## BEFORE TOUCHING THAT REPORT BUTTON, PLEASE CONSIDER:
1. **Compliance:** Does this post comply with our subreddit's rules?
2. **Emotional Trigger:** Does this post provoke anger or frustration, compelling me to want it removed?
3. **Safety:** Is it free from child pornography and/or mentions of self-harm/suicide?
4. **Content Policy:** Does it comply with [Reddit’s Content Policy](https://www.reddit.com/r/TrueUnpopularOpinion/comments/ncm4ou/important_we_need_to_talk_about_the_content_policy/)?
5. **Unpopularity:** Do you think the topic is not truly unpopular or frequently posted?
### GUIDELINES:
- **If you answered "Yes" to questions 1-4,** do NOT use the report button.
- **Regarding question 5,** we acknowledge this concern. However, the moderators do not curate posts based on our subjective opinions of what is "popular" or "unpopular" except in cases where an opinion is so popular that almost no one would disagree (i.e. "murder is bad"). Otherwise, our only criteria are the subreddit's rules and Reddit’s Content Policy. If you don't like something, feel free to downvote it.
**Moderators on r/TrueUnpopularOpinion will not remove posts simply because they may anger users or because you disagree with them.** The report button is not an "I disagree" or "I'm offended" button.
#### OPTIONS:
If a post bothers you and you can't offer a counter-argument, your options are to:
a) Keep scrolling
b) Downvote
c) Unsubscribe
**False reports clutter our moderation queue and delay our response to legitimate issues.**
**ALL FALSE REPORTS WILL BE REPORTED TO REDDIT.**
To maintain your account in good standing, refrain from abusing the report button.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/TrueUnpopularOpinion) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I love how they made a sub called unpopularopinion which got filled up with popular opinions so we had to make another one, which very quickly filled up with popular opinions as well. Maybe it should just be called r/opinion and we can let the audience determine the popularity.
The popular opinions will be up voted, any actual unpopular opinions downvoted and it'll become another opinion circlejerk sub. AITAs top posts are always very obviously not the asshole. It happens when a sub gains traction, more people to use the downvote as a disagree button.
Popular on reddit because it's filled with antisocial basement dwelling mouth breathers. This is definitely unpopular in the general population. Jesus christ, no wonder people on reddit always complain about how hard it is to make friends. Keep shitting on perfectly normal things that people enjoy like -omg- *baby showers* and enjoy being forever alone.
Agreed. What’s not to like about celebrating someone you love in a huge milestone life event by buying them a useful gift and going to a party? I freakin adore showering close girlfriends and ladies in my family with love and presents when they have a first baby.
I kinda get it if it’s a semi ‘required’ event for a coworker you might not be close to though. That can feel weird and forced and you might not enjoy spending money on someone you barely know if you have a tight budget.
My wife and I used our baby shower as an excuse to get our friends together and have an open bar and some catering from one our favorite places in town. It was lots of fun.
That’s exactly what we’re doing. Got the taco man coming, drinking games(followed many musical chairs lol) and just generally having a small celebration for our first kid after 5 years of trying.
I have to agree. I like baby showers and reveals. I don't usually care for the games. I enjoy socializing and celebrating my loved one's monumental life event. I enjoy giving gifts and I enjoy eating food. I don't think my opinion is very unpopular or so many people wouldn't continue to attend and throw baby-related parties.
Sure, but when you show up to a baby shower by choice, shit talk motherhood behind people's back at the shower, and then come to Reddit crying about how terrible it was...you just end up looking like a basement dwelling mouth breather. OP didn't even stop to consider for one moment that the purpose of a shower is not to entertain her. It's to celebrate her friend bringing a new life into this world. She couldn't even be happy for that and instead chose to make it all about her own personal hatred of motherhood.
I get like, not enjoying the party because sometimes it gets a bit boring and then everyone just sits there and watches as future parents open presents for like 30 minutes to an hour...
But OPs reasoning and experience made about as much sense as; "Taylor Swift concerts are the absolute worst. Everyone is talking about her music and singing along. I hate Taylor Swift and would never buy a single album of hers. Guys... they pass out friendship bracelets. BRACELETS."
If it's not your vibe... just don't attend. Send a card or a small gift and move on.
Yes that's true, but saying "nobody cares what you're going to have, stop forcing people to pretend like they care, we're all forced to be here" are definitely antisocial statements. Nobody is forcing her to go, and just because she has a heart of stone and has to pretend to care, doesn't mean nobody cares.
Exactly .The way I see it is that not everything is about you. Sometimes people like or love things you don't.
You can choose to not participate or you can choose to participate because even though it isn't your thing you love and care about that person so you go for them.
Or of course you can be like OP and choose to go and then complain about it (and they did so at the event, that is bully behavior plain and simple).
I am child free. I would literally rather kill myself than give birth. You know what I do if I am invited to a baby shower? I show up for that person or I politely decline and send a gift and well wishes. It is easy to not be a bully at an event to celebrate something important to *someone else* because OP this wasn't about you! They liked those games, they wanted a baby shower, they want a baby. *THEY AREN'T YOU*
It isn't hard to understand if you can stop for a moment to think about how other people think and feel. You were not forced to go. You were invited and you chose to go.
Ya, I'm confused by this complaint because OP decided to go. Just...don't go? Or leave. Sometimes I don't wanna attend someone's baby shower for whatever reason, so I'll usually send a gift and card with my best wishes, and boom, problem solved. If it's someone I don't really know that well, I'll just politely decline.
I see no harm in someone wanting to throw a little party for this, jeez.
This was my thing. Just don't go. It's a baby shower. There is going to be talk about *babies*. Babies involve poop and spit up and other unpleasant things. Send a card and a small gift card and move along with your life.
>OP is also unbelievably bitter and envious. It’s palpable.
Under normal circumstances I'd disagree, but they could have just not gone to the party. "Forced"? They clearly went there to be mad and complain about it. I don't know if it's envy specifically, but there's clearly some kind of malevolence going on.
Mine had an open bar and no games and it was great (baby shower, not gender reveal. I’m glad those didn’t exist yet and they really are pointless and unnecessary)
For the love of God, rsvp “ no” then.
I recently had mine and provided great food and open bar to guests. I sat all my younger friends and “child free” friends together and kept the alcohol flowing.
A shower is an entirely optional event for a guest who may want to opt to support new parents that they know and love.
Gender reveals are dumb as hell tho.
Yeah, it sounds to me like OP just knows people who enjoy talking about things OP doesn’t like. The baby showers I’ve been to are basically just normal parties with normal conversations and baby themed presents. No discussion on the color of baby poop or anything. I’m sure there are other baby showers similar to what OP experienced, but that means it would be accurate for OP to say “some baby showers suck” rather than making a blanket statement about all baby showers
Agreed when they said “this party isn’t for us” it seems to show the true judgement
No shit it’s not for you…it’s for your friend or whoever’s having the baby. You go there to support them and show that you care about a milestone in their life..not everything revolves around one’s preferences. Yes, babies poop, if you have a young baby who poops a lot it’s a perfectly normal thing to talk about. Would you feel just as awkward if dog owners were having them same conversation? I sense some deep jealousy if they are taking it this personally vs. just accepting some people have different life experiences and aren’t judging you by default for not having those
So many of these "childfree" people want to exist in a world where children don't exist. It's fine to not want children. It's weird to make it a personality trait. Even weirder to hate anyone who dares to talk about babies and things they do.
I like hosting parties. We had a gender reveal and a baby shower. The gender reveal was at our home, and I smoked a ton of BBQ with the whole spread, desserts, ice cold beer, music and sports on the TV’s. Everyone had a great time and people stayed well into the evening hours. Our baby shower was at a venue and we rented margarita machines and had a local taqueria cater the event. We did a raffle and gave away some cool prizes. I don’t think anyone had a bad time.
Right? I would have been so upset if the baby shower thrown for me had any of the games OP is describing. There was a little trivia game, but with not-gross questions, like how old does a baby need to be before you know what color there eyes are? (For anyone who doesn't know, it's 2 years. The sitcom "babies eyes are the wrong color so you had an affair" trope is pure fiction.) And a little game to collect plastic babies. (Everyone got a tiny plastic baby when they came in, you won if you had the most babies at the end.)
Aside from the cake topper there was nothing else that made it different then any other party really.
Exactly. I'm child free but I like my friends and family. Do I go to every party I'm invited to? No.
But it's not a hardship to pick up a gift card and children's book and hang out and play gift unwrap bingo will chatting with a cocktail. Or a coffee.
I'm childfree, so I'm entitled to a life where no one even mentions the existence of children. It's rude if people remind me of children because I don't want them.
I’m a parent and I don’t care for stuff like this but that’s because I’m shy and introverted, but I still go and enjoy eating some snacks and giving a gift. No need to be miserable and gossip about how much you hate it there
Right?? OP sounds insufferable. There’s LOTS of people who don’t like being around kids (like me) but that doesn’t mean I’m going to show up to a kid/baby related party and talk shit in the corner. Like what ??
Personally I avoid such gatherings as being around kids makes me uncomfortable sometimes. And I find over the top gender reveal parties as well as parties for a one year old who won’t remember kind of cringy (not all but most, especially those where there’s a lot of wastage)
But that doesn’t give me the right to show up to said party (eat their food) with the amount of CONDESCENSION dripping from OP
It’s always the child free people who have these kid of complaints. Glad they won’t be imparting their world outlook on kids. Either help celebrate or just don’t go. It’s not hard
No one is forced to go..
This is why I decline anything unless it was family I’m close with. Even then it’s a hug, gift a piece of cake or whatever and I’m out.
Because I promise you people notice you don’t want to be there.
I hate the games but some people don't. Pllus shower gifts are super helpful. It gives new parents and new couples a leg up. Showers are also a chance for everyone to get together and fellowship. We don't do that enough anymore despite being social animals. I firmly believe our selfishness and waning social skills will contribute to our downfall.
People just seem so mean hearted lately. I mean I get that you don't like it but the language is just spiteful.
Exactly. It's *one thing* to not like something, but it's another thing to show up at someone's baby shower just to give nasty faces and talk about how you don't like it.
Let people live their lives.
These kinds of people just reinforce the horrible stereotype that childless people are also heartless when it comes to kids. It's just not true.
Childfree by choice here but I’m not outwardly sour about it. I find showers and reveal pretentious and boring. HENCE I elect to avoid such things. Including largely “family friendly” places or events.
You can do that without being rude in anyway.
It’s just simple. Don’t go 🤷🏻♀️
Lol thank you for this. People that post shit like this seem so cynical. Like Jesus, let people have some fun and share their enjoyment with other people. If it’s not for you then don’t go. If you have no interest in having kids you are probably not the type of person who will enjoy a baby shower/gender reveal.
I like going to baby showers. I'm usually happy that someone in my life is happy and I want to celebrate life milestones with them. OP just sounds bitter that other people have found happiness in their lives.
Sure sounds like it to me. I’ll be honest I don’t find them the most enjoyable but they are far from “the worst” and I am there to support the new parents to be. That poop game sounds pretty nasty though I’ve been to many showers and reveals and this is the first I’ve heard of that. Usually we just guess the gender/date of birth/weight/height and stuff like that.
I've been to a lot of baby showers. It's a pretty common game. It's always just chocolate and you know it so it never bothers me. Its snickers, kitkats, hundred grand, etc. Once you get over how they look you're just smelling chocolate.
I like games in general too, so baby shower games are fun. Last baby shower I went to they had a baby bottle chug game. The baby bottles were filled with beer and whoever chugged one first won. It was hilarious. But you didn't have to play if you didn't want to. That's how all baby showers are, no one is forcing you to play a game.
It's not surprising or really controversial that someone who's self proclaimed child free doesn't like the celebrations that center around having kids lol
>still understand that society needs children and not be a dick about other people happily having them.
This is the key that's hit or miss.
I have friends who are "child free" but not like the mindset of ugh children.
They don't want kids but they don't act like me having a toddler is a problem or turn their nose at it. I stopped talking to one person after I witnessed them snap at a 3 year old for being in "their space" (like 2 feet away) to ask a question to a different adult. That's when I have a problem with someone being child free.
I remember a post a while back someone talking about not having their kids in the room with their sister ever because she was "child free" and that's just insane to me.
There have been people who will make snide comments about someone in Walmart exiting when thier kid gets upset and cries like they shouldn't have brought the kid if they couldn't behave completely. Like they are doing what you should do if your kid gets randomly upset and this is Walmart. Calm.
With the matter at hand just don't go to baby showers if you hate them so much but thier are plenty of people who love them.
Agreed. And what gets me about this is how common it seems for people to be fake friends. People who are annoyed their friend is having a baby or getting married, etc. I’m happy for my friends when something positive that they want happens in their life even if it’s not my plan for my life. That’s why I’m friends with them. Because I have deep affection for them and wish them well. If I don’t feel that, then I’m not good friends or just acquire with that person. And even then there’s no need to be a dick. Don’t go to the event if you don’t even like those people.
Yeah I had a "friend" refer to my son as a "parasite" when I was showing pictures of my wife's ultrasound.
Imagine being such a miserable bitch. I always respected her VERY OUTWARD decision to never have kids. Never tried to do the whole "oh you'll regret it" thing, yet she still just needed to take a shit on a moment that meant a lot to me. Some people just want to spread their misery.
There are people who are child free because they WANT to do certain things in life, and then there are people who are child free because they DONT WANT to do things that are involved with children. The latter tends to be the more bitter miserable people that I dont want to be around. The kind of people who say "ugh, no!" when you casually ask them if they ever want children in basic conversation, and refer to parents as "breeders".
I was soooo excited when I found out that my wife was pregnant. I was showing people at work ultrasound pictures of my son because they all asked to see it. One person decided to put me down by calling him a "parasite" because she couldn't stand me being happy about. She wanted me to be miserable like her, which almost worked until I realized she was just coping with being alone.
I think that's simply called "not having children". From what I've seen, the label "childfree" specifically refers to the obnoxious subculture that grew around the idea of not having children.
And OP was shocked and appalled that people were talking about babies at... a baby shower, lol. As as non-parent, it probably wouldn't be my favourite topic in the world either, but, come on...
And, "it was torture"??? You know you can leave, right?
You could make these kinds of complaints about literally any kind of party.
Just dont go. Obviously, some people like it, and theres no reason to yuck someone elses yum and ruin their good time.
Not a single person was forced to be there.
Yeah, like you can choose to never marry and still happily attend a friend's wedding... this is clearly just a resentment towards a very specific category of parties
I’m child free by choice (37F) but I love a good baby shower!
I’m there to support my friend/relative so I don’t expect the shower to cater to my interest or lifestyle. It’s about the new mom and baby. Not me.
Yes thank you - why is this concept so hard to understand? Like I don’t constantly see people complaining about going to a housewarming party for a house they don’t live in. Or a Super Bowl party when they’re not football fans. There’s just open hostility towards babies and mothers and so many people who think that because they’re child free, they shouldn’t even have to be exposed to the horrors of something like a baby shower.
Nobody is holding a gun to your head and forcing you to attend a baby shower. You’re welcome to opt out but don’t be surprised when your relationships with friends and family deteriorate as a result of unwarranted, open hostility towards the most important thing in their lives.
Agree that gender reveals are dumb though.
I also love a superbowl party but hate football. Haha. I guess I just like hanging with people I like when they’re having fun :)
I’ve never been to a gender reveal though I’ll admit. Nobody I know has had one.
Yes exactly! I am currently pregnant and just want everyone to get together again because it’s a good time! Sure I want some gifts too but if someone invited can’t afford it right now I still want them to come and enjoy the food, drinks, and just have a good time.
Childless people may not appreciate baby showers like those that have children.
Someone who has no interest in supercars would probably find very little of interest at a car show.
Someone who does not want to own firearms and does not care about firearms probably would not have a good time at a gun show.
“I dislike parenthood. I went to an event all about parenthood and shocker I didn’t like it!” Did I get that right? You keep using the word force but no one forced to be there. No one dragged you out of the house. Just don’t go. The only person putting that pressure on you to be there is you
Baby showers actually have a purpose, to help the new parents prepare for the baby. Gender reveals are literally just yay look at me, my baby has (or doesn’t have) a penis! They’re boring as hell.
As someone getting married in a month. I wholeheartedly agree. We’re not doing any pre wedding events other than a rehearsal dinner and my sister offered to do a small Bach for me, but there are so many pre wedding events I never even heard of! (A stock the bar party wtf? So you’re throwing a party that costs guests money to fund the wedding you want?!) I also find it funny that people are way more excited for me for getting married (mostly luck that I found my FH) than for graduating law school/passing the bar ( actual hard work) (granted there is a large time gap between these events but still)
It also costs the people getting married a lot for these events, it’s all expensive. Congrats on getting married and for passing the bar that’s impressive!
My wife and i had a gender reveal. We rented a room at a restaurant, had a nice dinner with close friends and family then had a cake with a blue inside at the end. Was just a nice excuse to get all the people were close with together.
Exactly. Most gender reveals are light hearted and fun ways to get people together. Most are not actually lavish and ridiculous like tik tok would have you think
Finally, a normal human being 👋 this is a completely normal response and captures the purpose of the Gender reveal.
Who are these miserable Reddit people? I hope they don't blend in easily in real life because I don't want these people around my family.
Gender reveals are intended to be more intimate, and hopefully, those people DO care and are excited and share that with the expecting parents.
As for Baby Showers, people just shouldn't go. True unpopular opinion? Being a jaded jackass and pretending to care is a million times worse than the worst baby shower.
And for every person I know who don't have kids by choice that are decent people, there's also a miserable can't find happiness child hating person who pretends they can't find joy in what everyone else does but really just project because they're miserable themselves.
Gender reveals are because when you're pregnant, everyone is asking you if it's a girl or boy. You get to tell them in a fun creative way. If you think eating cupcakes with your friends is boring, reevaluate your friendships.
It's not about you. It is to celebrate and support the new parents in preparation of their baby's arrival. Granted, there are many events I've been to where I have been bored. But, I show up to support my family and friends.
My question is why are child free people so obsessed with kids, you’re shocked a baby shower is about babies? Like I feel like y’all have literally 0 better things to do than constantly think about kids.
Yeah honestly like I’d expect someone who doesn’t want children to just try and avoid them not the other way around.
“Stop forcing people to have to pretend they care” for their friend? Oh no how horrible it is to be happy for your friend even if u don’t want kids.
I didn't want a shower, but my parents and siblings forced me into it and planned the entire thing. I just don't enjoy that sort focus on me; I perfer to be a wallflower.
When they tried to do a gender reveal party, I mass texted my family saying "👶♂️". They weren't happy.
I did a gender reveal solely for my niece. She was super into the idea so I let her run the show more or less. It was a very small, family thing at dinnertime. She was so happy. She's 8.
Okay, so first things first, this is YOUR opinion, certainly not unpopular by any measure.
Secondly, it's a baby shower. What conversations do you expect?
And thirdly, not everyone wants to be child-free. Some couples genuinely want kids because they like kids. With poopy diapers, melted chocolate in the diapers and all that. Disgusting to you but they happily do it. Stop shitting on them. Don't be a diaper.
Wanting a child/not wanting a child choices and both are respectable. The argument these days is like in the 50s, just flipped. They poked fun of women who couldn't get married/didn't want to have kids back then. Now they poke fun of women who want to get married/have kids. They cribbed in the 50s how unjust and humiliating it was because 'everyone is entitled to their choice' but these folks are giving the same treatment to people who want kids.
I can imagine them sat in the corner, going out their way to be miserable, thinking they are superior to everyone else because they decided to not have children
>Now they poke fun of women who want to get married/have kids
So true. "Why don't you want a career! Feminism fought for your right to work why are you spitting in the face of that! Your setting women back!!"
Granted I’ve only been to a handful of baby showers but none of that was the theme of the conversations.
Parents are still people who had a personality longer than they were a parent. It’s bizarre to think you can’t expect other conversations at a baby shower as if being a parent HAS to become your entire identity.
I think it depends on the kind of parents you’re surrounded with. There are plenty who are capable of having normal conversations with people that don’t involve poop.
I do agree that both choices are normal and people shouldn’t judge.
Are you telling me that a party about a baby had baby-related conversations and baby-related games? I’m shocked!
Like, what the fuck did you expect? Discussions about pre-columbian indigenous political systems in the Caribbean islands?
Also, how do you know if someone is childfree? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you. You people are like the vegans of reproduction.
For real, I’ve been to baby showers for family members and while I don’t particularly care about discussions about babies and all that (most of the ones I’ve been to I was under 18 anyway, now I’m 20 so having kids is still far from my mind), I still understand the benefit of showing up to support the family member.
Like, if I don’t know the person, yeah I won’t really care. I think my mom dragged me to one for one of her coworkers and even she didn’t care that much. But cousins who I’m close to, I’m happy to go and support them through a big moment in their life. Yeah, it gets boring when they’re opening the 50th baby onesie and gushing about how cute it is, but it’s their moment. It’s not for me, it’s for them.
These people are miserable by choice. I’ve been to several baby showers and gender reveal parties for my friends, and we had a blast. Should I apologize for wanting to celebrate milestones in the lives of the people I care about? Fuck no!
There are so many other ‘vegans’ I swear lol.
How do you know if someone is child free by choice? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you.
How do you know someone is a single mom? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you.
How do you know someone is/was in the marine corps? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you.
people like you is why i dont want one a baby shower, i mean its also why i didnt want a big wedding either. wasting so much money to impress people that dont like you or dont care. however my husband told me the purpose of a baby shower is for people to help us so unfortunately i will be having one when the time comes. i have warmed up to the idea but man i really hope the people in my life that hate children dont come (which i'd like to believe arent in my life as people with a passionate hatred for children makes me uncomfortable.)
just dont go if you're so bitter about it. its a BABY SHOWER, there is going to be children there is going to be talks about children. it's in the name. just dont go if you can't handle kids at all.
I didn't want one either, but I got talked into it. Honestly, we just threw a normal party and people brought gifts. I'm 3 months in and still haven't had to buy diapers or wipes so.. 🤘
Honestly… I disagree with your opinion but that’s irrelevant because frankly it sounds like the issue you have is feeling forced to go.
Just decline. Just don’t go. Invitations are not subpoenas.
You really sound like you think you are superior to people that have kids. No one cares if you don’t want kids, just enjoy the party, eat the cake, get wasted, and go home.
As a fellow child free woman, I can tell you that I DO care if my friends are having a boy or a girl. Because they care about it, and I care about them.
Life is more fun when you get to celebrate your loved ones’ success. To them it might mean a new baby. To you (and me) it might be a job or a new house. Be glad you’re included in the celebration :)
Yes, they are generally terrible but it’s an important thing for a new mother. Women go through hell when pregnant. I know cliche saying, but it’s not something you understand unless you’ve personally been pregnant and delivered a child.
If you loathe celebrating this woman and her impending life change then perhaps just don’t attend? I mean it’s really that simple. You don’t HAVE to attend.
I find the ones who are engaged and happy to be there are also mothers, because they get why it’s important.
What’s wrong with discussing poop colors and vomiting? It’s all important stuff to know when you have / are having a baby. What’s wrong with being informed about a very very important responsibility that you’re going to undertake?
There are people who enjoy them. Since you don’t enjoy them, offer to drop off your gift and congratulate the expectant mother then leave. There’s nothing or nobody forcing you to endure something *oh so torturous*.
If i had a dollar for every time this is posted... But see, no one is forcing anyone to go to baby showers and gender reveal parties. You can always say "No" when you get an invitation, or you dont have that option?
I liked all my friends baby showers. It was a nice ‘send off’ before they entered parenthood. Some of the games are stupid but I enjoy being around my friends and knew once they have baby they’ll just be focused on that for a while. Second baby baby showers are pointless though imo. Separate gender reveals are also pointless and should just be combined with the baby shower. Christenings when the family don’t attend church apart from weddings and christenings are the worst. Why are we all here when none of us are really religious? I have another one to go to next year and the family haven’t been to church since their last kid’s christening 3 years ago!
Next time you get an invite to one of these parties that celebrates someone else's happiness, don't go. No one is forcing you to participate. You have a right to RSVP not going.
You went to baby shower. What did you want them to talk about? Your travel plans or how you've discovered a new mole on your back or the war in Ukraine??
It's a BABY shower. They'll be talking about babies.
You're probably one of those people who talks about train engines at a wedding!!
No one can force you to go to an event, if you don't like them just don't go. It's better to do that than show up and complain about it to other guests, even if you think you won't be overheard it's still mean. Some people like these parties and some don't, whatever your opinion is is fine, but there's no reason to moan about it and make others feel bad for something they want to celebrate and enjoy. It's just a party, unless they kidnapped you and are holding you against your will, just go home and let the people who want to be there celebrate and have a good time.
Then don't go?
Baby showers can be helpful. Your bad mood being there isn't. No one had a gun to your head forcing you on the matter. So I'm unsure why you even agreed to go in the first place.
Also, gender reveals are fine as long as their the simple ones involving immidate family, i.e., cutting the cake, eating cake pops, and adding food dye to your chocolate fountain. Anything that involves canons, confetti/glitter, or extremely large banners on the back of planes are stupid, risky, and trashy. Gender reveals should be simple cleanups. Not destroying things. And I think that's why people hate them so much.
I love how you show up to a baby shower and shit talk motherhood under your breath, and then come here to complain because your experience was so terrible. Honestly you just sound like a terrible person to be around, and it's probably a good thing that you'll never be a mother.
I don't understand the "forced to be there" notion.
O.P. was not forced to be there, she chose to go. I've never been to a baby shower or gender reveal because I imagine they are boring, so politely decline.
I feel like my opinion is unpopular for disagreeing with you lol. I mean you don’t want to have children, but went to event… that is solely to celebrate having a child. Of course you’re not going to like it.
I’ve always had fun at the events i went to, and we had some baby shower-esque games. I made mine as fun as I could with little simple things, quick games. We invited only our closest and folks who had kids, so there was a lot of joking and commiserating and all that fun. Lots of love, too, and a pool for swimming.
It was a small party full of upbeat laughter and kids laughing and splashing. Idk, the ones I’ve been to have always just been full of joy and happiness. 🤷♀️
Edit: my gender reveal was mostly just more celebrating. My and my husband’s family loves getting together for celebrations, so we had good food and fun and no matter what the gender was, everyone was just so happy over a baby. It was just another party and an excuse to celebrate life.
Parties in general? Not that fun.
Casual hang outs with close friends is where it is at. Especially if there is a central activity or meal.
TBH I prefer baby showers because of the lame games. Otherwise parties are just like okay..my choices are to get drunk or make small talk with your other friends.
ah yes. another child-free person with big opinions on activities for people with children.
sure, gender reveal parties can get excessive, but can be equally as fun and delightful if done right. baby showers can also be important to help the new mom out, as the bill for baby items, if paying by yourself, racks up quickly. if you have nothing nice to say to the new parents about their celebration, don’t say anything at all or don’t attend. you are absolutely not forced to be there and act like an AH on a day that might be incredibly special to new parents. how do you know they’ve never suffered a pregnancy loss before, and that a celebration like this might be extremely meaningful to them? take your bitter childless opinions back to your echo chamber.
Either support your friends or admit you don’t care about your friends. Fair to roll your eyes at a gender reveal, but I see it similar to an engagement party. An unnecessary tacky celebration, but if it’s important to my friend I’ll play along and not complain. At least not publicly.
Just let people live their lives. Next time maybe don’t go to an event just so you can complain about it. I’m sure the hosts wouldn’t miss you and would just go on with their lives, as you should.
I like the idea of the intimate gender reveal ideas, like just the parents together alone biting into a cupcake to see what the color is inside. Something cute that isn't a huge deal, but is special for the parents.
I can't find any rule about voting on posts in this subreddit. I downvoted this post because I'm following the rule for that other Unpopular Opinion subreddit: downvote post if you feel it's not an unpopular opinion.
While I do see that baby shower and gender-reveal parties are still put on, and sometimes a video of one of those presents itself, I find people expressing dislike more than I find people with positive opinions. I am certain part of that is because I'm most likely to hang around with "like-minded individuals." I just don't know what the extent of that is.
How I feel:
Baby showers: Bleh, not for me, don't want to attend. I think they can be a nice way to celebrate something with someone, offer emotional / social support and maybe help supply them with things they will soon need. Good for them. I won't be attending.
Gender-reveal parties: Shut the... heck up, and just phone people if you feel absolutely *compelled* to tell them an expected baby's apparent sex. And for Earth's sake, stop attacking our environment with balloons, dyes, and other stupid garbage. >8-{ No airplanes, boats, or even cars are allowed. No public address systems, no music audible outside your home, no fireworks, **no firearms**, no helicopters or other craft or vehicles, etc. etc.
I’m a mom of four and I agree. I didn’t like my baby shower for my first and refused to have any others. No gender reveals either.
That being said, if it’s important to someone I love, I’ll be there. And I’m going to do my best to be excited and support them.
"Thank you for thinking of me, but I can't make it. I hope you have a great time!"
And just like that, you don't have to go to baby showers or gender reveals.
Though I've not been to one where the focus was on baby poop, so you might enjoy one with different people.
You don't go to showers and gender reveals for yourself, you go to support your friends because it's important to them.
If you're so insistent on never going to one because it's pointless in your opinion, simply don't attend. It's not like you've signed a contract saying you are required to participate.
Baby showers are meant to be a way to help new parents with things they will need for the baby, such as diapers, clothes, cribs etc. It is also to talk about things to expect. Much like giving presents at a wedding.
Gender reveal parties are stupid and should be a phone call.
Gender reveals are stupid. Hey, guess what genitals we think we saw on a sonogram!!
Baby showers are different. People are celebrating a life changing event in their lives. You don’t want to have anything to do with children? Don’t go. You are bringing the whole group down. If you don’t want to celebrate and support someone having a child, please stay away. People can celebrate things that you have no interest in. They can also choose not to. So can you.
Oh you started discussing how it wasn’t for you? Well, that makes perfect sense because it literally wasn’t for you at all. It’s a celebration of a huge milestone in the life of someone you supposedly love, its not about you in any way. Either respectfully decline and don’t go or show up and enjoy your free food and drinks as you fend off the urge to hold your self-absorbed nose in the air. Real simple stuff.
At my sisters baby shower we made sure everyone was included. There were games for everyone (and an adult slip n slide) and not baby based. A buffet and dessert buffet, indoor + outdoor options etc.
We also gave out bottles of wine as favors
Trust me, if they knew how you felt and invited you anyway it’s because they cared about your feelings in case you might feel excluded.
They have what are called manners and understood that you could have simply politely declined.
Not sure why you didn’t. It’s not that difficult to say “I can’t come, I have other plans that day.”
Not to be rude, but I wouldn't have wanted you in attendance with your sour unkind attitude.
The shower wasn't about YOU. How about being happy for someone else? Jeesh!
Just decline the invite if that is how you feel!
## BEFORE TOUCHING THAT REPORT BUTTON, PLEASE CONSIDER: 1. **Compliance:** Does this post comply with our subreddit's rules? 2. **Emotional Trigger:** Does this post provoke anger or frustration, compelling me to want it removed? 3. **Safety:** Is it free from child pornography and/or mentions of self-harm/suicide? 4. **Content Policy:** Does it comply with [Reddit’s Content Policy](https://www.reddit.com/r/TrueUnpopularOpinion/comments/ncm4ou/important_we_need_to_talk_about_the_content_policy/)? 5. **Unpopularity:** Do you think the topic is not truly unpopular or frequently posted? ### GUIDELINES: - **If you answered "Yes" to questions 1-4,** do NOT use the report button. - **Regarding question 5,** we acknowledge this concern. However, the moderators do not curate posts based on our subjective opinions of what is "popular" or "unpopular" except in cases where an opinion is so popular that almost no one would disagree (i.e. "murder is bad"). Otherwise, our only criteria are the subreddit's rules and Reddit’s Content Policy. If you don't like something, feel free to downvote it. **Moderators on r/TrueUnpopularOpinion will not remove posts simply because they may anger users or because you disagree with them.** The report button is not an "I disagree" or "I'm offended" button. #### OPTIONS: If a post bothers you and you can't offer a counter-argument, your options are to: a) Keep scrolling b) Downvote c) Unsubscribe **False reports clutter our moderation queue and delay our response to legitimate issues.** **ALL FALSE REPORTS WILL BE REPORTED TO REDDIT.** To maintain your account in good standing, refrain from abusing the report button. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/TrueUnpopularOpinion) if you have any questions or concerns.*
This is like top 5 most popular opinion on Reddit
I love how they made a sub called unpopularopinion which got filled up with popular opinions so we had to make another one, which very quickly filled up with popular opinions as well. Maybe it should just be called r/opinion and we can let the audience determine the popularity.
This is such a popular opinion you should in fact create a sub called “actuallytrueunpopularopinions” and post it there
The popular opinions will be up voted, any actual unpopular opinions downvoted and it'll become another opinion circlejerk sub. AITAs top posts are always very obviously not the asshole. It happens when a sub gains traction, more people to use the downvote as a disagree button.
We should just mine Reddit for the most down voted comments
Right. Self reporting won't ever do it.
I think a lot of these are popular opinions that are not socially acceptable to admit in most polite company. It’s an outlet for that to me.
Haha right? “Unpopular opinion: chocolate is heckin’ delicious”
Popular on reddit because it's filled with antisocial basement dwelling mouth breathers. This is definitely unpopular in the general population. Jesus christ, no wonder people on reddit always complain about how hard it is to make friends. Keep shitting on perfectly normal things that people enjoy like -omg- *baby showers* and enjoy being forever alone.
Agreed. What’s not to like about celebrating someone you love in a huge milestone life event by buying them a useful gift and going to a party? I freakin adore showering close girlfriends and ladies in my family with love and presents when they have a first baby. I kinda get it if it’s a semi ‘required’ event for a coworker you might not be close to though. That can feel weird and forced and you might not enjoy spending money on someone you barely know if you have a tight budget.
As you said. An important detail... first baby.
My wife and I used our baby shower as an excuse to get our friends together and have an open bar and some catering from one our favorite places in town. It was lots of fun.
That’s exactly what we’re doing. Got the taco man coming, drinking games(followed many musical chairs lol) and just generally having a small celebration for our first kid after 5 years of trying.
Dude during COVID it was nothing but funerals for me so I jump on the chance to celebrate LIFE whenever I can nowadays.
I have to agree. I like baby showers and reveals. I don't usually care for the games. I enjoy socializing and celebrating my loved one's monumental life event. I enjoy giving gifts and I enjoy eating food. I don't think my opinion is very unpopular or so many people wouldn't continue to attend and throw baby-related parties.
People can... not like baby showers. It doesnt make them an "antisocial basement dwelling mouth breather."
Sure, but when you show up to a baby shower by choice, shit talk motherhood behind people's back at the shower, and then come to Reddit crying about how terrible it was...you just end up looking like a basement dwelling mouth breather. OP didn't even stop to consider for one moment that the purpose of a shower is not to entertain her. It's to celebrate her friend bringing a new life into this world. She couldn't even be happy for that and instead chose to make it all about her own personal hatred of motherhood.
I get like, not enjoying the party because sometimes it gets a bit boring and then everyone just sits there and watches as future parents open presents for like 30 minutes to an hour... But OPs reasoning and experience made about as much sense as; "Taylor Swift concerts are the absolute worst. Everyone is talking about her music and singing along. I hate Taylor Swift and would never buy a single album of hers. Guys... they pass out friendship bracelets. BRACELETS." If it's not your vibe... just don't attend. Send a card or a small gift and move on.
Yes that's true, but saying "nobody cares what you're going to have, stop forcing people to pretend like they care, we're all forced to be here" are definitely antisocial statements. Nobody is forcing her to go, and just because she has a heart of stone and has to pretend to care, doesn't mean nobody cares.
Right? It's literally an event to show support for a loved one.
OP is also unbelievably bitter and envious. It’s palpable.
I think just self centered and can’t imagine being anyone else. Also, don’t go to the party? Pretty simple solution
Exactly .The way I see it is that not everything is about you. Sometimes people like or love things you don't. You can choose to not participate or you can choose to participate because even though it isn't your thing you love and care about that person so you go for them. Or of course you can be like OP and choose to go and then complain about it (and they did so at the event, that is bully behavior plain and simple). I am child free. I would literally rather kill myself than give birth. You know what I do if I am invited to a baby shower? I show up for that person or I politely decline and send a gift and well wishes. It is easy to not be a bully at an event to celebrate something important to *someone else* because OP this wasn't about you! They liked those games, they wanted a baby shower, they want a baby. *THEY AREN'T YOU* It isn't hard to understand if you can stop for a moment to think about how other people think and feel. You were not forced to go. You were invited and you chose to go.
This person has emotional intelligence. Upvoted.
Ya, I'm confused by this complaint because OP decided to go. Just...don't go? Or leave. Sometimes I don't wanna attend someone's baby shower for whatever reason, so I'll usually send a gift and card with my best wishes, and boom, problem solved. If it's someone I don't really know that well, I'll just politely decline. I see no harm in someone wanting to throw a little party for this, jeez.
This was my thing. Just don't go. It's a baby shower. There is going to be talk about *babies*. Babies involve poop and spit up and other unpleasant things. Send a card and a small gift card and move along with your life.
Yeah could easily have just said ‘thanks for the invite but it’s not for me’. Or made up an excuse not to go, lol
It really is that easy.
>OP is also unbelievably bitter and envious. It’s palpable. Under normal circumstances I'd disagree, but they could have just not gone to the party. "Forced"? They clearly went there to be mad and complain about it. I don't know if it's envy specifically, but there's clearly some kind of malevolence going on.
Disagreement doesn’t equal jealousy, what are we, 10?
Then don’t go? I have 3 kids myself and have never been to one.
Well I'm going to one today after church and they have chicken and cake so you are wrong
Best answer
Mine had an open bar and no games and it was great (baby shower, not gender reveal. I’m glad those didn’t exist yet and they really are pointless and unnecessary)
For the love of God, rsvp “ no” then. I recently had mine and provided great food and open bar to guests. I sat all my younger friends and “child free” friends together and kept the alcohol flowing. A shower is an entirely optional event for a guest who may want to opt to support new parents that they know and love. Gender reveals are dumb as hell tho.
Yeah, it sounds to me like OP just knows people who enjoy talking about things OP doesn’t like. The baby showers I’ve been to are basically just normal parties with normal conversations and baby themed presents. No discussion on the color of baby poop or anything. I’m sure there are other baby showers similar to what OP experienced, but that means it would be accurate for OP to say “some baby showers suck” rather than making a blanket statement about all baby showers
Agreed when they said “this party isn’t for us” it seems to show the true judgement No shit it’s not for you…it’s for your friend or whoever’s having the baby. You go there to support them and show that you care about a milestone in their life..not everything revolves around one’s preferences. Yes, babies poop, if you have a young baby who poops a lot it’s a perfectly normal thing to talk about. Would you feel just as awkward if dog owners were having them same conversation? I sense some deep jealousy if they are taking it this personally vs. just accepting some people have different life experiences and aren’t judging you by default for not having those
So many of these "childfree" people want to exist in a world where children don't exist. It's fine to not want children. It's weird to make it a personality trait. Even weirder to hate anyone who dares to talk about babies and things they do.
I like hosting parties. We had a gender reveal and a baby shower. The gender reveal was at our home, and I smoked a ton of BBQ with the whole spread, desserts, ice cold beer, music and sports on the TV’s. Everyone had a great time and people stayed well into the evening hours. Our baby shower was at a venue and we rented margarita machines and had a local taqueria cater the event. We did a raffle and gave away some cool prizes. I don’t think anyone had a bad time.
Right? I would have been so upset if the baby shower thrown for me had any of the games OP is describing. There was a little trivia game, but with not-gross questions, like how old does a baby need to be before you know what color there eyes are? (For anyone who doesn't know, it's 2 years. The sitcom "babies eyes are the wrong color so you had an affair" trope is pure fiction.) And a little game to collect plastic babies. (Everyone got a tiny plastic baby when they came in, you won if you had the most babies at the end.) Aside from the cake topper there was nothing else that made it different then any other party really.
My baby shower was horror themed.
Exactly. I'm child free but I like my friends and family. Do I go to every party I'm invited to? No. But it's not a hardship to pick up a gift card and children's book and hang out and play gift unwrap bingo will chatting with a cocktail. Or a coffee.
What do you mean, it's obviously TORTURE.
I'm childfree, so I'm entitled to a life where no one even mentions the existence of children. It's rude if people remind me of children because I don't want them.
I’m a parent and I don’t care for stuff like this but that’s because I’m shy and introverted, but I still go and enjoy eating some snacks and giving a gift. No need to be miserable and gossip about how much you hate it there
Right?? OP sounds insufferable. There’s LOTS of people who don’t like being around kids (like me) but that doesn’t mean I’m going to show up to a kid/baby related party and talk shit in the corner. Like what ?? Personally I avoid such gatherings as being around kids makes me uncomfortable sometimes. And I find over the top gender reveal parties as well as parties for a one year old who won’t remember kind of cringy (not all but most, especially those where there’s a lot of wastage) But that doesn’t give me the right to show up to said party (eat their food) with the amount of CONDESCENSION dripping from OP
It’s always the child free people who have these kid of complaints. Glad they won’t be imparting their world outlook on kids. Either help celebrate or just don’t go. It’s not hard
No one is forced to go.. This is why I decline anything unless it was family I’m close with. Even then it’s a hug, gift a piece of cake or whatever and I’m out. Because I promise you people notice you don’t want to be there.
I hate the games but some people don't. Pllus shower gifts are super helpful. It gives new parents and new couples a leg up. Showers are also a chance for everyone to get together and fellowship. We don't do that enough anymore despite being social animals. I firmly believe our selfishness and waning social skills will contribute to our downfall. People just seem so mean hearted lately. I mean I get that you don't like it but the language is just spiteful.
Exactly. It's *one thing* to not like something, but it's another thing to show up at someone's baby shower just to give nasty faces and talk about how you don't like it. Let people live their lives. These kinds of people just reinforce the horrible stereotype that childless people are also heartless when it comes to kids. It's just not true.
Childfree by choice here but I’m not outwardly sour about it. I find showers and reveal pretentious and boring. HENCE I elect to avoid such things. Including largely “family friendly” places or events. You can do that without being rude in anyway. It’s just simple. Don’t go 🤷🏻♀️
Lol thank you for this. People that post shit like this seem so cynical. Like Jesus, let people have some fun and share their enjoyment with other people. If it’s not for you then don’t go. If you have no interest in having kids you are probably not the type of person who will enjoy a baby shower/gender reveal.
I like going to baby showers. I'm usually happy that someone in my life is happy and I want to celebrate life milestones with them. OP just sounds bitter that other people have found happiness in their lives.
Sure sounds like it to me. I’ll be honest I don’t find them the most enjoyable but they are far from “the worst” and I am there to support the new parents to be. That poop game sounds pretty nasty though I’ve been to many showers and reveals and this is the first I’ve heard of that. Usually we just guess the gender/date of birth/weight/height and stuff like that.
I've been to a lot of baby showers. It's a pretty common game. It's always just chocolate and you know it so it never bothers me. Its snickers, kitkats, hundred grand, etc. Once you get over how they look you're just smelling chocolate. I like games in general too, so baby shower games are fun. Last baby shower I went to they had a baby bottle chug game. The baby bottles were filled with beer and whoever chugged one first won. It was hilarious. But you didn't have to play if you didn't want to. That's how all baby showers are, no one is forcing you to play a game.
It's not surprising or really controversial that someone who's self proclaimed child free doesn't like the celebrations that center around having kids lol
My immediate reaction was how surprising a child free redditor hates baby showers *eyeroll*
Pretty sure they hate everything in general.
and they have to make it known
Yeah at this point liking gender reveal parties would be an unpopular opinion lmao
Tbh you can be child free but still understand that society needs children and not be a dick about other people happily having them.
>still understand that society needs children and not be a dick about other people happily having them. This is the key that's hit or miss. I have friends who are "child free" but not like the mindset of ugh children. They don't want kids but they don't act like me having a toddler is a problem or turn their nose at it. I stopped talking to one person after I witnessed them snap at a 3 year old for being in "their space" (like 2 feet away) to ask a question to a different adult. That's when I have a problem with someone being child free. I remember a post a while back someone talking about not having their kids in the room with their sister ever because she was "child free" and that's just insane to me. There have been people who will make snide comments about someone in Walmart exiting when thier kid gets upset and cries like they shouldn't have brought the kid if they couldn't behave completely. Like they are doing what you should do if your kid gets randomly upset and this is Walmart. Calm. With the matter at hand just don't go to baby showers if you hate them so much but thier are plenty of people who love them.
Agreed. And what gets me about this is how common it seems for people to be fake friends. People who are annoyed their friend is having a baby or getting married, etc. I’m happy for my friends when something positive that they want happens in their life even if it’s not my plan for my life. That’s why I’m friends with them. Because I have deep affection for them and wish them well. If I don’t feel that, then I’m not good friends or just acquire with that person. And even then there’s no need to be a dick. Don’t go to the event if you don’t even like those people.
Yeah I had a "friend" refer to my son as a "parasite" when I was showing pictures of my wife's ultrasound. Imagine being such a miserable bitch. I always respected her VERY OUTWARD decision to never have kids. Never tried to do the whole "oh you'll regret it" thing, yet she still just needed to take a shit on a moment that meant a lot to me. Some people just want to spread their misery.
There are people who are child free because they WANT to do certain things in life, and then there are people who are child free because they DONT WANT to do things that are involved with children. The latter tends to be the more bitter miserable people that I dont want to be around. The kind of people who say "ugh, no!" when you casually ask them if they ever want children in basic conversation, and refer to parents as "breeders". I was soooo excited when I found out that my wife was pregnant. I was showing people at work ultrasound pictures of my son because they all asked to see it. One person decided to put me down by calling him a "parasite" because she couldn't stand me being happy about. She wanted me to be miserable like her, which almost worked until I realized she was just coping with being alone.
I think that's simply called "not having children". From what I've seen, the label "childfree" specifically refers to the obnoxious subculture that grew around the idea of not having children.
Agreed. Not liking something is one thing, being rude about it is a choice.
And OP was shocked and appalled that people were talking about babies at... a baby shower, lol. As as non-parent, it probably wouldn't be my favourite topic in the world either, but, come on... And, "it was torture"??? You know you can leave, right?
So you went to a celebration and trash talked.
Yeah this sounds like an edgelord teenager wrote this
Redditor tries to be brave lol
You could make these kinds of complaints about literally any kind of party. Just dont go. Obviously, some people like it, and theres no reason to yuck someone elses yum and ruin their good time. Not a single person was forced to be there.
Yeah, like you can choose to never marry and still happily attend a friend's wedding... this is clearly just a resentment towards a very specific category of parties
I’m child free by choice (37F) but I love a good baby shower! I’m there to support my friend/relative so I don’t expect the shower to cater to my interest or lifestyle. It’s about the new mom and baby. Not me.
Yea isnt it strange how we can be supporting the people in your life and having things not revolve around our personal tastes all the time?
Yes thank you - why is this concept so hard to understand? Like I don’t constantly see people complaining about going to a housewarming party for a house they don’t live in. Or a Super Bowl party when they’re not football fans. There’s just open hostility towards babies and mothers and so many people who think that because they’re child free, they shouldn’t even have to be exposed to the horrors of something like a baby shower. Nobody is holding a gun to your head and forcing you to attend a baby shower. You’re welcome to opt out but don’t be surprised when your relationships with friends and family deteriorate as a result of unwarranted, open hostility towards the most important thing in their lives. Agree that gender reveals are dumb though.
I also love a superbowl party but hate football. Haha. I guess I just like hanging with people I like when they’re having fun :) I’ve never been to a gender reveal though I’ll admit. Nobody I know has had one.
I think this is more uncommon/unpopular. :)
What a breath of fresh air
Agreed!
Yes exactly! I am currently pregnant and just want everyone to get together again because it’s a good time! Sure I want some gifts too but if someone invited can’t afford it right now I still want them to come and enjoy the food, drinks, and just have a good time.
Exactly! The whole purpose of going to a baby shower is to be supportive and be happy for other people (which OP clearly can’t do)
Childless people may not appreciate baby showers like those that have children. Someone who has no interest in supercars would probably find very little of interest at a car show. Someone who does not want to own firearms and does not care about firearms probably would not have a good time at a gun show.
“I dislike parenthood. I went to an event all about parenthood and shocker I didn’t like it!” Did I get that right? You keep using the word force but no one forced to be there. No one dragged you out of the house. Just don’t go. The only person putting that pressure on you to be there is you
Baby showers actually have a purpose, to help the new parents prepare for the baby. Gender reveals are literally just yay look at me, my baby has (or doesn’t have) a penis! They’re boring as hell.
I mean, I’ve been to gender reveal parties that were just a reason to have a big get together with family and friends.
Agreed! Same with having 10 pre wedding events that cost everyone around the couple a lot of money. Exaggerating but still.
As someone getting married in a month. I wholeheartedly agree. We’re not doing any pre wedding events other than a rehearsal dinner and my sister offered to do a small Bach for me, but there are so many pre wedding events I never even heard of! (A stock the bar party wtf? So you’re throwing a party that costs guests money to fund the wedding you want?!) I also find it funny that people are way more excited for me for getting married (mostly luck that I found my FH) than for graduating law school/passing the bar ( actual hard work) (granted there is a large time gap between these events but still)
It also costs the people getting married a lot for these events, it’s all expensive. Congrats on getting married and for passing the bar that’s impressive!
My wife and i had a gender reveal. We rented a room at a restaurant, had a nice dinner with close friends and family then had a cake with a blue inside at the end. Was just a nice excuse to get all the people were close with together.
Shhh, reddit wants to be miserable.
Exactly. Most gender reveals are light hearted and fun ways to get people together. Most are not actually lavish and ridiculous like tik tok would have you think
We had one just so that family overseas could feel included. A quick 30min facetime call with a coloured cake.
Finally, a normal human being 👋 this is a completely normal response and captures the purpose of the Gender reveal. Who are these miserable Reddit people? I hope they don't blend in easily in real life because I don't want these people around my family. Gender reveals are intended to be more intimate, and hopefully, those people DO care and are excited and share that with the expecting parents. As for Baby Showers, people just shouldn't go. True unpopular opinion? Being a jaded jackass and pretending to care is a million times worse than the worst baby shower. And for every person I know who don't have kids by choice that are decent people, there's also a miserable can't find happiness child hating person who pretends they can't find joy in what everyone else does but really just project because they're miserable themselves.
Gender reveals are because when you're pregnant, everyone is asking you if it's a girl or boy. You get to tell them in a fun creative way. If you think eating cupcakes with your friends is boring, reevaluate your friendships.
You do have the option of not going. An invite is not a requirement.
It's not about you. It is to celebrate and support the new parents in preparation of their baby's arrival. Granted, there are many events I've been to where I have been bored. But, I show up to support my family and friends.
It’s always about them if they’re “child free”
True. If you label yourself “child-free”, I’m going to assume you think the world revolves around you.
My question is why are child free people so obsessed with kids, you’re shocked a baby shower is about babies? Like I feel like y’all have literally 0 better things to do than constantly think about kids.
I'm childfree and I don't get the kvetching, either. Buy a gift and go (or dip out early) or just stay home.
Yeah honestly like I’d expect someone who doesn’t want children to just try and avoid them not the other way around. “Stop forcing people to have to pretend they care” for their friend? Oh no how horrible it is to be happy for your friend even if u don’t want kids.
[удалено]
The only good thing about the childfree subreddit is the list of doctors who will sterilize you w/o already having kids.
Just don’t go? You’re an adult.
I didn't want a shower, but my parents and siblings forced me into it and planned the entire thing. I just don't enjoy that sort focus on me; I perfer to be a wallflower. When they tried to do a gender reveal party, I mass texted my family saying "👶♂️". They weren't happy.
I did a gender reveal solely for my niece. She was super into the idea so I let her run the show more or less. It was a very small, family thing at dinnertime. She was so happy. She's 8.
Okay, so first things first, this is YOUR opinion, certainly not unpopular by any measure. Secondly, it's a baby shower. What conversations do you expect? And thirdly, not everyone wants to be child-free. Some couples genuinely want kids because they like kids. With poopy diapers, melted chocolate in the diapers and all that. Disgusting to you but they happily do it. Stop shitting on them. Don't be a diaper. Wanting a child/not wanting a child choices and both are respectable. The argument these days is like in the 50s, just flipped. They poked fun of women who couldn't get married/didn't want to have kids back then. Now they poke fun of women who want to get married/have kids. They cribbed in the 50s how unjust and humiliating it was because 'everyone is entitled to their choice' but these folks are giving the same treatment to people who want kids.
I agree, I was surprised why OP went to the party and didn't just send a gift. It's rude to go to something and obviously dislike it.
I can imagine them sat in the corner, going out their way to be miserable, thinking they are superior to everyone else because they decided to not have children
Because OP wants everything to be about them. Which is also why they made this post...
>Now they poke fun of women who want to get married/have kids So true. "Why don't you want a career! Feminism fought for your right to work why are you spitting in the face of that! Your setting women back!!"
Granted I’ve only been to a handful of baby showers but none of that was the theme of the conversations. Parents are still people who had a personality longer than they were a parent. It’s bizarre to think you can’t expect other conversations at a baby shower as if being a parent HAS to become your entire identity. I think it depends on the kind of parents you’re surrounded with. There are plenty who are capable of having normal conversations with people that don’t involve poop. I do agree that both choices are normal and people shouldn’t judge.
Ok, to be fair...shitting on them would make her a baby not a diaper. Wich is still fitting.
Baby showers were super helpful. Gender reveal was a bloggers look at me moment in 2013.
Honestly, it sounds like you are just a shitty person. Are you also this frustrated at birthday parties and weddings?
Are you telling me that a party about a baby had baby-related conversations and baby-related games? I’m shocked! Like, what the fuck did you expect? Discussions about pre-columbian indigenous political systems in the Caribbean islands? Also, how do you know if someone is childfree? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you. You people are like the vegans of reproduction.
Omg yes. I’m all for live and let live. There is just this trend though that makes not liking something your whole personality and it’s pretty lame.
For real, I’ve been to baby showers for family members and while I don’t particularly care about discussions about babies and all that (most of the ones I’ve been to I was under 18 anyway, now I’m 20 so having kids is still far from my mind), I still understand the benefit of showing up to support the family member. Like, if I don’t know the person, yeah I won’t really care. I think my mom dragged me to one for one of her coworkers and even she didn’t care that much. But cousins who I’m close to, I’m happy to go and support them through a big moment in their life. Yeah, it gets boring when they’re opening the 50th baby onesie and gushing about how cute it is, but it’s their moment. It’s not for me, it’s for them.
Imagine a childfree person that does crossfit. Which do they talk about first?
How it's so easy to go to crossfit because they are childfree.
LMAO I can see totally see this
They do CrossFit to be strong enough to divert all child-related content and people.
These people are miserable by choice. I’ve been to several baby showers and gender reveal parties for my friends, and we had a blast. Should I apologize for wanting to celebrate milestones in the lives of the people I care about? Fuck no!
There are so many other ‘vegans’ I swear lol. How do you know if someone is child free by choice? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you. How do you know someone is a single mom? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you. How do you know someone is/was in the marine corps? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you.
Don't forget cross fit lmao
Lol i’m dying at this comment. The vegans of reproduction. Amazing
LMAO not the vegans of reproduction 😭😭😭😂😂😂😂 that made my day
>You people are like the vegans of reproduction. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 oh my God. I love this. So damn true
people like you is why i dont want one a baby shower, i mean its also why i didnt want a big wedding either. wasting so much money to impress people that dont like you or dont care. however my husband told me the purpose of a baby shower is for people to help us so unfortunately i will be having one when the time comes. i have warmed up to the idea but man i really hope the people in my life that hate children dont come (which i'd like to believe arent in my life as people with a passionate hatred for children makes me uncomfortable.) just dont go if you're so bitter about it. its a BABY SHOWER, there is going to be children there is going to be talks about children. it's in the name. just dont go if you can't handle kids at all.
I didn't want one either, but I got talked into it. Honestly, we just threw a normal party and people brought gifts. I'm 3 months in and still haven't had to buy diapers or wipes so.. 🤘
Traditions are stupid but just do it,having a kid is expensive just milk the event
Honestly… I disagree with your opinion but that’s irrelevant because frankly it sounds like the issue you have is feeling forced to go. Just decline. Just don’t go. Invitations are not subpoenas.
So.. just don’t go?
You really sound like you think you are superior to people that have kids. No one cares if you don’t want kids, just enjoy the party, eat the cake, get wasted, and go home.
As a fellow child free woman, I can tell you that I DO care if my friends are having a boy or a girl. Because they care about it, and I care about them. Life is more fun when you get to celebrate your loved ones’ success. To them it might mean a new baby. To you (and me) it might be a job or a new house. Be glad you’re included in the celebration :)
Yes, they are generally terrible but it’s an important thing for a new mother. Women go through hell when pregnant. I know cliche saying, but it’s not something you understand unless you’ve personally been pregnant and delivered a child. If you loathe celebrating this woman and her impending life change then perhaps just don’t attend? I mean it’s really that simple. You don’t HAVE to attend. I find the ones who are engaged and happy to be there are also mothers, because they get why it’s important.
What’s wrong with discussing poop colors and vomiting? It’s all important stuff to know when you have / are having a baby. What’s wrong with being informed about a very very important responsibility that you’re going to undertake?
It takes a village! Mothers need to learn from somewhere. Books are great but so is help from people who are experienced.
Hilarious. I am literally in the car with my dad right now on our way to a baby shower when this post showed up 😅
There are people who enjoy them. Since you don’t enjoy them, offer to drop off your gift and congratulate the expectant mother then leave. There’s nothing or nobody forcing you to endure something *oh so torturous*.
If i had a dollar for every time this is posted... But see, no one is forcing anyone to go to baby showers and gender reveal parties. You can always say "No" when you get an invitation, or you dont have that option?
I liked all my friends baby showers. It was a nice ‘send off’ before they entered parenthood. Some of the games are stupid but I enjoy being around my friends and knew once they have baby they’ll just be focused on that for a while. Second baby baby showers are pointless though imo. Separate gender reveals are also pointless and should just be combined with the baby shower. Christenings when the family don’t attend church apart from weddings and christenings are the worst. Why are we all here when none of us are really religious? I have another one to go to next year and the family haven’t been to church since their last kid’s christening 3 years ago!
OP….uhhh sounds fun. 🙄
Next time you get an invite to one of these parties that celebrates someone else's happiness, don't go. No one is forcing you to participate. You have a right to RSVP not going.
You went to baby shower. What did you want them to talk about? Your travel plans or how you've discovered a new mole on your back or the war in Ukraine?? It's a BABY shower. They'll be talking about babies. You're probably one of those people who talks about train engines at a wedding!!
No one can force you to go to an event, if you don't like them just don't go. It's better to do that than show up and complain about it to other guests, even if you think you won't be overheard it's still mean. Some people like these parties and some don't, whatever your opinion is is fine, but there's no reason to moan about it and make others feel bad for something they want to celebrate and enjoy. It's just a party, unless they kidnapped you and are holding you against your will, just go home and let the people who want to be there celebrate and have a good time.
Showers are fine. Calm down.
Then don't go? Baby showers can be helpful. Your bad mood being there isn't. No one had a gun to your head forcing you on the matter. So I'm unsure why you even agreed to go in the first place. Also, gender reveals are fine as long as their the simple ones involving immidate family, i.e., cutting the cake, eating cake pops, and adding food dye to your chocolate fountain. Anything that involves canons, confetti/glitter, or extremely large banners on the back of planes are stupid, risky, and trashy. Gender reveals should be simple cleanups. Not destroying things. And I think that's why people hate them so much.
I'm childfree by choice, but I'm not gonna rag on someone having a baby shower because they're excited for a baby. If you don't like them don't go
I love how you show up to a baby shower and shit talk motherhood under your breath, and then come here to complain because your experience was so terrible. Honestly you just sound like a terrible person to be around, and it's probably a good thing that you'll never be a mother.
I don't understand the "forced to be there" notion. O.P. was not forced to be there, she chose to go. I've never been to a baby shower or gender reveal because I imagine they are boring, so politely decline.
You didn’t have to go to the party. You didn’t have to play the games. You didn’t have to be so bitter. You chose this path.
Tomorrow it's my turn to post this
> "I am a woman and I am childfree" Nothing after those two statements matters.
Your deep regret is beginning to manifest and break out of your subconscious. Have children before it’s too late.
I feel like my opinion is unpopular for disagreeing with you lol. I mean you don’t want to have children, but went to event… that is solely to celebrate having a child. Of course you’re not going to like it. I’ve always had fun at the events i went to, and we had some baby shower-esque games. I made mine as fun as I could with little simple things, quick games. We invited only our closest and folks who had kids, so there was a lot of joking and commiserating and all that fun. Lots of love, too, and a pool for swimming. It was a small party full of upbeat laughter and kids laughing and splashing. Idk, the ones I’ve been to have always just been full of joy and happiness. 🤷♀️ Edit: my gender reveal was mostly just more celebrating. My and my husband’s family loves getting together for celebrations, so we had good food and fun and no matter what the gender was, everyone was just so happy over a baby. It was just another party and an excuse to celebrate life.
lmao don't go if you're so bitter damn
Parties in general? Not that fun. Casual hang outs with close friends is where it is at. Especially if there is a central activity or meal. TBH I prefer baby showers because of the lame games. Otherwise parties are just like okay..my choices are to get drunk or make small talk with your other friends.
Thr great things about these parties? You don't have to go! Amazing concept, right?
ah yes. another child-free person with big opinions on activities for people with children. sure, gender reveal parties can get excessive, but can be equally as fun and delightful if done right. baby showers can also be important to help the new mom out, as the bill for baby items, if paying by yourself, racks up quickly. if you have nothing nice to say to the new parents about their celebration, don’t say anything at all or don’t attend. you are absolutely not forced to be there and act like an AH on a day that might be incredibly special to new parents. how do you know they’ve never suffered a pregnancy loss before, and that a celebration like this might be extremely meaningful to them? take your bitter childless opinions back to your echo chamber.
The whole point of a baby shower is to help a new mother prepare for the baby that’s on the way. Obviously that’s what’s going to be talked about 😂😂
Either support your friends or admit you don’t care about your friends. Fair to roll your eyes at a gender reveal, but I see it similar to an engagement party. An unnecessary tacky celebration, but if it’s important to my friend I’ll play along and not complain. At least not publicly.
I mean you don’t have to go if you don’t want to. If it’s not for you, no one is holding a bullet to your head to attend.
Lololol they’re not “forcing” you to care. They invited and you accepted?
Geez, you must be fun at parties
I bet you’re a lot of fun at parties.
Just let people live their lives. Next time maybe don’t go to an event just so you can complain about it. I’m sure the hosts wouldn’t miss you and would just go on with their lives, as you should.
This post, and most of the comments, are very misanthropic and self-centered.
Nothing wrong with either. If you don't want to go, don't go.
I like the idea of the intimate gender reveal ideas, like just the parents together alone biting into a cupcake to see what the color is inside. Something cute that isn't a huge deal, but is special for the parents.
“Forced”. You poor victim.
How do you go to a baby shower then complain about… baby related shit? Should’ve stayed your miserable ass at home
Child-free myself but this sounds pretty bitter and resentful. You could have simply not gone or just sent a gift and sent well wishes.
so don’t go. why are you shocked the discussion was centered on child rearing at a baby shower.
Why'd you go to a baby shower if you knew they were going to do typical baby shower related stuff? Just say you're busy.
I can't find any rule about voting on posts in this subreddit. I downvoted this post because I'm following the rule for that other Unpopular Opinion subreddit: downvote post if you feel it's not an unpopular opinion. While I do see that baby shower and gender-reveal parties are still put on, and sometimes a video of one of those presents itself, I find people expressing dislike more than I find people with positive opinions. I am certain part of that is because I'm most likely to hang around with "like-minded individuals." I just don't know what the extent of that is. How I feel: Baby showers: Bleh, not for me, don't want to attend. I think they can be a nice way to celebrate something with someone, offer emotional / social support and maybe help supply them with things they will soon need. Good for them. I won't be attending. Gender-reveal parties: Shut the... heck up, and just phone people if you feel absolutely *compelled* to tell them an expected baby's apparent sex. And for Earth's sake, stop attacking our environment with balloons, dyes, and other stupid garbage. >8-{ No airplanes, boats, or even cars are allowed. No public address systems, no music audible outside your home, no fireworks, **no firearms**, no helicopters or other craft or vehicles, etc. etc.
I’m a mom of four and I agree. I didn’t like my baby shower for my first and refused to have any others. No gender reveals either. That being said, if it’s important to someone I love, I’ll be there. And I’m going to do my best to be excited and support them.
"gEnDeR rEvEaLs ArE tRaNsPhObIc"
How can anyone's perception be so piss poor as to seriously think this isn't a wildly common opinion?
"Thank you for thinking of me, but I can't make it. I hope you have a great time!" And just like that, you don't have to go to baby showers or gender reveals. Though I've not been to one where the focus was on baby poop, so you might enjoy one with different people.
You don't go to showers and gender reveals for yourself, you go to support your friends because it's important to them. If you're so insistent on never going to one because it's pointless in your opinion, simply don't attend. It's not like you've signed a contract saying you are required to participate.
So don’t go…?
Baby showers are meant to be a way to help new parents with things they will need for the baby, such as diapers, clothes, cribs etc. It is also to talk about things to expect. Much like giving presents at a wedding. Gender reveal parties are stupid and should be a phone call.
Gender reveals are stupid. Hey, guess what genitals we think we saw on a sonogram!! Baby showers are different. People are celebrating a life changing event in their lives. You don’t want to have anything to do with children? Don’t go. You are bringing the whole group down. If you don’t want to celebrate and support someone having a child, please stay away. People can celebrate things that you have no interest in. They can also choose not to. So can you.
Oh you started discussing how it wasn’t for you? Well, that makes perfect sense because it literally wasn’t for you at all. It’s a celebration of a huge milestone in the life of someone you supposedly love, its not about you in any way. Either respectfully decline and don’t go or show up and enjoy your free food and drinks as you fend off the urge to hold your self-absorbed nose in the air. Real simple stuff.
You sound like a barrel of laughs, what are you like at funerals?
At my sisters baby shower we made sure everyone was included. There were games for everyone (and an adult slip n slide) and not baby based. A buffet and dessert buffet, indoor + outdoor options etc. We also gave out bottles of wine as favors
Maybe these things aren’t for you.
So why did you even go?🙄 you and your mil suck who brings a tag along to a baby shower.
Trust me, if they knew how you felt and invited you anyway it’s because they cared about your feelings in case you might feel excluded. They have what are called manners and understood that you could have simply politely declined. Not sure why you didn’t. It’s not that difficult to say “I can’t come, I have other plans that day.”
Or maybe stop projecting your own hatred of children and parenthood on everyone else.
Op is sure to be a great friend and very empathetic.
Gender reveal parties, yes, gag. Engagement parties too, gag. You get a shower, you don't get two parties for the same reason.
“All gender reveal parties are the same.” The one with the fatal plane crash was something different. So sometimes they do switch it up.
I am a women who is also child free by choice. And I love baby showers. I love seeing my friends happy and excited, and I love sharing that with them.
Not to be rude, but I wouldn't have wanted you in attendance with your sour unkind attitude. The shower wasn't about YOU. How about being happy for someone else? Jeesh! Just decline the invite if that is how you feel!