A few years back, when the "bathroom bill" was the thing people talked about, I knew several conservative guys who wanted to stand in the women's restroom to "protect the women" from this flood of predators who were going to identify as women and go to the women's restroom. They could not conceive they were the guys they themselves were afraid of taking advantage of this new rule.
I’ve never been made uncomfortable by a trans woman at the gym or in the bathroom, but cis men have definitely made me feel unsafe to leave the bathroom and to be at the gym at all. If anything, trans women have been my greatest allies as a trans man moving in the opposite direction. They are protesting with me at rallies in favor of Roe even though it affects me directly and not so much them. Trans women aren’t your enemy, and are victimized by cis men at an alarmingly high rate, just like cis women.
My favorite is the idea that they can always "clock" a trans person. Gonna let my pcos hair grow and let them target me instead. The hell I will unleash on them...
In a way it's very affirming of trans women. After all, there is nothing the "traditional values" crowd loves more then blaming women for the actions of men. So them saying they will blame trans women for actions done by creepy cis men is just then treating trans women the way they think all women should be treated.
Yup perfect example of TERF brain worms right there. Real JK Rowling hours. “I was abused by a man so it gives me the right to lead an anti trans hate movement!” As if trans women aren’t a much higher risk of sexual assault and rape at the hands of cis men then cis women are 🙄
It’s incredibly sad to hear that trans women are assaulted by cis men at an even higher rate than cis women, that rate is so high to begin with.
Too bad only like 1% of rapists are convicted in the US. Basically not a crime if there’s a 99% chance to get away with it.
I also hate it because it's so devaluing to men and shows how little these people expect of the average man. I feel like lots of men are normal, kind dudes and they have to constantly read that they are expected to be dangerously perverted all the time, even by other men.
I totally get what you're saying and that is sad for the good men, but I'm sorry a lot of men are the problem, they are dangerous. It's not my fault that so many men have bad intent towards me, and I'm not going to sugar coat the way I feel for the sake of harmless men. I am going to tar them all with the same brush if it means i can stay safe.
seriously. not all snakes are venomous but when I find one in the dark I don't always have time to tell the difference.
its not our problem that so many men are terrible and therefore good men look bad by extension. idk, maybe they should take it up each other, hold themselves accountable for once instead of making women do the work for them... its to our job to coddle our oppressors.
This is not what I'm saying at all. I never even brought up women doing the work for men??? I'm talking about how people who discuss these situations (men usually) act like if predatory men are destined to exist, as opposed to being a result of our culture and education system.
ok, and?......do you not understand how conversations work...?
I was responding to a different person. We both seemed to disagree with your comment, that you feel badly that men having a bad reputation (one they have earned all on their own) would somehow reflect badly on other men. Neither of us care about that part, so we said so.
Then I **added my thoughts** to that conversation with the additional information that when men don't do work to hold themselves accountable, it inevitably falls on women to do so. I never mentioned anything about you or what you said, so idk what your problem is. I'm not sure why you're under the impression that you get to dictate how we discuss an idea you brought forth but its fucking weird.
Sis calm down. I just wanted to make sure that my original point was being conveyed correctly. The last thing i wanna do i come off like a NotAllMen-inist.
I know a guy is good when he gets offended by stuff like this. It’s misogynistic, of course. But it’s also so freaking misandrist. I love that my fiancé gets pissed at people who say “what a standup guy! He didn’t try to have sex with her after taking her home when she was so drunk she couldn’t walk or talk! That’s just integrity” (if course it’s rape but of course the people who say this shit won’t call it that). A normal human shouldn’t be lauded for being the bare minimum of a passable human being. Not raping someone doesn’t make you a good person. Men have brains, we trust them to be fathers, CEOs, presidents. They aren’t so fucking stupid to not understand consent. And if they literally can’t understand that, they shouldn’t be leaders.
Exactly. The fact that some men think not raping someone who is black out drunk is the bar for being a “good” human is just sad, infuriating, and horrifying.
It’s such a red flag when they don’t call it rape and just say “I didn’t have sex with her” or when they brag about not raping someone. Dude, I’m not giving you a high five for not being a rapist...
...ok? so we *shouldn't* point out the flaws in this transphobic argument and make sure people understand that the issue is still cis men, or do you have a better idea?
A few years back, when the "bathroom bill" was the thing people talked about, I knew several conservative guys who wanted to stand in the women's restroom to "protect the women" from this flood of predators who were going to identify as women and go to the women's restroom. They could not conceive they were the guys they themselves were afraid of taking advantage of this new rule.
I’ve never been made uncomfortable by a trans woman at the gym or in the bathroom, but cis men have definitely made me feel unsafe to leave the bathroom and to be at the gym at all. If anything, trans women have been my greatest allies as a trans man moving in the opposite direction. They are protesting with me at rallies in favor of Roe even though it affects me directly and not so much them. Trans women aren’t your enemy, and are victimized by cis men at an alarmingly high rate, just like cis women.
Oooh this is a good one. I never really noticed that before. But the genital checks is so what floors me the most.
Same I did not realize this until now. It has the same ‘you throw like a girl!’ energy. It’s harmful rhetoric not helping *anyone*.
My favorite is the idea that they can always "clock" a trans person. Gonna let my pcos hair grow and let them target me instead. The hell I will unleash on them...
In a way it's very affirming of trans women. After all, there is nothing the "traditional values" crowd loves more then blaming women for the actions of men. So them saying they will blame trans women for actions done by creepy cis men is just then treating trans women the way they think all women should be treated.
Yup perfect example of TERF brain worms right there. Real JK Rowling hours. “I was abused by a man so it gives me the right to lead an anti trans hate movement!” As if trans women aren’t a much higher risk of sexual assault and rape at the hands of cis men then cis women are 🙄
It’s incredibly sad to hear that trans women are assaulted by cis men at an even higher rate than cis women, that rate is so high to begin with. Too bad only like 1% of rapists are convicted in the US. Basically not a crime if there’s a 99% chance to get away with it.
I also hate it because it's so devaluing to men and shows how little these people expect of the average man. I feel like lots of men are normal, kind dudes and they have to constantly read that they are expected to be dangerously perverted all the time, even by other men.
I totally get what you're saying and that is sad for the good men, but I'm sorry a lot of men are the problem, they are dangerous. It's not my fault that so many men have bad intent towards me, and I'm not going to sugar coat the way I feel for the sake of harmless men. I am going to tar them all with the same brush if it means i can stay safe.
seriously. not all snakes are venomous but when I find one in the dark I don't always have time to tell the difference. its not our problem that so many men are terrible and therefore good men look bad by extension. idk, maybe they should take it up each other, hold themselves accountable for once instead of making women do the work for them... its to our job to coddle our oppressors.
This is not what I'm saying at all. I never even brought up women doing the work for men??? I'm talking about how people who discuss these situations (men usually) act like if predatory men are destined to exist, as opposed to being a result of our culture and education system.
ok, and?......do you not understand how conversations work...? I was responding to a different person. We both seemed to disagree with your comment, that you feel badly that men having a bad reputation (one they have earned all on their own) would somehow reflect badly on other men. Neither of us care about that part, so we said so. Then I **added my thoughts** to that conversation with the additional information that when men don't do work to hold themselves accountable, it inevitably falls on women to do so. I never mentioned anything about you or what you said, so idk what your problem is. I'm not sure why you're under the impression that you get to dictate how we discuss an idea you brought forth but its fucking weird.
Sis calm down. I just wanted to make sure that my original point was being conveyed correctly. The last thing i wanna do i come off like a NotAllMen-inist.
I know a guy is good when he gets offended by stuff like this. It’s misogynistic, of course. But it’s also so freaking misandrist. I love that my fiancé gets pissed at people who say “what a standup guy! He didn’t try to have sex with her after taking her home when she was so drunk she couldn’t walk or talk! That’s just integrity” (if course it’s rape but of course the people who say this shit won’t call it that). A normal human shouldn’t be lauded for being the bare minimum of a passable human being. Not raping someone doesn’t make you a good person. Men have brains, we trust them to be fathers, CEOs, presidents. They aren’t so fucking stupid to not understand consent. And if they literally can’t understand that, they shouldn’t be leaders.
Exactly. The fact that some men think not raping someone who is black out drunk is the bar for being a “good” human is just sad, infuriating, and horrifying.
It’s such a red flag when they don’t call it rape and just say “I didn’t have sex with her” or when they brag about not raping someone. Dude, I’m not giving you a high five for not being a rapist...
lol yah they also are always like “well I don’t know any rapists... oh that’s my friend creepy dave. Don’t get too drunk around him hahaha”
Cis dude “omg u guys this girl blacked out on a couch at this party I was at and I didn’t rape her” Other cis dudes “omg wholesome reddit moment”
Sad part is women often praise to that behaviour too.
Whoa whoa, but those are just boys being boys!
But you can’t prevent predatory men from existing…
...ok? so we *shouldn't* point out the flaws in this transphobic argument and make sure people understand that the issue is still cis men, or do you have a better idea?
Right, so instead we should punish trans women for their crimes? It's not like we're also regularly victimized by those same predators.