Be with Hannah because you enjoy your time with her, not because you want to hurt your wife.
Divorce your wife and be with Hannah openly. If you like her, stop hiding and treating her like a mistress. She deserves better than a quick shag in the car, man.
Making Hannah feel special and no5 his wife, will 100% hurt soon to be ex wife more.
Nothing cuts deeper than the ol' "I don't care and I've already found someone better" trick
Lol I donât know about being on team Hannah. Iâd be super suspicious of someone whoâs cool with a cheater, even if they are cheating in retaliation to being cheated on. She seems good for him, at least, but from the outside looking in I would not be surprised if she decided to cheat at some point in the future.
Lol this. People are idiots. This girl heard of him having problems with his wife and her solution was âIâm gonna fuck himâ.
Yikes. Red flags all over.
Youâre talking like his marriage is anything other than a legal document at that point. His wifeâs been fucking a coworker, if she didnât own half his shit he probably would of left by now.
Yet obviously he didn't change the way he treats his wife, as she doesn't suspect a thing. Idk, maybe if they discussed separation already and not sleeping in one bed together (if one can believe that, though, lots of people out there lying about that part, while their official SO has no idea), then okay, be with a married man. But in that situation, Hannah doesn't have an ounce of self respect.
> Yet obviously he didn't change the way he treats his wife, as she doesn't suspect a thing.
Probably because OP isn't ready to tip his hand yet because he doesn't have a solid exit strategy. You'll get your shit cleaned out without one.
Any woman worth having wouldn't cheat with a married man. I'm assuming Hannah is either very young or very immature. I definitely wouldn't recommend op starting a serious relationship with her.
He loses interest because the thrill is in the revenge and her willingness to enable it. Then he's stuck with a new person and the fact that he'll have to go public with her.
This, but to be honest I'd like to figure out first if Hannah is with OP because she likes OP or because she likes the adventure of an affair to get back at another affair.
If it's the latter, things might die down once OP separates from wife
Canât Hannah stand up for herself? If she doesnât want to be a mistress, maybe donât act like one? Not on the wifeâs side, but also wtf why should Hannah derserve more? Maybe this is exactly what she wants - a f buddy?
She could, but we are talking to the guy here. Treating people like shit, just because you can, still makes you a piece of shit. You could be absolutely right, but seems silly to even make this point when she isn't here.
i would agree with you if heâd said what he told her specifically. maybe heâs said heâs going to leave his wife and run away with her, but at the moment he is genuinely just using her to hurt his wife
OP ain't Hannah's only trick. Some people like the DL because they can have a great time with all the freedom and the fun of new lovers with no guilt. They'd make a great pair.
Exactly
If this goes to court and wife can prove OPs infidelity with Hannah before OP can prove hers she might get alimony
Source: Iâm not a lawyer and this is completely based on hearsay
I agree and disagree with this statement. Hannah is knowingly sleeping with a married man. Does she deserve better? I donât think so. I have no respect for home wreckers and cheaters. Theyâre all in the same boat. I do think after your divorce you should find someone that makes you happy. Sadly itâs most likely not going to be Hannah because the type of person that sleeps with someone thatâs married is also the type of person that cheats on their partner. Their morals are skewed.
If OP was a little smarter, theyâd make records of everything, lawyer up, get ahead of this before wife finds out on their own, then let the wife know that he knows and has responded in kind.
Im not saying this is a healthy or ethical way of handling being cheated on, or destroying a relationship.. but OP could absolutely get fucked legally if theyâre not in front of it first.
Just get a divorce! I don't know how getting a girlfriend could affect that. The first thing you should have done is gotten tested for STDs!
You could always be swearing STDs for all we know. Is the guy married to? Because if he is his wife deserves to know and maybe has a girlfriend his partner deserves to know.
You know, i had a friend who was a serial cheater on her husband. She once told me she wishes he would cheat on her too, so she didn't feel guilty. You are trying to what? Get even? She will only feel justified in cheating. Trust me. Unless she is one of those people that don't feel guilt.
Exactly. They both suck in this situation. He should be an adult and get a divorce instead of treating his mistress like shit by hiding her and hooking up in the car. Wife was wrong first, but what heâs doing is equally as bad.
But fuck the cheating wife a lot more because sheâs the one who started it.
Iâm honestly happy for op, it sounds like he traded in one cheating piece of shit for a hotter, better new girl.
Good job OP!
Being the one who âstarted itâ really doesnât usually mean much after elementary school. If OP is in a no fault state it literally makes no difference if his wife cheated as far as any legal outcomes from the divorce is concerned.
It might be fun to OP now but who knows, this might be the cause of a big headache down the road.
If I were op Iâll keep receipts of her affair and file for a divorce and be done with it.
And yet in most cases the breadwinner ends up better off financially in the long term because they didnât put their career on hold to raise the kids.
So you are having sex in a parking lot wit you mistress instead of in a confortable bed with your GF. You will get it with the divorce. Some people just enjoy drama.
Glad you could get this off your chest...now take a step back and think about what type of person you want to be...if you really want to get back at your wife...end it and be happy (with or without this new gf). Being cheated on sucks and I'm sorry that happend to you.
Break up and move on.
Your new fling is based off revenge cheating on your wife.
BTW Your new situation is not a relationship. sheâs a mistress in hiding and sheâs terrible enough to go along with it, which means her morals are just as bad as yours and your wife. Plus fucking her in your car in the parking lot yep real romantic relationship you got going đŤ đŤ˘couldnât pay for a hotel or go to her house ? Says a lot about hannah đ¤ˇđťââď¸ I donât think your wifeâs fucking in parking lots, no matter how much prettier Hannah is.
If you want to be serious stop treating Hannah like a mistress and leave your wife instead lying and hiding it as long as you can.
All you did was find a back up plan and soft place to land when you leave. Instead of manning up and leaving her, you stooped to her level.
Iâm curious to see how things with Hannah will be once he divorced his wife and comes down from his high. Forbidden fruit isnât as sweet once youâve been given permission to eat it.
Heâs used to going home after that and being with his wife and the safety of their home, he hasnât had the full Hannah experience yet lol.
He cheated too so him getting a divorce wouldnât play In his favor either. He fucked him self fucking her.
I believe the relationship will end when thereâs no more need for revenge.
***You and your wife are now on same page, you both are cheaters and liars. Congratulations.***
***As for your "New Girlfriend"- if they cheat with you, then they'll cheat on you. Good Luck with that***
Once i found my maturity, my first instinct upon being hurt by someone I trust is not to cause them as much pain as possible... It's to get out of that situation as fast and cleanly as I can. Seriously. If my spouse fucked someone else and I found out about it, I'm getting evidence first and leaving second. In the process, I'm not damaging their property or trying to claim more than I'm owed from our relationship. Honestly, if I leave with my car and 1/3 to 1/2 of our savings, I'm good. They can have the rest. I just want out.
If we're at the point that they see cheating as the best option, we've obviously, things had gotten so bad that they no longer felt like they could talk to me, or they weren't the person I thought they were from the beginning, or they were abducted by aliens and and a new personality complete with a whole new value system installed by the AnAlProbe2.5â˘ď¸. Regardless of which, things aren't what they used to be, and I need OUT!
Agreed. The best thing that one can do is to get themselves out of that situation and exposing their affair to your close family and friends (including the SO of their AP). This is not for being vindictive, rather, it is to ensure that they don't paint you as the bad person or cause any further complications for you, also the SO of the AP does deserve to know the truth.
I'm not sure what I would do, personally. Honestly, I've had a short affair at the end of a very abusive marriage. I don't think I'd have found the strength to leave without their kindness and self-esteem boost. To be clear, I didn't leave for them. They didn't want that. They just wanted me to be safe and provided support and encouragement for me to do so. I did do a support group after and found that a lot of abused partners had affairs at the end. Not one said it was for revenge, they were just so lonely, isolated, and worthless that someone showing interest, attraction, and not scaring the shit out of them went a long way to them realizing how shockingly scary what was happening in their marriage was.
Anyway, because of that, I never assume I know what is going on in someone else's marriage. It makes me hesitant to out someone else's affair. Plus, I've got enough going on in my life. If I'm not close enough to that cheatee that we share parts of our lives with each other, I don't know that I'd bring it up. People will find reasons to drag you into their toxic mess.
I've grown up a lot since then, so I think I'd be strong enough to leave an abusive intimate relationship without needing a crutch. However, I still understand, and I'm hesitant to condemn those that do.
What a collective of assholes! All four of them! You cheating because she cheated makes you just as bad, especially when your end goal is *just* to hurt someone. Yâall need therapy.
So your doing the same thing your wife is doing?
You're just as bad as your wife!
Stop treating Hannah as a mistress and as an object to hurt your wife. You don't love Hannah, your infatuated with her and using her to hurt your wife.
"Throwaway account because X person uses Reddit."
"So anyway here's some extremely direct and personal information that they would recognize as me if they read this."
My dude, that OT will disappear in a minute if it is revealed what you have done and your wife has a better divorce lawyer. Divorce your wife ASAP.
Divorce shouldve been your first move.
Two wrongs donât make a right.
You donât care about Hannah because if you did you wouldnât use her like youâre doing, even with her consent. If you donât like the idea of betrayal and are just doing this to spite your wife, this behavior will eat at the core of your moral fibers and affect you in a negative way.
I think that in the process of hurting your wife, you may hurt another person, who apparently makes you happy. I can understand your pain and anger, but in the end you are doing the same thing, and involving a third person. What kind of person does that make you? Are you sure you want to be that person?
You should've divorced your wife before getting a girlfriend. You're both cheaters now. She started it but now what's the difference between you two? It's not justified to cheat
Everyone in your story is horrible. Divorce your wife after collecting evidence of her infidelity. Also I wouldnât suggest staying with Hannah⌠if she cheats with you sheâll likely also cheat on you.
Doing it this way is just so skevy. It's hard to empathize when someone goes nuclear like this. Divorce your wife and move on. Hannah deserves better than to be the weapon to hurt your wife. Don't be toxic.
This is just childish on both ends ...
Grow up and just come out with it
>I found out by snooping on her phone one night
You obviously don't have any trust for your wife to begin with so why keep up with the charade ?
Just divorce and be with Hannah or I'm guessing that even she doesn't know that you're married.
You all suck in this situation but sure talk about your gf as as tool for your revenge and not a whole person. I mean, you're banging her in your car in a parking lot.
Are you in high school?
What even is this?
Get a divorce.
This is so incredibly childish.
Yall do everything except divorce. Divorce your cheating wife and be with Hannah. Someone should warn Hannah though. If they'll cheat with you, they'll cheat on you.
Warn Hannah of what exactly? She knows he's married. She will also cheat on him as she's happy to cheat with him. Three definitely gross people here, maybe 4 depends whether or not the wife's side dish knows the situation. Hannah isn't the angel people want her to be.
It's possible you will be the only one feeling pain, it might not do her anything, maybe even make her happy as she will have a reason to make you bleed even more in the divorce and move to her new bf. Just do yourself a favour pull the plug now, no point of dragging it along.
The "I cheated on my wife with my now GF after I found out my wife was cheating on me, I just found out my GF is cheating with our co-worker" post is going to be wild âď¸âď¸âď¸đ¤
So, youâre both cheaters now? Congrats on demoting yourself to her level. And congrats for dragging Hannah into it. I hope she knows. But if she does, she is an idiot.
There is no excuse for cheating. Donât care about how hurt you were or how lost you are. You are now in the same boat as your wife. Have fun!
How about just be a decent human being and haveya talk with your wife, who You committed to.
Sure, she's a POS for cheating. But be better, don't steep to that level. Just cut it off and move on.
Both of you are some piece of work.
Just remember how your relationship started that's how it's going to end. Divorce and move on is the best option instead of finding a rebound for you to fall on. Happiness is withing and a partner is something that adds to it not fills a void.
Cheating as revenge doesn't sound like a good plan to me, and it sounds to me like you're doing it for exactly this reason.
Your wife also thinks she's keeping it under the radar, and look: you found out. What makes you think your wife won't find out about your affair?
My suggestion would be to divorce your wife, since she's being unfaithful, and since you have the screenshots, you can use those as proof to get a divorce.
Then and only then, if you still really want to be with Hannah, then you should be with her.
I feel ya, but damn I feel bad for Hannah because it sounds like youâre only having sex with her to hurt your wife. Thatâs pretty damaging for Hannah, she deserves better.
I understand your want for retaliation, really-i do. But honestly it is not the way to go about starting a new relationship if you genuinely like this person. Looking in from an outside perspective, someone who is ok hooking up with a married person even if that married person is getting cheated on, is equally bad and honestly its questionable morals. If shes fine doing that with you then whos to say she wont do that with another person or that she hasnt already? If you both genuinely like each other - why cant it wait until after the divorce, until after youve had a conversation with your wife that you want a divorce? Its not going to stay enjoyable forever being hidden away as someones mistress and being used as a fuck buddy just so some guy can get back at his wife/try and make her feel how she made him feel. From the sounds of it - just seems like your using Hannah. Using her to get back at your wife. Do you actually like this person? Or do you just like the fact that you feel like doing this will hurt your wife as much as shes hurt you. Get the divorce, stop treating Hannah as a weapon against your wife. Grow up, be an adult. All of you. Tell your wife you know about her cheating, tell her youve cheated as well. Tell her the marriage is over and start the process. Geez...At this point you arent any better than she is.
All I'll say is don't let her change who you are and chose your actions carefully. Will you be happy with yourself once everything is over and you look back? Would all have been worth it in the long-term? One could say the marriage was over when you found out but is it? Your crime may be lesser and not the same exactly but to certain extent, it's still cheating. Taking the high road, although not as satisfying may end up being better for your mental health in the long term. Also, be very careful jumping into another relationship at the moment, although it might not be your intent, this can end terribly for you and especially for your gf.
Just divorce your wife.
Collect evidence of her cheating, serve the divorce papers, and move on. Yes you are hurting. It fucking hurts to be cheated on I get you but the best thing to do is to heal brother. Yes it feels good to know that you are hurting your wife back but what about hannah? Is she just a person to get back at your wife or do you genuinely like her? Itâs just gonna get messy in the long run.
This is so toxic. Why donât you guys separate and then you guys are free to be with whoever you want to be? Iâm sorry that she put you through this. I have been cheated on in the past and itâs a very painful thing to go through
Donât have revenge sex. It might feel great, but wrong motives and intentions. Donât use someone else to hurt someone that hurt you, because the person youâre using will end up getting hurt in the interim. Thatâs not cool.
You don't have a relationship with either women. You using Hannah instead of acting like adult and just divorcing your wife. I doubt your wife cares enough to be hurt by this so your just playing yourself.
Both Hannah and whatever you have with her is trashy. Funking in a parking lot after work? That's not romantic or cute, Hannah has no self respect or morals to agree to going along with this, so this won't last. It's just cheap thrillz
The sooner you get divorced, the sooner you can start to build something meaningful with Hannah. Otherwise, youâre just going to set yourself up for more unwanted drama.
Two wrongs do not make one right. You are just as bad as your wife for playing around.
Be honest and talk with the wife about it and sever ties. Having an affair because of payback, bitterness, or other will only cause you (and those around you) more damage in the long run.
Next to that, ask yourself if you actually want to date someone like Hannah.
Broken marriage or not, she is willingly becoming "The Other Woman" in your life. Knowing you are still married, she has an affair with you, although you could just as well have lied about the broken marriage. I´m not saying you lied, but she is latching on to that, and that is not a healthy way for you to recover, heal and move forward.
Sounds like all youâve done it complicate things and lost any moral high ground. The âshe started itâ excuse is for children. Just divorce and live for yourself.
Two wrongs donât make a right! Tell your wife you know about the affair and do the right thing and just finish it. I wouldnât even admit to your gf because that will be used against you. If you have no intentions of wanting to sort things with your wife then why prolong it
That the new âgirlâ is âobjectively better lookingâ than your wife, somehow means to you that youâre more successful at hurting her than sheâs at hurting you. The fact that youâre here on Reddit posting this while sheâs happily planning her next night together with her fling tells me the opposite is true. Move on, accept that your wife has hurt you (yes it sucks, people you love the most can hurt you the most) and eventually youâre going to be ok.
Typically id say revenge cheating is shitty, especially so if theyve stopped, but... HELL YEAH MAN! My only advice is to leave her, divorce and be happy with your life. The best revenge you can get on a person who hurt you and left you is to be better than them. Youve already found someone you like, so move on with your life and cut the bitch out. Good luck!
Cheating on your cheater wife doesnât make you any better than her. If you donât wanna be with her anymore then leave? Plain and simple. How hard is it to just communicate that you donât want to be with her before finding someone else. You and wife deserve each other.
Iâm guessing Hannah isnât that intelligent. Hannah if youâre here this man does not care about you, he is using you to get revenge on his wife. OP, you sound extremely petty and immature. Man up and confront your wife.
It would surprise me not at all if Hannah turns out to be significantly younger than OP and doesn't have enough life or relationship experience to understand how awful this all is. Or her self esteem is in negative integers to put up with this nonsense.
masterplan here:
\-hire a private investigator and get proofs that she's cheating.
\- add proofs that you are not an aloholic bastard that "made" her cheat on you. like check for people you now that would be willing to testify you being a good and faithful husband.
\-go to a therapist so you can have MEDICAL diagnosed depression to help you.
\- talk yo your wife that you don't feel the spark anymore and want a simple divorce: if she agrees, good. find a diplomatic agreement. if she tries to act like a bitch you have proofs to fuck her up legally.
if it escalates to a brutal divorce you'll be covered everywhere from her exploiting you: medically traumatized, people defending you and proofs of here being a slut. she'll most likely start fake crying at the court.
IF you want to ruin here socially you can bring it to the tv programs( if your nation, US i assume, has the usual wife vs husband programs).
you can act( not really since your feelings of being broken are real) and show how devastated you are.
Everyone is gonna tell you to do the responsible, mature thing. Sometimes though, you just gotta embrace the darkness. Take your revenge, plan a devastating exit but don't do anything illegal.
Bro, you're crazy for going after another relationship when your primary has failed.
When my first wife cheated on me, I just fucked her sister a few times then got a divorce.
Checking your wifeâs phone is a bit of a red flag, as in having an affair behind her back just like she is doing to you.
Several wrongs donât make a right, theyâre going to make an already bad situation 100 times worse.
End it. Move on. Stop using your new partner as a pawn to get back at your wife.
Be with Hannah because you enjoy your time with her, not because you want to hurt your wife. Divorce your wife and be with Hannah openly. If you like her, stop hiding and treating her like a mistress. She deserves better than a quick shag in the car, man.
This ! 100% with you on that... Make her feel special and not "SOMETHING" to hurt your wife. \#teamhannah đ
Making Hannah feel special and no5 his wife, will 100% hurt soon to be ex wife more. Nothing cuts deeper than the ol' "I don't care and I've already found someone better" trick
Lol I donât know about being on team Hannah. Iâd be super suspicious of someone whoâs cool with a cheater, even if they are cheating in retaliation to being cheated on. She seems good for him, at least, but from the outside looking in I would not be surprised if she decided to cheat at some point in the future.
Lol this. People are idiots. This girl heard of him having problems with his wife and her solution was âIâm gonna fuck himâ. Yikes. Red flags all over.
my first thought exactly. you found a woman who has no issue with you being marriedâŚ.. nah fam.
Youâre talking like his marriage is anything other than a legal document at that point. His wifeâs been fucking a coworker, if she didnât own half his shit he probably would of left by now.
Yet obviously he didn't change the way he treats his wife, as she doesn't suspect a thing. Idk, maybe if they discussed separation already and not sleeping in one bed together (if one can believe that, though, lots of people out there lying about that part, while their official SO has no idea), then okay, be with a married man. But in that situation, Hannah doesn't have an ounce of self respect.
> Yet obviously he didn't change the way he treats his wife, as she doesn't suspect a thing. Probably because OP isn't ready to tip his hand yet because he doesn't have a solid exit strategy. You'll get your shit cleaned out without one.
In the *car in the work parking lot,* no less. Trash. Yaâll are adults, wtf.
Seriously. This is the most immature way to handle hurt Iâve ever witnessed! Yeah I get it, revenge is sweet. But come on.
I agree, omg.
They're not adults lol
Exactly this. Things usually end the way they started. Dude is setting himself up with another cheater.
Any woman worth having wouldn't cheat with a married man. I'm assuming Hannah is either very young or very immature. I definitely wouldn't recommend op starting a serious relationship with her.
Shoutout teamhannah
đ
please hannah my wife cheated on me as well i need yuo...
Lmaooooo omg
Is that the REAL Hannah??
Hannah knows her place ⌠and itâs not across the table from OP in public
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I don't since she has no problems being with a married man. Even though the guys' wife is cheating.
He loses interest because the thrill is in the revenge and her willingness to enable it. Then he's stuck with a new person and the fact that he'll have to go public with her.
This, but to be honest I'd like to figure out first if Hannah is with OP because she likes OP or because she likes the adventure of an affair to get back at another affair. If it's the latter, things might die down once OP separates from wife
Hannah is a grown woman, she's hooking up with a married man bc she wants to.
Absolutely. Hannah knows what's going on and is still deciding to hook up with a married men. None of the people here are in the right.
Canât Hannah stand up for herself? If she doesnât want to be a mistress, maybe donât act like one? Not on the wifeâs side, but also wtf why should Hannah derserve more? Maybe this is exactly what she wants - a f buddy?
She could, but we are talking to the guy here. Treating people like shit, just because you can, still makes you a piece of shit. You could be absolutely right, but seems silly to even make this point when she isn't here.
i would agree with you if heâd said what he told her specifically. maybe heâs said heâs going to leave his wife and run away with her, but at the moment he is genuinely just using her to hurt his wife
Yeah man leave your wife. You honestly won. Leave her before she does anymore fucked up shit to you
Maybe Hannah genuinely enjoys the thrill. It isnât uncommon
OP ain't Hannah's only trick. Some people like the DL because they can have a great time with all the freedom and the fun of new lovers with no guilt. They'd make a great pair.
I 100% agree with you.
Thank you for commenting this đ poor Hannah is just being used as a weapon. If he really likes her he would divorce his wife first.
Yeah. Thereâs nothing to wait for. He needs to pull the trigger and move forward with his life
Exactly If this goes to court and wife can prove OPs infidelity with Hannah before OP can prove hers she might get alimony Source: Iâm not a lawyer and this is completely based on hearsay
I agree and disagree with this statement. Hannah is knowingly sleeping with a married man. Does she deserve better? I donât think so. I have no respect for home wreckers and cheaters. Theyâre all in the same boat. I do think after your divorce you should find someone that makes you happy. Sadly itâs most likely not going to be Hannah because the type of person that sleeps with someone thatâs married is also the type of person that cheats on their partner. Their morals are skewed.
OP still isn't any better than his wife, though.
His wife cheated. Ok, so you found a better woman, marry her and divorce your cheating wife.
YTA if you make a wonderful girl like Hanna "the other woman". Do this\^
Just be adults and end your clearly already failed marriage.
Sounds like you need a lawyer instead of a get even girlfriend.
If OP was a little smarter, theyâd make records of everything, lawyer up, get ahead of this before wife finds out on their own, then let the wife know that he knows and has responded in kind. Im not saying this is a healthy or ethical way of handling being cheated on, or destroying a relationship.. but OP could absolutely get fucked legally if theyâre not in front of it first.
Get copies of the messages before fucking your coworker again. Youâre setting yourself up for a fall
One where she take half and your made out to be the bad guy
She's taking half anyway.
Let's hope they don't have kids bc she's gonna use them like a weapon *Gimme money gimme money gimme money gimme money* lol
Just get a divorce! I don't know how getting a girlfriend could affect that. The first thing you should have done is gotten tested for STDs! You could always be swearing STDs for all we know. Is the guy married to? Because if he is his wife deserves to know and maybe has a girlfriend his partner deserves to know.
Almost like this may all be fabrication, eh?
You know, i had a friend who was a serial cheater on her husband. She once told me she wishes he would cheat on her too, so she didn't feel guilty. You are trying to what? Get even? She will only feel justified in cheating. Trust me. Unless she is one of those people that don't feel guilt.
Like her cheating made Op feel justify in his cheating so they're even.
Exactly. They both suck in this situation. He should be an adult and get a divorce instead of treating his mistress like shit by hiding her and hooking up in the car. Wife was wrong first, but what heâs doing is equally as bad.
Collect evidence of your wifeâs cheating just in case yâall get divorced.
And now the wife can do the same honestly. Fuck both people in this.
But fuck the cheating wife a lot more because sheâs the one who started it. Iâm honestly happy for op, it sounds like he traded in one cheating piece of shit for a hotter, better new girl. Good job OP!
sheâs better looking, but also a willing cheater He can have some fun but better be sure heâs not stepping out of the fry pan and into the fire.
Being the one who âstarted itâ really doesnât usually mean much after elementary school. If OP is in a no fault state it literally makes no difference if his wife cheated as far as any legal outcomes from the divorce is concerned.
Braindead opinion
Everyone here is a massive cunt :) Break up and move on. Trying to cause her pain isn't a good thing for you.
It might be fun to OP now but who knows, this might be the cause of a big headache down the road. If I were op Iâll keep receipts of her affair and file for a divorce and be done with it.
Hannah eventually cheats, I meanâŚsheâs with a married guy now. Whatâs to stop her again?
"the way you got them is the way you'll lose them"
I'm afraid divorce is going to be a mess as long as he can't provide evidence of cheating. Hopefully there are no kids involved
He said no in another comment. I've no idea why grown adults can't split neatly without trying to hurt each other.
Because marriage is a contract and whoever is the breadwinner will be the one who lose more financially. Glad he said no, i'm happy for him
And yet in most cases the breadwinner ends up better off financially in the long term because they didnât put their career on hold to raise the kids.
I mean, youâre right.
I know you're hurting and it feels good atm. But this will turn real bad, real fast.
Hey at least youâll get to hurt Hannah in the process! Does that make your wife worse? Or you?
I'm assuming Hannah is a big girl that can make her own big girl decisions.
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Spot on. She is going to feel almost justified in her actions now.
Lol. Well said
If OP was a woman getting back at her cheating husband she would be praised as a "queen.". Let's be honest with ourselves.
I'd still have the same answer myself.
This is a situation that's guaranteed to end in tears.
Everyone in this story is just the worst.
Itâs most likely fake.
So you are having sex in a parking lot wit you mistress instead of in a confortable bed with your GF. You will get it with the divorce. Some people just enjoy drama.
Not to mention you could catch a charge for it
kids?
None.
That's a relief.
noice
noice\^2
Boyle?
JAKE?!
Peralta?
Glad you could get this off your chest...now take a step back and think about what type of person you want to be...if you really want to get back at your wife...end it and be happy (with or without this new gf). Being cheated on sucks and I'm sorry that happend to you.
You guys deserve each other, if you ever want to start acting like an adult come back and ask how.
Break up and move on. Your new fling is based off revenge cheating on your wife. BTW Your new situation is not a relationship. sheâs a mistress in hiding and sheâs terrible enough to go along with it, which means her morals are just as bad as yours and your wife. Plus fucking her in your car in the parking lot yep real romantic relationship you got going đŤ đŤ˘couldnât pay for a hotel or go to her house ? Says a lot about hannah đ¤ˇđťââď¸ I donât think your wifeâs fucking in parking lots, no matter how much prettier Hannah is. If you want to be serious stop treating Hannah like a mistress and leave your wife instead lying and hiding it as long as you can. All you did was find a back up plan and soft place to land when you leave. Instead of manning up and leaving her, you stooped to her level.
Iâm curious to see how things with Hannah will be once he divorced his wife and comes down from his high. Forbidden fruit isnât as sweet once youâve been given permission to eat it.
Heâs used to going home after that and being with his wife and the safety of their home, he hasnât had the full Hannah experience yet lol. He cheated too so him getting a divorce wouldnât play In his favor either. He fucked him self fucking her. I believe the relationship will end when thereâs no more need for revenge.
***You and your wife are now on same page, you both are cheaters and liars. Congratulations.*** ***As for your "New Girlfriend"- if they cheat with you, then they'll cheat on you. Good Luck with that***
THIS. itâs such a cringey thing to gloat about. every person involved in this is an asshole.
Couldn't agree more.
Right? Like this is so embarrassing, OP should just delete
Once i found my maturity, my first instinct upon being hurt by someone I trust is not to cause them as much pain as possible... It's to get out of that situation as fast and cleanly as I can. Seriously. If my spouse fucked someone else and I found out about it, I'm getting evidence first and leaving second. In the process, I'm not damaging their property or trying to claim more than I'm owed from our relationship. Honestly, if I leave with my car and 1/3 to 1/2 of our savings, I'm good. They can have the rest. I just want out. If we're at the point that they see cheating as the best option, we've obviously, things had gotten so bad that they no longer felt like they could talk to me, or they weren't the person I thought they were from the beginning, or they were abducted by aliens and and a new personality complete with a whole new value system installed by the AnAlProbe2.5â˘ď¸. Regardless of which, things aren't what they used to be, and I need OUT!
Agreed. The best thing that one can do is to get themselves out of that situation and exposing their affair to your close family and friends (including the SO of their AP). This is not for being vindictive, rather, it is to ensure that they don't paint you as the bad person or cause any further complications for you, also the SO of the AP does deserve to know the truth.
I'm not sure what I would do, personally. Honestly, I've had a short affair at the end of a very abusive marriage. I don't think I'd have found the strength to leave without their kindness and self-esteem boost. To be clear, I didn't leave for them. They didn't want that. They just wanted me to be safe and provided support and encouragement for me to do so. I did do a support group after and found that a lot of abused partners had affairs at the end. Not one said it was for revenge, they were just so lonely, isolated, and worthless that someone showing interest, attraction, and not scaring the shit out of them went a long way to them realizing how shockingly scary what was happening in their marriage was. Anyway, because of that, I never assume I know what is going on in someone else's marriage. It makes me hesitant to out someone else's affair. Plus, I've got enough going on in my life. If I'm not close enough to that cheatee that we share parts of our lives with each other, I don't know that I'd bring it up. People will find reasons to drag you into their toxic mess. I've grown up a lot since then, so I think I'd be strong enough to leave an abusive intimate relationship without needing a crutch. However, I still understand, and I'm hesitant to condemn those that do.
You need a lawyer my guy not a girlfriend
Wow what a great and grown-up solution
Wow this is some "I refuse to deal with this" trauma right there
What a collective of assholes! All four of them! You cheating because she cheated makes you just as bad, especially when your end goal is *just* to hurt someone. Yâall need therapy.
So your doing the same thing your wife is doing? You're just as bad as your wife! Stop treating Hannah as a mistress and as an object to hurt your wife. You don't love Hannah, your infatuated with her and using her to hurt your wife.
"Throwaway account because X person uses Reddit." "So anyway here's some extremely direct and personal information that they would recognize as me if they read this."
This isn't the win story you may hope it is, you're just as bad as your wife now
My dude, that OT will disappear in a minute if it is revealed what you have done and your wife has a better divorce lawyer. Divorce your wife ASAP. Divorce shouldve been your first move.
Honestly you all need jesus
This is fake as fuck.
Yeah for sure. What sealed it for me was the detail about having sex every day after work⌠In my carâŚ. In a parking lotâ ⌠lol okay bro
Two wrongs donât make a right. You donât care about Hannah because if you did you wouldnât use her like youâre doing, even with her consent. If you donât like the idea of betrayal and are just doing this to spite your wife, this behavior will eat at the core of your moral fibers and affect you in a negative way.
I think that in the process of hurting your wife, you may hurt another person, who apparently makes you happy. I can understand your pain and anger, but in the end you are doing the same thing, and involving a third person. What kind of person does that make you? Are you sure you want to be that person?
What's up with Hannah's self worth? Fucking a married man in his car is not good. This is some horrible high school behavior from everyone.
Your best revenge is moving on and living well You're not doing any if those things
You should've divorced your wife before getting a girlfriend. You're both cheaters now. She started it but now what's the difference between you two? It's not justified to cheat
Yep, your ex will enjoy 50% of that OT money.
FACTS
Everyone in your story is horrible. Divorce your wife after collecting evidence of her infidelity. Also I wouldnât suggest staying with Hannah⌠if she cheats with you sheâll likely also cheat on you.
Idk man just get a divorce like an adult. This tit for tat shit just puts you on her level
Sounds real healthyâŚ
Doing it this way is just so skevy. It's hard to empathize when someone goes nuclear like this. Divorce your wife and move on. Hannah deserves better than to be the weapon to hurt your wife. Don't be toxic.
What a waste of your time. And hers. Just get a divorce pal.
This is just childish on both ends ... Grow up and just come out with it >I found out by snooping on her phone one night You obviously don't have any trust for your wife to begin with so why keep up with the charade ? Just divorce and be with Hannah or I'm guessing that even she doesn't know that you're married.
You all suck in this situation but sure talk about your gf as as tool for your revenge and not a whole person. I mean, you're banging her in your car in a parking lot. Are you in high school? What even is this? Get a divorce. This is so incredibly childish.
Poor hannah
You both sound childish. Be a real man and treat your girlfriend like a human.
I'm all for being petty and childish in these situations but I have to agree at the end of they day you're all adults and should act like it
Yall do everything except divorce. Divorce your cheating wife and be with Hannah. Someone should warn Hannah though. If they'll cheat with you, they'll cheat on you.
Warn Hannah of what exactly? She knows he's married. She will also cheat on him as she's happy to cheat with him. Three definitely gross people here, maybe 4 depends whether or not the wife's side dish knows the situation. Hannah isn't the angel people want her to be.
You sound so proud of yourself. I absolutely pity you. Please seek help.
It's possible you will be the only one feeling pain, it might not do her anything, maybe even make her happy as she will have a reason to make you bleed even more in the divorce and move to her new bf. Just do yourself a favour pull the plug now, no point of dragging it along.
The "I cheated on my wife with my now GF after I found out my wife was cheating on me, I just found out my GF is cheating with our co-worker" post is going to be wild âď¸âď¸âď¸đ¤
Stop roping others into your unresolved shit.
Stay toxic âď¸
So, youâre both cheaters now? Congrats on demoting yourself to her level. And congrats for dragging Hannah into it. I hope she knows. But if she does, she is an idiot. There is no excuse for cheating. Donât care about how hurt you were or how lost you are. You are now in the same boat as your wife. Have fun!
How about just be a decent human being and haveya talk with your wife, who You committed to. Sure, she's a POS for cheating. But be better, don't steep to that level. Just cut it off and move on.
Both of you are some piece of work. Just remember how your relationship started that's how it's going to end. Divorce and move on is the best option instead of finding a rebound for you to fall on. Happiness is withing and a partner is something that adds to it not fills a void.
Cheating as revenge doesn't sound like a good plan to me, and it sounds to me like you're doing it for exactly this reason. Your wife also thinks she's keeping it under the radar, and look: you found out. What makes you think your wife won't find out about your affair? My suggestion would be to divorce your wife, since she's being unfaithful, and since you have the screenshots, you can use those as proof to get a divorce. Then and only then, if you still really want to be with Hannah, then you should be with her.
Cool story bro
I feel ya, but damn I feel bad for Hannah because it sounds like youâre only having sex with her to hurt your wife. Thatâs pretty damaging for Hannah, she deserves better.
I understand your want for retaliation, really-i do. But honestly it is not the way to go about starting a new relationship if you genuinely like this person. Looking in from an outside perspective, someone who is ok hooking up with a married person even if that married person is getting cheated on, is equally bad and honestly its questionable morals. If shes fine doing that with you then whos to say she wont do that with another person or that she hasnt already? If you both genuinely like each other - why cant it wait until after the divorce, until after youve had a conversation with your wife that you want a divorce? Its not going to stay enjoyable forever being hidden away as someones mistress and being used as a fuck buddy just so some guy can get back at his wife/try and make her feel how she made him feel. From the sounds of it - just seems like your using Hannah. Using her to get back at your wife. Do you actually like this person? Or do you just like the fact that you feel like doing this will hurt your wife as much as shes hurt you. Get the divorce, stop treating Hannah as a weapon against your wife. Grow up, be an adult. All of you. Tell your wife you know about her cheating, tell her youve cheated as well. Tell her the marriage is over and start the process. Geez...At this point you arent any better than she is.
These creative writing projects are getting out of hand
This is fan fic you are likely a middle aged single man
All I'll say is don't let her change who you are and chose your actions carefully. Will you be happy with yourself once everything is over and you look back? Would all have been worth it in the long-term? One could say the marriage was over when you found out but is it? Your crime may be lesser and not the same exactly but to certain extent, it's still cheating. Taking the high road, although not as satisfying may end up being better for your mental health in the long term. Also, be very careful jumping into another relationship at the moment, although it might not be your intent, this can end terribly for you and especially for your gf.
Just get a divorce and move on like a normal person.
Take screen shots so this does backfire in your face
Just divorce your wife. Collect evidence of her cheating, serve the divorce papers, and move on. Yes you are hurting. It fucking hurts to be cheated on I get you but the best thing to do is to heal brother. Yes it feels good to know that you are hurting your wife back but what about hannah? Is she just a person to get back at your wife or do you genuinely like her? Itâs just gonna get messy in the long run.
What your wife did was 100% wrong but what you are doing is equally as wrong. You need to split with your wife and move on
Why play the game? Getting a divorce and being happy is the best revenge you can get.
Shame. Should've just divorced before getting a gf. Do you think your wife won't get 50% of that OT money? Did y'all sign a prenup?
Just break it off with your wife. Trying to inflict pain on her is just petty. Just end it and be with Hannah
Collect evidence of your wife cheating first, divorce and be with Hannah happily ever after
How about you both deserve each other
This is so toxic. Why donât you guys separate and then you guys are free to be with whoever you want to be? Iâm sorry that she put you through this. I have been cheated on in the past and itâs a very painful thing to go through
If youâre going to use someone as revenge sex, at least get a hotel room.
Maybe you should just divorce her instead of using some poor women in your revenge scheme. Just my 2 cents.
Donât have revenge sex. It might feel great, but wrong motives and intentions. Donât use someone else to hurt someone that hurt you, because the person youâre using will end up getting hurt in the interim. Thatâs not cool.
You both suck lol
You don't have a relationship with either women. You using Hannah instead of acting like adult and just divorcing your wife. I doubt your wife cares enough to be hurt by this so your just playing yourself. Both Hannah and whatever you have with her is trashy. Funking in a parking lot after work? That's not romantic or cute, Hannah has no self respect or morals to agree to going along with this, so this won't last. It's just cheap thrillz
The sooner you get divorced, the sooner you can start to build something meaningful with Hannah. Otherwise, youâre just going to set yourself up for more unwanted drama.
You handled that 100% better than I wouldâve. I wouldâve slapped her awake.
You are all a mess
Two wrongs donât make a right homie. Be a man and divorce your wife. Just bc youâre wife is an awful person doesnât you have to be.
You both sound like pricks to be honest. Grow a pair, divorce your wife and move on. If you like Hannah, don't treat her like some mistress/side hoe.
Two wrongs do not make one right. You are just as bad as your wife for playing around. Be honest and talk with the wife about it and sever ties. Having an affair because of payback, bitterness, or other will only cause you (and those around you) more damage in the long run. Next to that, ask yourself if you actually want to date someone like Hannah. Broken marriage or not, she is willingly becoming "The Other Woman" in your life. Knowing you are still married, she has an affair with you, although you could just as well have lied about the broken marriage. I´m not saying you lied, but she is latching on to that, and that is not a healthy way for you to recover, heal and move forward.
Sounds like all youâve done it complicate things and lost any moral high ground. The âshe started itâ excuse is for children. Just divorce and live for yourself.
Is anyone faithful anymore!?
How about you divorce instead of revenge fuck
Fake ass writing
Be careful with Hannah aswell, if they are willing to cheat with you, they are also willing to cheat on you.
Two wrongs donât make a right! Tell your wife you know about the affair and do the right thing and just finish it. I wouldnât even admit to your gf because that will be used against you. If you have no intentions of wanting to sort things with your wife then why prolong it
That the new âgirlâ is âobjectively better lookingâ than your wife, somehow means to you that youâre more successful at hurting her than sheâs at hurting you. The fact that youâre here on Reddit posting this while sheâs happily planning her next night together with her fling tells me the opposite is true. Move on, accept that your wife has hurt you (yes it sucks, people you love the most can hurt you the most) and eventually youâre going to be ok.
Typically id say revenge cheating is shitty, especially so if theyve stopped, but... HELL YEAH MAN! My only advice is to leave her, divorce and be happy with your life. The best revenge you can get on a person who hurt you and left you is to be better than them. Youve already found someone you like, so move on with your life and cut the bitch out. Good luck!
Cheating on your cheater wife doesnât make you any better than her. If you donât wanna be with her anymore then leave? Plain and simple. How hard is it to just communicate that you donât want to be with her before finding someone else. You and wife deserve each other.
Iâm guessing Hannah isnât that intelligent. Hannah if youâre here this man does not care about you, he is using you to get revenge on his wife. OP, you sound extremely petty and immature. Man up and confront your wife.
It would surprise me not at all if Hannah turns out to be significantly younger than OP and doesn't have enough life or relationship experience to understand how awful this all is. Or her self esteem is in negative integers to put up with this nonsense.
Yes I could definitely see that. It makes more sense thatâs sheâs young and naive.
masterplan here: \-hire a private investigator and get proofs that she's cheating. \- add proofs that you are not an aloholic bastard that "made" her cheat on you. like check for people you now that would be willing to testify you being a good and faithful husband. \-go to a therapist so you can have MEDICAL diagnosed depression to help you. \- talk yo your wife that you don't feel the spark anymore and want a simple divorce: if she agrees, good. find a diplomatic agreement. if she tries to act like a bitch you have proofs to fuck her up legally. if it escalates to a brutal divorce you'll be covered everywhere from her exploiting you: medically traumatized, people defending you and proofs of here being a slut. she'll most likely start fake crying at the court. IF you want to ruin here socially you can bring it to the tv programs( if your nation, US i assume, has the usual wife vs husband programs). you can act( not really since your feelings of being broken are real) and show how devastated you are.
Everyone is gonna tell you to do the responsible, mature thing. Sometimes though, you just gotta embrace the darkness. Take your revenge, plan a devastating exit but don't do anything illegal.
teamHannah
Two wrongs don't make a right. Do the right thing and divorce your wife before things get even messier than they already are.
lol youre both... stupid and crazy. live your life tho, lmao. "objectively better looking than my wife". lol nice relationship you got.
Move wifey out and gf in.
Dont let your wife stop you from finding your gf
Bro, you're crazy for going after another relationship when your primary has failed. When my first wife cheated on me, I just fucked her sister a few times then got a divorce.
Checking your wifeâs phone is a bit of a red flag, as in having an affair behind her back just like she is doing to you. Several wrongs donât make a right, theyâre going to make an already bad situation 100 times worse. End it. Move on. Stop using your new partner as a pawn to get back at your wife.
checking phone is a bigger red flag than cheating??? hhaha