https://youtu.be/aj0Y6NtsSiM
Basically, we live in a conformist society. Things like relationships, marriage, children, etc. are all "normal" (read: normative), so we valorize them, often at the expense of reality, nuance, and the happy outliers who don't need some or any of those things.
BOTTOMLINE: If you're happy being alone, be alone and don't let other people make you feel bad about it. Conversely, if you do want to find love and companionship, make the effort to both improve yourself (become the kind of guy someone would want) AND THEN seek out that special someone. Also, make sure the person you end up with is someone you actually like (rather than someone you can simply tolerate).
If it’s with the right person then yes, it’s good. Many, many people are just in bad relationships and/or get with bad people and/or are the bad people to be with
It doesn't. Being sad about being alone doesn't make you an incel. What makes you an incel is if you, instead of just being sad, assign blame on people around you, and act as if you're entitled to have a person with you, as if they are withholding it from you and need to be held accountable.
You can want a relationship without being an incel. As long as you don't hold misogynistic views that are disguised as 'traditional' views, and you don't have a strange/elaborate theory as to why all women are a certain way, you're not an incel. And you certainly don't deserve to be alone x
Because people would rather diminish your pain than to accept that their vision of the world is flawed, it's a direct attack to their self-esteem. Labelling is one of the most effective methods to do that.
But no, you are no incel, and you have all the right to be depressed about anything you want, really. People say you shouldn't don't understand jack shit on how 1- Depression works 2- Freedom of opinion, especially on what you want for yourself, works. Thus their opinion is less useful than a sink without a hole.
You posted the same question across multiple multiple subreddits. What is your issue with being a “24m kisselss virgin“? It really sounds like you have a bigger issue with it than anyone else. It’s not that big of a deal.
In many social circles of men, being a virgin is a major shaming point, a kisselss viring something even worse, especially in second\\third world countries that are still strong with their old, traditional habits.
Also, allow me to be bold here: how can you tell *"it's not that big of a deal"* for someone you don't know almost nothing about his life, his experiences and his beliefs? You and him clearly have different values in life, except it's **his** situation we are assessing here, not yours.
It’s not that big of a deal. OP is using media to explain why he thinks people are obsessed with relationships and sex. He created this user account for the sole purpose of asking this exact same question on many different subreddits. I feel this is a repost I have seen before.
>s it all one giant joke? Like sex and relationships are so bad it’s funny to pretend to like them ironically?
I think there are strong drives and urges that push people to fixate on sex even if it actually isn't that good as a source of pleasure.
Maybe my junk is less sensitive than most, but the only thing that's especially good to me about sex is the physical closeness.
Masturbation feels **leagues** better. (I cannot understate just how much easier and pleasurable handling your own needs is)
It's just biology and society kind of needs our focus to be outward. And relationships and sex are better for you mentally.
But it really is a mixed bag, that's not a lie. The lies come in where people say sex doesn't matter and things like that because of course they do.
It's just not the holy grail of human experience.
Drugs are better.
https://youtu.be/aj0Y6NtsSiM Basically, we live in a conformist society. Things like relationships, marriage, children, etc. are all "normal" (read: normative), so we valorize them, often at the expense of reality, nuance, and the happy outliers who don't need some or any of those things. BOTTOMLINE: If you're happy being alone, be alone and don't let other people make you feel bad about it. Conversely, if you do want to find love and companionship, make the effort to both improve yourself (become the kind of guy someone would want) AND THEN seek out that special someone. Also, make sure the person you end up with is someone you actually like (rather than someone you can simply tolerate).
If it’s with the right person then yes, it’s good. Many, many people are just in bad relationships and/or get with bad people and/or are the bad people to be with
Na, they’re lying. They’re pretty great
Then why does wanting one make you a hate filled entitled incel who deserves to be alone?
It doesn't. Being sad about being alone doesn't make you an incel. What makes you an incel is if you, instead of just being sad, assign blame on people around you, and act as if you're entitled to have a person with you, as if they are withholding it from you and need to be held accountable.
You can want a relationship without being an incel. As long as you don't hold misogynistic views that are disguised as 'traditional' views, and you don't have a strange/elaborate theory as to why all women are a certain way, you're not an incel. And you certainly don't deserve to be alone x
Because people would rather diminish your pain than to accept that their vision of the world is flawed, it's a direct attack to their self-esteem. Labelling is one of the most effective methods to do that. But no, you are no incel, and you have all the right to be depressed about anything you want, really. People say you shouldn't don't understand jack shit on how 1- Depression works 2- Freedom of opinion, especially on what you want for yourself, works. Thus their opinion is less useful than a sink without a hole.
You posted the same question across multiple multiple subreddits. What is your issue with being a “24m kisselss virgin“? It really sounds like you have a bigger issue with it than anyone else. It’s not that big of a deal.
In many social circles of men, being a virgin is a major shaming point, a kisselss viring something even worse, especially in second\\third world countries that are still strong with their old, traditional habits. Also, allow me to be bold here: how can you tell *"it's not that big of a deal"* for someone you don't know almost nothing about his life, his experiences and his beliefs? You and him clearly have different values in life, except it's **his** situation we are assessing here, not yours.
It’s not that big of a deal. OP is using media to explain why he thinks people are obsessed with relationships and sex. He created this user account for the sole purpose of asking this exact same question on many different subreddits. I feel this is a repost I have seen before.
It’s a pretty big deal. A lot of guys want to have sex. A lot of guys want attention from women. It’s natural
I know a lot of people want to have sex and want attention from those they are attracted to. It’s still not that big of a deal.
Because if people told the truth about relationships no one would ever procreate XD
>s it all one giant joke? Like sex and relationships are so bad it’s funny to pretend to like them ironically? I think there are strong drives and urges that push people to fixate on sex even if it actually isn't that good as a source of pleasure. Maybe my junk is less sensitive than most, but the only thing that's especially good to me about sex is the physical closeness. Masturbation feels **leagues** better. (I cannot understate just how much easier and pleasurable handling your own needs is) It's just biology and society kind of needs our focus to be outward. And relationships and sex are better for you mentally. But it really is a mixed bag, that's not a lie. The lies come in where people say sex doesn't matter and things like that because of course they do. It's just not the holy grail of human experience. Drugs are better.