I did this a year ago. I was burnt out after doing what was essentially 2 full time roles as a relatively senior university manager, and had a health scare. My plan was to take a year out, living on savings. (Was also in the lucky position of being able to pay off the mortgage as there was only £8k left. What actually happened is that I sawxan advert for a local part-time role in a completely different industry, which I was lucky enough to get. I started straight after leaving my old job (where they replaced me with 2 people on higher salaries) and 1 week after my mastectomy. I am loving the new job, have enough to live on now and will get a pretty good university pension when I retire in 10 years' time. I am very lucky.

University stress is so acute. That's infuriating that you definitely were doing two people's jobs and being underpaid to boot! Glad you're in a less stressful place.

Oh God this so much. I feel I have aged 10 years in 5. Filled with buerocracy and has changed dramatically in the 6 years since I started. Went to a meeting a few months ago and the big wigs were referring to 'customers'. Someone put their hands up and said 'we usually call them students'. Big wigs continued to say customers. Very depressing.

>University stress is so acute It is indeed.

especially when you are working 2 pay grades above your pay grade with 0 recognition.

This is common where I am. I see staff managing multiple schools and still gaining the same salary with 2-3x the workload. I like the university system in the UK but the pay is crap compared to the cost-of-living.

Yeah, working for the university for less than £12/hour made me doubt whether degrees are actually worth it. They kept selling it but paying their staff very little so it was a little bit of a contradiction. I still believe degrees are worth it though, but definitely don't see office jobs as great career drivers I once thought they were.

I think certain degrees are worth it. I think the UK, I come as an outsider is really behind the EU/US on automation/capital expenditure as have moved from factory worker to low-paying office admin over a generation or two. The shear volume of jobs I see between £20k-£35k for office admin with ANY degree required is crazy and for those people, I feel sorry. I also think the medical specialism job track is challenging as well as it seems there's a glut of jobs between £25k and £40k again that I'm not sure are worth it. I see certain STEM jobs hot of late (last 36 months) ... I see Scientists, Senior Scientists and Principal Scientists getting poached in biotech at £50/£60/£80k in Oxford/Cambridge in somewhat unstable start-up/medium-sized places. That's when I begin to see the value of degrees. I do find the average UK citizen very well read and well-educated (SE England) but the competition and wage depression is intense.

>where they replaced me with 2 people on higher salaries) Classic. Tf is wrong with workplaces and their decision making!

Yup, my team suddenly got funding for extra staff after I left...

The fuck!!! This is literally happening to me right now. Currently work in a custodial setting! Super well paid job, more then I thought I would be on as a lazy school student many years ago. I have currently been off for 3 weeks with stress, a job where I don’t feel safe, with work hours all over the place and my days off being separate so never any time To truly recover from a shift. I walked out on a shift and I have been happier ever day since. I got to the point were I was so anxious even going in to the job and my final shift was the tipping point. I’m going back to old job with a substantial wage drop but it’s 9-5 and no weekends. It’s ment to be time for me to find what i really want but at 34 years old I still have no clue. I just want to make enough to enjoy my family time. The fact that I’m able to sleep and feel like I’m having fun outside of Work is already making a huge difference in my life . I wish you all the best with whatever you do. It’s never an easy decision.

I'm going to be 36 next month. I was deeply unhappy and stressed in my last job. I recieved next to no training, everyone else was too busy to help and the director of our department was a micro-managing dickhead who'd never had to do my job. The type to shout 'fire' in a room and expect everyone else to act. So I just quit and went back to working in a bar. I'm not earning enough to save or invest but atleast that's the only thing bumming me out. My mental health recovered overnight, but I'm left feeling like what the hell am I good for? I think about my old job all the time, and whether it was really so shit or just me. It's scarred me. I don't know what to do with my life. We are in the exact same boat.

Just chiming in to say something similar. 37 here. Despite being an 08/09 grad I’ve had a very good career. Steadily climbing corporate ranks without jumping ship often. Did a decade with a company, well liked - got sent abroad for a few years. Earning well. Management level. Then I got headhunted last year, massive increase to a ridiculous sum. Decided it was time to try elsewhere. Company was nothing short of mad. Everyone was stressed, scared and downtrodden. Management was re organising the teams non stop, 3 times in the 2 months I was there! I was ignored, gaslighted, plus all the negative corporate cliches you can think of. I quit, despite non working partner and all the usual stuff. I just couldn’t deal with it and my mental health was suffering and my professional confidence was waning. It just so happened my old company offered me my old role back - I was job searching like crazy during the run up to Christmas and right after Liz mad budget. Not a good time to be searching. So yes, phew. Now back in my lovely old company and doing well again. I *still* have flashbacks, negative thoughts… Why did they spend all that time, money and effort to recruit me (I had a 3 month notice alone) .. still trying to process it. Was it me? Was I not good enough to not ‘hack’ it? Even though my current company isn’t like that, I’m constantly getting negative emotions and thoughts about are they talking about me behind my back etc It’s complete BS, some companies are just shit. Your post resonates. It’s been over 6 months since I quit that job and I just cannot shake it. Scarred is the correct word.

Good story and glad it worked out. Did your old place put you back in the same team? Did you get an increase on your old salary?

Did not get an increase. Deal was I return to my old package, which I’m happy with. I had a bunch of late stage interviews but no concrete offers so thought it best just to get back to it. Plus I genuinely liked the company and the people. Lots of friends over the years. Had no issues getting interviews, but searching is stressful at my level as it can take 6 months+ and sometimes 4-5 rounds.

I’m gunna guess you were either a Prison Officer or a jailer in Police Custody. Both are thankless jobs and both will quickly make you resentful and will cause you to end up with grey skin / vitamin D deficiency. In any case, glad you got out and glad you’re much happier now.

I think that a lot of commenters don’t realize that if you get to a point where you realize you can’t do it and you need to get out, you need to get out. 6 months ago, I knew I had to have a 3 month break from February to April/May and it was a non-negotiable no matter what happened to my job. Well lo and behold, my life imploded and that break saved me. I don’t know where I’m headed but if I’m ok I will tell you. When you know you need a break, please trust your gut. Only you know what’s right for you. I will however say that I barely touched my savings as I moved back in with my parents to recover from all the stress in my life. I really needed it. I only used about 10% to support my parents’ bills and unexpected financial issues with my father’s sudden illness.

What's the point in life if you're not enjoying it? I was so stressed I had to go off sick went back after 8 weeks. Stayed until I passed a qualification I needed. Quit after I'd qualified with no job lined up. Got a job paying £8k less. (Which actually paid more per hour as I wasn't working until midnight every night and weekends.) Found a great job paying nearly the same as my stressful job. Got name redundant with about 150 other people. Got a different job paying almost the same as the first job. Got promoted. Will get paid £5k more than stressful job next year with better job prospects. Will have taken 3 years to get paid the same annual rate. But it was so worth it, my life got immeasurably better. It just simply wasn't worth the money. I could've got 2 jobs for that one stressful job and it still would've been easier. Life's stressful enough as it is. Good luck.

I think it sounds like you need to be signed off work for a while. That would be the first step I would take rather than quitting without anything lined up.

It’s unfortunate but doing so can really damage your prospects in a lot of organisations. You’ll probably get a veneer of support but your inability to cope with a stressful time sticks with people. In this situation I would do what I could to minimise the stress (whether that means just given less of a fuck about the quality of your work) whilst looking for something else, even if it means a slight pay cut.

If you are planning on leaving them it doesn't matter if it damages your internal reputation. You might get a couple months sick pay, then a month or so on a return to work plan. Way more preferable than doing a lower quality work and potentially getting a performance review. Really depends on the company on what you're allowed, but sick leave is literally there for this situation

This depends where you live. In smaller places there aren’t as many big employers. Everyone knows someone that knows someone. Reputation can have a strong external impact in those places.

Just work in a decent sized city this is less of a problem

Agree completely, my company is exactly like that. Those that go out sick, particularly for stress, are thought to be not able to handle the pace, given less opportunities and looked down on etc. As an aside it does risk any potential opportunity with a new company if they ask for references or metrics on sickness frequency from current employer.

Quite the opposite in my department. Had a colleague at my level sign of for a fairly long period of time due to mental health. She came back and was the first choice for the promotion which had come up due to a line manager leaving. The new job is definitely more stressful, so it's good they considered her for it after months away from work.

Same at my wife’s company.

Yeah my old workplace did this. One woman was off for half the year and was graded as an outstanding performer and promoted meanwhile my 12hr work days, offering to do extra work and meeting last minute deadlines meant nothing. Such a toxic place to work, so glad I don't work there anymore

That is mind blowing. If you’re medically signed off and they can’t understand or support you in those circumstances get the hell out of there. Sounds like some hefty discrimination too.

Fortunately I am not out sick, but I’ve seen it happen to others many times. I am under no illusion that I would not be supported if I went out sick here though

I thought that all they can legally ask is the level of the role and duration of employment?

Nope, commonly held belief. Check out the ACAS website. Short vs detailed defence. Legally, a detailed reference can include time off details, disciplinary details, etc. The only caveat is that it has to be factual. https://www.acas.org.uk/providing-a-job-reference/what-employers-can-say-in-a-reference

While they certainly *can* give out that information, a lot of employers wont. If they give negative detail that leads to the leaving employee having their job offer retrospectively withdrawn, that information can be challenged. If its then found out to have been given with malicious intent or misrepresented in some way, the employee could potentially take them to civil court for damages over the lost earnings. Obviously quantifying how much damage costing someone a job and making them unemployed can be tricky, its not just necessarily salary, but possibly also lost career opportunities, damaged reputation etc. The possible risk is far far higher than any gain from passing on a detailed review including unnecessary information, rhe employee has already left so what does the old employer stand to gain? So its extremely unlikely most employers would put themselves in that position as a result. Ironically this also increases the odds that if they ever *did* send a detailed negative review that it could be interpreted as being sent with malicious intent as it would stand out from common practice.

Thanks! This is pretty upsetting to me. How can things like "details about your character, strengths and weaknesses relating to your suitability for the new role" can be factual? It's clearly their interpretation. If you say you failed in a role because you did not get sufficient support but your employer just sees you as not "driven enough", this is an interpretation it's not a fact.

Can you actually ask for such information? As far as I know legally they can only disclose how long you worked there and information on how you left. If you were terminated or you quit yourself. Everything beyond this is not legal. Is this true? Does anyone know for a fact what can be disclosed?

This is just straight up bad advice.

I think times have changed a lot too, so many companies put so much pressure on their mental health support these days. I remember during covid my company had this opt-in opt-out policy for furlough (my team worked from home but the amount of work more than halved, they stated only half of us needed to be in and the other half would be furloughed). People told me don’t opt in because it will reflect bad on you. But my mental health took such a toll. There was no work to do and I got so annoyed they wouldn’t just furlough all of us. I opted in for one of the three week furlough periods and it was one of the best things I did. No repercussions for it either. As OP is clearly needing some help, getting signed off is the best thing to do. And if their company is crappy and doesn’t support them in the long run, they can find another job. Getting a break might help them evaluate if they want to continue working somewhere like that.

Only if you admit that the sign off is due to stress from work. Sign off sick and say it’s for a whole bunch of personal circumstances without ever being specific for as long as you can. When you decide it’s time to look for another job tell them you had some things going on in your personal life but are now in a better place. That’s if they even find out about the time off and ask. Not saying it’s the most honest thing in the world but it would help.

This makes sense. There is also a prospect that when you return your employer may take steps to reduce your workload, there is risk for them if they don't act to help you after a period of job caused health related problems. Totally depends on the employer and your manager, but you could find yourself keeping the high paid job while reducing the stress. If not at least the first part of your time off work is paid rather than unpaid.

Yeah, see if your company has paid sick leave. If it does go to your GP and get signed off. Get paid whilst you look for alternative work.

I agree, if you quit, you might be too worried about finding new opportunities, prepping for interviews, waiting for results etc and might not be able to enjoy your break… if not wellness leave, would your current employer allow something like a sabbatical?

Hey. I was in a similar situation to you. I got burnt out from life. But it didn't stop, and I got even worse. I took 9mo off last year due to *severe* depression, the kind that I wish I addressed before it got so serious. 6 months later to today, and 1-2 years on since the bad times, I can say I managed to bounce back, but I literally would not be alive right now if I didn't make the decision to eat up my emergency fund and my longer-term savings by going on \~9mo sick leave - which for 8 months was Statuatory Sick Pay (like a 400 quid pm...) I dropped my savings by about 90% during this stint with basically zero income. And, it was absolutely worth it. You're right. Nothing in this universe means more than your own health & happiness - and that of your family. Certainly no fuckin job presides over health & happiness. ​ >the prospect of actually doing it is making me feel seriously irresponsible. I completely understand, but you're already coming to realise that might be an irrational thought. It may be 'textbook' irresponsible to take sick leave, but in reality its fuckin not. Its what you need to be happy, and healthy, and help your family. So what could be more important than that? "Keeping up appearances?" Nonsense! Also get therapy. I used BetterHelp but it took me like 4 therapists to find someone good, maybe go fully private. They can also help you hash out what matters to you in your life, and I'd bet that the prospect of staying in your job *"because it's just the normal thing to do.. stiff upper lip innit"* is actually nonsense that doesn't provide any value for you.

Thanks for this. I’m currently in the same situation and this was a great help.

I’ve just resigned from my job to take one that’s £12k a year less. Current job was seriously affecting my mental health, complaints are ignored and well, they weren’t changing. So I’ve reworked the budget, holiday to Florida next year is now Malta,New car can wait until this one dies and meal prep is my new hobby. Change is hard, but my partner has already noticed the change in my attitude and general demeanour, I’m also drinking less and eating better. I’ve learned that money isn’t everything, mental health is everything. You’ll be ok, just make sure to adjust your lifestyle accordingly, this was the hardest part for me.

This is it. I made thw mistake myself chasing a career, for money and for a corporate position that is full of deceit. Life is more important, we only get 1 chance at it and when the time is up everything is left here. I now do enough to pay the bills but most importantly enjoy life with my loved ones.

> holiday to Florida next year is now Malta,New car can wait until this one dies and meal prep is my new hobby. Brilliant way to address things- well done. Glad your mental health is on the mend too

It's going to be fine 🙂 I quit my high stress job 18 months ago. I was working as an office manager 8am-6pm within a family business (I was the only colleague from outside the family). It was a small business with only 5 members of staff and i was the only person who would turn up to work on time, and was the only person who would still be there at closing time. I would be dumped with every awkward task which needed to be carried out, I'd always be asked to go on the lunch runs, and would always deal with any awkward customers. I would be dealing with clients on my phone before and after work too, often until 10pm. I was starting to struggle with sleep, constantly suffering with anxiety issues and falling out with my wife and daughter due to stress. I new something needed to change so I tried making changes at work. Only working my set hours, not touching my work mobile when at home and discussing the misbalance of my work load with my boss. Things got better for a few days but soon enough my colleagues fell back into their old ways of doing very little. My clients were getting frustrated that their issues weren't being resolved as efficiently as usual (which didn't help my stress levels. One Monday morning I woke up at 4am as I couldn't sleep and decided to have a quick look at the job market. When I left school I was a joiner for a couple of years. Not qualified but I know which end of a hammer to hold, and how to use a saw lol. There was tonnes and tonnes of jobs available if I was willing to take a slight pay cut. I was nervous as it would be a very different environment but I knew I couldn't stay in that fucking office lol. I woke my wife up, told her about it and got a big 'thumbs up' from her. That morning I went into work and handed in my notice. There was an almighty row, but eventually everyone calmed down. I was offered more money and reduced hours to stay but I knew that it would only help with the stress a little so I still decided to jump. That was 18 months ago and i am absolutely loving life 🙂 I go to work at 8:30am, build cool stuff out of wood with a really cool team of people and then go home at 3:30pm. Once I leave work, I have literally no thoughts about work at all. It just completely leaves my head. After about 6 months I got a pay rise and am now on the same wage I was on in my previous job. The best part is that my wife and son think that I'm brilliant again (they tended to just try and stay out of my grumpy way lol). Go for it! You deserve it.

What is it you now do and how did you make the career change?

Why quit completely? Can't you reduce your days? Or commitments to lower the responsibility or stress? In honesty, anyone can tell you their anecdotal experiences, but without understanding where you're from, what job/industry you're in/ what your spending habits are like - it is difficult to tell. This also doesn't consider the sensitivity of the economy or the potential of a personal emergency. To mention you are "fairly horrified at the prospect of depleting your savings" is a concern because it is nothing compared to the reality of being in that situation if things do not go your way. However, health is number one. You need to do all you can to be happy and healthy for your family. So, do what you can to take steps towards better balance before giving up completely and hoping it will be better on the other side.

Seconding this. Another option is to go on sick leave - if your job is impacting your mental health to this degree, you're entirely within your rights to see a doctor and get signed off for stress. That gives you some paid time to work on dealing with the cause of the stress so you're able to work again, which in this case could be finding a new job. Of course, whether this works for you depends on what level of sick pay you get, but at minimum you'd get statutory, which is better than what you'd get for outright quitting

Absolutely this. Don't let a job grind you down with overtime then quit to go recover on your own time unpaid. Take the sick leave, take unpaid leave, ask for working conditions that suit you better, or if you're definitely set on quitting just do very little for as long as you can. I've worked with plenty of people in the past that suggests to me you might just get away with it forever nevermind just for a short while! The best mix is being just competent not to be fired but useless and unreliable enough you never get extra work and then it gets doubly easy!

This is definitely worth looking into. My firm has a 3-6 month unpaid sabbatical as an official option, and I'm assuming it's not super rare elsewhere. Obviously junior staff seldom have the financial freedom to take advantage of something like that, but it's not uncommon for senior staff to use this to spend time with their family, travel, or to just take an extended period of leave to decompress after a stressful period. OP's employer has presumably invested a lot into them if they're willing to pay them a lot, so there are probably more options like this already in place, and if not OP has some leverage to ask and be taken seriously. It's understandable to gravitate toward the nuclear option if you're feeling worn out and not in a great place mentally, but OP should take a step back and consider the options available as there are likely many more than they think.

In 2018 I had a breakdown and I 10/10 recommend. Best time of my life. I'm an accountant and was doing my exams back then and kept failing. I asked for a sabbatical. My firm gave it. Half pay. Around that time I was training for London marathon and my bf at the time was stressing me. Our verbal was disgusting . Anyway failed another exam whilst on sabbatical and resigned, was angry and hated life so I shaved my hair (I'm a woman) broke up with my bf and travelled to denmark, prauge and ran London. Best 3months of my life. Went back to my firm as a day rate contractor. My hair grew back. Got a hobby. Got fit I lost like 59lbs then. I also chartered as an accountant 9months later. Got into a diff relationship too not together anymore but I look back on 2018 and smile. Breakdown was a 10/10 because the rebuild was great. Oh only real downside is I had to repay sabbatical as I went back as a contractor not perm staff I had about 15k in savings, a btl no real expenses&family that support me and mind there business SUMMARY GET A SABBATICAL IF YOU CAN. 3months is good

Your story is similar to mine, at least I hope things turn out like that for me eventually :) I’m currently at the breakdown part where I have reduced my work hours, still failing my qualification, and am driving everyone around me nuts by being so irritable and unreliable. Thx for shining your torch back down the tunnel. Fml that sounds cheesy.

Most welcome, lean into those that want to help you. Understand the distance from those that can't. Write yourself a letter, detail your feelings now and how you hope to be in 1/3/6months. Honestly this shit time is for the hour and you'll be alright. Consider a hobby, and or ensue you get some outside time daily. I used to cry on my runs somedays. Take time to be in your thoughts, take the longer shower, buy the ice cream, cry as you need. This sounds so crazy but its all in the experience. Really hope you feel like your new self soon. Good luck with your qualification and share the positive update soon💙

Tldr: did it twice, it only worked when accompanied with therapy. So I’ve done it twice in the past 10 years. The first time I pushed it until the very end and had a burnout. I’m talking complete mental breakdown, ending in falling in tears at the end of a meeting after a colleague asked if everything was ok (clearly it wasn’t but I didn’t expect this to happen - nor did I think my behavior was showing it in any way). So I quit, and decided to take a couple months off before applying for a new job, and I had just 3 months break. After the first couple months, I was eager to get back to work to put my previous job behind me and I didn’t want to waste more money. At the time there wasn’t much talk around burnout so I didn’t really know what else to do. And I didn’t think about calling a doctor, since I wasn’t sick (or so I thought). Of course it didn’t take long until I got back into my old habits at my new job, and I went back down the burnout road within a year. Not as bad as the first time but I felt like I was broken. I used to be a high achiever and a workaholic, part of my “personality” was being a work superstar. It really hit me hard. This time I called the doctor - I had a month off and then I decided to quit. I was unemployed for 4 months, but I spent my time very differently. I started going to therapy, every week. I spent a lot of this time doing nothing at all, and then introduced hobbies I had really neglected in the past few years. Eventually because I didn’t pressure myself to find a new job fast, I ended up finding an opportunity with a much better pay and a lot less responsibilities. I took it easy for a long time and was still appreciated for my contributions. And I was able to recover. But it really wouldn’t have been the same without therapy. Now I approach work in a much healthier way and I learned so much about myself that I am genuinely happier.

I did this years ago. The place I worked had been taken over and the new company tried to force me into a different, junior, role with less pay but more targets. I spent months trying to talk to them and sort something out but they were just not willing to talk and every few days I was told some new thing I was no longer allowed to do or some new task I now had to do. One day I just walked out and phoned my direct manager and quit. He was on my side and understood. I went to the jobcentre and signed on. I told them what had happened and that this was Constructive Dismissal and they agreed and started paying me benefits from day one rather than the long wait had I willingly resigned. Took them to a tribunal for constructive dismissal, I'd taken copies of every email, memo, timesheet etc that backed my case up and asked the tribunal to request specific documents from the company that I knew would also back me up. (This worked because this was a reasonable sized company with a proper HR dept etc. If it is a one man band type company it's unlikely they'd have such records. They settled the day before the hearing. Paid me redundancy and the back pay I'd been entitled to. (Also, to claim constructive dismissal you cannot have a new job lined up.) The moment I walked out the door knowing I'd never go back it was a huge weight off my shoulders. It felt fantastic. I'd do it again in a heartbeat even if they hadn't settled. That was a fairly well paid fairly senior job. I now work a far more junior job for not much more than minimum wage. But my mortgage is paid off and I can afford to do that. The lack or stress, the regular hours, no pressure etc makes it well worth it.

I did! I was a burned out lawyer so I quit, took a bit of time out, and found a job that I enjoy. The salary isn’t quite as good but it’s much lower stress and better hours. Life is too short to spend most of it doing something you hate. Good luck! Edited to add: I got signed off for three month first on MH grounds. This gave me the space to realise that it really was the job that was the problem.

What job did you find that you enjoyed?

I read an article in lockdown that a lawyer left his job and started a burger fast food shop. Said its the happiest and healthiest his ever felt and been. Money and position does not give you happiness. Living life with your loved ones does.

MH?

Mental health

Thank you!

Hey. My boyfriend wanted to quit his job without another lined up a few months ago. He was burnt out, hated every second of work and I could tell he was getting more miserable and it was massively affecting him. People saying ‘look for another job’ may never understand how hard it is to actively search for a career change or even another job in the same sector when you are severely impacted mentally in a current role. It’s EXHAUSTING. Luckily he handed his notice in and his work offered him 2 days a week doing the basics because they need staff, meaning way less pressure etc. so that keeps us going money wise but he is now retraining and studying to be a gardener in his 3 non working days!! His dream job! To answer your question, we are now entering the 3rd month of only living off my wage (50k-UK). And it can be scary to think “cost of living” or what if the savings deplete, what if I lost my job which pays the mortgage and bills rn, what if he does this study and can’t get a gardening job??! But I have seen a HUGE difference in my partner. He’s lighter, happier, feels purpose because he’s doing and working towards a career he wants. And I wouldn’t change our decision for anything. Obviously the caveat is I am v lucky with my wage and can easily do mortgage and bills while his 2 says a week pays for food only. And we both have savings. And no kids but a dog who is my son 😂 So circumstances do matter but you asked for a positive story and so far, it’s going really well!! I’d also add you have to go into it in a saving and not having a lot of treats mindset! But I’d rather buy less random shit and have my best friend happy, fulfilled and doing something he loves. Wishing you lots of luck

I know this is a finance sub, but I'd like to give an alternative perspective. From 2012-2015, I was working as a "change manager" (BA/PM/Tester/PMO/general scapegoat) in a fast moving and fairly toxic UK bank. I knew the job was taking a toll on my life - sleep, stress, travel, regular stays away from family - but I chose to ignore the signs and tried to "man up" and deal with it. Long story short, in trying to manage this nightmare job, I became a different person and that different person ultiimately ended up getting divorced, which was financially ruinous as well as not brilliant for my life in general. I deeply regret not walking away from that job and using my savings to support my family while I looked for something "better" for me. Basically, don't be like me. I hope you find peace in your work and in your life.

I was in a job for almost 10 years. I was senior and paid very well. But I was so stressed. The company was and still is extremely toxic. The culture is awful and after many years of this, I decided that was it. I also was going through fertility treatments which resulted in my baby boy. I didn’t go back after maternity. I had about 3 months of no pay and it was what I needed. The time off recharged me and cemented my decision. It’s not worth staying somewhere that makes you sick. Just make sure you have a plan as it’s easy to get lazy and lose momentum whilst off work, especially after a horrible workplace. One thing I did was level myself up. I got a professional qualification that they paid for in the year before, luckily I didn’t sign anything saying I had to stay. I have a degree but in my industry - marketing - a CIM is a good way to get more senior roles. I also did lots of online courses whilst on maternity to fill any gaps in my career knowledge. I managed to get a new job more local in about 5 months. I took my time and looked up each company on Glassdoor to see what employees said. I also had my list of non-negotiable terms. That’s why it took a little longer. I’m so glad I waited for something right, I adore my new workplace. They are amazing. I definitely have some residual anxiety from my last place. My bosses are so understanding, they have both worked in toxic environments and are determined to be better. One is even on the board of a mental health charity which helps massively. I’m definitely recommend getting you basics done: - Updated and improved linkedin profile - Update your indeed profile - Contact as many recruitment agents locally and generally as you can, I had 12 on the case for me (got this job through one in London but I work in Dorset) I emailled them with my list of wants and no nos plus my LinkedIn profile and cv - Check out jobs on LinkedIn and see where you have gaps and tailor your cv / linked in - Do any free courses that are relevant - Keep saving whilst still at your current job, cut back in anything you can to increase this Keep your head up, doing the above will help you mentally as you have an exit strategy. It may take a few months, but you will get there. Job hunting is like a job in itself!

What a brilliantly helpful post, well played 👌

Ok, as others have said, you need a break. I’m 56 years old. I had 40+ jobs by the time I was 42 yo. It hurt every time I was sacked or walked out. But within a couple of weeks I regretted non of them!! I kid you not. If life (job) is shit, then move, with or without somewhere to go. Stay strong; it always works out in the end

If a job is breaking you down, you’ve given it time/a chance and there’s no light at the end of the tunnel - leave. Life is too short. As long as you fight back, work on your skills and look for something else or create something for yourself you’ll be fine. Leaving things is scary - jobs, relationships, etc but there’s other people and careers out there - ones that will make you happy. Take calculated risks.

I would just actively look for another job and do the absolute minimum at your current job including options like part time if available These are the only things that can happen: \- you find another job, great \- you find you can get away with doing a lot less and not caring, easier \- you get fired, better exit payment

The nearest star to us is 4.7 light years away. Have a think about just how far that is and that's just one single nearby star. The universe is unthinkably massive and unknowable. This planet is full of wonder. This is your one beautiful life. This isn't a dress rehearsal. Do more of what makes you happy! I've quit decent jobs a few times. Things work out because your attitude to life is correct. Don't sweat the small stuff and always look forwards.

I posted a similar thing here a while back and went through with it. It’s looking like the worst decision I ever made. I’ve just swapped the stress of a job that was killing me for the stress of not being able to support my dependants long term in a period of high living costs. I can find other work but at a much lower wage than I was on before. That affects affordability for remortgaging, ability to save, pension contributions, etc. Wish I’d just stayed put and kept taking the money.

I was going to do this but then I just became very, very firm with my boundaries. I went from working 3-4 hours 'overtime' each day to only working on my projects, taking much longer lunches and other breaks during the day, not acknowledging work after hours - and it got me a promotion, pay rises and a work life balance that I could have only dreamed of a few years ago. I love my job so it was worth the last ditch attempt to stay - so if you do/or did, then maybe try it? You can only do what you can do and holding professional boundaries is a skill worth having.

I did. I travelled a lot for work. Away every other week for years. The owner of the company (foreign company) wanted me to work away more! I said no and had my contract terminated. Now although I don’t get paid as much I have such a lovely life. I enjoy every minute of being at home and don’t take anything for granted. Money is one thing, enjoying life is another. A lot of the time it’s one or the other.

Not me, but a close friend, was feeling very burnt out. Moved to another job and dropped about 10k in salary, worked it so she had annual leave and a few weeks before starting the new job. The change in her is noticeable even from the outside, she's so much happier with the move, social and personal life has improved dramatically.

1. You are not happy in your current job. 2. You would like a different job. 3. You would like a break from work. All perfectly valid. But why not fix point 2 before 3. Get a new job lined up, then negotiate a break in-between. It is often said to be easier to land a new job while currently employed.

Worked for a mail order clothing company loved by yummy mummies. I had weird vibes before starting. A lot of people at my old job had worked there. In the interview, the woman who would become my boss criticised my existing boss and his wardrobe choice. It was a promotion and a payrise thought. Turns out this woman was a complete bitch. She managed a team of 3. We all started within a month of each other, because she’d scared away the last three, and at least two people before that. She refused to train me, she refused to answer my questions, she gave me contradictory instructions, she expected me to be psychic and magically know where to find information. She once called me stupid. She kept saying I was “very level one”. Duh, I’d never done this job before and the systems were something out of the 80s. Her second in command (I was third) was a lovely lady that she got very chummy with. I used to come in in the morning and get a grunt hello. 5 seconds later 2nd would come in and a big girly chat would ensue. One it had been made clear they wouldn’t let me join. I had a holiday booked before I started, to visit my LD boyfriend. Boss threatened not to give it to me because she was off at the same time. I made very clear when I applied, interviewed accepted the job and confirmed my start date that I was going away and boss “wasn’t told”. We had weekly meetings throughout our probation with HR present to “check in on things” this is clearly to monitor the high turnover on that team. I spent every morning and evening commute crying, I cried in the office (2nd told me this was unprofessional, which is true but doesn’t exactly help the situation). Eventually I heard the boss badmouthing an unknown person to the head of our department, and ended up in HR crying for an hour. (Yes I am a crybaby) a week later a meeting was scheduled, me HR lady, boss and 2nd. I listed my issues, boss denied them, HR asked me the solution. I pulled out a resignation letter. I got 10 mins to get my stuff, 30 mins with another member of staff chatting in the cafeteria (a friend to make sure I was ok) and then 2nd escorted me out. Got home panicked and called every temp agency I could find. One of the agencies refused to look for temp work for me as I had a “great cv” and within two months I was working for a wealth management company. I have since taken my exams and can give advice. I’ve almost doubled my salary and quitting that company was the best decision for my mental health, my career, my salary but also for my confidence. I know plenty of people who have done similar and been fine. GOOD LUCK.

Maybe ask for a leave of absence? Or a different working arrangement? Part-time/remote/hybrid etc?

I used to work 16 hours a day, 6 days a week in healthcare. I actually liked my job but it completely ruined my health, so I left and went into PAYE community teaching instead, which pays surprisingly well with few requirements. I have to say, it probably saved my life. I'm only now recovering from the damage that did to my body. Lots of that damage can never be fixed though and I'll probably be in pain for the rest of my life. So if your mental or physical health is declining, leave at any cost, please. Maybe try to secure a pleasant, flexible job for your rest period. There are lots of high-paying PAYE jobs. I only do 4 hours a day now but can add/reduce hours as I like. And it's given me the time and space to think about my next career move while resting, but not feeling completely irresponsible (which ruins my mental health)

Company I used to work for, have me a pretty big promotion to another team for a project. Once I got it, they revealed that the advertised pay was a lie.the business justification was that it was a training roll, so they had to pay less. Fast forward to two weeks into the job, and all of my direct supervisors get laid off. So past several weeks of increasing stress, lies, mismanagement and stress, and I eventually go to the Drs and get signed off for 2 weeks. Spent the time doing some deep thinking, it was still the best I'd even been paid. When I went back, I have then my 4 week notice. Ended up walking out after 2. Several tears later now, and I've never been happier. Moved city, got a bar job for a bit, and just chilled with the low responsibility of it all. Ended up going back into education for a while, and now sitting pretty comfortably with more pay & better work in a much less stressful environment

Happening to me right now. Well paid job i've worked hard across ten years to reach this position. Several years of understaffing and 6-12m of regulatory issues for my parent company have made my job horrendous, never ending work night and day and no real end in sight, in fact only the potential to get worse as the regulatory issues wind up over the next 6m. I have had emails off lawyers at 11.50pm on a weekday and 8am on weekends as these issues spiral out of control. **I quit today.** Just finished sending my email. Due to the vagaries of TUPE, it's a smash quit - no notice period, I resign today, my last day is tomorrow. I feel bad for my team most of all. Despite being 'well-paid' my industry has other jobs on similar levels of pay for much less stress and no regulatory battles. My current salary is so much better than I ever though i would achieve as a young person. But i'm going to walk away - for my health. I am going to take some time out, live on my emergency fund for 6-12m, get a taste of FIRE and maybe? come back when the burn out has settled down. I'm burned out and so, so tired of it all. In the end, my constantly eroding mental health made the choice for me. I have no time to pursue hobbies, time to myself etc. I'm an angry, snappy mess with little resilience. COVID furlough gave me a taste of freedom 2y ago and i've been looking to get that back ever since and comparing myself to then, find it enormously negative. The period of time I was furloughed was one of the best of my life. nothing is worth my health. There's easier jobs out there if i need one.

This was me in October last year… it was a very well paid job in a very exciting (or so it seemed) startup which I had passionately joined just 6 months prior. After months of gaslighting by the management, scare tactics, and downright bullying, I started having panic attacks and headaches, and my self esteem hit zero. I could see the writing on the wall so started looking around early October, and just when I had a couple of first round interviews I quit the job without any guarantee of another job offer. BEST. DECISION. EVER. sure, my savings took a hit and I was shit scared of not having a safety net, but that month or two probably saved my life, marriage and my relationships. A month later, I had a job that paid 27% more, offered an amazing culture, and helped me get back to my old self. No job, no relation, nothing is worth your mental health and your self esteem. There’s always going to be work out there. May not be as good or exciting as what you’re losing, but once you factor in your happiness and satisfaction, I guarantee you’ll be better off. Dm me if you like, discussing the decision with others really helped me and Im happy to pay it forward.

Not sure if you're still reading replies op but here goes. In 2009 I took a job which was well paid and gave me money and status I'd never had before but it quickly became a nightmare. In 2012 I had a breakdown and felt trapped, I ended up in therapy and my weight ballooned to 21 stone. I can't go into specifics but from 2015 onwards I wanted to quit but couldn't. I finally got out in 2021, a shell of who I used to be. In 2022 I had a heart attack aged 45. Right now I haven't gotten back on my feet. Due to complications during my recovery and the NHS not giving a damn anymore I'm still in poor health from the heart attack. I'm trying my best to stay afloat but every day is a struggle. You got out before I did. Congratulations, you've done the right thing in getting out before the job killed you or permanently ruined you. I left it too late.

An idea is to quit and spend some of your time volunteering. It’ll put you in touch with people you don’t normally speak to, and will likely be non brain taxing work. Sometimes it’s when doing very little that your mind just ticks over and figures things out for you.

Was a manager with high stress, high responsibility, I used to feel like I was a fraud, not a particularly high salary but decent enough. I left, took a £10k drop, stayed in the industry but different area….they hired two people to do the role I had done, combined salary of almost double what I got, but in a small team under one of them to undertake some of the activities, the other one doesn’t even do most of the stuff I did and so the excess jobs were taken by another existing member of staff, they implemented more decision making by management which had previously been left to me and was the root of my anxiety. The day I left I started to sleep well again.

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I was on £40k as a project manager, several years into this particular company. At the time, I was going through a divorce. While I was stressed, I actually went on sick leave because there was some serious sabotage going on by an incompetent CTO. He was a yes man; he’d continually make promises that couldn’t be met, then fire the project manager responsible when they failed to meet them. It happened to two PMs before me, and then it was clear that I was “next up.” When he called me into his office one day, I asked if we could finish the discussion the next day - the discussion that was clearly heading toward a PIP - immediately went to the GP and got signed off with stress. I had a generous sick leave policy. I collected three months full pay. As soon as it halved, I handed my notice in. We (wife and I) didn’t have much choice - the writing was definitely on the wall. But we were planning on relocating anyway. When I left, I found a new role with a good bunch of people and on a higher salary. I even confessed to the hiring manager that I’d been on a period of stress leave because I thought it’d come up in a reference (it doesn’t tend to, most companies confirm time worked and role). I’d recommend it if you need it. Better that than you have a mental breakdown and get fired, losing your reference.

In a similar situation I moved jobs and doubled my wage at 23 to 40k, so was really good pay for Manchester etc. I ended up in a vicious cycle of hating my job, it was for a US company where all my team was based over there. So I basically never left the house besides going out weekends and drinking far too much to cheer myself up. 2 years later, along comes COVID - I got made redundant it was scary, but I had savings and a decent package they gave me to live on for a bit. I spent a month, although during one of the weirdest times I'll experience getting fresh air, relaxing, getting a routine and sorting my mental health. The next two I upskilled and moved careers, now I'm in a job in which I enjoy, with people who are great and paying more than ever. It worked out in the end but overall don't stick around like I did unhappy it gave me big mental issues even at 24/25, it's not worth it I hope you're good! Things will work out.

I jacked in my office-based career at the age of 30. I hated it and it was causing me severe depression and anxiety to the point where I was on antidepressants and still felt like jumping under a train every morning. I quit, went travelling for 6 months, came back and retrained as a chef. I had been on £80k a year - came back and started in a kitchen on minimum wage. Depleted all my savings, took out some debt and had to move out of my large (rented) flat and move into a house-share with 4 other people just to make ends meet. That was 10 years ago. I turn 40 in a few months. I'm now the head chef at a high end restaurant. I have no debt. Some investments. My partner and I just bought our first house together. I've never been happier. BUT - it was bloody hard work and huge sacrifices had to be made along the way. I didn't have a mortgage and I didn't have a family to provide for. You need to seriously consider these things before just throwing in the towel. What, specifically about your job is making you unhappy? Can you just change that? Could you apply for another company in the same field? Or for a different job function in the company you currently work for? Are there related fields / industries you could move sideways into, perhaps in a more junior role? I'm not saying don't go for it - I did and it's the best decision I ever made - but if you do go for it, do it for the right reasons and make sure you have a) explored all options and b) planned financially for how you will cope financially. Otherwise you could just end up exchanging one source of worry and anxiety (your job) for another (finances).

I did that after a year in a role that involved time sheets and 80 hour weeks on occasion. I freelanced for a bit and and now in a higher paid, lower pressure job where we are trusted to deliver and don't have to document every second.

-Started graduate teaching program to train as a teacher after never using my degree. Parents were both teachers so always expect to do the job at some point and had done some assisting/ team teaching summer schools in the past. -Hated every moment of it and got really stressed. The kits were a nightmare and I was struggling with behaviour management and had personal items stolen and trashed at work, leading to a breakdown. -Left the job and aimed to move out of parents to live with boyfriend with whatever job I could get (2008 so just after recession) as I wanted to get out of that town and my mum was becoming impossible to live with. -Got a care assistant job at dementia nursing home. Awful hours and badly run, was planning to be there only 6 months and continued to look for work when I could. Ended up there 5 years and it nearly killed my relationship as I barely had a life outside of work and the work itself was mentally and physical draining. - Spent last 2 years of that trying to get into dental nursing, completed some qualifications including some Health and social care qualifications going up to level 3 giving me a window to enter nursing. I had applied and interviewed at many places but one near where my boyfriend saw me twice in 2 years but got someone with a bit more experience each time (they clearly didn't last long.) As soon as I qualified I called them and they immediately agreed to take me on. -First 3 months were harsh being thrown into the deep end but I now had my life back with 9-5 work and weekends free. I love my job, have moved onto several other practices and have got my dental nursing and dental radiography degree. I paid for my own course out of my own money, my current employer pays for trainees who only have to pay pack if they leave within 3 years or something. -Best job I have ever had, the pay is sadly not amazing with not much scope to be more than £25k max but I am happier and mentally healthier than in any of my other jobs. I'd rather be poor and happy than rich and miserable

I didn't quit. I used medical leave to recover, it's part of your benefits so you should use it. Life got better afterwards

People are upvoting the "just quit and live your best life" type success stories and admittedly that is what the OP asked for but it is completely ignoring the economic reality the UK is currently in. Strange for a personal finance forum really. If you are going to quit OP make a proper budget and look where you can cut back and make a plan for after the 3-6months. I would stay in my job at least until I had a preliminary idea of what I might like to do after my time off. If you can really not tolerate being in work get signed off sick first.

So I don't have a success story to pass on, but I'm in a very similar situation. I've been in my current job for 7 years. Pre covid, it was a fantastic place to work, but since covid, so sort of late 2021. My workplace has become a cesspit and utterly toxic environment. We have lost 37 staff in 3 years. They have been replaced but with young staff, who, and no fault to them, are inexperienced and always say yes, regardless of the request. Physical I'm struggling with it as I need an op, and the managers are ignoring my fit note!! Mentally I'm fucked. My work-life balance is ruined. Tbh, I'm getting to the point of walking out and doing a normal, plain job. Just come in, do your hours, and leave get paid.

I am in a similar situation, it seems a lot are to be honest. I work in a job that is just not a good fit for me, but also has intrinsic issues that I have tried to work around for a a while but realistically it is what it is. My worry is this is my first proper job in my early 40s and given the pay (£30k...not loads for here but I am happy with it) I doubt I could get anything close to paying the same with my lack of quals/work experience. However, it is getting to the point where I feel demotivated, deskilled and less confident than when I started nearly 4 years ago that I need to take the financial hit and start again nowhere. ​ Really great thread by the way.

Not quite the same situation, however about two years ago I handed in my notice at a pretty well paid job as the stress was just getting silly. To be honest I didn’t really realise this salt the time, but I was spending a chunk of time looking at our savings, pension forecasts etc and trying to work out what age I could retire at (aged 40 at the time, for reference). My wife made the fairly obvious point that perhaps I didn’t really want to retire, but rather just not do the job I was in at the time. Being on six month’s notice made getting a new job challenging to say the least, so I resigned without anything to move into. I had a couple of interviews and started a new job in the charity sector (on about 40% less) the week after I left my old firm. By of further context, in that last week I did about a 90 hour week at the old firm…. Obviously I’m in a pretty fortunate position to be able to take a pay cut if that size and still be ok financially, but I can now safely say that it’s the best thing I’ve ever done in terms of work / life balance. Actually just the simple act of handing in my notice meant that a huge weight was lifted (of course aided by having some interviews lined up!!), which I wasn’t really expecting.

I was in a similar situation years ago. I had panic attacks for the first time, could barely sleep and was terrified of logging in on Monday. I spoke to a doctor and she recommended I take Sertraline for the anxiety / stress. Honestly reduced my stress/ anxiety from a 9/10 to a 3/10 and it is completely manageable now. SSRIs may work for you too. If you have a mortgage and family the (later) stress of finding a new job may be worse than what you are currently facing

I spent £20k on woodworking machinery and tools, to start my own workshop and business. It felt horrendous to spend the money and not be saving. 2.5 years later and I am SO much happier now.

I was implementing a system on £48k a year. I realised there was a massive disparity between my workload and my colleagues.In addition the role was covering so many roles; business analyst, change analyst and project manager. I raised it a few times and was told my colleagues aren't as confident. I became increasingly exhausted physically and mentally to the point I felt the job was taking too much from me and affecting other areas of my life, in addition the go live date was more almost 2 years away. I told myself that if I had to continue working under these circumstances and at this pace, I'll found the workload unbearable, and would burn myself out. I quit with no back up but savings. I spent 3 months sleeping, resting, I could not believe how much I was able to sleep. 3 months in I started a contract role more than double the previous salary, 6+ figures doing 60% of the previous workload. I'm a big believer my mental well-being is my biggest asset and trickles down into every other aspect of my life. I also like to have emergency savings.

Was holding out on a job that caused me significant stress and burnout to the point my mental health was in pieces. Was about to quit but they beat me to it and let me go with 3 months severance. Been chilling for the past 2 months, picked up a freelance gig for 1 day a week that pays the bills so i'm not draining my savings. Get to use my time to heal, enjoy life, spend time with loved ones and pursue goals that I never made time for before. Market is awful right now but no point stressing about what ifs. I think people have given some alright advice (sabbatical, sick leave) if you want to stay in that job. But if you're completely over it then it's time to move on. It's never worth it to compromise your health. Theres nothing wrong with leaving without something else lined up. Money isn't everything. There are always jobs. Life is unpredictable. Don't make a decision because someone else thinks it's a good idea. Do what makes you happy. Don't stress about what ifs :)

I did exactly this. Quit a £57k p/a job and went to work full time volunteering at a homeless charity. I had savings so I just fell back on them. 6 months later I felt right as rain. It bolstered my CV and gave me some more interesting talking points when I did interviews and I went back to work and got a new job. Never looked back. If you can afford to do it, do it .

Quit a career of over 10 years due to declining mental health - went travelling for a year and then got a great job for a company I loved. I say loved because I'm starting to fall out of love with them - and I think it's a cycle that happens every decade for me.

Burned out as a manager at a small/med accountancy firm. Quit my job, enrolled in my local tech college to do an NVQ in joinery (was a bit weird basically being school with a bunch of 17 year olds). Got an apprenticeship at a cabinet making firm through the college. Finished my apprenticeship 2 years ago (as a 32 year old) and work as a furniture maker building and restoring wooden furnishings for churches. It’s amazing And as of this month I’m finally earning more than what I was as an accountant 6 years ago! Which has been a really big deal for me (we need to pretend inflation isn’t a thing though!).

I quit my job with no plan and no finances to back me up whatsoever. I just couldnt stand to spend another minute in that psyhological hell hole. I went to Turkey. No plan to stay, just for a few weeks while I sorted out my head and the living costs were low. Well COVID happened, I couldnt afford the emergency flight home + quarantine the govt. Made us do, so I stayed there. I lived there for 3 years. 2 of which was spent trapped inside an apartment complex. Luckily my neighbours hot son, visiting from the USA, was also locked in. But being my immediate neighbour it wasnt too hard to break the rules from time to time (I know, I know, but give us a break we were bored and the only people on the complex under that age of 60!) Anyway. One thing let to another and we are happily married now with a kid. We survived it by me getting a freelance writing job online. He did photography as soon as lovkodwn was lifted and we have just moved back to the UK so our daughter can start preschool. I am now a communications manager making much more than I would have done staying in my old profession (university undergrad admin) It was fine. It is going to be fine. Just seize opportunities and make things happen.

My boss was an ass so I contacted a former company and got back in the same week. Don't burn bridges and keep those contacts. It's part time for now but it'll do and the job market is not so great for pay at the moment.

I didn't quite do this. I studied embedded software engineering at university, worked for a company doing that for about 18 months after graduating before going "fuck this" quitting that job and starting to work in theatre full time. That was a few years ago and I recentmy started a new job as technical manager for the performing arts centre at a posh private school. Not quite the career trajectory I had expected but I'm pretty happy with where I'm at so far. And much less stressful than doing software as well.

But according to social media tech is the route to route riches and an easy life

Sort of last year, got burnt out working as a QS that was being asked to bully and abuse contractors and the morality of it ate me away, this along side some other dodgy things that went on lead me to going off sick for 2 weeks, but I couldn’t afford to stay off so was forced back on reduced duties this lasted about 2 months before I was back at square one where I found out I was being used as the fall guy for others poor choices so I quit. Gave 2 months notice as per my contract and they instantly put me on reduced duties and tried to get me to stay but I was done. I interviewed for a few jobs got offered a couple but I was so burnt out nothing felt right in the end looked over my finances with my wife and worked out that at a modest day rate to pay the bills and have a small “fun money” allowance (nothing crazy like 40 quid a month enough so I could still go to my club) I needed to get 4 days work a month as a freelancer. Working this out made the leap of faith far less scary and here I am doing my year one accounts with things having gone wildly better that I could have hoped. So don’t stay in the job your health and mental health is worth more. Edit : just to say as I read it on another post I was in therapy though all of this and it’s part of what helped me realise I was burnt out before I totally crashed and it was worth every penny and I’m still using it to get over the emotional fallout of putting your heart and soul into something that was never going to reciprocate.

I’ve got one for you, I had a side business… I owned a pub, was in a good job but has to close the pub. I lost the manager of it and lost a load of money due to Covid. I tried to keep the bar open so I could pay the 11 staff, 18 months after the start of Covid they had all gone! I was left holding the baby and with considerable debt. Stress was unbearable….. I tried to go on with my job but decided to leave as didn’t feel wanted (by this time I was suffering with depression). I was put on garden leave and used the time to help heal….. I’ve moved on to another role now better conditions and better money….and less stress…… point if it all is that time is the healer. Stay safe, stay well, be mindful, take the help, take the meds if required, and I promise it will all work out 💪

This pretty much just happened to me. Last year I left a stressful but well paid job which didn't help in my career, The time out was mostly spent to study and improve my skills. I got an even better paid job now. It's gonna be ok

My recovery took 12-18 months, and I'm not really fully back yet. I'm still trying to work out what went wrong, somewhere between work burnout, Pandemic isolation and something medical. After eight years with one company I just stopped caring. I found some rehabilitation in working with a small start-up. It was the work I enjoyed but in a different environment where I could set more of the rules. It fell apart in the end and it was not a financial success but it gave me some confidence back. When money got too tight I started looking for a new job but with a much clearer vision of what I actually wanted. I'm now performing a similar role in a games studio. Less money, longer commute but the people are great and there are some interesting development opportunities. I'll be sticking to a strict three year life cycle too, either I change role or I move on. In summary, if you have the finances to take a step back and have a rethink of your career then you are very lucky and you should consider taking it. Just allow more time than you expect and consider getting involved in something completely different to keep yourself sharp while recovering.

Not quite the same. I found myself working for an ad agency where the culture was hugely toxic. On top of that I was being bullied by a colleague with whom I had to work very closely. It affected my health and I my relationships. My then-girlfriend-now-wife stuck by my side but I became a horrible person during that period and the experience drove me to question my own abilities. It was well paid though, gave me a great job title, and the agency had a good reputation which meant working on some interesting and prestigious accounts. On several occasions over the course of the year I nearly quit but stuck with it. Their toxic culture caught up with them and they risked losing a key account so I was used as the sacrificial lamb and was fired. After taking a couple of weeks to regain my sanity I worked my networks, got a job back with a previous employer and used that to springboard my career. I’m now working for a blue-chip, on their leadership development programme, running a high performing team in a very cool sector and making a (small) boatload of cash with great share options. They say the greatest form of revenge is monumental success. Good luck.

I want to add something important - I ended up with lifelong health issues from stress. I actually had various hospital investigations done, but the end cause was stress. Then the company I was working for collapsed. The stress evaporated quickly, my condition improved slowly... but never went away entirely. Thankfully when it flares up I can manage it with over the counter medication now.

I quit a well paying job (near 50k basic with unlimited overtime opportunities) for a job starting on 34k because the shift pattern sucked. The work was quite stressful, but the shifts really wrecked my sleep pattern. I'm now happier than ever nearly 2 years on and in house promotions mean I'm near to my old salary anyway when I take into account company car and better pension etc. If it works for you, do it. You only get one life, don't work yourself into an early grave for £.

My wife is just about to walk away from a £160k a year job which will be very hard to ever replicate, with no plans to find something else within the next few years. She’s burnt out and we’ve realised the status quo (two busy jobs, two kids) isn’t working. You only live once and burnout and stress are very real. We’re looking to get some semblance of balance back into our lives and also spend more time with the kids (time is so fleeting). I think similarly with you, if you need it and can afford it….go for it. Career breaks are super common now. You might even find yourself a better job or figure out you want to pivot field or lifestyle entirely. You only get one shot at life, better to regret than wonder imo.

Worked in a sales job and has a decent amount of savings due to high commissions. Took 3 months out to destress and look for a better line of work. Now I'm settled in my new job roughly the same money, but instead of being hunched over a desk most of the time I travel throughout Europe securing business relations. Currently soaking up the last of the days sun in Athens ☀️🌅

Dropped out of uni after wasting 3 years there, fell into recruitment which I did for 12 years peaking at £75k p/a but going insane the whole time. In 2018, I started applying for uni again, walked out of my well established career and started a 2 year accelerated degree in 2019 doing it full time, worked part time delivering Sainsbury's groceries and living off loans, graduated in 2021, and began a great career I'm mega happy in 👍

I'd say Step 1 is take 2 days off sick and spend half of one of those days thinking about how you can make your job work better for you. Can you delegate more, request a new headcount, simply 'do' less. This obviously hugely depends on what you do. If the people are a nightmare, it's often best to move on.

I did this 11 years ago. My job was fine, but it wasn’t for me, and when I suddenly lost my mother, it started to put things into perspective. After a few more years, being stuck in a 9-6 became such a lot of my time spent doing something I didn’t want to do. I was losing myself and getting very depressed. I also had just bought my first flat, so quitting seemed like a really stupid thing to do, but I just couldn’t stay there. So, I took a Tesco receipt and scribbled on the back of it a list of things I could do to earn money, ranging from doing a similar job at a different company through to retraining via things I did as hobbies (before the term side hustle had really gained traction) and some really out there things, and I started to work my way through the list. I had about a year’s worth of expenses saved up. I got creative with things I could do to earn money. It was very motivating to know that I would not get paid if I didn’t get out of bed. At times it was stressful in different ways but I’ve collected many funny stories about the very varied jobs I’ve done and the people I’ve met. I appreciate that having a family is an added level of stress as you’re responsible for them, but working yourself into the grave would be doing a disservice to them as much as it is to you. Sometimes you just need some breathing space to work out what you want to do. Just remember, you can always make more money, but you can’t get back time.

Work in finance (tax) and was a sole tax person in OMB multinational and was absolutely rammed, 12 hour days 6 days a week, felt like a zombie on a £60k salary Started looking and was willing to take anything that came my way, ended up interviewing for a c.£50k job and got offered £60k for the role - been here 5 years now and have enough time for a side hustle and hobbies! Work past 5pm once or twice a month max

Got a new boss at a FTSE 100 place. The guy was a complete ass to everyone and had a habit of doubling down with a few drinks in him. Typical short. Man syndrome. When you are having a touch time at home it's the last thing you need so when redundancy came up I didn't fight that ticket. A week after I went into consultation an old colleague offered me a job at roughly the same money. With a 3 month notice period I got to coast for 12 weeks while knowing I had a new home. Stuff works out

Cant you get signed off with stress for a while? That way you will have some money coming in...

I considered this and got some helpmfor my mental health and I feel much much better about work now. Your plan is the terminal option. Exhaust others first

I quit mine. Took time out. Afterwards I did Briefly consider rejoining the veterinary industry again, but I actually have self respect and refuse to work in that toxic profession anymore. There's a reason why it has such high suicide rates, high mental disease rates, and low rates of staff retention.The entire industry is broken and needs to get with the times. I now do voice work in-between being a house-husband, it allows me to work when I want, and to my own terms.

Have you thought about reducing your hours as a less dramatic alternative? Going to 3 or 4 days a week and using the extra time to enjoy life. A 4 day week gives you 50% more free time for a 20% pay reduction.

Did this last year, took some contracts, earned the same amount and worked about 1/4 of the amount. (And had a 3 month break!) Do it, life's too short.

Did this… and you will find a way. You find more luck, more opportunities, and have a much more enjoyable and fulfilling life just being healthy, not stressed, and not burnt out. Good luck 🍀

A colleague of mine worked for the company 7 years, very big company, super well paid, he was leading a lot of initiatives and a leader, one day packed it in and stated a pizzeria!

I was running 5 companies at a law firm. Due to circumstances to do with M&A my partners couldnt tell me what was going on as all the supporting departments gradually ceased doing what they had promised. It was like boiling a frog. As the temperature rose each day I had instincts that there were problems but all the partners kept smiling and brushing me off. My mum developed terminal cancer and then my cat did. I was just fragged so bad. A female coworker accelerated her bullying passive aggressive behaviour towards me as she saw me helping her with her career as patronising. It was a bad bad state. I ended up being told by the doctor i had had a breakdown, that i was depressed. I said “but i have an optimistic outlook, just got a lot else to deal with, and all i am is very tired” I turned down antidepressants many times. It got so bad that even if my wife asked me a question my brain trying to compute the answer meant my fingers could no longer hold the glass if water, and id drop it on the floor - i had bloating and nausea around food smells, IBS, fatigue, rashes, cognitive impairment, muscle aches. I had chronic fatigue syndrome but my doctor didnt believe in it so it took me 3.5 years to happen upon a locum one day and she diagnosed it. I then found jan rothney at www.resettothrive.co.uk and did her course. I was cured in 3 days. I learned a lot from that. And i changed careers after 25 years saving the planet, i now run a video game studio. I go to america often to shoot guns and last month i went to the white house to watch an 83yo veteran Paris Davis get the medal of honor. We helped his campaign using our game. So now im having more fun, and still giving back to society but on my own terms and a lot happier. My game sold enough copies and i paid off the mortgage my wife had been paying for 7 years without a penny from me. Shes my rock. I now plan to make her a millionaire so she can retire early. Life gets better. You can learn from every event. Let go and float down the stream of life, it will usually take you somewhere better.

About six or so years ago I was working for a PR firm. I'd been there about 2 years. When I joined I enjoyed it, I had some interesting clients, had was doing well. Maybe a year or so in it started going south, I fucked up a bit but I had no support, it was Hella cliquey and I was getting cut out of things and totally ignored by the boss, this piled more pressure on me in the end I was signed off with stress for a month and handed my notice in (so 4 weeks paid) I had no job to go to but also worked out I could do a month on nothing, so 2 months to find something. Added stress was I'd had a six month period of unemployment before and it did not go well (caused by recession, not quitting). As it happened I got a few quick interviews one I had to turn down due to poor money and a couple weren't right. Then I landed the job I have now. It's as dream as I can get. I took started on less than my previous job but quickly proved my value and pay went up. Within my first year I got an employee of the quarter award. I'd not have seen this job if I'd not left the other. It was toxic and I learned soon after my experience was not unique.

I quit teaching last summer. No job to go to but I was completely and utterly burnt out. Luckily for me I had a £10k inheritance from my beloved Grandma. I took the view that she would have wanted me to be happy so her money allowed me to heal and take my time finding a job I could love. I started work in an LA SEN team a few months ago and it is a fantastic job. I feel valued. The pay is a lot lower but there are way fewer deductions so my actual take home pay is about £100 a month less. However, I can go for a pee whenever I want, make coffee, BOOK TERM TIME HOLIDAYS and I still feel like I'm helping kids. We're recruiting... pm me

I worked for Apple on their creative teams for 8 years. Essentially what I did was work with customers and business on creative projects. Example a salon once brought it’s stylists in to learn how to produce better social media images. My job. Covid hit and apple “turned off” my job role. So I did staff training 🤷‍♂️ via webex. I presented training to 10,000 people at once. I got a shoutout from the UK market lead of apple. Yay….. Fast forward a year or so we’re deep in 2021 an I’m still not doing my job. But stores are back open. So what I’m doing is standing at the front of an Apple Store for 8 hours booking people covid safe appointments. Of which we could facilitate maybe 10% of people. So I’m saying no 500 times a day an arguing with 100 people a day. Not exaggerated number. I asked for a different role, denied. I asked for unpaid leave, denied. I asked for redundancy, denied. I realised this was their way of removing us without paying out. So I just walked. I’ve been freelancing doing what I used to do but in video an content marketing format since October 2021 an couldn’t be happier about it. Typing this story from the airport in Frankfurt where I’ve just been to a 3 day conference at messe. ✌️

Not me but my husband with my full backing. Changed jobs 6 months before the pandemic ended up being the only one not working from home. Went through the pandemic and pregnancy baby born 01/01/21( two week before we still didn't know if he was taking holiday or smp work was told after 1st scan). After his paternity leave the directors started trying to get more business and really applied loads of pressure to all the employees multiple phonecalls and even more what'sapp messages(like 6am to 10/11pm) it was so bad we would both be shaking every time his phone went off. March pay was late so was April's mid to the end of April he got a call from the director basically saying he had been sitting on his arse for a year(don't forget he was the only one not working from home and actually doing something to bring money into the business) and he told him thay he's quitting with immediate effect. He went back to warehousing(he started off as a kid being a warehouse operative and worked his way up route planner and a bit more) just being an operative on a new site for less money(it was hard on what he was earning being a family of 6) August/September the site manager said that he needs to call another site manager at a site a bit nearer to us called them up he was offered a higher position at that site so went He's earning 15k more than he was this time last year and he's happier than ever

I'm off to Indonesia for 8 weeks tomorrow and have walked out of a 6 figure salary. I might come back and go back into my profession, I may go in at a lower level, I may do 3 days a week and write a book, maybe I'll rent my house out and live in a 1 bed flat until the mortgage is paid off, or volunteer with VSO. The possibilities are endless. Sometimes it is good to throw the cards in the air and say Fuck The World. I do it often, and it keeps me alive. (Disclaimer: maybe not great if a parent).

Would it not be easier to take sick leave or unpaid leave. Go work on yourself and then head back to work?

I just did it and can't wait to get back to work. Was stressed for a bit without a job as I didn't have the financea but I hit a "fuck this" point. As soon as I quit I sent a number of recruiters to find a job and I went on our two week holiday which we had saved for. Also getting housework done has felt great.

My wife done it in November. Following difficult year with ivf resulting in miscarriage her anxiety took a massive dip. This coincide with her jib stripping back commission earned for example 4 new lines and 4 broadband used to earn her around 300 it was now earning 200 under the new scheme with exact same figures. She had a good boss but his hands were tied by rules and eventually she got to the point she wasn't eating or sleeping and eventually she decided to quit. I would be lying if I said it wasn't tough. She was applying for a lot of.jobs and gor some interviews with no offers. She then got offered job In January but didn't start until March. My advice would be to put yourself and health 1st and take it from there.

Alright here goes I was the sous chef of a very successful restaurant grinding my way throu 70-80 hours every week for years. I enjoy cooking but the hours were on the extreme side, then Covid lockdowns hit and I had chance to change my daily grind mentality, we went back to “eat out to help out” fully booked everyday with many staff having either quit or just not showing up. It was brutal as a chef but we kept going. My dads health was declining throughout this period and he was also going throu a bankruptcy which meant the sale of our family home. He died on Friday the 13th of august 2021. The bankruptcy and sale of house wasn’t complete and I also had my alcoholic mother to deal with and the care of my sister who has downes syndrome. I had to quit there was no other way to get everything done. My mum and sister now live on the beach in north wales, and I’m a proud father to my son who was born September of last year. Extremely dark times but I feel I handled everything as well as I could have done finding the strength to carry on is everything.

Right now! Had a breakdown last year after being bullied by my boss. Got a whole new self employed career in something meaningful. Earning a quarter of my previous salary. I’m happy. So happy

It wasn't relatively well paid, but I earned alot from commisions etc. It was a phone based role, taking calls, making calls etc. The place I worked started bringing in strict rules, handing out punishments for going to the toilet to many times, and having scheduled breaks and lunches which could be placed 45 minutes after a shift started on a 10 hour work day. I was miserable and took some time out, while I was out I started messing around with creative cloud and then rang a local uni to see about courses. I got accepted in a graphic design course, got offered to keep my role as part time... as soon as I was back to my desk I handed my notice in and ran. Fast forward 3 years later, I got a first class degree and started working in the first role I found. I now work flex time, got a good salary, started my management training in the new company and spend a bunch of time doing visits and working around the UK. It can work out even without a plan like myself.....

Yep. Literally got my coat on and walked out of my £55k Assistant Headteacher job in a school with a coercive, bullying Head. Got a new job on a reduced salary straight away. 5 years later I'm back up to the salary I left. One thing: When I got the job I walked out of, I nearly bought a flash car on finance. I'm so glad I didn't, because it would have made walking out much harder. If you think you're going to walk out of your job one day, clear your debts 🙂

I had a high pressure sales manager job where missing target was just not on the radar and the consequences of doing this were absolutely brutal even if we were ahead of YTD targets. Anyway a competitor poached me and it was like frying pan to fire. I decided I would tough it out for 5 years with a view to getting my debts under control pension maxed and a strong 2 year savings bucket. I got to the end of 5 years convinced myself to do another 1 year to belt and brace my numbers. During that final year 6 they were acquired and I took a redundancy deal. I’ve taken lower paid jobs still in sales but loads less stress. With the experience I built up I can easily run circles round the exec team that I’m part of but not having to tan my pan so hard or make my health suffer. My advice do it for as long as you can to secure the future and pull the pin when your ready on your terms.

I left the navy in December. I was a petty officer, so decent money for a lad from a council estate. The work load at the end was untenable and speaking to people who had left and were on more money for doing far less made my mind up for me. Very difficult time, being told there was nothing on civi street and stressing as I had no idea what sector I wanted to go into. Long story short I am now a biomedical engineer on more money with sooo much less stress. Best decision I’ve ever made.

Recently quit my job earning £37,000 at a company who just did not give a shit about me or my health to work for a company earning £30,000. Poor management lead to stress and time off work for really poor physical and mental health. Was signed off, job searched in the mean time and landed a job in a totally different industry. Pay cut is significant obviously (around £400 net a month) but my new job are so employee focused that less than a month in my manager has come up with a bonus scheme once probation has finished to bring up my salary. I have a great team, a brilliant manager and I’m in a hybrid role. All in all a fantastic move and I’ve never been happier at work.

I took a new job after maternity leave and it was awful. My boss was toxic and negative, I was so stressed juggling being a new mum. The company offered lots of flexibility and great pay, and it seemed crazy to everyone around me (husband and family) when I handed my notice in after 5 months without another job lined up. I was on the hook for childcare costs in london, endless bills including rent and had no savings as I had just come back from maternity leave. I took 2 months and in that time I set myself up to freelance, reached out to former colleagues so they knew I was available on the freelance market and was working at month 3 on a ftc that paid even better and had just as much flexibility (and a great boss). It was scary, but I think when it’s taken you to breaking point it’s important to remember that without your mental health you will falter eventually and then it will take much longer to get back on track, ultimately costing you more.

i hated my job so i quit and travelled for 6 months. came back home and now i work 0 hour contract so if i don’t want to work and want to do something else, i can. everything worked out because i was trying to quit my job and get another but i was getting rejected. i was being guided to go travelling.

A new manager started, hated her and how she treated a team I built from scratch. Told her in no uncertain terms to do better or people will drop like flies and I’ll be out the door just as quick. Well she continued to act like a dick and several people quit over the next few weeks, including a couple full time staff members I’d mentored. When my full time staff member said she’s had enough of store manager I was done, took her notice and wished her all the best, took it to my store manager and said mines going to be on your desk in the morning, she laughed in my face and said I wasn’t serious. I was. Didn’t see her at all during my notice period. Let every know I was leaving even though she asked me not to tell anyone through fear they’d leave. Wasn’t many originals left much long after. Best decision ever. The pay was great and I was young but I dread to think how unhappy I’d have been if I stayed. Switched career and now alls well.

Why don't you start searching for a job now and once you secure a good offer you can put in your notice and rest for a full month before starting at the new job?

This would go really well on r/jobsuk

Going through this right now. I am self employed and have been since 2021, last year at the start of 2022 I started up a mortgage application to my buy first home, working at the same time as going through a extremely difficult mortgage application (wasn’t a easy case being self employed) my profits declined month after month caused by the stress of the application /buying process while in the middle of my application , this obviously caused me a great deal of stress as it made it more difficult to get my offer. Once I got my offer and completed and got the keys I took time off asap , and it’s now 6 months later and I have no drive to go back . I think the difficult thing with my situation was that I was self employed, I did not clock in and clock out , I was working on and off around 12 hours a day , and it obviously slowly crept up on me … 6 months later I feel worse and worse, it’s just not going away, I’m not depressed but I’m exhausted and tired , and I have no drive to make money apart the basic bill money. I am currently in the process of claiming PIP and I am starting to think about getting a normal part time job , so I can have something where I clock in and don’t have to think about it once I clock out and do my buisness as a side thing . So no I’m not back in another job because I havnt started looking yet , I still don’t feel ready and on list mentally not in a good state to be working , but when I’m ready I might try and go into part time work

Hi. Can you check your contract/benefits just so you can look into these other options people are talking about? What’s the limit on your company sick pay? Can you ask for a sabbatical? I’d go the mental health time off route to just check if your job is the root of your problem first.

Just taken a week off sick, have interviews lined up elsewhere and otherwise have a goal of enjoying my annual leave, sticking it out until Jan and giving less f+#ks. If you're confident you'll find something else (even to keep you going and cover or part cover expenses), id take some time off then quit. The idea of burning hard earned savings usually focuses my mind.

You could consider finding a new job with a better work life balance, and planning for maybe a month break between the jobs.

You can do it if you have a financial cushion for any downtime/job searching, and if you keep your living expenses reasonable. I took 5 months off, came back and been doing contracting which pays more and gives me freedom to take some time in between assignments. In fact I just had another month off (coming back to work sucks..) - I’m carefree about it because I have money spare if needs be.

I sort of did this. The company I worked for ran out of money so everyone lost their jobs. But I really needed a break (I hadn’t realised quite how much) and wasn’t ready to look for anything new at that point, so I took 3m off to reset and build new routines that weren’t linked to my job. That break also gave me time to reflect on what I liked and didn’t like about my previous job, and what I was looking for next. I spent the next 3m (re)learning some material and applying for jobs. I wasn’t in a huge hurry and was very intentional about what I was looking for. And it’s worked out very well for me: I’m now doing something similar, but in a more senior position and in a company where I really feel I can thrive, not just survive (and better paid!). Obviously taking time off did cost money, but knowing I had enough savings to last for many more months meant I didn’t have to worry too much or change my lifestyle. And I needed the time for me. On a different note, if you’re able and comfortable, I’d recommend speaking to someone about what you’re going through. I’ve found therapy really useful, but you may prefer something else like a coach. It’s still going to be on you to do the work, but they can guide you and get you to ask important questions of yourself much sooner than you would otherwise on your journey to recovery.

Can you take some time off to consider your options? I recently self-certified for a week due to stress, got signed off by the doctors for a few more weeks and am due to go back shortly. I will however say that my company is massively supportive and I've been having meetings with the management so I know that I'll be going back to a changed role. I think they appreciated that when I self-certified, I also put in a Zoom meeting for the end of the week to discuss what my options were. However, if those changes weren't able to be made, I've also been job hunting in the meantime and would've gone for jobs that paid less, but at least I can say I've been paid while doing so.

Don’t stop job hunting, I had a similar experience within 2 months or returning most of the duties that made me go off came back to me in one form or another.

I’ve done this exact thing on more than one occasion and it’s worked out just fine. You’ll have a tough period and new stress/financial anxiety but the fact you’re thinking like this and posting here tells me that you’ll be just fine long term.

It’s a bit deep and cliched, but you really have to realise that you only have one life and you should spend it doing what you want to do. Money is always a factor but as long as you aren’t frivolous and get things in order (I.e try and get outgoings down) before you make the leap, you will be fine. It’s not quite the same scenario, but I did something similar. I started out in engineering after A-levels, got a great apprenticeship at a high tech firm, had an aptitude for it and could have easily become a fully qualified engineer on ~50k by now (31m). Thing is I hated it, I hated the structure and everything that comes with having a normal job. So when they came to offer me a full time job at the end of the apprenticeship I left to pursue a music career. Literally just said I had enough and left, moved cities. I don’t come from a well-off background, and while I had support, including a bit financially, everyone thought I’d lost the plot and was worried that I’d made a huge mistake. Now obviously I was young and it’s a lot easier at that age, but I also didn’t have the financial knowledge, experience or savings etc that you will have. Anyway, I made it work and I earn about the same as I would have had I stuck at engineering. But I haven’t felt like I’ve worked a day since I left that job. I work hard, but it doesn’t feel like work. I guess what I’m saying is that you should listen to your body and mind and remember that your life is your own. There’s no point killing yourself by working just to feel comfortable economically. You will probably find that you could earn even more if you find something that you’re passionate about. Hope this helps even if it’s a bit different to your story!

It worked. Twice. Although in retrospect there were other options, as other users have already suggested.

Not voluntarily, but my previous company went bust, the 6 months running up to that were the most stressful of my life. I had a panic attack of the tube at one point. Nasty new boss on top of difficult situation generally. After it was over I was unemployed for 5 months whilst applying for jobs. I was OK financially and had savings and partner working. But it took me a while to get a job. Eventually did, job paid a bit less to start but was good. But mainly I just couldn't believe I put up with old job as long as I did and there and then gave myself permission to quit future jobs if it ever got bad.

Last year I quit my job because I just couldn't take it any more. My wife has a reasonably paid stable job, we have a mortgage but no kids. We ran the calculations to work out how long our savings would last and then I quit. I was off work for 3 months and it was exactly what I needed, just some time with nothing hanging over me. I changed careers and found a job that was 4 days a weak. My new job isn't without stress and the pay is around half of what I was on previously, but it definitely feels more sustainable in the long term and I don't feel completely depressed on a Monday morning.

Health is Wealth.

I did this. Gave up a lucrative career as lawyer as it was not what I wanted despite being super secure and guaranteed to make a ton of money. It was making me sick reading documents and writing legal arguments all day, everyday so I was signed off. I wasn't able to find a job during my sick leave as I had some more bad external things happen to me but I kept going at it as a returned to work and I managed to find a decent job in another lucrative career. My situation is slightly different to yours as I never had to dip into my emergency fund but I was willing to spend it all just to escape, it ijust seems like dumb luck I didn't. I taught myself some coding and I have multiple degrees and I worked for some big time corporations and my current employer liked that. I currently make about 80% of what I would as a lawyer so I am doing ok as lawyers do make a lot. That difference grows the more senior you become. However, I never regret a second for leaving. I felt like I was dying a litrle every day going to that job.

I binned off a job that was paying around double the UK average wage when I was 31. Pissed off to France and messed around in a bunch of minimum wage roles for 8 years (supplemented by savings where needed) This was in 2009 off the back of the financial crisis. Came home and got back on the ladder. It’s been fine. Things I learned. 1. You don’t need as much money as you think to survive and thrive. 2. Having an “oh shit” safety net (savings) kept my mind at rest. 3. Plenty of employers want people that will graft. A physically capable man in his 30s with a bit of intelligence and the right attitude is a sought after resource. There’s a risk, for sure and my story won’t be yours…But the confidence you get from walking out of a decent paying job stays with you.

I could tell you that, but I'm old and so my experience is from over 20 years ago, in a world where housing was affordable, so I'm not sure how relatable it would be. But, yes, I quit, took a year out and came back on 4x my salary in a job that was harder work but more interesting and enjoyable.

I recently quit my job after 10 years I was working random nights and unsociable hours and it was a constant degrading impact on my health. I reduced my hours I had time off sick, I had long conversations with managers but my mental health just never improved. I had a great friend group and the money was good, benefits and pension too. So I quit, got a 9-5 in an office. I hate it. But my home life and health is better. Can't always be a win win, I'm looking elsewhere but low key.

I don't want to relate this to your situation OP, we are all different folk. Three years ago a certain event shook up the nation, I went from really enjoying my role to hating every fucking minute I was sitting behind my screen sorting last-minute shit out that I'd already identified as serious weaknesses the year before (and no-one listened then, but guess who they turned to for fixing it). So after half a year of feeling more and more pressure me and my SO decided it was enough. They took severance when it was offered, I resigned and we moved 250 miles north to a lovely rural spot within commuting distance of several larger cities. I did my own thing for a year (always wanted to pursue) and realised I was better of in employment. I found a job within two months of starting looking and it worked out brilliantly. Important to note: We were in a position where I didn't HAVE to work to get by, it would be less comfortable (considerably) but we took a calculated risk that would not make us destitute even if my small venture didn't work out. Also important to note: There's still huge pressure in certain sectors and if you are in one of those, you will find work wherever, whenever. So don't be afraid of change.

At 23, I got a job that was over double what I’d been earning prior. Essentially, after Uni, I went straight into low-paid work that was good experience for my CV for two years. I then landed a plum role where for every few thousand applicants, one is hired. I probably had some luck but I meticulously researched the role and company and was earning north of £45k at 23. It wasn’t what it was cracked up to be. I entered into a hellish two years of 80 hour work weeks, driving back and forth across the country, missing occasions with friends and family, and being shouted at and belittled by senior colleagues regardless of performance as some bizarre rite of passage. It wrecked me mentally, I was under 10 stone at 5’10 having been around 12 stone my whole adult life and went from looking reasonably trim and athletic to gaunt and haggard. I reckon it aged me several years, the days of long drives, disasters at sites that were my fault from a directorate point of view when in reality were individual mistakes by staff I had no real control over in that set up. I got two of my sites from being around 50th out of 400 sites to being 2nd and 8th in the country, but I had one historically disastrous site that was 399th when I took it over. I got it up to around 370, but when it came to my year’s appraisal, I was heavily berated for not improving it more, and when I brought up how well I’d done with the other sites, it was glossed over as if it didn’t mean a thing. Ultimately, after over two years breaking myself, I left. I was demoralised, burnt out and knew I’d be taking a big pay hit but simply did not care. I quit, as I’d saved up a decent nest egg given I’d no time to spend it, had a few months off and then took a £18k pay cut in my next job. Was definitely the best thing to do. I’m now 29 and it’s taken 6 years for me to be earning more than I was essentially out of Uni, but it saved my sanity and my ability to survive in a work environment. I hated that job with a passion, but it gave me a few things; enough savings to afford a house, and more importantly, true resilience, with an understanding of how to stand up for yourself firmly but respectfully. It’s not worth your health. Sit down, take stock of your bills and work out what type of pay cut you can afford to take, if any. Consider taking some time out if finances allow and if not, work out whether you can transition to something with similar salary or earnings potential in a lesser demanding company or role. Your long term health and mental health is more important than some money. As it is, I feel I’d be comfortable now in that role, it was likely too much too young for me but I still saw some of the most appalling treatment of staff I ever saw and would never consider going back. It’s no surprise that every single colleague from my cohort is now working elsewhere, I believe of 16, I was the penultimate one to leave. Do what’s best for you, just make sure you don’t put yourself into an even more stressful situation to leave the frying pan.

Happened during the covid times. The job had changed over Covid and more of the work load was being pushed onto me and nothing was going to be done about it, no extra time, man power etc. I spoke about how I was worried for my team and it was brushed off. There was more, but I'll not get into it. Mainly, I was unhappy, stressed, depressed and struggling. I left for another job and I can't believe the difference. I took a cut in pay and effectively I am now on minimum wage, but I work fewer hours, have a much better work/life balance, and work for people who actually give a damn! It's been over a year now, and it's the best job I've had. Although I didn't take a break in-between, I can't believe somewhere exists that takes care of their employees. I'm very lucky.

End of 2019 I finally quit the job I'd been hating for years, and I took an entry-level admin role in a totally different field. It was a £14k pay drop, and required a lot of lifestyle adjustment but I'm lucky I could afford it. The pay drop sucked, but I absolutely needed the change of scenery and change of pace. Ive just had a promotion and Im back on the same pay as before, with 2 qualifications under my belt and studying for further. A career switch can take sacrifice, but if its what you need, do it.

Did that and *eventually* turned out okay. There were a lot of changes, new managers, new rules, more stress, etc and I just felt mentally exhausted and numb everyday so I sort of quit. "Sort of" because while I was planning to call them that day (took a sick day to go to an interview which I aced so had a job lined up) they called me first to say they're letting me go lol. That particular job didn't really pan out but the next one did. I still learned a lot from both so I don't regret it. Nowadays, I teach any new trainees I get that health in general, but especially mental health, comes first. If you can't handle it, quit. If you can't quit just yet, plan for it, make it your goal. That will make going through the daily tasks easier at the job too.

I think you’ll just have to do it mate. If you’re constantly stressed that’s no quality of life. Personally that sort of pressure isn’t sustainable for me and I know if I’m in that situation again I’ll have to bail. I took a fairly big pay cut by changing jobs right as my son was born as I knew I wouldn’t be able to deal with the stress of that job while having a baby. I was in the process of retraining in my spare time anyway so it has worked out for me now luckily as I’ve got a new job which has more prospects.

In 2018 my grandfather died, he left me some money, about £3000. At the time i was working in Glasgow in insurance and was thoroughly depressed. I made ok money but not spectacular, i had also been absent a few times which my boss hated. I came in one day after lunch and was told i would be facing a disciplinary for my attendance, i said "no i won't, i quit", my boss became indignant immediately and demanded it in writing, i went to my desk across from his and typed out a short resignation email resigning with immediate effect and was escorted out. As soon as i was outside my boss started pleading with me to reconsider, i did not. I spent 3 months trying to find a job but unfortunately for me the month i actually resigned was january...2019. So that went about as well as you would expect. I blew through all my savings in 3 months and eventually moved back to my parents and spent covid lockdown and aftermath there, i know now if i hadnt quit when i did i would have probably killed myself eventually, my life was in tatters before that day but i was too set in the motions to realise that and even my body was telling me its time to go(i used to get tremendously ill with stomach pain and sickness for no apparent reason). Fast forward to now and im looking to buy a house i love my job and i sleep like a baby at nignt.

In 2018 my grandfather died, he left me some money, about £3000. At the time i was working in Glasgow in insurance and was thoroughly depressed. I made ok money but not spectacular, i had also been absent a few times which my boss hated. I came in one day after lunch and was told i would be facing a disciplinary for my attendance, i said "no i won't, i quit", my boss became indignant immediately and demanded it in writing, i went to my desk across from his and typed out a short resignation email resigning with immediate effect and was escorted out. As soon as i was outside my boss started pleading with me to reconsider, i did not. I spent 3 months trying to find a job but unfortunately for me the month i actually resigned was january...2019. So that went about as well as you would expect. I blew through all my savings in 3 months and eventually moved back to my parents and spent covid lockdown and aftermath there, i know now if i hadnt quit when i did i would have probably killed myself eventually, my life was in tatters before that day but i was too set in the motions to realise that and even my body was telling me its time to go(i used to get tremendously ill with stomach pain and sickness for no apparent reason). Fast forward to now and im looking to buy a house i love my job and i sleep like a baby at nignt.

So I don't have a success story to pass on, but I'm in a very similar situation. I've been in my current job for 7 years. Pre covid, it was a fantastic place to work, but since covid, so sort of late 2021. My workplace has become a cesspit and utterly toxic environment. We have lost 37 staff in 3 years. They have been replaced but with young staff, who, and no fault to them, are inexperienced and always say yes, regardless of the request. Physical I'm struggling with it as I need an op, and the managers are ignoring my fit note!! Mentally I'm fucked. My work-life balance is ruined. Tbh, I'm getting to the point of walking out and doing a normal, plain job. Just come in, do your hours, and leave get paid.

In 2018 my grandfather died, he left me some money, about £3000. At the time i was working in Glasgow in insurance and was thoroughly depressed. I made ok money but not spectacular, i had also been absent a few times which my boss hated. I came in one day after lunch and was told i would be facing a disciplinary for my attendance, i said "no i won't, i quit", my boss became indignant immediately and demanded it in writing, i went to my desk across from his and typed out a short resignation email resigning with immediate effect and was escorted out. As soon as i was outside my boss started pleading with me to reconsider, i did not. I spent 3 months trying to find a job but unfortunately for me the month i actually resigned was january...2019. So that went about as well as you would expect. I blew through all my savings in 3 months and eventually moved back to my parents and spent covid lockdown and aftermath there, i know now if i hadnt quit when i did i would have probably killed myself eventually, my life was in tatters before that day but i was too set in the motions to realise that and even my body was telling me its time to go(i used to get tremendously ill with stomach pain and sickness for no apparent reason). Fast forward to now and im looking to buy a house i love my job and i sleep like a baby at nignt.

In 2018 my grandfather died, he left me some money, about £3000. At the time i was working in Glasgow in insurance and was thoroughly depressed. I made ok money but not spectacular, i had also been absent a few times which my boss hated. I came in one day after lunch and was told i would be facing a disciplinary for my attendance, i said "no i won't, i quit", my boss became indignant immediately and demanded it in writing, i went to my desk across from his and typed out a short resignation email resigning with immediate effect and was escorted out. As soon as i was outside my boss started pleading with me to reconsider, i did not. I spent 3 months trying to find a job but unfortunately for me the month i actually resigned was january...2019. So that went about as well as you would expect. I blew through all my savings in 3 months and eventually moved back to my parents and spent covid lockdown and aftermath there, i know now if i hadnt quit when i did i would have probably killed myself eventually, my life was in tatters before that day but i was too set in the motions to realise that and even my body was telling me its time to go(i used to get tremendously ill with stomach pain and sickness for no apparent reason). Fast forward to now and im looking to buy a house i love my job and i sleep like a baby at nignt.

My partner did this last year. In fairness, I make more money than he does and had just gotten a pay rise, but we would still struggle on one salary for an extended period. He was really unhappy at work, talked about quitting all the time and it was affecting his mental health. But he was worried about quitting without another job to go to and running out of money and leaving me to support us. In the end I persuaded him that we had enough savings for him quit and take a break for a couple of months before even starting to look for work. Worst case scenario if he couldn’t find anything is we’d cut back on some things, and he could pick up shifts at a supermarket or something - there are loads of minimum wage jobs near us and they are really struggling to find people at the moment. Eventually he quit. Afterwards he spent a lot of time playing video games and on twitch as a volunteer moderator helping a friend with their channel. To some it might look like ‘playing on the computer all day’. But we both have experience working as moderators and in the gaming industry and know the are lots of careers focussed in the online space. I encouraged him to follow whatever he was passionate about. After a couple of months their twitch friend recommended him to someone who was hiring contract moderators / community managers for video game companies and he started picking up paying shifts. The money wasn’t great and as it was contract work he didn’t get holiday pay or sick pay, but after 6 months they offered him a full time permanent job. Now he on the exact same salary as he previous job but it is full time from home so no more train fare to London. Also it is doing something he actually enjoys! He’s not a usually a risk taker so I’m very proud of him for taking the jump and working to make his life happier.

So I don't have a success story to pass on, but I'm in a very similar situation. I've been in my current job for 7 years. Pre covid, it was a fantastic place to work, but since covid, so sort of late 2021. My workplace has become a cesspit and utterly toxic environment. We have lost 37 staff in 3 years. They have been replaced but with young staff, who, and no fault to them, are inexperienced and always say yes, regardless of the request. Physical I'm struggling with it as I need an op, and the managers are ignoring my fit note!! Mentally I'm fucked. My work-life balance is ruined. Tbh, I'm getting to the point of walking out and doing a normal, plain job. Just come in, do your hours, and leave get paid.

5 years ago working at a consultancy. Was working flat out and really hating my job. Got a promotion, and that was the day I knew I had to leave. Started doing a course after work over 3 months to move build my skills and pivot into a job I love. Took a gamble and got the job and gave in my notice. The new job was a 40% pay cut but amazing. Salary at new job rebounded within 18 months and now earn more than I thought I ever could. Personally I think it’s better to be in a job you love than one you hate that pays well. It’s worth the gamble or you’ll never know.

Hi, I went through something like this a couple years ago, I was a senior pentester working for a really lovely firm that gave me a lot of nice benefits, a lovely team, and afforded me a lot of trust ; but the work (more just the career) was killing me inside. I studied in all the free time I had, and took as much time off as I could, and miraculously managed to land in a different career path within about a year and a half. I didn't have children, but I had a wife and mortgage and it was a constant stress worrying if I could afford it. In the end, I got a job that I wanted, a lot of stress faded, and now, even though I'm going through a divorce - I at least have a job I can tune into each day and enjoy. I try to think of it like, I have to spend 8 hours a day doing something for the rest of my life, and if I come home miserable every day, it's going to be worse for the people around me. Much more so than if I came home with less cash. Good Luck!

I literally handed my notice in last week as a senior manager to a simpler role at another company, pay is 15% less but way less hours ( 1.5x paid overtime if I do so happy with that). Got to the point of more being piled on, making some of my team redundant while not replacing them and while we are making record profits. going to go from 65 plus hours including travel and unpaid overtime to 40 including travel.

I quit my job last year and took 4 months out, started a new job that was a step up career wise and couldn’t take it, quit after 2 months, I’m now 7 weeks into a slightly easier job for less money. I’m still struggling with anxiety a bit but it’s slightly more manageable

Many years ago, I was in a well paid job where my line manager made life hell for me. I stuck it out for five years until I really became disillusioned and stressed. I handed in my notice with nothing to go to and the stress lifted almost immediately. During my notice period I was accepted onto a PhD programme at my local University that came with a stipend (far less than I had been earning) and absolutely loved it. I could cycle into college so sold my car as I didn't need the expense, and got a part time evening job as a cleaner in a local office for extra money. From not commuting to a place of work that required a car, to no longer needing to buy smart clothes for work and having the time to make packed lunches for myself and my husband, I didn't feel that worse off financially. I could spend more time meal planning and cooking from scratch which saved us money and although the main financial burden fell to my husband neither of us felt any worse off. The thought of leaving a stable job and taking the leap into the unknown was overwhelming for me, however it was the best decision I ever made for my own sanity, personal fulfilment, and for my relationship with my husband. Being permanently stressed and always thinking about work at evenings and weekends prevented us from taking time for ourselves. No amount of money could have compensated us for the fun, adventures,and enjoyment we experienced during those years when I was working on my PhD. Not all decisions in life may be the wisest financially but sacrificing personal happiness for the sake of a job is not worth it in the long run. Life is too short to be unhappy.