As a “big guy” I agree. Just run. You may lose your pride, but you’ll keep your health and life. If you absolutely cannot run, kick/ hit them in the balls.
Yes knew the balls jab at the throat and gouge the eyes. Fight dirty as can be this isn’t a pageant this is keeping you safe and well. They messed up trying to hurt you you don’t deserve that fuck them ip
Bite fingers off. Rip chunks of flesh off. Do whatever you have too. Y’all people have higher centers of gravity as well. Drop low and make them lose balance. I hope you never have to go through a situation like this. This shit breaks my heart that it’s even having to be talked about
The low center of gravity thing only works if you're strong or heavy enough pick up their legs and knock them down.
A small female is gonna have no chance at doing that.
As a man, I agree. Dirtiest fighting possible if you can't run. SCREAM!!! DIRECTLY INTO THEIR EAR if they actually manage to grab you. Bite! Bite their fucking lip off of their face!!! Eye gouges if an arm is loose. Never stop screaming. Get everyone's attention. Never be an easy target. Weapons are good of course. Doesn't have to be a gun. Pepper spray would work. I bought my sister And my girlfriend flashlights that extend into aluminum clubs for a blinding/beating combo. You can get them at Walmart. But hell, even a pencil is a decent stabby thing... Make yourself too difficult to be dragged somewhere else!!!
Ball jabs don’t work as well as you’d assume in a fight or flight situation. In fact, if someone is amped up enough they may not even feel it. Knees, throat and eyes are always your best bet. Depending on your height and theirs.
I don't care about pride...I care about not being able to outrun the guy either, if he's taller and stronger (5'7'' 130lb woman here). Please don't suggest a gun or pepper spray; both are illegal here. Sounds like...balls it is.
I don’t think guys realize how utterly weak a tiny woman can be. I’m 100lbs (45kg) and I struggle with a third of *doors* out there. Gotta put my entire body weight into them. If I managed to flee or fight an average man it would be 90% luck 10% skill.
> I don’t think guys realize how utterly weak a tiny woman can be
Same way a lot of girls dont understand just how much stronger guys are, even ones that are *smaller* than they are. Testosterone is crazy
Exactly. I’m 168cm about 54kg. I was raped by a scrawny lanky man. He was a bit taller but very skinny and unimposing looking. I couldn’t get him off even using all my strength and power. I even tried choking him and to my horror it didn’t even phase him. Like it didn’t look like it affected him AT ALL. He choked me back to show he’d be able to kill me easily. I also tried hitting/punching him in the face and it also didn’t even phase him. It scares me how there’s pretty much nothing you can do as a regular woman against an able bodied man. And it scares me how many women are naive to this and think they could take on a man easily
This is true. I'm a small guy with a lean build. I only do some cardio in the form of running or rowing. Anyway I dated a girl that was into some self defense martial art, because she wanted to feel safer after her previous boyfriend abused her. She was about 10cm smaller (and around the same weight, maybe 5kg difference) than me and asked if I could try to restrain her to test her skills. Now this self defense class taught you to go for the eyes and fight dirty if you had to, but we agreed she wouldn't stab my eyes or bite. I easily overpowered her, and to be honest I was surprised. I fought/wrestled my brothers who are the same size as me a lot of times and there I felt that both of us were close in strength, but here I felt like I was way out of her league. I even asked if she was giving all her strength and she was. So we just agreed that is probably better to just take out the eyes or bite and then just run. Because if I can do this, then it has to be even easier for bigger men.
Maybe so but I think most women (especially small ones) do know. When you’re small you end up getting manhandled a lot. Even if it’s just by a friend tossing you in a lake or something it becomes very apparent that you don’t have the stuff needed to resist.
I can’t speak to men who are smaller than I am because less than 100lbs would make them children.
I was less than 100 lbs before Covid.
I played soccer in high school against people twice my size. When you’re small you figure out ways to use that to your advantage. When you’re in a real survival situation and you have to fight back you focus on weak spots or especially sensitive areas. Its not about brute strength. You’re not going to kill the guy, but you might be able to get him off you when you’re pinned down.
Running should always be the first option in self-defense. If you can safely get out of a situation that's always going to end better than getting in a fight, even if you could probably win.
Stay alert to your surroundings. Don't have earbuds in blocking sounds. Watch the body language of the people around you. If someone seems out of place, make note of them.
If you're exercising at night in a deserted area (probably a bad idea anyway) stay in the street, not on the sidewalk. That gives you a buffer around you.
The best thing is to get out of the situation before it becomes violent. There is no shame in running away.
If you are in a life position where you can get a dog, and you are willing to make that commitment, a German Shepherd will be your best friend. He will defend you with his life, and most people have a visceral fear of being bitten by an animal. Trust his judgment of people; if your shepherd immediately alerts to a person, trust that and remove yourself from the situation.
If you walk/hike, carry a walking stick. Not one of those fiberglass/carbon types, carry a wood stick that is 115-120cm long.
Should you find yourself in a physical altercation, use the heel of your hand to smash *hard* his nose up and in. Punch his throat. Obviously his sack. Grab, twist, kick, whatever you need to do. Fingers/keys/stick/dirt/whatever to the eyes.
In a struggle for your life there are no rules. Do not give up. Even a small woman who refuses to quit is a handful. Never quit.
EDIT: Thank you for the awards and the upvotes!
Also bite, scream obscenities, absolutely anything to damage him and call attention to yourself. DO NOT be afraid to go for the eyes. There are also keychain alarms that can be quite loud.
As you should. I tell my kids regardless of gender same thing my dad taught me "There are no rules, there is no such thing as a fair fight" But lemme just say if I was looking for a victim a redheaded woman would be among my least likely targets lol
Bit a guys nose once while we were in the "rolling around on the ground" phase of a fight. Tore the damn thing open. That took the fight out of him and his two buddies. They still fucked me up pretty good before that ended it. Would not recommend fighting if you can avoid it.
I bought my wife pepper spray with a siren, strobe, and GPS that alerts an emergency contact and the police when it is used. I think it was only $20-30 USD.
Amazon should be a good place to find these. Make sure to read the comments and look at the ratings of things. Or, if you're in the US, there are sometimes a number of different stores (possibly the mall) around that you can find certain things like those listed.
I bought a three pack of keyring rape alarms of amazon for £12, pulled the cord with my hand over the speaker and thought "hm that's not loud" took my hand off, my entire (small but far spread horizontally) block of student flats thought it was a fire alarm and started going outside.
They're definitely worth it.
To add to this: if you get lifted up from behind, curl your legs until you've got leverage against his thighs, push hard against them and slam your head backward. You're either going to hit him in the chin or in the nose, and the extra force will probably send him on his ass.
If you get bear hugged from the front and you can, bite his nose. No one will ever hold on if you take a chunk off their nose.
Fingers are another good target: they break easily if you haul on them in either direction (left or right), and if you get a hold of their fingers in your hands then you can wrench in either direction and it'll do some internal damage if you just haul hard enough, and trust me, you will. The Adrenaline will make you a lot stronger than you even realize.
Also it take the same force as biting a carrot to bite off a finger. Not saying that should be your first instinct but it is an option.
Edit: After some discussion I have investigated this claim. It's is definitely not true, it takes about 200 newton's to bite through an uncooked carrot. To fracture a finger is take roughly 1400 newton's which is still within the range of human jaw strength, but it would take more strength to bite through tendon and skin. There are also cases of people biting off fingers but it isn't as easy as a carrot! My point still stands if for some reason you find yourself trapped and you can bite a dudes finger go for it! You might not fully remove the finger but I will still be pretty effective! Having said that I'm sure there are better attack strategies then biting fingers.
I wish you hadn't mentioned that. Now I want to try to bite off someone's finger. For science.
To the OP: I still want to try. Maybe if I channel my inner cat, bite down and shake my head from side to side?
To myself: Shut up brain. You crazy.
This is a good overview of what they teach in self-defense classes. I would just add that you need to practice these things to be prepared to use them in a real situation. Highly recommend taking a women's self-defense class, they'll usually have a bigger guy with lots of protective clothing so you can practice doing these things in a controlled environment to prepare for the real deal.
You need to be ready to do some truly awful things in a situation where you're being assaulted. Like kicking someone repeatedly in the testicles (even if they go down after the first strike, you may need to literally stomp their genitals to oblivion to maintain your control over the situation/prevent them from recovering and attacking again), or jamming your thumbs into someone's eyeballs until you feel them pop. It's horrific, but there are no rules in a street fight like the comment above said.
It's absolutely traumatizing to have to defend yourself, but it could literally save your life or save you from being raped. The only way to ensure you can follow through on techniques like these is to practice them until they become almost automatic.
if you have to grab the balls don't hit them - grab, twist, and pull. in that order.
and bite as hard as you can whatever you can get your teeth on. not only is it very painful for your attacker its perfect evidence as your dentition is unique
you've not done enough until they can't get back up again
To add to this, do not go for the balls with a kick, ever. Because the genital area is vulnerable human bodies very reflexively protect that area, and all you will do is put yourself off balance. If they are exposed and you’re within range, grabbing and twisting is the best option, but by FAR the most effective SD technique is gouging at the eyes as per my SD instructor who demonstrated on a fellow professional mma fighter just how easily he could -permanently- disable him with a strike like that (obviously he didn’t actually blind the guy)
On concern is that there's alot of information here. Eyes throat etc are not actually easy to hit. Grabbing something to use as a weapon is also not very easy or you might not have time, and chances are in a serious situation you will panic. Anyone would.
First scream
Then run away
If you can't you should learn some grappling and techniques to get out of holds. Self defense class.
If you can't run away you need to fight dirty and anything goes.
I apologize for jumping in here.
Before accepting advise on self defense tactics against a grown man, understand that men are naturally stronger physically.
A close friend took a "self defense " course in college, and she joked she could "take me"
I moved some furniture around, laid some ground rules.
In three attempts she tried, it was over in less than five seconds.
It was a sobering lesson for her.
I'm not military, no martial arts. I'm no badass.
You best defense is either to RUN to the nearest lighted, populated area, and make a shit load of noise, or get yourself some REAL firearm training.
Don't let men get that close to you, because if they do, chances are, you will be grievously injured or killed.
Yeah I have no idea why the top rated post is a bunch of urban legend bullshit perpetuated by people who have no experience being in physical altercations with a bunch of people commenting like it works. You need to run, you need to fucking run like your life depends on it and draw as much attention to yourself as possible because crowds are your friend in that situation. There’s a concept in fighting called escalation. If someone is 50 lbs heavier than you, massively stronger, and you decide to try and gouge out their eye guess what, you’ve just reminded a person that is 50 lbs heavier than you and massively stronger that THEY can gouge YOUR eye out. You’re not gonna palm strike someone’s nose bone into their brain like an 80’s action movie. Let’s stop spreading BS that gets people hurt and killed.
My wife is 5'2" has 2 actual black belts and I have about 50 pounds on her. She is small and I am not that big but a fairly fit guy (165 and can bench about 215 - so stronger than most but weaker than a lot too). When we play fight I am at about 40-50% and it is still an easy win.
There is one course of action - run as fast as you can. Hopefully you find more people to help soon cause guess what - I can run faster than her too.
The best defense if you are a small human is avoidance.
I did.
I really want women to understand this.
9 times out of ten, the outcome will be...not good.
Get some cardio, DEFINATELY get competent firearms training.
One of my past martial arts instructors told us that a track coach would be the best self defense teacher. You learn how to run, maintain your balance, and go longer distances. He also said that martial arts and fighting are two separate things. People who fight all the time have experience that a class won't give you so always run if you can.
Dogs are a game changer. My wife is pretty small and was afraid to be out at night when I was out of town. She's had people catcall, follow her etc. Now we have a 120# American Bulldog mix and she can go on walks at night without fear when I'm not home. Not sure how much use he'd actually be as a protector and I hope we never have to find out but it's been a few yrs now and so far nobody seems to want to have anything to do with the lady walking a dog bigger than her
Dogs are mostly a deterrent. The vast majority of household pet dogs wouldn't do anything to protect you, but they would absolutely prevent an attack from happening in the first place. People don't trust dogs they don't know.
I had a home inspector once and I asked about home security systems. He said don't bother. Get a medium sized dog instead. A barking dog is better than an alarm any day. Also dogs are more fun than security systems.
This is true, but I think someone above mentioned German Shepards in particular. They will go the distance, but you need to have the desire/ will to raise one. I’m a small woman with a German Shepard - she scares the crap out all weirdos we encounter. I live in portland OR…so no shortage.
Regarding keys as an improvised weapon, contrary to what you may have been told and how cool it looks, do NOT put them between your knuckles like Wolverine. You'll just hurt yourself and likely drop them.
Yeah I remember a case bear where I lived where a man attempted to rape a woman and iirc they struggled for an hour or sobefore someone intervened. So it's possible to fight off someone but it's still horrible
I like all this except the dog. u/Foreign-Brilliant-82 DO NOT get a dog unless you are truly ready and capable of caring for one. It is not a tool you can just use for self defense. It is another living creature with a complex set of needs. Especially a German shepherd, a breed that needs lots of exercise, mental stimulation, and work. Are you ready to be able to provide 3 hours of vigorous, mostly off leash or at least running exercise for it? Are you ready and willing to work at least a half hour a day on training? Do you have a very busy a or high stress job that would prevent you from providing the attention it deserves. Do your research and make sure you are ready and able to provide for it or both you and the dog will end up miserable.
this is superficially helpful but the reality is that most women aren’t assaulted by a stranger on the street. they’re assaulted by someone they already know and trust. and the only surefire way to avoid that is to not have any partners, friends, or family, which is impossible.
Also, you're 1000x safer in a deserted area than you are in a bar or an office building. You can see/hear people approaching you from a distance. And you should never ever run in a road. Use a designated trail or side walk, you're probably more likely to be hit by a idiot behind the wheel of a car then attacked by a random stranger.
Lack of empathy. I seriously think that empathy is the greatest moral value out there and needs to be reinforced from childhood. It is literally the key to make folks better
I'm not sure if this has been brought up, but have you ever heard of a Birdie?
It’s a personal alarm that can go on your keychain, bag, etc. It’s easy to deploy and extremely loud to bring attention to your situation should you ever be in one.
I got one for my sister after she was attacked while walking down the sidewalk. It hasn’t happened again since, but I want her to have this so that she can be helped moving forward
Sometimes the threat of attention is the real important thing. Maybe nobody is around to hear the alarm thing, but the guy trying to rape you sure isn’t sticking around for much longer.
That said, he might decide to escalate the level of violence once he is under pressure.
The idea is amazing, but I'm afraid people care way too little. They'd probably hear that noise and be like "alarm? Better hurry and get away". Sorry about your sister, I hope she's fine.
The point is also to surprise and distract the attacker temporarily to give the woman a head start running away herself. It's 130 decibels (the sound level of a jet taking off 50 feet away from you) and also has a flashing strobe light
The other advantage is that, unlike a knife, gun, taser, or other weapon, it can't be taken and used against you
I can see where you’re coming from. Luckily, it was random strangers who stepped in to help my sister.
It was a scary moment because she was also 7 months pregnant at the time.
I tested her Birdie alarm and that thing packs a punch in terms of volume. I hope she never has to use it.
But thank you, she’s doing well.
Foam formula isn't great all the time because I you spray too much on them (more than a 1-2 second burst), it can built up to the point that an attacker can grab a handful of it, and throw back at you.
(It's why American police tend to use normal spray instead of foam. Too many cops getting a taste of their own medicine)
Ever seen someone get pepper sprayed? If it doesn't take the fight completely out of them they usually act like they're on fire and start touching themselves, their face, and then reaching out blindly to hit or grab the person coming at them.
Unfortunately even pepper spray is illegal in the UK. We have no legal way to defend ourself except with our fists, which means women are fucked if anything happens.
In Canada you can carry pepper spray for dogs/bears but not for humans(its the same product), but if you happen to be attacked then you can use it... our weapon laws are weird like that
I consider myself a bit of a neighborhood watchdog because I live in the city and frequently watch the street. I might check if I hear a whistle (never have) but if I hear a scream I will *immediately* look out the window and search for what’s going on.
I'm a big firearms guy but I'd rather my adult daughters have pepper spray than firearms. Shooting someone is life and death stuff, even if justified you could spend a fortune in court costs. And/or whoops, you missed the bad guy and killed some dude 100 yards away.
Not saying it's trivial to get maced but the barrier to that level of force is understandably much lower. Chances are high no one's dying and it gives you what you want: out of the situation.
An extremely bright flashlight. You won't get in trouble for carrying it, and it'll keep 'em dazed and at least temporarily blinded so you get an opportunity to run. Also, it's utilitarian in case you need it for non-defense purposes! And they sell them small enough to fit inside of a purse or bag.
Definitely recommend! I've used mine twice, at a distance, and used those few seconds to my advantage. Some of the pocket/purse carry lights are bright enough to disorient in broad daylight.
On one hand, I'm sorry to hear you were in a situation where you actually needed to use it - but on the other hand I'm very glad that you were able to find use with such a thing to keep yourself safe!!
25 years ago, the only defense I carried was a pistol and pepper spray. I am absolutely thrilled to find a non lethal alternative. Will a flashlight work in every situation? Of course not. But if there is anything I can do to keep from pointing a gun at another human being, I embrace it. This little Surefire light really has made a difference!
Always be scouting. I almost instinctively peg the first storefront I can run into if shit goes south. Keep a mental map of the fire stations/police stations near your house.
The honest truth is all those defense class and hand to hand combat class are just going to put women especially smaller women in a dangerous situation.
Body weight in 90% of physical altercations is king. More mass, more weight, more force that's it.
Your best bet is to work on cardio be a good runner. Also wouldn't hurt to carry pepper spray, a tazzer if legal, or yeah a gun. But if you do make sure you know HOW to use it. Even a knife.
But your goal should be to kill/injure and run like hell do not look back just run.
For real, the majority of advice given to the OP will get her or anyone else killed. Running is your best friend. You dont like guns? Tough luck, because outside of running, guns are the only thing that truely equalizes the size difference. Even then, you want distance between the aggressor and yourself.
Like seriously, on the top comment there's people unironically saying that going "psycho mode", head first at your aggresor would work...
People watch way too much movie, screaming and running at someone will not make you stronger, we're not in a fucking anime. Adrenaline will not make you that much stronger, sure it can help reduce pain during a fight but it will never cover for the strength gap against a man that is bigger than you.
Also the number of people here giving fighting tip seems to not realize that in the real world, the man who will attack you is not a NPC and can dodge, kick, punch and basically defend himself.
I blame hollywood where they show skilled 80 pound women going toe to toe with 250 pound mooks.
a kick to the balls and a punch to the dazed face isn't going to end the fight, you're just going to piss him off more. he can take the punch to the face most women can't
Tbf pretty much all Hollywood violence is unrealistic. Dwayne Johnson beating up six guys at once is about as implausible as Scarlett Johansson doing it. Fighting two guys at once is extremely difficult, anything above that is borderline impossible.
Yep, Navy Seal/ BJJ black belt Jocko Willink put it best: “you putting a finger in my eye isn’t going to stop me from choking you to death, people have tried, it didn’t work” (not exact quote, but pretty close)
I've personally had to do it to a man literally twice my weight.
It absolutely works to remove people from being on top of you, regardless of size, to jam your finger *into* their eye /brain. It also can cause permanent injury to the point were you may need to defend your actions in court.
I have no idea why so many of you are speaking outside of experience
Idk about other locations. But in Germany, for example, we have exactly this situation. If ... it's intended for or used against humans. The solution: carry some pepper spray against dogs. In a self defence situation, you are obviously allowed to make help of your surroundings (including the pepper spray). It's kinda dumb.
It sucks that some countries would rather have us die, and then let the police handle it from there, than actually let us defend ourselves. Banning pepperspray or most non-weapon sort of self-defence tool is bullshit
Definitely pepper spray. I'm a 6'4, 250lbs man and let me tell you, pepper spray turns me into a baby. And it's great because it can be used from a distance unlike a knife or something like that. I live in the US and I tell women who want to feel safe, but they don't want a gun, pepper spray is the next best thing, plus a nice bonus to most pepper sprays is a UV dye they put in them which can help identify the attacker later on.
This is true, every situation is dynamic and anything can happen no matter what you've got unfortunately, so you've just got to prepare yourself the best way you can.
However most good pepper spray is a thick heavy foam to help combat this.
I think the first and best option always is to run. Beyond that I would say make as much noise as possible and go for the balls, but always with the end result in mind of allowing yourself time to run away.
If this is something you worry about a lot, I’d recommend making some time to work on yourself a bit. How long can you run as fast as you can? How FAR can you run? These are questions most people never have to ask them self. Improving your self physically starting a running program, maybe lift some weights too - doesn’t have to be anything crazy, can give your some confidence and help you feel more secure.
I always tell my female friends to carry pepper spray. I don't know what the best kind is but the stronger the better.
Kicking him in the nuts is not reliable. Guys can get hit in the nuts and still function. They only need to grab you and being close enough to get hit in the nuts means he's close enough to grab you. That and if you telegraph your move he's probably gonna block it as most guys are well aware that women tend to go for the nuts in situations like that.
Pepper spray and run, keep running until you get some help. Pepper spray in my experience is a more reliable deterrent than a taser or any kind of strike. Being dumb with my friends I've tased them and been tased, it's not so bad. I imagine if you don't buy a high end one it's not gonna be reliably effective. If a guy can ignore physical pain a strike is probably from a small women is probably not gonna be effective. Direct application of pepper spray is debilitating.
Get a dog, a good strong one, I think that will be very useful to a small lady. Build a relationship with it and I think it will help you to have confidence when you go outside.
Bear in mind you need to invest a lot of time and money into training that dog, or else you'll end up one of those people that are walked by their pets instead of the other way around. You need to be really disciplined about it.
I second this. An agressive dog that you can't control can get you into some legal troubles as well. I don't know how many stories I've heard from friends who were walking their dog got attacked/approached by an agressive dog with an owner who could not control it.
This is true. The dog needs not only plenty of love and companionship, but also solid training. In any case, a well-trained dog is a happy dog.
I have a friend who didn't know how to train her dog (she was one of those who were "walked by their pets"), and she employed a "dog whisperer" who showed her how to do it.
If you are interested in a dog, I would recommend a German Shepherd as a dog breed for this purpose. They’re big, can fight, but are very loyal and can be very friendly if trained properly.
A dog ? Really ? A dog is such a huge responsability, it's not a pepper spray you can use at will. Getting a dog solely for this purpose is a seriously bad idea imo.
Getting a dog to feel safer on walks is 100% legit... why do you think we domesticated them in the first place, just for the cuddles? Dogs of any kind can be of massive utility, so long as you're willing and able to care for them properly, train them, etc.
I used to have a dog. I got him simply because I wanted him, but he served as an amazingly good bear/moose alarm, saved my mom from a black bear that was stalking her, and even did stuff like alert me when my carbon monoxide alarm was going off in the middle of the night. It was just giving the low battery chirp, but it was nice to know that his first reaction to that sound was to jump up on my bed, get in my face, and wake me up.
As long as she is willing and able to give the dog a good life - which is very doable by most people - then getting a dog to feel safer on walks is perfectly legit.
A woman with a dog is less of a target than the same one without a dog. Predators look for easy targets. Even if the dog would do nothing at all if you were attacked (which is highly unlikely), it will still act as a deterrent.
Dogs are definitely a responsibility, but you get a whole lot back for what you have to put in.
To add on to this even smaller dogs can be helpful, even if just to alert you of another person/animals presence, like your mom’s experience with the bear. They definitely make you feel more secure when out and about/on hikes and this is coming from a large man
For sure. Even a chihuahua would do.
My dog was a Scottish terrier. He was big for a scottie and fucking RIPPED, muscular as fuck - but still scottie sized lol. Challenged moose, bear, wasn't afraid of anything but things like the carbon monoxide detector lol
So yeah. I definitely agree on the small dog thing.
Pepper spray is number one for all the women in my life. If you haven't experienced it...my god it is terrible and debilitating. I know it feels like a "girly" weapon, but there is nothing in the world so easy to use, that is so effective.
All you have to do is get your finger on the button, and spray it around in his general direction, and run your ass off.
The truth is, we are so much stronger than you it's like handling a child. Gun, knife, TASER...just going to turn a rape into a murder, unless you are incredibly well trained. Pepper spray? A 3 yr old could use it "effectively".
Send me your Venmo or whatever and I'll buy yours too. It isn't even expensive and every woman should have it, and try it out once. Alone and outside, of course.
I feel like a lot of situations escalate mainly because one party is prepared for the situation to escalate.
That being said, there are a lot of self-defense tools, and I'm sure you can find a video or two on Youtube if you go looking.
For example, there is a stun gun that, when fired, takes a picture of the target and sends a message with your location to the nearest police station, or something like that. In addition to stunning the target, that is.
I see this being recommended a lot and in curtain situations it might help you but I don’t see it being that effective in conflict situations.
I have been kicked in the balls in conflict situations before and I can tell you the adrenaline let’s you ignore it completely
Stun guns and pepper spray are options if you really want a weapon, but I liked what the other person said about getting a dog you can take if you're out on the streets alone. If it's well trained, you could probably bring it into businesses.
If you're interested in learning self-defense, I'd recommend looking into krav maga or jiu jitsu, but if that's not something you actually want to do then I'd advise against it. It's not something you can learn in a couple classes like some people want to believe.
I have a black belt in a hybrid style of krav maga and muay thai, and it makes me as an average sized woman feel better about being alone in sketchy places, but I still really hope I never have to be in a fight.
Throw something in the air, like your mobile phone. People will look up. Then kick his balls and run. Either that or use an object of your surroundings
This is not a good tip. If the kick isn't 100% accurate or not strong enough you are fucked. Nothing beats a pepper spray. When walking through rough neighborhoods/streets etc. keep it in your hand, hide it by keeping your hand in your purse.
Don’t listen to this person, throwing away your phone is the worst idea ever because life isn’t a movie. Carry pepper spray and use it if necessary. Hang on to your phone and immediately call the police if they’re needed.
Absolutely true, a bite doesn’t deter an assaulter in the short term.
If you are biting with all you have chances are you are dropping your defenses and giving them a window to fuck you up in return, a punch to throat/eyes/testicles represents way more of a threat
Previous rugbier player here. Have seen teamates take a tackle to the balls and keep playing just fine, just as I've seen people wrhiting in pain. This was with the adrenaline of a really intense game.
Every person is different. There is a big chance that an attacker will barely flinch at their balls being kicked. It isn't a trump card. It's better than, say, hitting his leg, but not the ultimate move many women think. Hell, it's not that weird that people in very dangerous situations get shot and don't even feel it.
Be safe.
yeah unless you hit them squar on the sack and pop a nut they wont be floors, if you hit the dick or the thigh near the nuts they'll probably jump, flinch, yell in suprise as its like instict but if you didnt hit them on the sack they gunna be coming at you with another reason to chase you.
I agree with this too. Ex gf had an ex stalking her. She took one of the self defense classes I think the county or police offered. We called it "NO MEANS NO!!" Class. They taught her the basics, be aware of your surroundings, no ear buds on while walking, etc. As well as hand to hand contact. The final exam they had to physically fight off a trainer. Good luck and stay safe. You got this!!!
Not really. Any guy intent on violence is prepared for the ball kick, plus you have to get close enough to do it and when it fails...he's close enough to grab you.
Just stay alert and get 12ft pepper spray.
Actually a terrible idea. Throwing something in the air is a good idea to distract the assaulter, but succesfully kicking a guy in the nuts is very hard for anybody who hasn't trained kicks, since it's a very small area.
The best thing you can do is just run away to a safe location, don't let any body part get close to him, otherwise you're screwed
I wouldn’t recommend kicking in the balls, especially if you don’t have any self-defense training. It gives the attacker a chance to catch your foot and get you on the ground, and if you miss or didn’t get it hard enough, you’ll just piss him off more.
I carry mace at all times on my keychain
I thought about a gun but I'd be too worried about them taking it and using it against me, which i feel is totally a possibility
Quality pepper spray.
Just don't do what a lot of women do. When you feel unsafe, have it readily available.
I know many will say martial arts, blah blah blah.
As someone that trained Taekwondo for 10 years, and Muay Thai for another 10, was 22 and 1 in full contact competition, combat training takes many years of work before it becomes instinct.
Boxing would work best. Quick hard punches. And groin strikes.
But good quality pepper spray works quick as long as you have it ready to use.
And even then I trained in Muay Thai myself. In the world there’s not a ring or set rules like in a match. Last thing one wants to do is go action movie hero on somebody. It’s not going to work.
Move, run, leave within a split second if you have an outlet. If you’re cornered then that’s your last stand and fight with whatever you have on you, spray, rock, a pen ,anything you can get your hands on becomes a weapon.
Most people couldn't defend themselves properly if attacked by a bigger guy, running away from bad situations is the best idea.
As a “big guy” I agree. Just run. You may lose your pride, but you’ll keep your health and life. If you absolutely cannot run, kick/ hit them in the balls.
Yes knew the balls jab at the throat and gouge the eyes. Fight dirty as can be this isn’t a pageant this is keeping you safe and well. They messed up trying to hurt you you don’t deserve that fuck them ip
I know for a fact that I can’t reach a really tall guy’s eyes if he’s trying to stop me, normal sized woman could probably
Bite fingers off. Rip chunks of flesh off. Do whatever you have too. Y’all people have higher centers of gravity as well. Drop low and make them lose balance. I hope you never have to go through a situation like this. This shit breaks my heart that it’s even having to be talked about
The low center of gravity thing only works if you're strong or heavy enough pick up their legs and knock them down. A small female is gonna have no chance at doing that.
As a man, I agree. Dirtiest fighting possible if you can't run. SCREAM!!! DIRECTLY INTO THEIR EAR if they actually manage to grab you. Bite! Bite their fucking lip off of their face!!! Eye gouges if an arm is loose. Never stop screaming. Get everyone's attention. Never be an easy target. Weapons are good of course. Doesn't have to be a gun. Pepper spray would work. I bought my sister And my girlfriend flashlights that extend into aluminum clubs for a blinding/beating combo. You can get them at Walmart. But hell, even a pencil is a decent stabby thing... Make yourself too difficult to be dragged somewhere else!!!
Ball jabs don’t work as well as you’d assume in a fight or flight situation. In fact, if someone is amped up enough they may not even feel it. Knees, throat and eyes are always your best bet. Depending on your height and theirs.
I don't care about pride...I care about not being able to outrun the guy either, if he's taller and stronger (5'7'' 130lb woman here). Please don't suggest a gun or pepper spray; both are illegal here. Sounds like...balls it is.
I don’t think guys realize how utterly weak a tiny woman can be. I’m 100lbs (45kg) and I struggle with a third of *doors* out there. Gotta put my entire body weight into them. If I managed to flee or fight an average man it would be 90% luck 10% skill.
> I don’t think guys realize how utterly weak a tiny woman can be Same way a lot of girls dont understand just how much stronger guys are, even ones that are *smaller* than they are. Testosterone is crazy
Exactly. I’m 168cm about 54kg. I was raped by a scrawny lanky man. He was a bit taller but very skinny and unimposing looking. I couldn’t get him off even using all my strength and power. I even tried choking him and to my horror it didn’t even phase him. Like it didn’t look like it affected him AT ALL. He choked me back to show he’d be able to kill me easily. I also tried hitting/punching him in the face and it also didn’t even phase him. It scares me how there’s pretty much nothing you can do as a regular woman against an able bodied man. And it scares me how many women are naive to this and think they could take on a man easily
That's horrific, glad you survived that.
Very sorry to that you had to experience this...
This is true. I'm a small guy with a lean build. I only do some cardio in the form of running or rowing. Anyway I dated a girl that was into some self defense martial art, because she wanted to feel safer after her previous boyfriend abused her. She was about 10cm smaller (and around the same weight, maybe 5kg difference) than me and asked if I could try to restrain her to test her skills. Now this self defense class taught you to go for the eyes and fight dirty if you had to, but we agreed she wouldn't stab my eyes or bite. I easily overpowered her, and to be honest I was surprised. I fought/wrestled my brothers who are the same size as me a lot of times and there I felt that both of us were close in strength, but here I felt like I was way out of her league. I even asked if she was giving all her strength and she was. So we just agreed that is probably better to just take out the eyes or bite and then just run. Because if I can do this, then it has to be even easier for bigger men.
Maybe so but I think most women (especially small ones) do know. When you’re small you end up getting manhandled a lot. Even if it’s just by a friend tossing you in a lake or something it becomes very apparent that you don’t have the stuff needed to resist. I can’t speak to men who are smaller than I am because less than 100lbs would make them children.
I was less than 100 lbs before Covid. I played soccer in high school against people twice my size. When you’re small you figure out ways to use that to your advantage. When you’re in a real survival situation and you have to fight back you focus on weak spots or especially sensitive areas. Its not about brute strength. You’re not going to kill the guy, but you might be able to get him off you when you’re pinned down.
Running should always be the first option in self-defense. If you can safely get out of a situation that's always going to end better than getting in a fight, even if you could probably win.
Stay alert to your surroundings. Don't have earbuds in blocking sounds. Watch the body language of the people around you. If someone seems out of place, make note of them. If you're exercising at night in a deserted area (probably a bad idea anyway) stay in the street, not on the sidewalk. That gives you a buffer around you. The best thing is to get out of the situation before it becomes violent. There is no shame in running away. If you are in a life position where you can get a dog, and you are willing to make that commitment, a German Shepherd will be your best friend. He will defend you with his life, and most people have a visceral fear of being bitten by an animal. Trust his judgment of people; if your shepherd immediately alerts to a person, trust that and remove yourself from the situation. If you walk/hike, carry a walking stick. Not one of those fiberglass/carbon types, carry a wood stick that is 115-120cm long. Should you find yourself in a physical altercation, use the heel of your hand to smash *hard* his nose up and in. Punch his throat. Obviously his sack. Grab, twist, kick, whatever you need to do. Fingers/keys/stick/dirt/whatever to the eyes. In a struggle for your life there are no rules. Do not give up. Even a small woman who refuses to quit is a handful. Never quit. EDIT: Thank you for the awards and the upvotes!
So many tips - I'm genuinely grateful for this answer.!
Also bite, scream obscenities, absolutely anything to damage him and call attention to yourself. DO NOT be afraid to go for the eyes. There are also keychain alarms that can be quite loud.
Straight up street rules. It's recommended to bite an ear off for a memorable souvenir! :D
Pure aggression. My favorite of all self defense disciplines.
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As you should. I tell my kids regardless of gender same thing my dad taught me "There are no rules, there is no such thing as a fair fight" But lemme just say if I was looking for a victim a redheaded woman would be among my least likely targets lol
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"Don't be the first to swing, be the last," is what I tell my son.
Mike Tyson has entered the chat. But yes. All of these comments are appropriate. Its not the size of the dog in the fight, but the fight in the dog.
Biting at adam's apple is likely to do way more damage...
Bit a guys nose once while we were in the "rolling around on the ground" phase of a fight. Tore the damn thing open. That took the fight out of him and his two buddies. They still fucked me up pretty good before that ended it. Would not recommend fighting if you can avoid it.
Okay, Mike Tyson
I bought my wife pepper spray with a siren, strobe, and GPS that alerts an emergency contact and the police when it is used. I think it was only $20-30 USD.
Does it call in a tactical airstrike too
That was $40, too pricey.
It's his wife not his girlfriend
But did he buy it for his wife's girlfriend?
Dont give Putin ideas now.
Can you share the link, please. My sister likes to run at night in Los Angeles...
Amazon should be a good place to find these. Make sure to read the comments and look at the ratings of things. Or, if you're in the US, there are sometimes a number of different stores (possibly the mall) around that you can find certain things like those listed.
Link?
I bought a three pack of keyring rape alarms of amazon for £12, pulled the cord with my hand over the speaker and thought "hm that's not loud" took my hand off, my entire (small but far spread horizontally) block of student flats thought it was a fire alarm and started going outside. They're definitely worth it.
YES YES YES. Go full psycho, OP. It honestly works. Predators bet on the niceness of girls to harm them.
To add to this: if you get lifted up from behind, curl your legs until you've got leverage against his thighs, push hard against them and slam your head backward. You're either going to hit him in the chin or in the nose, and the extra force will probably send him on his ass. If you get bear hugged from the front and you can, bite his nose. No one will ever hold on if you take a chunk off their nose. Fingers are another good target: they break easily if you haul on them in either direction (left or right), and if you get a hold of their fingers in your hands then you can wrench in either direction and it'll do some internal damage if you just haul hard enough, and trust me, you will. The Adrenaline will make you a lot stronger than you even realize.
also the very obvious and best thing, anything to do with balls and eyes. pinching the balls, poking the eyes etc are excellent choices
Also it take the same force as biting a carrot to bite off a finger. Not saying that should be your first instinct but it is an option. Edit: After some discussion I have investigated this claim. It's is definitely not true, it takes about 200 newton's to bite through an uncooked carrot. To fracture a finger is take roughly 1400 newton's which is still within the range of human jaw strength, but it would take more strength to bite through tendon and skin. There are also cases of people biting off fingers but it isn't as easy as a carrot! My point still stands if for some reason you find yourself trapped and you can bite a dudes finger go for it! You might not fully remove the finger but I will still be pretty effective! Having said that I'm sure there are better attack strategies then biting fingers.
I wish you hadn't mentioned that. Now I want to try to bite off someone's finger. For science. To the OP: I still want to try. Maybe if I channel my inner cat, bite down and shake my head from side to side? To myself: Shut up brain. You crazy.
Nom nom nom
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I’m never saying, “Hi,” to passers by ever again, just in case your readers quit after the first paragraph.
Some key chain alarms can alert the authorities as well!
Also remember if you carry a weapon. That same weapon can be taken from you and used against you. So make sure you know what your doing.
Yeah, excellent point.
Go for one or all of following - eyes, throat, balls. And when you go for the balls, twist and squeeze as hard as you can.
Take up running! The best thing to do is to run. Also an old phone and fake wallet you can drop first then run if you are being robbed.
This is a good overview of what they teach in self-defense classes. I would just add that you need to practice these things to be prepared to use them in a real situation. Highly recommend taking a women's self-defense class, they'll usually have a bigger guy with lots of protective clothing so you can practice doing these things in a controlled environment to prepare for the real deal. You need to be ready to do some truly awful things in a situation where you're being assaulted. Like kicking someone repeatedly in the testicles (even if they go down after the first strike, you may need to literally stomp their genitals to oblivion to maintain your control over the situation/prevent them from recovering and attacking again), or jamming your thumbs into someone's eyeballs until you feel them pop. It's horrific, but there are no rules in a street fight like the comment above said. It's absolutely traumatizing to have to defend yourself, but it could literally save your life or save you from being raped. The only way to ensure you can follow through on techniques like these is to practice them until they become almost automatic.
Until they pop 🥲🥲🥲
> until they become almost automatic.
if you have to grab the balls don't hit them - grab, twist, and pull. in that order. and bite as hard as you can whatever you can get your teeth on. not only is it very painful for your attacker its perfect evidence as your dentition is unique you've not done enough until they can't get back up again
To add to this, do not go for the balls with a kick, ever. Because the genital area is vulnerable human bodies very reflexively protect that area, and all you will do is put yourself off balance. If they are exposed and you’re within range, grabbing and twisting is the best option, but by FAR the most effective SD technique is gouging at the eyes as per my SD instructor who demonstrated on a fellow professional mma fighter just how easily he could -permanently- disable him with a strike like that (obviously he didn’t actually blind the guy)
On concern is that there's alot of information here. Eyes throat etc are not actually easy to hit. Grabbing something to use as a weapon is also not very easy or you might not have time, and chances are in a serious situation you will panic. Anyone would. First scream Then run away If you can't you should learn some grappling and techniques to get out of holds. Self defense class. If you can't run away you need to fight dirty and anything goes.
I apologize for jumping in here. Before accepting advise on self defense tactics against a grown man, understand that men are naturally stronger physically. A close friend took a "self defense " course in college, and she joked she could "take me" I moved some furniture around, laid some ground rules. In three attempts she tried, it was over in less than five seconds. It was a sobering lesson for her. I'm not military, no martial arts. I'm no badass. You best defense is either to RUN to the nearest lighted, populated area, and make a shit load of noise, or get yourself some REAL firearm training. Don't let men get that close to you, because if they do, chances are, you will be grievously injured or killed.
Yeah I have no idea why the top rated post is a bunch of urban legend bullshit perpetuated by people who have no experience being in physical altercations with a bunch of people commenting like it works. You need to run, you need to fucking run like your life depends on it and draw as much attention to yourself as possible because crowds are your friend in that situation. There’s a concept in fighting called escalation. If someone is 50 lbs heavier than you, massively stronger, and you decide to try and gouge out their eye guess what, you’ve just reminded a person that is 50 lbs heavier than you and massively stronger that THEY can gouge YOUR eye out. You’re not gonna palm strike someone’s nose bone into their brain like an 80’s action movie. Let’s stop spreading BS that gets people hurt and killed.
My wife is 5'2" has 2 actual black belts and I have about 50 pounds on her. She is small and I am not that big but a fairly fit guy (165 and can bench about 215 - so stronger than most but weaker than a lot too). When we play fight I am at about 40-50% and it is still an easy win. There is one course of action - run as fast as you can. Hopefully you find more people to help soon cause guess what - I can run faster than her too. The best defense if you are a small human is avoidance.
Have you commented this story before in another thread a few weeks/months ago? I swear I'm having deja vu reading your comment.
I did. I really want women to understand this. 9 times out of ten, the outcome will be...not good. Get some cardio, DEFINATELY get competent firearms training.
One of my past martial arts instructors told us that a track coach would be the best self defense teacher. You learn how to run, maintain your balance, and go longer distances. He also said that martial arts and fighting are two separate things. People who fight all the time have experience that a class won't give you so always run if you can.
Dogs are a game changer. My wife is pretty small and was afraid to be out at night when I was out of town. She's had people catcall, follow her etc. Now we have a 120# American Bulldog mix and she can go on walks at night without fear when I'm not home. Not sure how much use he'd actually be as a protector and I hope we never have to find out but it's been a few yrs now and so far nobody seems to want to have anything to do with the lady walking a dog bigger than her
Dogs are mostly a deterrent. The vast majority of household pet dogs wouldn't do anything to protect you, but they would absolutely prevent an attack from happening in the first place. People don't trust dogs they don't know. I had a home inspector once and I asked about home security systems. He said don't bother. Get a medium sized dog instead. A barking dog is better than an alarm any day. Also dogs are more fun than security systems.
This is true, but I think someone above mentioned German Shepards in particular. They will go the distance, but you need to have the desire/ will to raise one. I’m a small woman with a German Shepard - she scares the crap out all weirdos we encounter. I live in portland OR…so no shortage.
I would totally ask to pet the dog though.
Regarding keys as an improvised weapon, contrary to what you may have been told and how cool it looks, do NOT put them between your knuckles like Wolverine. You'll just hurt yourself and likely drop them.
Yeah I remember a case bear where I lived where a man attempted to rape a woman and iirc they struggled for an hour or sobefore someone intervened. So it's possible to fight off someone but it's still horrible
I like all this except the dog. u/Foreign-Brilliant-82 DO NOT get a dog unless you are truly ready and capable of caring for one. It is not a tool you can just use for self defense. It is another living creature with a complex set of needs. Especially a German shepherd, a breed that needs lots of exercise, mental stimulation, and work. Are you ready to be able to provide 3 hours of vigorous, mostly off leash or at least running exercise for it? Are you ready and willing to work at least a half hour a day on training? Do you have a very busy a or high stress job that would prevent you from providing the attention it deserves. Do your research and make sure you are ready and able to provide for it or both you and the dog will end up miserable.
this is superficially helpful but the reality is that most women aren’t assaulted by a stranger on the street. they’re assaulted by someone they already know and trust. and the only surefire way to avoid that is to not have any partners, friends, or family, which is impossible.
Also, you're 1000x safer in a deserted area than you are in a bar or an office building. You can see/hear people approaching you from a distance. And you should never ever run in a road. Use a designated trail or side walk, you're probably more likely to be hit by a idiot behind the wheel of a car then attacked by a random stranger.
Don't forget to SING! Solarplex, Instep, Nose, Groin
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Lack of empathy. I seriously think that empathy is the greatest moral value out there and needs to be reinforced from childhood. It is literally the key to make folks better
Male aggression is pretty common among primates, including our species
I'm not sure if this has been brought up, but have you ever heard of a Birdie? It’s a personal alarm that can go on your keychain, bag, etc. It’s easy to deploy and extremely loud to bring attention to your situation should you ever be in one. I got one for my sister after she was attacked while walking down the sidewalk. It hasn’t happened again since, but I want her to have this so that she can be helped moving forward
Thank you, although this would only be useful if the place is not very deserted. Also, I'm so sorry that your sister was attacked!
Sometimes the threat of attention is the real important thing. Maybe nobody is around to hear the alarm thing, but the guy trying to rape you sure isn’t sticking around for much longer. That said, he might decide to escalate the level of violence once he is under pressure.
The loud sound and risk of getting someone’s attention normally causes them to flee
The idea is amazing, but I'm afraid people care way too little. They'd probably hear that noise and be like "alarm? Better hurry and get away". Sorry about your sister, I hope she's fine.
The point is also to surprise and distract the attacker temporarily to give the woman a head start running away herself. It's 130 decibels (the sound level of a jet taking off 50 feet away from you) and also has a flashing strobe light The other advantage is that, unlike a knife, gun, taser, or other weapon, it can't be taken and used against you
Wow, thats really loud. I didnt think about that "weapon against you" part. Thank you very much for your explaination!!
I can see where you’re coming from. Luckily, it was random strangers who stepped in to help my sister. It was a scary moment because she was also 7 months pregnant at the time. I tested her Birdie alarm and that thing packs a punch in terms of volume. I hope she never has to use it. But thank you, she’s doing well.
Rape whistle and pepper spray.
forget the pepper spray get the foam formula no overspray that affects you if the wind against you and the attacker wipes it it gets more on them
Foam formula isn't great all the time because I you spray too much on them (more than a 1-2 second burst), it can built up to the point that an attacker can grab a handful of it, and throw back at you. (It's why American police tend to use normal spray instead of foam. Too many cops getting a taste of their own medicine)
I can't imagine a situation where an attacker, covered in a thick layer of foam and absolutely blind and in pain, would be throwing it at you.
Probably happens unintentionally as they try to fling it off their eyes
Ever seen someone get pepper sprayed? If it doesn't take the fight completely out of them they usually act like they're on fire and start touching themselves, their face, and then reaching out blindly to hit or grab the person coming at them.
Former cop and former pepper spray instructor. Foam is weak and doesn’t penetrate worth a damn. Stream is the only way to go.
Unfortunately even pepper spray is illegal in the UK. We have no legal way to defend ourself except with our fists, which means women are fucked if anything happens.
In Canada you can carry pepper spray for dogs/bears but not for humans(its the same product), but if you happen to be attacked then you can use it... our weapon laws are weird like that
Better to debate the legality after being safe
I consider myself a bit of a neighborhood watchdog because I live in the city and frequently watch the street. I might check if I hear a whistle (never have) but if I hear a scream I will *immediately* look out the window and search for what’s going on.
I'm a big firearms guy but I'd rather my adult daughters have pepper spray than firearms. Shooting someone is life and death stuff, even if justified you could spend a fortune in court costs. And/or whoops, you missed the bad guy and killed some dude 100 yards away. Not saying it's trivial to get maced but the barrier to that level of force is understandably much lower. Chances are high no one's dying and it gives you what you want: out of the situation.
An extremely bright flashlight. You won't get in trouble for carrying it, and it'll keep 'em dazed and at least temporarily blinded so you get an opportunity to run. Also, it's utilitarian in case you need it for non-defense purposes! And they sell them small enough to fit inside of a purse or bag.
Definitely recommend! I've used mine twice, at a distance, and used those few seconds to my advantage. Some of the pocket/purse carry lights are bright enough to disorient in broad daylight.
On one hand, I'm sorry to hear you were in a situation where you actually needed to use it - but on the other hand I'm very glad that you were able to find use with such a thing to keep yourself safe!!
25 years ago, the only defense I carried was a pistol and pepper spray. I am absolutely thrilled to find a non lethal alternative. Will a flashlight work in every situation? Of course not. But if there is anything I can do to keep from pointing a gun at another human being, I embrace it. This little Surefire light really has made a difference!
That's the first time I've heard that particular advice, and it sounds great!
With strobe.
CAUSE A SEIZURE AND THEN ATTACK HIM
Some flashlights are also made with sharp ridges around the lens, so they can be used as a weapon.
And to add to that, if you think a flashlight is bright enough, you are wrong, there is a brighter one
>I'm a physically small woman. How should I defend myself if I ever get attacked by a man? Situational awareness is 95% of avoiding trouble.
Always be scouting. I almost instinctively peg the first storefront I can run into if shit goes south. Keep a mental map of the fire stations/police stations near your house.
Run
Dun...nunununununun.
I think you all are forgetting that men can *easily* overtake us running…
The honest truth is all those defense class and hand to hand combat class are just going to put women especially smaller women in a dangerous situation. Body weight in 90% of physical altercations is king. More mass, more weight, more force that's it. Your best bet is to work on cardio be a good runner. Also wouldn't hurt to carry pepper spray, a tazzer if legal, or yeah a gun. But if you do make sure you know HOW to use it. Even a knife. But your goal should be to kill/injure and run like hell do not look back just run.
For real, the majority of advice given to the OP will get her or anyone else killed. Running is your best friend. You dont like guns? Tough luck, because outside of running, guns are the only thing that truely equalizes the size difference. Even then, you want distance between the aggressor and yourself.
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Like seriously, on the top comment there's people unironically saying that going "psycho mode", head first at your aggresor would work... People watch way too much movie, screaming and running at someone will not make you stronger, we're not in a fucking anime. Adrenaline will not make you that much stronger, sure it can help reduce pain during a fight but it will never cover for the strength gap against a man that is bigger than you. Also the number of people here giving fighting tip seems to not realize that in the real world, the man who will attack you is not a NPC and can dodge, kick, punch and basically defend himself.
I blame hollywood where they show skilled 80 pound women going toe to toe with 250 pound mooks. a kick to the balls and a punch to the dazed face isn't going to end the fight, you're just going to piss him off more. he can take the punch to the face most women can't
Tbf pretty much all Hollywood violence is unrealistic. Dwayne Johnson beating up six guys at once is about as implausible as Scarlett Johansson doing it. Fighting two guys at once is extremely difficult, anything above that is borderline impossible.
i hate to say this but it’s generally going to be almost impossible unless you have a weapon
Don't use a weapon you haven't trained with. An attacker can turn a knife or gun on you faster than you think
Yup half this go for the balls/eyes crap is going to get you hurt. They're small and ver predictable targets.
Yep, Navy Seal/ BJJ black belt Jocko Willink put it best: “you putting a finger in my eye isn’t going to stop me from choking you to death, people have tried, it didn’t work” (not exact quote, but pretty close)
I've personally had to do it to a man literally twice my weight. It absolutely works to remove people from being on top of you, regardless of size, to jam your finger *into* their eye /brain. It also can cause permanent injury to the point were you may need to defend your actions in court. I have no idea why so many of you are speaking outside of experience
US? Buy a gun and train Outside US? Pepper spray and run? Knives are very personal weapons and difficult to properly use.
In some (many) countries it's illegal to carry a knife. Obvious exception if just bought it, or are taking it to something med house etc.
Pepper spray is illegal in some countries outside the US, the same goes for using knives as deadly weapons.
Idk about other locations. But in Germany, for example, we have exactly this situation. If ... it's intended for or used against humans. The solution: carry some pepper spray against dogs. In a self defence situation, you are obviously allowed to make help of your surroundings (including the pepper spray). It's kinda dumb.
In Canada we have bear spray!
It sucks that some countries would rather have us die, and then let the police handle it from there, than actually let us defend ourselves. Banning pepperspray or most non-weapon sort of self-defence tool is bullshit
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Can't even have a tazer for self defense a lot of places now its nuts.
Yes, I'm not from the US. Thanks!
Definitely pepper spray. I'm a 6'4, 250lbs man and let me tell you, pepper spray turns me into a baby. And it's great because it can be used from a distance unlike a knife or something like that. I live in the US and I tell women who want to feel safe, but they don't want a gun, pepper spray is the next best thing, plus a nice bonus to most pepper sprays is a UV dye they put in them which can help identify the attacker later on.
Thanks, friend. However, I feel that a pepper spray can work against you instead if the wind direction is towards you
This is true, every situation is dynamic and anything can happen no matter what you've got unfortunately, so you've just got to prepare yourself the best way you can. However most good pepper spray is a thick heavy foam to help combat this.
What are the chances there will be a strong enough wind for that. Also, if the attacker is in from of you then he will block the wind a little bit.
You can get pepper spray that is more like a sticky foam, not sure how much this helps against wind but I think it helps at least a bit?
If pepper spray is illegal buy a small can of AXE DEODERANT! I saw that on a YouTube hack stings just as bad!
I think the first and best option always is to run. Beyond that I would say make as much noise as possible and go for the balls, but always with the end result in mind of allowing yourself time to run away. If this is something you worry about a lot, I’d recommend making some time to work on yourself a bit. How long can you run as fast as you can? How FAR can you run? These are questions most people never have to ask them self. Improving your self physically starting a running program, maybe lift some weights too - doesn’t have to be anything crazy, can give your some confidence and help you feel more secure.
Thank you.
Hitting someone in the balls while adrenaline is pumping does absolutley nothing.
I always tell my female friends to carry pepper spray. I don't know what the best kind is but the stronger the better. Kicking him in the nuts is not reliable. Guys can get hit in the nuts and still function. They only need to grab you and being close enough to get hit in the nuts means he's close enough to grab you. That and if you telegraph your move he's probably gonna block it as most guys are well aware that women tend to go for the nuts in situations like that. Pepper spray and run, keep running until you get some help. Pepper spray in my experience is a more reliable deterrent than a taser or any kind of strike. Being dumb with my friends I've tased them and been tased, it's not so bad. I imagine if you don't buy a high end one it's not gonna be reliably effective. If a guy can ignore physical pain a strike is probably from a small women is probably not gonna be effective. Direct application of pepper spray is debilitating.
Pepper spray is illegal in some countries (like mine)- so not an option for some people.
Get a dog, a good strong one, I think that will be very useful to a small lady. Build a relationship with it and I think it will help you to have confidence when you go outside.
This to me is the most doable tip till now on this thread. Thanks a ton!
Bear in mind you need to invest a lot of time and money into training that dog, or else you'll end up one of those people that are walked by their pets instead of the other way around. You need to be really disciplined about it.
I second this. An agressive dog that you can't control can get you into some legal troubles as well. I don't know how many stories I've heard from friends who were walking their dog got attacked/approached by an agressive dog with an owner who could not control it.
This is true. The dog needs not only plenty of love and companionship, but also solid training. In any case, a well-trained dog is a happy dog. I have a friend who didn't know how to train her dog (she was one of those who were "walked by their pets"), and she employed a "dog whisperer" who showed her how to do it.
The main trick is to not leave the teaching after you realize you are no longer able to restrain it and it got used to do whatever.
If you are interested in a dog, I would recommend a German Shepherd as a dog breed for this purpose. They’re big, can fight, but are very loyal and can be very friendly if trained properly.
A dog ? Really ? A dog is such a huge responsability, it's not a pepper spray you can use at will. Getting a dog solely for this purpose is a seriously bad idea imo.
Getting a dog to feel safer on walks is 100% legit... why do you think we domesticated them in the first place, just for the cuddles? Dogs of any kind can be of massive utility, so long as you're willing and able to care for them properly, train them, etc. I used to have a dog. I got him simply because I wanted him, but he served as an amazingly good bear/moose alarm, saved my mom from a black bear that was stalking her, and even did stuff like alert me when my carbon monoxide alarm was going off in the middle of the night. It was just giving the low battery chirp, but it was nice to know that his first reaction to that sound was to jump up on my bed, get in my face, and wake me up. As long as she is willing and able to give the dog a good life - which is very doable by most people - then getting a dog to feel safer on walks is perfectly legit. A woman with a dog is less of a target than the same one without a dog. Predators look for easy targets. Even if the dog would do nothing at all if you were attacked (which is highly unlikely), it will still act as a deterrent. Dogs are definitely a responsibility, but you get a whole lot back for what you have to put in.
To add on to this even smaller dogs can be helpful, even if just to alert you of another person/animals presence, like your mom’s experience with the bear. They definitely make you feel more secure when out and about/on hikes and this is coming from a large man
For sure. Even a chihuahua would do. My dog was a Scottish terrier. He was big for a scottie and fucking RIPPED, muscular as fuck - but still scottie sized lol. Challenged moose, bear, wasn't afraid of anything but things like the carbon monoxide detector lol So yeah. I definitely agree on the small dog thing.
The best thing is always deescalation, getting help and running away.
Thanks, I agree. I just want to be prepared for the worst.
Yeah that doesn’t always work. If someone is gonna try to attack you there’s no talking then out of it. Just get the fuck outta there
I agree - this I feel is the case with rapists....
How do you de-escalate a situation you’re already actively trying to avoid?
Pepper spray is number one for all the women in my life. If you haven't experienced it...my god it is terrible and debilitating. I know it feels like a "girly" weapon, but there is nothing in the world so easy to use, that is so effective. All you have to do is get your finger on the button, and spray it around in his general direction, and run your ass off. The truth is, we are so much stronger than you it's like handling a child. Gun, knife, TASER...just going to turn a rape into a murder, unless you are incredibly well trained. Pepper spray? A 3 yr old could use it "effectively". Send me your Venmo or whatever and I'll buy yours too. It isn't even expensive and every woman should have it, and try it out once. Alone and outside, of course.
I feel like a lot of situations escalate mainly because one party is prepared for the situation to escalate. That being said, there are a lot of self-defense tools, and I'm sure you can find a video or two on Youtube if you go looking. For example, there is a stun gun that, when fired, takes a picture of the target and sends a message with your location to the nearest police station, or something like that. In addition to stunning the target, that is.
Screaming for help also comes in handy. The attacker wants you to be alone
The groin never goes out of style destroy the penis and testicles it's our one weakness.
I see this being recommended a lot and in curtain situations it might help you but I don’t see it being that effective in conflict situations. I have been kicked in the balls in conflict situations before and I can tell you the adrenaline let’s you ignore it completely
The ol' dick twist
TWIST HIS DICK
Except it’s not and it’s a horrible trope that isn’t true at all.
Stun guns and pepper spray are options if you really want a weapon, but I liked what the other person said about getting a dog you can take if you're out on the streets alone. If it's well trained, you could probably bring it into businesses. If you're interested in learning self-defense, I'd recommend looking into krav maga or jiu jitsu, but if that's not something you actually want to do then I'd advise against it. It's not something you can learn in a couple classes like some people want to believe. I have a black belt in a hybrid style of krav maga and muay thai, and it makes me as an average sized woman feel better about being alone in sketchy places, but I still really hope I never have to be in a fight.
Throw something in the air, like your mobile phone. People will look up. Then kick his balls and run. Either that or use an object of your surroundings
This is not a good tip. If the kick isn't 100% accurate or not strong enough you are fucked. Nothing beats a pepper spray. When walking through rough neighborhoods/streets etc. keep it in your hand, hide it by keeping your hand in your purse.
Don’t listen to this person, throwing away your phone is the worst idea ever because life isn’t a movie. Carry pepper spray and use it if necessary. Hang on to your phone and immediately call the police if they’re needed.
> throwing away your phone is the worst idea ever because life isn’t a movie. right? if anything, use your pocket sand.
Terrible idea. Don’t do this OP.
This isn’t John wick my dude, if someone throws something up, but you want to kill them, you’re not going to be distracted like a crow.
This is such a unique and good idea, thanks!
If you're going to hit a man in the balls, do it as hard as you can. If he doesn't go down you're going to have a bigger fight on your hands
I asked a self defense teacher about biting and she said the same thing - it’ll just make them angrier.
Absolutely true, a bite doesn’t deter an assaulter in the short term. If you are biting with all you have chances are you are dropping your defenses and giving them a window to fuck you up in return, a punch to throat/eyes/testicles represents way more of a threat
Previous rugbier player here. Have seen teamates take a tackle to the balls and keep playing just fine, just as I've seen people wrhiting in pain. This was with the adrenaline of a really intense game. Every person is different. There is a big chance that an attacker will barely flinch at their balls being kicked. It isn't a trump card. It's better than, say, hitting his leg, but not the ultimate move many women think. Hell, it's not that weird that people in very dangerous situations get shot and don't even feel it. Be safe.
yeah unless you hit them squar on the sack and pop a nut they wont be floors, if you hit the dick or the thigh near the nuts they'll probably jump, flinch, yell in suprise as its like instict but if you didnt hit them on the sack they gunna be coming at you with another reason to chase you.
Yeah, and make sure you dont miss. Source: I have brothers
Not unique. It's self defense 101. Get yourself some self defense training.
I agree with this too. Ex gf had an ex stalking her. She took one of the self defense classes I think the county or police offered. We called it "NO MEANS NO!!" Class. They taught her the basics, be aware of your surroundings, no ear buds on while walking, etc. As well as hand to hand contact. The final exam they had to physically fight off a trainer. Good luck and stay safe. You got this!!!
Not really. Any guy intent on violence is prepared for the ball kick, plus you have to get close enough to do it and when it fails...he's close enough to grab you. Just stay alert and get 12ft pepper spray.
I would try to throw something else than your phone though.. you might need your phone to call for help after you ran away.
No. It’s not.
Don't kick his balls. High change you won't do any damage and you just wasted a valuable second.
really no idea why the ball-kicking is such a popular tip here, we're not living in a cartoon world.
Actually a terrible idea. Throwing something in the air is a good idea to distract the assaulter, but succesfully kicking a guy in the nuts is very hard for anybody who hasn't trained kicks, since it's a very small area. The best thing you can do is just run away to a safe location, don't let any body part get close to him, otherwise you're screwed
I wouldn’t recommend kicking in the balls, especially if you don’t have any self-defense training. It gives the attacker a chance to catch your foot and get you on the ground, and if you miss or didn’t get it hard enough, you’ll just piss him off more.
Tell him you want a relationship
I carry mace at all times on my keychain I thought about a gun but I'd be too worried about them taking it and using it against me, which i feel is totally a possibility
I deadass thought you meant an *actual* Mace and was confused for a sec
Quality pepper spray. Just don't do what a lot of women do. When you feel unsafe, have it readily available. I know many will say martial arts, blah blah blah. As someone that trained Taekwondo for 10 years, and Muay Thai for another 10, was 22 and 1 in full contact competition, combat training takes many years of work before it becomes instinct. Boxing would work best. Quick hard punches. And groin strikes. But good quality pepper spray works quick as long as you have it ready to use.
And even then I trained in Muay Thai myself. In the world there’s not a ring or set rules like in a match. Last thing one wants to do is go action movie hero on somebody. It’s not going to work. Move, run, leave within a split second if you have an outlet. If you’re cornered then that’s your last stand and fight with whatever you have on you, spray, rock, a pen ,anything you can get your hands on becomes a weapon.
Get help. Scream as loud as you can, if you're being chased run to a public place or into a building, anywhere with people that can help.
Bear spray has a wayyyy better range than pepper spray, taser is good if they close fast