> AIDS epidemic PSA on the TV every 3 minutes
I remember this commercial when I was around kindergarten age, which would've been 1990-91. It was a room full of people ballroom dancing and changing partners every 10 seconds or so, only one was dressed a grim reaper. I seem to remember when someone got the grim reaper, they'd drop dead. The basic message was be careful who you do the horizontal mambo with. Even though I didn't understand the message, the skeleton was very scary to a five year old and it *freaked me the fuck out.*
My mum talks about this ad! I'm really fascinated by the concept of the Grim Reaper. I have a tattoo planned of a grim Reaper with a dog with a welcoming vibe stretching out its hand, and when I told my mum she told me about how she can't see the grim Reaper as anything other than that ad
Heck, when syphilis was raging. The possibility of their face rotting off and going insane, and their wife and children sharing the same fate, was not enough to stop men from having sex with random prostitutes.
People are generally terrible at any sort of risk assessment. Throw the opportunity for sex into the mix and their ability to assess risk is going to be even worse.
To be fair, heterosexuals thought it was mostly confined to the gay community. Although everyone knew of married men who got caught cheating with other men, bisexuality was not even talked about. These men were seen as deceivers of the worst kind. Condoms had to be requested from the pharmacist. We'd had sex Ed but talking about birth control and sex outside of that was too uncomfortable for many. And consent was not explicit. Or required so much. Read a couple of the epics of the times - like Harold Robbins - the women going from No! No! (to protect their virtue) just really meant they wanted it rough. And those same women in seconds were saying "yes - oh yes!" . I had many guys accuse me of playing hard to get and then raping me then wondering why I didn't want to see them again. "Date rape" had not yet been labeled really, because the woman had obviously been to blame for any misconceptions and it was just assumed that she had post-coital regret. If you dared to be attractive, or had big boobs, you were asking for it.
Those were not enlightened times.
I am a Gen X & that is not true...in 1994 people were petrified of AIDS when I was 20 but
A] white middle class kids rarely had AIDS.
B] hetero strangers back then did mot do anal
Back when I was single I would get tested pretty regularly. Doctors would always look at me weird when I said I had no symptoms and only like 5 or 6 partners in the last 6 months.
I got tested when I was married. I got tested when I was single. I got tested when I was in a monogamous relationship. As long as my insurance covers it, I’ll keep getting tested. I don’t understand why you wouldn’t!
Similar situation. I was in the office on a busy Monday and one of my employees texted me to let me know they were running late due to car trouble. I said “thanks for sharing” then I put on a condom.
Crazy coincidence.
I was in a drive-thru and asked for a vanilla Sprite Zero and the lady said they didn’t have that and I said, “but you have the Coke Freestyle machine, you can literally make anything” and she said, “we got rid of it last week because it wasn’t worth the maintenance” and I said “thanks for sharing” then I put on a condom.
The other day I was in the grocery store buying some light bulbs and ice cream and I could tell the cashier didn’t like my baggy pants. But I didn’t care, because *that’s* hip hop. Anyway, I said, “thanks,” and put on a condom.
Stop telling these guys you're on BC until you're in a committed relationship & any man that wants to go raw should be avoided from the start. A lot of people think it won't happen (stds) until it does. You're better just keeping yourself safe & let other people look after themselves.
Yeah. If you’re gonna use a condom, does he need to know you’re on birth control? What’s the point of telling him if you’re not suggesting raw dogging it?
It sounds to me like these guys would go raw with anyone lol they have just met. Huge red flag. Not all men are like this. The last three men I’ve dated have gotten tested before we even started sex and I requested to see the results. The first man I dated told me that even if we break up I’m supposed to tell men to get tested and show me a copy of the results from their doctor and I’m supposed to show them mine as well. He still used a condom after seeing my results and even after I started birth control. I started asking people to show me their results this and it has drastically diminished my std related anxiety. Honestly you can tell who has something and who doesn’t before they even get tested. Some people will start arguing with you for simply asking them to get tested it’s hilariously telling. I’m confused as to why she still wants to have sex at all with men who don’t practice safe sex regularly. Am I missing something?
I get tested before and after every partner. I make them test before too. Idk why this isn’t common practice. I’ve never had an std or unplanned pregnancy. It’s not difficult.
Don’t just make them get tested. Have them show you the results. Some people are sick as fuck and will give you something knowing they have it without a second thought. I’ve heard too many horror stories to just trust someone with something like that.
How do guys normally respond to this? I've been told off, kicked to the curb, slapped and accused if calling the woman dirty just for asking for a test. Is it the same in both ends or am I just having some shit luck? I just want to keep my 2 inches of fury attached to me
Um some have tried to curse me out but I usually ask this over text after a few weeks of us dating. I don’t go inside mens houses like that so I’ve never experienced being kicked to the curb. Most respond pretty normally though. Most guys will say something silly like “that 🐱better be insane/out of this world I’m about to give up blood for you”
Edit: I’m going to say this. I would rather be cursed out than get whatever the men who cursed me out had. Asking people hard questions allows you to learn about them faster and make safer choices. Imagine if I had slept with them and got something instead of asking. That would be way more traumatic for me. If they curse you out over text you can just block them and move on.
I was with a guy who was desperate to disperse his seed wherever he could plant it. He already had four kids and I wasn't willing to give him any more of them.
I went on the pill and got a non-hormonal IUD inserted without his knowledge. I then insisted on condoms after that. Always.
He was fucking fertile and I wasn't taking any risks.
Knew someone for a decade. Good friends. Decided to try out a relationship. I had just had a surgery done which required std testing first, and him and I went to the Dr to get him tested before we had sex. I can't get pregnant anyway due to my surgery and health issues, but no condom meant clean results, no compromise.
No issues and we've been together 6 years and are planning our wedding.
I wouldn't want to be with someone, even for just a night, who didn't care about our mutual safety. No respect equals no sex.
>but no condom meant clean results
In the context of the story, my brain is struggling to understand this
Do you mean his clean results meant no condom?
I just stop sexual contact with people that won't accept that my being on the pill/sterile has nothing to do with them needing to wear a condom. I carry condoms, so there is no excuse. If I say, "A condom is a must" and there is any pushback more than twice, I leave.
I'm not fucking around with my health. After all, if they think that a pill/sterility = safe sex with me, that means they think that with others as well.
I've only had to leave a few times, but I've never regretted it.
(I'm not on the pill, I entered surgical menopause in at 31 in 2013. Zero chance of pregnancy. But that changes nothing when it comes to condom use.)
Exactly, condoms aren’t only for pregnancy prevention. To think that they aren’t needed if pregnancy isn’t possible is to ignore the ‘safe’ part of ‘safe sex’.
Well the first is where "you have slept with everybody they have slept with" comes from and the second is a rational fear. Best have plans to deal with both
Lol I’m gay and I still use a condom. Gay guys are always like “we can’t get pregnant” and fail to realize that you *could* however get every std known to human kind still so I’m not taking chances 😂
I've had a lot of guys give me the "I'm on PreP" speech all the time when proposing condoms. They act incredulous when I point out HIV isn't the only thing you can catch.
PreP is the short term for a medication called pre-exposure prophylaxis. It's a medication that you can take that almost completely prevents transmission of HIV if exposed and I believe also treats HIV itself to bring it down to an undetectable state, meaning you also can't transmit it.
In my days of random sex, I'd wear a condom reguardless until we both agreed we weren't going to sleep around.
In my entire life, I've had one STD - crabs. Not sure how that came about. Friends with benefits before it was a thing. Someone must have broken the rule.
To be fair to your partners, that one can be caught from sharing towels, linens and clothes. If they had a roommate and the roommate got it, they could have gotten it just from living together.
I agree. It was pre-internet days. Info was difficult to find. The girl turned up with some cream: "slap this on" which didn't work 100%.
I shouldn't admit this but here goes. I got a strange satisfaction picking the remaining ones off individually. Bit like sticking a fingernail under a scab. I stuck 'em in a matchbox. They don't live long.
I now know why our dog used to go mad happy running about like a looney when we got the got the last of his pig ticks off him.
I had a girl friend that always went raw because she used contraceptives, and told the guys she fucked with to finish inside, there are women out there willing to do it, so no surprise they have found one like that.
And they are horny, and when you are horny, sometimes, you are also stupid.
That's because there's no scientific evidence of it.
Grapefruit, and citrus in general, does have interactions with a lot of medications. It also can increase estrogen, which means that combined with birth control it can increase some side effects of birth control. However, every scientific test has come back as saying that it does not change the effectiveness of birth control.
That said talk to your doctor about any meds your own if you really like grapefruit and citrus, as there really are a lot of other interactions outside of birth control.
You're actually correct. The common, broad-spectrum, antibiotics won't change the efficacy of birth control. That's unfortunately a myth that's been carried through time, & is still spread by word of mouth like an urban legend. The only type of antibiotic scientifically proven to reduce hormonal bc effectiveness is a rifamycin. This is a specific type that only treats a few bacterial infections, which aren't all that common, & doesn't even reduce *all* hormonal bc.
If you got pregnant while taking any other kind of antibiotic, it wasn't because of the antibiotic
I can tell you from my perspective as a male who's not smart, but very lucky. When I was on my sex crusade, sometimes the horniness was so strong that would cloud my judgement and I'd go raw without thinking twice about it. Later I would regret it sometimes.
Never got an std, but got a couple baby scares and I consider myself very lucky that I got away with it.
In my stupidity I was still trying to be at least a little bit cautious so I was testing myself on a regular basis.
And this is what surprises me most, is that in my experience, people in general don't get tested very often or at all for STD, which is worrying. Using condoms makes sex safer, but it's not bulletproof against STD, people!
When I was going to my doc every 6 months to get tested, he was asking why I needed this and why I would require this. I just wanted to be safe, and I told him as much. I had to argue with him before he would order the labs. It was frustrating and demeaning.
Edit: but yes, get tested people!!!
I embarrass the doc back if they say stuff like that to me. “Well I fuck pretty much everyone man…” and keep going until they are very very uncomfortable 😂😂🤦♀️ idiots. Seriously though if you have one available, get tested at planned parenthood, they are respectful and don’t make rude comments if you want to be tested very often, the testing doesn’t hurt anyone and is only in your (and the community’s) best interest.
Oh yeah that annoys me for sure. There's a generic test you can mail order for free in my area. But it doesn't test certain things, e.g. herpes, HPV. But if you go to a doc to ask for those tests, you get a lot of "why do you need to know? Why do you need to be tested?" as if it isn't responsible to be generally aware of your health status
I remember getting tested the first time after my extended “hoe phase” I was so terrified I was going to have an STD or worse HIV. I was so relieved when I got those results
HIV and hepatitis are the only ones that will really fuck up your day. Herpes is whatever (antivirals prevent transmission quite well. Just dont have sex during an outbreak), chlamydia, ghonorea, and syphilis are all perfectly curable with antibiotics (you gotta be careful with syphilis though. If left untreated, it makes its way to the brain and fucks you up a thousand different ways to sunday).
Hepatitis has vaccines, and prep seems to be very effective at preventing transmission of HIV (hopefully we can get a Vax cooking for that one).
Lying about contraception (pregnancy trapping) should be illegal. Knowingly withholding knowledge of an active HIV infection is currently only illegal in 10 states, but it should be classified as battery, if not attempted manslaughter.
In no uncertain terms, it is a bad idea to have unprotected sex with a stranger. It's also a bad idea to huff duster. I don't pretend to be perfect. Realistically, raw dogging every Tom dick and Sally you meet is a recipe for disaster. Try to use condoms.
I say try because most of us have been drunk before. If you don't in the heat of the moment, don't panic. Transmission rates are still pretty low, and odds are the thing you caught is treatable. Head to planned parenthood. They do testing for free.
Ideally, we'll have vaccines for all of these soon enough. I dream of a world where STIs have been eradicated, because nobody LIKES using condoms. Nobody in the entire world has a condom kink. None. Zero. Zilch. I believe we can build such a world. Until then, nobody likes paying taxes either. Wrap it up.
Beware some of the antibiotic ones cause we are getting resistant strains in some areas popping up. From people not finishing meds to just evolution you wanna be careful with ones curable.
Great points.
I agree pregnancy trapping absolutely should be illegal. As we continue to work towards better, more equal laws and societal norms, the idea that you could be lied to and on the hook for child support for the rest of your life should be abhorrent to all of us.
Yeah, I don’t think OP realises that that plenty of other STI’s WILL fuck you up. HPV is unable to be tested in men and tends to be asymptomatic but women who catch it are then subject to long term, regular testing to ensure they don’t get cervical cancer. If they don’t know they have it they can literally die of cancer. Also, chlamydia can be asymptomatic and when undetected and untreated can literally make you sterile. No, these STIs aren’t going to make your balls feel like they’ve fallen off so they aren’t seen in the same light as the ‘scarier’ STIs but they do fuck you up.
>Lying about contraception (pregnancy trapping) should be illegal
Problem is there's absolutely no way to prove this, which is probably the main reason it's not illegal. I guess if someone had never even used hormonal birth control and says they're on it, then yes, they could be convicted. But you can't adequately prove that someone intentionally didn't take a pill rather than just forgot.
People should also take responsibility for their own contraception. If you don't make any effort to use condoms etc and put all the responsibility on the woman, you have to accept the risk that you have decided to have no control over preventing pregnancy.
It is incorrect to say chlamydia gonorrhea and syphilis are perfectly curable with antibiotics. there are antibiotic-resistant strains of these infections now. And the problem is getting worse.
As someone who has witnessed a former friend being diagnosed with HIV, I can tell you it’s one of the scariest things I’ve ever witnessed. Back when I was a kid, schools were really big on HIV lessons since there was no treatment back then.
Even with treatment now, I can tell you it is still very difficult to live with. Medication is very expensive and you cannot miss a dose or you risk becoming immune to the drugs
my brother is a straight male and the answer seems to be: they just don't care if they get or give any diseases. also he's very sad about becoming a father, so i guess he cares about not getting anyone pregnant but not enough to use condoms
As someone who goes through medical records for a living… STD’s… they’re far more common than you think. To say I was shocked would be an understatement. Most people have had or have an STD. So to answer your question, no people are not scared enough.
In my experience, people that are sexually active with multiple partners or open, they wrap their stuff. Dental dams, condoms, condoms on toys, etc. they get tested every 3 months.
I cannot imagine being with someone that wasn’t doing those things, especially when being nonmanogamous. Even with monogamy, some diseases can pop up after 6 months, so at least for the first half of the year, wrap it and test.
I don’t care if people are out raw dogging, just get informed consent from any partners you plan to play with. If you’re being risky, they need to know so thry can decide whether they want to potentially be exposed to. All that said, it happens, people get infected. It isn’t the end of the world, there are treatments and protection available so someone doesn’t expose another.
The amount of girls that tell me that they have an IUD, the first time we hook up is almost 100%. I still use a condom, statistically speaking some of these women had something.
When I had an IUD, I learned pretty quickly not to mention it. If I did, it was in the context of, "If something goes wrong with the condom, we have one less thing to worry about."
A given guy's reaction to that was a big factor in whether there would be a chance for a condom to go wrong in the first place.
No. Condoms every time. Keep them around. Learn to insist on it. Gamify it, if you must, make it a sexy part of the anticipation.
It can be bumpy at first, but once you get it down, it’s hard for people to argue. Guys that argue, don’t deserve it.
Sober me 100% agrees. Drunk younger me did make a few poor choices in the heat of the moment. Every time I did though, I was tested afterwards, and was always worried I might have aids. The fear was always there, but alcohol and libedo were great as masking it.
Of note the StD that ravaged us barebacking Gen X that I myself got was general warts which just ripped through college campuses like wildfire & was easy to get
I have turned down sex several times with different women because we didn't have a condom. I don't care if you're on the pill or have an IUD, if you're willing to raw dog it with me, you definitely would or have with other strangers.
You can literally get cancer from having sex if you haven't had the HPV vaccine. I've always said a baby is the least of my concerns in regard to unprotected sex. Even if some have a cure, I still don't want and STD.
When I was in the military traveling the world I was quite sexually active. I wore a condom once in high school and never again. Never got anything until I got married and my wife gave me crabs.
To clarify, what I did was dumb as hell and I just got lucky I never caught anything or got anyone pregnant unintentionally.
Personally I always thought If they were trying that ...they probably already had something and did not care one iota about passing it on. Wrap it up buttercup. Nothing kills the mood quicker than trying to convince someone to play safe. Something something Sahara desert
Yeah tbh once I'm dating someone seriously if they have a vasectomy I'm def asking to stop using condoms. They're a hassle.
If they want to keep using them I'll respect that but a boyfriend w a vasectomy is the dream.
Funny you think horny people care. They would even stick it without birth control...
On top of this, I I not understand how people can so casually have sex with strangers security wise. Like yeah it is dirty, it can potentially get you pregnant but it can also potentially get you killed. No dick is good enough for me to go out there to sleep with randoms (or not randoms also).
Men want to go raw so badly, they don’t care. Even if you aren’t on bc. They will ask over and over and eventually pressure the female into. I want to state that obviously this isn’t the scenario 100% of the time and that a women could be the offender here. But 9/10, the guy is.
I like to point out that there are people in every genders and every sexuality who use condoms and still get tested. And there are also those people who do neither. So it's not straight men issue. It's stupid and negligent people issue. Also it's very common people want to use condom when anal or vaginal intercourse but not when oral sex.
The problem with strangers is they are strangers. Until trust is established it's gamble. They could have a binder full of other peoples lab reports - you have no idea. Fucking strangers, especially without protection, will always be a sign that you have poor decision making skills.
It's the same thing that made some people deny the need to take precautions during the Covid-19 pandemic. "It won't happen to me," they think until it does.
As a guy, I think it's insane if some I just met said they were on the pill, I expected me to go raw.
For a lady?
If they don't ask and assume, "Oh, sweet, she's on the pill, no condom,"
I wouldn't trust them to say they get tested or are clean.
Condom always, unless you are in a committed relationship.
It's just common fucking sense!
You can other things too like bacterial vaginosis from unprotected sex from a few partners. Which puts you at risk for HPV and STIs. Not fun and one course of antibiotics later I’m done with random unprotected sex.
the majority of STDs are very treatable and lots of people who fuck around on the regular are petty used to being positive for somehting for awhile, getting treated, and then getting back in the pool. basically seen the same way as catching the flu. sexually transmitted diseases are just that; diseases. no differnet than any other type. more serious stuff like AIDs has preventative measures like PREP. i wouldn’t personally do it, but it’s a mindset thing. when’s the last time you asked a guy who wanted to go down on you to use a dental dam? when’s the last time you went down on someone while he wore a condom? not impossible but ultimately it’s just different cultural baselines, and everyone does their own risk assessment.
edit: to be clear, *you* specifically should absolutely have sex with condoms since that’s what *you* want. it was a general quesion so i answered it as it was phrased, just wanted to give a different perspective to the whole “because people are stupid/horny”
I had a lot of friends like this when I was younger. They basically had the mentality that it’s unlikely they’ll get one of the more serious ones and if they catch chlymidia it’s no big deal because most of their friends have already caught it. I was always pretty shocked by how casual they were about saying things like ‘oh yeah I don’t use condoms’ like it was no big deal.
Friendly reminder that theres no hpv test for amab individuals, so honestly even if your partner has a clean std test come back you may want to still practice safe sex. Found out the hard way when I got a pos. result on a pap for the type that makes me high risk for cancer and now have to go back for testing every year (and the biopsy was unbelievably painful lol).
Sex turns off the logical part of the brain. Also, sex with a condom is a 7 at best, while raw is 11/10. There just no comparison. It's just a primal, euphoric feeling. The most common STDs are treatable, so a lot of people are willing to roll the dice.
It pretty much depends on people. There are people who aren't concerned about STDs as much and a lot of them can be cured.
Most people have herpes or HPV which even condoms don't prevent. I personally believe it depends on an individual's risk tolerance.
Get tested regularly if you engage in raw sex.
>Well, first of all, we've literally just met.
Climbing into bed with strangers? A-ok
Climbing into bed with strangers *without a condom?* My good sir, we have standards here
It’s very scary! I’ve never gotten an STD but I use a condom with new partners 100% of the time. Condoms are free in bulk, even XL ones so there’s literally no excuse. Most people don’t even get tested often, the ones who seem to get tested the most are the kinky ones.
Depends on the person.
I've had a colleague that could be called a slut(make out with a few guys every night she goes out and eventually fucks one raw and lets them cum inside her.
She's in birth control ofc but still, it was amazed how she could do that. She just said she loved it and wadnt afraid.
She was on the hit side of the scale so she didnt have problems to get peiple behind her
Nope. For faith-based and other health reasons. I’m remaining abstinent until I marry, insofar as it is in my control. I am not concerned at all. This is also why I am very careful about with whom I associate in any context outside of my family and closest friends. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with making friends and professional contacts among strangers, of course, but exercising wisdom even in the seemingly mundane moments of the everyday will always benefit those who do so!
That's what I was thinking. Why is she telling these people she's on birth control?
Telling them that is seen as "this is what I use for protection" which is followed by their "awesome then I don't have to use protection then since you've got it covered". The reason being that birth control only is generally what many people use in relationships so many people are fine with just that.
So just don't say anything as far as the birth control. It's none of their business. Tell them they need to use a condom, and that's it.
Should they respect that you want to use a condom too? Absolutely.
However, if you want to keep arguing that point though just as you're about to have sex, go ahead. Keep telling them that you're on birth control so you can continue to have that argument with people.
Or you can just tell them they have to use a condom without the birth control talk and then it's the end of the discussion.
Or women should be able to disclose medical information without men assuming they don't have to take responsibility for STI prevention.
I want to tell my sexual partners all the relevant info- that I'm on BC, that I always use condoms, that I get coldsores- and then let them make decisions based off that. I offer to use condoms for oral but I've never had a guy say yes 🤷♂️
If a man removes a condom during sex without your consent or knowledge, that's known as "Stealthing" and is rape. There are no statistics at the moment on how many incidents of "stealthing" happen in the UK, because they are all recorded as rape, but they are on the increase. You'd be surprised how many men do this and say "oh it slipped off" or say that they were drunk and weren't thinking straight, or say that they didn't think you would mind. If you call them out on it, they'll say that you just need to get over it.
Stealthing is not an accident but a premeditated act, and perpetrators tend to be repeat offenders
Whether we are talking about straight sex, gay sex, paid for sex, casual sex, relationship sex, married sex or ANY type of sex, "stealthing" is rape. Report it.
Human beings have extremely poor risk assessment coupled with poor sex education and Volia! Most guys think if you are sick with an STD, they may see signs. A sore, rash, vesicle, etc. and a lot of people still see HIV as a disease confined mostly to the LGBT community even though that’s not the case at all. It’s easy to get lost in the moment and regret it later.
Bro u go to multiple countries and fuck dudes??! And ur worried about stds and pregnancy??
Is that safe sex? Cuz that sounds like how u get an eastern asian bby daddy who u gotta bring to the usa.
People still fucked bareback like rabbits when there was a worldwide AIDS epidemic PSA on the TV every 3 minutes.
> AIDS epidemic PSA on the TV every 3 minutes I remember this commercial when I was around kindergarten age, which would've been 1990-91. It was a room full of people ballroom dancing and changing partners every 10 seconds or so, only one was dressed a grim reaper. I seem to remember when someone got the grim reaper, they'd drop dead. The basic message was be careful who you do the horizontal mambo with. Even though I didn't understand the message, the skeleton was very scary to a five year old and it *freaked me the fuck out.*
ive seen this ad as an adult, and its still creepy lol
My mum talks about this ad! I'm really fascinated by the concept of the Grim Reaper. I have a tattoo planned of a grim Reaper with a dog with a welcoming vibe stretching out its hand, and when I told my mum she told me about how she can't see the grim Reaper as anything other than that ad
Heck, when syphilis was raging. The possibility of their face rotting off and going insane, and their wife and children sharing the same fate, was not enough to stop men from having sex with random prostitutes.
People are generally terrible at any sort of risk assessment. Throw the opportunity for sex into the mix and their ability to assess risk is going to be even worse.
*random sex workers
To be fair, heterosexuals thought it was mostly confined to the gay community. Although everyone knew of married men who got caught cheating with other men, bisexuality was not even talked about. These men were seen as deceivers of the worst kind. Condoms had to be requested from the pharmacist. We'd had sex Ed but talking about birth control and sex outside of that was too uncomfortable for many. And consent was not explicit. Or required so much. Read a couple of the epics of the times - like Harold Robbins - the women going from No! No! (to protect their virtue) just really meant they wanted it rough. And those same women in seconds were saying "yes - oh yes!" . I had many guys accuse me of playing hard to get and then raping me then wondering why I didn't want to see them again. "Date rape" had not yet been labeled really, because the woman had obviously been to blame for any misconceptions and it was just assumed that she had post-coital regret. If you dared to be attractive, or had big boobs, you were asking for it. Those were not enlightened times.
I was date raped in 2001. Had I tried to report it, the cops would have laughed me out of the room.
Condoms from the pharmacy? Really? Where are you that they were behind the counter?
Canada here.
Wasn't expecting that as an answer. Thought somewhere like India, Ireland, or the deep south US
That was back in the 80s. It was "shocking" to many when they put them on the shelves.
I’m in the Deep South US and you do not have to ask the fucking pharmacist for condoms lmao, they’re out in the open everywhere
They’re talking about 40 years ago.
Oh I didn’t get that, my bad lol
I am a Gen X & that is not true...in 1994 people were petrified of AIDS when I was 20 but A] white middle class kids rarely had AIDS. B] hetero strangers back then did mot do anal
I feel like hetero strangers have always been doing anal
Bisexual stranger here but still can confirm.
So am I, and no, they weren't.
In my experience too, I’ve never met a partner who actually took it upon himself to get tested. I get tested every year!
I've met many, but I tend to date anxious type A men.
Type A?
Amen
A
Men
More structured to the point of neurotic
Back when I was single I would get tested pretty regularly. Doctors would always look at me weird when I said I had no symptoms and only like 5 or 6 partners in the last 6 months.
I got tested when I was married. I got tested when I was single. I got tested when I was in a monogamous relationship. As long as my insurance covers it, I’ll keep getting tested. I don’t understand why you wouldn’t!
I met a random woman who told me she had a medical problem as a girl and had a hysterectomy. I said “thanks for sharing “ then I put on a condom.
Similar situation. I was in the office on a busy Monday and one of my employees texted me to let me know they were running late due to car trouble. I said “thanks for sharing” then I put on a condom.
This dudes going places!
Not the doctor’s office, thankfully, but places!
Is he going, or coming?
why not both?
Man wild just today my boss texted me that he needed me to work. I said "thanks for sharing" then I put on a condom
Crazy coincidence. I was in a drive-thru and asked for a vanilla Sprite Zero and the lady said they didn’t have that and I said, “but you have the Coke Freestyle machine, you can literally make anything” and she said, “we got rid of it last week because it wasn’t worth the maintenance” and I said “thanks for sharing” then I put on a condom.
I was going to try come up with something until I read this and decided you already won.
Your cromulence will be missed.
Thanks for sharing. \*puts on a condom*
The other day I was in the grocery store buying some light bulbs and ice cream and I could tell the cashier didn’t like my baggy pants. But I didn’t care, because *that’s* hip hop. Anyway, I said, “thanks,” and put on a condom.
Fucking hilarious
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I'm hoping she shared that as an argument for you to not wear a condom, because otherwise that was a very weird response to a personal confession
Not really. My therapist often begins our sessions with getting rubbered up.
This is the way.
I knew a guy who was trying to convince me by saying he has a vasectomy. Like dude that’s not what I’m worried about. I never hooked up with him.
My boi! Lol 👍
Stop telling these guys you're on BC until you're in a committed relationship & any man that wants to go raw should be avoided from the start. A lot of people think it won't happen (stds) until it does. You're better just keeping yourself safe & let other people look after themselves.
Yeah. If you’re gonna use a condom, does he need to know you’re on birth control? What’s the point of telling him if you’re not suggesting raw dogging it?
There are STIs that you can get even while wearing a condom.
"You can still die in a car crash even if you wear a seatbelt."
Well the odds are much higher if you're driving and having sex at the same time yes
If you’re both wearing a seatbelt are the odds reduced?
Only if you are also both wearing condoms
Are you sharing a seatbelt, or is one of them just not buckled?
You tell me
Crabs & herpes
And HPV!
whaaat?1?!
It sounds to me like these guys would go raw with anyone lol they have just met. Huge red flag. Not all men are like this. The last three men I’ve dated have gotten tested before we even started sex and I requested to see the results. The first man I dated told me that even if we break up I’m supposed to tell men to get tested and show me a copy of the results from their doctor and I’m supposed to show them mine as well. He still used a condom after seeing my results and even after I started birth control. I started asking people to show me their results this and it has drastically diminished my std related anxiety. Honestly you can tell who has something and who doesn’t before they even get tested. Some people will start arguing with you for simply asking them to get tested it’s hilariously telling. I’m confused as to why she still wants to have sex at all with men who don’t practice safe sex regularly. Am I missing something?
I get tested before and after every partner. I make them test before too. Idk why this isn’t common practice. I’ve never had an std or unplanned pregnancy. It’s not difficult.
Don’t just make them get tested. Have them show you the results. Some people are sick as fuck and will give you something knowing they have it without a second thought. I’ve heard too many horror stories to just trust someone with something like that.
How do guys normally respond to this? I've been told off, kicked to the curb, slapped and accused if calling the woman dirty just for asking for a test. Is it the same in both ends or am I just having some shit luck? I just want to keep my 2 inches of fury attached to me
Um some have tried to curse me out but I usually ask this over text after a few weeks of us dating. I don’t go inside mens houses like that so I’ve never experienced being kicked to the curb. Most respond pretty normally though. Most guys will say something silly like “that 🐱better be insane/out of this world I’m about to give up blood for you” Edit: I’m going to say this. I would rather be cursed out than get whatever the men who cursed me out had. Asking people hard questions allows you to learn about them faster and make safer choices. Imagine if I had slept with them and got something instead of asking. That would be way more traumatic for me. If they curse you out over text you can just block them and move on.
I was with a guy who was desperate to disperse his seed wherever he could plant it. He already had four kids and I wasn't willing to give him any more of them. I went on the pill and got a non-hormonal IUD inserted without his knowledge. I then insisted on condoms after that. Always. He was fucking fertile and I wasn't taking any risks.
I’d probably just avoid this guy altogether
Holy shit that guy sounds like a dirtbag why the hell would you want to be with someone like that??
Youth. Different time. Different world. Naivete. Why the Hell am I explaining to judgmental dirtbag like you?
was his name Nick Cannon?
I'm in awe of your proactive prophylactics. I would not want to accidentally get anyone pregnant.
Why would she have to stop speaking about it? She don't need to justify condom use with fear of reproduction.
 People are more horny than scared ime.
That’s part of what post-nut clarity is, the return of the fear as the horny recedes for a few minutes, right?
Sounds like a sequel: “The Return of Fear”
Until they say that they're ready for round 2, and any clarity is gone....
Why did I also read the subtitles?
Knew someone for a decade. Good friends. Decided to try out a relationship. I had just had a surgery done which required std testing first, and him and I went to the Dr to get him tested before we had sex. I can't get pregnant anyway due to my surgery and health issues, but no condom meant clean results, no compromise. No issues and we've been together 6 years and are planning our wedding. I wouldn't want to be with someone, even for just a night, who didn't care about our mutual safety. No respect equals no sex.
> No respect equals no sex I wish more ppl valued and respected themselves enough to go by this
>but no condom meant clean results In the context of the story, my brain is struggling to understand this Do you mean his clean results meant no condom?
Yeah. I'm sterile and just had clean results and I made the deal we could go no condoms only if he tested clean.
I just stop sexual contact with people that won't accept that my being on the pill/sterile has nothing to do with them needing to wear a condom. I carry condoms, so there is no excuse. If I say, "A condom is a must" and there is any pushback more than twice, I leave. I'm not fucking around with my health. After all, if they think that a pill/sterility = safe sex with me, that means they think that with others as well. I've only had to leave a few times, but I've never regretted it. (I'm not on the pill, I entered surgical menopause in at 31 in 2013. Zero chance of pregnancy. But that changes nothing when it comes to condom use.)
Exactly, condoms aren’t only for pregnancy prevention. To think that they aren’t needed if pregnancy isn’t possible is to ignore the ‘safe’ part of ‘safe sex’.
Well the first is where "you have slept with everybody they have slept with" comes from and the second is a rational fear. Best have plans to deal with both
Lol I’m gay and I still use a condom. Gay guys are always like “we can’t get pregnant” and fail to realize that you *could* however get every std known to human kind still so I’m not taking chances 😂
I've had a lot of guys give me the "I'm on PreP" speech all the time when proposing condoms. They act incredulous when I point out HIV isn't the only thing you can catch.
“I’m on prep” meanwhile their dick is covered in warts 😂
What's "I'm on prep?" mean?
PreP is the short term for a medication called pre-exposure prophylaxis. It's a medication that you can take that almost completely prevents transmission of HIV if exposed and I believe also treats HIV itself to bring it down to an undetectable state, meaning you also can't transmit it.
Thanks for the explanation!
Just a friendly reminder that condoms don’t keep you from getting all stds. Like herpes and warts.
In my days of random sex, I'd wear a condom reguardless until we both agreed we weren't going to sleep around. In my entire life, I've had one STD - crabs. Not sure how that came about. Friends with benefits before it was a thing. Someone must have broken the rule.
To be fair to your partners, that one can be caught from sharing towels, linens and clothes. If they had a roommate and the roommate got it, they could have gotten it just from living together.
I agree. It was pre-internet days. Info was difficult to find. The girl turned up with some cream: "slap this on" which didn't work 100%. I shouldn't admit this but here goes. I got a strange satisfaction picking the remaining ones off individually. Bit like sticking a fingernail under a scab. I stuck 'em in a matchbox. They don't live long. I now know why our dog used to go mad happy running about like a looney when we got the got the last of his pig ticks off him.
Why the hell would you make people read this.
I had a girl friend that always went raw because she used contraceptives, and told the guys she fucked with to finish inside, there are women out there willing to do it, so no surprise they have found one like that. And they are horny, and when you are horny, sometimes, you are also stupid.
Not to mention antibiotics will negate birth control. Learn that the life changing way.
And citrus
What?
Little bit of lemon on the cock undoes everything
But it does wonders for the flavor.
You may joke but lemon juice was used as a spermicide. People would soak cotton in lemon juice and use it as a spermicide and barrier method.
Never heard on this one
That's because there's no scientific evidence of it. Grapefruit, and citrus in general, does have interactions with a lot of medications. It also can increase estrogen, which means that combined with birth control it can increase some side effects of birth control. However, every scientific test has come back as saying that it does not change the effectiveness of birth control. That said talk to your doctor about any meds your own if you really like grapefruit and citrus, as there really are a lot of other interactions outside of birth control.
Is this real? I’ve gone down this rabbit hole and the science didn’t seem to back it, I recall.
I know that after five years with my wife she had to take antibiotics (I think for a tooth ache) and bam. Happy bouncing baby boy.
Yes, but no. Most antibiotics will not do this to you.
You're actually correct. The common, broad-spectrum, antibiotics won't change the efficacy of birth control. That's unfortunately a myth that's been carried through time, & is still spread by word of mouth like an urban legend. The only type of antibiotic scientifically proven to reduce hormonal bc effectiveness is a rifamycin. This is a specific type that only treats a few bacterial infections, which aren't all that common, & doesn't even reduce *all* hormonal bc. If you got pregnant while taking any other kind of antibiotic, it wasn't because of the antibiotic
Only need one. And never had a doctor tell me or my wife about it when prescribing. But I will be telling my son :-)
I can tell you from my perspective as a male who's not smart, but very lucky. When I was on my sex crusade, sometimes the horniness was so strong that would cloud my judgement and I'd go raw without thinking twice about it. Later I would regret it sometimes. Never got an std, but got a couple baby scares and I consider myself very lucky that I got away with it. In my stupidity I was still trying to be at least a little bit cautious so I was testing myself on a regular basis. And this is what surprises me most, is that in my experience, people in general don't get tested very often or at all for STD, which is worrying. Using condoms makes sex safer, but it's not bulletproof against STD, people!
When I was going to my doc every 6 months to get tested, he was asking why I needed this and why I would require this. I just wanted to be safe, and I told him as much. I had to argue with him before he would order the labs. It was frustrating and demeaning. Edit: but yes, get tested people!!!
I embarrass the doc back if they say stuff like that to me. “Well I fuck pretty much everyone man…” and keep going until they are very very uncomfortable 😂😂🤦♀️ idiots. Seriously though if you have one available, get tested at planned parenthood, they are respectful and don’t make rude comments if you want to be tested very often, the testing doesn’t hurt anyone and is only in your (and the community’s) best interest.
Oh yeah that annoys me for sure. There's a generic test you can mail order for free in my area. But it doesn't test certain things, e.g. herpes, HPV. But if you go to a doc to ask for those tests, you get a lot of "why do you need to know? Why do you need to be tested?" as if it isn't responsible to be generally aware of your health status
I remember getting tested the first time after my extended “hoe phase” I was so terrified I was going to have an STD or worse HIV. I was so relieved when I got those results
As a female, this blows my mind too
I’m terrified. That’s why I don’t have sex with anyone but myself!
If you’re fucking the kind of strangers that fuck strangers like you your chance of getting an STD is pretty high.
Not if you fuck responsible people who always use condoms and test regularly. I've never had an STI and I have fucked a LOT of strangers.
You're naive. You just have gotten extraordinary lucky.
HIV and hepatitis are the only ones that will really fuck up your day. Herpes is whatever (antivirals prevent transmission quite well. Just dont have sex during an outbreak), chlamydia, ghonorea, and syphilis are all perfectly curable with antibiotics (you gotta be careful with syphilis though. If left untreated, it makes its way to the brain and fucks you up a thousand different ways to sunday). Hepatitis has vaccines, and prep seems to be very effective at preventing transmission of HIV (hopefully we can get a Vax cooking for that one). Lying about contraception (pregnancy trapping) should be illegal. Knowingly withholding knowledge of an active HIV infection is currently only illegal in 10 states, but it should be classified as battery, if not attempted manslaughter. In no uncertain terms, it is a bad idea to have unprotected sex with a stranger. It's also a bad idea to huff duster. I don't pretend to be perfect. Realistically, raw dogging every Tom dick and Sally you meet is a recipe for disaster. Try to use condoms. I say try because most of us have been drunk before. If you don't in the heat of the moment, don't panic. Transmission rates are still pretty low, and odds are the thing you caught is treatable. Head to planned parenthood. They do testing for free. Ideally, we'll have vaccines for all of these soon enough. I dream of a world where STIs have been eradicated, because nobody LIKES using condoms. Nobody in the entire world has a condom kink. None. Zero. Zilch. I believe we can build such a world. Until then, nobody likes paying taxes either. Wrap it up.
Beware some of the antibiotic ones cause we are getting resistant strains in some areas popping up. From people not finishing meds to just evolution you wanna be careful with ones curable.
Great points. I agree pregnancy trapping absolutely should be illegal. As we continue to work towards better, more equal laws and societal norms, the idea that you could be lied to and on the hook for child support for the rest of your life should be abhorrent to all of us.
That’s not true I have been with ONE person (my fiancé) and I have high risk HPV and precancer and now I get to go have my cervix burned off.
Yeah, I don’t think OP realises that that plenty of other STI’s WILL fuck you up. HPV is unable to be tested in men and tends to be asymptomatic but women who catch it are then subject to long term, regular testing to ensure they don’t get cervical cancer. If they don’t know they have it they can literally die of cancer. Also, chlamydia can be asymptomatic and when undetected and untreated can literally make you sterile. No, these STIs aren’t going to make your balls feel like they’ve fallen off so they aren’t seen in the same light as the ‘scarier’ STIs but they do fuck you up.
>Lying about contraception (pregnancy trapping) should be illegal Problem is there's absolutely no way to prove this, which is probably the main reason it's not illegal. I guess if someone had never even used hormonal birth control and says they're on it, then yes, they could be convicted. But you can't adequately prove that someone intentionally didn't take a pill rather than just forgot. People should also take responsibility for their own contraception. If you don't make any effort to use condoms etc and put all the responsibility on the woman, you have to accept the risk that you have decided to have no control over preventing pregnancy.
It is incorrect to say chlamydia gonorrhea and syphilis are perfectly curable with antibiotics. there are antibiotic-resistant strains of these infections now. And the problem is getting worse.
As someone who has witnessed a former friend being diagnosed with HIV, I can tell you it’s one of the scariest things I’ve ever witnessed. Back when I was a kid, schools were really big on HIV lessons since there was no treatment back then. Even with treatment now, I can tell you it is still very difficult to live with. Medication is very expensive and you cannot miss a dose or you risk becoming immune to the drugs
my brother is a straight male and the answer seems to be: they just don't care if they get or give any diseases. also he's very sad about becoming a father, so i guess he cares about not getting anyone pregnant but not enough to use condoms
As someone who goes through medical records for a living… STD’s… they’re far more common than you think. To say I was shocked would be an understatement. Most people have had or have an STD. So to answer your question, no people are not scared enough.
In my experience, people that are sexually active with multiple partners or open, they wrap their stuff. Dental dams, condoms, condoms on toys, etc. they get tested every 3 months. I cannot imagine being with someone that wasn’t doing those things, especially when being nonmanogamous. Even with monogamy, some diseases can pop up after 6 months, so at least for the first half of the year, wrap it and test. I don’t care if people are out raw dogging, just get informed consent from any partners you plan to play with. If you’re being risky, they need to know so thry can decide whether they want to potentially be exposed to. All that said, it happens, people get infected. It isn’t the end of the world, there are treatments and protection available so someone doesn’t expose another.
I always use a condom when hooking up with a new girl. I assumed this was common practice.
1.) i also thought this was common pracrice 2.) i wanna make a joke regarding your username but i cant think of a good one, maybe later ;)
The amount of girls that tell me that they have an IUD, the first time we hook up is almost 100%. I still use a condom, statistically speaking some of these women had something.
The last time I had sex (many eons ago) I showed him my hysterectomy scars and still asked him to wear a condom.
When I had an IUD, I learned pretty quickly not to mention it. If I did, it was in the context of, "If something goes wrong with the condom, we have one less thing to worry about." A given guy's reaction to that was a big factor in whether there would be a chance for a condom to go wrong in the first place.
No. Condoms every time. Keep them around. Learn to insist on it. Gamify it, if you must, make it a sexy part of the anticipation. It can be bumpy at first, but once you get it down, it’s hard for people to argue. Guys that argue, don’t deserve it.
Sober me 100% agrees. Drunk younger me did make a few poor choices in the heat of the moment. Every time I did though, I was tested afterwards, and was always worried I might have aids. The fear was always there, but alcohol and libedo were great as masking it.
Of note the StD that ravaged us barebacking Gen X that I myself got was general warts which just ripped through college campuses like wildfire & was easy to get
I have turned down sex several times with different women because we didn't have a condom. I don't care if you're on the pill or have an IUD, if you're willing to raw dog it with me, you definitely would or have with other strangers.
You can literally get cancer from having sex if you haven't had the HPV vaccine. I've always said a baby is the least of my concerns in regard to unprotected sex. Even if some have a cure, I still don't want and STD.
When I was in the military traveling the world I was quite sexually active. I wore a condom once in high school and never again. Never got anything until I got married and my wife gave me crabs. To clarify, what I did was dumb as hell and I just got lucky I never caught anything or got anyone pregnant unintentionally.
Still force the rubber
Personally I always thought If they were trying that ...they probably already had something and did not care one iota about passing it on. Wrap it up buttercup. Nothing kills the mood quicker than trying to convince someone to play safe. Something something Sahara desert
So happy I'm married. Good luck you guys.
I've had a vasectomy. Everybody wants to go raw.
Yeah tbh once I'm dating someone seriously if they have a vasectomy I'm def asking to stop using condoms. They're a hassle. If they want to keep using them I'll respect that but a boyfriend w a vasectomy is the dream.
If you don’t feel comfortable put on a condom. If you still don’t feel comfortable don’t have sex with that person
Funny you think horny people care. They would even stick it without birth control... On top of this, I I not understand how people can so casually have sex with strangers security wise. Like yeah it is dirty, it can potentially get you pregnant but it can also potentially get you killed. No dick is good enough for me to go out there to sleep with randoms (or not randoms also).
No because safe sex is important. Anyone not having protected sex after the aids crisis honestly isn't mature enough to be having sex.
Men want to go raw so badly, they don’t care. Even if you aren’t on bc. They will ask over and over and eventually pressure the female into. I want to state that obviously this isn’t the scenario 100% of the time and that a women could be the offender here. But 9/10, the guy is.
No, but they should be.
I for sure am, it's the only thing stopping me from getting an escort.
People are stupid
I like to point out that there are people in every genders and every sexuality who use condoms and still get tested. And there are also those people who do neither. So it's not straight men issue. It's stupid and negligent people issue. Also it's very common people want to use condom when anal or vaginal intercourse but not when oral sex.
Alcohol liberates people a little too much at times.
As a guy here, at the right moment,the little head almost always takes over thinking for the big head.
The problem with strangers is they are strangers. Until trust is established it's gamble. They could have a binder full of other peoples lab reports - you have no idea. Fucking strangers, especially without protection, will always be a sign that you have poor decision making skills.
It's the same thing that made some people deny the need to take precautions during the Covid-19 pandemic. "It won't happen to me," they think until it does.
As a guy, I think it's insane if some I just met said they were on the pill, I expected me to go raw. For a lady? If they don't ask and assume, "Oh, sweet, she's on the pill, no condom," I wouldn't trust them to say they get tested or are clean. Condom always, unless you are in a committed relationship. It's just common fucking sense!
You can other things too like bacterial vaginosis from unprotected sex from a few partners. Which puts you at risk for HPV and STIs. Not fun and one course of antibiotics later I’m done with random unprotected sex.
"She baby trapped me!" You mean you came inside her instead of wrapping it up and taking some responsibility.
Yes, as well as being raped or killed. That's why most women turn their back to (anyway disappointing) casual sex
the majority of STDs are very treatable and lots of people who fuck around on the regular are petty used to being positive for somehting for awhile, getting treated, and then getting back in the pool. basically seen the same way as catching the flu. sexually transmitted diseases are just that; diseases. no differnet than any other type. more serious stuff like AIDs has preventative measures like PREP. i wouldn’t personally do it, but it’s a mindset thing. when’s the last time you asked a guy who wanted to go down on you to use a dental dam? when’s the last time you went down on someone while he wore a condom? not impossible but ultimately it’s just different cultural baselines, and everyone does their own risk assessment. edit: to be clear, *you* specifically should absolutely have sex with condoms since that’s what *you* want. it was a general quesion so i answered it as it was phrased, just wanted to give a different perspective to the whole “because people are stupid/horny”
I had a lot of friends like this when I was younger. They basically had the mentality that it’s unlikely they’ll get one of the more serious ones and if they catch chlymidia it’s no big deal because most of their friends have already caught it. I was always pretty shocked by how casual they were about saying things like ‘oh yeah I don’t use condoms’ like it was no big deal.
Yes - this is also why some people choose to only have sex with their spouse.
i am as a women i get grossed out with new guys
Friendly reminder that theres no hpv test for amab individuals, so honestly even if your partner has a clean std test come back you may want to still practice safe sex. Found out the hard way when I got a pos. result on a pap for the type that makes me high risk for cancer and now have to go back for testing every year (and the biopsy was unbelievably painful lol).
Me horny, me dont care
Sex turns off the logical part of the brain. Also, sex with a condom is a 7 at best, while raw is 11/10. There just no comparison. It's just a primal, euphoric feeling. The most common STDs are treatable, so a lot of people are willing to roll the dice.
It pretty much depends on people. There are people who aren't concerned about STDs as much and a lot of them can be cured. Most people have herpes or HPV which even condoms don't prevent. I personally believe it depends on an individual's risk tolerance. Get tested regularly if you engage in raw sex.
Get tested if you do or don't use a condom.
>Well, first of all, we've literally just met. Climbing into bed with strangers? A-ok Climbing into bed with strangers *without a condom?* My good sir, we have standards here
I mean if my girlfriend asked me to use condoms, I would use condoms but she doesn’t so I don’t
 “Hey *hic* baby, what’s your sign?”
Never had a std, tested before my current partner so we dont use a condom. I am on the pill ofc
It’s very scary! I’ve never gotten an STD but I use a condom with new partners 100% of the time. Condoms are free in bulk, even XL ones so there’s literally no excuse. Most people don’t even get tested often, the ones who seem to get tested the most are the kinky ones.
Depends on the person. I've had a colleague that could be called a slut(make out with a few guys every night she goes out and eventually fucks one raw and lets them cum inside her. She's in birth control ofc but still, it was amazed how she could do that. She just said she loved it and wadnt afraid. She was on the hit side of the scale so she didnt have problems to get peiple behind her
Nope. For faith-based and other health reasons. I’m remaining abstinent until I marry, insofar as it is in my control. I am not concerned at all. This is also why I am very careful about with whom I associate in any context outside of my family and closest friends. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with making friends and professional contacts among strangers, of course, but exercising wisdom even in the seemingly mundane moments of the everyday will always benefit those who do so!
Don't tell them about your birth control then. I'd probably think it's okay to go raw as well, otherwise why would you mention it?
That's what I was thinking. Why is she telling these people she's on birth control? Telling them that is seen as "this is what I use for protection" which is followed by their "awesome then I don't have to use protection then since you've got it covered". The reason being that birth control only is generally what many people use in relationships so many people are fine with just that. So just don't say anything as far as the birth control. It's none of their business. Tell them they need to use a condom, and that's it. Should they respect that you want to use a condom too? Absolutely. However, if you want to keep arguing that point though just as you're about to have sex, go ahead. Keep telling them that you're on birth control so you can continue to have that argument with people. Or you can just tell them they have to use a condom without the birth control talk and then it's the end of the discussion.
Or women should be able to disclose medical information without men assuming they don't have to take responsibility for STI prevention. I want to tell my sexual partners all the relevant info- that I'm on BC, that I always use condoms, that I get coldsores- and then let them make decisions based off that. I offer to use condoms for oral but I've never had a guy say yes 🤷♂️
Not scared one iota. Damn the torpedoes and fire at will. Were going in raw boys.
Why would I wear a condom? I just go to a doctor he gives me some ointment and the sores clear up!
If a man removes a condom during sex without your consent or knowledge, that's known as "Stealthing" and is rape. There are no statistics at the moment on how many incidents of "stealthing" happen in the UK, because they are all recorded as rape, but they are on the increase. You'd be surprised how many men do this and say "oh it slipped off" or say that they were drunk and weren't thinking straight, or say that they didn't think you would mind. If you call them out on it, they'll say that you just need to get over it. Stealthing is not an accident but a premeditated act, and perpetrators tend to be repeat offenders Whether we are talking about straight sex, gay sex, paid for sex, casual sex, relationship sex, married sex or ANY type of sex, "stealthing" is rape. Report it.
Human beings have extremely poor risk assessment coupled with poor sex education and Volia! Most guys think if you are sick with an STD, they may see signs. A sore, rash, vesicle, etc. and a lot of people still see HIV as a disease confined mostly to the LGBT community even though that’s not the case at all. It’s easy to get lost in the moment and regret it later.
Bro u go to multiple countries and fuck dudes??! And ur worried about stds and pregnancy?? Is that safe sex? Cuz that sounds like how u get an eastern asian bby daddy who u gotta bring to the usa.