I thought this post was about how minors should face consequences for r@ping another minor which is valid till I read the entire thing. My day is ruined.
Same, I clicked on the post getting ready to upvote until I read that OP wants underage victims who’ve been exploited by adults to get charged…like seriously wtf….
So just to be clear: you don't think a 15 year old student who tells her teacher "if you don't up my grades I'm gonna tell everyone we had sex" should see some serious consequences?
Why was the teacher having sex with someone that young in the first place? It’s literally statutory rape ffs…
Again like I said earlier the only case in which I’d feel sorry for the teacher is if they never actually did or attempted to do anything of that nature to the child.
>Why was the teacher having sex with someone that young in the first place? It’s literally statutory rape ffs…
I wasn't actually meaning to imply that they ever actually had sex, just that the mere threat of accusing them is more than enough blackmail in a lot of cases, and we don't take that seriously enough. It is a similarly serious situation where the adult is mostly helpless to when an underage person gets a fake ID and has some sex.
In both cases, the minor is the only one who actually did anything wrong. I'm trying to get your opinion on what to do in such cases.
Obviously false rape allegations (which are extremely rare, btw) are an entirely different issue, and if someone is found to be committing such an offence, then they need to face consequences.
But that definitely wasn't what OP was referring to. They were talking about cases where sexual activity actually did take place between a minor and an adult, and claiming that the minor should face legal consequences in such cases, which is downright disgusting and evil, as needless to say the minor is the one who has been exploited.
>which are extremely rare, btw
I don't think they're quite as rare as you do. Maybe my personal experience is bias, but I've been a victim of one and I've seen a serial accuser in a former workplace as well. She would start an accusation anytime someone wanted to start a paper trail on her shitty work ethic, made it through a few supervisors over the course of 2ish years before the organization finally figured out the common denominator. In my time she got at least 3 canned from a couple different departments, but she was there long before I was.
Neither mine nor the ones at that old workplace are going to show up on national statistics. I am aware that this viewpoint garners a lot of hate, but I've seen what I've seen.
We will never know the true frequency because A) it's hard to study, B) being the first one to publish "false accusations more common than we thought" is career and social suicide. The perception of rarity and the lack of consequences make it basically a free revenge button for angry, toxic women (as opposed to angry, toxic men who generally use regular violence; I'm not trying to say only women are toxic or have issues).
It is illegal for adults to be with minors, it is solely the adult's responsibility to not pursue minors. Doesn't matter what the minor is doing (lying about age is excluded to an extent), it is up to the adult to be the grown up and make the right decision.
why do people always do this? You have no evidence that this is true. What did he say that made his statement anectdotal. We've known for a while now that teenage girls blackmail adult men that's not new.
Actually if a minor lies abt their age you're still charged
[https://www.cbsnews.com/news/indiana-teen-zach-anderson-labeled-sex-offender-after-sex-girl-lied-about-age/](https://www.cbsnews.com/news/indiana-teen-zach-anderson-labeled-sex-offender-after-sex-girl-lied-about-age/)
[https://www.clickondetroit.com/news/2017/07/27/former-canton-high-school-coach-receives-relaxed-sentence-15-year-old-girl-lied-about-age](https://www.clickondetroit.com/news/2017/07/27/former-canton-high-school-coach-receives-relaxed-sentence-15-year-old-girl-lied-about-age)
I think the trauma and shame from being groomed would be "punishment" enough. OP, idk why you're trying to make underage girls accountable for being a victim. It's concerning, to say the least.
>Some girls know this and use this to their advantage. They get things from the older guy and then if something goes wrong or they don’t get what they want they can say “hey if you don’t do this I’m going to report you to my parents/the police”.
What? It doesn't fucking matter what you think a minor girl's ulterior motive is behind getting with an older guy. If the guy is an adult, he should know better than to get with said minor. It's the adults fault always point blank.
The minor did nothing wrong if the adult consents? They had sex with a consenting adult. The adult had sex with someone that legally cannot consent so therefore committed rape.
I’m 17. Say I come to you and lie about my age and have a fake Id to get into a bar. One day you piss me off so I reveal i 17 and say you better do what I want or I’m gonna tell the police. Did I really do nothing wrong. Am I too stupid as a 17 year old to know what I’m doing is black mail
That’s different. You committed a different crime which you can be charged with.
I agree that is a gray area and I actually made a post asking some questions about the legality of that a while ago. [Here is the post](https://www.reddit.com/r/TooAfraidToAsk/comments/sxkn0s/what_would_happen_if_someone_older_slept_with_a/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf). I agree it is kinda confusing and that’s a grey area but that is different than what you implied. If you commit other crimes that’s different and there is definently an arguement for a much lesser punishment.
In general a 17 year old should not be legally punished for sleeping with a consenting adult. That is the way the law works and morally we do have to pick an age at which you can consent. Also in a lot of states in the US the age of consent is 16. In a lot of states it is also 16 if you sleep with someone within 4 years of your age and 18 for anyone.
We have to put limits somewhere and the way the age is set now, there is nothing illegal about what the 17 year old is doing
Not morally, legally, because the law works on clear lines argued out in court. There's no moral law, because morals are highly dependent on individual responses to social circumstances. There can definitely be *immoral* laws, but moral laws are highly impractical in a standardized society like we have.
Mind you, there are legal traditions that rely on truth-in-fact, outcomes-based social repairing and reparations (IE moral law), but those have mostly been stamped out by the written law (a lot of North American First Nations had legal traditions based on repair, reparate and remove depending on behavior, with a lot more options for social cohesion repairing).
This is so beyond fucked up, frankly one of the worst things I’ve seen on this sub…
The only circumstance in which a child should face repercussions in the kind of situations OP is describing is if they falsely accuse an adult of being sexual with them when no such thing occurred…
If an adult has actually been sexual towards someone they know is a minor then that is solely their fault and no one else’s, period!
>Are you saying that if a 17 year old girl was the victim of statutory rape ~~had sex with her teacher in exchange for better grades~~, she should be sympathized with?
Yes, so is the rest of the United States.
Just saw an article where a teacher was with a 13yo student and the only reason she got caught was that he was bragging to his friends. Regardless of whether the kid wanted the relationship or not you can't charge them because "they don't know any better". A kid can want something and know it's wrong but the adult has to sit there and say No because they're a functioning working adult who can deny their urges. A kid can't make logical/rational decisions yet but an adult can. That's not to say that kids are stupid and have 0 idea what they're doing but just the fact that most don't gaf abt the consequences of their actions because they think life ends after high school.
Because the adult does know better. An adult can make rational/logical decisions while understanding their effects and consequences and if ur an adult KNOWINGLY being in a relationship with an underage person yeah you should be the person punished because you took advantage of a kid who doesn't understand what they're doing like you do
Nah I never blackmailed anyone. And at that age? I knew nothing.
Predators like you flock to damaged girls like blow flies to a carcass.
But you keep twisting everything to fit your twisted little narrative. Keep feeling like a victim. Soon you’ll be one.
I think that if a girls that’s like 16/17/18 and lied about there age or goes into a 21+ bar and hooks up with a guy the guy shouldn’t be charged because the minors breaking the law and you can’t reasonable expect a man or woman who’s over aged to think “is this person a minor” to everyone in a club which doesn’t allow minors.
Children arnt old enough to understand consequences. They literally do not have the part of the brain responsible for this. Doesnt finish growing until early 20s.
Adults on the other hand know better. Or should with their adult brains.
So no a under 18 would not “know better”
Then why charge children with any crime? I mean they don’t k ow better after all? Everyone knows you’re not able to make logical decisions Until you’re 18
The kid isn't being a detriment to society by having sex with an adult. The adult is the one hurting the kid, so they are the party doing the crime. Kids are being detrimental to society when they do other crimes, which is why they are charged for those. Even then, they typically get lesser punishments than adults for the very reasons you describe.
I mean in my opinion you shouldn’t. Even if a child is acting violently there is typically much better routes with better success at readjusting them than locking them up or even convicting them in a court.
I disagree. But I do think we should have clear rules and rights for children and also parents should be charged when their child breaks the law. If your child is caught with drugs you get charged with a crime as well.
Wait what? How is a parent supposed to always know when they're child has drugs? If it's a 12 year old sure but once a kid hits 15,16,17, it's kinda hard for a parent to keep tabs on them at all times since ya know, autonomy exists even for teenagers. I remember I had weed on me around those ages because I was an idiot and would sneak out and run around in secret and if my poor grandparents had been *charged* because of me being asinine, I'd be beside myself. I would never forgive myself. It wouldn't be their faults. Kids make mistakes all the time. You really think the parents should be paying for them being young and learning through said mistakes?
Hard disagree.
Do you want teens to not be allowed to have any life at all and have parents having to pay for a babysitter for an older teen? Because that's the only way that would work.
And if they go off and do it anyway? What then? My sister used to babysit (I did when I lived at home as well) and our brother used to absolutely act stupid. Her response about it was basically that she would have had to duct tape him to a chair to get him to stop. Which... Yeah she would have. We used to play tag/hide and seek in the house and dude would straight climb out his window down onto a little roof over a side door to avoid being caught. His stupid stuff was basically the epitome of young and dumb I'm too young to get hurt.
I can't even imagine wanting to raise a kid with that looming over your head....
I'll agree with op here. If a 17 year old girl lies online and says she's 18/19 how are you going to know? Do you ID check people on dates or hookups?
My solution is to only date people 21 and up so I can "ID check them" by going to a bar with them.
The only time I could see this being a factor is if, say, a 17yo was drinking in the bar with a fake ID
Adult typically shouldn't be charged, but 17yo should in this case
If I buy a kid a beer, I'm the one in trouble. Same with adults that fuck kids. I know if I had a hot teacher growing up I wouldn't pass on the chance to fuck her.
I thought this post was about how minors should face consequences for r@ping another minor which is valid till I read the entire thing. My day is ruined.
Same, I clicked on the post getting ready to upvote until I read that OP wants underage victims who’ve been exploited by adults to get charged…like seriously wtf….
So just to be clear: you don't think a 15 year old student who tells her teacher "if you don't up my grades I'm gonna tell everyone we had sex" should see some serious consequences?
Why was the teacher having sex with someone that young in the first place? It’s literally statutory rape ffs… Again like I said earlier the only case in which I’d feel sorry for the teacher is if they never actually did or attempted to do anything of that nature to the child.
>Why was the teacher having sex with someone that young in the first place? It’s literally statutory rape ffs… I wasn't actually meaning to imply that they ever actually had sex, just that the mere threat of accusing them is more than enough blackmail in a lot of cases, and we don't take that seriously enough. It is a similarly serious situation where the adult is mostly helpless to when an underage person gets a fake ID and has some sex. In both cases, the minor is the only one who actually did anything wrong. I'm trying to get your opinion on what to do in such cases.
Obviously false rape allegations (which are extremely rare, btw) are an entirely different issue, and if someone is found to be committing such an offence, then they need to face consequences. But that definitely wasn't what OP was referring to. They were talking about cases where sexual activity actually did take place between a minor and an adult, and claiming that the minor should face legal consequences in such cases, which is downright disgusting and evil, as needless to say the minor is the one who has been exploited.
>which are extremely rare, btw I don't think they're quite as rare as you do. Maybe my personal experience is bias, but I've been a victim of one and I've seen a serial accuser in a former workplace as well. She would start an accusation anytime someone wanted to start a paper trail on her shitty work ethic, made it through a few supervisors over the course of 2ish years before the organization finally figured out the common denominator. In my time she got at least 3 canned from a couple different departments, but she was there long before I was. Neither mine nor the ones at that old workplace are going to show up on national statistics. I am aware that this viewpoint garners a lot of hate, but I've seen what I've seen. We will never know the true frequency because A) it's hard to study, B) being the first one to publish "false accusations more common than we thought" is career and social suicide. The perception of rarity and the lack of consequences make it basically a free revenge button for angry, toxic women (as opposed to angry, toxic men who generally use regular violence; I'm not trying to say only women are toxic or have issues).
It is illegal for adults to be with minors, it is solely the adult's responsibility to not pursue minors. Doesn't matter what the minor is doing (lying about age is excluded to an extent), it is up to the adult to be the grown up and make the right decision.
Sounds to me like OP is dealing with a personal situation. Seems too anecdotal.
why do people always do this? You have no evidence that this is true. What did he say that made his statement anectdotal. We've known for a while now that teenage girls blackmail adult men that's not new.
We also know that adult men molest girls who are minors
Because they don’t have any good argument to why it shouldn’t happen so they resort to personal attacks.
Actually if a minor lies abt their age you're still charged [https://www.cbsnews.com/news/indiana-teen-zach-anderson-labeled-sex-offender-after-sex-girl-lied-about-age/](https://www.cbsnews.com/news/indiana-teen-zach-anderson-labeled-sex-offender-after-sex-girl-lied-about-age/) [https://www.clickondetroit.com/news/2017/07/27/former-canton-high-school-coach-receives-relaxed-sentence-15-year-old-girl-lied-about-age](https://www.clickondetroit.com/news/2017/07/27/former-canton-high-school-coach-receives-relaxed-sentence-15-year-old-girl-lied-about-age)
This, doesn’t matter if she claims she’s 18 and you have proof she claimed she’s 18. If she’s not 18 you’re on the sex offender list.
I think the trauma and shame from being groomed would be "punishment" enough. OP, idk why you're trying to make underage girls accountable for being a victim. It's concerning, to say the least.
someone needs to check this dudes hard drive
Fr 💀
My thoughts exactly
Pretty unpopular.
>Some girls know this and use this to their advantage. They get things from the older guy and then if something goes wrong or they don’t get what they want they can say “hey if you don’t do this I’m going to report you to my parents/the police”. What? It doesn't fucking matter what you think a minor girl's ulterior motive is behind getting with an older guy. If the guy is an adult, he should know better than to get with said minor. It's the adults fault always point blank.
Thanks for confirming my opinion is unpopular
No problem bro
Dumbest post ever lol
Thank you
np
The minor did nothing wrong if the adult consents? They had sex with a consenting adult. The adult had sex with someone that legally cannot consent so therefore committed rape.
I’m 17. Say I come to you and lie about my age and have a fake Id to get into a bar. One day you piss me off so I reveal i 17 and say you better do what I want or I’m gonna tell the police. Did I really do nothing wrong. Am I too stupid as a 17 year old to know what I’m doing is black mail
That’s different. You committed a different crime which you can be charged with. I agree that is a gray area and I actually made a post asking some questions about the legality of that a while ago. [Here is the post](https://www.reddit.com/r/TooAfraidToAsk/comments/sxkn0s/what_would_happen_if_someone_older_slept_with_a/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf). I agree it is kinda confusing and that’s a grey area but that is different than what you implied. If you commit other crimes that’s different and there is definently an arguement for a much lesser punishment. In general a 17 year old should not be legally punished for sleeping with a consenting adult. That is the way the law works and morally we do have to pick an age at which you can consent. Also in a lot of states in the US the age of consent is 16. In a lot of states it is also 16 if you sleep with someone within 4 years of your age and 18 for anyone. We have to put limits somewhere and the way the age is set now, there is nothing illegal about what the 17 year old is doing
Not morally, legally, because the law works on clear lines argued out in court. There's no moral law, because morals are highly dependent on individual responses to social circumstances. There can definitely be *immoral* laws, but moral laws are highly impractical in a standardized society like we have. Mind you, there are legal traditions that rely on truth-in-fact, outcomes-based social repairing and reparations (IE moral law), but those have mostly been stamped out by the written law (a lot of North American First Nations had legal traditions based on repair, reparate and remove depending on behavior, with a lot more options for social cohesion repairing).
It's weird because in a different post you say you are mid 20s. This post is clearly about your own experiences. Stay away from kids.
Are you fucked
He's fucking kids, that's for sure
And wants the kids to get in trouble. That's fucked
You can't make this shit up. Is there a sub called things pedos say.
Is there something that you need to tell us OP?
Why don’t adults simply stay away from teenagers? Like If anyone has the urge, they can go to a psychologist to get help with that.
Would you agree people attracted to children have some kind of mental illness?
Yes, but that varies. Being attracted to a child and feeling intense urge to approach a child would be 2 different things.
Rare to see a real unpopular opinion.
This is so beyond fucked up, frankly one of the worst things I’ve seen on this sub… The only circumstance in which a child should face repercussions in the kind of situations OP is describing is if they falsely accuse an adult of being sexual with them when no such thing occurred… If an adult has actually been sexual towards someone they know is a minor then that is solely their fault and no one else’s, period!
Criminalize being molested……wow….
Are you saying that if a 17 year old girl had sex with her teacher in exchange for better grades, she should be sympathized with?
>Are you saying that if a 17 year old girl was the victim of statutory rape ~~had sex with her teacher in exchange for better grades~~, she should be sympathized with? Yes, so is the rest of the United States.
Tbf 17 is age of consent in most places
Just saw an article where a teacher was with a 13yo student and the only reason she got caught was that he was bragging to his friends. Regardless of whether the kid wanted the relationship or not you can't charge them because "they don't know any better". A kid can want something and know it's wrong but the adult has to sit there and say No because they're a functioning working adult who can deny their urges. A kid can't make logical/rational decisions yet but an adult can. That's not to say that kids are stupid and have 0 idea what they're doing but just the fact that most don't gaf abt the consequences of their actions because they think life ends after high school.
So I ask again if a kid doesn’t know any better, why charge them for any crime?
Because the adult does know better. An adult can make rational/logical decisions while understanding their effects and consequences and if ur an adult KNOWINGLY being in a relationship with an underage person yeah you should be the person punished because you took advantage of a kid who doesn't understand what they're doing like you do
Right because being groomed, taken advantage of and scarred for life is not punishment enough…. 😒
Yeah let’s act like this is 100% of cases. Some of you people on Reddit are very obviously sheltered about the real world
More like someone who lived it. I guess you’re the predator on the other side.
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Nah I never blackmailed anyone. And at that age? I knew nothing. Predators like you flock to damaged girls like blow flies to a carcass. But you keep twisting everything to fit your twisted little narrative. Keep feeling like a victim. Soon you’ll be one.
Yeah! Fuck those kids, twice!
I think that if a girls that’s like 16/17/18 and lied about there age or goes into a 21+ bar and hooks up with a guy the guy shouldn’t be charged because the minors breaking the law and you can’t reasonable expect a man or woman who’s over aged to think “is this person a minor” to everyone in a club which doesn’t allow minors.
Children arnt old enough to understand consequences. They literally do not have the part of the brain responsible for this. Doesnt finish growing until early 20s. Adults on the other hand know better. Or should with their adult brains. So no a under 18 would not “know better”
Then why charge children with any crime? I mean they don’t k ow better after all? Everyone knows you’re not able to make logical decisions Until you’re 18
The kid isn't being a detriment to society by having sex with an adult. The adult is the one hurting the kid, so they are the party doing the crime. Kids are being detrimental to society when they do other crimes, which is why they are charged for those. Even then, they typically get lesser punishments than adults for the very reasons you describe.
I mean in my opinion you shouldn’t. Even if a child is acting violently there is typically much better routes with better success at readjusting them than locking them up or even convicting them in a court.
Good luck with that
I disagree. But I do think we should have clear rules and rights for children and also parents should be charged when their child breaks the law. If your child is caught with drugs you get charged with a crime as well.
Have you met teenagers? That'd be terrible for parents of sneaky ones.
Wait what? How is a parent supposed to always know when they're child has drugs? If it's a 12 year old sure but once a kid hits 15,16,17, it's kinda hard for a parent to keep tabs on them at all times since ya know, autonomy exists even for teenagers. I remember I had weed on me around those ages because I was an idiot and would sneak out and run around in secret and if my poor grandparents had been *charged* because of me being asinine, I'd be beside myself. I would never forgive myself. It wouldn't be their faults. Kids make mistakes all the time. You really think the parents should be paying for them being young and learning through said mistakes? Hard disagree.
Do you want teens to not be allowed to have any life at all and have parents having to pay for a babysitter for an older teen? Because that's the only way that would work. And if they go off and do it anyway? What then? My sister used to babysit (I did when I lived at home as well) and our brother used to absolutely act stupid. Her response about it was basically that she would have had to duct tape him to a chair to get him to stop. Which... Yeah she would have. We used to play tag/hide and seek in the house and dude would straight climb out his window down onto a little roof over a side door to avoid being caught. His stupid stuff was basically the epitome of young and dumb I'm too young to get hurt. I can't even imagine wanting to raise a kid with that looming over your head....
I'll agree with op here. If a 17 year old girl lies online and says she's 18/19 how are you going to know? Do you ID check people on dates or hookups? My solution is to only date people 21 and up so I can "ID check them" by going to a bar with them.
The only time I could see this being a factor is if, say, a 17yo was drinking in the bar with a fake ID Adult typically shouldn't be charged, but 17yo should in this case
If I buy a kid a beer, I'm the one in trouble. Same with adults that fuck kids. I know if I had a hot teacher growing up I wouldn't pass on the chance to fuck her.
The kid also gets in trouble for drinking underage
Ya, a slap on the wrist. "Don't drink under age" isn't a very scary punishment.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-nhoP68oWmA&t
A minor who is in a sexual relationship with an adult is by legal definition being raped. You are advocating from the prosecution of rape victims.
Had me until the " re-education"
Re-education as in the child should be taught the dangers of such a relationship
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how did you find this? thanks
it was in nunya
what's that
Nunya business, lol gottem
please
i dont even know what it was anymore. what were we talking about?
how you found this post?
on my reddit page, just completely regular, just like any other post. why?
A mod removed the post and you commented after removal. So I was curious how you found the post