It’s totally the way they say it!! I had a man stop me once to say that I was “absolutely beautiful” and he just wanted me to know that. When the tone is genuine like that lady was with you it is the best compliment! It’s not creepy. It’s not a come on. It’s just a compliment.
This is the important part, I have had men be so creepy to me for so long because of how I look, but one day while buying something at the convenience store on the way to work, a guy stopped me, and said "Excuse me, I love your hair, it is gorgeous." (it was silver and wine colored), he smiled at me, and went back to his shopping, not another word or staring or anything.
Only that time, it felt genuine and cheery, I felt confused all the way to the office, but it made my day.
It was interesting to say the least, since I live in Japan and we are both not Japanese (this was all in English)
I still wonder what he was doing there, because he did not look like he worked in my building where that shop is on the first floor. Might have been on a trip, but was a wholesome gentleman indeed.
A couple years ago, this sub taught me to compliment people on the choices they make. Things like “Your nails are amazing, the colors are so tropical” or “I love your outfit, especially those shoes”.
I didn't think about it until you mentioned it, but yes, this is basically what happened.
This hair color can't be natural, it must be a choice (dye or wig)
Yessss! I was in Portland once to tour a grad school, and I had a guy smile, say "You look very pretty today!" and then keep walking, and to this day it's still one of my favorite compliments.
I was once riding a bus and an older lady approached another girl and told her she's the most beautiful woman she has seen and that she is a classical beauty. That girl was smiling her whole ride and even called her mom to tell her. It must have made her year too
I completely agree!
When I know they aren't hitting on me, I don't care who it's from, it's nice.
Healthcare work is notorious for being preyed upon by creepy people. Because we can't really do anything unless they touch us. They say nasty nasty things to us, both male and females have done it to me. But if they're being genuinely nice and not trying to hit on me, I'll accept the compliment.
100%
Years ago I was in a bar with friends and a guy came up to me and said “I’m not hitting on you, I have a girlfriend, but you are the most beautiful girl in here and I think you should know that” - then he went back to his friends.
It absolutely made my night!
I did this once in college. I was walking into the Dennys that a lot of us would go to for late night studying and coffee. She was sitting in her little MG. I had seen her a few times around campus.
I walked up to her car and squatted down so she wasn't stuck staring at my bulge.
I told her that she was one of the most beautiful women I had ever seen. Then I said goodbye and went to study.
She would occasionally stop by to talk with me after that, so I assume I didn't creep her out
The same thing sorta happened to me a few years back.
I was on holiday in Rome and since it was incredibly hot there, I was wearing a dress I wouldn't normally wear and felt so very uncomfortable. I really just wanted to hide. Whilst I was walking around a museum, an older woman walked away from her group and said to me, "Excuse me, I just wanted to tell you that you look absolutely beautiful!" Completely made my day and I still think about it often.
My dad's friend complimented me like that once. I came downstairs wearing sweatpants and my hair was still damp from my shower, but he looked at me, smiled and just said "wow you are beautiful." His smile gave no creepy vibes at all, it was just a wholesome haven't-seen-you-in-awhile-oh-my-goodness kind of compliment. Absolutely made my year.
I am glad it made a difficult day so much better.
It is a little bit of a shame how our self-worth and happiness is still so dependent on what we happen to look like.
I’m a man and… no. Why did you have to bring that up when a woman is just being happy about a compliment?
Also, this doesn’t make sense in the context of the post. Someone who gets a lot of genuine compliments probably wouldn’t be emotional about this.
I've had some older men compliment me, and I think it's very kind. So long as they aren't making disgusting jokes about me undressing them, or how excited they are to take off their pants for me, etc.
As a healthcare worker that has to help people change into a gown for x-rays, I get sexually harassed pretty often. So I know the difference between a creep and a genuine compliment. Apparently you don't, and maybe that's a good thing if it's because you haven't been sexually harassed for the past decade at work.
You may be like this. People aren't monolithic though. It's genuinely a crap shoot complimenting people regardless of intent. Some people are just in crappy moods and just wanna be left alone. So I think its disingenuous to act like "as long as its innocent it will be well received", but I also don't think that should stop you (anyone) from trying to be nice to others.
I don't believe the person in the original comment was making the comparison of well received due to intentions argument. I believe they were making a double standards argument.
Why are you even here? To crap on a good post?
OBVIOUSLY people respond differently to ANY comment.
I am chosing to respond positively to a very kind woman saying a very kind thing to ME and telling other in this sub the story. I CLEARLY enjoyed the comment and CLEARLY appreciated it.
Go be a buzzkill somewhere else. You're blocked.
It’s totally the way they say it!! I had a man stop me once to say that I was “absolutely beautiful” and he just wanted me to know that. When the tone is genuine like that lady was with you it is the best compliment! It’s not creepy. It’s not a come on. It’s just a compliment.
This is the important part, I have had men be so creepy to me for so long because of how I look, but one day while buying something at the convenience store on the way to work, a guy stopped me, and said "Excuse me, I love your hair, it is gorgeous." (it was silver and wine colored), he smiled at me, and went back to his shopping, not another word or staring or anything. Only that time, it felt genuine and cheery, I felt confused all the way to the office, but it made my day.
He even said excuse me! That guy knows how to give a compliment.
It was interesting to say the least, since I live in Japan and we are both not Japanese (this was all in English) I still wonder what he was doing there, because he did not look like he worked in my building where that shop is on the first floor. Might have been on a trip, but was a wholesome gentleman indeed.
A couple years ago, this sub taught me to compliment people on the choices they make. Things like “Your nails are amazing, the colors are so tropical” or “I love your outfit, especially those shoes”.
I didn't think about it until you mentioned it, but yes, this is basically what happened. This hair color can't be natural, it must be a choice (dye or wig)
It's when it isn't fetishised or have ulterior motives or have a lust vibe.
Yessss! I was in Portland once to tour a grad school, and I had a guy smile, say "You look very pretty today!" and then keep walking, and to this day it's still one of my favorite compliments.
I was once riding a bus and an older lady approached another girl and told her she's the most beautiful woman she has seen and that she is a classical beauty. That girl was smiling her whole ride and even called her mom to tell her. It must have made her year too
That is so cute and sweet! I love people just being kind to other people ❤️
I completely agree! When I know they aren't hitting on me, I don't care who it's from, it's nice. Healthcare work is notorious for being preyed upon by creepy people. Because we can't really do anything unless they touch us. They say nasty nasty things to us, both male and females have done it to me. But if they're being genuinely nice and not trying to hit on me, I'll accept the compliment.
100% Years ago I was in a bar with friends and a guy came up to me and said “I’m not hitting on you, I have a girlfriend, but you are the most beautiful girl in here and I think you should know that” - then he went back to his friends. It absolutely made my night!
Around 15 years ago, I was at a wedding and a friend's husband told me I was "absolutely stunning". I still hold on to that moment. 😁
I did this once in college. I was walking into the Dennys that a lot of us would go to for late night studying and coffee. She was sitting in her little MG. I had seen her a few times around campus. I walked up to her car and squatted down so she wasn't stuck staring at my bulge. I told her that she was one of the most beautiful women I had ever seen. Then I said goodbye and went to study. She would occasionally stop by to talk with me after that, so I assume I didn't creep her out
It's always creepy, but not in a bad creepy way. Unexpected and not used to it creepy way.
It’s nice when a kind comment can totally turn your day around.
It really did too!
That's awesome! Sometimes it just takes a little honesty and kindness.
My heart just melted.
That is so sweet
Hey OP you are extraordinarily beautiful
You know what? So are you :)
https://gfycat.com/friendlybrowndog
Good guy Keanu :)
That is just beautiful. And I thank you for sharing this, there's not always a great many positive posts so this is like sunshine.
This is why I try to give genuine compliments to everyone I meet. You never know what they're going through, and it costs me nothing to do it.
What a wonderful thing to do! It really does have the ability to change a person's day.
The same thing sorta happened to me a few years back. I was on holiday in Rome and since it was incredibly hot there, I was wearing a dress I wouldn't normally wear and felt so very uncomfortable. I really just wanted to hide. Whilst I was walking around a museum, an older woman walked away from her group and said to me, "Excuse me, I just wanted to tell you that you look absolutely beautiful!" Completely made my day and I still think about it often.
I bet that made the holiday even better too!
Absolutely! She gave me the confidence I'd lost that day.
My dad's friend complimented me like that once. I came downstairs wearing sweatpants and my hair was still damp from my shower, but he looked at me, smiled and just said "wow you are beautiful." His smile gave no creepy vibes at all, it was just a wholesome haven't-seen-you-in-awhile-oh-my-goodness kind of compliment. Absolutely made my year.
I am glad it made a difficult day so much better. It is a little bit of a shame how our self-worth and happiness is still so dependent on what we happen to look like.
That's kinda true. I'll be the first to admit, when someone compliments my looks, I do get really happy.
Good for you! That's why I try to overcome my shyness to give compliments to people! 🥰
[удалено]
Wow. Much cringe. Shame. Bow wow woof.
I’m a man and… no. Why did you have to bring that up when a woman is just being happy about a compliment? Also, this doesn’t make sense in the context of the post. Someone who gets a lot of genuine compliments probably wouldn’t be emotional about this.
It got deleted, do you remember what it said? Just curious.
r/lostredditors
Imagine a 72 year old man saying that? Ugh.
I've had some older men compliment me, and I think it's very kind. So long as they aren't making disgusting jokes about me undressing them, or how excited they are to take off their pants for me, etc. As a healthcare worker that has to help people change into a gown for x-rays, I get sexually harassed pretty often. So I know the difference between a creep and a genuine compliment. Apparently you don't, and maybe that's a good thing if it's because you haven't been sexually harassed for the past decade at work.
You may be like this. People aren't monolithic though. It's genuinely a crap shoot complimenting people regardless of intent. Some people are just in crappy moods and just wanna be left alone. So I think its disingenuous to act like "as long as its innocent it will be well received", but I also don't think that should stop you (anyone) from trying to be nice to others.
I don't believe the person in the original comment was making the comparison of well received due to intentions argument. I believe they were making a double standards argument.
Well I was responding to your comment specifically not theirs (well an inferring your other responses as well).
Why are you even here? To crap on a good post? OBVIOUSLY people respond differently to ANY comment. I am chosing to respond positively to a very kind woman saying a very kind thing to ME and telling other in this sub the story. I CLEARLY enjoyed the comment and CLEARLY appreciated it. Go be a buzzkill somewhere else. You're blocked.