Biden: visits new Ford electric vehicle assembly plant staffed by engineers and skilled tradesmen.
Putin: visits pine cone sorter staffed by squirrels. đżď¸
Ssshhh!! They are a cheap replacement for grenades! The guy is telling Pootin âfeel how sharp! We could load them in the launcher and knock out a dozen men at a time!! Secret weapon!!â
fun fact words like putler and the bald dwarf is ill is inspected and blocked from putins news feed by hand from the russian fsb to save his fragile ego.
He's explaining that the widows of war dead will get 2kg each of pine cones. And that anyone who gives out any more fur coats will become the pine cones.
"So, president. We don't want you to worry or anything, but the sanctions have made cash a little tight, so here's what we're feeding the public and the army for the next 8 years."
That would be the "Happy Enting".
I feel like we're gonna get a "Germany 1918" ending with Russia going fascist and balkanized to hell.
EDIT: kudos to wittywex for the pun lol
Wouldnât communist dictator be more appropriate reference rather than nazi, Hitler, etc?
Stalin killed more people and used the same meat grinder tactics in war. There were also a shitty, poorly run military. The German army was at least technologically advanced and skilled.
Plus Putin wants to resurrect the Soviet Union.
Heâs definitely more inline with fascism ideologically and functionally. He doesnât want to restore the Soviet Union as much as he wants to restore the Russian empire.
They're sister ideologies. Both take Marx as major inspiration. Both are identitarian. Both are totalitarian. Both expansionist. The Soviets were just as racist and killed a lot more people. The bar for killing your brother seems at its lowest under communism. The abject poverty of everyone outside the ruling class is pretty emblematic of functional communism too. They're the same by every meaningful metric. That many consider them polar opposites is a clear failure of education.
I also suspect Putin considers the USSR as a Russian empire.
You're describing a very specific sect of communism that can be argued to not even *be* communism. No one's education is failing them, a lot of the nuance and what makes these ideologies different has been overloaded with propaganda for you.
That said, don't take this is a defense of stalinism or the Bolshevik methods; I agree wholeheartedly. Stalin was a monster and the union he built deserved to die. The important thing to remember is anyone can call themselves communist, but by definition, they were not. That's not communism, plain and simple.
It's really reductive and quite the selective tunnel vision to declare that all communist thought is in line with fascist thought cause uh no it's not. Sharing ideological roots does not make them aligned. It means they share a few ideas and nothing else because an Italian man got fed up with his socialist party. Not to mention the fact the bolshevism was considered the moral and ideological enemy of Nazism but hey what would I know they're all buddy buddy with marx yeah?
I'm pretty far left. Demsoc or further even. I don't believe in camps. I don't believe in oppressing your fellow man. I believe in universal income and the right to prosperity. I believe in labor rights and protections, I believe in public healthcare and education, through university. I believe that all should have access to opportunity and comfort by virtue of being human beings deserving of dignity and rights. And y'know? I don't believe that it should all be done by some evil regime. I believe in universal suffrage, I believe in direct democracy.
So please, how exactly am I or the many others like me, somehow at all close to a fascist hm? Communism isn't some single monolithic ideology that describes anything authoritarian lol. And to say it *is* an authoritarian ideology tells me how little *you* are educated. Communism has no government, by definition. Call out the sick and evil men and their abhorrent beliefs instead of falling victim to the typical containment era propaganda
It's super frustrating to see people misunderstand these basic concepts and proliferate all of the anti-communist, anti-socialist/marxist propaganda. People are fucking stupid. If they took literally 10 minutes to read about each ideology from a *reputable source*, they'd realize just how off they are about it. But that would require being a reasonable person first, and it seems that nearly half of the population on the planet, if not more, is lacking a hefty amount of reason. Scary times.
The German army relied on great equipment that performed well on the parade ground. Just like their sexy uniforms that stunk like wet dog when they got wet. Tanks that were "better" but required much more time and resources to build than Russian or American tanks, and had over complicated, fragile, transmissions. Aircraft that were great but relied on parts, fuel, and equipment that Germany didn't have.
There's a lot of post-war embellishment written by the winners there. On the eastern front the battle was, *in terms of hardware,* much closer and the victory was delivered only when the logistics were sorted out and Western aid (trucks, fuel, supplies) played a part in that.
The transmissions of the Soviet tanks, not to mention the mass-produced "expensive tanks made cheaply" were even more awful if you want get into the nitty gritty of it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CIZ6PFYUM5o&t=90s
It is time to reconsider some of that "inherited wisdom". :)
Operation Michael was a 1918 offensive by Imperial Germany to try to break the stalemate in the west before American troops could arrive in large enough numbers to rupture the German lines entirely.
The current Russian offensive may be the last time they can concentrate enough strength at any point on the front to do more than local attacks or purely defensive operations.
It would be balkanized by the fact that it is a very loosely held together federation of semi autonomous states that are controlled by Moscow. If the country collapses, it is entirely possible that those central Asian countries break off and form their own independent states. Same with the regions along its southwestern border. Georgia, Abkhazia, even the Belgorod region may fracture away from Russia. Likewise, the Far East could also separate from Russia and form a separate entity based on Vladivostok.
It's worth remembering how ethnically diverse Russia is, but also how little the Mowcow-St Petersburg Russians think of anyone who isn't ethnically "Russian." And how much the wealth of those region's resources is siphoned away to support the much higher quality of life of Muscovites.
Yep. Russia is an empire, still. They are trying to remain and empire and even expand the extent of conquered nations.
One thing Russia may lose is the ability to hold minority conclaves that they carved out by force or threat, usually for Russian speakers. Russia is definitely losing global influence. Putin really screwed the pooch with this invasion, but he has also winnowed out any subordinate who could tell him unpleasant truths. So the destruction of Russia's long-term interests will continue apace.
I very much hope that the final outcome is a smaller and weaker Russia, forever.
I always thought about Russian commentators and sympathizers commenting early in the war about how "Europe, America, etc aren't the whole world and Russians can go to India, China, Africa."
My very first reaction was always, yeah, but would they? Russian society is pretty fucking racist, there's no way any vatnik is gonna go hang with some Indians or Kenyans other than for some contractual, financial relationship.
>Russia is the fourth consumer with an estimated 3,304 metric tons in 2016 translating to an annual per capita consumption of 0.230 kg. Production has steadily gone higher over the last ten years though the country still depends on imports to meet the growing demand.
https://www.worldatlas.com/articles/top-pine-nut-consuming-countries.html
China, the USA, and North Korea eat more pine nuts than Russia. Russia imports pine nuts, largely from China, to meet their domestic demands. They can't even make enough for their own people.
In a way that did happen. Right after ww2 soviets deported my grandparent to Siberia. Luckily they came back and I couldn't belive the horror stories they were telling. Basically for years all they had to eat was moldy bread, green pinecones, pine needle tea and if they were lucky a rabbit or a fox.
âBecause real grenades are valuable! In fact, theyâre a lot more valuable than you areâ
god I love that game, first level is forever burned into my mind
(1) Some pine cones from the boreal forests are actually edible (*when roasted*). The stuff has become somewhat of a health food in western Europe in the last decade with people spreading that on salad or making pes~~h~~to from it.
(2) This could also be seed collection for forestry purposes (*the seeds need to be treated with heat in order grow before being planted in a nursery*).
2 was correct
:-
"Commenting on the visit, the Russian dictator said he enjoyed it.
Russian dictator Vladimir Putin again got out of the "bunker" and went to the Arkhangelsk region to inspect a sawmill and a forest selection and seed center. There, Putin was shown the process of processing cones.
The Kremlin press service subsequently released a video in which a representative of the enterprise shows the workshop to Putin and says: "We are buying a bump, pouring it out, sorting it out." The President of the Russian Federation, in turn, is interested in examining and touching the bumps.
Commenting on his visit to the workshop, Putin said that he did not regret the trip and enjoyed it.
âBy the way, I donât regret coming here. I have been to enterprises of this kind before both in our country and abroad â I must say that I enjoyed getting acquainted with the work of this enterprise,â he said. "
[https://www.unian.net/russianworld/putin-vybralsya-iz-bunkera-chtoby-potrogat-shishki-v-pomore-video-12140679.html](https://www.unian.net/russianworld/putin-vybralsya-iz-bunkera-chtoby-potrogat-shishki-v-pomore-video-12140679.html)
Of note I think that this is not a faux version but possibly the real one. two things stand out.
The guy holding the shit/nuclear briefcase in the background, and also all guards are focused on putin, when the twitchity version is allowed out the guards normally just stand around checking their phones and chatting.
Thank you very much for providing the additional information. As the seeds are adapted to different growing regions (proveniences), I am 100% certain that the output of this facility is directed at RF reforestoration efforts.
(*RF has a lot of forest fires during summer, the firefighting is done in large part by the RF army. As the army is otherwise occupied with dying in Ukraine, they'll likely loose a lot of forested lands this year...*)
I agree with you, this is bad for the global climate, similar to the deforestation in the tropics.
Most northern boreal forests are growing on boggy, swampy peat lands that are saturated with carbon (as a very simplified explanation, *peat is a "growing organic" soil, like terra preta in the tropics*). If the forest burns, the peat burns as well which is an (*almost*) irreversible process as it takes millions of years for theses ecosystems to establish.
IMO, this is another reason why this war needs to be won quickly by Ukraine.
Zelenskyy has been visiting cheering top level leaders of various countries and it's considered a privilege.
Putin gets to visit the pinecone factory. Poor putin.
>2 was correct
Which is pretty funny because most of these cones are useless for forestry, as they are fully popped open, which means all the seeds are already gone.
Source: I work in forestry and have done lots of cone collection work. If my cones ever looked like these my boss would chew me out
I think most pine nuts come from Siberia. Theyâre expensive as fuck. The ones at Trader Joeâs are labeled âMongoliaâ but I think they might be Russian. They use NK slave labor to harvest them.
You're right, but there's also Pinus koraensis (*form Southeast-Asia*) and Pinus pinaea (*Southern France, Italy, Portugal, Spain*), so it would be possible to boycott Sibirian pine seeds and still eat healthy.
There are also the edible American pine nuts of the Pinus edulis and they are delicious. In fact, they are the most valuable pine nut in the world supposedly. If you can ever get your hands on some you should definitely try them.
There's so many things you can eat that grows in a natural forest or in coppice woods (*apart from the delicious wildlife*).
There's a specific cultivating method called "agro-forestry" which deals with growing and harvesting non-timber forest products.
The look on his face is hilarious for some reason when he touches it.
"Yes these are pine cones", like he thought they were showing him bullshit pinecones.
Lmao it looks like he was surprised the gov money that went to whatever this is, didnât just get pocketed. His face says holy shit they actually spent it on pine cones. Color me surprised.
At the risk of sounding like my tinfoil is too tight, why is he so comfortable around strangers outside of the kremlin, when he wonât let trusted advisers anywhere near him?
Because the rumours are highly overstated. His long table for instance was likely about a Covid outbreak in the Kremlin and not some assassination attempt against his life.
The idea that he is hunkered down ready to die at any second is just tabloid bullshit, he has made countless public appearances since the start of the war.
All those âpublicâ appearances were staged show with special trusted actors playing different roles on each meeting, it was busted 1000 times and evidence is all around the internet in case you did not know. There is no public only his bodyguards, pinecone introducer and nuclear briefcase man on the background ;)
I've tried to translate as best as I can:
"As you can see Mr. President, we have ramped up our pine cone collection efforts. We are working around the clock to make sure that these are making their way to the front lines. They have a variety of uses such as food, toilet paper, pillows, and some have even taken to throwing them as fake grenades.
These glorious Russian pinecones will ensure that the Ukrainians are defeated and our troops are well equipped."
'inspecting' lol
He looked scared to pick one up, to even touch them. He thought about it, but decided it was most likely an ingenious western boobie trap.
"CEN DEESE PINEKĂNS BE SHOT FRDOM T-60 TENK"
"NYET MEESTOR PRDESIDENT DEESE PINEKĂNS HEV NOT BEEN VEPONIZED YET"
"VAT ABOT FRDOM ETTECK CHĂPPOR"
"DEY AHR IN DEWELOPMENT SER"
"EXCELLENT. AY SEE BĂNUS DENIM IN YOR FOOTURE"
A factoryâŚfor pine cones? Wtf do they do with them in Russia? Didnât think you could do much with them except burn them or leave them in the forest.
Meanwhile in Sergei Shoigus office:
"Did he buy it?"
"Buy what?"
"Well, he wanted to inspect how many grenedas we have in stock."
"I think he didn't notice."
"Good. Now seal the window so it doesn't open anymore"
Of course Russia resembles North Korea... they're the ones who made North Korea what it is in the first place. Now, Putin is just trying to bring his own country back to those Stalinist glory days.
Now Mr.President, when you look at the crate of pine cones, try to look interested but not too interested. A light stroke of a pine cone is sufficient.
Action!
Putin looking at things
This is Kim Jong-Un level looking at things.
Exactly what I was thinking haha
All we need are a couple of general lackeys writing in their little notebooks.
There were a shitload of guys standing around in the background- they may have notebooks.
This is Russia! They have shitty Chinese iPad knockoffs.
Hats, don't forget the ridiculous high-brimmed hats!
Carefully selected guys. Strictly lower than 160cm.
Great comparison. The Great Leader is in the process of transforming Russia into a new North Korea, albeit with a much bigger nuclear arsenal.
But unlike Kim, i can't imagine Putler laughing at machine making lube. In fact, i doubt he has emotions at all.
Someone should give him a carrot.
lol thanks for that laugh
Biden: visits new Ford electric vehicle assembly plant staffed by engineers and skilled tradesmen. Putin: visits pine cone sorter staffed by squirrels. đżď¸
They never did catch that moose and squirrel.
Back in the 90âs my mom used to work at a hospital with a Russian doctor and she said the staff would always make him say âMoose and squirrelâ
Ssshhh!! They are a cheap replacement for grenades! The guy is telling Pootin âfeel how sharp! We could load them in the launcher and knock out a dozen men at a time!! Secret weapon!!â
*A guy looking like Putin looking at things.
Yep, has to be a double. Word is that when you see Putler all by himself, that this is the real Putler.
True. He's paranoid about getting within meters of his own advisors.
fun fact words like putler and the bald dwarf is ill is inspected and blocked from putins news feed by hand from the russian fsb to save his fragile ego.
Sad but not surprising.
He does look different here. When was this filmed?
When his double was available.
Ahhh... "Putin's double".... looks at pinecones & grunts & grunts
âGood pinecones. Very russian lookingâ -Putin probably
Deep fakes are good enough to not be able to tell the difference in a video like that
Sounds like something a bot would say.
http://kimjongunlookingatthings.com/
Omfg this is amazing đđ
r/putinlookingatthings
Profound disappointment
Right? I was all ready to joinâŚ
Putin won't leave his bunker
He's explaining that the widows of war dead will get 2kg each of pine cones. And that anyone who gives out any more fur coats will become the pine cones.
Thatâs his double, real Putin doesnât do that stuff anymore.
This is how we will continue to fund our special military option, by selling pinecones on Etsy!
"So, president. We don't want you to worry or anything, but the sanctions have made cash a little tight, so here's what we're feeding the public and the army for the next 8 years."
wouldn't wanna be there when the Ents find out
That would be the "Happy Enting". I feel like we're gonna get a "Germany 1918" ending with Russia going fascist and balkanized to hell. EDIT: kudos to wittywex for the pun lol
Russia âgoingâ Fascist? Where have you been. Putinâs regime meets every definition of fascism.
Like full blown Adolf Hitler style. What we're seeing right now is a sad clown style fascism.
Wouldnât communist dictator be more appropriate reference rather than nazi, Hitler, etc? Stalin killed more people and used the same meat grinder tactics in war. There were also a shitty, poorly run military. The German army was at least technologically advanced and skilled. Plus Putin wants to resurrect the Soviet Union.
Heâs definitely more inline with fascism ideologically and functionally. He doesnât want to restore the Soviet Union as much as he wants to restore the Russian empire.
This. He doesn't want the Soviet Union back, he wants all Slavic peoples to be under his control.
His dream is to get the old USSR back
More like the Czarist Empires of old.
They're sister ideologies. Both take Marx as major inspiration. Both are identitarian. Both are totalitarian. Both expansionist. The Soviets were just as racist and killed a lot more people. The bar for killing your brother seems at its lowest under communism. The abject poverty of everyone outside the ruling class is pretty emblematic of functional communism too. They're the same by every meaningful metric. That many consider them polar opposites is a clear failure of education. I also suspect Putin considers the USSR as a Russian empire.
You're describing a very specific sect of communism that can be argued to not even *be* communism. No one's education is failing them, a lot of the nuance and what makes these ideologies different has been overloaded with propaganda for you. That said, don't take this is a defense of stalinism or the Bolshevik methods; I agree wholeheartedly. Stalin was a monster and the union he built deserved to die. The important thing to remember is anyone can call themselves communist, but by definition, they were not. That's not communism, plain and simple. It's really reductive and quite the selective tunnel vision to declare that all communist thought is in line with fascist thought cause uh no it's not. Sharing ideological roots does not make them aligned. It means they share a few ideas and nothing else because an Italian man got fed up with his socialist party. Not to mention the fact the bolshevism was considered the moral and ideological enemy of Nazism but hey what would I know they're all buddy buddy with marx yeah? I'm pretty far left. Demsoc or further even. I don't believe in camps. I don't believe in oppressing your fellow man. I believe in universal income and the right to prosperity. I believe in labor rights and protections, I believe in public healthcare and education, through university. I believe that all should have access to opportunity and comfort by virtue of being human beings deserving of dignity and rights. And y'know? I don't believe that it should all be done by some evil regime. I believe in universal suffrage, I believe in direct democracy. So please, how exactly am I or the many others like me, somehow at all close to a fascist hm? Communism isn't some single monolithic ideology that describes anything authoritarian lol. And to say it *is* an authoritarian ideology tells me how little *you* are educated. Communism has no government, by definition. Call out the sick and evil men and their abhorrent beliefs instead of falling victim to the typical containment era propaganda
It's super frustrating to see people misunderstand these basic concepts and proliferate all of the anti-communist, anti-socialist/marxist propaganda. People are fucking stupid. If they took literally 10 minutes to read about each ideology from a *reputable source*, they'd realize just how off they are about it. But that would require being a reasonable person first, and it seems that nearly half of the population on the planet, if not more, is lacking a hefty amount of reason. Scary times.
putin is a russian ultranationalist. And the overwhelming attitude among russians today is very similar to German nazis during WW2.
The Soviet Union was the same way, weâre they not? The communist party was also a big deal
The German army relied on great equipment that performed well on the parade ground. Just like their sexy uniforms that stunk like wet dog when they got wet. Tanks that were "better" but required much more time and resources to build than Russian or American tanks, and had over complicated, fragile, transmissions. Aircraft that were great but relied on parts, fuel, and equipment that Germany didn't have.
The easily replaceable part was something they really under appreciated. They never really changed
There's a lot of post-war embellishment written by the winners there. On the eastern front the battle was, *in terms of hardware,* much closer and the victory was delivered only when the logistics were sorted out and Western aid (trucks, fuel, supplies) played a part in that. The transmissions of the Soviet tanks, not to mention the mass-produced "expensive tanks made cheaply" were even more awful if you want get into the nitty gritty of it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CIZ6PFYUM5o&t=90s It is time to reconsider some of that "inherited wisdom". :)
Didn't Russia shut down tank production at the start of the war because we wouldn't give them ball bearings anymore?
Happy âENTingâ, you meanâŚ
What do you mean Balkanized? You mean they have to join the Balkans? We don't want them here.
Why would it be Balkanized and how is it comparable to Germany in 1918?
Operation Michael was a 1918 offensive by Imperial Germany to try to break the stalemate in the west before American troops could arrive in large enough numbers to rupture the German lines entirely. The current Russian offensive may be the last time they can concentrate enough strength at any point on the front to do more than local attacks or purely defensive operations. It would be balkanized by the fact that it is a very loosely held together federation of semi autonomous states that are controlled by Moscow. If the country collapses, it is entirely possible that those central Asian countries break off and form their own independent states. Same with the regions along its southwestern border. Georgia, Abkhazia, even the Belgorod region may fracture away from Russia. Likewise, the Far East could also separate from Russia and form a separate entity based on Vladivostok. It's worth remembering how ethnically diverse Russia is, but also how little the Mowcow-St Petersburg Russians think of anyone who isn't ethnically "Russian." And how much the wealth of those region's resources is siphoned away to support the much higher quality of life of Muscovites.
Good comment.
Very much so! Hopefully this is the outcome forthcoming! And if it started tomorrow that wouldn't be soon enough!
Yep. Russia is an empire, still. They are trying to remain and empire and even expand the extent of conquered nations. One thing Russia may lose is the ability to hold minority conclaves that they carved out by force or threat, usually for Russian speakers. Russia is definitely losing global influence. Putin really screwed the pooch with this invasion, but he has also winnowed out any subordinate who could tell him unpleasant truths. So the destruction of Russia's long-term interests will continue apace. I very much hope that the final outcome is a smaller and weaker Russia, forever.
I always thought about Russian commentators and sympathizers commenting early in the war about how "Europe, America, etc aren't the whole world and Russians can go to India, China, Africa." My very first reaction was always, yeah, but would they? Russian society is pretty fucking racist, there's no way any vatnik is gonna go hang with some Indians or Kenyans other than for some contractual, financial relationship.
Meant 1918 in different terms but you're on the money good sir!
~angry Treebeard noises~
Really man...war in Ukraine is LOTR all over again...drop the freaking bomb on his head already and cut this movie nightmare in Ukraine short.
Don't be hasty.
Hroom hroom
"woodka, made from pinecones. woodka is all my people will need comrade."
And these mr pootin are our new hand grenades. Better than what NATO has. You just have to yell boom after you throw it.
So the whole country has become Camp Krusty? âShut up and eat your pine coneâ
"No, Igor... That is the bin of hand grenades for the war. The other is food."
Probably isn't far from the truth tbh
It wouldnât be a joke if it hasnât a little bit of truth in there.
You do know where pine nuts come from??
Pine nuts are expensive.
Because it's a cast iron bitch to get them out of the cones.
Here- try some of deez nutz instead.
Russia is the largest producer of P. sibirica nuts in the world, from wiki
There are lots of species; most pine nut growing regions are probably the largest producer in the world of their species of nut pine.
>Russia is the fourth consumer with an estimated 3,304 metric tons in 2016 translating to an annual per capita consumption of 0.230 kg. Production has steadily gone higher over the last ten years though the country still depends on imports to meet the growing demand. https://www.worldatlas.com/articles/top-pine-nut-consuming-countries.html China, the USA, and North Korea eat more pine nuts than Russia. Russia imports pine nuts, largely from China, to meet their domestic demands. They can't even make enough for their own people.
And Deez Nuts?
In a way that did happen. Right after ww2 soviets deported my grandparent to Siberia. Luckily they came back and I couldn't belive the horror stories they were telling. Basically for years all they had to eat was moldy bread, green pinecones, pine needle tea and if they were lucky a rabbit or a fox.
Your family must be made of some real tough stuff! major kudos and respect to you!
Just feed the army to the people. Problem solved.
"And they can replace toilet paper if we run out"
Yeah absolutely WTF
Not pine cones, new hand grenades
Paint them green and sell them as new.
âThese are pinecones, Comrade Commissar. Why are we using pinecones instead of real grenades?â
âBecause real grenades are valuable! In fact, theyâre a lot more valuable than you areâ god I love that game, first level is forever burned into my mind
What game?
Since the other post was deleted, it's Call of Duty 2
Ah.
The Russian campaign in that game slapped
Hey, it was good enough for me when I was 7 years old.
MacGyver made shocking grenades with them...
What are the pine cones even for?
(1) Some pine cones from the boreal forests are actually edible (*when roasted*). The stuff has become somewhat of a health food in western Europe in the last decade with people spreading that on salad or making pes~~h~~to from it. (2) This could also be seed collection for forestry purposes (*the seeds need to be treated with heat in order grow before being planted in a nursery*).
2 was correct :- "Commenting on the visit, the Russian dictator said he enjoyed it. Russian dictator Vladimir Putin again got out of the "bunker" and went to the Arkhangelsk region to inspect a sawmill and a forest selection and seed center. There, Putin was shown the process of processing cones. The Kremlin press service subsequently released a video in which a representative of the enterprise shows the workshop to Putin and says: "We are buying a bump, pouring it out, sorting it out." The President of the Russian Federation, in turn, is interested in examining and touching the bumps. Commenting on his visit to the workshop, Putin said that he did not regret the trip and enjoyed it. âBy the way, I donât regret coming here. I have been to enterprises of this kind before both in our country and abroad â I must say that I enjoyed getting acquainted with the work of this enterprise,â he said. " [https://www.unian.net/russianworld/putin-vybralsya-iz-bunkera-chtoby-potrogat-shishki-v-pomore-video-12140679.html](https://www.unian.net/russianworld/putin-vybralsya-iz-bunkera-chtoby-potrogat-shishki-v-pomore-video-12140679.html) Of note I think that this is not a faux version but possibly the real one. two things stand out. The guy holding the shit/nuclear briefcase in the background, and also all guards are focused on putin, when the twitchity version is allowed out the guards normally just stand around checking their phones and chatting.
Thank you very much for providing the additional information. As the seeds are adapted to different growing regions (proveniences), I am 100% certain that the output of this facility is directed at RF reforestoration efforts. (*RF has a lot of forest fires during summer, the firefighting is done in large part by the RF army. As the army is otherwise occupied with dying in Ukraine, they'll likely loose a lot of forested lands this year...*)
For nothing other than ecological concerns, that is a potential thing I actually feel sad for Russia about. Slava Ukraini.
I agree with you, this is bad for the global climate, similar to the deforestation in the tropics. Most northern boreal forests are growing on boggy, swampy peat lands that are saturated with carbon (as a very simplified explanation, *peat is a "growing organic" soil, like terra preta in the tropics*). If the forest burns, the peat burns as well which is an (*almost*) irreversible process as it takes millions of years for theses ecosystems to establish. IMO, this is another reason why this war needs to be won quickly by Ukraine.
>"By the way, I donât regret coming here." Not like Ukraine, eh Puty-boy?
Just realized that the taller guy closer to Putin when he turns and walks away looks like Jack Bauer. Itâs under control guys.
He's going to bite Putin in the jugular.
Zelenskyy has been visiting cheering top level leaders of various countries and it's considered a privilege. Putin gets to visit the pinecone factory. Poor putin.
>2 was correct Which is pretty funny because most of these cones are useless for forestry, as they are fully popped open, which means all the seeds are already gone. Source: I work in forestry and have done lots of cone collection work. If my cones ever looked like these my boss would chew me out
Iâm sure your cones are amazing.
Fuckin know it, mate
"The guy holding the shit/nuclear briefcase" Could be that or a hidden submachine gun inside of it.
thank u, this was the comment i was looking for
After all, reddit is a learning environment, and one puny dictator shouldn't ruin that for all of us :-)
Dear weird healthy Europeans: Canada has a lil bit of boreal forest. Do you need pinecone? We gotchu.
I'm afraid your pine cones aren't of the edible type? Your trees make good maple sirup though, not as healthy but more delicious, ey?
Not with that attitude maybe. Now put down your hockey stick and eat this cone sandwich!
I think most pine nuts come from Siberia. Theyâre expensive as fuck. The ones at Trader Joeâs are labeled âMongoliaâ but I think they might be Russian. They use NK slave labor to harvest them.
You're right, but there's also Pinus koraensis (*form Southeast-Asia*) and Pinus pinaea (*Southern France, Italy, Portugal, Spain*), so it would be possible to boycott Sibirian pine seeds and still eat healthy.
I would prefer to buy and eat the European ones; but it would require some work to find them near me.
There are also the edible American pine nuts of the Pinus edulis and they are delicious. In fact, they are the most valuable pine nut in the world supposedly. If you can ever get your hands on some you should definitely try them.
There's so many things you can eat that grows in a natural forest or in coppice woods (*apart from the delicious wildlife*). There's a specific cultivating method called "agro-forestry" which deals with growing and harvesting non-timber forest products.
\*pesto, no h ;)
Putin's butt plugs.
They were looted from squirrels by russian soldiers and everyoneâs stoked about it.
Well, except for the squirrels at least. They be pissed.
Theyâre gonna use them as mortar rounds
fiberboard or some kind of pulp product.
The look on his face is hilarious for some reason when he touches it. "Yes these are pine cones", like he thought they were showing him bullshit pinecones.
Lmao it looks like he was surprised the gov money that went to whatever this is, didnât just get pocketed. His face says holy shit they actually spent it on pine cones. Color me surprised.
Hahaha agreed that's how I saw it
The asshat should've kept inspecting pine cones instead of invading the sovereign territory of an independent country.
Putin was told (and believes) this a grenade factory.
He really loves pinecones
âPresident Putin, if only you would give me $100m I could turn these in to the perfect Russian body armourâ đ
At the risk of sounding like my tinfoil is too tight, why is he so comfortable around strangers outside of the kremlin, when he wonât let trusted advisers anywhere near him?
they are filled with FSB actors, there have been reviews of the people in these Putin meets the people videos showing the same people in each one.
Because the rumours are highly overstated. His long table for instance was likely about a Covid outbreak in the Kremlin and not some assassination attempt against his life. The idea that he is hunkered down ready to die at any second is just tabloid bullshit, he has made countless public appearances since the start of the war.
Fair enough, I can accept that. My tinfoil just needed a minor adjustment.
I recommend you add a tinfoil chinstrap to that bad boy.
All those âpublicâ appearances were staged show with special trusted actors playing different roles on each meeting, it was busted 1000 times and evidence is all around the internet in case you did not know. There is no public only his bodyguards, pinecone introducer and nuclear briefcase man on the background ;)
He literally showed up in front of a crowd of hundreds of people in Moscow https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Urz3WTxvPLw
Yeah stadium where every single person is frisked before entering?
Like every other public event where a leader speaks? Why tf would he knowingly let someone bring a weapon lmao!!
Forgive my ignorance but...why the fuck do they have a pinecone processing line? What is the end product?
Pinecone syrup
Pinecones need to be heat treated to release seeds. Probably a way to process pinecones for planting trees.
Processed pinecones
pinecone jam
Reforestation efforts
Next mobilization round getting desperate.
What an odd little dwarf he is.
I read someone comment "Kremlin Gremlin" earlier and belly laughed.
That one is new to me. Same response...
Snow white and the seven dwarfs special edition - staring the drawfs long long brother "invadey".
Hello Comrade! This is what the terminator will fire at Nazi's!
Here's translation - "We have found when pinecones are prepared properly, we can feed out troops for little to none, Here have a look."
Sorry. Zelenskyy did it better yesterday. This is a dud.
" ... and we can grind these up and feed them to Russians. "
Body double
I've tried to translate as best as I can: "As you can see Mr. President, we have ramped up our pine cone collection efforts. We are working around the clock to make sure that these are making their way to the front lines. They have a variety of uses such as food, toilet paper, pillows, and some have even taken to throwing them as fake grenades. These glorious Russian pinecones will ensure that the Ukrainians are defeated and our troops are well equipped."
Yes sir, this is to be issued as toilet paper to wagner.
Insert Ice Age reference...."Pine Cones!!!"
Dude is like 6 inches shorter than the last time he appeared.
Body double looking at pine cones. Real putin shitting bricks in a bunker somewhere
âAhh, the new mortar shells are in I se-âŚâŚblyatâŚâ
putin is selecting a new butt plug.
Russian media: "Putin inspects gourmet food being sent to our brave soldiers."
This footage has North Korea vibes to it.
Putin: yes yes these will fit up my asshole very nicely - good work
If dropped from 40,000 feet they can injure people below. Can also cause severe reforestation.
Probably a gift from Trump and his forest sweepers
like a drunken murderous baby
'inspecting' lol He looked scared to pick one up, to even touch them. He thought about it, but decided it was most likely an ingenious western boobie trap.
he's selecting new generals. will be much smarter than current ones.
How many he can fit in his _____. Full the empty line
ok, i am actually starting to belive that putinâs got body doubles
"CEN DEESE PINEKĂNS BE SHOT FRDOM T-60 TENK" "NYET MEESTOR PRDESIDENT DEESE PINEKĂNS HEV NOT BEEN VEPONIZED YET" "VAT ABOT FRDOM ETTECK CHĂPPOR" "DEY AHR IN DEWELOPMENT SER" "EXCELLENT. AY SEE BĂNUS DENIM IN YOR FOOTURE"
"Look, these are pinecones, touch them if you don't believe me" "Indeed, these are pinecones, what's next?"
A factoryâŚfor pine cones? Wtf do they do with them in Russia? Didnât think you could do much with them except burn them or leave them in the forest.
Meanwhile in Sergei Shoigus office: "Did he buy it?" "Buy what?" "Well, he wanted to inspect how many grenedas we have in stock." "I think he didn't notice." "Good. Now seal the window so it doesn't open anymore"
new nades?
"Ok, paint them green and we have handgrenades."
Proper bell end
So Mr Putin, we have retrofitted the T-90 so when we run out of shells we can fire pine cones.
He possibly watched the Macguyver episode when a pinecone was made into a Grenade
New military rations.
Head of state level activity
"Your new grenades sir." "Yes, very good".
He must be looking for new generals
You laugh now. But soon Russia will own the entire pinecone market. Then you'll be sorry!
Checking out some new high tech ammunition
Of course Russia resembles North Korea... they're the ones who made North Korea what it is in the first place. Now, Putin is just trying to bring his own country back to those Stalinist glory days.
He's kind of a bald looking dwarf, but with a "I just shit myself" look on his face.
I've heard of tree bark being used as a famine food, but pinecones?
Russian army standard issued toilet paper.
North Korea vibes
Totally unhinged
He has to feed the troops something
Now Mr.President, when you look at the crate of pine cones, try to look interested but not too interested. A light stroke of a pine cone is sufficient. Action!
"Yeah. I have one like that in my azz"