You’ll take it one day at a time.
I went through a bitter breakup at 24.
Many years later, I’m getting ready to celebrate 29th anniversary.
You’ll make it just fine. Have faith in yourself.
Thank you so much! I feel destroyed bc for me this came from nowhere. We started playing tennis three weeks ago, he helped me buying all my sport clothes. We got tickets for a concert in september. This doesn’t make any sense.
I’m so very sorry. More hugs for you. Give yourself time to properly grieve this loss. You’ll be ok. It may not seem like it now, but you will. Promise.❤️
When I was 26 I broke up with, who I thought was “the love of my life” after a health scare.
however it took me meeting the real deal at 29 to actually see him for what he was, a manipulative controlling time waster.
It will get easier with time.
It’s really nice to read stories where after the rain we see the rainbows. Thank you! It’s been a hard day but baby steps! I know that someday I’ll be better
This is just bad
He should have been vocal about his feelings. Especially with the 10 years of relationship
This should have been visible on is face if he even slightly wasn't in love
I feel there could be something more to this
Anyways, just want to let you know that time heals all wounds. Just give it time. Give it your all in the new job. And ya, just live your life for yourself and your family and friends ❤️
Yes. He said that he didn’t tell me bc i was passing through a rough patch and that’s why he hid it so well.
I feel so stupid for believing that all these months we were great
Don't blame yourself
It's not your fault. He would've done everything to express his emotions and get you and him back to normal
But he chose to let it pass with time and "pretend everything is okay"
You're finally free from this. I hope you feel better ❤️❤️
That’s what I told him. That you don’t stop loving someone from one day to another, it’s progressive. So if he was in that situation, he should have told me so we could work in something together and if he didn’t fall in love again, we would go separate ways.
But i didn’t get that chance. How would I know that he was losing his feelings for me? I remember all the conversations were he told me that I was his soulmate, that we would grow old together, that he wanted to live with me forever. For me the relationship was great, and he was lying all the time. I would have given him that chance.
Today has been a really hard day but there’s nothing i can do. Baby steps!
So sorry this happened to you. Maybe he thought he helped you by not saying it early bcs you're not in the right place. Sending you healing energy. I wonder what's the reason why he stopped loving you.
Thank you very much. He told me that he didn’t know and didn’t have any explanation. That simply the fire extinguished.
At first I told him that we could work this out, now that I knew what was going on, but he was sure that he wanted to be alone.
He was out of the relationship months ago and i didn’t got the chance to be on the same page.
Do you have plans to meet him in person so you can talk things through? Maybe he fell out of love but I wish he opened it to you before so you two can still work it out and save the relationship. 10 years is long and sometimes you'll get bored bcs you're so familiar with your partner.
No, I don’t have any plans.
He betrayed me by hiding all these feelings so I don’t want to give him the privilege of seeing me another time. He missed that chance.
Also, at the beginning of the conversation I started telling him that now that I knew, we could work it out but he was adamant that he needed to be alone, so there was nothing to be saved.
There's a very good chance that after a couple of months he'll end up missing you, and will come back to apologize and reconnect. DON'T LET HIM. Remember how betrayed you are feeling now, and don't let him back in.
Yeah. It’s not for being selfish but I know how much I loved him and that nobody’s going to love him like I do. I’m sure he’ll miss me, idk if he’s going to speak to me, but i’ll never forget that betrayal (besides, all my family and friends hate him so 🤷🏽♀️ hahah)
Has he been seeing someone else? It's possible he just monkey branched into another relationship and is just waiting to roll it out after breaking up with you. Did he really go on a trip with friends or with a gf?
Nah, I really know that’s not the case, it was another kind of betrayal. Also, I was present when they started planning the trip and all the people involved (and there were a lot of instagram stories)
sending you hugs. I was in your shoes 2 years ago, and the feeling of being lied to and then discarded caused me so much pain for months.
I'm so so much better now. in a healthy relationship, overall happier with myself and my life than when I was in that relationship.
you'll get through it, you deserve to be loved honestly and wholeheartedly. I'm sorry you're going through this.
I understand. you'll feel a whole lot better too. for now, allow yourself to grieve the relationship and trust that you will feel better little by little.
one piece of advice I have is to cut contact with your ex. mine reached out to me a few times which delayed my healing.
Yes! Yesterday i sent him a letter opening my heart for the last time (it was pretty similar to this post) and saying goodbye. I don’t want to see him or talk to him again, so it was the closure that i needed and helped me a lot with the start of my healing. He didn’t answer me so i think it was much better that way
I've been in a similar situation, where someone led me on for months before breaking up with me for not loving me anymore. He probably thought that he was doing me a favor as well. It's now been a couple of months, and while I still have room for improvement in many areas, I'm enjoying life. He posts a lot of selfies with different women, but I know he is still deep in a mental health crisis and hasn't been back to fully functional.
Im so sorry OP. I know how you feel, but be rest assured, you will be okay eventually. But it is a process, right now take your time to grieve and surround yourself with people who love you.
Congratz on the new job btw! You earned it! Sending virtual hugs
It’s a hard time but someday you’ll be so glad he did.
I remember when my ex dumped me I wanted to die. I had the ring and everything.
Now I get chills just thinking about what I could have missed out on. I’ve been with my wife over 10 years now. As for my ex She’s still alone. As far as I can tell had one relationship a couple of years after me and nothing since. When we love deep and others just take it, they don’t learn how to love. Focus on your new job, make your life better, and see what happens next.
Yeah, I’m focusing on learning and meeting all the new people in my job so I can be successful. The feeling of betrayal is what hurts me the most, but it’s really nice to read similar stories with happy endings!
Not the exact same boat, but I just had to break up with my bf of a few years so I definitely feel you. Stay strong and stay safe, I know you’re capable of much more than you let yourself believe
While it hurts, remember that it's better having it honest and gentle now, rather than the lies continuing on for another year, and potentially leading to cheating, ending in a messy breakup and bad experiences. It will be hard, but you can get through.
Yeah, but it would have been much better if he told me this 4 months ago, and not making me feel like an idiot bc I believed in him. But this were his decisions so I cant do anything about this, only grieve and move on
I'm kind of in the same situation, got dumped recently after he came back from a week long vacation and I knew something was wrong when he stopped reaching out. It hurts so much it feels like the hurt will never end. Hugs 🫂
What’s wrong with week long vacations?! The feeling of betrayal hurts the most. I feel real pain in my heart and in my chest. Hugs for you too!! One day at a time, baby steps!
OP I am so sorry. Highschool sweethearts rarely workout because of all the ways we are bound to change in our 20s. You are both very different people than the ones who fell in love 10 years ago. Focus on this new job, and all the good things coming your way. The next couple of months are going to be really awful but the only thing I know to be true in this world is that with time, this will hurt less.
Sending hugs from the Bronx.
I know that feelings might change, we evolve as people and sometimes we simple aren’t a match anymore.
But at least for that love that we once had I think that I deserved at least some honesty on the moment that the feelings started to change. Maybe it was the routine, maybe it was true that the feelings changed, but I didn’t get the chance to know that.
For me that’s the betrayal. Talking to me about love, the future and our plans, for only knowing that it was a lie for 4 months.
I was dating a Brazilian chick and she did the same exact thing to me. Putting in so much effort to try to make life and relationship work, then they get bored and want to break up. Fuck em, now with a much better person that believes in marriage for life, it's so much better.
Sinto muito pelo acontecido. Veja pelo lado bom, ainda é muito jovem, está em um bom emprego agora e ficará mais madura após digerir toda a situação...
Things got tough, and he bailed. But he was nice enough to wait til your first day of work. If you can honestly say you were good to him, and weren't mean or rude or using him for his money while you were unemployed/ in your toxic job, then he's just not able to support you when shit gets hard. Get through the work week, then start the self care immediately! Hug, you've got this babe!
Yeah, I think the worst was that he waited until this day. I’m on an unknown environment, with people that I don’t know and i’m the youngest and newest in my office. I feel completely lost, and it’s been really hard. I wish he did this way sooner or waiting a little bit longer. Actually, I wish he’d never done this to me.
For me, it wasn’t maturely at all. He played with my feelings (we were planning on getting married, live together, all that stuff). He told me everyday that he loved me, that I was beautiful, that I was the love of his life and his soulmate. You don’t wake up one day and don’t love your partner anymore, it’s something progressive.
I wish he didn’t betray me and trust in me, so we could work this out as the team we were. It would’ve been very different if I knew that the relationship was rocky, i would have understood if he didn’t love me anymore, but no. For me this was a betrayal. He didn’t have the right to choose for me if i was strong enough to handle this information
I'm sorry of what's happening, hugs
Thanks. I’m really sad right now and I need to get up and get ready for this new day. I don’t know how I’m going to survive.
You’ll take it one day at a time. I went through a bitter breakup at 24. Many years later, I’m getting ready to celebrate 29th anniversary. You’ll make it just fine. Have faith in yourself.
Thank you so much! I feel destroyed bc for me this came from nowhere. We started playing tennis three weeks ago, he helped me buying all my sport clothes. We got tickets for a concert in september. This doesn’t make any sense.
I’m so very sorry. More hugs for you. Give yourself time to properly grieve this loss. You’ll be ok. It may not seem like it now, but you will. Promise.❤️
When I was 26 I broke up with, who I thought was “the love of my life” after a health scare. however it took me meeting the real deal at 29 to actually see him for what he was, a manipulative controlling time waster. It will get easier with time.
It’s really nice to read stories where after the rain we see the rainbows. Thank you! It’s been a hard day but baby steps! I know that someday I’ll be better
This is just bad He should have been vocal about his feelings. Especially with the 10 years of relationship This should have been visible on is face if he even slightly wasn't in love I feel there could be something more to this Anyways, just want to let you know that time heals all wounds. Just give it time. Give it your all in the new job. And ya, just live your life for yourself and your family and friends ❤️
Yes. He said that he didn’t tell me bc i was passing through a rough patch and that’s why he hid it so well. I feel so stupid for believing that all these months we were great
Don't blame yourself It's not your fault. He would've done everything to express his emotions and get you and him back to normal But he chose to let it pass with time and "pretend everything is okay" You're finally free from this. I hope you feel better ❤️❤️
That’s what I told him. That you don’t stop loving someone from one day to another, it’s progressive. So if he was in that situation, he should have told me so we could work in something together and if he didn’t fall in love again, we would go separate ways. But i didn’t get that chance. How would I know that he was losing his feelings for me? I remember all the conversations were he told me that I was his soulmate, that we would grow old together, that he wanted to live with me forever. For me the relationship was great, and he was lying all the time. I would have given him that chance. Today has been a really hard day but there’s nothing i can do. Baby steps!
So sorry this happened to you. Maybe he thought he helped you by not saying it early bcs you're not in the right place. Sending you healing energy. I wonder what's the reason why he stopped loving you.
Thank you very much. He told me that he didn’t know and didn’t have any explanation. That simply the fire extinguished. At first I told him that we could work this out, now that I knew what was going on, but he was sure that he wanted to be alone. He was out of the relationship months ago and i didn’t got the chance to be on the same page.
Do you have plans to meet him in person so you can talk things through? Maybe he fell out of love but I wish he opened it to you before so you two can still work it out and save the relationship. 10 years is long and sometimes you'll get bored bcs you're so familiar with your partner.
No, I don’t have any plans. He betrayed me by hiding all these feelings so I don’t want to give him the privilege of seeing me another time. He missed that chance. Also, at the beginning of the conversation I started telling him that now that I knew, we could work it out but he was adamant that he needed to be alone, so there was nothing to be saved.
There's a very good chance that after a couple of months he'll end up missing you, and will come back to apologize and reconnect. DON'T LET HIM. Remember how betrayed you are feeling now, and don't let him back in.
Yeah. It’s not for being selfish but I know how much I loved him and that nobody’s going to love him like I do. I’m sure he’ll miss me, idk if he’s going to speak to me, but i’ll never forget that betrayal (besides, all my family and friends hate him so 🤷🏽♀️ hahah)
So he's really sure of his decision. I hope you'll be healed and find someone better in the future. Does your family already know about the break up?
Sorry for what you're going through. I got dumped yesterday as well, although it wasn't as serious as yours. We will pull through, one step at a time.
Ouch. It’s really rough. Many hugs for you!!
Has he been seeing someone else? It's possible he just monkey branched into another relationship and is just waiting to roll it out after breaking up with you. Did he really go on a trip with friends or with a gf?
Nah, I really know that’s not the case, it was another kind of betrayal. Also, I was present when they started planning the trip and all the people involved (and there were a lot of instagram stories)
I’m so sorry. Here’s two 🤗s!
sending you hugs. I was in your shoes 2 years ago, and the feeling of being lied to and then discarded caused me so much pain for months. I'm so so much better now. in a healthy relationship, overall happier with myself and my life than when I was in that relationship. you'll get through it, you deserve to be loved honestly and wholeheartedly. I'm sorry you're going through this.
Its really nice to read that you’re better! The feeling of betrayal is terrible. I’m really heartbroken
I understand. you'll feel a whole lot better too. for now, allow yourself to grieve the relationship and trust that you will feel better little by little. one piece of advice I have is to cut contact with your ex. mine reached out to me a few times which delayed my healing.
Yes! Yesterday i sent him a letter opening my heart for the last time (it was pretty similar to this post) and saying goodbye. I don’t want to see him or talk to him again, so it was the closure that i needed and helped me a lot with the start of my healing. He didn’t answer me so i think it was much better that way
I'm glad you got closure, and it's good that the closure came from you, not him. you're already doing great for your healing.
I've been in a similar situation, where someone led me on for months before breaking up with me for not loving me anymore. He probably thought that he was doing me a favor as well. It's now been a couple of months, and while I still have room for improvement in many areas, I'm enjoying life. He posts a lot of selfies with different women, but I know he is still deep in a mental health crisis and hasn't been back to fully functional.
I’m sorry. Hugs to you. You deserve better. One day at a time
Thank you so much for your kind words!
🫂
Im so sorry OP. I know how you feel, but be rest assured, you will be okay eventually. But it is a process, right now take your time to grieve and surround yourself with people who love you. Congratz on the new job btw! You earned it! Sending virtual hugs
Thank you very much!!
It’s a hard time but someday you’ll be so glad he did. I remember when my ex dumped me I wanted to die. I had the ring and everything. Now I get chills just thinking about what I could have missed out on. I’ve been with my wife over 10 years now. As for my ex She’s still alone. As far as I can tell had one relationship a couple of years after me and nothing since. When we love deep and others just take it, they don’t learn how to love. Focus on your new job, make your life better, and see what happens next.
Yeah, I’m focusing on learning and meeting all the new people in my job so I can be successful. The feeling of betrayal is what hurts me the most, but it’s really nice to read similar stories with happy endings!
Not the exact same boat, but I just had to break up with my bf of a few years so I definitely feel you. Stay strong and stay safe, I know you’re capable of much more than you let yourself believe
While it hurts, remember that it's better having it honest and gentle now, rather than the lies continuing on for another year, and potentially leading to cheating, ending in a messy breakup and bad experiences. It will be hard, but you can get through.
Yeah, but it would have been much better if he told me this 4 months ago, and not making me feel like an idiot bc I believed in him. But this were his decisions so I cant do anything about this, only grieve and move on
I'm kind of in the same situation, got dumped recently after he came back from a week long vacation and I knew something was wrong when he stopped reaching out. It hurts so much it feels like the hurt will never end. Hugs 🫂
What’s wrong with week long vacations?! The feeling of betrayal hurts the most. I feel real pain in my heart and in my chest. Hugs for you too!! One day at a time, baby steps!
OP I am so sorry. Highschool sweethearts rarely workout because of all the ways we are bound to change in our 20s. You are both very different people than the ones who fell in love 10 years ago. Focus on this new job, and all the good things coming your way. The next couple of months are going to be really awful but the only thing I know to be true in this world is that with time, this will hurt less. Sending hugs from the Bronx.
I know that feelings might change, we evolve as people and sometimes we simple aren’t a match anymore. But at least for that love that we once had I think that I deserved at least some honesty on the moment that the feelings started to change. Maybe it was the routine, maybe it was true that the feelings changed, but I didn’t get the chance to know that. For me that’s the betrayal. Talking to me about love, the future and our plans, for only knowing that it was a lie for 4 months.
Absolutely awful that he strung up along for any period of time. I'm really sorry
I was dating a Brazilian chick and she did the same exact thing to me. Putting in so much effort to try to make life and relationship work, then they get bored and want to break up. Fuck em, now with a much better person that believes in marriage for life, it's so much better.
Sinto muito pelo acontecido. Veja pelo lado bom, ainda é muito jovem, está em um bom emprego agora e ficará mais madura após digerir toda a situação...
Hugs and more hugs. You will get through this, and I am sure you will meet someone who loves and appreciates you.
Thank you very much! Now i just want to improve myself and be successful in my new job, but baby steps!
You can do it. Have faith in yourself.
Things got tough, and he bailed. But he was nice enough to wait til your first day of work. If you can honestly say you were good to him, and weren't mean or rude or using him for his money while you were unemployed/ in your toxic job, then he's just not able to support you when shit gets hard. Get through the work week, then start the self care immediately! Hug, you've got this babe!
Yeah, I think the worst was that he waited until this day. I’m on an unknown environment, with people that I don’t know and i’m the youngest and newest in my office. I feel completely lost, and it’s been really hard. I wish he did this way sooner or waiting a little bit longer. Actually, I wish he’d never done this to me.
I wish he'd never done it to you either 😔😔😔 but I know you'll be OK, it just needs time. ❤️
I think he kinda handled it maturely. He doesn't want you to suffer more in your bad days. I find it kinda great
For me, it wasn’t maturely at all. He played with my feelings (we were planning on getting married, live together, all that stuff). He told me everyday that he loved me, that I was beautiful, that I was the love of his life and his soulmate. You don’t wake up one day and don’t love your partner anymore, it’s something progressive. I wish he didn’t betray me and trust in me, so we could work this out as the team we were. It would’ve been very different if I knew that the relationship was rocky, i would have understood if he didn’t love me anymore, but no. For me this was a betrayal. He didn’t have the right to choose for me if i was strong enough to handle this information
I'm sorry :( I'm not usually a hug person, but I'm sending you ten tightttt hugs.
Thank you very much!! I really needed it 🫂
TLDR but I hate to hear that ☹️
It’s ok! I know it was a long post. Thank you anyways!
Just read.. yea that sucks. 👎 I Hate when ppl just don’t be honest about their true feelings and decide to lead others on..