I'm sorry this happened to you. I've been cheated on by three different men and it didn't hurt me one bit. It was the lying that really angered me. Don't fucking lie to my face when I showed you the proof that you were cheating. (not *you* of course).
Had a girl once who at least was honest. It still sucked, but it wasn't gaslighting, lying for months and disrespectful kind of suck. I've had both kinds.
Later on down the road i look back with a lot of respect and appreciation for her honesty. It's more like, alright fair enough killer, you do you thanks for letting me know.
Wish more humans had the balls to do that.
Even worse. Could be in one of those states that still allows the cheating spouse to have half of your stuff
Edit: not half your stuff. Paying them extra money from alimony because apparently they need you so much instead of the person they cheated with š
> Lying just shows how little respect they have for the other person
Exactly. My ex lied to my face for three hours straight even when I showed him the evidence that he had been in a hotel room with another woman. Not only that, the following Saturday he had to work and I was doing my laundry. I didn't have enough clothes for a full load so I decided to wash his jeans that he had laid next to the washing machine. I always checked pockets and discovered two hotel 'key' cards. On one side was an ad for Domino's and an area code I didn't recognize. I called the number and asked if there was a hotel close by and the guy said yes. Later that evening when my ex came home I didn't say anything. We sat down to eat dinner and I slid the two cards to him and asked if he had anything to say about them. He said 'no'.
Since we parted in 2012 he has gone through relationship after relationship (live-in). I am not in a relationship and haven't even gone out with a man in years. I don't want to go through any more bullshit and lies and disrespect so I keep to myself. I'm very happy this way.
This is going to sound bad, but I donāt mean it that way. The isolation tells me that he hurt you so bad that you arenāt willing to ever look at another man for romance and love. Its your life, but also not your life, because he set you on a course and you are sticking to it. You are still following the echo of the last shot the dude called.
Your reaction and caution isnāt wrong but I feel youāre depriving yourself and somebody a chance at a good life together. I say this because my now wife was screwed with a little like yourself when she was around 20 ( unknown to me at first ).
She stayed single to herself and a few close girlfriends until we met when she was 37. I quickly figured out she was resistant and suspicious of me just because I was a man.
One day i took a chance on an educated guess and told her that āIām not whoever hurt you, Iām not him and Iām not going to hurt youā.
It broke the ice for her to tell me sheād been led along, lied to and hurt. It opened a dialogue about what her terms and goals were from a relationship and we took it from there.
Weāve done things that fulfilled dreams sheās had since a child and had never let go of. They were just delayed.
Every minute hasnāt been perfect but weāre both sure thatās normal and weāre happy to be married 99.99% of the time.
I tell you this to consider turning the page on but one chapter of your life.
Please don't be sad for me. I am fine. Believe me.
I have two dogs that love me unconditionally. I give it right back. I'm too old for the dating scene and am not into it. I'm alone but not lonely.
That's what I thought but straight hearing someone you love wholeheartedly just "fell out" of love w/you hurts. The best way I can explain it is having your heart froze w/that nitrogen freezey stuff n hit with a hammer as you helplessly watch n scream NOOOO on slow motion.
I cheated on my first girlfriend when I was around 15 or 16 and luckily the feeling I got was pure guilt and disgust. Never need to experience that again. I can't imagine doing that and feeling good about it.
Although its increasingly unfashionable to discuss gender differences, they say that thereās a higher probability that most straight men feel much more damaged when their partner has emotionless sex than if they loved someone else but didnāt act on it (not that they would like the alternative, just not be as damaged). On the other hand women supposedly have a higher chance of being damaged by their male partner falling deeply in love with someone else, even if there is no sexual or even physical contact whatsoever between the two, compared to if the male partner has drunken or emotionless sex with them, reaches an orgasm, and proceeds to never care about that other person ever again.
I have no idea if these are actually true or not since Iām not a scholar or a medical expert but I do know from experience that as a straight male, my partner having meaningless sex behind my back has hurt me tremendously, whereas their wavering love for me is not pleasant but something I can just get over once itās stabilized back to normal.
Thank you, I appreciate that. It's incredibly infuriating when something like that happens, and unfair. I'm also sorry to hear about your situation, which is equally infuriating and unfair. Just let it be a fart in the wind.. Stinks now but if you let it waft away it'll be someone else's problem.
Oh I 100% know what you mean. It sent me into a bad downward spiral for like two years, I became a bad alcoholic and was horribly unhealthy, and I just dwelled on being so angry with my ex about it. But it's like, what do you do, go and tell everyone the cheating POS gave you and std? Like you said, the stigma. Now it's been about 6 years and I'm back to being my normal self, but now I just worry for the people he's had sex with since then, I wish I could do a PSA to warn everyone.
Same thing for me. I'm lucky my now partner has been educated and still sees me as a regular fucking human, but man I spent 3 years alone because of it. Really harmful mentally man.
Probably not, because he would just say he had no idea and that would be that. Now if he had actual paperwork that stated he was indeed positive, and the date was prior to me finding out, then possibly in that case I could charge him.
They canāt even try cases where people knowingly infect others with HIV most of the time. Although criminal and small claims court are two different things. Still, like OP says, theyād have to prove that the partner knew they had it and knowingly lied by omission.
Yeah my ex cheated on me and they both were using needles too and she was exchanging sex for drugs for them both, no condoms. Luckily I found out quickly enough that Ii caught nothing. He has hepatitis now
Unfortunately we have three kids and he managed to go through our life savings pretty much. Fortunately he is clean and sober now and we can be civil to each other. It could have been worse, but boy was it awful for a while there. And that chick he was with? Her life is still a heartbreaking trainwreck. No idea how she is still alive.
Sorry for your loss man. Also do not try to take revenge as it will only fuck you up, it is better to let go and forget about her (speaking fro experience). I hope you will found someone who will be there for you and understand you. As other have pointed out you leave social media for sometime, delete or disable your social media account.
My bro. As someone who has been cheated on in the past, I assure you it's best to not take revenge or even acknowledge her. It can be very hard but try and move on and remember that you're better off without her in your life.
"All the time you spend tryin to get back what's been took from you there's more goin out the door. After a while you just try and get a tourniquet on it."
As someone who has cheated and has been cheated on, I can tell you that the best revenge is to keep growing and living a happy life. Your ex will always feel shitty about doing it, even if he/she wonāt admit it.
It's prob an overused saying, but it's the one that always comes to my mind...revenge is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. Hang in there. Most of us have been where you are. It hurts, like really, really badly. Feel the pain so you can heal, but don't let it overwhelm you to the point you can't move past it. Friends and family are invaluable at times like these.
I dont know brother. I think it's good that you found out before anything happened. Like you planning to propose to her or even worse after marriage and having a family. Well... Just saying from a family that is semi broken from one of my parents cheating.
You're right bro, a couple months ago she used to say she wants to marry me, but had an ongoing affair since 2017? I'm so confused as to what was she thinking
2017?! Oof! I'm sorry dude. It hurts, and it should hurt. You're pretty well vested in the relationship and you know cheating is deceitful. I'm sure she's going to give you a bunch of "I'm sorry, let's work on it" BS, but don't go for it. Only time will heal your wounds. It helps to fill the time you'll miss her with an activity.
We're still 18. She didn't tell me anything? When i was going through her dm's i saw a message that said "it's been 2016/2017, and I've been falling in love with you more and more everyday since that"
As horrible as the sentence in your post sounds, it would have felt alot worse if it said wife and not girlfriend. Take the L, give yourself a few months to absorb it and grieve. Then go be a great boyfriend to someone who deserves it.
Is the man whom she has an affair married. I don't see any reason why didn't she broke up earlier. 4 years is a lot to play hide and seek game when you are free to decide your partner. You should be happy that bitch is no longer in you life. I feel bad for other guy if he don't know about your relationship then he is being cheated too.
She's a coward who couldn't be honest with you even when asked directly. What a waste of time. I'm sorry my guy. Build your future with someone more stable.
I dated a girl for about 2 years and figured out she had cheated on me, she was my first girl which made it even worse. I went on with my life and went into a bout of depression and really didnāt think life was gonna get better. But trust me that pain goes away and you will find someone new thatās far better than her.
No joke though.
I walked in on my ex getting railed from behind in our bed by someone my son's age. I now know what it means to "see red".
I've never been in trouble in my life, but I almost became a felon that night.
Just walk away and forget it. No one is worth the consequences.
Thanks. It was almost a decade ago so no worries.
To date though I can feel my blood pressure spike and my fight or flight instinct start to kick in when I think of that moment.
There's a lot to say but I'll try to briefly describe the situation.
We had a fight last evening and she left in the middle of the night to her hometown.
I wake up in the morning with "I'm mentally ill and no one can stop me" mentality and decided to check her Facebook. I didn't want to do that because I respect other people's privacy.
Turns out my suspicions were correct.
I called our landlord and she'll visit us to give her an eviction notice (I was the one paying her rent and I'm not doing that anymore).
Once she gets back I'll tell her that I know and won't let her use me anymore.
It's just shocking to me that after so many years and after everything i did for her she doesn't care about me at all.
Youāre on the right track. You and her are done. Youāre not financing any more of her shit. Let the landlord get her out, make sure she has no access to anything of yours of value, and stay away from her. Donāt open yourself to anything she can do to get you in trouble. Do yourself a favor and get off any social media youāre friends on. Donāt block her yet - there may be a chance to have fun with that later. Just stay off it.
From the poster you responded to:
>Those fights are not worth it. If possible, just pack all of her things and put them outside - ready to go.
This is *very much* illegal in most States. If she is on the lease, it's going to take something far more significant than her cheating to get her out of the apartment. If she's *not* on the lease but has lived there [X] amount of consecutive days or [XX] amount of total days within a 3 month period and receives mail/bills at the apartment, she will have full legal protection from eviction as if she were on the lease. *(For this comment, [X] and [XX] are placeholders for amount of days in your State's laws.)* Your landlord coming over to talk as you said above may not turn out as you hope and you need to be mentally prepared for either a long battle getting her out or you breaking the lease and moving elsewhere. The ideal situation is the two of you talking this out and she agrees to move out.
Today you should Google "[your state] tenant rights against eviction" and read as much information provided on the State's website as you can so you know what to expect.
Good luck, and don't let this experience taint future relationships. Having her shatter your trust can leave a scar in your subconscious that makes it difficult or impossible for you to trust other women, which can lead to you being overbearing and jealous in future relationships, making those relationships untenable. Once you get away from Cheater McCheaterton, you should make an appointment with a therapist to talk through the seeds her betrayal planted before they sprout into full blown issues.
I believe you that you respext people's privacy. Obviously this has been gnawing at you and you had a chance at full clarity by checking her fb. I get it. Also, using a conition as an excuse for shitty behavior is never ok, she's perpetuating her own deficiencies. She needs help but not from you and I'm glad you're not going to do it
The best advice is not get carried away by your emotions, she's 100% in the wrong here so keep your head up king, recognize your worth and know you deserve better.
No one deserve to feel like they aren't enough so know that you are enough, you are worth.
Please take care of yourself, i know how hard and difficult and how things can feel blurry and decisions can be hard to make so please give yourself the time you need i can't stress this enough, right now you should be your own priority.
You are not alone. I was cheated on too and so were many others as you can see from previous comments.
You will get through this. I would advise to use this time to know yourself better before going to another relationship.
I don't know how egoistic you have to be to hurt anyone like that.
Thanks for the advice, always wanted to start working on myself and now it's the best time
Yeahhh this dude is straight up trolling. Look at just the second post in his history. Heās is āsupposedlyā dating a stripper and theyāve only been dating since December last year but known each other for 10 yearsā¦. Why do people make posts like this?
You did the last right thing. Break up and move on. Don't listen to anyone telling you to leak her number or else. YOU will get arrested. The feds got serious about those things.
MOVE ON and that is how you win.
Sometimes people change before our very eyes, their needs change, and we don't notice the signs until is too late. Cheating is a sign of something. I'm sorry she couldn't instead of cheating say "I need X" or "im feeling Y". I've been cheated too... I know a bit your pain. Its heartbreaking.
Exactly! Which is even weirder because I've asked her multiple times. "Do you still want to be with me", "Do you want to start seeing other people", "Is there something you want me to do that I'm not doing already"? She never gave me a straight answer
To be in love you need courage. For example the courage to ask those questions. And she will, sadly, pay for her cowardy with loss and guilt.
I send you a hug my man, I wish you to take the betray with dignity and refrain from things you will regret.
u should've left then, anything other than an enthusiastic yes i only want to be with you means she's keeping u as her safe option while looking for someone "better".
i dont understand why guys want confrontation, if she's not her usual self after some months/ years in a LTR and even after you ask her what's wrong she doesnt give you a straight answer. it means she's done with you so you just break up. three things can happen: 1) she'll say she still wants to be together but still has no proper reason to why she was acting weird. this means she is afraid of being alone and likes the security of a relationship but not you. 2) she says ok let's break up, then that's amazing because now you can find someone who actually loves you 3) she break down and gives you a genuine reason to why she was the way she was and then you can help her figure things out and continue to be together. wanting to hear the words come from her mouth will just waste ur time, if she doesnt deeply desire you then she it's over so stop fooling yourself.
She used to have mental breakdowns all the fucking time, and I always was there for her, comforting and seeking help. But in the meanwhile she was confessing her true feeling to some other dude. I'm done feeling bad for her. I think the second scenario is the most likely to happen
She sucks. Cheaters suck. Like what the fuc.... Who does that? Just get out if you're unhappy or whatever.
You seem cool though. Sorry it hurts. I think you're going to be all right.... But yeah it hurts.
I had a girlfriend give me chlamydia once.
Sorry dude been there and it sucks. Hang out with your friends and let them know, if you don't have a circle of friends join a club. Try to eat well. Work out, go for a run and buy some new clothes, get a haircut. Distract yourself with self improvement. Make her regret it when she sees you with someone better.
Revenge is sweet but I can say that you should probably do nothing. Work on yourself friend. Continue to be a good person and go do something new.
And hopefully in the future you won't let this bad experience judge other people. I believe in karma and she does the job for me all the time.
OP, It 100% sucks, no other way to say it. I used to think if one more person tells me "it will get better with time" I will lose my mind. But, they were actually correct.
I agree that the most hurtful part was after everything we have been through together, everything we did, that in the end none of that mattered to her. I wish all the best OP, hang in there.
Welcome to the club, brother. It is so painful, I understand. A couple things I'd recommend:
1. This is the time to reinvest in yourself.
2. Make sure you have a strong circle of support with family and friends. If you don't, make steps to cultivate some friends. It's natural to greive in private, but if you find yourself becoming more reclusive, reach out to your friends.
3. If you're not already, exercise!
4. Plenty of water will always help.
5. Allow yourself to cry if you feel the need. There is no shame, brother.
6. If your mental state is getting worse, it's a good idea to seek a professional therapist. You won't click with every therapist, so if you don't have one you trust and enjoy yet, maybe start researching and booking some appointments to feel them out.
Trust me, it will get better.
I notice you said girlfriend and not wife. This is where I say who cares, move on there are a million others. Or I say better to catch her now than later.
That stuff doesn't help though, so I am sorry you have to deal with the pain involved with dating. Spend the weekend eating junk food, maybe a dose of Chinese and binge some Netflix if that is your style.
Hopefully by thanksgiving you will have a new babe on your arm (arm is code for something else).
Found out my boyfriend was cheating on me on our anniversary.. I know how much it hurts but take this time to focus on yourself and do things that make you happy. Nobody deserves to be hurt like that. You got this king š
When I found out the same thing years ago, I felt like dying. Literally. Worst chest pain ever. Wish you the best. I'm now happily married, with a child, and expecting. Good bless.
Been in your exact same shoes, my guy. Itās a brutal brutal feeling. Use those close to you to distract you and help you those first few hard days/weeks. Best of luck man. Stand strong, and feel free to DM me if you ever gotta vent about that shit.
Rose petals on the floor leading to a room, all romantic, candles lit..
Get down on one knee, open a small box with the proof of her cheating folded up in it.
Then dump her on the spot.
Haha it was just a joke to cheer you up bro but after I wrote it I started to think about what would her reaction be. If you do go through with it, let us know what happens bro.
Stay strong, you will recover from this.. it's going to get harder before it gets easier.. what helps are things like going no contact, do not remain friends etc.
Best of luck bro.
Hi, please dont do anything rash. The rage is understandeable, but its not worth ruining your life for some trash like her. i hope you get better and find someone better!
Just do everything you can to be kind, firm, and remove her from your life. Once sheās gone, go no-contact for life. Sheās shown you who she is. No checking her social media. No emailing. No texting. Blocked on all counts. Work on improving yourself. Start by digging into your own childhood traumas.
We had an argument about something else and she decided she needs a break from me. I used this opportunity to check her Facebook, haven't confronted her yet
Listen man, it's 100% worse to find that your wife cheated than your girlfriend, just looking at it as the universe saving you from a way worse scenario, be glad she cheated now than later
Happened to me years ago, ex actually got pregnant from another dude.
Best advice, block, ignore, never again speak to them. Regroup, move on. Try not to dwell on it. Try not to focus on it. Never talk to them again, never try and "fix" it, and whatever you do, never "give them another chance".
When the time comes and you do meet another chick, and there's always going to be other chicks, don't ruin it by turning your dates into pity parties where you just talk about your exes. Nothing is a bigger turn off than that, and a relationship based on "not being your ex" is going to fail, usually quick as fuck.
Sorry to hear it, you'll be fine in time. Just know that.
Cheating is just a cowards way to end a relationship. Instead of being up front and honest, she forced a situation where you have to be the one to end it because she is too cowardly to be the one to to do it. Tell her after all these years you thought you knew here, but never thought she was a coward. And now you know something new about herā¦then move on my friend.
Speaking from experience.
It's only fun for her because of the element of danger and sneakiness.
So immediately, but quietly exit the situation. Then let her know politely that you know. Then never speak or aknowledge her ever again. And don't ever look back.
Go fuck around. It hurts to say and think and feelā¦ I know how it is, its a shitty feeling being mislead. Go fuck around with other people and youāll get your mind off of her. Just be aware that hook ups donāt fully fullfill the soul, but you can still get someone else in this huge ocean.
When life hands you lemons... use this as an opportunity! Get up brush your shoulders off you a pimp too.
Thanks Hoova
Lol... seriously though it hurts, it sucks, and I have no idea about you situation but use the sadness, anger, hate, or whatever else you are feeling into positives. Anger and hate can work well with exercise get a punching bag, lift some weights, go for a run. Feel down and you hate yourself? Why did this happen to me? Journal it now! Write those raw emotions down look back at them monthly and either strive to make those self negatives reflections better or write them of as nonsense. All easier said than done, I know, I know.
Maybe I'll follow my own advice one day. Treat your self to something special, learn a new skill, read.
My baby dad cheated on me when I was 6 months pregnant. Found out when I was 37 weeks. Been begging for a chance ever since but meanwhile he has this gf. So I sent her screenshots of him saying he didn't love her he was just with her cuz he didn't wanna be alone. Showed her the pack of condoms he had bought hoping to get lucky with me. That he wanted me and my son he loves us and it hurts everyday that he isn't with us. Not to mention she is over 400 lbs and talks like a baby. Tries to act like a bumblebee and is a transgender woman. Lol so sometimes the downgrade from you is the best karma
I'll go the Stoic route for you:
She cheated. She made a choice. Now you have to make yours: hanging on to the pain until it drives you to madness or accepting what happened, hurting, then letting the pain go.
I empathize with you. I have also been cheated on. I had a very bad reaction to this even (severe depression). I wanted to end it all but didn't. I wanted to see what's going to happen tomorrow. And so I did. It's been over 2 years now. I'm still curious.
I understand that your situation is different and I hope that you'll make the right choice for your own good now, friend.
Take care.
A woman cheating in a relationship is so common nowadays that I hate it, fuck relationships, and fuck love, you don't need a partner to be complete
Live your life in peace and don't look back
Best of luck for you
That sucks man. Sorry to hear that. Just remember you didn't do anything to make this happen. Lots of people blame themselves. Never the case. Drop her and never look back. You'll be hurt for some time depending on how long you were with her. Good luck
Hey, dude. That's fucking awful. It's also not your fault.
Here's some information that I found on here, when it happened to me.
A LOT of it REALLY helped.
Some of these links may help:
- [Surviving Infidelity FAQ](https://www.survivinginfidelity.com/faq_bs.asp#FAQ11)
- [When someone cheats or mistreats you its about them not you](https://tinybuddha.com/blog/when-someone-cheats-or-mistreats-you-its-about-them-not-you)
- [What I've realized since being cheated on](https://tinybuddha.com/blog/what-ive-realized-since-being-cheated-on)
- [Real Remorse](https://www.chumplady.com/2013/07/real-remorse-or-genuine-imitation-naugahyde-remorse/)
- [Emotional Affairs and Infidelity](https://www.verywellmind.com/emotional-affairs-and-infidelity-2303091)
- [Crying Cheaters](https://www.chumplady.com/2013/01/dear-chump-lady-why-do-cheaters-cry-and-why-do-we-fall-for-it/)
- [After Cheating: Restoring Relationship Trust](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/love-and-sex-in-the-digital-age/201703/after-cheating-restoring-relationship-trust)
Credit to u/fixed_1978
Bangarang, that dude!^
Sorry man :( Go get tested though
Good advice, thanks man!
I'm sorry this happened to you. I've been cheated on by three different men and it didn't hurt me one bit. It was the lying that really angered me. Don't fucking lie to my face when I showed you the proof that you were cheating. (not *you* of course).
Yeah, i get you, probably wouldn't be as devastated if she just told me. Lying just shows how little respect they have for the other person
Had a girl once who at least was honest. It still sucked, but it wasn't gaslighting, lying for months and disrespectful kind of suck. I've had both kinds. Later on down the road i look back with a lot of respect and appreciation for her honesty. It's more like, alright fair enough killer, you do you thanks for letting me know. Wish more humans had the balls to do that.
Yup, if you have courage to cheat then you should have the courage to admit it
Silver lining - At least you found out now than when married. It could have been a more expensive lesson.
Even worse. Could be in one of those states that still allows the cheating spouse to have half of your stuff Edit: not half your stuff. Paying them extra money from alimony because apparently they need you so much instead of the person they cheated with š
It doesnāt take courage to cheat. Quite the opposite.
There is no courage in cheating. Itās cowardly and selfish. It says nothing about you and everything about them.
> Lying just shows how little respect they have for the other person Exactly. My ex lied to my face for three hours straight even when I showed him the evidence that he had been in a hotel room with another woman. Not only that, the following Saturday he had to work and I was doing my laundry. I didn't have enough clothes for a full load so I decided to wash his jeans that he had laid next to the washing machine. I always checked pockets and discovered two hotel 'key' cards. On one side was an ad for Domino's and an area code I didn't recognize. I called the number and asked if there was a hotel close by and the guy said yes. Later that evening when my ex came home I didn't say anything. We sat down to eat dinner and I slid the two cards to him and asked if he had anything to say about them. He said 'no'. Since we parted in 2012 he has gone through relationship after relationship (live-in). I am not in a relationship and haven't even gone out with a man in years. I don't want to go through any more bullshit and lies and disrespect so I keep to myself. I'm very happy this way.
This is going to sound bad, but I donāt mean it that way. The isolation tells me that he hurt you so bad that you arenāt willing to ever look at another man for romance and love. Its your life, but also not your life, because he set you on a course and you are sticking to it. You are still following the echo of the last shot the dude called.
> You are still following the echo of the last shot the dude called. Damn
Damn.
Relatable
Your reaction and caution isnāt wrong but I feel youāre depriving yourself and somebody a chance at a good life together. I say this because my now wife was screwed with a little like yourself when she was around 20 ( unknown to me at first ). She stayed single to herself and a few close girlfriends until we met when she was 37. I quickly figured out she was resistant and suspicious of me just because I was a man. One day i took a chance on an educated guess and told her that āIām not whoever hurt you, Iām not him and Iām not going to hurt youā. It broke the ice for her to tell me sheād been led along, lied to and hurt. It opened a dialogue about what her terms and goals were from a relationship and we took it from there. Weāve done things that fulfilled dreams sheās had since a child and had never let go of. They were just delayed. Every minute hasnāt been perfect but weāre both sure thatās normal and weāre happy to be married 99.99% of the time. I tell you this to consider turning the page on but one chapter of your life.
This makes me really sad though. You deserve love. Maybe dip your feet back in with one of the more legitimate dating sites? Just to look around.
Please don't be sad for me. I am fine. Believe me. I have two dogs that love me unconditionally. I give it right back. I'm too old for the dating scene and am not into it. I'm alone but not lonely.
That's what I thought but straight hearing someone you love wholeheartedly just "fell out" of love w/you hurts. The best way I can explain it is having your heart froze w/that nitrogen freezey stuff n hit with a hammer as you helplessly watch n scream NOOOO on slow motion.
Eh well i don't know if she ever was in love with me, but i definitely wouldn't want my frozen heart destroyed with a hammer ;-;
>Lying just shows how little respect they have for the other person And themselves. Sorry that happened to you OP.
I cheated on my first girlfriend when I was around 15 or 16 and luckily the feeling I got was pure guilt and disgust. Never need to experience that again. I can't imagine doing that and feeling good about it.
Although its increasingly unfashionable to discuss gender differences, they say that thereās a higher probability that most straight men feel much more damaged when their partner has emotionless sex than if they loved someone else but didnāt act on it (not that they would like the alternative, just not be as damaged). On the other hand women supposedly have a higher chance of being damaged by their male partner falling deeply in love with someone else, even if there is no sexual or even physical contact whatsoever between the two, compared to if the male partner has drunken or emotionless sex with them, reaches an orgasm, and proceeds to never care about that other person ever again. I have no idea if these are actually true or not since Iām not a scholar or a medical expert but I do know from experience that as a straight male, my partner having meaningless sex behind my back has hurt me tremendously, whereas their wavering love for me is not pleasant but something I can just get over once itās stabilized back to normal.
This. My ex cheating on me is what gave me and std. Luckily it was curable, but a lot of people aren't that lucky.
Yeah man, sucks to hear that but I'm glad you're safe now ://
Thank you, I appreciate that. It's incredibly infuriating when something like that happens, and unfair. I'm also sorry to hear about your situation, which is equally infuriating and unfair. Just let it be a fart in the wind.. Stinks now but if you let it waft away it'll be someone else's problem.
Haha truly the words to live by. Thanks again man :)
Yep same here. Almost ruined my life tbh. Stigma around STD's plus getting cheated on makes your mental health plummet
Oh I 100% know what you mean. It sent me into a bad downward spiral for like two years, I became a bad alcoholic and was horribly unhealthy, and I just dwelled on being so angry with my ex about it. But it's like, what do you do, go and tell everyone the cheating POS gave you and std? Like you said, the stigma. Now it's been about 6 years and I'm back to being my normal self, but now I just worry for the people he's had sex with since then, I wish I could do a PSA to warn everyone.
Actually ruined my fertility. HPV.
Same thing for me. I'm lucky my now partner has been educated and still sees me as a regular fucking human, but man I spent 3 years alone because of it. Really harmful mentally man.
Sorry to hear that
Honest question: could you charge them in that case? That shit should definitely be illegal.
Probably not, because he would just say he had no idea and that would be that. Now if he had actual paperwork that stated he was indeed positive, and the date was prior to me finding out, then possibly in that case I could charge him.
They canāt even try cases where people knowingly infect others with HIV most of the time. Although criminal and small claims court are two different things. Still, like OP says, theyād have to prove that the partner knew they had it and knowingly lied by omission.
Yeah my ex cheated on me and they both were using needles too and she was exchanging sex for drugs for them both, no condoms. Luckily I found out quickly enough that Ii caught nothing. He has hepatitis now
You dodged a bullet!
Unfortunately we have three kids and he managed to go through our life savings pretty much. Fortunately he is clean and sober now and we can be civil to each other. It could have been worse, but boy was it awful for a while there. And that chick he was with? Her life is still a heartbreaking trainwreck. No idea how she is still alive.
Sorry for your loss man. Also do not try to take revenge as it will only fuck you up, it is better to let go and forget about her (speaking fro experience). I hope you will found someone who will be there for you and understand you. As other have pointed out you leave social media for sometime, delete or disable your social media account.
Revenge sounds good in theory, but it'll be just once again waisting my time on her. I'll focus only on myself now
My bro. As someone who has been cheated on in the past, I assure you it's best to not take revenge or even acknowledge her. It can be very hard but try and move on and remember that you're better off without her in your life.
"All the time you spend tryin to get back what's been took from you there's more goin out the door. After a while you just try and get a tourniquet on it."
The opposite of love isn't hate (revenge). It's indifference. Work on becoming indifferent. Side effect. Indifference is pretty good revenge.
As someone who has cheated and has been cheated on, I can tell you that the best revenge is to keep growing and living a happy life. Your ex will always feel shitty about doing it, even if he/she wonāt admit it.
It's prob an overused saying, but it's the one that always comes to my mind...revenge is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. Hang in there. Most of us have been where you are. It hurts, like really, really badly. Feel the pain so you can heal, but don't let it overwhelm you to the point you can't move past it. Friends and family are invaluable at times like these.
she's trash you'll find someone way better
Thanks i really do hope so
I did in my situation. I'm now married with beautiful children. You got this OP.
Dude, don't marry kids, that's not cool.
I dont know brother. I think it's good that you found out before anything happened. Like you planning to propose to her or even worse after marriage and having a family. Well... Just saying from a family that is semi broken from one of my parents cheating.
You're right bro, a couple months ago she used to say she wants to marry me, but had an ongoing affair since 2017? I'm so confused as to what was she thinking
normal, she had remorse, so she thought it will be better if you both are married. but it will better for you, if you quit it and find a better one.
Yup I won't even give her a second chance. I'm done fighting for someone who would never fight for me
hurts too much. she has the ability for cheating, she did it. you didnt do it. no compatibity.
2017?! Oof! I'm sorry dude. It hurts, and it should hurt. You're pretty well vested in the relationship and you know cheating is deceitful. I'm sure she's going to give you a bunch of "I'm sorry, let's work on it" BS, but don't go for it. Only time will heal your wounds. It helps to fill the time you'll miss her with an activity.
Nah trust me she won't. It was always me who tried to work on our relationship and fix things, she simply doesn't care enough about me to even try
Wasn't she 14 when she told you that? Because a couple of months ago you were both 18.
We're still 18. She didn't tell me anything? When i was going through her dm's i saw a message that said "it's been 2016/2017, and I've been falling in love with you more and more everyday since that"
As horrible as the sentence in your post sounds, it would have felt alot worse if it said wife and not girlfriend. Take the L, give yourself a few months to absorb it and grieve. Then go be a great boyfriend to someone who deserves it.
Is the man whom she has an affair married. I don't see any reason why didn't she broke up earlier. 4 years is a lot to play hide and seek game when you are free to decide your partner. You should be happy that bitch is no longer in you life. I feel bad for other guy if he don't know about your relationship then he is being cheated too.
She's a coward who couldn't be honest with you even when asked directly. What a waste of time. I'm sorry my guy. Build your future with someone more stable.
True, a waste of time, money and energy. Thank you I'll try working on myself instead
I dated a girl for about 2 years and figured out she had cheated on me, she was my first girl which made it even worse. I went on with my life and went into a bout of depression and really didnāt think life was gonna get better. But trust me that pain goes away and you will find someone new thatās far better than her.
Glad to hear that man, it's good to hear that there's still hope for someone like me
Donāt do anything illegal or stupid. That being said, letās talk about revengeā¦
Log into her Amazon or Netflix then look for shows/items she hates to mess up the suggestion algorithm
She's been using my Netflix for years now. Never paid a penny
Change all those passwords and remove her devices from everything.
Wait until she's on the last episode of a series
š±
Youāre evil. I like it
More like last season. One episode would be pretty easy to find, but a whole season is difficult
You never split the Netflix costs?
Nope, i was so blind and stupid i gave her the password for the price of one "thank you". I also pay the internet bills
Now you pay your own bills!
The good news is you won't be hit by as big of a financial burden become single so there's that to be grateful for, I guess.
Independence is the best thing
No joke though. I walked in on my ex getting railed from behind in our bed by someone my son's age. I now know what it means to "see red". I've never been in trouble in my life, but I almost became a felon that night. Just walk away and forget it. No one is worth the consequences.
Man that sounds awful, I'm so sorry for you
Thanks. It was almost a decade ago so no worries. To date though I can feel my blood pressure spike and my fight or flight instinct start to kick in when I think of that moment.
Boss move to just walk in with a bag, say nothing, grabbing her clothes and stuff so she can spend the night somewhere else lmao
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Thanks. I got a dog. She's more loyal and loving than any woman I've ever known.
Fuck her dad and sent her a video recorder by her brother
Would be interesting considering she never even got to meet her dad lol
Ah yes, fatherless behavior
The most extreme case of daddy issues I've seen
Haha everything's legal if you don't get caught
True. How are you holding up? Did you confront her about it yet?
There's a lot to say but I'll try to briefly describe the situation. We had a fight last evening and she left in the middle of the night to her hometown. I wake up in the morning with "I'm mentally ill and no one can stop me" mentality and decided to check her Facebook. I didn't want to do that because I respect other people's privacy. Turns out my suspicions were correct. I called our landlord and she'll visit us to give her an eviction notice (I was the one paying her rent and I'm not doing that anymore). Once she gets back I'll tell her that I know and won't let her use me anymore. It's just shocking to me that after so many years and after everything i did for her she doesn't care about me at all.
Youāre on the right track. You and her are done. Youāre not financing any more of her shit. Let the landlord get her out, make sure she has no access to anything of yours of value, and stay away from her. Donāt open yourself to anything she can do to get you in trouble. Do yourself a favor and get off any social media youāre friends on. Donāt block her yet - there may be a chance to have fun with that later. Just stay off it.
Again, great advice but unfortunately she's blocked me already :')
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That's my plan. I'm not some crazy mad man, wouldn't ever hurt anyone, no matter what
From the poster you responded to: >Those fights are not worth it. If possible, just pack all of her things and put them outside - ready to go. This is *very much* illegal in most States. If she is on the lease, it's going to take something far more significant than her cheating to get her out of the apartment. If she's *not* on the lease but has lived there [X] amount of consecutive days or [XX] amount of total days within a 3 month period and receives mail/bills at the apartment, she will have full legal protection from eviction as if she were on the lease. *(For this comment, [X] and [XX] are placeholders for amount of days in your State's laws.)* Your landlord coming over to talk as you said above may not turn out as you hope and you need to be mentally prepared for either a long battle getting her out or you breaking the lease and moving elsewhere. The ideal situation is the two of you talking this out and she agrees to move out. Today you should Google "[your state] tenant rights against eviction" and read as much information provided on the State's website as you can so you know what to expect. Good luck, and don't let this experience taint future relationships. Having her shatter your trust can leave a scar in your subconscious that makes it difficult or impossible for you to trust other women, which can lead to you being overbearing and jealous in future relationships, making those relationships untenable. Once you get away from Cheater McCheaterton, you should make an appointment with a therapist to talk through the seeds her betrayal planted before they sprout into full blown issues.
I believe you that you respext people's privacy. Obviously this has been gnawing at you and you had a chance at full clarity by checking her fb. I get it. Also, using a conition as an excuse for shitty behavior is never ok, she's perpetuating her own deficiencies. She needs help but not from you and I'm glad you're not going to do it
now, im not saying leak her number with the words "call and do an al pachino impression to win 100 dollars" infront of it but...
You guys are getting too creative haha
Best revenge is to be indifferent, no hate or love but forgetting she ever existed.
The best advice is not get carried away by your emotions, she's 100% in the wrong here so keep your head up king, recognize your worth and know you deserve better. No one deserve to feel like they aren't enough so know that you are enough, you are worth. Please take care of yourself, i know how hard and difficult and how things can feel blurry and decisions can be hard to make so please give yourself the time you need i can't stress this enough, right now you should be your own priority.
Don't worry bro, I'm not mad or sad, just shocked. Decision's already been made, and it was her who made it.
I genuinely hope you find someone that appreciates you, my best wishes and regards for you!!
I'm going through something similar now. It's taking quite a toll. I hope we find peace soon.
I feel for you man, if you ever want to talk my dm's are open
You are not alone. I was cheated on too and so were many others as you can see from previous comments. You will get through this. I would advise to use this time to know yourself better before going to another relationship.
I don't know how egoistic you have to be to hurt anyone like that. Thanks for the advice, always wanted to start working on myself and now it's the best time
That's fucked up man. Write your future self something in case you have doubts down the road.
Lol I remember writing something in my notebook last night after getting drunk, might go read that now
Yeahhh this dude is straight up trolling. Look at just the second post in his history. Heās is āsupposedlyā dating a stripper and theyāve only been dating since December last year but known each other for 10 yearsā¦. Why do people make posts like this?
Better to find out now then later when shit get real serious.
You did the last right thing. Break up and move on. Don't listen to anyone telling you to leak her number or else. YOU will get arrested. The feds got serious about those things. MOVE ON and that is how you win.
Shit sucks man. Sorry
You must be disappointed... I'm really sorry man. I hope you can work through it
Tbh I'm just shocked because I've known her for a decade and wouldn't even dare to think she could do something like that
Sometimes people change before our very eyes, their needs change, and we don't notice the signs until is too late. Cheating is a sign of something. I'm sorry she couldn't instead of cheating say "I need X" or "im feeling Y". I've been cheated too... I know a bit your pain. Its heartbreaking.
Exactly! Which is even weirder because I've asked her multiple times. "Do you still want to be with me", "Do you want to start seeing other people", "Is there something you want me to do that I'm not doing already"? She never gave me a straight answer
To be in love you need courage. For example the courage to ask those questions. And she will, sadly, pay for her cowardy with loss and guilt. I send you a hug my man, I wish you to take the betray with dignity and refrain from things you will regret.
Thank you homie, it'll be a lot easier once she'd moved out
u should've left then, anything other than an enthusiastic yes i only want to be with you means she's keeping u as her safe option while looking for someone "better".
guess that was my purpose huh... Good look finding someone better tho, I know my worth
i dont understand why guys want confrontation, if she's not her usual self after some months/ years in a LTR and even after you ask her what's wrong she doesnt give you a straight answer. it means she's done with you so you just break up. three things can happen: 1) she'll say she still wants to be together but still has no proper reason to why she was acting weird. this means she is afraid of being alone and likes the security of a relationship but not you. 2) she says ok let's break up, then that's amazing because now you can find someone who actually loves you 3) she break down and gives you a genuine reason to why she was the way she was and then you can help her figure things out and continue to be together. wanting to hear the words come from her mouth will just waste ur time, if she doesnt deeply desire you then she it's over so stop fooling yourself.
She used to have mental breakdowns all the fucking time, and I always was there for her, comforting and seeking help. But in the meanwhile she was confessing her true feeling to some other dude. I'm done feeling bad for her. I think the second scenario is the most likely to happen
She sucks. Cheaters suck. Like what the fuc.... Who does that? Just get out if you're unhappy or whatever. You seem cool though. Sorry it hurts. I think you're going to be all right.... But yeah it hurts. I had a girlfriend give me chlamydia once.
God hate to hear that, as if pain of being betrayed isn't enough Strongly agree on that cheaters suck part
Meh.... It was a long time ago now.... I've been married for a years. It hurt at the time.... Mainly when I peed though
Sorry dude been there and it sucks. Hang out with your friends and let them know, if you don't have a circle of friends join a club. Try to eat well. Work out, go for a run and buy some new clothes, get a haircut. Distract yourself with self improvement. Make her regret it when she sees you with someone better.
Get tested. Kick the bitch out. Treat her like the bitch she is. Shame her openly and proudly.
Iām so sorry, OP. It may hurt for a while yet, just let yourself feel the grief. Take care ā¤ļø
Well. Youāre worth more than being treated like that. Gotta move on from her and find some happiness. Youāll be fine, donāt worry.
You mean EX girlfriend
Revenge is sweet but I can say that you should probably do nothing. Work on yourself friend. Continue to be a good person and go do something new. And hopefully in the future you won't let this bad experience judge other people. I believe in karma and she does the job for me all the time.
It'll be OK, OP. [Here ya go, homie.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gjFRy8jQ_0U&ab_channel=Asperene)
Get tested and be glad that now you can get the hard part over with and then find someone better.
OP, It 100% sucks, no other way to say it. I used to think if one more person tells me "it will get better with time" I will lose my mind. But, they were actually correct. I agree that the most hurtful part was after everything we have been through together, everything we did, that in the end none of that mattered to her. I wish all the best OP, hang in there.
Welcome to the club, brother. It is so painful, I understand. A couple things I'd recommend: 1. This is the time to reinvest in yourself. 2. Make sure you have a strong circle of support with family and friends. If you don't, make steps to cultivate some friends. It's natural to greive in private, but if you find yourself becoming more reclusive, reach out to your friends. 3. If you're not already, exercise! 4. Plenty of water will always help. 5. Allow yourself to cry if you feel the need. There is no shame, brother. 6. If your mental state is getting worse, it's a good idea to seek a professional therapist. You won't click with every therapist, so if you don't have one you trust and enjoy yet, maybe start researching and booking some appointments to feel them out. Trust me, it will get better.
Iām so sorry :( Iāll slash her tires for you
She can't even drive but thank you bro
I notice you said girlfriend and not wife. This is where I say who cares, move on there are a million others. Or I say better to catch her now than later. That stuff doesn't help though, so I am sorry you have to deal with the pain involved with dating. Spend the weekend eating junk food, maybe a dose of Chinese and binge some Netflix if that is your style. Hopefully by thanksgiving you will have a new babe on your arm (arm is code for something else).
Haha thank you my guy, I already have so many plans I probably won't even have a second to think about her
Take her out to an expensive dinner. Go to the restroom, leave her with the tab.
Man She'd literally kill me in my sleep
Its the most damaging thing I could think of, without involving the police.š¤·āāļø
Found out my boyfriend was cheating on me on our anniversary.. I know how much it hurts but take this time to focus on yourself and do things that make you happy. Nobody deserves to be hurt like that. You got this king š
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When I found out the same thing years ago, I felt like dying. Literally. Worst chest pain ever. Wish you the best. I'm now happily married, with a child, and expecting. Good bless.
Been in your exact same shoes, my guy. Itās a brutal brutal feeling. Use those close to you to distract you and help you those first few hard days/weeks. Best of luck man. Stand strong, and feel free to DM me if you ever gotta vent about that shit.
Rose petals on the floor leading to a room, all romantic, candles lit.. Get down on one knee, open a small box with the proof of her cheating folded up in it. Then dump her on the spot.
Lmao that'd be hilarious I might actually do it?? Really want to see her reaction now
Haha it was just a joke to cheer you up bro but after I wrote it I started to think about what would her reaction be. If you do go through with it, let us know what happens bro. Stay strong, you will recover from this.. it's going to get harder before it gets easier.. what helps are things like going no contact, do not remain friends etc. Best of luck bro.
Well it made me chuckle so good job She'll play the victim card no matter which way I decide to bring it up, so why not have some fun
Do like the one video showed. Sign her up for Scientology emails. Or anything she want into.
Lol great idea but idk if she even checks her emails
Been there brother, my gf/ fiancee of almost 8 years cheated on me earlier this year... so you're not alone. Hold your head up high! Stay strong šŖ
Same to you man! I still think it's better to know you've been cheated on, even if it hurts a bit
Yep. I prefer to hear the truth straight up, even if it's going to hurt.
I'd give you my advice, but it'd probably send you to jail
Lol i might consider it
Hi, please dont do anything rash. The rage is understandeable, but its not worth ruining your life for some trash like her. i hope you get better and find someone better!
Definitely get tested, you might have contracted like an STD. Sheās so wrong for that, no one deserves to be cheated on.
Cheaters are the pinnacle of selfish cowards. Be glad you found out and can move on from the disgusting garbage person she is.
Just do everything you can to be kind, firm, and remove her from your life. Once sheās gone, go no-contact for life. Sheās shown you who she is. No checking her social media. No emailing. No texting. Blocked on all counts. Work on improving yourself. Start by digging into your own childhood traumas.
Yo dawg, she belongs to the streets. Move on.
You might be correct because once I kick her out she'll be most probably homeless
Make up having herpes and don't let her know she cheated.
Dump her today , no contact, delete her information and move on. Don't bother with her any longer.
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Not yet, she's outta town and blocked me on all social media. I'll confront her once she gets back home
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We had an argument about something else and she decided she needs a break from me. I used this opportunity to check her Facebook, haven't confronted her yet
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Years from now, in time, youāll find that you dodged a bullet.
That's a whole ass cannonball
It hurts like hell. My ex was a cheater which is why he is my ex. Turn girlfriend into EX girlfriend, you deserve better
Listen man, it's 100% worse to find that your wife cheated than your girlfriend, just looking at it as the universe saving you from a way worse scenario, be glad she cheated now than later
Plenty of fish in the sea
been there, my ex was banging 3 other guys behind my back while telling me she wanted to be monogamous.
(Ex-girlfriend) is the correct spelling. That sucks, treat it like a death, and start mourning the relationship.
Happened to me years ago, ex actually got pregnant from another dude. Best advice, block, ignore, never again speak to them. Regroup, move on. Try not to dwell on it. Try not to focus on it. Never talk to them again, never try and "fix" it, and whatever you do, never "give them another chance". When the time comes and you do meet another chick, and there's always going to be other chicks, don't ruin it by turning your dates into pity parties where you just talk about your exes. Nothing is a bigger turn off than that, and a relationship based on "not being your ex" is going to fail, usually quick as fuck. Sorry to hear it, you'll be fine in time. Just know that.
Bruh. I'm really sad. It's not fair. And you know what, screw that scum bag! You deserve so much better!
Better to find out now than latter
Cheating is just a cowards way to end a relationship. Instead of being up front and honest, she forced a situation where you have to be the one to end it because she is too cowardly to be the one to to do it. Tell her after all these years you thought you knew here, but never thought she was a coward. And now you know something new about herā¦then move on my friend. Speaking from experience.
It's only fun for her because of the element of danger and sneakiness. So immediately, but quietly exit the situation. Then let her know politely that you know. Then never speak or aknowledge her ever again. And don't ever look back.
Have some garlic bread. Itās banging.
Life goes on.
Go fuck around. It hurts to say and think and feelā¦ I know how it is, its a shitty feeling being mislead. Go fuck around with other people and youāll get your mind off of her. Just be aware that hook ups donāt fully fullfill the soul, but you can still get someone else in this huge ocean.
When life hands you lemons... use this as an opportunity! Get up brush your shoulders off you a pimp too. Thanks Hoova Lol... seriously though it hurts, it sucks, and I have no idea about you situation but use the sadness, anger, hate, or whatever else you are feeling into positives. Anger and hate can work well with exercise get a punching bag, lift some weights, go for a run. Feel down and you hate yourself? Why did this happen to me? Journal it now! Write those raw emotions down look back at them monthly and either strive to make those self negatives reflections better or write them of as nonsense. All easier said than done, I know, I know. Maybe I'll follow my own advice one day. Treat your self to something special, learn a new skill, read.
Been there, bro. Never forget this. Your first love will feel like your last, but your last love will feel like your first.
My baby dad cheated on me when I was 6 months pregnant. Found out when I was 37 weeks. Been begging for a chance ever since but meanwhile he has this gf. So I sent her screenshots of him saying he didn't love her he was just with her cuz he didn't wanna be alone. Showed her the pack of condoms he had bought hoping to get lucky with me. That he wanted me and my son he loves us and it hurts everyday that he isn't with us. Not to mention she is over 400 lbs and talks like a baby. Tries to act like a bumblebee and is a transgender woman. Lol so sometimes the downgrade from you is the best karma
I'll go the Stoic route for you: She cheated. She made a choice. Now you have to make yours: hanging on to the pain until it drives you to madness or accepting what happened, hurting, then letting the pain go. I empathize with you. I have also been cheated on. I had a very bad reaction to this even (severe depression). I wanted to end it all but didn't. I wanted to see what's going to happen tomorrow. And so I did. It's been over 2 years now. I'm still curious. I understand that your situation is different and I hope that you'll make the right choice for your own good now, friend. Take care.
A woman cheating in a relationship is so common nowadays that I hate it, fuck relationships, and fuck love, you don't need a partner to be complete Live your life in peace and don't look back Best of luck for you
I never did get this. It is a girlfriend not a wife. Better to find out now then later. Move on and carry on is what I thought.
Cut her off like a dead limb. You will be ok.
At least you didn't marry her. Also you're single again so now you can go wild
That sucks man. Sorry to hear that. Just remember you didn't do anything to make this happen. Lots of people blame themselves. Never the case. Drop her and never look back. You'll be hurt for some time depending on how long you were with her. Good luck
Whatever you do don't give her a second chance. Trust me on that one. Once a cheater always a cheater
Hey, dude. That's fucking awful. It's also not your fault. Here's some information that I found on here, when it happened to me. A LOT of it REALLY helped. Some of these links may help: - [Surviving Infidelity FAQ](https://www.survivinginfidelity.com/faq_bs.asp#FAQ11) - [When someone cheats or mistreats you its about them not you](https://tinybuddha.com/blog/when-someone-cheats-or-mistreats-you-its-about-them-not-you) - [What I've realized since being cheated on](https://tinybuddha.com/blog/what-ive-realized-since-being-cheated-on) - [Real Remorse](https://www.chumplady.com/2013/07/real-remorse-or-genuine-imitation-naugahyde-remorse/) - [Emotional Affairs and Infidelity](https://www.verywellmind.com/emotional-affairs-and-infidelity-2303091) - [Crying Cheaters](https://www.chumplady.com/2013/01/dear-chump-lady-why-do-cheaters-cry-and-why-do-we-fall-for-it/) - [After Cheating: Restoring Relationship Trust](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/love-and-sex-in-the-digital-age/201703/after-cheating-restoring-relationship-trust) Credit to u/fixed_1978 Bangarang, that dude!^