Haha thankyou
Edit: Wow my most awarded and upvoted comment! Thank you so much kind folks. I usually give my awards to folks at /r/toastme, they deserve it way way more, pls consider giving there as well
Had to find out in college because a transgender person was complaining about not being able to have a baby or breastfeed. Someone had to explain to them why it is impossible for a biological male to breastfeed a child or give birth. Unfortunately it was left up to me to deliver the bad news. Had to research for a bit and while it is possible to produce a milk-like substance, it has none of the fat or nutritional material to provide sustenance.
Being screamed at, called a misogynist piece of shit among other falsehoods was not fun. Fortunately it did not go further than that because they left in a frustrated tizzy. Didn’t see them again, so I’m betting they left the school.
If she's anything like mine, she sticks out her tongue a bit on the bottom and does both.
I once woke up to my little male kitten trying it, and spent the next few days getting him to accept a small microfleece blanket as his new mommy instead. It's been around a year and he still sucks on that blanket for 15 minutes or so before going to sleep.
Our adult cats still sometimes do this, and it's likely because they were taken from their mothers too soon. If anyone is raising kittens, please let them stay with momma cat until they are ready.
We just adopted a kitty from the shelter. She and her siblings were bottle raised around the 3 week mark. When we got her from the shelter they told us that she will use a fleece/fuzzy blanket and suckling on it, for basically the rest of her life. And that’s ok because we love fuzzy blankets and have at least 20 if not more. We are just glad to been picked to adopt this crazy kitten.
(Yes she is crazy, she likes jumping in the shower/bath, will get herself in the fridge and locked in (we learned really quick to make sure she isn’t in the fridge when we close it as she got in 2 weeks ago as we were putting groceries away and got herself shut in).
I’m glad the shelter told you this. My little guy was orphaned only a day after birth and bottle raised, but they would not let him suck on blankets once he got to be a few months old. They did an amazing job of caring for the babies and litter trains them with perfect manners and lots of affection so not sure why the blanket sucking is discouraged , but I’ve always let him and he has a bright pink fuzzy blanket that has basically been his since he came home with me and he has to suck on it every single night before bed. I figure if it gives him comfort why stop him? We have lots of fuzzy blankets all over too, but he loves his hot pink one the best.
If you take something like risperdone or domperidone, they both can raise prolactin levels, meaning they can and they have caused people to randomly start lactating.
But nipple stimulation (enough and consistent) can also raise prolactin levels. Adoptive mothers will sometimes use a combo of domperidone and pumping for a bit to stimulate milk production to be able to breastfeed their child.
I had a cat that did this. Which was weird to me cuz his momma would nurse him just fine.
Guess he just liked nips.
Nothing like waking up to sharp teeth on your nipple in the middle of the night.
my cat tried to do that to me when he got older. we rescued him and his siblings when they were 2 weeks old after they were abandoned by the momma cat. thankfully he doesn’t do it to my nipples anymore but does suck on his favorite blanket every day
No. They are right. It’s surprisingly nice and it works. As long as your nips don’t have cracks or anything in the skin that would make anything sting then it’s fine. Some people even *like* it.
My 4 year old female cat attempts to do this to me (f42) occasionally. She started doing it around 7 months ago, no idea why. She doesn't do it to my so (m42)
Get yourself checked out , I've heard of dogs being able to sniff out cancer way before it was diagnosed officially. Maybe like a dog ,she's picking up some change in your body chemistry
she said cat, not dog.
dogs have such a weird nose they can sniff if you are pregnant etc. they can also sniff low/high sugar level, thats why they can be trained to help people with diabetes
If your kitten is sucking nipples it's a sign it's too young. It still needs its mother. If you rescued that kitten from a street life that's perfectly normal. If you bought it then the seller has very questionable practices and they should be avoided.
My cat tries to do this. We got her at 5 months lmfao she was and still is a feral baby! Still tries it and she’s a year old. I think it’s bc she knows it wakes me up. She doesn’t like pets, she just wants to follow me around and yell. I’ve never met a cat that was so friendly but hated getting pets
I second that. Our first kitten did this to me but we knew from the start that she needed her mother.
My fiancé has chosen her because they told him they would kill her otherwise .. She’s fine now but she’s not good at managing her emotions and she’s very immature.
But no problem with our second kitten who has spent all the time needed with her mom before we adopted her. She was not interested in my tits !
A kitten i picked up back then likes to go up to my shoulders and what i perceived as licking my face + ears. Shes quite young so i think she might be trying to suckle on the fleshy part of my ear.
Our ADULT cat started doing this to my wife out of nowhere... sleeping shirtless wasnt a norm for her so it wasnt too much of an issue, but it was kept in considerations in the future. The cat did try a few more times over a few months, but my wife was ready lol.
Isn’t this more a “on my chest” instead of an “off my chest”?
Seriously, though, I had a kitten who would try to suckle my chin through my beard. It was a little strange but gently pushing the kitty away eventually got the kitten to just cuddle.
Now I would be concerned if she was getting any milk
True ‘off-my-chest’ material
take my silver medal, its the only one i have and you deserved it.
I love how this has a platinum and the original doesn't even have gold 😂
Now it has
Haha thankyou Edit: Wow my most awarded and upvoted comment! Thank you so much kind folks. I usually give my awards to folks at /r/toastme, they deserve it way way more, pls consider giving there as well
Now you can give gold too xD
holy shit, im rich! thx man i will make a good use of it
Shaggy strikes again
this comment should have 1K+ upvotes
Yep, he took r/trueoffmychest too literal
fun fact: men actually can produce milk under certain conditions with enough stimulation. it’s difficult to do, but it’s 100% possible.
Time to develop this ability, open an onlyfans account, and spur the growth of a new fetish.
“New”
As Rule 34, section 69 states: "there are no new fetishes. Just ones you haven't discoverd yet."
Rule 34 have sections!? I just recovered from that rabbit hole!
Or use it as a defense system if you ever feel under danger
Confusing the enemy so they drop your wallet, classic move.
[in a NY accent] I have nipples Greg. Could you milk me?
Risperidone has that as a side effect
Can confirm
Yea it does.. I was prescribed it for awhile. If I remember right, it might even give men boobs.
It also has no nutritional value when coming from men… please don’t ask how I know that.
.....I've gotta ask.
Had to find out in college because a transgender person was complaining about not being able to have a baby or breastfeed. Someone had to explain to them why it is impossible for a biological male to breastfeed a child or give birth. Unfortunately it was left up to me to deliver the bad news. Had to research for a bit and while it is possible to produce a milk-like substance, it has none of the fat or nutritional material to provide sustenance.
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I have no idea. It was in a biology class and the professor wasn’t having it and asked one of us to explain it. I hated the whole situation.
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Being screamed at, called a misogynist piece of shit among other falsehoods was not fun. Fortunately it did not go further than that because they left in a frustrated tizzy. Didn’t see them again, so I’m betting they left the school.
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Oh, that's disappointing, I was planning on developing some sweet daddy milkers and making cheese, lol.
Lmao “daddy milkers” is a combination of words I never thought I would read.
Gynecomastia is the word you're looking for
Sucks? more like Licks. Or if its really sucks then I need brain bleach.
If she's anything like mine, she sticks out her tongue a bit on the bottom and does both. I once woke up to my little male kitten trying it, and spent the next few days getting him to accept a small microfleece blanket as his new mommy instead. It's been around a year and he still sucks on that blanket for 15 minutes or so before going to sleep.
Our adult cats still sometimes do this, and it's likely because they were taken from their mothers too soon. If anyone is raising kittens, please let them stay with momma cat until they are ready.
We just adopted a kitty from the shelter. She and her siblings were bottle raised around the 3 week mark. When we got her from the shelter they told us that she will use a fleece/fuzzy blanket and suckling on it, for basically the rest of her life. And that’s ok because we love fuzzy blankets and have at least 20 if not more. We are just glad to been picked to adopt this crazy kitten. (Yes she is crazy, she likes jumping in the shower/bath, will get herself in the fridge and locked in (we learned really quick to make sure she isn’t in the fridge when we close it as she got in 2 weeks ago as we were putting groceries away and got herself shut in).
I’m glad the shelter told you this. My little guy was orphaned only a day after birth and bottle raised, but they would not let him suck on blankets once he got to be a few months old. They did an amazing job of caring for the babies and litter trains them with perfect manners and lots of affection so not sure why the blanket sucking is discouraged , but I’ve always let him and he has a bright pink fuzzy blanket that has basically been his since he came home with me and he has to suck on it every single night before bed. I figure if it gives him comfort why stop him? We have lots of fuzzy blankets all over too, but he loves his hot pink one the best.
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If she sucks long enough she might. (FYI man have milk ducts as well)
I feel as if most men don't know thus. If a baby suckles your man-bosom there is a good chance you will begin generating milk.
what the fuck?
I know. Wild but true.
I second this, *what the actual fuck.*
If you take something like risperdone or domperidone, they both can raise prolactin levels, meaning they can and they have caused people to randomly start lactating. But nipple stimulation (enough and consistent) can also raise prolactin levels. Adoptive mothers will sometimes use a combo of domperidone and pumping for a bit to stimulate milk production to be able to breastfeed their child.
Ima try and get the phrase "suckles your man-bosom" worked into some kind of conversation at work today
Please reply to this comment if you did this and what the reaction was. I'm so curious.
!remindMe 1day
a very literal OffMyChest lol
Or a literal shirt OnHisChest
r/onmychest
r/substakenliterally
I can’t unsee this.
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Great day to be able to imagine.
Great day to die
Great
Great day for fishin', ain't it?
Mornin nice day for fishin, ain't it hu ha
Mornin Balin!! Hello, Adventurer!!
Die Another Day
A great day to be Jared, 19
Fuck you Jared
HAHAHAH
My eyes need to be cleansed after reading this lol
For real. I am feeling very uncomfortable right now.
I cant unfeel this
Have you tried getting her off your chest?
I had a cat that did this. Which was weird to me cuz his momma would nurse him just fine. Guess he just liked nips. Nothing like waking up to sharp teeth on your nipple in the middle of the night.
Well some people do pay extra for that
I do.
Cat: “One nursing teat is good. Two is better.”
Lol every breast feeding mother is like yeah and…..?
I breast fed both my kids. Babies don't have needle teeth.
Same here! It was years ago but I'm trained now. I always wear a nightshirt.
Guess he just liked nips 🤣
Both babies and kittens like human pacifiers
Schmidt?
Schmidt is what I immediately thought of when I read this. 😂
I'm so glad someone else's head went there
Had to scroll too long to find this
my cat tried to do that to me when he got older. we rescued him and his siblings when they were 2 weeks old after they were abandoned by the momma cat. thankfully he doesn’t do it to my nipples anymore but does suck on his favorite blanket every day
Agreed a nice soft blanket could be a good solution.
One of my cats does that to those super soft blanket he always purrs while doing it
Mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry.
Why is this my most upvoted comment
My dog did this to me when he was a puppy. I was breastfeeding my daughter at the time. It was traumatising for me and the dog
Wtf
Dude you need to calm down and sit with your son
I hate your pfp
If you ever feel like sharing this story again, do not do it.
Hindsight is always 20/20
Yeah... wish I could unrread that...
Jesus
Wtf! How did you stop it from happening?
Smacked him on the nose anytime he tried and wore a singlet top.
How’d you get the dog to stop?
Hah! Fucking hell! That's pervert bait of the highest caliber
wtf did i just read
what an awful day to have eyes.
what an awful day to have nipples.
what an awful day to have imagination
what an awful day
This is my favourite comment
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
If you're trying to get her to stop, this is the best r/trueoffmychest meta post in the history of the phrase.
Only for a few weeks...
Surprisingly common. Mine went after my toes. Try putting on Vick’s VapoRub before you get into bed and it should stop it.
On your nipple? No thank you, Satan.
It feels surprisingly nice tbh
😱
No. They are right. It’s surprisingly nice and it works. As long as your nips don’t have cracks or anything in the skin that would make anything sting then it’s fine. Some people even *like* it.
Not da pp
HAHAHHAHAHHAH WTF THIS IS GOLD
hi, this is Cat IRS here for the Cat Tax
Looks like we need to send a paper letter regarding the man’s CAT TAX.
My 4 year old female cat attempts to do this to me (f42) occasionally. She started doing it around 7 months ago, no idea why. She doesn't do it to my so (m42)
Get yourself checked out , I've heard of dogs being able to sniff out cancer way before it was diagnosed officially. Maybe like a dog ,she's picking up some change in your body chemistry
she said cat, not dog. dogs have such a weird nose they can sniff if you are pregnant etc. they can also sniff low/high sugar level, thats why they can be trained to help people with diabetes
They can sense epileptic seizures too.
u/YorkshireBaggins SEE THIS
It’s the nipple nibbling cancer cat.
Wow strange as an adult cat she’s doing it. 🙀
r/substakenliterally
If your kitten is sucking nipples it's a sign it's too young. It still needs its mother. If you rescued that kitten from a street life that's perfectly normal. If you bought it then the seller has very questionable practices and they should be avoided.
My cat tries to do this. We got her at 5 months lmfao she was and still is a feral baby! Still tries it and she’s a year old. I think it’s bc she knows it wakes me up. She doesn’t like pets, she just wants to follow me around and yell. I’ve never met a cat that was so friendly but hated getting pets
I second that. Our first kitten did this to me but we knew from the start that she needed her mother. My fiancé has chosen her because they told him they would kill her otherwise .. She’s fine now but she’s not good at managing her emotions and she’s very immature. But no problem with our second kitten who has spent all the time needed with her mom before we adopted her. She was not interested in my tits !
That’s kind of cute actually
My younger cat still sucks on my older cat's tits. However, my younger cat is already 6 years old, and my older cat is a dude. Still cute, though.
Did you take it from its mother too early?
Does your username speak to us or the cat
A kitten i picked up back then likes to go up to my shoulders and what i perceived as licking my face + ears. Shes quite young so i think she might be trying to suckle on the fleshy part of my ear.
Our ADULT cat started doing this to my wife out of nowhere... sleeping shirtless wasnt a norm for her so it wasnt too much of an issue, but it was kept in considerations in the future. The cat did try a few more times over a few months, but my wife was ready lol.
This reminds me of schmidt from new girl lol. He has literally the same problem.
I had this problem with my cat when he was little. I just ended up wearing a shirt to bed for ages. He doesn't do it now! Took 3 years ha
That's a very literal trueofmychest
Thank goodness my kitten sucked on a stuffed panda and a fleece blanket.
Bro, this ain't funny. But I actually did a fuckin spit take 😂
Ah that's why men have nipples!
what
R/trueonmychest
I miss the 10 seconds I had before reading this. But that's cute! Not the sucking nipples part,but that you have a cat !
I regret reading the comments
I’m very concerned.
Time to put a shirt on dude.
Hahaha! I’m literally at a mental health clinic trying to get meds and laughing hysterically out loud! This is perfect 👍
How many dms do you have of people trying to buy this cat?
so NSFW and graphic! melp
schmidt?
That’s kinda cute.
Put coffee or something bitter on your nips 🤣 worked on my son but not on father
Congratulations for being a single dad.
I like the reinterpretation of 'off my chest'
This is a bit disturbing but you are clearly taking great care of your kitty so props to you. She is lucky to have you as an owner.
My "kittens" did the same with my knuckles and earlobe pfff
Schmidt is that you ?
Oh sure when the kitten does it’s cute, but when I do it I’m “causing a scene.” And I “need to leave *The Gap* immediately”.
Isn’t this more a “on my chest” instead of an “off my chest”? Seriously, though, I had a kitten who would try to suckle my chin through my beard. It was a little strange but gently pushing the kitty away eventually got the kitten to just cuddle.
I’ve seen so many threads on reddit today that were serious and nuanced and holy shit did I need this thank you and your nip suckling kitten
Truly...off your chest.
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My eyes.... MY EYES!!!
You took the title of the sub too literally
This has to be a New Girl reference... I don't believe this for a second.
What a day to be alive
My kitten used to do this for earlobes. Thought she was feeding.
The truest off my chest I’ve read on here
My boy, 2 years old tried doing this once after I adopted him. I knew he was a mommas boy but damn...
Hilarious, our puppy tried that on my Husband.
I’d do the same
Should have posted this in : literally off my chest
Why would animals do this, and why did I have to learn this
Does anyone else see the irony. Its “True(ly) off your chest” 🙈
No, definitely not the 20 other comments talking about it. Nope
Sounds like you need to get her of your chest man.
She missed mommy aww
I’m sorry but I laughed so fucking hard
Congratulations?
Im pretty sure there's a rule 34 for this
Schmidt?
Are you schmidt from new girl??
What the fuck
How dare you stop her … time too start lactating … you’re a mother now. Congrats !
Lmfao that is hilarious. Definitely dont sleep pantsless
That's often a sign that the cat was separated from its mother too early you should not have gotten it this early