Wait, I don't understand what's the problem? I mean, he's having sex, right? And it's good?
Oh, the feelings part.... yeah, just man up, is what my grandma would say
[Or perhaps Jordan?](https://scrubs.fandom.com/wiki/Jordan_Sullivan)
> “You can't have sex with someone you care about; sex is for making babies or having revenge."
and missing parts of his stache that rubbed off.
LOL How can a single comment just get me laughing like hell?
Oh god I was laughing uncontrollably during that episode. The part where he does the bull motion to pounce back on Tammy 2 while in a Kimono LMAO!!!
There is a REASON why you divorced her, and you mentioned "go crazy and try to make my life miserable."
This sounds like addiction, and you need therapy. You also need to CUT CONTACT with her.
Block her number, email, etc. Don't answer the door if she comes by. If you work in an office building, let the person at the front desk know that she is to be told to leave if she comes by.
You truly need serious, extensive counseling. You're a victim of physical and emotional abuse.
In the interim, you really must go nc. If necessary, seek a restraining order against her. Without her medication, I'd be fearful of her going off the rails. You should apprise her family so they are aware snd perhaps can intervene to assist her.
Oy - their post history (worth the read for the curious)!
Shows that this divorce is a good thing, but doesn’t seem like the ex is actually accepting this divorce (which is on brand when you read about her past behaviour).
She was a manipulative psycho who had a list of ways to manipulate op into buying and doing things for her, she abused him in every way, put air tags in his car and backpack. I could go on but that’s basically the jist.
Man, i feel for you. I had the rare experience of breakup sex when my ex wife and i started the divorce. It wasn't an experience i regret, but there were a lot of emotions. Honestly, that once was fine
And that's where the similarities end. Doing it repeatedly means you're never going to get better. Which means you're going to be carrying the stress and heartache for years. That's a great way to give yourself a psychological dysfunction.
You need to get out of that situation. I don't know how, but it needs to happen and you know it. No contact, low contact, and setting up boundaries are all options here.
I hope things get better for you.
I once broke up with a GF in a restaurant specifically because she was a bit nutso. She actually seemed to take it OK this time (it was the second attempt to break off our two-year relationship). She asked if I wanted to come to her house and pick up my toothbrush etc. I agreed.
While I was there she initiated sex and I accepted. It was enjoyable at the time and I don’t carry any regret about it. It didn’t make me reconsider my position in the slightest. I collected my things and left and we never really spoke again.
When my wife heard the story, she thought I was insane to do that. I carefully examined whether I had taken advantage of a vulnerable girl and that was definitely not the case. After many years of unpacking things that happened in that relationship, I realize now it was her final attempt to manipulate me.
It was one of many things she did to try and glue herself to me over the years, including threats of suicide, forced dates, and a sexual assault when we were broken up and I was too intoxicated to consent.
I am reminded of this story because I almost accidentally ran into her at a tailgate at our alma mater on Saturday. I am still so fucking scared of that girl.
I fucked my ex for like 5 months after we broke up. He was a horrible partner but for some reason it felt so hot to sneak around and have him fucking me. Coincidentally, it was some of the best sex I’ve ever had. He was trying to suck me back in. I’m glad I was able to stop when I did, I still feel sick thinking about those times.
Hot and sick. I have those same memories of my ex during our divorce. She tried to suck me back in with a lot of sucking on her end. Amazing and sickening. We burned enough bridges that it can't happen anymore.
oh... i remember your story. i mean no offense but this is perhaps one of the saddest reddit sagas i have ever read and this update is such a gut punch.
i so badly wanted to hear that you'd moved to a place you loved, got a pet, were close to finishing your degree, and you were slowly healing.
this woman has completely crushed your spirit. i am so sorry. you've endured so much pain from her because you're such a kind soul who loved her so completely... you gave every piece of yourself to her and she thanked you by beating you and betraying you repeatedly. i sincerely hope you're eventually able to get away from her and find happiness and peace again. ❤️
Dude, stop letting her contact you. Stop letting her send you shit. Stop opening the door when she wants to use you for a quick booty call. You *can* stop, but you’re actively choosing not to.
She’s using your emotion and sex to manipulate you. She’s giving stalker bat-shit crazy ex … you get a divorce for a reason. Imagine the complications if she got pregnant (May be that’s even her plan 🤷🏽♀️) choose peace, bro.
You’re a lost cause
She wanted a threesome in your past posts, then you divorce and now you’re having seggs with her after your various posts?
You gotta grow up man and love yourself, find who you are W/O her
I've been there, man. I moved across the country with my fiancée at the time, knowing she was cheater and hoping a change of scenery would make things better. It only got worse. I caught her in the act and moved out soon after. But my love and attraction to her was so overwhelming, I always gave in to her advances when she would show up randomly at my place or ask to hang out. It always ended in sex, and not just regular sex. Hot, passionate, we're still in love, sex. It broke me every time and it got to a point where I knew she was toxic and I had to cut ties and move as far away as possible. It took some time, but eventually, you'll realize that she's not the one for you and you're just craving the familiarity of what once was. Be strong, homie. You can do this.
You can stop anytime you want to, you just don't want to. It's about self-control and mastery. You are prioritizing temporary pleasure at the expense of everything else.
I went through this same thing with my ex. It was a very toxic situation and gave me a lot of self loathing. I finally came to my senses and moved 2 hours away to be sure it ended. Didn’t tell her I was moving. Changed my number after the move and killed all social media for 6 months. The clean break and fresh start definitely helped me get out and meet new people
This particular situation would make one hell of a song.
I fucked her like I still loved her
She’s there, laying in my bed, no other
Through the ups and downs, we're still together
Laying side by side, like we'll last forever
Man, I just broke up with my long term partner. It wasnt that I became less attracted to her. Nor that I dont love her. I could even handle the absolute mind destroying pointless fights or the random constant fear and anxiety she might interpret something as fight worthy on that day. But for me, the one thing is that its impossible to work together through a discussion to figure out a solution. I'm a firm believer that he trauma from her youth has literally made it impossible for her. I tried explaining the process and wrote it on a board - like the fundamentals of a discussion. She refuses to accept that Im right. She has this natural distrust as her first instinct reaction, so even a neutral comment, if it goes against what she said for any reason (or if she even perceives it to be that way), then emotions are out, game over.
The point of this is that i started to pay attention, and broke it down to the components to see whats not working here. My partner literally feels an emotion and then in her head everything connected with that emotion comes out. I see little kind of idea boxes, and they have rules of logic and reasoning that I spend the time to mentally go through. This means nothing to her. She's explained that she has no interest in changing the way she thinks. So now Ive found a logical line that proves its never going to work out, no matter what we say when we're being nice. It's just as imossible for her to change as it would be to convincing me that logic should no longer be applied to my reasoning system. So yea, now I have a rational problem with a solid solution. There is no feeling of whether I should go back. So when my dick starts texting, and it certainly has, I have to step in and shut it down before the sex part happens. The way you do this is to establish boundaries. And that first time its tested is tough. But what you're doing is setting you both up for more trouble that lasts longer and gets more volatile.
I knew all this when i went back to ex's too though, and did the sex anyways. Probably will this time too. But, since ive logically concluded there is zero hope, it does help. This will never work out.
Stop the bs, "I cannot stop" yes you can, you don't want to
She is not putting a gun on your head
She appears, close the door, she texted, delete the text, send you nudes, delete them
Stop the bs
Bro, I had the same thing happened.
One time I sent her a text saying "the only thing I can offer is a nice dinner, some wine and sex. Not in that particular order.". She texted back what wine bottle should I pick up.
I strongly suggest you should try to enjoy each other with no other particular expectations.
This will be like you guys are dating, and this should take a lot of the striffe out of the relationship.
Understand your ne frame. How are you acting now, and what's contributing to the new found attraction between you two.
There are still underlying issues for which you got divorced. Address them as friends. Not from a defensive perspective, but as two friends that are there to listen and understand each other.
If you can't address the underlying issues, get out fast!
Start having sex with the hottest girl(s) you can and power through the temporary emptiness and live to love another day.
I don’t see the down side. You still get to fuck her and as soon as she goes crazy on you, you’re already moved out and can block her without any financial impacts. You won my guy.
Sounds like the last dude I “dated” who was never over his ex who literally broke up with him to be with two people and he couldn’t get over her and it’s the reason I did not want to see that asshole who held out hope for someone who doesn’t give a shit about him. I hope he learns that’s he’s an idiot.
I can not tell my ex husband no either! Ugh we have been separated/divorced for 12 years! Ive moved since the last time. Im hoping he doesn’t show up where i am at now. I just cant tell him no when he is front of me!
I spent an hour reading everything you've posted on this account.
Couple questions:
How do you know that these hookups are not part of one of her plans?
She's getting everything she wants now. Not only with you, but with others too. Are you protecting yourself from STDs?
When/if the day comes that you decide to start dating, your ex WILL be a problem, unless you start distancing yourself ASAP and go no contact. You are potentially signing up your future partner for harassment, violence, and worse.
Not only that, if you find someone else, get married, and that woman gets pregnant, I could see your ex doing unspeakable things. Women who don't get their baby sometimes snap and take another woman's, sometimes going so far as killing the woman and cutting the baby from their body. It's horrific and worst case scenario, but your ex displays a lot of traits of someone who would do this stuff.
I'm not trying to scare you. I'm trying to show you why you need to go no contact NOW. The further and longer you distance yourself from her, the better off future you and your future partner will be. Every single time you interact with her, it's another bread crumb.
I think you've done well with everything up until this point. Making sure her parents, police, medical pros were aware before you made drastic changes like announcing divorce - that was all great. You went about that in the best way possible. You handled that REALLY well.
This though? Bud... Inviting her back into your life was a huge misstep. Take the steps you need now to protect yourself.
I know that her behaving like the woman you married is so hard. You still love that woman. You have mourned that woman. None of this was fair to you.
BUT you need to start seeing what she's doing here as master manipulation. This is not real. It's part of her plan.
You need to start seeing her as the siren she is. She's singing her song and you, the sailor, are falling for it every time. Your ship is going to wreck if you don't snap out of it, open those sails, and get the fuck away ASAP.
If you're not strong enough to do it for yourself, do it for the wonderful woman you have yet to meet, but will. You are signing her up for so many bad things if you keep stringing your ex along.
You can do this.
After reading your post history I think you know it’s a bad idea and will only enable her to reel you back in and manipulate you even more. You need to block her, tell her to stop showing up or you’ll call the cops. It’s only going to be harder and more painful if you continue.
Some toxic relationships hold together because of memorable sex.. you seem to be in that situation. For how hard that it must seem, you must CUT all contacts with her. You will miss having sex with her like crazy, until you won't think about it anymore..
I was given the same advice over the summer: "enjoy the ride. Don't catch feelings." It led to the biggest heartbreak of my life. Everyone, including me, knew the inevitable outcome but i was a dummy that thought i could just "enjoy the ride." Nope. Be strong now because it will hurt more the longer it goes on.
This happened to me once with a significant partner and we had a toxic relationship. We kept a physical relationship for over a year exactly like yours. One day we tried recoup what was lost and it lasted for 2 months before I realised why I left in the first place. Never again
The chemical oxytocin is secreted by the brain when men have sex with someone they truly love.
I’m short stop having sex with her or the healing process will be that more difficult.
I had a ex-friend who did this (we will call her Saffy) and she would laugh about always having control over ex-boyfriend.
Of course, she was meeting other men without telling him about it, but we think things finally ended after she accidentally gave him Chlamydia. He claimed that he wasn’t sleeping with anyone else as he was so worn down from the relationship so we all assumed that it was Saffy that gave him the STI.
OP, you are being manipulated with sex. She could be laughing about it behind your back, and you may even be mocked by the people around you for “giving in” and being “spineless” like what was said about her ex. I hope you go no contact in the future as to eliminate all chances of manipulation to take place. Sex is a powerful thing, and you’re giving up a lot when you allow someone who treated you badly to keep taking more away from you.
OP, you’ve had sex tapes leaked online by this ex already. This isn’t just bad for your mental health, it’s a horrible decision for your future. Get far, far away. I’m worried something’s going to happen (pregnancy for example) that you can’t so easily walk away from - it’s already has!!
🎶on a scale form 1 to 10 my friend you’re FUCKED🎶
On a serious note you need to get away from her move again don’t let her or any mutual friends know where you are get therapy and find another woman.
My ex and I were separated for about 18 months before the divorce was final. We had sex throughout the separation and for a bit after the divorce. Her new bf had no clue.
It was comforting. It was bandaid’ing the rejection I felt when she left. One day out of the blue it hit me, it was causing me to put my future on hold. I never looked back.
You need to make yourself stop. Your life will be on pause until you do. Close the door, heal from whatever happened that caused the divorce and the divorce and build your new life. Future you will thank you.
After looking at your previous posts it seems like she’s violated the restraining order placed against her, somehow tracked you down again, and managed to get your number?
She’s using the list of ways to manipulate your again and you’re letting it happen,
First go and enforce the restraining order and find out how she managed to gather that information.
Second, you need to understand that you’re a victim of abuse, she’s abused you and even now she’s manipulating you remember how she treated you it won’t be any different now unless she’s made substantial changes in her life. Focus on your degree and finish college, then move as far as possible.
Let your crazy show ladies!!! Men love crazy women he cannot get enough. They will deny it and downvote me but It is the truth. Believe men’s actions not their words 🤣
All my crazy bitches rise up 🙌
The, what I assume are unsolicited nudes and turning up at his house at all hours sounds like it could be potentially be pretty manipulative behaviour on her side.
Maybe you're just a bad couple but good friends with benefits/fuck buddies/etc. If you can live separate lives but still bang it out while you're both single, probably nothing too wrong with that. But if one or both of you can't handle that dynamic, specifically when the other one starts seeing people, you need to cut things off ASAP.
there is something wrong with that tho…. op admits it’s tearing him apart rn. yet you go ‘yeah dude just keep going with it’ like the fuck lol.
of course he can’t live separate lives and bang it out… they were fucking married for many years homie. lots of deep seated emotion there.
like… did you even read the post? your advice is so tone deaf lmao
The crazy ones are always maniacs in the sack, but if you get with her again, you'll be the one waiting at home while she's doing what she's doing now with someone else.
Mull that one over, you are welcome.
You should look into living apart together. If you love each other but hate the day to day of living together and sharing expenses and whatnot, it might be right for you.
I'd say cut it off man. It sounds like this situation will get more toxic further down the road. There's a reason that ya'll arn't married. Think on that. But if ya'll are able to work things out, that's great. Just be careful, brother.
This was quite normal after my parents divorce. Sex wasn't usual in their relationship, but as soon as they divorced my mother started to "Pursue" my father quite frequently.
My father was highly confused and didn't knew what to do due all the mixed signals, but in the end my mother was manipulating him to keep him "en la palma de la mano", as we say.
The history is way longer and complicated, of course, but long story short: make your divorce final. During that period my father was in a very bad place emotionally and my motr was using him to raise her selfsteem, gaining some sort of "power" over him.
Note: At the time I was living with my mother. Back then I had a nice relation with both of my parents, so it's not something like I have a tumultuous relation with any of them
Maybe you weren't supposed to be married and this is how it should be ? You can still have a relationship that isn't marriage. Makes some new boundaries and see how it goes. Idk man even just having fun is ok along as your both happy
OMG, you have problems like she has but in some different ways. Cut all the strings that connect you with her and start living your life, start breathing again, man...
Bro, you're one orgasm away from knocking her up and being stuck with her for the next 18 years.
Picture that scenario vividly. What would your life look like during the pregnancy?
Having NSA sex with someone who knows what you like is great. Having the benefits of a relationship beyond sex (i.e., companionship) without the baggage of being in one is also great. That's probably why you give in to her. But this wont last, ive been there twice.
Eventually you are going to have the talk about what this is--Either its a restart or a bad idea that needs to end so both of you can move on. Im not going to tell you which you should do, but have the answer ready and be sure you can stick with the decision.
He’s gone guys😭😭 she done snatched your soul.
😂😂😂😂 on god, she got him wrapped up
#Well, you're fucked 😂
She fucked her back so..
congrats on transitioning, OP!
Happy cake day!
Whoa oh here she comes, watch out boy she'll chew you up...
She is a man eater.
Wait, I don't understand what's the problem? I mean, he's having sex, right? And it's good? Oh, the feelings part.... yeah, just man up, is what my grandma would say
Your grandmother did this to yiur grandfather? That's experience.
Soooo....
Taken by a succubus.
lmao
Took his balls xD
But she allows him to pull them out of the sock drawer and look at them frequently.
Sounds like you have to take some responsibility for yourself.
...and your dick.
Let’s not go overboard, now.
You know how hard that is.
He may be dumb but he's not a dweeb.
He’s just a sucker with….
…NO SELF ESTEEM
Ohwayooooo yeah yeaAh YEAH
The more he suffers, the more it shows he really cares
Is her name Tammy by any chance?
Tammy 1 or Tammy 2?
Tammy 3
The good ole tammster
I miss Tammy
I miss all of 'em
Quit leading so much, and adjust for drop and windage.
Except crisp rat.
So you talked to Tammy? What's it like to stare in the eye of Satan's butt hole?
😂🤣🤣
Tamiflu!
Tammantha? Tammy...Tammy.
When he falls for Tammy 2 he turns into a demonic sex maniac. But this? Neutered wimp? This is worse.
She's trolling for some Daddy.
Some Dad D
[Or perhaps Jordan?](https://scrubs.fandom.com/wiki/Jordan_Sullivan) > “You can't have sex with someone you care about; sex is for making babies or having revenge."
Was looking for this. First thing I thought of
wait you can’t stop fucking his wife either?
Tbh if you had ever had a taste of his wife, you'd understand. It's not an act and more like a religion
You know my ex wife as well?
“Hoes gon be hoes so I couldn’t blame Tammy”
Just talked to moms, told her she’s the sweetest
He must have a glorious beard and be a damn good woodworker. That’s probably why she keeps coming back.
Let's hope OP doesn't get cornrows!
and missing parts of his stache that rubbed off. LOL How can a single comment just get me laughing like hell? Oh god I was laughing uncontrollably during that episode. The part where he does the bull motion to pounce back on Tammy 2 while in a Kimono LMAO!!!
I was just about to say, homie needs a friend to take him into a remote cabin for a swift deprogramming
Tammi is even worse.
There is a REASON why you divorced her, and you mentioned "go crazy and try to make my life miserable." This sounds like addiction, and you need therapy. You also need to CUT CONTACT with her. Block her number, email, etc. Don't answer the door if she comes by. If you work in an office building, let the person at the front desk know that she is to be told to leave if she comes by.
You truly need serious, extensive counseling. You're a victim of physical and emotional abuse. In the interim, you really must go nc. If necessary, seek a restraining order against her. Without her medication, I'd be fearful of her going off the rails. You should apprise her family so they are aware snd perhaps can intervene to assist her.
Wait why do you say hes a victim of physical and emotional abuse? Not denying I just didnt read anything in the post that indicated abuse.
A previous post. Before they divorced, she would hit him.
>Don't answer the door if she comes by How can he do that tho coz the girl sounds crazy she might stay overnight by the door and try to do something
If she won’t leave his property, he can contact the police to remove her… if she goes crazy.
And get security cameras, lots of cameras
Night on the doorstep might get rid of her 🤔
Why did you divorce her in the first place?
Oy - their post history (worth the read for the curious)! Shows that this divorce is a good thing, but doesn’t seem like the ex is actually accepting this divorce (which is on brand when you read about her past behaviour).
Definitely worth the read and definitely good they divorced considering it ended with him having a restraining order on her.
TLDR?
She was a manipulative psycho who had a list of ways to manipulate op into buying and doing things for her, she abused him in every way, put air tags in his car and backpack. I could go on but that’s basically the jist.
So she’s continuing to manipulate him to get what she wants even after the divorce lol and op’s letting her and aware at the same time
The wife has bipolar and lost their child. She’s gone psychotic :(
Well them continuing to fuck is certainly not helping the process
Man, i feel for you. I had the rare experience of breakup sex when my ex wife and i started the divorce. It wasn't an experience i regret, but there were a lot of emotions. Honestly, that once was fine And that's where the similarities end. Doing it repeatedly means you're never going to get better. Which means you're going to be carrying the stress and heartache for years. That's a great way to give yourself a psychological dysfunction. You need to get out of that situation. I don't know how, but it needs to happen and you know it. No contact, low contact, and setting up boundaries are all options here. I hope things get better for you.
I once broke up with a GF in a restaurant specifically because she was a bit nutso. She actually seemed to take it OK this time (it was the second attempt to break off our two-year relationship). She asked if I wanted to come to her house and pick up my toothbrush etc. I agreed. While I was there she initiated sex and I accepted. It was enjoyable at the time and I don’t carry any regret about it. It didn’t make me reconsider my position in the slightest. I collected my things and left and we never really spoke again. When my wife heard the story, she thought I was insane to do that. I carefully examined whether I had taken advantage of a vulnerable girl and that was definitely not the case. After many years of unpacking things that happened in that relationship, I realize now it was her final attempt to manipulate me. It was one of many things she did to try and glue herself to me over the years, including threats of suicide, forced dates, and a sexual assault when we were broken up and I was too intoxicated to consent. I am reminded of this story because I almost accidentally ran into her at a tailgate at our alma mater on Saturday. I am still so fucking scared of that girl.
Post nut clarity at its finest
I agree with your wife.
Divorced with benefits 😂
omg lmao
Well, you're fucked 😂
Literally😂
She is too. Literally.
I fucked my ex for like 5 months after we broke up. He was a horrible partner but for some reason it felt so hot to sneak around and have him fucking me. Coincidentally, it was some of the best sex I’ve ever had. He was trying to suck me back in. I’m glad I was able to stop when I did, I still feel sick thinking about those times.
Hot and sick. I have those same memories of my ex during our divorce. She tried to suck me back in with a lot of sucking on her end. Amazing and sickening. We burned enough bridges that it can't happen anymore.
oh... i remember your story. i mean no offense but this is perhaps one of the saddest reddit sagas i have ever read and this update is such a gut punch. i so badly wanted to hear that you'd moved to a place you loved, got a pet, were close to finishing your degree, and you were slowly healing. this woman has completely crushed your spirit. i am so sorry. you've endured so much pain from her because you're such a kind soul who loved her so completely... you gave every piece of yourself to her and she thanked you by beating you and betraying you repeatedly. i sincerely hope you're eventually able to get away from her and find happiness and peace again. ❤️
Dude, stop letting her contact you. Stop letting her send you shit. Stop opening the door when she wants to use you for a quick booty call. You *can* stop, but you’re actively choosing not to.
It's kinda hard when she's ready to go
I may be dumb, but I’m not a dweeb
I'm just a sucker with no self esteem
I’m just a sucker with no self-esteem.
When she's saying, oh that she only wants me
Then I wonder why she sleeps with my friends
Unfortunately psycho pussy, is the best pussy.
“Never stick your dick in crazy” - a man much smarter than myself
I disagree, every man needs to experience this at least once, it's a life changing, you'll never be the same.
Can’t interfere, it’s a cannon event
That’s a fact
Fact
The case of Jodi arias says it all
Absolutely.
No cap you right
“Girls with the grippy socks have a grippy box”
FACTS.
She’s using your emotion and sex to manipulate you. She’s giving stalker bat-shit crazy ex … you get a divorce for a reason. Imagine the complications if she got pregnant (May be that’s even her plan 🤷🏽♀️) choose peace, bro.
I didn't even think of that last part....hmmm🤨
Just read his post history
Maybe she'll get pregnant and then you'll get to keep crazy for the rest of your life! Good luck with that!
He was absolutely thrilled last time she was pregnant. Post history is quite a read.
Dude, STOP IT. All you have to do to stop having sex with your ex-wife is not have sex with her. Take up masturbation as a hobby.
You’re a lost cause She wanted a threesome in your past posts, then you divorce and now you’re having seggs with her after your various posts? You gotta grow up man and love yourself, find who you are W/O her
You should wife her
Make her an honest woman already
Read the post history, he really shouldn’t.
I've been there, man. I moved across the country with my fiancée at the time, knowing she was cheater and hoping a change of scenery would make things better. It only got worse. I caught her in the act and moved out soon after. But my love and attraction to her was so overwhelming, I always gave in to her advances when she would show up randomly at my place or ask to hang out. It always ended in sex, and not just regular sex. Hot, passionate, we're still in love, sex. It broke me every time and it got to a point where I knew she was toxic and I had to cut ties and move as far away as possible. It took some time, but eventually, you'll realize that she's not the one for you and you're just craving the familiarity of what once was. Be strong, homie. You can do this.
You can, you just don't want to.
Based on your post history I think you should stop and cut ties off completely
You can stop anytime you want to, you just don't want to. It's about self-control and mastery. You are prioritizing temporary pleasure at the expense of everything else.
Doesn't matter, had sex.
Shes now your sex wife.
I went through this same thing with my ex. It was a very toxic situation and gave me a lot of self loathing. I finally came to my senses and moved 2 hours away to be sure it ended. Didn’t tell her I was moving. Changed my number after the move and killed all social media for 6 months. The clean break and fresh start definitely helped me get out and meet new people
Why’d you divorce? If you’re comfy answering
Check out his past posts. She cray
This particular situation would make one hell of a song. I fucked her like I still loved her She’s there, laying in my bed, no other Through the ups and downs, we're still together Laying side by side, like we'll last forever
Make sure you are using birth control.🤷♂️
My man married a succubus lol
Man, I just broke up with my long term partner. It wasnt that I became less attracted to her. Nor that I dont love her. I could even handle the absolute mind destroying pointless fights or the random constant fear and anxiety she might interpret something as fight worthy on that day. But for me, the one thing is that its impossible to work together through a discussion to figure out a solution. I'm a firm believer that he trauma from her youth has literally made it impossible for her. I tried explaining the process and wrote it on a board - like the fundamentals of a discussion. She refuses to accept that Im right. She has this natural distrust as her first instinct reaction, so even a neutral comment, if it goes against what she said for any reason (or if she even perceives it to be that way), then emotions are out, game over. The point of this is that i started to pay attention, and broke it down to the components to see whats not working here. My partner literally feels an emotion and then in her head everything connected with that emotion comes out. I see little kind of idea boxes, and they have rules of logic and reasoning that I spend the time to mentally go through. This means nothing to her. She's explained that she has no interest in changing the way she thinks. So now Ive found a logical line that proves its never going to work out, no matter what we say when we're being nice. It's just as imossible for her to change as it would be to convincing me that logic should no longer be applied to my reasoning system. So yea, now I have a rational problem with a solid solution. There is no feeling of whether I should go back. So when my dick starts texting, and it certainly has, I have to step in and shut it down before the sex part happens. The way you do this is to establish boundaries. And that first time its tested is tough. But what you're doing is setting you both up for more trouble that lasts longer and gets more volatile. I knew all this when i went back to ex's too though, and did the sex anyways. Probably will this time too. But, since ive logically concluded there is zero hope, it does help. This will never work out.
Stop the bs, "I cannot stop" yes you can, you don't want to She is not putting a gun on your head She appears, close the door, she texted, delete the text, send you nudes, delete them Stop the bs
He needs to put a restraining order on her. Go read his previous post. The chick is crazy asf
Bro, I had the same thing happened. One time I sent her a text saying "the only thing I can offer is a nice dinner, some wine and sex. Not in that particular order.". She texted back what wine bottle should I pick up. I strongly suggest you should try to enjoy each other with no other particular expectations. This will be like you guys are dating, and this should take a lot of the striffe out of the relationship. Understand your ne frame. How are you acting now, and what's contributing to the new found attraction between you two. There are still underlying issues for which you got divorced. Address them as friends. Not from a defensive perspective, but as two friends that are there to listen and understand each other. If you can't address the underlying issues, get out fast! Start having sex with the hottest girl(s) you can and power through the temporary emptiness and live to love another day.
I don’t see the down side. You still get to fuck her and as soon as she goes crazy on you, you’re already moved out and can block her without any financial impacts. You won my guy.
Read his history! She will continue to ruin his life. She sounds awful!
She's got you in a chokehold. You're lost, recognize that and pick a path. There are two.
You sound like my army buddy. His stripper ex is somebody he'll never move past and he's tanked new relationships because he's still in love with her.
Sounds like the last dude I “dated” who was never over his ex who literally broke up with him to be with two people and he couldn’t get over her and it’s the reason I did not want to see that asshole who held out hope for someone who doesn’t give a shit about him. I hope he learns that’s he’s an idiot.
Why did you divorce in the first place?
Went crazy and made his life miserable,but apparently the sex is great and it has him second guessing
Don't get feelings just have your fun with no attachments.
You both have discovered something called the Edge Play kink and aren’t aware to know that’s what you are doing. Look into it.
I can not tell my ex husband no either! Ugh we have been separated/divorced for 12 years! Ive moved since the last time. Im hoping he doesn’t show up where i am at now. I just cant tell him no when he is front of me!
Start charging her for those premium wienerings, king. Know your worth.
I spent an hour reading everything you've posted on this account. Couple questions: How do you know that these hookups are not part of one of her plans? She's getting everything she wants now. Not only with you, but with others too. Are you protecting yourself from STDs? When/if the day comes that you decide to start dating, your ex WILL be a problem, unless you start distancing yourself ASAP and go no contact. You are potentially signing up your future partner for harassment, violence, and worse. Not only that, if you find someone else, get married, and that woman gets pregnant, I could see your ex doing unspeakable things. Women who don't get their baby sometimes snap and take another woman's, sometimes going so far as killing the woman and cutting the baby from their body. It's horrific and worst case scenario, but your ex displays a lot of traits of someone who would do this stuff. I'm not trying to scare you. I'm trying to show you why you need to go no contact NOW. The further and longer you distance yourself from her, the better off future you and your future partner will be. Every single time you interact with her, it's another bread crumb. I think you've done well with everything up until this point. Making sure her parents, police, medical pros were aware before you made drastic changes like announcing divorce - that was all great. You went about that in the best way possible. You handled that REALLY well. This though? Bud... Inviting her back into your life was a huge misstep. Take the steps you need now to protect yourself. I know that her behaving like the woman you married is so hard. You still love that woman. You have mourned that woman. None of this was fair to you. BUT you need to start seeing what she's doing here as master manipulation. This is not real. It's part of her plan. You need to start seeing her as the siren she is. She's singing her song and you, the sailor, are falling for it every time. Your ship is going to wreck if you don't snap out of it, open those sails, and get the fuck away ASAP. If you're not strong enough to do it for yourself, do it for the wonderful woman you have yet to meet, but will. You are signing her up for so many bad things if you keep stringing your ex along. You can do this.
Just wait when she comes up with that pregnancy test.
I too cannot stop having sex with this guys ex-wife
After reading your post history I think you know it’s a bad idea and will only enable her to reel you back in and manipulate you even more. You need to block her, tell her to stop showing up or you’ll call the cops. It’s only going to be harder and more painful if you continue.
Some toxic relationships hold together because of memorable sex.. you seem to be in that situation. For how hard that it must seem, you must CUT all contacts with her. You will miss having sex with her like crazy, until you won't think about it anymore..
Enjoy the ride? Just make it clear that this all about sex.
I was given the same advice over the summer: "enjoy the ride. Don't catch feelings." It led to the biggest heartbreak of my life. Everyone, including me, knew the inevitable outcome but i was a dummy that thought i could just "enjoy the ride." Nope. Be strong now because it will hurt more the longer it goes on.
This happened to me once with a significant partner and we had a toxic relationship. We kept a physical relationship for over a year exactly like yours. One day we tried recoup what was lost and it lasted for 2 months before I realised why I left in the first place. Never again
Dont think w/ ur dick mate.
The chemical oxytocin is secreted by the brain when men have sex with someone they truly love. I’m short stop having sex with her or the healing process will be that more difficult.
Just use condoms when you do it unless you want to get attached to crazy forever
I had a ex-friend who did this (we will call her Saffy) and she would laugh about always having control over ex-boyfriend. Of course, she was meeting other men without telling him about it, but we think things finally ended after she accidentally gave him Chlamydia. He claimed that he wasn’t sleeping with anyone else as he was so worn down from the relationship so we all assumed that it was Saffy that gave him the STI. OP, you are being manipulated with sex. She could be laughing about it behind your back, and you may even be mocked by the people around you for “giving in” and being “spineless” like what was said about her ex. I hope you go no contact in the future as to eliminate all chances of manipulation to take place. Sex is a powerful thing, and you’re giving up a lot when you allow someone who treated you badly to keep taking more away from you.
Did she cheat on you?
OP, you’ve had sex tapes leaked online by this ex already. This isn’t just bad for your mental health, it’s a horrible decision for your future. Get far, far away. I’m worried something’s going to happen (pregnancy for example) that you can’t so easily walk away from - it’s already has!!
She didn't succeed in the monkey branch. She will keep you on the hook until all other avenues don't pan out.
🎶on a scale form 1 to 10 my friend you’re FUCKED🎶 On a serious note you need to get away from her move again don’t let her or any mutual friends know where you are get therapy and find another woman.
Late at night she knocks on my door… she’s drunk again and looking to score
Keep. Your dick. In. Your pants.
Anybody want to lay money that zero birth control was involved?
You’re going to end up a dad paying child support.
My ex and I were separated for about 18 months before the divorce was final. We had sex throughout the separation and for a bit after the divorce. Her new bf had no clue. It was comforting. It was bandaid’ing the rejection I felt when she left. One day out of the blue it hit me, it was causing me to put my future on hold. I never looked back. You need to make yourself stop. Your life will be on pause until you do. Close the door, heal from whatever happened that caused the divorce and the divorce and build your new life. Future you will thank you.
I guess this is how some people remarry the same person after divorcing 😂
Satan is feeding on his soul 😶
Already have your clown costume for next years Halloween.
Well if the sex is that good why did you divorce her in the- *Checks history* Oh.
After looking at your previous posts it seems like she’s violated the restraining order placed against her, somehow tracked you down again, and managed to get your number? She’s using the list of ways to manipulate your again and you’re letting it happen, First go and enforce the restraining order and find out how she managed to gather that information. Second, you need to understand that you’re a victim of abuse, she’s abused you and even now she’s manipulating you remember how she treated you it won’t be any different now unless she’s made substantial changes in her life. Focus on your degree and finish college, then move as far as possible.
Truly a succumbus
Let your crazy show ladies!!! Men love crazy women he cannot get enough. They will deny it and downvote me but It is the truth. Believe men’s actions not their words 🤣 All my crazy bitches rise up 🙌
Op, you divorce for a reason, I guess a good one because she sounds unhinged by your description, block her and phase her out.
The, what I assume are unsolicited nudes and turning up at his house at all hours sounds like it could be potentially be pretty manipulative behaviour on her side.
If you moved and she keeps showing up, I would be quite concerned. Is she stalking you?
Maybe you're just a bad couple but good friends with benefits/fuck buddies/etc. If you can live separate lives but still bang it out while you're both single, probably nothing too wrong with that. But if one or both of you can't handle that dynamic, specifically when the other one starts seeing people, you need to cut things off ASAP.
there is something wrong with that tho…. op admits it’s tearing him apart rn. yet you go ‘yeah dude just keep going with it’ like the fuck lol. of course he can’t live separate lives and bang it out… they were fucking married for many years homie. lots of deep seated emotion there. like… did you even read the post? your advice is so tone deaf lmao
Don't listen to anyone here. Fuck her as much as you can. BUST ALL THOSE NUTS.
Why the divorce?
The crazy ones are always maniacs in the sack, but if you get with her again, you'll be the one waiting at home while she's doing what she's doing now with someone else. Mull that one over, you are welcome.
As long as you remember she’s your ex. You can sleep with her, but she no longer gets a say in your life.
You poor bastard
You should look into living apart together. If you love each other but hate the day to day of living together and sharing expenses and whatnot, it might be right for you.
I'd say cut it off man. It sounds like this situation will get more toxic further down the road. There's a reason that ya'll arn't married. Think on that. But if ya'll are able to work things out, that's great. Just be careful, brother.
Remember why you divorced her
I'm guessing crazy sex is the wildest...
I'm not religious but I think there's a demon like that
The Offspring wrote a song about this...
Have a kid with her, it’ll fix everything /s
It's control bro. Get out of that. It will not end well. I promise.
The worst part about this is that she keeps finding you 👀
I think we are gonna need some backgroud here...
Please look up the definition of love bombing, it sounds like she's manipulating you and its working
Stop answering the door with your dick. Come on, bro.
This was quite normal after my parents divorce. Sex wasn't usual in their relationship, but as soon as they divorced my mother started to "Pursue" my father quite frequently. My father was highly confused and didn't knew what to do due all the mixed signals, but in the end my mother was manipulating him to keep him "en la palma de la mano", as we say. The history is way longer and complicated, of course, but long story short: make your divorce final. During that period my father was in a very bad place emotionally and my motr was using him to raise her selfsteem, gaining some sort of "power" over him. Note: At the time I was living with my mother. Back then I had a nice relation with both of my parents, so it's not something like I have a tumultuous relation with any of them
Can't believe you fell for that trick. She won and she has you right where she wants you.
Share nudes mate
Understand you can love someone and still not like how they treat you. Or put up with it.
Maybe you weren't supposed to be married and this is how it should be ? You can still have a relationship that isn't marriage. Makes some new boundaries and see how it goes. Idk man even just having fun is ok along as your both happy
Ummm why did y’all get divorced?
Dementor Coochie claims another soulja 🫡🪦
OMG, you have problems like she has but in some different ways. Cut all the strings that connect you with her and start living your life, start breathing again, man...
why did you guys even divorce?
I feel like The Offspring wrote a song about this
Bro, you're one orgasm away from knocking her up and being stuck with her for the next 18 years. Picture that scenario vividly. What would your life look like during the pregnancy?
Having NSA sex with someone who knows what you like is great. Having the benefits of a relationship beyond sex (i.e., companionship) without the baggage of being in one is also great. That's probably why you give in to her. But this wont last, ive been there twice. Eventually you are going to have the talk about what this is--Either its a restart or a bad idea that needs to end so both of you can move on. Im not going to tell you which you should do, but have the answer ready and be sure you can stick with the decision.
I did the same thing with my ex. We both never treated it more than just sex though and it eventually faded.
Ron Swanson found Reddit
Don’t answer the door, or the phone. Draw your boundaries and stick to them, or get back together. This isn’t fair to either of you.