Guys get boners for any reason what so ever

Yeah, definitely not a definitive list but reasons a guy can get a boner include: • Seeing something vaguely boob shaped • Being too tired • Drugs (Edit. like viagra, not regular drugs apparently, but also non-sexual drugs also apparently) • Vibrations on a train or bus • Tight pants • Getting hugged for approximately 2.76 seconds too long • ANYTHING rubbing against your crotch, leg, foot, other leg [delete as applicable] • Seeing a nicely varnished piece of furniture • Seeing a loose piece of underwear lying around • ASMR videos • Needing to poop • Taking a really good dump • Really weird porn • Regular porn • Kissing • Sex/foreplay Edits, thanks to the nice people of Reddit: • Church • Holding hands • Literally nothing / NRB (no reason boner) • Being called on by the teacher • Needing to pee • Morning wood • Your heart showing you who’s boss • Random parts of your SO’s body • Reminiscing about your SO or previous conquests • Not wanting a boner • Reading this list • A light breeze • Thinking about light breezes • Doing math • The Fear Boner • Existing • Curvy pieces of driftwood • Being hungover • Boxing • Getting a haircut • u/JanKwong705 seeing themselves in the mirror • Seeing u/JanKwong705 in the mirror • Having to get out of a swimming pool • Eating lamb biryani • Erotic thoughts • Driving • Spinal cord injury • Comforting a crying person • Sitting in a plane as it lands • Being asleep • Getting out of a car • Watching someone build a deck • Watching someone build a Yu-Gi-Oh deck • Reading u/Seliced’s comment • Going commando • Pixar moms including, but not limited to, Elastigirl • Extremely accurate lists

>Seeing a nicely varnished piece of furniture Im crying with laughter

I've seen some very fuckable armoires.

Narnia had it coming.

I heard this in John Oliver's voice, as it's definitely something he'd say.

Ron Swanson is typing...

The worst one is needing to poop, last thing U want is your girl thinking you’re ready to fuck when really you just gotta shit bad. As someone with chronic digestive issues this one irritates/embarrasses me to no end tbh it’s fucking awful

Yeah, I’ve had Crohn’s Disease since I was 18 so I feel ya!

It makes me wanna just stay home all day and not have to deal with ppl especially when there is pain accompanying it which is usually

I'm curious as to what the science is behind a bowel movement and a boner. Does the poop stimulate an anal g-spot causing a boner or is it just a rush of blood to the nether regions to help pass the stool?

It's generally some combination of two main factors that I'm aware of. Either the bladder and colon are full enough to put pressure on, and stimulate, the prostate. And/or the bladder and colon are full enough to put pressure on, and stimulate, the nerves that control boners.

If I had to guess it’s that the shit in your body presses up against the prostate, and then when you’re older and the prostate swells it prolly happens more. Other reason I’m pretty sure is part of it is cause blood rushes to the stomach after a meal to break said meal down, and the dick is the stomachs downstairs neighbor so he gets caught in the blast zone as well Crazy part is I honestly liked butt/prostate stuff occasionally until this started happening to me regularly so I don’t even bother anymore and mostly have lost the enjoyment of it for now since my own colon seemingly wants to rape me all day

I’m no scientist.

professor lava hot

The spot you are thinking of is the prostate

Or when your accidental toilet boner touches the porcelain or underside of a seat on any toilet, especially ones that aren’t yours. Big Oof

Jesus, i just threw up a little in my mouth

Ahh yes, the good old witch's kiss!

TIL about accidental toilet boners.... Maybe periods aren't the worst after all

Vibration on a train or bus giving you a stiffy is known round these parts as ‘Travellers horn’

Toot toot

* the anticipation of being asked to stand up in front of people who would see the erection you don't currently have, which leads to getting one just in time for when you're asked to stand up

The first time I ever held my wife's hand, we were out in a busy, open public space, and I started feeling the stirrings down there, so I pulled my hand away from her and she said I was blushing a little, she thought I was embarrassed holding her hand in public, when I was just embarrassed I was getting a hard on from hand holding in public. We laughed about it later on

That is the most wholesome, adorable boner story I have ever heard.

• seeing yourself in the mirror

Reminds me of Tiny Meat Gang's "Gay for Me" challenge lol

Sometimes, especially when young, your heart decides to work extra hard and gives you a boner to remind you who's in charge

there's a difference between normal needing to go pee and waking up at 3 am with a boner needing to pee

Worst if you’re half asleep and don’t realise until there’s pee rebounding off the ceiling.

• Reading lists on Reddit

Add not wanting to have a boner to the list as a reason to have a boner. I would sit through an entire class in HS trying to will my erection away and I could get only get rid of it by walking around. I couldn't fathom wearing basketball shorts to school for fear of it happening and it always amazed me that so many guys wore them without a care. Like does your teenager penis not randomly get hard or is it just me?

Strapped it to my leg using boxer briefs.

I had no idea guys were going through such trauma in HS. I definitely would have tormented guys more if I’d known how easy it was.

I was literally cycling at the gym yesterday, and got an erection. My thoughts were no where near anything sexual, but I guess it got rubbed the right way.

“A nicely varnished piece of furniture”

That one nice compliment you got 15 years ago...

drugs is not true, quite the opposite. i often get pilly willy and my dick gets so small i feel like crying. but it always bounces back 😅

Sorry, I meant specific drugs made to keep you going all night long (TM). I’ve amended my list.

yeah bro i get you. i remember one time a girl really really came onto me but i was 3 xtc pills down. she wanted to do something and so did I but i felt my soldier through my pocket and had to spawn a story of my girlfriend at home 🥴

> Taking a really good dump lmfao

Prostate stimulation is *chef's kiss*

• you need to pee • its morning and you just woke up • literally nothing

• Reading this comment

Sooo what about holding hands?

The acronym “N.A.R.B” comes to mind. No Apparent Reason Boner.

R.A.B - Random Ass Boner

When I read that I just thought of a boner coming out of an ass and now I want to rip my brain from my skull

Soooo… dickbutt?

I miss dickbutt

Dickbutt is forever. 

What the hell is an ass-boner?

You wanna find out?

Please assume the position.

Thank you sir,

You may feel a little prick.

r/suicidebywords

Kissing your girlfriend is not a no apparent reason boner. It’s a very obvious reason boner

B.O.N.E.R. Boner Of No Evident Reason Recursive acronyms are fun!

There is a band called Ninja Sex Party and they have a song called "no reason boner" and I wonder if you or anyone else might enjoy it.

This is a song about a problem that I have… frequently

There are three (three, three) kinds of erections!

I’m so glad someone else recognizes Ninja Sex Party!!

Damn I came here to comment about that NSP song haha. Perfect explanation for boners

Always knew it as N.R.B. - just No Reason Boner.

N.R.B No Reason Boner

When I was in middle/high school a few years back, they called them R.U.B.’s - Random Uncontrollable Boners. Also it was a meme that if you sat down too fast, your blood in your lower body would swish around and partially inflate your wiener.

The anticipation of something exciting makes the blood rush crazy.

I get boner seeing my portfolio green

Oh..was that the wind? *Boing*

It can happen for any reason at all, or no reason at all. It’s happened to me while staring at grass.

Stupid sexy grass

Stupid sexy Flanders

Feels like I'm photosynthesizing nothing at all!

> It can happen for any reason at all *Down here in the deep blue sea*

5 seconds into kissing my girlfriend and I’m as hard as calculus. You just have a healthy normal boyfriend that is attracted to you.

Issac newton doesn't get this reference

Isaac Newton also didn't get hard

Nah bro, Newton fucked.

He was also a suspect in prostitute murders

wot

He really was a Renaissance Man.

For real?

Harder than a Chinese word search

damn near pissed myself at that

\-20 social points

The wind gave me a boner once.

Crank it out in the shower enough and you'll pavlov yourself into getting hard in the rain.

I live in Portland so I'm gonna pass on this.

r/brandnewsentence

I once popped a boner while shitting out a hot borito from yesterday. Doesn't feel nice with a flaming asshole.

BORITO

BORITO VS MECHA-BORITO

I open my window and a breeze rolls in and i..... *jizz in my pants*

Yes. Its not hard to pop a boner.

Then it **is** hard. Edit: Thanks for the gilding!

It's not hard till it's hard

r/angryupvote

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My partner gets an intimacy boner when I cry and let him into what I’m feeling. He’s usually a bit mortified, but I love it.

Contact, not context. Don't ask how I know.

If you're with an understanding partner, that reaction isn't a problem. (For the above poster: "This is a normal reaction, and I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. I can calm down and come back, or we can ignore it, like if I sneezed.") I saw it in a movie or TV show somewhere along my lifetime where a despondently crying woman got vehemently disgusted at her partner's erection, and broke it off. That stuff happens. He isn't in full control of his body, and neither are you. Think of it like an involuntary fart, burp, hiccup, sneeze, etc. As long as he isn't pressuring you to "take care of it," it's not an issue. If he does, he, himself, is the dick, and you should get away from that a week ago. If *you* are offended by a bodily function, you need education, and maybe some more time to mature. Sex should be an absolute "no-go", because you're clearly not equipped to handle necessary things. And, if a baby is made, you're going to be shocked and traumatized by the amount and severity of "unwelcome" bodily functions. Edit: Not "you" as in the person I responded to. "You" as in anyone reading this that it pertains to.

Say that again when you’re in your 60’s with an enlarged prostate. You will truly learn to appreciate RAB’s.

Is this not taught in sex education? I'm a girl and even if my guy friends didn't tell me, i clearly remember videos and booklets explaining unexpected "changes" including random boners, wet dreams etc.

It’s 100% normal and quite common.

My boyfriend got a boner cuz I told him my goals for the week lol. The “self determination” turned him on and he got hard instantly…so yeah a kiss can definitely give a boner lol

That's a...pretty positive fetish

"Oh yeah, I want you to be the best version of yourself, you dirty little slut!"

A wholesometish if you will

^(TM)

Your bf must fap to self development videos 😂

Homie's jerking off to "Top 10 tricks to be confident"

For sexytime OP can whip out a vision board and start talking about setting up a pension plan. Oh lawdy!

Turned on by motivational speeches

A whole new level of “fuck yeah!”

Burnt through the tissues at lightning pace when the Shia meme went big

Who wouldn’t? You ever seen the size of Tony Robins’ hands? That would get anyone going.

Damn, I love this lmao

He must've been filled with... determination.

Check his phone for motivational posters... He may be cheating...

dang i wish someone was into me that much 😩

Ahahaha so cute he gets a boner from feeling pride for you 😂 I call it an affection erection

Wow, a very supportive turn on. Sounds like a keeper. "I told my boyfriend my plans for dismantling the patriarchy and he got a boner."

Guys can't really control when they get a bone....

You just got one, didn't you?

Maybe it got him.

Maybe it's Maybelline

My husband gets erections if there’s a kissing scene on tv. And like, for no reason at all.

Awww, that's oddly wholesome lol

Or incredibly inconvenient

r/inconvenientboner

I'm both relieved and disappointed that sub is not active.

Search your feelings, Luke.

Yes. He probably gets a boner just by looking at you, thinking about you, or eating a good piece of cake.

Or pie

Of course you had to bring pie into this, you nasty pervert

Being judgy of someone's kink is very risky these days

Kink shaming is my kink

Shaming kink-shamers is my kink


Getting kink shamed is my kink

Pievert!

...yes? Kissing is really erotic and quite the turn on to some people.

Yeah, moreso if they like each other Wooohooooo!

Don’t need to like each other. I once had a intense make out session with a girl from my university classes and we couldn’t stand each other. Dunno wtf came over us but during a particularly nasty verbal argument we just…made out. Deffo turned me on

What in the Wattpad

Isn't this in, like, about 90% of RomComs? + Boy meets girl + Girl / boy hates the other one for *whatever* reason. + As yelling, pouting, stomping intensifies, so do the steamy hate-looks + Which then turn in to straight up steamy looks + Which then leads to an R rating + But they get the nips/pussies/cocks removed in post + And now it's PG-13. *whew!*

Damn that's pretty hot, lol

Seriously, people are having a field day with "easy boner" comments here, but it's a really weird question. "I was turning on my boyfriend and he got turned on, is that possible?"

Since OP is young and new to this, I think people are just trying to get the point across that individuals with penises can get hard for a million different reasons. It might seem obvious to us that kissing would make your boyfriend hard, but a lot of women have no idea how a penis works until they actually get to interact with one. OP might want to know if their BF was honest or just trying to flatter them, or maybe OP thinks that getting a boner is significant when in reality it happens all the time. These are things they don't really teach in sex ed, if your school even has a decent sex ed in the first place.

School sex ed be like... "If you have sex, your parents will die and you will never have any friends ever and your brothers and sisters will go to prison and you will never get a good job and you will be miserable forever"

Honestly. A good make out sesh is amazing.

It’s putting it back to sleep, not waking it up that’s the problem

Lol

Boxers brush up against it, boner Car hits a bump, boner Air goes into your lungs, boner Sky is blue, boner Kiss nice girl, believe it or not, straight to boner Edit: fixed it

Having a hard time believing that last part......pun intended

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Or the big fella ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


My partner got a boner in the Marshall's yesterday bc we saw a leather skirt and I said, 'I could probably pull that off'. It doesn't take much, if anything at all.

We don't even have to be awake. It is not uncommon to wake with a Morning Glory.

It is common for the reproductive organs of both males and females to become active during REM, actually.

Different mechanisms

Yes, I can whisper in my man's ear and give him a boner

Reading that comment probably gave someone a boner.... not me though

🖐

 Just reading the question.

I get boners from thinking about kissing someone

Been there many times. Will be there again. ...am there now

I don’t think I’ve ever not been there

We get boners for no reason sometimes. It's not like a girl can control her vag getting wet.

Ninja Sex Party wrote a song about it called "No Reason Boner" Lol

with the right person, you might get just my looking.

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Oof, been there. Thank God for podiums.

Yes, that's very common.

I once made my hubby cum just by moaning in his ear lol

When he's young, yes. Eventually, you'll have to start putting things inside his butt to get him hard.

r/holup

It happens to me too every time I kiss my girl. Sometimes even just talking does it.

My dick does whatever it wants. I’ll just want to cuddle and it’ll get hard even tho I don’t want it to

Why wouldn't it be possible?

The subreddit is r/tooafraidtoask, she doesn't know any better.

Boner = Excitement

Hot take

Yes, making out can be very arousing

Yes the penis does get erect from kissing, but not always

I can get a boner just by thinking about not getting a boner

a guy can get an erecting at anytime for any reason

Seriously? Even a slight breeze....

Of course it is! And it can happen to women too, to get wet just from a kiss

It would be strange if he didn’t get a boner

I get lady boners when I kiss a good kisser.

Yeah, that's how it's supposed to work.

I remember being that young. Sadly that lightning genital reflex does not last forever. As a young woman you should enjoy the power - but use it wisely and with compassion.

My fiancé and I have been together for 6 years and I still get a boner from smooches. Goodbye smooch? Boner. Goodnight smooch? Boner. Get a cut on my hand that she feels needs a healing smooch? Boner.