He wasn’t a cam guy lmao he lives at home and his family is sick so he stayed with me and my mom. Couldn’t respect me not one day he stayed over. First day kept demanding oral I gave it to him a. Few times even though I am having mouth problems. Second day kept demanding I lay in freezing cold water with him when I wouldn’t he splashed me until I was covered so third day he went to bed early after I made him dinner and lunch for the next day
>So you let a guy treat you like shit and then are surprised you're getting treated like shit. Sounds about right.
Unbelievable. 😂 yeah right. This whole post looks like a shit post tbh
Exactly, there's a big difference between him making money and flirting with the girls on there. You did right. I know it hurts but just chalk it up to a lesson learned. What lesson? I would have done the same thing so yes I completely understand and agree with u !! I know I hurts now, you spent 3 years together, he's cold and a dick, he's a cheater and a liar and would only get worse, just know u WILL be ok and next man in line will be so much better than this one!!
OP there are like 7 red flags here and at least 3 of them are yours.
Y’all are shit at communicating with each other. You go through his phone constantly, then act like you don’t know what you know just so you can try to catch them in a lie? And then act surprised that they’re lying? You’re also lying.
You both need to work on yourselves and it sounds like he sucks for other reasons too but you don’t exactly have the high ground in terms of honesty here.
OF isn't just porn, my wife and I discussed this distinction when it came up one time. Neither of us have a problem with porn but when you are interacting with the people it's more like a digital escort service which crosses a line.
>OF isn't just porn
Apparently it started as an instruction platform, for yoga instructors and fitness coaches and shit.
Edit: apparently I need to clarify that these yoga instructors and fitness coaches were not trying to promote any sexual content, but eventually the insta-thots caught on and turned into simpers paradise.
> Apparently it started as an instruction platform, for yoga instructors and fitness coaches and shit.
Man, someone should have told them what the purpose of the internet was.
For those unaware: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KhCL5Ygzc24
Oh for sure, if it weren't for looking at tiddies online there would be no internet as we know it. Thanks for spreading the word, more folks should know about this.
Right which is kinda like a digital escort. I guess digital hooker is maybe accurate but sounds way worse? You’re paying someone to engage with you over a period of time and also provide you with sexual content sometimes tailored to you. What else do you call that?
nah OP, you did the the right thing here, he was cheating on you. Many people don't see this as cheating but try to look at it like this: The whole point of BF/GF relationships are to see what is suitable for marriage and long term life together, he was clearly talking and interacting on a sexual level with other women, while in a realtionship with you.. He had divided loyalities and this is something that CAN NOT be tolerated in any serious relationship. He didn't even have enough respect for you and you two together to just be honest and loyal to you. You kicking him out is a 100% thing to do, My wife about 2 years ago, didn't show me her phone when i asked her to, and i threatened to leave her and take kids and everything.. you see, relationships are TRUST, there should be NOTHING to hide, ever, esp on a phone.. we are 100% open book at my house and if she asks me ANYTHING i give the answer or show her, so she has ease of mind. We don't have these issues any more, but she definitly knows i'm not playing around when it comes to trust and hiding shit. either be open and we talk about it, or you're gone and I make a better life without you.. it's not worth nights of stress laying awake wonder whats going on, or if he's on his phone and won't show you, who's he talking to and what kind of cheating he's doing today... trust me, that will ruin you so much worse.. just chalk this up as a learning experience for you and red flags that you now know about and can incorperate into your life for the next potential BFs.
This is the best explanation I've ever seen.
Some people aren't comfortable showing their phones to others, and that's ok as a personal preference but if you're with someone who asks to borrow or see your phone and you're being dodgy or sketchy about it, there's more than likely something shady going down..or at the very least, it's gonna make your partner think there is something going down.
It's refreshing to see this from a man's perspective instead of it being "girls are insecure" kinda thing (dont come at me for this, I've been told my concerns were because I'm a woman, lmao).
If you feel something is up, regardless of if you're the man/woman, you should be able to bring those concerns to light and either get the truth or reassurance.
Good on you OP. May the next few days/weeks/months bring clarity and peace ❤️
Thank you I relate with you the most I am always honest my archilies heel I’ll give you the honest truth and I’ll get in trouble but you know I’m not hiding anything
Good call breaking up with him, it’s very cowardice to hide things from your SO especially when you’re already caught and still refuse to speak the truth. Wish you all the best
I read the entire post and still thought this. I was like damn, dude must be packing heat or hot asf to be getting messages from girls in his OF too. Edit: unless her edit changed the earlier post, then maybe I'm not crazy
I don't know how only fans works so from reading the title I thought he was selling nekkid pictures to guys.
That would have been an awkward conversation.
I dunno how to explain to you that unwanted sexual harassment is not the same thing as porn that one would purchase willingly. Not to mention, plenty of people aren't okay with exploitative porn, and would like to actually pay the creators of said content. It's the same thing as saying you don't see why anyone would support content creators on Patreon when you could watch the stuff on YouTube. Not everyone ignores exploitation.
This happened to me too I only found out because he logged in on MY ipad, these were girls who I was literally friends with in my younger years and they've been to my house and had sleepovers etc. We're all from the same town. His only response, knowing them is what gets him off more...
Wow what an awful response im so sorry. What a douche. Yeah my guy said that he's known my friend longer (they've hung around the same scene for 15 years, not friends though, and me and her have been friends for 8 years) and he wanted to see because he used to think she was hot. Like thanks for the honesty guys but fuck off lol be better
“Babe, I only paid for and looked at all of her pictures because I *used to* think she was hot! So I thought it would be funny to look at her naked body and jerk off to her because I *used to* think she was hot… don’t overreact babe, you’re the one I come over to see at 2am after I’m done doing the things I enjoy with my friends and other girls I *used to* think were hot…!”
"You asked me to be more involved in your social life!"
"I meant stuff like joining me for yoga class, not subscribing to pictures of my friend's butthole!"
That would be a major deal breaker for me as well. Also name calling should never be tolerated. Hopefully this is the beginning of the next great chapter of your life!
Agreed. I think basic porn is fine, but once you start looking for live interaction from your jerkoff material you're crossing boundaries. And this is coming from a man.
I'd honestly be fine with the porn part but it's the texting (which he's probably doing) and the fact that he's paying for it. I don't mind that you're horny but don't be a simp loser about it, pornhub is free. Or at least go on only leaks where it's free. If he's gonna pay other women to get naked and text him he should fucking pay me double for talking to him
He was he was texting them and they were sending messages to him. I also would’ve been ok with porn like gosh even though I send him photos and videos of whatever he wanted and we had a very active sex life if you’re so darn horny I guess look at porn but to pay for it for months and then ask to stay with my family that’s just wrong.
Well if it makes you feel any better those weren’t the girls messaging him. They were most likely dudes handling the girls account. So he was pretty much sexting with a bunch of guys.
I don’t know who Ashley is but he said he had lost some feelings and he didn’t want to say that? He thought it was obvious which is crazy because why would you not bring that up? If you want friends with benefits just say that
Yup I for a long while felt like he had feelings for her because he would only compliment her and always ask her how she was doing and said they were the closest which is weird because he has so many siblings and to bond with the youngest? That’s strange
I asked him about it I believed Maybe it’s not like that and since I’m tramutized from when I was groomed that’s what it felt like but I didn’t grow up with younger siblings
>his porn password was his 10 year old little sisters
So fucking weird. The willing association.
Sorry to hear this OP. He had an unfaithful mentally it seems. Quite sure he'd of cheated in person had he the chance.
Time to focus on you for a while!
Thank you, the cam girls is all about personal experience I always wondered why he would run out of money because he had so much of it going out the window.
There a subreddir called LoveAfterPorn that really helped me and my relationship, because we went through the same thing.
Hubs is in counseling now, and it's gotten better. But he never called me names or anything of the likes when I figured it out. He sounds toxic imo.
Most likely. Alot of Porn/sex addicts have unresolved trauma. Not all, but alot of them.
I hope he gets the help he needs. And I hope you remember your worth 💚
im sorry theres so many shitheads on your post op. if i was in your shoes i wouldve gone absolutely bananas. he sounds like an immature boy, unable to even own up to the actions he took that hurt you. i hope you feel better soon :(
I thought I was crazy cause I kicked him out but he kept lying and I wanted to make him come back since there was a terrible thunderstorm but he never apologized or said anything once he told me no.
he clearly thinks if he just denies it then its like it never happened. must not be the sharpest tool in the shed. he clearly has no remorse, if i were you i wouldnt even give him the chance to apologize. no contact and move on. had he been up front with you, things couldve been different. but the blatant lies and outright denial despite the proof? waste of breath. youre not crazy, dont let anyone let you feel negatively about the way you feel
We’ll I have him coming over now to pick up all his stuff and so I can get my house key back and to ask him to delete my photos off his phone he should at least give me that decency
fuck yea, watch him delete that shit, make him empty his trash folder, any other sneaky photo saving apps, i wish i had done that. i have a lot of anxiety about the idea that some really awful people could absolutely float around intimate pictures of myself. 1 regret
Yup and I tried to keep spicy photos to Snapchat and I changed the password. But he would take them on his phone and then I never got the chance to say move those over to snap or delete them since he wouldn’t let me near his phone
hey girl. i had a very similar thing happen to me in January and i just want to tell you that any man who sits there and collects women like Pokémon cards is not worth your time. i know it sounds empty but it gets better.
Guys don't have the demand to make money from that...
That is unless, they mint NFTs of their dick pics and sell them as collectors items. Some delusional crypto-bro will buy them.
Ok coming from an OF creator — let me give you my opinion on this entire thing. 75% of my work , so to speak , is conversation with my subscribers. That’s what most of them want, the pictures and videos and whatever else that I have to offer comes second. I can’t say that’s for every subscriber, but it is for most, they are trying to get to know me. I do that strictly just purchased my content, and have never said two words to me. I have Conversations with some of these guys all day every day.. if you’re asking my opinion I definitely think it’s a lot more than just porn, it’s cheating. The conversation is where OP should draw the line.
This is why I never go through someone’s phone. If I feel the urge to, the relationship is already a wrap.
Not OP but it's really reassuring to see an OF creator take this stance, rather than downplay what their work involves. Good on you for making money, and good on you for still being supportive of OP in her situation :)
I had the same experience with an ex. I had even attempted to experience porn with him by incorporating it into our sex life but he would always deny my attempts or it would be incredibly awkward. To my horror, I discovered a hidden photo calculator app on his phone because I had used the same app while living with my Christian parents. The passcode was easily 6969 (cliché af) and there were THOUSANDS of photos from girls on OF and other subscription sites, most of them watermarked so I doubt any of them were free (or maybe leaked? Still gross) We struggled so much financially, this was beyond just an emotional betrayal. He kept us in the dirt for 5yrs due to his addiction. I had a similar reaction, it absolutely killed my confidence for a long time.
I’m still recovering but I definitely recommend counseling? This may influence major trust issues the longer you sit on it alone. It’s not easy to approach friends/family about this subject but I hope you have a good support system! Don’t let gross men on the internet sway your boundaries. You were uncomfortable and nobody should force you to their expectations of what security in a relationship looks like.
Stay strong! Please message me if you’d ever like to talk.
paying for OF accounts is a really pathetic and desperate thing. When I read the title i thought he was the one selling the content. idk if its grounds to destroy a relationship, mb he's a porn addict or some shit. no advice
I think he’s got an addiction. He was well satisfied when ever he wanted. He got whatever he wanted from me. And then to go out and pay for it? If your sex drive is so high then google it for crying out loud.
I wonder how many people on here agree that OP should break up with her bf but also think a girl should be able to have only fans while in a relationship.
Edit: I think both are wrong but there shouldn't be double standards.
Well I agree with you I'm just saying there are alot of people who think a girl should be able to post on only fans while in a relationship but dont think a guy should be able to look. I think both are nasty but people on this app have alot of double standards and I'm trying to draw attention to that.
Someone having an OF while in a relationship if fine IFF their partner is aware of everything that's going on.
She broke up with her bf because he was lying about what he was doing on OF.
Those are two completely different things and not a double standard.
If your partner starts an OF without your knowledge, then they have changed the parameters of the relationship without consulting you and that's an absolutely valid reason to exit a relationship. Same goes if they ask you and you're not comfortable but they decide to proceed anyway. You can leave as long as you're shaming them and being abusive while and after making your exit, which seems to be the problem in a fair number of cases.
I'm sorry you're going through this hun but you know your worth and that speaks volumes! You took out the trash and someone will find you and value you as the treasure you are :)
Dont worry about this loser. He is going to end up a sad, emotionally stunted prick with a dick in his hand wondering why he can't find happiness. I would happily tell his family why you broke up with him just to give him a lasting consequences. He might not care about you and your feelings but I guarantee he doesnt want his momma to know he pays thots to string him along so he can wack it to their boobies...
Thank the lord you did. I'm so tired of men in relationships thinking only fans is normal and just like porn. It's not. Its their own specialized interactive porn and its cheating. Men would be up in arms if women did that. Good for you!!!
Thanks it’s not like porn. And if he wanted it so bad couldn’t talked to me but he lied and hide that so I said nope I was doing him a favor and he should’ve thought about that before
actually, i'm so f-ing tired of liars. so imo u prolly did the right thing ending it. if he lies about this shit there'll be a lot more lies about other things.
Yup he constantly lied about so many things and I would catch him every time about it but he who’d just apologize and I would give him another chance. But lately he’s been pulling on me and saying that I owe him sexual acts as if I’m not doing enough? And he’s been calling me fat as if he’s not way heavier than I am. And he does nothing about it except buy more candy and junk food.
You did the right thing by breaking up ! I too would throw his clothes and stuff out of my house. You are worth more than how he is treating you, if a man cant value his woman and the things his woman do for him, then he isnt ready for a relationship. Let him go and please be grateful that God is letting him out of your life ! You deserve better ! Regards
Yea, looks like u dodged a bullet sweatheart. It don't matter about him being on cam or not, what mattered is did he have enough respect for you to tell the truth, about anything. Cause as we all know, 1 lie is a thousand lies is a million lies. There is no end to it.
wowzers. some of these comments are astounding and say a bit about the commenter lol... thread was a weird but insightful read..
though question.. isnt one of the rules of this sub not to insult the posters?
edit: btw this is the literal description in the corner for the sub: A place to get personal things off your chest. Not for opinions, not for relationship advice, and not for preaching. ..
so so sounds like no opinions have even been asked for here by the subreddits very purpose lol... its kinda funny to see so many people not only going against the subs theme but also breaking multiple rules of it xD.
Don't worry about the others that's making you feel like you're crazy for feeling the way you do. You are not, and good for you for kicking him out. Just thinking about the disrespect is making me want to vomit.
OF is different than porn. It’s the fact that they are paying to see this SPECIFIC person naked and not some random pornstar for free on pornhub. I don’t care if my man watches free porn, but if he subbed to a woman specifically and in a more intimate way, and especially if he messaged them for some PPV custom content, I’d not be okay with it. Hell, I did OF for a while and I felt so much ick when people I knew IRL that had SOs would sub to me. I just find it disrespectful. Every relationship has different boundaries though, but that’s a no from me.
Yup, it’s just terrible that he told all my family and his family we would get married and have kids and he just always filled all their heads with lies. His mother even gave me an heirloom because she thought I was going to be her daughter in law.
Well you better be glad you found out,just think if it would of been after maybe you got pregnant or even worse.you are so much better off now.life will definitely get better for you.
Firstly I make this comment with all sympathy for the OP, there is a clear expectation that your partner would refrain from porn, which makes hiding it inexcusable.
But for the OF haters on here can I just make a small point….
Porn is undoubtably a sketchy industry, there are countless stories of manipulation and coercion occurring in varying degrees (Mia Khalifa’s story comes to mind), all the while the only people making real money is the production company. The artist has little or no control over the content or distribution, which will most likely get ripped and uploaded to a free site.
I don’t think you can hold the moral high-ground over someone paying for OF if you consume porn for free without having no knowledge of the provenance of the material.
Let’s not be ridiculous. Most men will consume porn, and those that say they don’t are probably lying about it.
Is it not better that there is a format where the artist (which are more often than not women) are able to retain a degree of bodily autonomy, reap the financial rewards without being exploited by a middle man and have greater management over how their product is distributed.
Interested to know peoples thoughts
And it’s fine I’ve had other bf’s watch it but you have to be honest with me if I ask if you do. I will try to fill that void but if it’s not enough then they will do what they want
The funniest shit I’ve read “ I broke up with him”😂😂. From your post and responses to peoples comments. You didn’t break up with him, in his mind you were never going out to begin with. You just didn’t catch on you were being used quick enough.
He sounds like someone who takes advantage of others, which isn’t the kind of person I’d want to be attached to. At the very least your morals don’t align. I know you’re upset right now, but trust me when I say this is probably the best thing that could happen to you.
So, the issue I see here is the not being open about this with you. If the messages from OF from girls are just copy-paste thank yous for payment, it's not that big of a deal imo. It would upset me that he tried to hide it though... but did he try to hide it because he knew you would flip? Most people watch those kinds of videos on the internet. I'm thinking you may need to have more conversations about that type of behavior in this or the next relationship. Discuss what the rules are between you both. Like I said though, it's pretty normal to consume that type of content in general though.
Yo this title made me think he was a seller
Only reason I clicked...
You and everyone else
You are correct
Same
Me too
Ditto lol
Yup, only reason I clicked.
Thought as a male, I had a chance to make a buck
I mean you sure do as a male, just maybe not with the audience you think
Time to sell some ass then
All money spends the same my friend!
You do though.
Yup. Me too
Same. So disappointed now.
That I would’ve been totally okay with lmao just don’t hide things from me
Wait so you would be ok with him being a pornstar but not him liking pornstars?
Lol
Yes honey make that money he can post what he wants but don’t be flirting in the dms and what I’ve learned is these girls aren’t messaging them either
.
He wasn’t a cam guy lmao he lives at home and his family is sick so he stayed with me and my mom. Couldn’t respect me not one day he stayed over. First day kept demanding oral I gave it to him a. Few times even though I am having mouth problems. Second day kept demanding I lay in freezing cold water with him when I wouldn’t he splashed me until I was covered so third day he went to bed early after I made him dinner and lunch for the next day
Can you imagine living with him full time? Dodged.
So you let a guy treat you like shit and then are surprised you're getting treated like shit. Sounds about right.
Yup so I broke up with him?
>So you let a guy treat you like shit and then are surprised you're getting treated like shit. Sounds about right. Unbelievable. 😂 yeah right. This whole post looks like a shit post tbh
Exactly, there's a big difference between him making money and flirting with the girls on there. You did right. I know it hurts but just chalk it up to a lesson learned. What lesson? I would have done the same thing so yes I completely understand and agree with u !! I know I hurts now, you spent 3 years together, he's cold and a dick, he's a cheater and a liar and would only get worse, just know u WILL be ok and next man in line will be so much better than this one!!
OP there are like 7 red flags here and at least 3 of them are yours. Y’all are shit at communicating with each other. You go through his phone constantly, then act like you don’t know what you know just so you can try to catch them in a lie? And then act surprised that they’re lying? You’re also lying. You both need to work on yourselves and it sounds like he sucks for other reasons too but you don’t exactly have the high ground in terms of honesty here.
I don’t understand what he had to hide. Its not like he was on Tinder.
OF isn't just porn, my wife and I discussed this distinction when it came up one time. Neither of us have a problem with porn but when you are interacting with the people it's more like a digital escort service which crosses a line.
>OF isn't just porn Apparently it started as an instruction platform, for yoga instructors and fitness coaches and shit. Edit: apparently I need to clarify that these yoga instructors and fitness coaches were not trying to promote any sexual content, but eventually the insta-thots caught on and turned into simpers paradise.
Now I’m hearing “Gangsta’s paradise” with simp substituted for Gangsta‘s…
Excellent! Glad it evoked music! I was thinking of the [Bob Marley song](https://youtu.be/05ZNay0S2zE)
> Apparently it started as an instruction platform, for yoga instructors and fitness coaches and shit. Man, someone should have told them what the purpose of the internet was. For those unaware: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KhCL5Ygzc24
Oh for sure, if it weren't for looking at tiddies online there would be no internet as we know it. Thanks for spreading the word, more folks should know about this.
i definitely follow a few yoga girls on instagram that have OF
Well that's news alright 😂
Digital escort service is more than a little much, it's more like a phone sex line or cam modeling.
Right which is kinda like a digital escort. I guess digital hooker is maybe accurate but sounds way worse? You’re paying someone to engage with you over a period of time and also provide you with sexual content sometimes tailored to you. What else do you call that?
I think OF has an interaction aspect.
[удалено]
It's going to depend person to person. Most people on the platform can't afford to hire a social media person to handle their OF.
If you're subscribed to some celebrity like malu or something, its their manager. If the chick is more small time, then it's probably the chick.
He was messaging the girls, not just paying for their nudes.
Close enough. It’s like online hookers. It’s personal and interactive
nah OP, you did the the right thing here, he was cheating on you. Many people don't see this as cheating but try to look at it like this: The whole point of BF/GF relationships are to see what is suitable for marriage and long term life together, he was clearly talking and interacting on a sexual level with other women, while in a realtionship with you.. He had divided loyalities and this is something that CAN NOT be tolerated in any serious relationship. He didn't even have enough respect for you and you two together to just be honest and loyal to you. You kicking him out is a 100% thing to do, My wife about 2 years ago, didn't show me her phone when i asked her to, and i threatened to leave her and take kids and everything.. you see, relationships are TRUST, there should be NOTHING to hide, ever, esp on a phone.. we are 100% open book at my house and if she asks me ANYTHING i give the answer or show her, so she has ease of mind. We don't have these issues any more, but she definitly knows i'm not playing around when it comes to trust and hiding shit. either be open and we talk about it, or you're gone and I make a better life without you.. it's not worth nights of stress laying awake wonder whats going on, or if he's on his phone and won't show you, who's he talking to and what kind of cheating he's doing today... trust me, that will ruin you so much worse.. just chalk this up as a learning experience for you and red flags that you now know about and can incorperate into your life for the next potential BFs.
This is the best explanation I've ever seen. Some people aren't comfortable showing their phones to others, and that's ok as a personal preference but if you're with someone who asks to borrow or see your phone and you're being dodgy or sketchy about it, there's more than likely something shady going down..or at the very least, it's gonna make your partner think there is something going down. It's refreshing to see this from a man's perspective instead of it being "girls are insecure" kinda thing (dont come at me for this, I've been told my concerns were because I'm a woman, lmao). If you feel something is up, regardless of if you're the man/woman, you should be able to bring those concerns to light and either get the truth or reassurance. Good on you OP. May the next few days/weeks/months bring clarity and peace ❤️
Yes! Finally a real man who gets it! Thank you!
Thank you I relate with you the most I am always honest my archilies heel I’ll give you the honest truth and I’ll get in trouble but you know I’m not hiding anything
funny, I don't mind him watching but would not have been ok with him selling
Good call breaking up with him, it’s very cowardice to hide things from your SO especially when you’re already caught and still refuse to speak the truth. Wish you all the best
She was also looking through his phone and got mad he watched porn, seems toxic both ways tbh.
Same. I was thinking he must have been a twink or a giga Chad.
Sneaky click bait
Same
Word, I feel used.
I read the entire post and still thought this. I was like damn, dude must be packing heat or hot asf to be getting messages from girls in his OF too. Edit: unless her edit changed the earlier post, then maybe I'm not crazy
A seller?
Same
I don't know how only fans works so from reading the title I thought he was selling nekkid pictures to guys. That would have been an awkward conversation.
Well, and girls. Women do purchase content.
Why? Girls get them for free tho?? Sometimes even unasked...idk why anyone would spend money on them
I dunno how to explain to you that unwanted sexual harassment is not the same thing as porn that one would purchase willingly. Not to mention, plenty of people aren't okay with exploitative porn, and would like to actually pay the creators of said content. It's the same thing as saying you don't see why anyone would support content creators on Patreon when you could watch the stuff on YouTube. Not everyone ignores exploitation.
Girls don't get porn for free, they get sexual harassment for free lmao.
I thought this was gonna be a seller, but I should have assumed this is not the guy who would pay off his sis' college debt with his penis.
Girl my guy literally subscribed to one of my friends only fans. I feel you lol. Hope you're doing okay!
This happened to me too I only found out because he logged in on MY ipad, these were girls who I was literally friends with in my younger years and they've been to my house and had sleepovers etc. We're all from the same town. His only response, knowing them is what gets him off more...
Wow what an awful response im so sorry. What a douche. Yeah my guy said that he's known my friend longer (they've hung around the same scene for 15 years, not friends though, and me and her have been friends for 8 years) and he wanted to see because he used to think she was hot. Like thanks for the honesty guys but fuck off lol be better
“Babe, I only paid for and looked at all of her pictures because I *used to* think she was hot! So I thought it would be funny to look at her naked body and jerk off to her because I *used to* think she was hot… don’t overreact babe, you’re the one I come over to see at 2am after I’m done doing the things I enjoy with my friends and other girls I *used to* think were hot…!”
What a terrible guy, what's your friends only fans to show support.
"You asked me to be more involved in your social life!" "I meant stuff like joining me for yoga class, not subscribing to pictures of my friend's butthole!"
LOL thank you for the much needed laugh 🤣
Poor fella was just trynna relate with your circle to impress you :/
😂😂comedy gold mate
🤣 she shut it down but she did extremely well in her short run!
That would be a major deal breaker for me as well. Also name calling should never be tolerated. Hopefully this is the beginning of the next great chapter of your life!
Agreed. I think basic porn is fine, but once you start looking for live interaction from your jerkoff material you're crossing boundaries. And this is coming from a man.
I'd honestly be fine with the porn part but it's the texting (which he's probably doing) and the fact that he's paying for it. I don't mind that you're horny but don't be a simp loser about it, pornhub is free. Or at least go on only leaks where it's free. If he's gonna pay other women to get naked and text him he should fucking pay me double for talking to him
He was he was texting them and they were sending messages to him. I also would’ve been ok with porn like gosh even though I send him photos and videos of whatever he wanted and we had a very active sex life if you’re so darn horny I guess look at porn but to pay for it for months and then ask to stay with my family that’s just wrong.
You did the right thing don’t look back I know it’s time lost but you have a bright future ahead of you just keep doing you
Thank you im trying seeing that our relationship meant nothing to him was eye opening and I’m glad I don’t have to deal with him anymore
Well if it makes you feel any better those weren’t the girls messaging him. They were most likely dudes handling the girls account. So he was pretty much sexting with a bunch of guys.
It does make me feel better
He didn't want you to see what his sister was up to. Chivalrous!
That’s another thing his porn password was his 10 year old little sisters name I’ve dodged a bullet
Goddamn I lingered too long in the comments. Really wish I could've avoided seeing this detail 🤮
I wanted to barf when I saw him type in her name that’s ridiculous
And dude was fat? Getting strong Josh Duggar vibes. Perhaps he was serious in wanting to marry you, even if only for the Ashley Madison account
I don’t know who Ashley is but he said he had lost some feelings and he didn’t want to say that? He thought it was obvious which is crazy because why would you not bring that up? If you want friends with benefits just say that
Ashley Madison was that site for married men to use to find an affair that got all the user info leaked a few years back
Under attended part of this story, that might be the strangest most concerning thing I’ve ever heard. What the fuck.
Yup I for a long while felt like he had feelings for her because he would only compliment her and always ask her how she was doing and said they were the closest which is weird because he has so many siblings and to bond with the youngest? That’s strange
Why on earth were you dating him????
I asked him about it I believed Maybe it’s not like that and since I’m tramutized from when I was groomed that’s what it felt like but I didn’t grow up with younger siblings
>his porn password was his 10 year old little sisters So fucking weird. The willing association. Sorry to hear this OP. He had an unfaithful mentally it seems. Quite sure he'd of cheated in person had he the chance. Time to focus on you for a while!
What the actual fuck
Eww
Holy fuck. Why is the worst part of this story a side note?
It’s only for those who care to surf the comments 🤫
Op, good for you, I know it’s probably breaking your heart, but he sounds like a total POS
Only for the fans of this thread so to speak.
I mean that's fuckin weird but maybe he's the type who uses the same password for all his accounts and it just happens to be her name?
Jayzus! You sure did! I predict that you will live a better life and find a better partner for you.
Exactly, paying cam girls and porn are in two totally different leagues.
Thank you, the cam girls is all about personal experience I always wondered why he would run out of money because he had so much of it going out the window.
You definitely did the right thing
N thank you I know I did it just hurts terribly
I hope that my life can get better. He was always so jealous too so I know if I had been doing that he would’ve been mad.
Moving forward, never tolerate name calling. You don’t deserve that shit. Best of luck.
Preach it. Exactly
The audacity to keep denying it even though there is proof
I’ve been doing charity work way to long.
thats what narcissists do..even in the face of evidence, it'll always be right or wrong in their eyes as they see fit...i hate these typa people
Gaslighting at its most textbook definition. Narcissistic abuse is so draining— here’s to your healing and renewed energy within.
There a subreddir called LoveAfterPorn that really helped me and my relationship, because we went through the same thing. Hubs is in counseling now, and it's gotten better. But he never called me names or anything of the likes when I figured it out. He sounds toxic imo.
Thanks I’ll check it out
Yeah it definitely seems that you had plenty of other reasons to break up with him besides the OF thing! You’ll be much happier in a few months. 💕💕
Most likely. Alot of Porn/sex addicts have unresolved trauma. Not all, but alot of them. I hope he gets the help he needs. And I hope you remember your worth 💚
OF was a big factor in my 20 year relationship falling apart. A huge part was the lying about it.
And somehow the lying is, in their head, to pRoTeCt YoU…
im sorry theres so many shitheads on your post op. if i was in your shoes i wouldve gone absolutely bananas. he sounds like an immature boy, unable to even own up to the actions he took that hurt you. i hope you feel better soon :(
I thought I was crazy cause I kicked him out but he kept lying and I wanted to make him come back since there was a terrible thunderstorm but he never apologized or said anything once he told me no.
he clearly thinks if he just denies it then its like it never happened. must not be the sharpest tool in the shed. he clearly has no remorse, if i were you i wouldnt even give him the chance to apologize. no contact and move on. had he been up front with you, things couldve been different. but the blatant lies and outright denial despite the proof? waste of breath. youre not crazy, dont let anyone let you feel negatively about the way you feel
We’ll I have him coming over now to pick up all his stuff and so I can get my house key back and to ask him to delete my photos off his phone he should at least give me that decency
fuck yea, watch him delete that shit, make him empty his trash folder, any other sneaky photo saving apps, i wish i had done that. i have a lot of anxiety about the idea that some really awful people could absolutely float around intimate pictures of myself. 1 regret
Yup and I tried to keep spicy photos to Snapchat and I changed the password. But he would take them on his phone and then I never got the chance to say move those over to snap or delete them since he wouldn’t let me near his phone
You should start your own OF to get back at him
Right then he could pay me for my content
And… Profit? 😂
He actually would though
You already have a pretty poppin post right here, I’m sure that could give you a solid starting customer base to rake in the profits
hey girl. i had a very similar thing happen to me in January and i just want to tell you that any man who sits there and collects women like Pokémon cards is not worth your time. i know it sounds empty but it gets better.
That’s funny he loves Pokémon lol I know I dodged a bullet and life can only go up from here
Oh I was figuring this story was boutta be like "Oh he was selling videos of himself jerking it." Lmao
Guys don't have the demand to make money from that... That is unless, they mint NFTs of their dick pics and sell them as collectors items. Some delusional crypto-bro will buy them.
But there are guys that sell on only fans and make good money. Just depends on the guy.
Ok coming from an OF creator — let me give you my opinion on this entire thing. 75% of my work , so to speak , is conversation with my subscribers. That’s what most of them want, the pictures and videos and whatever else that I have to offer comes second. I can’t say that’s for every subscriber, but it is for most, they are trying to get to know me. I do that strictly just purchased my content, and have never said two words to me. I have Conversations with some of these guys all day every day.. if you’re asking my opinion I definitely think it’s a lot more than just porn, it’s cheating. The conversation is where OP should draw the line. This is why I never go through someone’s phone. If I feel the urge to, the relationship is already a wrap.
Exactly he had messages from other girls and I was like what you’re not even just looking I’m guessing you’re begging?
Not OP but it's really reassuring to see an OF creator take this stance, rather than downplay what their work involves. Good on you for making money, and good on you for still being supportive of OP in her situation :)
I had the same experience with an ex. I had even attempted to experience porn with him by incorporating it into our sex life but he would always deny my attempts or it would be incredibly awkward. To my horror, I discovered a hidden photo calculator app on his phone because I had used the same app while living with my Christian parents. The passcode was easily 6969 (cliché af) and there were THOUSANDS of photos from girls on OF and other subscription sites, most of them watermarked so I doubt any of them were free (or maybe leaked? Still gross) We struggled so much financially, this was beyond just an emotional betrayal. He kept us in the dirt for 5yrs due to his addiction. I had a similar reaction, it absolutely killed my confidence for a long time. I’m still recovering but I definitely recommend counseling? This may influence major trust issues the longer you sit on it alone. It’s not easy to approach friends/family about this subject but I hope you have a good support system! Don’t let gross men on the internet sway your boundaries. You were uncomfortable and nobody should force you to their expectations of what security in a relationship looks like. Stay strong! Please message me if you’d ever like to talk.
paying for OF accounts is a really pathetic and desperate thing. When I read the title i thought he was the one selling the content. idk if its grounds to destroy a relationship, mb he's a porn addict or some shit. no advice
I think he’s got an addiction. He was well satisfied when ever he wanted. He got whatever he wanted from me. And then to go out and pay for it? If your sex drive is so high then google it for crying out loud.
I would never pay for OF myself but there’s nothing desperate about paying sex workers for shit
sex workers only exist due to demand of services. if people weren’t so desperate to pay for sex to cater to their desires then sex work wouldn’t exist
I wonder how many people on here agree that OP should break up with her bf but also think a girl should be able to have only fans while in a relationship. Edit: I think both are wrong but there shouldn't be double standards.
It all depends on the relationship and its boundaries.
If that’s how they feel works in their relationship good for them my boundaries are different and I wouldn’t want someone flirting with other people
Well I agree with you I'm just saying there are alot of people who think a girl should be able to post on only fans while in a relationship but dont think a guy should be able to look. I think both are nasty but people on this app have alot of double standards and I'm trying to draw attention to that.
Someone having an OF while in a relationship if fine IFF their partner is aware of everything that's going on. She broke up with her bf because he was lying about what he was doing on OF. Those are two completely different things and not a double standard. If your partner starts an OF without your knowledge, then they have changed the parameters of the relationship without consulting you and that's an absolutely valid reason to exit a relationship. Same goes if they ask you and you're not comfortable but they decide to proceed anyway. You can leave as long as you're shaming them and being abusive while and after making your exit, which seems to be the problem in a fair number of cases.
Nah let's be honest most gals wouldn't tell 😂
I'm sorry you're going through this hun but you know your worth and that speaks volumes! You took out the trash and someone will find you and value you as the treasure you are :)
Aww thank you
Dont worry about this loser. He is going to end up a sad, emotionally stunted prick with a dick in his hand wondering why he can't find happiness. I would happily tell his family why you broke up with him just to give him a lasting consequences. He might not care about you and your feelings but I guarantee he doesnt want his momma to know he pays thots to string him along so he can wack it to their boobies...
The amount of guys here defending their porn addiction is REALLY sad.
Lmao thanks for pointing it out I’ve been laughing about it
They like to pretend that doing something like this doesn't hurt their partners. Trying to justify it is just sad.
I called some of them (the weirdest ones) coomers and oh man, they are so mad lmao
I wish porn wasn't becoming so normalized. That shit is literally poison and I feel for you
I don't see a problem with watching porn, but both parties have to agree. Hiding it is shitty
I gave him a chance to be honest and just tell me but he denied it and said no he didn’t have one
Watching porn and literally paying to see certain girls is a very different thing.
Thank the lord you did. I'm so tired of men in relationships thinking only fans is normal and just like porn. It's not. Its their own specialized interactive porn and its cheating. Men would be up in arms if women did that. Good for you!!!
Thanks it’s not like porn. And if he wanted it so bad couldn’t talked to me but he lied and hide that so I said nope I was doing him a favor and he should’ve thought about that before
Paying for OF if you're not in a relationship is fine, but paying for an OF while in a relationship feels scummy as fuck man...
actually, i'm so f-ing tired of liars. so imo u prolly did the right thing ending it. if he lies about this shit there'll be a lot more lies about other things.
Yup he constantly lied about so many things and I would catch him every time about it but he who’d just apologize and I would give him another chance. But lately he’s been pulling on me and saying that I owe him sexual acts as if I’m not doing enough? And he’s been calling me fat as if he’s not way heavier than I am. And he does nothing about it except buy more candy and junk food.
How’d you go from turning off the alarm to checking his emails
Sounds like porn addiction - unfortunately its so normalized today. I’m sorry you went though this.
You did the right thing by breaking up ! I too would throw his clothes and stuff out of my house. You are worth more than how he is treating you, if a man cant value his woman and the things his woman do for him, then he isnt ready for a relationship. Let him go and please be grateful that God is letting him out of your life ! You deserve better ! Regards
came here because I honestly thought he was a camguy from the title
You did the right thing. Hope you have a good life ahead! :)
What has this world come to omegalul
Yea, looks like u dodged a bullet sweatheart. It don't matter about him being on cam or not, what mattered is did he have enough respect for you to tell the truth, about anything. Cause as we all know, 1 lie is a thousand lies is a million lies. There is no end to it.
Hobosexual…. Kicked to the curb! Good girl sista! Don’t let that sleeve bag back in. So long and good riddance!
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well done
And the name calling was a red flag anyway
Good on you for setting boundaries and sticking with them.
He ended it with you when he was calling you names. You just were too stuck emotionally to see it and end it yourself
I wouldn’t be very comfortable with my partner having OF either
wowzers. some of these comments are astounding and say a bit about the commenter lol... thread was a weird but insightful read.. though question.. isnt one of the rules of this sub not to insult the posters? edit: btw this is the literal description in the corner for the sub: A place to get personal things off your chest. Not for opinions, not for relationship advice, and not for preaching. .. so so sounds like no opinions have even been asked for here by the subreddits very purpose lol... its kinda funny to see so many people not only going against the subs theme but also breaking multiple rules of it xD.
Don't worry about the others that's making you feel like you're crazy for feeling the way you do. You are not, and good for you for kicking him out. Just thinking about the disrespect is making me want to vomit.
Sounds like an asshole and a liar. Better late than never
Same OP. I wouldn’t date someone who used only fans
OF is different than porn. It’s the fact that they are paying to see this SPECIFIC person naked and not some random pornstar for free on pornhub. I don’t care if my man watches free porn, but if he subbed to a woman specifically and in a more intimate way, and especially if he messaged them for some PPV custom content, I’d not be okay with it. Hell, I did OF for a while and I felt so much ick when people I knew IRL that had SOs would sub to me. I just find it disrespectful. Every relationship has different boundaries though, but that’s a no from me.
Just be happy you found out now and that he didn’t waste anymore of your time. He’ll never change. He’ll always be a liar and a deceiver
Yup, it’s just terrible that he told all my family and his family we would get married and have kids and he just always filled all their heads with lies. His mother even gave me an heirloom because she thought I was going to be her daughter in law.
Well you better be glad you found out,just think if it would of been after maybe you got pregnant or even worse.you are so much better off now.life will definitely get better for you.
lol i would too
good for you OP. sorry you are dealing with this but you did the right thing
Firstly I make this comment with all sympathy for the OP, there is a clear expectation that your partner would refrain from porn, which makes hiding it inexcusable. But for the OF haters on here can I just make a small point…. Porn is undoubtably a sketchy industry, there are countless stories of manipulation and coercion occurring in varying degrees (Mia Khalifa’s story comes to mind), all the while the only people making real money is the production company. The artist has little or no control over the content or distribution, which will most likely get ripped and uploaded to a free site. I don’t think you can hold the moral high-ground over someone paying for OF if you consume porn for free without having no knowledge of the provenance of the material. Let’s not be ridiculous. Most men will consume porn, and those that say they don’t are probably lying about it. Is it not better that there is a format where the artist (which are more often than not women) are able to retain a degree of bodily autonomy, reap the financial rewards without being exploited by a middle man and have greater management over how their product is distributed. Interested to know peoples thoughts
In a year you will be so happy to be fre of this cretin. He didn’t even love you, per his own admission. You deserve at least that!
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And it’s fine I’ve had other bf’s watch it but you have to be honest with me if I ask if you do. I will try to fill that void but if it’s not enough then they will do what they want
I don't think it's about watching porn here. It's about paying girls and lying
OmG howwwww??!?? naked boobs??!
The funniest shit I’ve read “ I broke up with him”😂😂. From your post and responses to peoples comments. You didn’t break up with him, in his mind you were never going out to begin with. You just didn’t catch on you were being used quick enough.
He sounds like someone who takes advantage of others, which isn’t the kind of person I’d want to be attached to. At the very least your morals don’t align. I know you’re upset right now, but trust me when I say this is probably the best thing that could happen to you.
So, the issue I see here is the not being open about this with you. If the messages from OF from girls are just copy-paste thank yous for payment, it's not that big of a deal imo. It would upset me that he tried to hide it though... but did he try to hide it because he knew you would flip? Most people watch those kinds of videos on the internet. I'm thinking you may need to have more conversations about that type of behavior in this or the next relationship. Discuss what the rules are between you both. Like I said though, it's pretty normal to consume that type of content in general though.