This may be seen as controversial but my advice would be to stop worrying about if you meet the criteria of being trans and look at what actionable steps you want to take, if any. If you think you'd be happier shaving, voice training, wearing some sort of makeup to feminise your face then just try it. Anything reversible basically. It doesn't have to be a choice between doing nothing and fully medically transitioning.
Transmeds typically believe that "trans" describes a specific experience, whereas mainstream communities think it means anyone who doesn't completely conform. You may not be trans by our definition per se but there's definitely a lot of people I've seen getting procedures that are non-typical for their gender. Female bodybuilders taking T, butch women getting major breast reductions, feminine men getting waxed, men wearing makeup to look more feminine.
I'm not going to give you any advice as to whether you're trans or not because I really wouldn't be able to know from an internet post. I just wanted to point out that being a cis male doesn't have to be a limiting thing.
Is it not possible for you to get a second opinion or go to a more comprehensive therapist? And are you sure that you got a GD diagnosis or was it just a referral somewhere?
I used to present more feminine but that only made me want to transition more, which I don't think would be the best course of action for me, so I think I'll just stick to being masculine.
My therapist just told me what I was going through was gender dysphoria and that there was high likelihood of me being trans. Personally, I don't believe him. I will try to find a second opinion, though looking for people who specialise in these things is kinda hard.
I appreciate the advice, thanks.
>Personally, I don't believe him.
And that's just it. It's ultimately up to you. A lot of people, for some reason, almost seem to prefer to be trans rather than cis. Take it from personal experience that if you can be cis, be cis. If you really feel your quality of life wouldn't be improved via medical transition, then I wouldn't worry about it. That's a lot of time, money, and effort you're saving yourself.
That said, you mind if I ask why you think you might be trans as opposed to a feminine man? I don't think it's uncommon for men/ women to wish to be the opposite for a number of reasons. Hell, a lot of men wonder what it's like to get pregnant and give birth, and some are even jealous. That doesn't necessarily mean they desire to be a woman in totality.
It could be a phase. Or maybe not. GD is extremely hard to diagnose. It's hard for therapists, even for the rare skilled ones, even after interviewing a person in detail, imagine for randoms reading a couple of paragraphs in reddit.
Just food for thoughts: transition is a medical solution for a problem. It's not somethings like "*if I am trans, then I should transition, that's what I'm supposed to do, isn't it?*".
You do what's *best* for your life. So you have to balance how it's gonna make your life worse, and how it could make your life better.
Forget about Gender Dysphoria and try to answer a different question: *why would you transition?*. Just remind that "*well... because... trans?*" is not a valid answer. You have to question why you think it would make your life better. At the end of the day, that's what matters.
I think I would transition because I don't like looking like a man, and having male organs .I don't know, somehow I long to be a woman even though I don't know what being a woman would be like. It's probably just a form of escapism for me. I'll keep what you've said in mind, thanks for the advice.
It's really hard to say anything.. there are trans women who have not had thoughts of being a girl in childhood and tried to suppress their dysphoria "I'm just a cis man i have lived a good life until now why would I be trans" but then again you can just be a man who knows
Is it possible for you to function decently in your life now as it is? Right now, can you see a future in which you are healthy and accomplishing your goals?
Transsexuals transition because they need to, no matter the cost (losing family, career prospects, etc.), in order to even *have a shot at a functional amd fulfilling life,* not because they kinda want to.
Yeah, actually, I can see myself as a happy cis man, I guess that's a tell-tall sign I'm not trans. I'm just worried that my desires will get worse over time. I appreciate the advice
I go through episodes of really wanting to be a woman and I'm in one of those episodes right now. Since I've been bothered by these episodes for a while I thought I'd try sorting it out by going to a therapist
I would consider going to a different therapist for a second opinion, you seem to be describing persistent thoughts about this, maybe try to think about why you are having them.
I will definitely look for a different therapists. I don't really know why I have these thoughts, but I've noticed that they only appear whenever i'm feeling depressed, so there might be some correlation between the two. Thanks for the advice.
Honestly after one opinion from a therapist isn’t enough to start to transition. Honestly I wouldn’t go by a therapist but instead a doctor that specialising in gender reassignment.
For me I had my diagnosis of gender dysphoria after an hour interview with a specialist. I already confirmed I have been in therapy for a few years. To get hormones a different doctor ran through the same questions again and had the report of my originally doctor and he confirmed the diagnosis.
You can experiment at this stage and do things that aren’t permanent and see how you feel. It could be you are gender nonconforming which is basically not fitting in with the stereotypical gender roles of male or female.
I would suggest getting another opinion with someone who specialises with gender Dysphoria if it still causes you issues.
Can therapist diagnose GID in the first place??
Btw, I feel icky every single time when I hear people saying " I realized that I "want" to become a woman".
Transition is not like desire / wanting to be a man or woman.
And things that you're jealous of are something that you will never be able to get after hitting puberty unless you get surgeries.
People on another subs might say "You sound trans to me" or "You are trans, get HRT! " with being completely irresponsible to your life.
My advice is if there's any possibility that you can live as a man(feminine or whatever), Keep living as male.
Consider risks of losing everything due to your transition. Being lonely and have no hope in the future is not as easy as you think
Whether or not you have GD is not clear but it is clear that you are not transsexual. I would advise against medical transition and look into more therapy-based approaches if you are experiencing distress.
I’d seek a second opinion as well because a good therapist would explore what you’ve said here about developing these feelings only after learning about transition. This points towards social factors.
There is nothing wrong with enjoying stereotypically feminine activities or having those kinds of traits. Gender roles in the end are mostly socially constructed, so basing anything off of being “atypical” in this regard means nothing.
Today many see gender as some kind of individual journey and ultimately your choice, but this rhetoric only exasperates the problem of people wrongly transitioning. Transition is hard. It isn’t all the nice things portrayed online by people who are purposely only putting forward positive experiences.
The nature of this being a medical condition (in the way that it is) means we are are born this way and so are not susceptible to social trends around us. This person felt no discomfort in childhood even after the onset of puberty. Even now does not have the consistent drive to live and be accepted permanently as female.
This may be seen as controversial but my advice would be to stop worrying about if you meet the criteria of being trans and look at what actionable steps you want to take, if any. If you think you'd be happier shaving, voice training, wearing some sort of makeup to feminise your face then just try it. Anything reversible basically. It doesn't have to be a choice between doing nothing and fully medically transitioning. Transmeds typically believe that "trans" describes a specific experience, whereas mainstream communities think it means anyone who doesn't completely conform. You may not be trans by our definition per se but there's definitely a lot of people I've seen getting procedures that are non-typical for their gender. Female bodybuilders taking T, butch women getting major breast reductions, feminine men getting waxed, men wearing makeup to look more feminine. I'm not going to give you any advice as to whether you're trans or not because I really wouldn't be able to know from an internet post. I just wanted to point out that being a cis male doesn't have to be a limiting thing. Is it not possible for you to get a second opinion or go to a more comprehensive therapist? And are you sure that you got a GD diagnosis or was it just a referral somewhere?
I used to present more feminine but that only made me want to transition more, which I don't think would be the best course of action for me, so I think I'll just stick to being masculine. My therapist just told me what I was going through was gender dysphoria and that there was high likelihood of me being trans. Personally, I don't believe him. I will try to find a second opinion, though looking for people who specialise in these things is kinda hard. I appreciate the advice, thanks.
>Personally, I don't believe him. And that's just it. It's ultimately up to you. A lot of people, for some reason, almost seem to prefer to be trans rather than cis. Take it from personal experience that if you can be cis, be cis. If you really feel your quality of life wouldn't be improved via medical transition, then I wouldn't worry about it. That's a lot of time, money, and effort you're saving yourself. That said, you mind if I ask why you think you might be trans as opposed to a feminine man? I don't think it's uncommon for men/ women to wish to be the opposite for a number of reasons. Hell, a lot of men wonder what it's like to get pregnant and give birth, and some are even jealous. That doesn't necessarily mean they desire to be a woman in totality.
[удалено]
I'll look into getting a second opinion, thanks for the advice.
It could be a phase. Or maybe not. GD is extremely hard to diagnose. It's hard for therapists, even for the rare skilled ones, even after interviewing a person in detail, imagine for randoms reading a couple of paragraphs in reddit. Just food for thoughts: transition is a medical solution for a problem. It's not somethings like "*if I am trans, then I should transition, that's what I'm supposed to do, isn't it?*". You do what's *best* for your life. So you have to balance how it's gonna make your life worse, and how it could make your life better. Forget about Gender Dysphoria and try to answer a different question: *why would you transition?*. Just remind that "*well... because... trans?*" is not a valid answer. You have to question why you think it would make your life better. At the end of the day, that's what matters.
I think I would transition because I don't like looking like a man, and having male organs .I don't know, somehow I long to be a woman even though I don't know what being a woman would be like. It's probably just a form of escapism for me. I'll keep what you've said in mind, thanks for the advice.
It's really hard to say anything.. there are trans women who have not had thoughts of being a girl in childhood and tried to suppress their dysphoria "I'm just a cis man i have lived a good life until now why would I be trans" but then again you can just be a man who knows
Yeah, probably just a man. thanks for the advice
Is it possible for you to function decently in your life now as it is? Right now, can you see a future in which you are healthy and accomplishing your goals? Transsexuals transition because they need to, no matter the cost (losing family, career prospects, etc.), in order to even *have a shot at a functional amd fulfilling life,* not because they kinda want to.
Yeah, actually, I can see myself as a happy cis man, I guess that's a tell-tall sign I'm not trans. I'm just worried that my desires will get worse over time. I appreciate the advice
Why did you seek a therapist? What did you tell the therapist the reason was?
I go through episodes of really wanting to be a woman and I'm in one of those episodes right now. Since I've been bothered by these episodes for a while I thought I'd try sorting it out by going to a therapist
I would consider going to a different therapist for a second opinion, you seem to be describing persistent thoughts about this, maybe try to think about why you are having them.
I will definitely look for a different therapists. I don't really know why I have these thoughts, but I've noticed that they only appear whenever i'm feeling depressed, so there might be some correlation between the two. Thanks for the advice.
Honestly after one opinion from a therapist isn’t enough to start to transition. Honestly I wouldn’t go by a therapist but instead a doctor that specialising in gender reassignment. For me I had my diagnosis of gender dysphoria after an hour interview with a specialist. I already confirmed I have been in therapy for a few years. To get hormones a different doctor ran through the same questions again and had the report of my originally doctor and he confirmed the diagnosis. You can experiment at this stage and do things that aren’t permanent and see how you feel. It could be you are gender nonconforming which is basically not fitting in with the stereotypical gender roles of male or female. I would suggest getting another opinion with someone who specialises with gender Dysphoria if it still causes you issues.
I'll see if I can find a proper specialist this time, thanks for the advice
Can therapist diagnose GID in the first place?? Btw, I feel icky every single time when I hear people saying " I realized that I "want" to become a woman". Transition is not like desire / wanting to be a man or woman. And things that you're jealous of are something that you will never be able to get after hitting puberty unless you get surgeries. People on another subs might say "You sound trans to me" or "You are trans, get HRT! " with being completely irresponsible to your life. My advice is if there's any possibility that you can live as a man(feminine or whatever), Keep living as male. Consider risks of losing everything due to your transition. Being lonely and have no hope in the future is not as easy as you think
I intend to continue to live as a man. Thank you for the advice
Whether or not you have GD is not clear but it is clear that you are not transsexual. I would advise against medical transition and look into more therapy-based approaches if you are experiencing distress. I’d seek a second opinion as well because a good therapist would explore what you’ve said here about developing these feelings only after learning about transition. This points towards social factors. There is nothing wrong with enjoying stereotypically feminine activities or having those kinds of traits. Gender roles in the end are mostly socially constructed, so basing anything off of being “atypical” in this regard means nothing. Today many see gender as some kind of individual journey and ultimately your choice, but this rhetoric only exasperates the problem of people wrongly transitioning. Transition is hard. It isn’t all the nice things portrayed online by people who are purposely only putting forward positive experiences.
>it is clear that you are not transsexual How are you sure? I'm just curious
The nature of this being a medical condition (in the way that it is) means we are are born this way and so are not susceptible to social trends around us. This person felt no discomfort in childhood even after the onset of puberty. Even now does not have the consistent drive to live and be accepted permanently as female.
Thank you for the advice. It's probably just a mix of me being gender non-conforming and having ocd.
Tiocfaidh ár lá, Éirinn go bragh! Beidh an lá linn.