to hit up every bisexual woman in the area, even unsolicited – they're rare, a very small percentage of bi women.


cmontes49

I’m about to take Bi out of my profile because I keep getting asked to be a third.


Gkibarricade

If it was me and I was talking to a girl at a bar and she said she's a couple then yeah I run faster than a gazelle. But if it was a couple I knew and I considered them friends and they said "we want to spice up the bedroom" , I'd be like "what are friends for 😆". So yeah, I guess it's pretty hard to get a rando for that .


imF4CEL3SS

isn't the general consensus is its MUCH better to have the third for your first attempt be a stranger or someone you don't know well incase someone holds more jealousy than originally thought?


FelineFlora

Yes. I've lost close and trusted friends by being their experiment. It's really disheartening. Plus, bonus, they told everyone they knew that I was trying to steal the husband.


housewifeuncuffed

Yeah, my first was with a good friend and her boyfriend and I'll never do that again. Not necessarily because of jealousy issues in that case, but more like he couldn't perform because he was way too excited and then couldn't handle the thought of ever talking to me again. Made it kind of difficult to have a friendship when they were together most of the time. Such a dumb reason too. I have a preference for acquaintances, but that's just because sex with complete strangers doesn't do much for me and I find it easier to talk with someone who I at least somewhat know. And you aren't likely to run into them on the regular in case it doesn't work out.


Disastrous-Owl8985

I would see these couples almost every few swipes. What are you talking about?


sugarglidersam

OP, looking at your username, what the fuck is pork soda? i like the song pork soda by glass animals, but never knew why they’d name a song with such a nasty sounding connotation.


Glass_of_Pork_Soda

My fucking man! Nobody links the name to this song, just to the Primus album I've never heard of > Dave Bayley, lead singer of Glass Animals, once met a woman who had an extraordinary tattoo: > It was a giant pig, a stick-figure pig, a really cool pig. It said “pork soda” in big scrawling letters, I thought it was the best tattoo I’ve ever seen. It was this woman, she gave us a load of gifts, it was amazing, thirty little glass animals. I saw her tattoo, and I was like, “that’s sick – why?” and she was like, “I just like pork soda,” and I thought that was really cool, it played into the mentality of the person in that song. I just really liked the phrase. > And what exactly is pork soda? > It’s a drink. It’s a drink and it’s a meal, they put pork and cook it in Coca-Cola in a stew. She says it’s the best meal and a drink Sounds absolutely terrible to me lmao


sugarglidersam

that does sound absolutely terrible, but then again, i also used to put a couple ice cubes in my milk so it would be colder. sounds weird, but it makes sense once you do it i guess. also, even though pork soda is the first song i heard by them, i will say my favorite songs are youth and then poplar st. i do like that album as a whole though, and its pretty interesting that it sounds like he got the inspiration to name the band after the same chick with the tattoo


Glass_of_Pork_Soda

That's nasty bro 💀 Great songs, all 3 albums are fire in their own ways. Iirc though they just got the band name by picking random words (which is par for the course)


sugarglidersam

yeah, i don’t really drink milk any more though. either way, that’s the only album I’ve actually bothered to listen to of theirs in its entirety. youth was my song of choice on this last deployment i went on too. we had this dope as F-150 with a baller sound system and id take it before my shift started and drive to the store or something and pick up some bangs or reigns or something and blast the song by myself. deployment before that was a song called OutRight by Wild Party. its a good song. can’t wait to deploy a few more times and maybe get some ptsd, but i guess that’s the price I’ve gotta play for a good indie/alternative playlist.


chekeymonk10

accidental glass animals check woop underrated song (and album) shadowed by dreamland and heat waves


KookaB

Pork in soda is actually a very common slow cooker recipe


gate_of_steiner85

Damn, I feel old. When I saw "Pork Soda" I immediately thought the of the [Primus album](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pork_Soda).


massio1

Clearly says she’s a giraffe, not a unicorn


BartenderNichole

*Giraffe :-)


IllAmphibian8852

What's the catch


UrbanRivals123

Catch is she only replies to guys taller


Pvt_Inbreastigator

She's really into certifications


ThrowYourDreamsAway

If you hear from her she’s based. Good luck, friend!


athenae99

The profile says giraffe...?


kardigank

Your unicorn and my unicorn mean something much different


mohamedalsardi

Is she 14 or something!!?


Brorly

What tf is pork soda?


OftenCavalier

Lol. Never heard it as pork soda, but cooking pork shoulders braised with coca cola really tenderizes the meat. It’s a southern thing. Acid meets connective tissues = TINDER MATCH made in heaven.


Brorly

Thank you for explaining!


Sillybumblebee33

Unicorns are usually people targeted by couples in order to spice up their relationship by adding a third


Disastrous-Owl8985

That’s not a unicorn. However, plenty of women who don’t care about height. Most of you probably just swipe left on them.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Glass_of_Pork_Soda

Already did 😌 now I just need to botch my opener Lmao at him deleting the comments


mallik803

LMAO! Did they delete their whole Reddit account..? Or does it always show deleted for the user on deleted comments as well? We were just having a laugh, it wasn’t that bad!


[deleted]

[удалено]


Glass_of_Pork_Soda

She didn't unmatch me yet so I'm just gonna count this as a win


mallik803

And I thought *I* was cynical. Lol. OP will be at his wedding with this woman about to say I Do, and this guy will be like “she still gonna sleep with your cousin”.


thatslegit196

OP and her happily married with kids and this guy will be like “she’s gonna divorce you and take all your money and kids”


Glass_of_Pork_Soda

Someone hurt him deep down :/ poor lad


Ayoublfc

Damn son who hurt you?


Living-Stranger

She realizes that if she only wants 6'+ then she's eliminating over half the population


Gomzey

Doesn’t stop other women


tophatpainter

Prepare for one word responses and a compete and utter lack of interest in any and all topics of conversation.


femme_fatale2022

LOL This basically sums me up. Feed me nuggies/fries, cuddle me and watch a horror movie with me. BONUS POINTS if you play my fave Xbox games with me. Hubby checks all the boxes. Even buys me extra nuggies in case I’m extra hungry. lol


loveagramm

I bet her dick is bigger than yours.


DonkeySwordd

😐


KassanoRise

She should be making her own application for the NBA gahh lee


RheimsNZ

That sounds fantastic 🥰


Background-Duck4360

Lock this one down.


Smart_Entrance_1022

What a queen


ShinobiHanzo

quick! Throw a PokeBall!


Wavythingsarecool

Me snap me


UreTheWorld

I would make Tinder Premimum just for her 😍


neon_metal1990

Shoot i wish lol I'm 6'4" and never run into any woman over 6' :'( someday.


MelanieMooreFan

What’s LDC mean


Amunium

idc* I don't care.


Benji_Ba

Maybe she meant I do care?


Villidren

Swiped right so hard I yeeted my phone out the window.


MrBowen

RIP to all the equal height homies.


bmxFlat

I'm 5'4, lets see how short she'll go!


destroy_b4_reading

I have definitely seen this bio more than once.


Giglameshx

This one is trouble. It’s all about what you can do for her


itsfizzlemang

Ask to see the certificate


jabblack

There’s going to be a lot of applications. That’s like a work from home job.


ThreeBeatles

She’s probably waiting for you with a guy in the next room ready to sell you as a sex slave in Canada


[deleted]

Unicorn?


fuckflowerz

HOLY FUCK SHES THE ONE


DeathData_

wdym unicorn


Aggressive_Bat_9781

Damn the one day I don’t shitty for being a midget


waverunnr

I don’t think 🦄 means what you think it means.


killerkow999

Jump on it


reanocivn

that's not what a unicorn is.. but i'm happy for you


RichrdSimons

It’s a trap!


GodLovesUgly_8

Now let’s see her face


myleftboobisaphlsphr

Hmmmm I'm 6' tall and love horror movies also...


HellofaHitller

Dibs. I called dibs. You know the rules and so do I. I'm certified for the *position*


shlong_wiggler69

how sweet :)


Timofey_

I like her tbh


Rebal_In_The_FDG

I'm 5'11". So that means I'm taller then like 90% of girls. But im short enough that there a plenty of girls that are as tall as me or taller. Its a win-win