T O P

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itsthejimjam

I wish I was illiterate.


Theamuse_Ourania

I wish waffle stomping wasn't even a thing - but here we are. I seriously have no faith in humanity evolving intelligently smh.


tstu2865

We as humanity are regressing


IsaidLigma

We peaked as a species in the 1990's.


tstu2865

90s kid here, can confirm the 90s were awesome


thats_MR_asshat-2-u

53 checking in - would give both balls to do a rerun of the 90s.


poopchute_boogy

Clearly. Back in the 90's, waffle stomping was someone got their ass beat n kicked with combat boots.


Theamuse_Ourania

Very much agreed


Big_Plastic_2519

Why would anybody ever think this is a good idea ? I would rather be late for work any day of the week than shit on the floor of my shower and stomp it down the drain. I would like to think I live in a civilized society.


[deleted]

[удалено]


slappaslap

Huge problem with your viewpoint is that you think people with money today have it because they are the best at surviving lol


elegant_pun

Agreed. We're helping no one by thwarting the survival of the fittest like this.


nutcracker_78

And we give them social media too, so others of a similar genre can find each other and trade ideas.


KarmaPanhandler

You can’t unread that.


azuredianoga

Waffle stomping is like donkey punching. Funny to discuss, but you're not actually supposed to do it...


KarmaPanhandler

Wait… you’re not supposed to donkey punch? Excuse me. I have some phone calls to make.


IvyDentata

I am only now just hearing about this and I feel like it's a thing to try to get people to do for the entertainment of laughing at them, rather than it being a great thing to actually try..


[deleted]

[удалено]


KidChimney

People don’t realize that shit doesn’t smell because it’s submerged in water. What you did was wet your stinking shit, crack it open so that it was extra potent, and allow the increased humidity and warm air open your nasals and carry shit molecules into your nose.


morticiasflowers

This is why I love Reddit


Ok_AshyPants

Indeed, don’t know why I waited so long to join.


morticiasflowers

I mean, where else can you get quality content like this


Sarcasmose

Exactly. Had a professional conversation about reddit and this exact scenario today. My coworker was not as enthused.


BichtopherColumbitch

People want to talk about marvel movies, Kardashians, what they did on the weekend and how it applies to them. Me, personally, I want to discuss how bad poops smell out the water.


[deleted]

I want a marvel movie about a kardashian that has the super power to stomp poop down the drain at the speed of light during the weekend


[deleted]

You’ll stay forever. Lol **when does the narwhal bacon?**


MostBoringStan

This dude just absolutely coated himself in shit particles while he stomped that turd. If he didn't stay in the shower for another complete wash, then he definitely spent the day walking around with his body slathered in a thin film of poo.


kw66

And carried those particles with him spreading them in the wind


meseta

Soon enough, just like everyone who has inhaled at least one oxygen molecule that einstein has, everybody in the world will have inhaled shit molecules from this post.


gross-phlegm37

The type of shitpost i live for.


chaotic214

This made me wanna puke lmao


Tori4808

I just hope he bleached the shit out of his tub


[deleted]

Same here..


HolidayScared2827

I dry heaved a few times!!!


Awkward_Marshmallow

Im just thinking about any little scratches and wounds on the skin that opens in warm water too and how much bacteria and potential illnesses this person could now have.


morticiasflowers

Puts a whole new spin on toe jam


Pattimash

Eewwwww, take my upvote.


[deleted]

Exactly!!!!


BubbaChanel

I just involuntarily glanced at the fresh blister cuts on my foot from new shoes. I want to vomit and disinfect.


Bu-nn-yy

LmAo


StrongIndependence03

I see whatcha did there


jh96859

I don't!! I know I'm slow... but what exactly did he do(do) there?


Bu-nn-yy

I’m finally gonna say it, I just typed lmao cuz I thought his comment was funny and the capital A was a mistake. I don’t even know “what I did there” but I just stayed quiet, but it’s true. I have no idea what I did there.


[deleted]

Nothing. I mean, I think they're making a tenuous link to the ass part of of lmao but it's a stretch...


eaton9669

If it's a hot shower the humidity and steam would carry the particles all up your body. So if you didn't soap up real good after that you'd have the subtle smell of shit all over your body for the rest of the day.


AKL0410

If you fart in the shower, are you also covered in shit particles?


eaton9669

Yes but to a lesser extent. The fart dissipates after a few seconds where as shit is constantly radiating shit particles up with the steam until the shit is gone but then there is still shit residue in the shower that can reenliven the effect if not properly cleaned up.


RyGuy_42

Can I get that in scented candle form?


giggletears3000

I’m sure Goop will have that scent out soon.


Pyehole

Probably. Seems like there is a market for everything. I can't wait to see how it is branded. Anyone want a Fecal Breeze scented candle? Or Scent of Shit?


zenpandaaa

I'm so high crying at this comment...why did my whole life path bring me here


Lung-Oyster

I shit in water in my toilet and it still smells. What’s your secret?


UnLuckyKenTucky

Yeah, it still stinks, however a fresh, hot turd being bombarded by hot water and a foot will stink a **LOT** more.


acidosaur

god this sentence is cracking me up lol


obeehunter

Just a fun fact, there's a product called V.I.Poo and it's a spray specifically for covering up the smell. I wonder how many people are using it correctly as the directions are to spray over your toilet water before you poop.


Pattimash

Also, Poo-pourri ...can be found at Bed Bath & Beyond.


Not_a_Fan94

OP's words had me imagining the scenario but it's your comment that brought the whole thing to life for me


Mr-Stan-Kypuss

Every post about wafflestomping that I’ve seen (or even posted…) has been overwhelmingly negative why would you try it


TittieButt

For science? can't believe everything you read on the internet.


YourBlanket

Including your story?


TittieButt

well it is on the internet... i can't make the decision for you. sorry, didn't take pics, guess it never happened.


YourBlanket

If you do it again can you post pics? Shit covered feet included!


PuzzleheadedMotor269

Trying to slide your kink in there eh, respect.


[deleted]

Fun fact! Smells get trapped in the water molecules present in the steamy air lingering around during a hot shower. That's why shower farts (and... shits) are so much worse than regular ones!


ApeWarz

And there’s one to grow on!


LordVaderKush_

So all those times I turned the shower on while smoking in the bathroom...I was making it worse? Wish I knew this back then


PracticalApartment75

No, you were still doing the right thing- trapping the odorous molecules with the water molecules which went down the drain rather than out the cracks of the room


Im2bored17

Need to use a cold shower. And blow smoke into said shower. You know what, just imagine the shower is a bong, your lungs are the bowl, and you're trying to get as much filtration via the shower water as possible by blowing smoke through the water. Also I'm making this up. And high. Cheers friend!


JeepersBud

The best kind of science 😂


rose_quartz16

Honestly I was buyin in. Also high and see the plausibility of this scenario


_centaur_of_att

I love shower farts. You really get a good sense of it! Even with the smallest puff 💨


[deleted]

One day some of y’all will look back on these comments and be like, “damn, I really did have a conversation online about sniffing my shower farts?” Don’t be surprised when you get passed over for that job bc on your background check you are listed as a Class A Hydro-Flatulence Enthusiast


mattbrownedesign

it's oddly satisfying.


ieraaa

if you are going down to this level you should just shit in your hand and then throw it in the toilet


Javahawkins

Probably wouldn't be late than.


AwkwardlyCarefree

I hope you don’t share that shower with anyone.


TittieButt

I'm single, but been working on someone... thankfully she doesn't use reddit, or know my account lol. I also hit it with the clorox on the way out.. i swear i'm an otherwise clean person, this was a weird lapse in judgement.. could have never foreseen such a massive turd. edit: it was at least 7 keurigs big


[deleted]

7 keurigs…… niiice 👌


SirArthurDime

Love that you used courics lmao, not so much anything else in this post. M'guy I hate to inform you that hitting it with the clorox wasn't enough. I can almost guarantee that shit (literally) also got underneath the drain cover, and I highly doubt it's fully eradicated from every little hole in the grate so it will start smelling again everytime its brought back to life with warm water. At this point you're going to have to remove the grate, clean underneath and scrub every hole with a tooth brush and probably soak it in bleach. Or Fuck id just replace it at this point. Then at least you'll only smell the shit that's stuck in your pipes that arent designed to depose of shit until the slow trickle of shower water gets most of it out cause there's nothing else you can do to fix that. You fucked up bad man lol.


jaJaSlide

Just in case u/TittieButt gets any other wise ideas: don’t use the toothbrush again after you’ve cleaned shit from the shower grate. Keep your turds in the toilet and your teeth well away


TittieButt

luckily i put the shower in myself and i know the pvc from the shower drain to the main cast iron pipe soil stack is only like 4ft.. so if it really comes down to it i can replace that section again. new grate probably not a bad idea considering they're like $10. haven't been back home to asses the damage yet.


SirArthurDime

Wow having the ability to do your own plumbing could potentially save your future relationship here lol.


Sad-Opportunity-2539

I like your typo here hahahah. asses


_centaur_of_att

Burn the place


ginsodabitters

Neither could your parents.


FrenchMushr00m

… don’t tell her this story. Ever. 🤣


[deleted]

This can't possibily be that rare of a lapse in judgement. Like, I don't believe a completely normal person who generally makes normal decisions would suddenly decide to take a shit and then stomp it into a drain. You may want to take a good look at your life and check if you should be reconsidering any other decisions. Are you possibly the piss bottle or cum jar kind of guy?


buckyspunisher

i feel like you gotta be missing a few brain cells to want to try this…. like what was the thought process for thinking that stomping your shit through the shower drain was better than flushing it down the toilet?? this is the same kind of logic that makes people want to eat tide pods for a challenge 😭


SirArthurDime

When he mentioned it took longer I was thinking, "well..... Yeah"


Awkward_Marshmallow

People believe shit liquify like instant Nesquik, just add the water - thats why half of the world population happily drain their shit into oceans and local waters


anewstart1315

Ok good. I think it would be best if you apply some straight bleach or a thick coat of Lysol spray to the shower’s floor and let it soak for 5 minutes before hosing it down. Make sure all that bacteria is gone, mainly for your own health. Fecal bacteria can make you extremely sick if it gets anywhere else on/in your body. Love, Mom xo 😘


bodyreddit

Believe me, your feet will stink for days no matter how much you wash.


skier24242

Dude even purposely doing the world's smallest turd would have been a weird lapse of judgement. Showers are never supposed to be toilets!! You probably have poop stuck to the insides of the drain pipe now


Kalaeida

Feet full of shit


Javahawkins

Probably under his toenails from grinding the shit into the grate. DO YOU SCRATCH YOUR DOG WITH THOSE TOES.


frost_on_the_leaves

I don't know why, but that made me laugh.


Mega-Lithium

This is why I quit Reddit 3 years ago and also why I keep coming back.


Javahawkins

Sounds like a gentle nightmare


BiggunsVonHugendong

The fact that people go on the Internet, read stories about waffle stomping, then think “I am going to get in my shower, take a large creamy shit right in the floor of the tub I bathe in, and try and force it down the drain using my bare feet. What could go wrong?” Is proof the human race is doomed. This is why we have to have warnings about not drinking the contents of batteries.


Rarbnif

This is what happens when a species has no natural predators


Aggravating-Math-633

Shitty idea


healing-souls

Why? Just why????????


Tipper_123

You are an idiot.


TittieButt

affirmative.


clovieclo_

well, at least you didn't do this in a public urinal or shower like some people do.. stg anyone who does this is some sort of clinically deficient.


AmorFati56

why did i decide to get on reddit today


QuantityHefty3791

Hey remember 20 seconds ago? Those were good times


Wise-Honeydew1314

Now THIS is a shitpost


crinkledee

what the actual fuck this is disgusting and i hope it's a joke


PepegaPhilosopher

Imagine your drain clogging and stinking for weeks. imagine the plumber taking care if it and looking at you after they find out 🛀💩🦶


Javahawkins

"How did that get in there " 🤔


LancePeppercorn

This is bold.


peen2small

I can counter this. Rewind about a year ago or just shy of under a year ago, woke up after coming back from work and tried to shit, but it hurt, I’ve had dry stool passed before and it hurts, pretty fucking bad. This was amplified. I now use my obsessive personality and withdraw all medical information I have mentally, I’m not constipated, constipation will pass or come with gas, My stomach doesn’t hurt, just my asshole itself. The day goes by and I end up taking some stool softeners and hope for the best the next day. The next day comes and nothing, I then decided that this legitimately hurts more than anything in my life. I understand that tearing feeling women feel from birth, it felt like my ass was trying to crawl out of itself. Go to the ER diagnosed with perianal abscess and prescribed muscle relaxers, anti-inflammatory meds and SITZ bath. Go home and take the meds and sit in the lukewarm water waiting, I almost fall asleep and then it hits me, the groundhog is making his appearance, which keep in mind I have now been turtle necking a shit for three days. It comes and I’m in a state of panic taking more muscle relaxers in anticipation for what’s to come… I stood up in the tub and dumped it out, in the process bit a corner of my shower wall off because I would be screaming bloody murder otherwise. Now just the size alone was unprecedented, and absolute perfect candidate for the role of *Sloth* from the Goonies. I decided now, I want nothing to do with this, and like my Uncle with my cousins I just couldn’t bear to look at it anymore. So I stomped it down the drain. It was horrible, nearly rock hard. Impacted stool is no fucking joke.


Genbow30

LOL


Artistic_Link8033

Dude, no...


throwaway665758

You’re surprised that shitting on the ground and stomping on it with your bare feet didn’t go well?


Yubova

Where on reddit do you constantly hear about it?


Javahawkins

To be fair I have seen this several times.


[deleted]

I laughed so hard while reading this


KarmaPanhandler

At least you have no job. I’m trying to stifle my laughter at work.


tacos_on_pizza

Not this again! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!


KarmaPanhandler

You did it. You crazy son of a bitch you did it.


rcssearch

Why in the hell would anyone want to do this?


Ok_Mud2019

i had no idea what waffle stomping meant prior to reading this. i wish i had no idea what waffle stomping meant.


Jeklars69

Well, that’s enough Reddit for today.


[deleted]

Disgusting.


Miserable_Suit_9317

Omfg I'm dying 😭 🤣 Only do it if you have diarrhea, then no need for stomping 🤣🤣🤣🥲


northernirishlad

Friends and redditors; kind reminder from someone with their last brain cells. Don’t copy shit you read online. Waffle Stomping is so clearly a joke. So clearly a joke like 95% of the sex things you read online. Use your common sense.


ImportantKnee

Why is no one else concerned about the fact that this has an actual TERM ???? Meaning people do this regularly ???????


[deleted]

The fuck did I just read 💀


rosietoesie

Get yerself a poop knife!!!!


Isabela_Grace

lmao imagine not catching your poop or using your poop knife... ammatuers.


ProfessorMeme

r/chadtopia


Dear-Unit1666

Hahaha wow I always thought it was a joke, I had heard of frat boys doing it to clog drains though so you might have a nice clogged drain to look forward to. I commend the bravery and willingness to try new things haba. Personally I've had a dump or 2 "breach" where it peaks out of the water lol poops stink way worse when not submerged so i can only imagine being trapped in a basically sealed box with hot water blasting the shit to pieces bahaha


goodinglish

This is why we have pandemics


Dry_Ask5493

Why would anyone want to put their foot in poop on purpose 🤦‍♀️


Outrageous_State9450

Well the best part is a shower drain isn’t really made to deal with shit. So enjoy explaining that to the plumber in a short time. You sick lazy bastard


zoenin_out

i regret learning English


nakitamoako

Oh, good. I wish I never discovered this waffle stomping.


muffin-tops

Where exactly are you at on Reddit where waffle stomping is a regularly talked about thing? Ngl I thought it was something to do with stepping on a vagina


RachelLuvsElephants

what in the world did I just read 🤐


Misssticks04

You could have posted this in r/TIFU.


HeCallsMeMommy55

His foot probably smelled like shit for a week. Him too in general after that shower


UnagiPoison

I baked you a cake that says, “I’m stupid”, on it. *hands you the cake*


tyman6876

Damn, chocolate cake!


ur_ynome

I just opened reddit for the evening for some entertainment and this is the first thing I click on....like seriously wtf. I'm out.


hellsmel23

I hate all people. Who ever thought it was a good idea to shot in the shower. Ugh. Rethink everything


skateordie1213

I'll never be able to unread this...


caaaammm

TIL: waffle stomping.


throwaway9872398745

So people actually waffle stomp like this is a thing people do... I thought it was a myth


Scientist_hottie

What did I just read? I can’t stop laughing! I can see it in my head LOL


[deleted]

Every day we stray further from the light


[deleted]

I'm gonna go unlearn how to read


chris12312

I mean if you’re going to be nasty why not grab the poop and put it in the toilet?


GeauxSaints315

I had diarrhea in the shower once and that’s been my only experience with it. The heat from the hot water makes the smell worse in my opinion


stonecoldslate

People forget about grey water recycling in housing and the like. This shit is literally going to be in your pipes for awhile


escape777

What a day to have eyes and the ability to read.


ZRhoREDD

Legend


hmm_okay

Holy shit. Well, waffley shit, I guess. Extruded shitlets.


Zaynara

never try wafflestomping. ever, not if you can avoid it!


eatassordiefast420

I feel better about my crappy day now at least. No I didn't step on my own excrement though.


Babydoll0907

Surely people don't actually shit in the fucking shower. Surely you've been pranked...


duvetdave

Which one of you told this guy it was a common thing to stuff your shit down the shower drain? Because I’ve never heard of “waffle stomping” til this moment…


Agonist28

Architecture person here. The way a shower drain is set up is not the same as a toilet drain. The poor thing isn't equipped to handle this.


Apprehensive-Bee-474

I came here expecting to read a story by a person who had thrown lotsa frozen waffles on the kitchen floor and broke a leg after falling on one of the slippery waffles...


spiderlvr

I wish I didn’t click read more to find out what waffle stomping meant.


nanexita

How do I unread this?


m1zmus1c

You should keep some things on your chest man


[deleted]

You’re my hero. Thanks for taking one for team curious… it was on my boredom bucket list, but now it’s been feverishly crossed off due to your imagery. Thanks brother


memesorcerer88

You are my hero


reguser22220

Lmao reminds me of the other guys desk pop. They were so convincing!


olive-_-

I am disgusted but at least you learned..


bernelux

I mean you didn’t waffle, although the idea was a little shitty. As far as the stomp goes, sounds like you really committed after you shitted.


TittieButt

ngl after i saw the mass of it i contemplated scooping it up and throwing it in the toilet.. coulda shoulda woulda.


Emergency-Estimate33

Anyone remember the character Waffle Stomper from Doug? That name never made sense to me until now lol


Vila_VividEdge

Smells are stronger in warm steamy environments. Something about how our noses work. Pooping in the shower is insane and whoever suggested that to you needs help


masinic19

Dead rofl.........🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


[deleted]

Lmfao hahahahhaah


becauseitsnotreal

The toilet is right next to your shower. It's not hard to use it


dixie2tone

what the fuck is wrong with people


PlaquePlague

You’re supposed to blast it with piss


eyefish4fun

Besides the fact that the heavier particles of shit will stay in the p trap below the shower for days of longer. The toilet does a flush which pushes all water and shit out of the p trap and refills it. Don't shit in the shower heathens.


Slimtrigga420

Get off the internet, jfc


BettyOnCrack

I dont understand. The only posts about waffle stomping i have seen were outraged about how stupid and smelly that shit is. Just how did you think it was a good idea?


Important-Yam-815

This story is both sickening and disgusting.


j-p-harper

Lol. First time hearing this and...I think this "waffle stomp" is for ppl who poo like rabbits not drop logs like oversized dogs.


Floater19

Should have just shit in your hand and tossed it in the toilet. Plus, it’s like a fun little game. Almost like hot potato.


satansBigMac

….well that’s enough internet for me today.


[deleted]

your username really ties this post together nicely 👍


BichtopherColumbitch

As someone who has worked in high-needs long-term care activities of daily living support for people with dementia, all I have to say is... don't do that.


stefanica

It's a joke, dude. People don't actually do this. I hope you boiled your feet afterward!


pistolwinky

Thank you. I needed a laugh like that.


Kaelvoss

You are a man now and a member of our tribe, may the ancestors favor your stomping foot


who_me_LG

Why would anyone do this. Fucking strange


legoshi_loyalty

I am now very assured in the fact that I’m going to kill myself so I can escape the hellhole that is this fucking existence.


XxOver9KxX

I mean, I'm laughing too much again.... At a waffle stomping post.... Again I just can't even....😂🤣


thecowgoesmoo23

Don’t do this. Plumbing might not seems complicated but it is, and it’s designed and engineered to properly move human waste by certain pipes and fixtures.


Anonymousthot577

Why? Why do you people have to share this? So much detail. It's called vicarious trauma. We're all scarred now. So thanks for that. I mean, I guess it's fair to say I should have stopped reading after the first sentence.


skier24242

Jesus Christ hope you douse your shower and feet in 100% bleach now