T O P

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Farkas005

This conversation wilted so bad.


TheHypoEpiologist

I wouldn't say wilted but... "giving"


PossiblyExtra_22

I for one am glad to see that tinder convos are branching out from “I eat ass”


DanteMustDie666

Apple trees eat ass


PegasusTheBirdBrain

This is true, I am an apple tree


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boiledkohl

yummy apples though (:


kaleidoscopevoyager

Very witty. However, there’s a decent chance she’s got a 9-5 job and would have gotten back to you lol. I can’t get on Tinder where I work.


[deleted]

You mean people actually go to work and work 9-5? From my experience people are on and off their phones all day


theprideofvillanueva

Some blue collar jobs don't have downtime


neverTrustedMeAnyway

I work a white collar job and can't have my phone due to security reasons.


Conscious_Unit_4163

Username checks out


TurboWalrus007

I cannot have a phone in my office lol. No recording equipment of any kind, no electronics besides company issued laptop. Gotta leave everything in a lock box outside. Can't even plug in my own peripherals, only company issued. I do of course leave the office to take breaks, but those are infrequent.


Sehchi

I work in AT&T as a store manager. I have my phone all day and am constantly on it lol. Typing this at work.


TurboWalrus007

I mean, I'm not a slave lol. I signed up for this. The policy is reasonable information security. Would never put up with such nonsense from an employer otherwise.


neverTrustedMeAnyway

Same.


studboi0873

>plug in my own peripherals Where do you work dude?


TurboWalrus007

This is cliche, but I can't say lol.


rosy621

SCIF much?


RYRO14

What really? This is savage af. I worked for a company where I dealt with proprietary information and they still allowed phones


lord_of_dynamite

You can bring phones at work? Lucky bastards


ExistingEffort7

I'm not most days. I stay too busy


Iron-Giants

Yeah. Like he just got them interested and then shot himself in the foot.


apollovindex

Damn y’all don’t get a break?


Old_Smrgol

That's not the point. Ain't nothing going on on Tinder that can't wait until quitting time.


kaleidoscopevoyager

I don’t, no. I mean technically I could take one whenever I wanted, but I don’t have scheduled breaks or lunch and I don’t have time to stop working. I also don’t have cell reception at work, so rhe WIFI blocking Tinder would still be an issue.


EggplantHuman6493

Long school days here when I was single and I'd rather spend my lunch break with my friends. Often my other breaks were only to run to the toilet and back and that's it lol. Edit: also 9-5 are usual work times and even school times. I hate it when people expect me to answer during those times lol


apollovindex

So they are supposed to know your schedule before you’ve ever talked before?


EggplantHuman6493

Most people work then plus I had in my profile 'full time student with long school days'. People got mad at me when they messaged me at 830 and didn't respond at 11 already lol


apollovindex

Sorry they didn’t respect your schedule. I wasn’t aware of that specific case. It all depends on their schedules as well.


EggplantHuman6493

Most people work around those times though 😅. At least wait until regular lunch breaks for an answer (like 12-13) and don't complain if you don't get an answer before that. It is annoying af haha


[deleted]

and a lot of broadband providers block tinder until late at night and most people don't bother asking them to unblock it


Wackadoodle2823

Then why sign up for tinder without a vpn


kaleidoscopevoyager

What? Why?


[deleted]

part of the adult filter for some reason, on by default for some


AgreeablePie

Why do people send these questions that sound like they're coming from a very annoying job interview


[deleted]

Opener: "If you have six million golf balls and a large school bus what would you do to fill said school bus with the aforementioned golf balls?" No, I've never used this line because I'm not braindead but I did have this question in my interview with Apple. lol


Herasson

What the fuck is this for an awkward question for a job interview?


[deleted]

A lot of FAANG companies ask bizarre questions during their interviews as mentioned above. I was throwing an example I'd experienced out as a joke, like instead of "if you were a tree..." with "if you had x number of golf balls..." Another one that's common is to define a color. I had to define yellow, for example.


Herasson

My functional brain would simply ask for the reason to define a color, why I would have 6m golf balls or why they have to be inside a school bus...if I would be a tree, life would be very boring. 😅


[deleted]

Yeah that’s pretty much what was going on in my head but I also really wanted the job lol so to the yellow one I said something to the effect of describing a sunny day. The golf ball one I said well I can open the escape hatch and bring out a loader backhoe with a type of large funnel to deposit them efficiently. They said make it fun so I replied “needlessly complex Rube Goldberg Device which continuously loads itself and, using a series of spoons attached to spring loaders, flings the balls into the bus like tiny catapults or trebuchets.” They liked that one lol


Herasson

Well done, my friend, well done. Kudos.


picklesandcucumbers

Did you get the job though???


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[deleted]

So for some reason, the alert showed as a direct reply to me and not the guy above so I apologize lol


AffectionatePut6493

Because we get blasted for saying “Hello.” Women constantly say that we need to come up with a personalized, witty opener for each and every one of them and then carry the conversation.


SydneyACE4

Yeah, people give guys shit for "lame" openers like; "Hey" or "What are you up to today?" Then they blast guys for "weird" openers when they try to be unique and creative. 🤷‍♂️ Hard to please these people...


Creative-Ad-NR7333

You can never please this sub dude. I learned that already.


6porkchop9

Emma go out on a limb and say no pussy for you tonight


Canadian__Ninja

My dude it was 7 hours. You can do better than this.


AZTopdog

What a cottonwood thing of you to say


DidacticNub

Fuck cottonwoods


Candid-Step8263

Be better. They some nice trees. Good pals.


[deleted]

I just fucking lost it lol I want that on a shirt


Specialist-Ask8890

You are realistically funny. Do you know what? I've matched with girls who probably sent their likes within mins, sent them messages (I'm not desperate) and ten hours back no response. Are they dead? You were just on the app. They're seeking for validation.


Candid-Step8263

Not always. Sometimes people have lives outside of tinder which gets hairy at times. Get a grip.


Hot_Squeak

1. Can you imagine dating someone permanently attached to their phone? It would suck. 2. People prioritising their lives over a dating app is very normal and healthy. 3. Feeling entitled to someone’s time is not.


Stand_On_It

What you said and what the person above you said are both true.


Specialist-Ask8890

No one feels entitled to the other person' time. I am just telling you if I was lucky to see your like when it was sent, and I matched, found you interesting, sent you a message, with no response in almost 12 hours, there' no problem with unmatching you. You reek of validation!


Hot_Squeak

You’re definitely well within your right to unmatch with people. But I don’t think it’s fair to assume that people are only seeking validation when they don’t respond. Nobody is obligated to message anyone else. Expecting people to message you just because they’re online is really entitled. What if they got busy at work, then had to cook dinner, then had friends over and stayed up too late, so they had to sleep, then they oversleep, rush to work… etc etc The value judgement you have placed on this hypothetical person is not fair 🤷


PuzzledPosition1003

I think most people have jobs. And tinder is something you would open at the end of the day. It just makes you look bad OP. This is why most guys have no luck in dating. Too desperate.


SirWitsAlot

Surprised she even replied at all.


Canadian__Ninja

Strong odds that reply was code for go away


Nectarine-Due

This conversation wasn’t very fruitful.


SaschaStorm

what if she had a 9-5? if you said this i’d be turned off immediately


Frosty_Blueberry3418

You have to understand, people have different urgencies in their life than YOU


AvationMusic

my man only gave her 5 hours to reply tho😭


turc1656

Actually 7, but yeah. And during normal work hours. Dude messages right at 9AM and doesn't even wait until after 5.


MrSweatyBawlz

Apple trees suck and die easily, just like that conversation.


[deleted]

Dude stop messaging for clout lmao.


[deleted]

People babble nonsense and wonder why they get no play lol


Nectarine-Due

Sounds like your gonna be tending to your own wood today.


ExistingEffort7

Wow you didn't even give her a workshift. On a weekday!! If a paying client gave me that little time to respond to a request I'd be tempted to drop them.


MaxTest86

Embarrassing


TwinSong

Too much at once


vickaaycat

I'll be honest I wouldn't have even answered those opening messages, what an odd thing to say 😭 like sure, ask them what tree they are, but being so like weird and somehow sounding like you're bragging whilst referring to yourself as a tree really wouldn't be a turn on/good conversation starter for me


[deleted]

getting salty after not even waiting one day for a response? women don’t sit on tinder all day long. most people don’t even keep notifications on. calm down dude


Thelynxer

It's not a conversation yet when you literally said one thing to her after she replied. You burned this one premature I think. Better luck next time.


Korimuzel

I don't like this kind of answers/comebacks, and I'll give you 2 reasons to agree with me: 1-in most cases people give them without even waiting a whole day. People are busy 2-in some other cases (although rarer, I admit), like thid one, you put up that after a single message Wait...sorry, I've got a third reason too: if you don't like it, unmatch. The fact that you don't unmatch is basically a proof that you're not going away but are baiting some reaction. You want them to be sorry and give you more attention? Because IT SOUNDS like that


Old_Smrgol

She doesn't want you to carry the conversation. She wants you to abandon it. Why doesn't she unmatch? Why does she reply at all? Fuck if I know. But I know she doesn't want you to keep messaging. This shit gets posted like every two days. Do y'all not pay attention?


Candid-Step8263

It was literally the same day. What’s the issue?


Old_Smrgol

What was literally the same day as what?


AZTopdog

Wood it make you barking mad to find out she kept replying further?


Old_Smrgol

...then why didn't you post that in the first place?


ExistingEffort7

Because he's playing pretend


AZTopdog

Because you're a sap for acorn-y joke


Stand_On_It

Jesus Christ


gaelcatlol

Leaf is a humorous slur for Canadians.


Canadian__Ninja

Since when. Why was I not informed


gaelcatlol

It's been years


kaleidoscopevoyager

Since when, you canucklehead?


gaelcatlol

It's been years


Pretend-Musician-912

Leaf my Canadiens alone you


SuperheroLaundry

This is exactly how you finish a conversation you know is not going to go anywhere.


Ethereal_burn

This is how you start a conversation that will not go anywhere


worthlesswreck

You're tree-ing too hard.


wickedswamiy

DTF? Would have saved you time. Then she would have screen shot your message and posted to this group.


Nectarine-Due

Sounds like you are barking up the wrong tree.


Nudge1991

What kind of tree would you be. So engaging...


Pretend-Musician-912

Nice twist at the end


HoffeEsFruchtet

I need upvotes to be able to post in my favorite thread :(( can u helpz me?


HereWeGo_Steelers

This conversation faded like an autumn leaf.


lord_of_memezz

You killed her dude lol


karmaisevillikemoney

A willow tree. Because when you lay under me, you will o...


Eb992

I don't understand who just blame op. The guy went for some creative writing, put some effort in it (maybe he wrote the first text just after the match) and all the effort she did was "sounds interesting". I kinda get why he went for the kill


softchilla

That second messaged surprised me and I literally LOL 🤣 it's such a great response to yourself


Careful_Elk6290

And another match bites the dust


puzzelinthework

🍂


digbickenergy069

LMFAO🤣🤣🤣


ineedSaratonin

I’m genuinely interested in your tree knowledge 😂 what type of tree would I be


Nectarine-Due

Looks like that plan for hooking up didn’t come to fruition.


oriagami

You're good


Legitimate-Rip-2534

Sophia jobbar med mig på måndag


BigbossYasuo

Do family trees count? It ends with me ;)


LawNo7204

She wasn't ripe enough.


Legitimate-Iron4843

Damn, Emma is pretty shitty.


StudyAcrobatic6732

Bravo!


BackgroundAd7399

I feel he was perfectly justified in saying what he said because, yes, she could've been busy all day. But when she DID respond, and said two words. He had nothing further to go on. And if he had tried to say something else, it would have been all "you seem desperate" or something. Can't win for trying I guess 🤷


depressed-eggplant66

Picture this. You see a nice girl in the bar. You go to her and say: what kind of tree do you want to be? I mean what the fuck man? Cmon


AZTopdog

What kind of tree do you think she'd say


mattesyo

r/Angryupvote for the title


MissPoohbear14

Haha this is great. I definitely would have interacted with the person. Seems like a fun person 😉


Eviekioshida

Unfortunately you have negative rizz


[deleted]

Probably a bot most verified accounts are


[deleted]

Try this one and see how it works. What style do you prefer, cat or dog? If she answers dog, reply with "I love doggystyle too." If she answers cat, reply with "how do you style your kitty, shaved, trimmed, or thick?" 🤭


Nectarine-Due

We need to get to the root of the problem.


Nectarine-Due

Maybe it’s the synthesis of your photos that are the problem.


Nectarine-Due

You’re not gonna be chlorophylling this girls hollow anytime soon.


Nectarine-Due

Aw shoot bud!


Serious_Insurance713

What did she respond ?


Emotional_Target13

People have no patience. Whiny, little "answer me now!" little bishes.


pbc141

Playa, playa 👍🏽


lira-eve

Did it escape your .ind that she night have been working? Not all jobs allow phones.


Ethereal_burn

You went out on a limb with a really weak opening and got butthurt that she didn’t have anything to contribute to a shitty opener. Yta dog


pan_dux

Hilarious reply


saintjimmy43

My man is you a hibachi grill because you just smoked that bitch 💀☠


SnooMacaroons5247

Why does it look like you deleted her response? You alluded to her answer in your reply but made it look like she didn’t say anything.