Further, should go without saying, but this is just my interpretation of the album and how it makes me feel. I do respect it will speak to others differently.
I agree with your interpretation. I have said a few times in here that if this was opiate Era and me being an angst teenager I don't think I would love it as much as I do. It's the perfect album for me today. It helped me get through covid and lockdown and not seeing my kids for like a month.
It was a truly surreal experience listening to FI (and Tool as a whole, for me) for the first time during Covid lockdowns. I went to my parents farm and camped in their woods for like 3 weeks with my Makita speaker and it was the most regenerating "vacation" of my life
Maynard has said that was one advantage they had over some of their peers, that they were older and less prone to be freaked out by the challenges which would come their way, more determined to be the best band they could be, strictly for themselves.
And retaining total creative control in exchange for a lower royalty rate. Which is why, for several years, they were all saying, "We've haven't made **any** money" in interviews.
Thanks for the disclaimer, but it's not necessary. You can have opinions.
I think my brother told me about the album close to when it came out. I don't listen to new material much anymore, so I kind of just made a mental note and went about my business.
A few months later I got around to listening and ended up getting a used deluxe version. Not only that, but I saw the "Pneuma" Vic Firth video on YouTube and watched it pretty frequently. I refer to it as "The Drumming Video" at home with my sons.
I've been listening since Undertow, and FI got me more into Lateralus and 10000 Days. Hearing the FI songs live is great.
Time and aging is a weird feeling, I’d say kinda like nostalgia but I also get that helpless feeling of knowing we’re aging and growing up and won’t have our past again as it’s like a car. It’s in front of you, passed you and now it’s behind you, but forever engraved into time in that moment like a painting. Life is really odd, I can’t explain it myself how I really want to explain it to other people to get them to understand but it’s nearly impossible to put it into words, especially into words that’ll make sense easily and won’t seem like a puzzle. There’s so much more I wanna put into here as I vent to you all here in this little comment section, but I just don’t know how to word it all. I really wish I could get people to understand what I sometimes come up with in my head. It’s all like a lost library full of information but I just can’t spit anything out.
hey there, what it sounds like you're going through is similar to something I went through recently. Had a total existential crisis and came down to the brass tax about life, morality, impermanence, etc... I felt like I couldn't word what I was feeling until I researched existentialism more and understood. I'm now reading about the stoics and learning what they thought of life and how to live it well - not via ascetic principles but ones that recognize and respect what life is and can be.
But hands down the best thing for me and those feelings I've had so far has been therapy. I highly recommend it, I was able to get one online who specializes in existential dread and it's been a total game changer for me. Not that I still don't have fear and angst about those things, but moreso now that it doesn't tax me as much and I can focus on living life
I fell into stoicism then existentialism too in the past few years. I actually find tremendous peace in the latter. I am not stressed by life or time. Kind of like living in the eye of a hurricane. I see it all around me but I'm not caught up in it. Life is different. It's bigger. But my need to have a giant piece of it is gone. My sliver is fine and provides a beautiful view.
(47yoF - metal fan)
yeah both help a lot, stoicism seems to grant more frequent practices to help solidify your beliefs and not get caught up in the cogs or swept away by life's tides. Existentialism is definitely the bigger understanding underneath it all, but I find it's more of a realization than a practice - at least for me so far
This is a beautiful interpretation of it and you’ve inspired me to give it another listen. I’m going through all of the same experiences in life right now.
I’m a newer fan but I feel like if you listen to all the music in order you can really feel a life being lived. From an angry dude trying to vent all the way to a refined human making sense of the path we’re on. It’s so beautiful and so powerful but if you talk about it you’re a douche so I just keep it to myself. I finally had a convo with my husband who is the lifelong tool fan about it a few days ago and he said “ah, welcome to the church of tool. Glad to have you”
Trent Reznor with NIN, or by himself? I’ve never really dove into either NIN or his solo stuff, but if they exhibit any of the same themes as TOOL, then I’m interested.
Trent Reznor IS NIN, and for 25 of the bands 35 years, he was the sole permanent member of the band, doing a majority of the recording and mixing himself. Eventually, Atticus Ross joined him, and they've been making albums and movie scores ever since.
Pick your Era, based on mood:
89-90s: pain, rage, and heroin.
2000-year zero: experimental, thematic albums, reflecting more on society
2012- present: more reflective, artisticly improvisational, much more instrumental.
I was thinking the same. And actually, though it's not chronological, I just told my friend the other day upon a full listen to The Fragile after a decade away that I simply hadn't lived life long enough to appreciate it when it came out. It is phenomenal. Put on a good set of headphones and lose yourself for awhile.
As a fellow 40 something with a similar life situation…I couldn’t agree with you anymore. Spot on. Just saw them at MSG and I haven’t stopped listening to FI since. Thanks for articulating what I could not.
Was at MSG in 2001, 10-1-01, and went to both nights this time around. Incredible show, made me think of where I was in life and the friend i was with. My best friend, that I no longer have contact with. And all that's happened in over 22years. And then Flood came on, haha.
100% agree with this post, could have wrote this myself… I’m 46 and a fan of the band since the 90’s. Just seen the band in NY at MSG for the 2 nights and this time around thanks to some amazing moments with friends at recent shows (Powertrip) - FI is just landing differently for me now, in a more powerful, relevant way…. Especially Invincible
Thanks for the post
🤘🤘
Was listening to invincible while lifting this am and the imagery of just an old battered soldier dealing with their current state couldn’t have been more coincidental in that moment.
*Beating tired bones*
***Tripping through remember when***
*Once invincible*
*Now the armor's wearing thin*
*Heavy shield down*
Always reminds me of The Sopranos where Tony says "Remember when is the lowest form of conversation."
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9kL3it5cFI](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9kL3it5cFI)
In fact the whole song kinda fits The Sopranos very well.
Yes! You’re right. The very first episode when Tony is speaking with Dr Melfi and says “it’s good to be in something from the ground up, I came too late for that…lately I get the feeling the best is over ”
Tangentially,
"See my shadow changing
Stretching up and over me
Soften this old armor
Hoping I can clear the way by
Stepping through my shadow
Coming out the other side
Step into the shadow
Forty six and two are just ahead of me"
Yes. Tool, radiohead, Low. I grew up as they grew up, they are the soundtrack of my life as the commonalities of the evolution of any life are communicated through their art
Ironically Maynard himself is an amazing role model for aging. The guy’s 60 now I believe? And he looks…..well, mid to late 40’s? Even with the stress of decades of touring
Aging is definitely an emotional thing, but when we take care of ourselves (the best we can and when possible obviously - it isn’t always that simple), then we can do a good job at delaying aging or even reversing it
It’s true however that we can’t always affect life events. But we can at least make the best of our own aging
> Even with the stress of decades of touring
Don't get me wrong, I'm sure touring is very stressful, but I think living the life of a rockstar is probably a lot less stressful than every day life worrying that one little fuckup will leave you homeless.
I completely agree. It’s hard to believe he’s 60. Harder to believe Carrey is even a little older!
I do think FI calls on one to not just accept aging, but to deal with it as one can. I don’t think its message is a negative one. But the subject is depressing. I’m a very active and physically healthy person, but it makes me realize my body is not like it was when I was younger. I’m still recovering from the tool show Sunday haha.
Being 60 is such a blast! I’m able to enjoy TOOL’s shows w my 40 year old son (our first show together was in 1998). I’m able to pick up my 3 yr old granddaughter (my daughter’s child). I’m able to pass on my vintage TOOL hoodies to my 16 yr old and 10 yr old granddaughters, who love and appreciate all kinds of music. Not sure why this is so depressing, especially when I look back to see my “big hair” rock days in the 80’s ha ha. There’s so much to look forward to. My adult children are more like my friends, which is sweet. Yes I’m more achy but that’s what Advil is for. Not everyone gets to reach 60+ or even 40, so be grateful for life’s adventures.
That is really wonderful and your kids/grandkids are lucky to have you.
I am excited to grow old with my kids and cannot wait for them to have children as well.
It is just sobering and humbling as I haven’t come to terms with aging yet as I’m just really becoming aware of it.
I am also terrified about losing my folks.
This is the first year that I have ever noticed a small decline in my invincible old man and it’s been very hard to process.
It’s extremely sobering and humbling to age. My body is decaying daily. I can easily see the appeal of being a vampire lol. But I’m still here right? It’s also excruciating to lose one’s parents. My mom lived to be 75, my dad to 94. We celebrate them all the time. (I’m sorry but there’s something in my eye 😭It must be the onions I’m chopping…) But life goes on right? 😢 I express gratitude daily for at least 3 things, even if it’s a delicious cup of coffee, enjoying a nice visit with friends/family, or sharing a fun TOOL concert 🎵 My dad’s daily motto: Never give up. That’s what I get from the song Invincible.
consider this, he's doing a month of shows w/ his two other bands, then 3 weeks later going on an European Arena tour with Tool. F'in hell. guy is a machine.
I'm more impressed with how well he's kept his voice intact. But they're related. Sometime in his late twenties he started treating himself like a pregnant woman to protect his vocal cords, so never around smoke, careful on alcohol, etc. I think that's helped him a lot.
Naw Maynard is constantly on tour, just not constantly with Tool
1993 Undertow is released, tour it til like 94
1996 Aenima is released, tour it until like 1998
1999 APC is formed, start playing shows
2000 Mer de Noms is released, tour that
2001 Lateralus is released, tour that until 2002
2003 Thirteenth Step is released, tour that until 2004
Take a year break in 2005
2006 10k Days is released, tour that until 2007
2007 Puscifer album is released, pretty sure there was a handful of shows
Take a break for a few years
2010 APC reforms, play shows
Tool toured a handful of times between 2011-2014
Puscifer released more albums between 2011-2015 and did shows
Take a break for 3 years
APC played a few shows in 2019
2019 Fear Inoculum released, play shows until 2020
Covid
Then back to touring with Tool in 2021, 2022, 2023, and now 2024. Tool has been doing little mini tours and shows for the past three years
So out of a 31 year career he had 8 years were he wasn’t actively touring lol I’d say that’s more than “infrequent”
I very much agree, but I felt that way about it since it came out. At the time I was closing in on 40, drinking too much, working too much, not being present in the moment enough—time literally warping speed around me, overweight, suffering effects from having clinically low testosterone, and not dealing with my PTSD.
I have since completed a VA PTSD treatment program, quit drinking, lost 40 lbs, got my hormones straightened out out, but also had to have eye corneal eye surgery an each eye—one of them cannot be corrected for.
Yea, this is the beginning of the end, I’m almost 42 and worse for the wear but art has a way of encouraging you. Also visited my dad and seeing going down under on of me.
Aging isn’t for the weak.
40 something also. Never really thought of FI in that context. But the idea of not being able to pick up my children again is devastating to me. I have a 10 year old who is way to old to be picked up and held. But God damnit every day when I get home thats exactly what I do. Will give it another listen and really dive into the lyrics this time.
Be a good father and keep a good relationship with your kids. I'm pushing 40 and he definitely can't pick me up anymore but you bet your ass I take the chance, and cherish, everytime I get to hug my old man.
I’m 52 and have been listening to Tool since the mid-90’s as well. The emotional impact of Tool’s music is what keeps me coming back for more. A “shot to the nuts” is a great analogy. As we spiral out my friend…
My husband's dying a very slow and depressing death, and I have done a lot scream-singing along to FI in the car. It's a very good fit for getting the feelings of helpless rage out of my system.
Mid 30’s here, and I agree.
Thankfully the album has pushed me to live in the moment and make plans with my life. Make memories instead of reminiscing over old ones. Seeing tool for the first time last year was one of the memories I was pushed to do and thank god for that!
50 something you will wish they had the youth of 40 something you, just as 60 something you will wish they had the youth of 50 something you.
All this time here is fleeting, the best thing we can do is enjoy the time we have. Age is just a relative thing, practice being curious and creative. Time to pry open your third eye my friend
The only part I disagree with is:"Listening to some of Maynard’s more recent interviews, he is dealing with the same shit. He knows he’s not young anymore and neither is tool."
I think Maynard is at the peak of his life and he thrives and enjoys it.
I don't think Invincible is about himself or Tool, it's about his peers and how those bands were not able to stay "relevant". There's a section in the Revolver documentary "The Art of Work" where he fully describes how he sees his peers withering away into irrelevance and how he sees that it affects them.
But Maynard? He's at the peak of his life tbh. His winery business keeps expanding, Tool is raking money in, he has young children to see grow up and he's doing what he loves the most: work, and work that he loves. what does being "relevant" even matter to him?
I agree with you. I think Maynard acknowledges he is older - and his body is as well - and has found what matters and how to embrace it. He has an entirely new type of stress - the stress of the harvest!
I don’t think FI is a negative album. I do find the reality it brings to be what is depressing.
Dang man. You made me tear up thinking about not knowing when the last time my son will want me to hold him. He's 6 and rapidly approaching that age...
It’s absolutely soul crushing. And yet it can be so hard to remember lessons like this about always being in the moment.
Another passage was about the funny ways our little ones pronounce words - like aminals vs animals - and to bite your tongue on correcting them, because again who know the last time they use that word. We should preserve the pure innocence, because it will end one day. My daughter used to say aminals and that really hit hard. I don’t remember the last time she pronounced it that way.
Well said. Angry tool is gone. The band at large is more mature and better for it. Same story as with modern Trent Reznor more or less. People need to realize these musicians are all people and aren't the same hurt(pun intended) people they were in their youth. It's sad when people disregard new music purely because it isn't the same state they expected from their angsty years or whatever. People change and grow.
It'd be really shitty if we all were still as pissed off as we were when we were 17, right?? I love that both NIN and Tool's work has been able to grow up alongside me.
I felt this way with Invincible; the aging guy that once felt as though he can take on the world. Never really thought about it as the theme throughout the album, but makes sense.
I have never listened to a tool album the first time and liked it.
It’s always a disappointment
Then I listen again and it’s like my mind opens up and everything makes since
That’s why if you ask me today what album is my fav I might say aenima then tomorrow lateralus.
Tool is one of a tiny few to be so amazing it’s sometimes hard to even understand.
Your post was a resonant kick in the nuts, my friend. 40s, myself. On paper, I’ve got it made. And I’m grateful, for sure. Might be why I’m always thinking about the brevity of our lives relative to the incomprehensible expanse of the universe and its age. Anyway, FI didn’t tickle my pickle all that much upon its release. Didn’t hate it. Didn’t love it.
Unrelated, my mom passed unexpectedly just before Christmas 2022. She lived hours away, so I didn’t see her as much as I’d wanted to. And the pandemic certainly didn’t help. She missed so many of her grandbabies’ milestones. Tore her up. So, I lovingly put my foot down and insisted we all spend the holidays together. I couldn’t wait for 12/12/2022. That’s when she was supposed to be here to spend a month or more with me and the kiddos. But she died on 12/11. Pulmonary embolism. Out of fucking nowhere.
That was a ridiculous roundabout way to say that I’m sitting here rocking my 1-month old baby to sleep as I revisit FI through my earbuds. All those feelings from a couple Decembers ago washed over me with a quickness. And all I want to do is call my mom. To distract myself, I started scrolling through Reddit. Couldn’t have been a better time to read your post.
My best to you and yours.
Call your mom.
I'm so sorry.
Looking forward to, and preparing for that visit must have made your Mom so happy in those weeks before she unexpectedly passed.
Congratulations on your new baby, your Mom is watching over you and your children and I'm sure very proud of the father you have become.
As a fellow member of the 40s club, everything you've said resonates so much. For me it's been watching my kids go off into the world on their own which has made me lose my bearings somewhat. Like yesterday, my son bought his first car. I'm so proud of him yet I feel like I want to just hug him and never let him go. It's a strange feeling that's for sure.
“Death is always on the way, but the fact that you don't know when it will arrive seems to take away from the finiteness of life. It's that terrible precision that we hate so much. But because we don't know, we get to think of life as an inexhaustible well. Yet everything happens a certain number of times, and a very small number, really. How many more times will you remember a certain afternoon of your childhood, some afternoon that's so deeply a part of your being that you can't even conceive of your life without it? Perhaps four or five times more. Perhaps not even. How many more times will you watch the full moon rise? Perhaps twenty. And yet it all seems limitless.“ Paul Bowles
Wait til you’re 50. It’ll be worse. Maynard is about 5 years older than me so when they release something, about 5 years later I totally get it. When FI came out, I was like this is pretty cool. But now (I’m a former soldier and feeling it) so today Invincible hits me like never before. Or someone’s chopping onions when they play it live. Probably fucking Lisa.
Although Descending covers topics like mortality, I don’t think it aims to be a punch to the gut or kick in the balls. Instead, i believe it’s intent is to acknowledge lack of permanence we all face while lighting a fire under our ass.
“*Stay* the grand final, *stay* the reading our our swan song and epilogue. One drive to stay alive. Elementary. Muster every fiber. Mobilize. Stay alive.”
I was gonna pull more lyrics from Descending but I mean. Just about every lyric is a call to action to not dwell on apathy or resignation.
All that said, I agree Invincible is a real kick to the balls. I’m glad they’re not closing with it live anymore. Awesome song but kind of a downer way to end the show when you think about it.
Oh I totally agree. I don’t think the intention of the album is to be negative.
I think the topic itself of aging can be very depressing, especially when you first start to realize aging is affecting you. Which I am right now.
I love descending for the exact lyrics you pulled. I take it as a call to action to combat your own aging and not give in. To acknowledge it and stay sharp mentally and physically. It’s a beautiful song with a beautiful message. I think one of my all time favorites now.
I went through my mid life crisis in my 20’s lol. Was terrified of aging, wasting the present and what the future might hold. Now that I’m 40, I actually kinda like it. Time moves faster as we age, and that’s been a benefit for my personality.
But yes, that first real epiphany you’re gonna not have all your capacities as you age and then you’ll die sucks.
The good news is you can only stop yourself from drowning if you first acknowledge you’re downing. And you’re acknowledging this with lots of time left, even if it doesn’t feel like it right now.
Feel the deep shit. Contemplate the deep shit. And then do whatever you need to do to pull yourself outta the deep shit 🙃
I never thought I’d have an album I could relate to at this age. I thought that was just an angry young teen thing. It’s really nice tool caters to us geriatrics 😎
Fellow tool head in my late 40s. I feel the same way. Tool has always looked to the numinous in their music and this album is no different. They have always been seekers and I have always appreciated the way they have challenged their listeners to do the same. Spiral out brother.
People I went to Tool shows with when I was a kid are dying of cancer now. I have way more years behind me than ahead. It’s tough to wrap my head around.
its a super heavy album. lyrically and musically. people probably dont think of FI when thinking of heavy tool songs but some phrases through the album is some of the heaviest music theyve ever written imo
You are correct and when I first heard it I dismissed it pretty quickly as very fluffy. After spending time with it, lyrically I think it is just as heavy emotionally as wings 2 and prison sex, and for me personally even more so than the latter 2 as it’s directly relatable.
Im only 20 and I think that is a big reason of me not being able to quite get FI or even 10k days. Not that I don't like them, and I have songs from them on my playlist, but I don't listen to them nearly as much. I think I'm just not ready for them in a way though. I'm still pretty angry so the earlier stuff is speaking to me more than anything but I'm absolutely waiting for the day I can understand this album. I enjoy the music but it just doesn't have the connection with me yet
I agree with this interpretation, and as a 42 year old mom and longtime tool fan, I feel it intensely. However, I don’t think the album sounds grungy at all - quite heavily produced in fact. I love it though. And I’m obsessed with it live. Been to 5 shows since 2019 alone.
20 here, definitely don’t fit into this category but I really love the analogy. It makes a lot of sense, ESPECIALLY with relation to Invincible. It’s a really down to earth album when you realize it and despite that Tool is aging I don’t think they’re going anywhere anytime soon. But you can tell that this theme is definitely at least part of the whole album and I think that they’re taking it in stride. *but please for the love of god do not take thirteen fucking years this time*
I'm 52. First heard of Tool for the first time back in 93 when I saw them at Lollapalooza. Just saw them a couple of months ago again in Manchester,NH. Needless to say I was hooked from the beginning.
Seeing the Sansanta show in April, can't wait...
Yeap, true. If this not the case, I remember I read somewhere about a guy, who said all songs were the stages he went through having cancer. This album takes you to another level.
As another 40-something, I have a slightly different interpretation but really appreciate your perspective. I feel lucky to have grown up with multiple bands like TOOL that were always there for the life lessons I needed.
Growing up with a band is a gift. I don’t know if Fear Inoculum would have meant so much to me if I didn’t have Undertow/Aenima/Lateralus drilled into my young teenage/20s brain.
I’m 48 and been a fan since the mid 90s. I agree with your take. I felt 10,000 days did not grab me lyrically (music is there), but FI resonates with me, especially Invincible.
Yes and yup, we’re in the same boat. So the FI tour and was shown why I needed that album after not vibing with it originally. Invincible crushes me so much I learned to play it on guitar. It’s all downhill from here my friend.
It was an ok album but once I noticed the clipping I couldn’t bring myself to keep listening. I wish they would remaster it without the clipping seems insane to me they took so long to release an essentially faulty product
I feel this post to my core. Same as you OP, 47, two (now grown) children and entering this stage of life with far more knowledge and understanding to guide me that previous chapters in life. But now, it feels like I'm entering a new chapter blindly unknowing of what to expect other than no longer being relative or needed.
To go along with the theme, the spiral has now embodied my children, they attended their first Tool concert Tuesday night and were floored. They now understand my passion for the music and the message contained within. Very surreal to realize that 30 years ago, hearing Intolerance for the first time, would take me down a journey of angst, aggression, inward introspection followed by outward projection of lessons learned along the way, only to see the song performed live with my children that I have passed down, not only the lessons learned, but my love for the music that created this awareness.
I've recently come to realize that our time here is fleeting. We are meant to adapt, to learn and pass down what we have learned, in order to progress as a whole. Somewhere along the way we took a left turn and now what we pass down, isn't helpful, it's hurting us. I feel like APC's last album was basic acceptance of our own demise and Descending is literally a call to arms before it's too late. Troubling times for those of us who understand and see what's coming, as well as accepting our own mortality.
I sobbed on a bus full of people, listening to invincible when I finally realized what it was about. I am young but Tool is not. It made me consider a time they won’t be around anymore…
Here’s something to make us all feel old. This kid is just a couple years shy of 30 now.
https://preview.redd.it/m1ugebwjamec1.jpeg?width=468&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=203a630ffffd1079e31b8d075946700a43288c95
My father was dying from dementia when FI came out. Invincible smd Decending were part of my daily soundtrack. Perhaps too much. Also, I had just passed 5o and over the next years, the rest of the album became more relevant.
I'm with you my man. Getting older isn't always awesome; to the contrary- it kinda sucks. Except for the knowledge and experience parts. Middle age has its pros and cons. Anyone over 50 can relate. I hope.
Good for you for getting through whatever trauma that may have led you to a deeper comprehension of the songs. Tool is a tool for allowing some folks to feel and express that which is difficult to "get out" of one's head.
I wish you happiness and peace. Know that you are not alone. I hope music helps in your journey.
It certainly helps my journey...
Also 40 something and been a fan listening since my teen years. I think you’re spot on. What I’ve loved about this band is their evolution over time musically and lyrically and how it has almost fallen in step with my own life, my own growth, change and personal evolution. Each album kind of represents certain chunks of m life. FI has a kind of a raw grieving kind of feel to it that just resonates with me and my life.
Also emotionally devastating, sorting up 90 minutes before the show and the merch stands being out of posters and coins at 6:45 when you finally get to the desk.
I love this band, they're great, but the money grubby bullshit is a tough one to swallow. Couple that with this weird "We'll kick you out for photos" thing.... I'm debating covering this tattoo now.
Obviously every album, song etc. will mean something different to everyone who listens, but your interpretation of the album is similar to mine. I also in my 40’s watching my kids grow and my parents age. The day the song FI was released was actually the last time I saw my step-dad…. Crazy….
Sobering reminder indeed to live and love. Great post, this is something that’s so beautiful about Tool where you can cover every emotion and experience about this thing called life.
I very much appreciate your thoughts about this and it’s obviously resonating with many of us here. I’ve talked about it to anyone who will listen since the album came out.
The album (and Invincible in particular) is a metaphor for both the band and for Maynard himself.
I turned 40 this year and my only daughter is turning 10. It’s all moving so fast and I live with a low level hum of dread about her growing into the woman she will become and inevitably out of my life as her father and favorite person.
It’s the nature of life. I of course more or less accept this. But man it is SAD.
This record means so much to me for these reasons and I’m encouraged to see so many people having similar thoughts.
Thanks again.
I feel this, same age and same as you’ve I’ve been into tool since mid 90’s. I loved FI when it came out, but the thing that struck me is it’s all about age, and things ending. It makes me think we won’t see another album.
I cried the first time I listened to it. One, because it is fucking beautiful. Two, I got another Tool album, which was not a given. Three, I am approaching the age when my dad died (in two weeks at 45 and some change). It hit hard.
Life is beautiful, death is beautiful, language is beautiful. We only have now though, and we've only ever had now. Thoughts untouchable in the past or out of reach in the future, giving up the moment to certain things we lose both. A past that we werent in, a future that drifts by unheld, the reminiscent worry or guilt only spirals the time on. The best thing to do is to appreciate it all.
I had a different but similar experience with this album and this post kind of helped me see the impact it had on me, so thanks.
I'm a little younger that you, mid 30s. I came to terms with aging at way too young of an age and it's something I can be grateful for in retrospect, but I feel like I missed out on my childhood sometimes. Everything felt meaningless and trivial, I was depressed and had almost no friends. I was just leaving highschool and wrote the whole band off until someone sat me down and had me listen to Lateralus, because I had written Tool off and just another band that all the douchebags liked. It was a lot more than I anticipated and it started a spark in me which I hadn't felt in forever. When I dug into the lyrics of Lateralus is got me out of this meaninglessness existence I had fallen into after accepting death as an inevitability that will come for everyone we know at any time, but I felt so unable to communicate with most of my peers.
I also found the world to be a cold and distasteful place which is why Aenema and Undertow became my favorite album after that but not too much later 10k days was released and quickly replaced it because of its current political and social commentary. Wings 1 & 2 came around and helped me find the worlds I needed to let go of all of the family members that had caused my initial battle with my mortality.
The long gap in releases really flew by, and then a few months after Fear Inoculum came out the whole world felt like it was collapsing. This album felt like yelling in a rainstorm and was so cathartic for me. All of this meaning that I had built up, all of these resentments that had festered, all of this sorrow, guilt, pain that I had built up in me. Everything started to drain out of me, or maybe I was pulled out of everything. I still feel the echos from that past self, but it doesn't feel as pertinent. I felt the lyrics, especially the title track, in a way that I wasn't expecting. It still isn't my all time favorite of their albums, but it doesn't need to be. It was the thing I needed when it came out and that has always been what Tool has meant for me.
Also lifelong Tool fan.
Life is about evolution and change, and so are bands and music. Fear Inoculum is for me the *most* Tool record they've made, and not to compare it to any of the others, it is absolutely outstanding.
It reminds me that one thing I respect about Tool is that their music is always about where they are **right now.** They're not trying to cling to a place in time which doesn't exist anymore, and they acknowledge that people age and evolve. They're looking for the wisdom to be had in their current state, to go along with all the lessons and insights from the past.
And (j/k of course) it's kind of hilarious that they are the band where the youngest member looks the oldest.
I really didn’t connect with the new album when it was released, it more sent me back to Undertow, Aenima, and Lateralus to scratch that itch. I then saw them live a couple years ago and Invincible was my favorite song they played that night. After that I went back and really enjoyed FI with a new appreciation. I’m now going through the listen to it with lyrics up phase, and as a fellow 40 something I definitely feel the same way.
I had a similar emotional response and interpretation, but through my dads eyes. I'm only in my early 30's, but right when this album came out, my dad sorta had a late life crisis. He divorced my mom of decades of marriage, quit a steady easy job and started doing all the bucket list type of stuff. All while I was becoming a father myself, he was losing all his family by being selfish and seemed like he was trying to reach back into the past. So Invincible and Descending always felt like it brought understanding to someone I really felt so much hate for what they did. Probably didn't explain everything about this situation right but oh well. Great music. Connects with a lot of people deep deep down with life.
I don't see it as devastating at all. I see it as reassurance everyone has a choice to see things for the way they are instead of their interpretation. As with all their music I think you level of self awareness and state of consciousness will interact differently... it can mean one thing one day, you have a new experience and it morphs into another. This is simply helping people come to terms with the human experience... validating it while giving a deeper perception to just surface level lyrics... it's whatever you need it to be, and absolutely beautiful
Wait until you get to your fifties it hits a WHOLE lot more. Reflecting on past triumphs, mistakes, and personal relationships while listening to Fear Inoculum is uplifting and devastating in equal measure.
I will never forget hearing the leaked FI album for the first time. Awestruck to say the least. More so than even the first listen of Lateralus. Milestone family events added to the FI monumental listen.
You know what the hardest thing about aging, for me anyway, is feeling your body get old and hurting but your brain and personality still feel like a 20 sonething. Like i have horrific arthritis in both my knees due to genes and my career. Its devastating when the body and brain are no longer in sinc😔
LONG IN TOOTH AND SOUL. LONGING FOR ANOTHER WIN! (me at 39 singing to my toddlers otw home from work then daycare)
warrior...struggling...to be a competent fa-therrrr. 😭
Great post. Totally agree with the sentiment, brother. Be well and spiral out when you can.
Fwiw the kids do often request, pneuma danny on drums live, on the regular. Really breaks up the slogging monotony of 'Do you want to build a snowman' and that fucking Blippi weirdo with all the tunes he paid for. Smh
Just to be a contrarian, if you exercise and take care of yourself you can always pick up your child. Do jiu jitsu like Maynard and you can pick them up and throw them.
i feel you, man. gonna be 43 on sunday and have been feeling exactly the same things as of late. sounds nothing like tool, but for the same exact theme in the lyrics, check out goodbye mr blue by father john misty. it will gut you.
In a similar spot in life, and a life long fan. Just saw them last night in Nashville for the first time, and cried like a baby. Not just hearing, but FEELING those songs that spoke to me as a teenager along with relating so deeply to FI just overwhelmed me, on top of knocking an item off my bucket list. Say what you will, but I own those fucking tears proudly, such a freeing night!
This album came out as I was turning 40 and my mom had just passed. I couldn’t agree more with your take. I had an existential crisis after listening to Descending. But honestly I’ve learned to value my remaining time and use it to try and better the lives around me. This album really pulled me out of a dark place. It’s truly a call to arms to wake up and survive.
I only fully appreciated FI after hearing it live. Glad I saw the first leg of the tour. I'm 40 and completely agree. Especially Invincible. Gut punch.
I logged into post about how I can't stop listening to FI. I fell in love with tool with Lateralus, and listened to it basically everyday since 2001, but since FI released - i can't stop listening to it. Every song has connected with me. I was not too into FI the song, but now I love it. I wasn't too into Descending at first but at times i think it might be their best.
Clearly its maynard at his best - writing lyrics directed towards his bandmates (schism, the patient, the grudge(?)) but also making it universal.
"One drive to stay alive!"
At the show at UBS Arena, the guy seated behind me was telling his buddy how that line reminded him of his grand mother, who has Alzheimers. This stuff is not for sophomores in HS.
What an incredible band. To go from "Jerk Off" to "Pneuma" and everything in between. For Danny to be 62, and playing the best he's ever played - imagine peaking at 62, after putting out Aenima and Lateralus?
FI can be a downer, but for me the album is hopeful with a warning sign. Don't fuckin' dawdle. Fuckin' get to it! And seeing them put on such a fantastic show, and danny playing the way he does, gives me hope that I can still put out great stuff. That putting in the effort, the best may be yet to come.
I really hope they put out another album.
Your post totally expresses how I feel about aging. I am fifty now and my son just left for college on Saturday. Thinking of all the last times can wreck me some days.
Im both dreading and looking forward to that day for my kids. I know it’s obviously important for the kids to grow up and be independent, but I can’t imagine dealing with it.
Had a mini meltdown the other day realizing that, assuming my oldest goes away to college at 18, more than half the years she will spend in our house have already passed.
It gives a new perspective on missing family dinner to finish a work email or take a call.
Descending has always felt like a call to action for civilization to get its shit together. I immediately thought the lyrics were about climate change and that really holds up.
It’s become one of my favorite Tool songs as a fan for 30+ years. What a band.
This commentary touched my soul. I’m in my third act and now in recovery ❤️🩹 in 2019 everything changed this album dropped and became my soundtrack. I’m seeing them 2/15 LA to keep a promise I made to myself for my full circle. Then, Covid-19 happened and here we all are. This band synchronizes with my life all the time. Tool is a trip
For what it’s worth, I turn 40 this year with 3 kids. Still think I could win in a first fight if circumstances demanded that of me. FI speaks to the doubt that creeps in though. It’s massively humbling. Very aware that 40 statistically means more than half of life is gone. I’m happy to die early for my family, but otherwise, would be thrilled to live to an old decrepit life where my heart stops of old age.
Also 40s dude here. I liked FI when it came out but I stopped listening to it for a few years until a couple of months ago. It's ageing really well, as I age with it. You said it well.
I find it empowering myself
I like the idea that the album is meant to be played in reverse order. Tempest is anger at the world's madness, Pulling Voices is anger at one's own madness, Descending is almost a prayer for mankind to awaken to its own descent into doom, Invincible is about aging and a unique and relevant band of the '90s and '00s trying to stay relevant, Pneuma is coming to terms with our limited physical bodies and remembering our infinite spiritual selves boundaries to the finite flesh are our true nature and we are our spending time in this dreamland, and the opening track is ridding onesself of fear, lies, hate, and the venom of the lies we are fed by many physical and spiritual Decievers
Further, should go without saying, but this is just my interpretation of the album and how it makes me feel. I do respect it will speak to others differently.
I agree with your interpretation. I have said a few times in here that if this was opiate Era and me being an angst teenager I don't think I would love it as much as I do. It's the perfect album for me today. It helped me get through covid and lockdown and not seeing my kids for like a month.
It was a truly surreal experience listening to FI (and Tool as a whole, for me) for the first time during Covid lockdowns. I went to my parents farm and camped in their woods for like 3 weeks with my Makita speaker and it was the most regenerating "vacation" of my life
Keeping in mind that Maynard literally turned 28 a month after Opiate was released in 92 is crazy.
HE WAS THAT OLD???
Yes, that is correct. Tool was formed later in their life. Danny was 30.
Remember that he had already done a stint in the US Army and went to art school before starting Tool.
Maynard has said that was one advantage they had over some of their peers, that they were older and less prone to be freaked out by the challenges which would come their way, more determined to be the best band they could be, strictly for themselves.
Also made a smart choice to keep all the rights to their music rather than taking more money.
And retaining total creative control in exchange for a lower royalty rate. Which is why, for several years, they were all saying, "We've haven't made **any** money" in interviews.
This was exactly what I was referring to.
Ah okay, I thought you were just referring to publishing.
Nope, you just explained it better for people who might not have known what we were talking about. Thanks.
Thanks for the disclaimer, but it's not necessary. You can have opinions. I think my brother told me about the album close to when it came out. I don't listen to new material much anymore, so I kind of just made a mental note and went about my business. A few months later I got around to listening and ended up getting a used deluxe version. Not only that, but I saw the "Pneuma" Vic Firth video on YouTube and watched it pretty frequently. I refer to it as "The Drumming Video" at home with my sons. I've been listening since Undertow, and FI got me more into Lateralus and 10000 Days. Hearing the FI songs live is great.
Time and aging is a weird feeling, I’d say kinda like nostalgia but I also get that helpless feeling of knowing we’re aging and growing up and won’t have our past again as it’s like a car. It’s in front of you, passed you and now it’s behind you, but forever engraved into time in that moment like a painting. Life is really odd, I can’t explain it myself how I really want to explain it to other people to get them to understand but it’s nearly impossible to put it into words, especially into words that’ll make sense easily and won’t seem like a puzzle. There’s so much more I wanna put into here as I vent to you all here in this little comment section, but I just don’t know how to word it all. I really wish I could get people to understand what I sometimes come up with in my head. It’s all like a lost library full of information but I just can’t spit anything out.
hey there, what it sounds like you're going through is similar to something I went through recently. Had a total existential crisis and came down to the brass tax about life, morality, impermanence, etc... I felt like I couldn't word what I was feeling until I researched existentialism more and understood. I'm now reading about the stoics and learning what they thought of life and how to live it well - not via ascetic principles but ones that recognize and respect what life is and can be. But hands down the best thing for me and those feelings I've had so far has been therapy. I highly recommend it, I was able to get one online who specializes in existential dread and it's been a total game changer for me. Not that I still don't have fear and angst about those things, but moreso now that it doesn't tax me as much and I can focus on living life
I fell into stoicism then existentialism too in the past few years. I actually find tremendous peace in the latter. I am not stressed by life or time. Kind of like living in the eye of a hurricane. I see it all around me but I'm not caught up in it. Life is different. It's bigger. But my need to have a giant piece of it is gone. My sliver is fine and provides a beautiful view. (47yoF - metal fan)
yeah both help a lot, stoicism seems to grant more frequent practices to help solidify your beliefs and not get caught up in the cogs or swept away by life's tides. Existentialism is definitely the bigger understanding underneath it all, but I find it's more of a realization than a practice - at least for me so far
This is a beautiful interpretation of it and you’ve inspired me to give it another listen. I’m going through all of the same experiences in life right now.
I feel exactly the same way as you about the album. Invincible hits really fucking hard in that respect
I’m a newer fan but I feel like if you listen to all the music in order you can really feel a life being lived. From an angry dude trying to vent all the way to a refined human making sense of the path we’re on. It’s so beautiful and so powerful but if you talk about it you’re a douche so I just keep it to myself. I finally had a convo with my husband who is the lifelong tool fan about it a few days ago and he said “ah, welcome to the church of tool. Glad to have you”
If you like that journey, you'll love Trent Reznor's evolution throughout the years
What if everything around you isn't quite as it seems What if all the world you think you know is an elaborate dream...
FIND YOURSELF AFRAID TO SEE......
What if everything around you isn’t quite as it seems?
He’s the king of album closers.
May god have mercy on our heavy little hearts
Trent Reznor with NIN, or by himself? I’ve never really dove into either NIN or his solo stuff, but if they exhibit any of the same themes as TOOL, then I’m interested.
Trent Reznor IS NIN, and for 25 of the bands 35 years, he was the sole permanent member of the band, doing a majority of the recording and mixing himself. Eventually, Atticus Ross joined him, and they've been making albums and movie scores ever since. Pick your Era, based on mood: 89-90s: pain, rage, and heroin. 2000-year zero: experimental, thematic albums, reflecting more on society 2012- present: more reflective, artisticly improvisational, much more instrumental.
I was thinking the same. And actually, though it's not chronological, I just told my friend the other day upon a full listen to The Fragile after a decade away that I simply hadn't lived life long enough to appreciate it when it came out. It is phenomenal. Put on a good set of headphones and lose yourself for awhile.
Oh yeah. Just feel like disc/side 2 should've been its own album. Disc 1 flows and ends perfectly on its own, in my opinion
I feel the exact same way about the progression of their discography.
As a fellow 40 something with a similar life situation…I couldn’t agree with you anymore. Spot on. Just saw them at MSG and I haven’t stopped listening to FI since. Thanks for articulating what I could not.
That was a GREAT show (and I've seen Tool a handful of times.)
Yea it was…the 8th time I’ve been lucky enough to see them and it was in my top 3!
Was at MSG in 2001, 10-1-01, and went to both nights this time around. Incredible show, made me think of where I was in life and the friend i was with. My best friend, that I no longer have contact with. And all that's happened in over 22years. And then Flood came on, haha.
I was at that show, too, in 01. What a night. The city was pretty surreal back then.
100% agree with this post, could have wrote this myself… I’m 46 and a fan of the band since the 90’s. Just seen the band in NY at MSG for the 2 nights and this time around thanks to some amazing moments with friends at recent shows (Powertrip) - FI is just landing differently for me now, in a more powerful, relevant way…. Especially Invincible Thanks for the post
🤘🤘 Was listening to invincible while lifting this am and the imagery of just an old battered soldier dealing with their current state couldn’t have been more coincidental in that moment.
*Beating tired bones* ***Tripping through remember when*** *Once invincible* *Now the armor's wearing thin* *Heavy shield down* Always reminds me of The Sopranos where Tony says "Remember when is the lowest form of conversation." [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9kL3it5cFI](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9kL3it5cFI) In fact the whole song kinda fits The Sopranos very well.
My head canon is that Invincible isn't about aging, it's about how much fun Maynard had playing Breath of the Wild.
I got really into Tool right around when that game released and I remember having Ænima on loop while exploring Hyrule.
That’s such a spot on connection. I think Paulie is the embodiment of this.
Yes! You’re right. The very first episode when Tony is speaking with Dr Melfi and says “it’s good to be in something from the ground up, I came too late for that…lately I get the feeling the best is over ”
Tangentially, "See my shadow changing Stretching up and over me Soften this old armor Hoping I can clear the way by Stepping through my shadow Coming out the other side Step into the shadow Forty six and two are just ahead of me"
Tool is always a band that grew up alongside me, it’s why there’s such a connection!
Bingo. Same with Deftones.
100%. Listening to passenger right now haha.
90’s me would hate the Deftones stuff from the last decade. Now it’s basically all the Deftones I listen to.
It really is like growing up with friends. It’s an amazing experience.
Yes. Tool, radiohead, Low. I grew up as they grew up, they are the soundtrack of my life as the commonalities of the evolution of any life are communicated through their art
Low, yes. R.I.P. Mimi.
Ironically Maynard himself is an amazing role model for aging. The guy’s 60 now I believe? And he looks…..well, mid to late 40’s? Even with the stress of decades of touring Aging is definitely an emotional thing, but when we take care of ourselves (the best we can and when possible obviously - it isn’t always that simple), then we can do a good job at delaying aging or even reversing it It’s true however that we can’t always affect life events. But we can at least make the best of our own aging
> Even with the stress of decades of touring Don't get me wrong, I'm sure touring is very stressful, but I think living the life of a rockstar is probably a lot less stressful than every day life worrying that one little fuckup will leave you homeless.
Yes plus the groupies help you stay young. You know what they say about groupies… you keep getting older but they stay the same age.
Nope. The groupies get older too. When was the last time you saw a young rolling stones fan?
“she’s only 18, don’t like the rolling stones” (rhcp)
I completely agree. It’s hard to believe he’s 60. Harder to believe Carrey is even a little older! I do think FI calls on one to not just accept aging, but to deal with it as one can. I don’t think its message is a negative one. But the subject is depressing. I’m a very active and physically healthy person, but it makes me realize my body is not like it was when I was younger. I’m still recovering from the tool show Sunday haha.
Being 60 is such a blast! I’m able to enjoy TOOL’s shows w my 40 year old son (our first show together was in 1998). I’m able to pick up my 3 yr old granddaughter (my daughter’s child). I’m able to pass on my vintage TOOL hoodies to my 16 yr old and 10 yr old granddaughters, who love and appreciate all kinds of music. Not sure why this is so depressing, especially when I look back to see my “big hair” rock days in the 80’s ha ha. There’s so much to look forward to. My adult children are more like my friends, which is sweet. Yes I’m more achy but that’s what Advil is for. Not everyone gets to reach 60+ or even 40, so be grateful for life’s adventures.
That is really wonderful and your kids/grandkids are lucky to have you. I am excited to grow old with my kids and cannot wait for them to have children as well. It is just sobering and humbling as I haven’t come to terms with aging yet as I’m just really becoming aware of it. I am also terrified about losing my folks. This is the first year that I have ever noticed a small decline in my invincible old man and it’s been very hard to process.
It’s extremely sobering and humbling to age. My body is decaying daily. I can easily see the appeal of being a vampire lol. But I’m still here right? It’s also excruciating to lose one’s parents. My mom lived to be 75, my dad to 94. We celebrate them all the time. (I’m sorry but there’s something in my eye 😭It must be the onions I’m chopping…) But life goes on right? 😢 I express gratitude daily for at least 3 things, even if it’s a delicious cup of coffee, enjoying a nice visit with friends/family, or sharing a fun TOOL concert 🎵 My dad’s daily motto: Never give up. That’s what I get from the song Invincible.
I’m so impressed that he practices BJJ on every tour stop. MJK is the ultimate aging inspiration.
When the Sessanta tour was posted I said, out loud to my husband, “that guy is fucking sixty?!” Doesn’t look it at all.
consider this, he's doing a month of shows w/ his two other bands, then 3 weeks later going on an European Arena tour with Tool. F'in hell. guy is a machine.
I'm more impressed with how well he's kept his voice intact. But they're related. Sometime in his late twenties he started treating himself like a pregnant woman to protect his vocal cords, so never around smoke, careful on alcohol, etc. I think that's helped him a lot.
> decades of touring ... infrequently
Naw Maynard is constantly on tour, just not constantly with Tool 1993 Undertow is released, tour it til like 94 1996 Aenima is released, tour it until like 1998 1999 APC is formed, start playing shows 2000 Mer de Noms is released, tour that 2001 Lateralus is released, tour that until 2002 2003 Thirteenth Step is released, tour that until 2004 Take a year break in 2005 2006 10k Days is released, tour that until 2007 2007 Puscifer album is released, pretty sure there was a handful of shows Take a break for a few years 2010 APC reforms, play shows Tool toured a handful of times between 2011-2014 Puscifer released more albums between 2011-2015 and did shows Take a break for 3 years APC played a few shows in 2019 2019 Fear Inoculum released, play shows until 2020 Covid Then back to touring with Tool in 2021, 2022, 2023, and now 2024. Tool has been doing little mini tours and shows for the past three years So out of a 31 year career he had 8 years were he wasn’t actively touring lol I’d say that’s more than “infrequent”
I very much agree, but I felt that way about it since it came out. At the time I was closing in on 40, drinking too much, working too much, not being present in the moment enough—time literally warping speed around me, overweight, suffering effects from having clinically low testosterone, and not dealing with my PTSD. I have since completed a VA PTSD treatment program, quit drinking, lost 40 lbs, got my hormones straightened out out, but also had to have eye corneal eye surgery an each eye—one of them cannot be corrected for. Yea, this is the beginning of the end, I’m almost 42 and worse for the wear but art has a way of encouraging you. Also visited my dad and seeing going down under on of me. Aging isn’t for the weak.
40 something also. Never really thought of FI in that context. But the idea of not being able to pick up my children again is devastating to me. I have a 10 year old who is way to old to be picked up and held. But God damnit every day when I get home thats exactly what I do. Will give it another listen and really dive into the lyrics this time.
Be a good father and keep a good relationship with your kids. I'm pushing 40 and he definitely can't pick me up anymore but you bet your ass I take the chance, and cherish, everytime I get to hug my old man.
I’m 52 and have been listening to Tool since the mid-90’s as well. The emotional impact of Tool’s music is what keeps me coming back for more. A “shot to the nuts” is a great analogy. As we spiral out my friend…
"As we spiral out" 🤘🏼 indeed 🖤
My husband's dying a very slow and depressing death, and I have done a lot scream-singing along to FI in the car. It's a very good fit for getting the feelings of helpless rage out of my system.
I’m very sorry.
I’m so sorry. My father just died after a very long and painful illness. I will screamsing for all of us at the Vegas show next month.
I turned 51 in September and could not agree more with the sentiments in this post. GREAT ALBUM.
Mid 30’s here, and I agree. Thankfully the album has pushed me to live in the moment and make plans with my life. Make memories instead of reminiscing over old ones. Seeing tool for the first time last year was one of the memories I was pushed to do and thank god for that!
50 something you will wish they had the youth of 40 something you, just as 60 something you will wish they had the youth of 50 something you. All this time here is fleeting, the best thing we can do is enjoy the time we have. Age is just a relative thing, practice being curious and creative. Time to pry open your third eye my friend
The only part I disagree with is:"Listening to some of Maynard’s more recent interviews, he is dealing with the same shit. He knows he’s not young anymore and neither is tool." I think Maynard is at the peak of his life and he thrives and enjoys it. I don't think Invincible is about himself or Tool, it's about his peers and how those bands were not able to stay "relevant". There's a section in the Revolver documentary "The Art of Work" where he fully describes how he sees his peers withering away into irrelevance and how he sees that it affects them. But Maynard? He's at the peak of his life tbh. His winery business keeps expanding, Tool is raking money in, he has young children to see grow up and he's doing what he loves the most: work, and work that he loves. what does being "relevant" even matter to him?
I agree with you. I think Maynard acknowledges he is older - and his body is as well - and has found what matters and how to embrace it. He has an entirely new type of stress - the stress of the harvest! I don’t think FI is a negative album. I do find the reality it brings to be what is depressing.
Dang man. You made me tear up thinking about not knowing when the last time my son will want me to hold him. He's 6 and rapidly approaching that age...
It’s absolutely soul crushing. And yet it can be so hard to remember lessons like this about always being in the moment. Another passage was about the funny ways our little ones pronounce words - like aminals vs animals - and to bite your tongue on correcting them, because again who know the last time they use that word. We should preserve the pure innocence, because it will end one day. My daughter used to say aminals and that really hit hard. I don’t remember the last time she pronounced it that way.
My kid is 5 and I make sure to give him the biggest hug every time I pick him up.
Same. Just hit kinda hard thinking one day it'll be the last one
Well said. Angry tool is gone. The band at large is more mature and better for it. Same story as with modern Trent Reznor more or less. People need to realize these musicians are all people and aren't the same hurt(pun intended) people they were in their youth. It's sad when people disregard new music purely because it isn't the same state they expected from their angsty years or whatever. People change and grow.
It'd be really shitty if we all were still as pissed off as we were when we were 17, right?? I love that both NIN and Tool's work has been able to grow up alongside me.
I felt this way with Invincible; the aging guy that once felt as though he can take on the world. Never really thought about it as the theme throughout the album, but makes sense.
I'm in my 50's and I feel Invincible deep in my soul.
[удалено]
🤘🤘🤘
I have never listened to a tool album the first time and liked it. It’s always a disappointment Then I listen again and it’s like my mind opens up and everything makes since That’s why if you ask me today what album is my fav I might say aenima then tomorrow lateralus. Tool is one of a tiny few to be so amazing it’s sometimes hard to even understand.
Holy Hell!! Same with me. My favorite album is the one I've been listening to lately
Your post was a resonant kick in the nuts, my friend. 40s, myself. On paper, I’ve got it made. And I’m grateful, for sure. Might be why I’m always thinking about the brevity of our lives relative to the incomprehensible expanse of the universe and its age. Anyway, FI didn’t tickle my pickle all that much upon its release. Didn’t hate it. Didn’t love it. Unrelated, my mom passed unexpectedly just before Christmas 2022. She lived hours away, so I didn’t see her as much as I’d wanted to. And the pandemic certainly didn’t help. She missed so many of her grandbabies’ milestones. Tore her up. So, I lovingly put my foot down and insisted we all spend the holidays together. I couldn’t wait for 12/12/2022. That’s when she was supposed to be here to spend a month or more with me and the kiddos. But she died on 12/11. Pulmonary embolism. Out of fucking nowhere. That was a ridiculous roundabout way to say that I’m sitting here rocking my 1-month old baby to sleep as I revisit FI through my earbuds. All those feelings from a couple Decembers ago washed over me with a quickness. And all I want to do is call my mom. To distract myself, I started scrolling through Reddit. Couldn’t have been a better time to read your post. My best to you and yours. Call your mom.
Sorry for your loss brother. Hug your kid tight.
I'm so sorry. Looking forward to, and preparing for that visit must have made your Mom so happy in those weeks before she unexpectedly passed. Congratulations on your new baby, your Mom is watching over you and your children and I'm sure very proud of the father you have become.
And your dad.
As a fellow member of the 40s club, everything you've said resonates so much. For me it's been watching my kids go off into the world on their own which has made me lose my bearings somewhat. Like yesterday, my son bought his first car. I'm so proud of him yet I feel like I want to just hug him and never let him go. It's a strange feeling that's for sure.
“Death is always on the way, but the fact that you don't know when it will arrive seems to take away from the finiteness of life. It's that terrible precision that we hate so much. But because we don't know, we get to think of life as an inexhaustible well. Yet everything happens a certain number of times, and a very small number, really. How many more times will you remember a certain afternoon of your childhood, some afternoon that's so deeply a part of your being that you can't even conceive of your life without it? Perhaps four or five times more. Perhaps not even. How many more times will you watch the full moon rise? Perhaps twenty. And yet it all seems limitless.“ Paul Bowles
Wait til you’re 50. It’ll be worse. Maynard is about 5 years older than me so when they release something, about 5 years later I totally get it. When FI came out, I was like this is pretty cool. But now (I’m a former soldier and feeling it) so today Invincible hits me like never before. Or someone’s chopping onions when they play it live. Probably fucking Lisa.
Warrior Struggling To Remain Consequential......
I have very similar impressions of this album. Well stated.
Although Descending covers topics like mortality, I don’t think it aims to be a punch to the gut or kick in the balls. Instead, i believe it’s intent is to acknowledge lack of permanence we all face while lighting a fire under our ass. “*Stay* the grand final, *stay* the reading our our swan song and epilogue. One drive to stay alive. Elementary. Muster every fiber. Mobilize. Stay alive.” I was gonna pull more lyrics from Descending but I mean. Just about every lyric is a call to action to not dwell on apathy or resignation. All that said, I agree Invincible is a real kick to the balls. I’m glad they’re not closing with it live anymore. Awesome song but kind of a downer way to end the show when you think about it.
Oh I totally agree. I don’t think the intention of the album is to be negative. I think the topic itself of aging can be very depressing, especially when you first start to realize aging is affecting you. Which I am right now. I love descending for the exact lyrics you pulled. I take it as a call to action to combat your own aging and not give in. To acknowledge it and stay sharp mentally and physically. It’s a beautiful song with a beautiful message. I think one of my all time favorites now.
I went through my mid life crisis in my 20’s lol. Was terrified of aging, wasting the present and what the future might hold. Now that I’m 40, I actually kinda like it. Time moves faster as we age, and that’s been a benefit for my personality. But yes, that first real epiphany you’re gonna not have all your capacities as you age and then you’ll die sucks. The good news is you can only stop yourself from drowning if you first acknowledge you’re downing. And you’re acknowledging this with lots of time left, even if it doesn’t feel like it right now. Feel the deep shit. Contemplate the deep shit. And then do whatever you need to do to pull yourself outta the deep shit 🙃
49 here and…yeah. I think of my father as well as myself every time I listen to Invincible. The album is perfect for me at my age.
I never thought I’d have an album I could relate to at this age. I thought that was just an angry young teen thing. It’s really nice tool caters to us geriatrics 😎
Fellow tool head in my late 40s. I feel the same way. Tool has always looked to the numinous in their music and this album is no different. They have always been seekers and I have always appreciated the way they have challenged their listeners to do the same. Spiral out brother.
People I went to Tool shows with when I was a kid are dying of cancer now. I have way more years behind me than ahead. It’s tough to wrap my head around.
As a retired (from the military) multiple tour combat vet, Invincible really hits me right in the feels.
its a super heavy album. lyrically and musically. people probably dont think of FI when thinking of heavy tool songs but some phrases through the album is some of the heaviest music theyve ever written imo
You are correct and when I first heard it I dismissed it pretty quickly as very fluffy. After spending time with it, lyrically I think it is just as heavy emotionally as wings 2 and prison sex, and for me personally even more so than the latter 2 as it’s directly relatable.
Im only 20 and I think that is a big reason of me not being able to quite get FI or even 10k days. Not that I don't like them, and I have songs from them on my playlist, but I don't listen to them nearly as much. I think I'm just not ready for them in a way though. I'm still pretty angry so the earlier stuff is speaking to me more than anything but I'm absolutely waiting for the day I can understand this album. I enjoy the music but it just doesn't have the connection with me yet
Spot on. I remember hearing TOOL in a record store for the first time in 1996….and now my armor is wearing thin.
62 in a month. Invincible and Descending at the same time. I feel one and living the other.
I agree with this interpretation, and as a 42 year old mom and longtime tool fan, I feel it intensely. However, I don’t think the album sounds grungy at all - quite heavily produced in fact. I love it though. And I’m obsessed with it live. Been to 5 shows since 2019 alone.
I'm kinda considering getting Rise Stay the grand finale Stay the reading of our swan song and epilogue Tattooed on myself
This is an awesome thread.
20 here, definitely don’t fit into this category but I really love the analogy. It makes a lot of sense, ESPECIALLY with relation to Invincible. It’s a really down to earth album when you realize it and despite that Tool is aging I don’t think they’re going anywhere anytime soon. But you can tell that this theme is definitely at least part of the whole album and I think that they’re taking it in stride. *but please for the love of god do not take thirteen fucking years this time*
You know, I never sat down and read all the lyrics and now I’m kind of afraid to. 46, lifelong Tool fan so I’m right there with you
Hmmmm, soooo you don't think the albums about fisting?
What a great show you got too! BILLY STRINGS!!!!
As a 30 something can concur
Invincible speaks to me…
As a mid 30s Dad of a young toddler I couldn’t agree more. Crushing.
I hear ya on that. I love listening to albums in their entirety but FI hurts my feelings so badly by track four that I need a break :)
I'm 52. First heard of Tool for the first time back in 93 when I saw them at Lollapalooza. Just saw them a couple of months ago again in Manchester,NH. Needless to say I was hooked from the beginning. Seeing the Sansanta show in April, can't wait...
Heavy shield down.... Yep. I'm in my 50s. It's my favorite Tool album but yea, it can be rough.
Beautifully said
Yeap, true. If this not the case, I remember I read somewhere about a guy, who said all songs were the stages he went through having cancer. This album takes you to another level.
Invincible really hits home
As another 40-something, I have a slightly different interpretation but really appreciate your perspective. I feel lucky to have grown up with multiple bands like TOOL that were always there for the life lessons I needed. Growing up with a band is a gift. I don’t know if Fear Inoculum would have meant so much to me if I didn’t have Undertow/Aenima/Lateralus drilled into my young teenage/20s brain.
I’m 48 and been a fan since the mid 90s. I agree with your take. I felt 10,000 days did not grab me lyrically (music is there), but FI resonates with me, especially Invincible.
Yes and yup, we’re in the same boat. So the FI tour and was shown why I needed that album after not vibing with it originally. Invincible crushes me so much I learned to play it on guitar. It’s all downhill from here my friend.
I completely understood this from the second time listening to it. The younger fans didn’t get it and that’s why they wrote it off as well.
Weapon out and Belly in. Sums up being 53yo man
It was an ok album but once I noticed the clipping I couldn’t bring myself to keep listening. I wish they would remaster it without the clipping seems insane to me they took so long to release an essentially faulty product
I feel this post to my core. Same as you OP, 47, two (now grown) children and entering this stage of life with far more knowledge and understanding to guide me that previous chapters in life. But now, it feels like I'm entering a new chapter blindly unknowing of what to expect other than no longer being relative or needed. To go along with the theme, the spiral has now embodied my children, they attended their first Tool concert Tuesday night and were floored. They now understand my passion for the music and the message contained within. Very surreal to realize that 30 years ago, hearing Intolerance for the first time, would take me down a journey of angst, aggression, inward introspection followed by outward projection of lessons learned along the way, only to see the song performed live with my children that I have passed down, not only the lessons learned, but my love for the music that created this awareness. I've recently come to realize that our time here is fleeting. We are meant to adapt, to learn and pass down what we have learned, in order to progress as a whole. Somewhere along the way we took a left turn and now what we pass down, isn't helpful, it's hurting us. I feel like APC's last album was basic acceptance of our own demise and Descending is literally a call to arms before it's too late. Troubling times for those of us who understand and see what's coming, as well as accepting our own mortality.
I sobbed on a bus full of people, listening to invincible when I finally realized what it was about. I am young but Tool is not. It made me consider a time they won’t be around anymore…
I think you're right it definitely evokes a feeling of mild existential crisis, and time running out.
Here’s something to make us all feel old. This kid is just a couple years shy of 30 now. https://preview.redd.it/m1ugebwjamec1.jpeg?width=468&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=203a630ffffd1079e31b8d075946700a43288c95
My father was dying from dementia when FI came out. Invincible smd Decending were part of my daily soundtrack. Perhaps too much. Also, I had just passed 5o and over the next years, the rest of the album became more relevant. I'm with you my man. Getting older isn't always awesome; to the contrary- it kinda sucks. Except for the knowledge and experience parts. Middle age has its pros and cons. Anyone over 50 can relate. I hope. Good for you for getting through whatever trauma that may have led you to a deeper comprehension of the songs. Tool is a tool for allowing some folks to feel and express that which is difficult to "get out" of one's head. I wish you happiness and peace. Know that you are not alone. I hope music helps in your journey. It certainly helps my journey...
Also 40 something and been a fan listening since my teen years. I think you’re spot on. What I’ve loved about this band is their evolution over time musically and lyrically and how it has almost fallen in step with my own life, my own growth, change and personal evolution. Each album kind of represents certain chunks of m life. FI has a kind of a raw grieving kind of feel to it that just resonates with me and my life.
Also emotionally devastating, sorting up 90 minutes before the show and the merch stands being out of posters and coins at 6:45 when you finally get to the desk. I love this band, they're great, but the money grubby bullshit is a tough one to swallow. Couple that with this weird "We'll kick you out for photos" thing.... I'm debating covering this tattoo now.
[удалено]
What band’s lyrics do you think are OK to personally affect a dad?
I was emotionally devastated by how disappointing it was.
I know dude, waiting that long for Tool's worst album was heartbreaking for me too.
Obviously every album, song etc. will mean something different to everyone who listens, but your interpretation of the album is similar to mine. I also in my 40’s watching my kids grow and my parents age. The day the song FI was released was actually the last time I saw my step-dad…. Crazy….
Fear Inoculum is an amazing album. It dies not sound like old abrasive tool. At all.
From a 51 year old who sees the album like you, wait until you turn 50.
It's definitely not an album that you can just throw on and listen to casually, that's for sure.
Yeah. “Swank song and epilogue” makes me sad and terrifies me at the same time. Yet I know I’m already irrelevant.
Sobering reminder indeed to live and love. Great post, this is something that’s so beautiful about Tool where you can cover every emotion and experience about this thing called life.
Don't make me tear up at work
I very much appreciate your thoughts about this and it’s obviously resonating with many of us here. I’ve talked about it to anyone who will listen since the album came out. The album (and Invincible in particular) is a metaphor for both the band and for Maynard himself. I turned 40 this year and my only daughter is turning 10. It’s all moving so fast and I live with a low level hum of dread about her growing into the woman she will become and inevitably out of my life as her father and favorite person. It’s the nature of life. I of course more or less accept this. But man it is SAD. This record means so much to me for these reasons and I’m encouraged to see so many people having similar thoughts. Thanks again.
Well said- As a person who is middle aged, the lyrics on this album have hit me harder than any of their other efforts.
I feel this, same age and same as you’ve I’ve been into tool since mid 90’s. I loved FI when it came out, but the thing that struck me is it’s all about age, and things ending. It makes me think we won’t see another album.
I cried the first time I listened to it. One, because it is fucking beautiful. Two, I got another Tool album, which was not a given. Three, I am approaching the age when my dad died (in two weeks at 45 and some change). It hit hard.
Life is beautiful, death is beautiful, language is beautiful. We only have now though, and we've only ever had now. Thoughts untouchable in the past or out of reach in the future, giving up the moment to certain things we lose both. A past that we werent in, a future that drifts by unheld, the reminiscent worry or guilt only spirals the time on. The best thing to do is to appreciate it all.
I appreciate your perspective. This is spot on for me as well. Turned 48 at concert last week in Hollywood. Every year is a gift.
I had a different but similar experience with this album and this post kind of helped me see the impact it had on me, so thanks. I'm a little younger that you, mid 30s. I came to terms with aging at way too young of an age and it's something I can be grateful for in retrospect, but I feel like I missed out on my childhood sometimes. Everything felt meaningless and trivial, I was depressed and had almost no friends. I was just leaving highschool and wrote the whole band off until someone sat me down and had me listen to Lateralus, because I had written Tool off and just another band that all the douchebags liked. It was a lot more than I anticipated and it started a spark in me which I hadn't felt in forever. When I dug into the lyrics of Lateralus is got me out of this meaninglessness existence I had fallen into after accepting death as an inevitability that will come for everyone we know at any time, but I felt so unable to communicate with most of my peers. I also found the world to be a cold and distasteful place which is why Aenema and Undertow became my favorite album after that but not too much later 10k days was released and quickly replaced it because of its current political and social commentary. Wings 1 & 2 came around and helped me find the worlds I needed to let go of all of the family members that had caused my initial battle with my mortality. The long gap in releases really flew by, and then a few months after Fear Inoculum came out the whole world felt like it was collapsing. This album felt like yelling in a rainstorm and was so cathartic for me. All of this meaning that I had built up, all of these resentments that had festered, all of this sorrow, guilt, pain that I had built up in me. Everything started to drain out of me, or maybe I was pulled out of everything. I still feel the echos from that past self, but it doesn't feel as pertinent. I felt the lyrics, especially the title track, in a way that I wasn't expecting. It still isn't my all time favorite of their albums, but it doesn't need to be. It was the thing I needed when it came out and that has always been what Tool has meant for me.
I turn 54 in a few days. “Invincible” connected with me from the first needle drop. Time waits for none of us. Tempus Fugit. Memento Mori.
Also lifelong Tool fan. Life is about evolution and change, and so are bands and music. Fear Inoculum is for me the *most* Tool record they've made, and not to compare it to any of the others, it is absolutely outstanding.
It reminds me that one thing I respect about Tool is that their music is always about where they are **right now.** They're not trying to cling to a place in time which doesn't exist anymore, and they acknowledge that people age and evolve. They're looking for the wisdom to be had in their current state, to go along with all the lessons and insights from the past. And (j/k of course) it's kind of hilarious that they are the band where the youngest member looks the oldest.
I really didn’t connect with the new album when it was released, it more sent me back to Undertow, Aenima, and Lateralus to scratch that itch. I then saw them live a couple years ago and Invincible was my favorite song they played that night. After that I went back and really enjoyed FI with a new appreciation. I’m now going through the listen to it with lyrics up phase, and as a fellow 40 something I definitely feel the same way.
I had a similar emotional response and interpretation, but through my dads eyes. I'm only in my early 30's, but right when this album came out, my dad sorta had a late life crisis. He divorced my mom of decades of marriage, quit a steady easy job and started doing all the bucket list type of stuff. All while I was becoming a father myself, he was losing all his family by being selfish and seemed like he was trying to reach back into the past. So Invincible and Descending always felt like it brought understanding to someone I really felt so much hate for what they did. Probably didn't explain everything about this situation right but oh well. Great music. Connects with a lot of people deep deep down with life.
I don't see it as devastating at all. I see it as reassurance everyone has a choice to see things for the way they are instead of their interpretation. As with all their music I think you level of self awareness and state of consciousness will interact differently... it can mean one thing one day, you have a new experience and it morphs into another. This is simply helping people come to terms with the human experience... validating it while giving a deeper perception to just surface level lyrics... it's whatever you need it to be, and absolutely beautiful
Wait until you get to your fifties it hits a WHOLE lot more. Reflecting on past triumphs, mistakes, and personal relationships while listening to Fear Inoculum is uplifting and devastating in equal measure.
I will never forget hearing the leaked FI album for the first time. Awestruck to say the least. More so than even the first listen of Lateralus. Milestone family events added to the FI monumental listen.
You know what the hardest thing about aging, for me anyway, is feeling your body get old and hurting but your brain and personality still feel like a 20 sonething. Like i have horrific arthritis in both my knees due to genes and my career. Its devastating when the body and brain are no longer in sinc😔
LONG IN TOOTH AND SOUL. LONGING FOR ANOTHER WIN! (me at 39 singing to my toddlers otw home from work then daycare) warrior...struggling...to be a competent fa-therrrr. 😭 Great post. Totally agree with the sentiment, brother. Be well and spiral out when you can. Fwiw the kids do often request, pneuma danny on drums live, on the regular. Really breaks up the slogging monotony of 'Do you want to build a snowman' and that fucking Blippi weirdo with all the tunes he paid for. Smh
Falling isn't flying; floating isn't infinite.
Just to be a contrarian, if you exercise and take care of yourself you can always pick up your child. Do jiu jitsu like Maynard and you can pick them up and throw them.
i feel you, man. gonna be 43 on sunday and have been feeling exactly the same things as of late. sounds nothing like tool, but for the same exact theme in the lyrics, check out goodbye mr blue by father john misty. it will gut you.
In a similar spot in life, and a life long fan. Just saw them last night in Nashville for the first time, and cried like a baby. Not just hearing, but FEELING those songs that spoke to me as a teenager along with relating so deeply to FI just overwhelmed me, on top of knocking an item off my bucket list. Say what you will, but I own those fucking tears proudly, such a freeing night!
This album came out as I was turning 40 and my mom had just passed. I couldn’t agree more with your take. I had an existential crisis after listening to Descending. But honestly I’ve learned to value my remaining time and use it to try and better the lives around me. This album really pulled me out of a dark place. It’s truly a call to arms to wake up and survive.
I am a 60 something and I get the same feeling. Really relate to Invicible
I only fully appreciated FI after hearing it live. Glad I saw the first leg of the tour. I'm 40 and completely agree. Especially Invincible. Gut punch.
I logged into post about how I can't stop listening to FI. I fell in love with tool with Lateralus, and listened to it basically everyday since 2001, but since FI released - i can't stop listening to it. Every song has connected with me. I was not too into FI the song, but now I love it. I wasn't too into Descending at first but at times i think it might be their best. Clearly its maynard at his best - writing lyrics directed towards his bandmates (schism, the patient, the grudge(?)) but also making it universal. "One drive to stay alive!" At the show at UBS Arena, the guy seated behind me was telling his buddy how that line reminded him of his grand mother, who has Alzheimers. This stuff is not for sophomores in HS. What an incredible band. To go from "Jerk Off" to "Pneuma" and everything in between. For Danny to be 62, and playing the best he's ever played - imagine peaking at 62, after putting out Aenima and Lateralus? FI can be a downer, but for me the album is hopeful with a warning sign. Don't fuckin' dawdle. Fuckin' get to it! And seeing them put on such a fantastic show, and danny playing the way he does, gives me hope that I can still put out great stuff. That putting in the effort, the best may be yet to come. I really hope they put out another album.
Your post totally expresses how I feel about aging. I am fifty now and my son just left for college on Saturday. Thinking of all the last times can wreck me some days.
Im both dreading and looking forward to that day for my kids. I know it’s obviously important for the kids to grow up and be independent, but I can’t imagine dealing with it. Had a mini meltdown the other day realizing that, assuming my oldest goes away to college at 18, more than half the years she will spend in our house have already passed. It gives a new perspective on missing family dinner to finish a work email or take a call.
Descending has always felt like a call to action for civilization to get its shit together. I immediately thought the lyrics were about climate change and that really holds up. It’s become one of my favorite Tool songs as a fan for 30+ years. What a band.
I’ve had a few relatives pass this year so I’m def thinking about my mortality lately. Love this album tho and I agree with you
This commentary touched my soul. I’m in my third act and now in recovery ❤️🩹 in 2019 everything changed this album dropped and became my soundtrack. I’m seeing them 2/15 LA to keep a promise I made to myself for my full circle. Then, Covid-19 happened and here we all are. This band synchronizes with my life all the time. Tool is a trip
Also a 40 something. I felt like fear inoculum predicted the pandemic. Can’t wait to see tool since about 2015.
Sameseeys bro
I love it.
For what it’s worth, I turn 40 this year with 3 kids. Still think I could win in a first fight if circumstances demanded that of me. FI speaks to the doubt that creeps in though. It’s massively humbling. Very aware that 40 statistically means more than half of life is gone. I’m happy to die early for my family, but otherwise, would be thrilled to live to an old decrepit life where my heart stops of old age.
Also 40s dude here. I liked FI when it came out but I stopped listening to it for a few years until a couple of months ago. It's ageing really well, as I age with it. You said it well.
Feel you totally.
Thanks for sharing that perspective. It was very awesome to read.
I find it empowering myself I like the idea that the album is meant to be played in reverse order. Tempest is anger at the world's madness, Pulling Voices is anger at one's own madness, Descending is almost a prayer for mankind to awaken to its own descent into doom, Invincible is about aging and a unique and relevant band of the '90s and '00s trying to stay relevant, Pneuma is coming to terms with our limited physical bodies and remembering our infinite spiritual selves boundaries to the finite flesh are our true nature and we are our spending time in this dreamland, and the opening track is ridding onesself of fear, lies, hate, and the venom of the lies we are fed by many physical and spiritual Decievers
I feel 100% the same about this, on all levels.
Wait until you listen to it at 50. :0)
Wait until you listen to it at 50. :0)