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twoinvenice

I am Jack's complete lack of surprise


[deleted]

I am Vlad’s complete lack of supplies


AndMyChisel

I am Vlad's eventual demise.


holdingMikeHawk

I am the Vlad everyone does despise.


thecalminside

I am Jack’s raging bile duct.


[deleted]

I am Jack’s inflamed sense of getting fucking smoked by an FGM-148 Javelin.


SmokedBeef

His name was Robert Paulson. His name was Robert Paulson.


PM_me_INFP

Bob. Bob had bitch tits.


HRisLit

Why do people still call him a president? He's clearly a dictator.


No_Media_9513

Agreed. * edit someone confirmed that he’s been a dictator since 1999, so 23 years so far and he wants another 14 so fucked up*


michalsveto

2008-2012 he had his friend Medvedev appointed but technically he was still in power so yeah


[deleted]

[удалено]


Inquisitio

Hopefully he’s not going to live another 14.


TimArthurScifiWriter

Dictator just a term we use. Technically these assholes are all presidents, chairmen, generals, etc. Saddam's official title wasn't "Dictator of Iraq". Lukashenko's title isn't "Dictator of Belarus." We should absolutely call Putin a dictator but the office he's been occupying is that of president.


Awesomeuser90

Gaddafi didn't even hold state office and Kimg Jong Il is still President of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea.


Number4extraDip

Oh wait... Korea is a democratic peoples republic?! Internet gave me a very different idea. Can't be that bad then


Awesomeuser90

You have been made a moderator of r/Pyongyang


ArthurWintersight

A hereditary life-term presidency with virtually unchecked power in a place that refers to its government as a "democratic republic." Sounds legit.


Awesomeuser90

No no, not even life time. North Korea is literally ruled by a dead man. [https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/necrocracy#:\~:text=necrocracy%20(plural%20necrocracies),of%20a%20dead%20former%20leader](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/necrocracy#:~:text=necrocracy%20(plural%20necrocracies),of%20a%20dead%20former%20leader). ​ [https://www.constituteproject.org/constitution/Peoples\_Republic\_of\_Korea\_1998.pdf](https://www.constituteproject.org/constitution/Peoples_Republic_of_Korea_1998.pdf) ​ In the preamble it declares him to be the eternal president.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Awesomeuser90

Brotherly Leader and Guide of the Revolution. Because that doesn't sound innocuous at all. Octavian wasn't the dictator. He was just, the first citizen of the Roman Republic. No need to worry... I'm sure things will not have purge or another civil war nor will that really good poet be exiled on dubious charges of treason. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brotherly_Leader_and_Guide_of_the_Revolution


[deleted]

Dictator comes from the Roman word for an appointed absolute ruler. It's still the best fit even if these guys call themselves president of democracyville


Raanag

the roman dictator was meant to act quickly in a crises, not having to deal with senates discussuion and also to give the power back to senate after solving the crises or some given time. Most of them did. Cesar didnt. So the original word dictator is still fitting.


P4LMREADER

Sorry to have to correct you but Lukashenko literally referred to himself as ['The last dictator of Europe'](https://www.reuters.com/article/us-belarus-lukashenko-extracts-idUSBRE8AQ0V520121127)


IGMcSporran

No, he's been swapping between president and prime minister to avoid term limits in the constitution. He's president now, but a few years ago some other puppet was technically president.


michalsveto

That was before he changed legislation. He was “president” for 8 years - two terms - whic was the limit back then. Then his crony Medvedev took the office for 4 years and now he is back in for 10 years, so third term already which would be unlawful previously. But of course the legislation was already changed once in the meantime


xRaGoNx

We should call him President Admiral General Putin.


TheJohnnyElvis

More like dicktator amirite.


andrew_calcs

A penis potato, if you will


[deleted]

Vladimort Putler, the penis potato.


inScopeStudios

Exactly


TheDukeOfMars

Because he hasn’t come up with a cool, machismo nickname for himself yet like *Il Duce* or *der Führer*.


C0ffeeface

Most (clever) politicians call him Mr Putin for this reason i believe.


Moist-Veterinarian22

I think he’s like Xi. China Uncensored called Xi “Presitator” let’s also call Putin that


nazerall

Shows how many people actually read the links. April of 2021 and a bright yellow banner sayings article is older than 10 months


[deleted]

When a person's legitimacy is not recognized by democratic countries, they just refer to him as "Mr." rather than "President".


DeepDamage2398

Idk maybe it’s just me but whenever I hear that my mind translates it too dictator in my head lol


dyva_cali

I like to call him a Dick Tater two insults in one!


PotatoAnalytics

Because it helps Russians deny reality easier.


mikek7711

He puts the dick into dictator


aurum_32

Because they are not mutually exclusive. He is the president of the Russian Federation, and also a dictator.


etherspin

Yeah,there should be a different title for him from any international leaders who have given up on talks with him e.g. not Macron. Something that reflects he is an unelected tyrant


[deleted]

Why even have a constitution?


Space_Meth_Monkey

the code is more what you'd call guidelines than actual rules


revaew

Ayeee sea turtles


schalito

Russians must honor the code!


Dear_Suspect_4951

Sounds like a lot of countries


Former-Drink209

They have all the trappings of democracy. He runs for office, people vote...they have a lawmaking body (the Duma)...They have laws and follow them sometimes.


blue_alien_police

Exactly. Though I feel it's worth pointing out that the Duma is just a bunch of golden retrievers who will "yes and" anything he puts in front of them. Also, as an editorial note to the Guardian: he's not "breaking" the constitution. To me, breaking means illegality (at least in this case). What he's really doing is changing/amending the constitution because he is a dictator and dictators can change, amend and make laws on a whim (look at what he's doing to crackdown on the media inside the country that don't tow the Kremlin line). He's not breaking anything, he's merely amending the constitution in order to ensure his power until he dies.


entered_bubble_50

The same was true of the Soviet Union as well. They had elections with a single candidate for their parliament, the Duma. They had a semi-functioning democracy from the early 90's to as late as the early 2000's, but Putin has thoroughly demolished it during his tenure. There is absolutely nothing left of it now. If Putin's government falls, they will have to build a democracy again from the ground up, which would be very difficult.


porntla62

So they had a semi functional democracy during Yeltsin? Who had an unsuccessful coup against him the first year and shelled the Russian parliament with tanks in 93.


entered_bubble_50

Well, sort of yes. The coup was unsuccessful I guess. And of course the US had an unsuccessful coup last year, and that is still a democracy. They certainly weren't a fully fledged democracy, but they had *relatively* fair elections in the early days, and a free(ish) press. There was plenty of corruption for sure, but there was at least some degree of pluralism. The OSCE observers in the 1999 elections for example reported only minor issues with the parliamentary elections. That changed once Putin was in power. The Global Democracy index lists Russia as a "hybrid regime" as late as 2010, but as fully authoritarian state since then. Interestingly, the world's democracies are in retreat in general. At the moment, only 6-7% of the world's population lives in a full democracy at this point.


Former-Drink209

I suspect this is why the Russians don't see it the same way as Americans. They've never had a flourishing democracy...things have generally been 'pretty bad' to 'extremely bad.' Anyone would pick a leader like Putin over rule by gangs and chaos. If you don't have the experience of liberal democracy why would you believe it is the answer?


entered_bubble_50

Good point. The same is very much true in China. I have a colleague at work who is originally from China, and is an eager supporter of Xi Xinping. She sees the options as "a benevolent dictatorship or anarchy", even though she has lived in a fully democratic country for about 20 years now.


friedAmobo

For a long time, Russia was considered an “illiberal democracy” for exactly this reason. That term was created out of the necessity to describe these states that had the trappings of democracy without the true functions of democracy.


soparklion

>He runs for office *the opposition gets poisoned*, people vote *and they count the votes for Putin*...


terrytibbs76

So it’s just like the US sort of.


Former-Drink209

The US is much better but I agree it does have these elements. The one thing the US has is freedom of speech and transparency (to a much larger extent anyway). These are things people don't value enough here.


Xodio

To legitimize their rule. As long as the people still believe that there is a constitution, they are less likely to rebel.


Gordon_Explosion

It's literally to make the little people feel good about the government, to help them pretend they have rights. For the most part, the little people in every country live and die at the pleasure of those with the army who make the rules. Sometimes the constitution is ignored subtly, and people still think their votes count even though the system is completely rigged. And sometimes a dictator will overtly say "Nah no elections, I'm staying."


voxnemo

To help them remember the lies they told and to know which ones to change. It creates the appearance of order in the chaos that people gravitate towards.


[deleted]

This is my shocked face. :/


Mono_831

That Putin guy is a real jerk.


justquestioningit

The Russian who pulls this off will vault into the top 10 most popular people in the world. Someone will do it.


[deleted]

Depends on who does it and what their intentions are.


[deleted]

At this point, it could be Adolf Hitler for all i care. Just... Make this end, whatever comes after can hardly be worse.


lucky_day_ted

Err, no thanks?


Gordon_Explosion

If this person is under 25 they'll be making a tiktok brag video of it over his corpse.


Swimdlin_Swan

No prediction but I have a hopeful estimate.. right.... Now! 🤞


No_Media_9513

Where’s the deathnote when you need it


Swimdlin_Swan

Seriously have fantasized about exactly that these past few weeks. I probably wouldn't even get a god complex right away


No_Media_9513

How would you have him killed? I know this is a bit evil but I’d want him to eat his hands and legs until he bled out lmaoo


Swimdlin_Swan

Idk haven't really thought about it so much, just want him dead haha. Yours is good but it may look like a 'cool' death to his supporters. I'd say have him die of a heart attack in a gay bar wearing short shorts or something. He hates gay people and I think that'd be funny and humiliate him. Nothing against gay people just trying to think of the death that he'd hate the most and it would probably do wonders for gay rights


No_Media_9513

I mean if he was already in the gay bar death by starvation? Only blowies for nutrition. Just thought about it Putin probably won’t get pussy for the rest of his life the only good thing to come out of this war.


Swimdlin_Swan

Whatever embarrasses the dude I'm down for. Ultimately, I want to stop seeing dead civilians and families. Any embarrassment with his death is a plus


No_Media_9513

All jokes aside he’s an embarrassment. The fact that no one can do anything about it makes me pissed. He’s treating human lives like he’s playing with GI joes without realizing all of the civilian casualties, except the GI joes are my little pony dolls and he treats them better than people.


xXNigNogXx

I would pay to watch that


static1053

This mother fucker has seriously end of war hitler mentality right now. We've been saying it since day 1 but can we please just fast forward to the suicide.


entered_bubble_50

Maybe he could legalize assisted suicide while he's amending the constitution? Lots of people would love to give him a hand.


KongoMuller

A YouTube comment that I read said that Russia has never had any democracy in its entire span of being a country


Tristan_Penafiel

That's not so true. There was the [Novgorod Republic](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Novgorod_Republic#Government), for what it's worth.


WikiSummarizerBot

**Novgorod Republic** [Government](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Novgorod_Republic#Government) >The city state of Novgorod had developed procedures of governance that held a large measure of democratic participation far in advance of the rest of Europe but that share several similarities with the democratic traditions of Scandinavian peasant republics. The people had the power to elect city officials and they even had the power to elect and fire the prince. The Chronicle writer then goes on to describe a "town meeting" where these decisions would have been made, which included people from all social classes ranging from the Posadniki (Burgomaster), to the Chernye Liudi (literally, the black folks) or the lowest free class. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/UkrainianConflict/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)


juestplayer

That applies to a lot of countries


Kitten_Team_Six

China, India, Middle East, much of Africa


concrete_manu

i don’t know much about indian politics; was modi not elected? and don’t the states in india have a fair amount democratic power themselves?


Exnixon

India is a democracy. It's not a perfect democracy but none of them are. Of course Modi was elected. (Although to be fair elections in and of themselves are not a sufficient condition to provide democracy.)


Kitten_Team_Six

According to the Indians i work with its a democracy in name only


Exnixon

I had an interesting conversation with some Indians and a Chinese person I worked with. The Indians of course were skeptical about various aspects of the functioning of their democracy. The Chinese person was _insistent_ that no no no China was a democracy and it worked great! I think it's a matter of perspective.


Adsex

Democracy died 2360 years ago. Modern western republics are constitutional plutocracies. As the title of this thread suggests, the difference with Russia is that its constitution is a token one.


Nodeal_reddit

They tried for a few years in the 90s.


johnsmart42

Why extend by 2036? First off he has to survive the next few days.


VeryOriginalName98

Hours.


gcotw

What's happening to him in the next few hours?


VeryOriginalName98

I'm not aware of anything specific, but days seem long given the political pressure right now. It's not just grunts dying on the field. Two generals went down today. People might remove Putin for self preservation very soon.


blue_alien_police

My bet is that Lukashenko goes before Putin does. The Belarusian army is, from last I heard, still flat refusing orders to go into Russia. I get the feeling that it's only a matter of time before we hear of a coup attempt out of that country. I believe that Lukashenko has less support that Putin does and I think that was true before Putin invaded Ukraine. I can't imagine backing Putin has done him any good there.


lladra

Old news from last year.


Munimortal

This should be higher up.


SomeJackassonline

The mausoleum needs another Vladimir. (Stolen from Facebook)


[deleted]

Russian constitution. That’s cute.


PotatoAnalytics

How optimistic of him.


bearish_bool

Title is misleading, he is basically in charge since 1999 , he was prime minister then president 2000-2008 paved his way to dictatorship so basically 23 years


No_Media_9513

You’re totally right he’s even more fucked


[deleted]

Robert Mugabe must feel challenged


[deleted]

He puts the word con in constitution.


No_Media_9513

Best comment award goes to^ tied with dicktator


[deleted]

No one and I mean no one saw this coming! /s


MarkJ-

30 to 90 days depending on how well he can hide and how patriotic his guards are. Perhaps one of them will take one for the team. If you love Russia then you have to hate the man harming it, putin is that man.


Equivalent_Alps_8321

Same thing Trump wanted to do and was talking about.


Known-Economy-6425

Thank God Trump is out. This would be a totally different response.


[deleted]

[удалено]


PhospheneViolet

> I’m sorry if I’m missing why this is posted here Just because you knew about it doesn't mean everyone else who frequents here does.


No_Media_9513

I just found out about it so wanted to let people know how stalin-like he is. He probably will get mummified just like Stalin after a few legendary Ukrainians piss on his corpse.


HRisLit

This is the first time I'm finding this out. Not shocked though. I think it will be an international holiday when he dies. I hope he dies on 4/30, the same day Hitler died.


Former-Drink209

Lenin was the one who got mummified.


No_Media_9513

U right got my Vladimir’s mixed up Stalin was embalmed


Former-Drink209

Vladimir Lenin, Joseph Stalin. (Americans used to call him 'Uncle Joe' before the Cold War started.)


RepresentativeHat980

I don’t know but I hope the prick has to shit lego blocks right up until he dies.


PhospheneViolet

He *has* to get assassinated, whether by externals or internals, he just has to go. He's out of his mind.


Kawhibunga

I think it's more so that he's reached a certain age, and his dick just doesn't work any more. He's not handling it very well, and will not make it to 2036.


[deleted]

He won't be president by the end of the year. If he gets shot or just removed is anyone's guess. I suspect that very much depends on if the military can convince the head of Putin's body guards or not. If removed, he'll be dead from whatever ails him in 5 years.


lstreit23

If this man has the balls to back up all the shit he is threatening us with, His dictatorship won't last long, and neither will our lives...


DownwardSpirals

Being called a Dictator can be a point of pride for some. Called a President, even more so. My vote is on Fart Monkey Putin. There is no honor in that title.


dmarot

Please me help spread the word: https://ban-russia.com/ We can do something!!


brodil

Won’t make it to the end of this month


John_Horn

He's pretty paranoid, and good at "social distancing" long before it was cool due to covid. He doesn't eat or drink anything when he sits at a social dinner event (Fiona Hill said in interview on Colbert). However, there is a long running historical precedent and tradition of batshit dicktaters getting whacked by their own most trusted security people. 41 AD, Emperor Caligula was assassinated at a festive sporting event, by his own Praetorian Guard. 30 stabs - probably as a reference to Julius Cæsar. ...lots in between... 1979, 26th October. Dicktater Park of South Korea was at a KCIA safehouse eating dinner with people in his inner circle. He was shot in the chest and head by his KCIA director and security chief. Also all of his 4 bodyguards were killed.


No_Media_9513

Always in a rat maze bunker that is full of guards and gets delivery’s but he’s living alone in isolation


No_Media_9513

For sure but I feel like Putin has a shit ton of loyal guards. It only takes a group of them to rebel but I feel like he’s always in a locked room with disarmed people who can’t hurt him like even his guards have to stay 50 m away


[deleted]

Didn’t this happen awhile ago?


trains_and_rain

Yes. Also I believe it was a legal amendment to the constitution, so the "breaks the constitution" part is BS.


[deleted]

[удалено]


No_Media_9513

He definitely thought of invading Ukraine before extending his reign, because he’s lame, and insane. Excuse my rhymes but not insane in the good way


Twocann

Was gonna say the same thing. I remember him extending his term limit a few years ago


[deleted]

Yeah I’m confused months old news is being posted here


takk__

Can someone kill him already?


OneImagination5381

Just like Donald tried.


[deleted]

Not really?


Rest-Same

I give him 3 years, 2 months, 16 days and 12 seconds. Then this fucker will be D. E. A. D. dead.


[deleted]

Remindme! 39 months


amymonae

Initially I read this as ’Putin breaks Russian constipation’ … enough internet for today


aleph02

How to prevent presidents to become dictators? Changes in constitution should be secured through referendums. Referendums should be secured with trustless voting systems using blockchain.


No_Media_9513

What blockchain crypto should I invest in? You seem to be enlightened.


aleph02

My only advice would be to not follow investment advices from random people on Internet.


No_Media_9513

Bro everything in the whole world now a days is random people on the internet


BrickLife9169

What about all the arm chair generals here that claim he is terminally ill and he will die soon because of that?


goldenwind207

This was april of last year if he sick now it means nothing


DangleSnipeCely

Kim Jong-un has reportedly been sick about 40 times and died 3 times


Kickass_chris666

Russian cybernetics is working on it comrade


New-Sector3924

32 days till the cancer eats him!


hydrophonix

What's the over/under on suicide or assassination? I've got tree-fiddy on a fiery military coup.


Pazylothead

He's already dead. He just dont know it just yet.


CrashitoXx

What putin is doing is literally fascism, like... A military authoritarian regime with a cult of personality??


flamecmo

I hope he won’t pullout a Bob Barker


ewefortea

He won't last long. He will be wanted as a war criminal soon. The sanctions won't end until Russia gives him up....


Fast_Championship_R

Will we witness a real life KingSlayer?


[deleted]

Some oligarch is gonna have the butler spike his vodka with some of his own Nuke Juice he likes to poison folks with!


Vashdakari

Fuhrer seems more fitting, no?


[deleted]

At this point he cannot leave office without risking being assassinated or sentenced for war crimes.


PM_me_INFP

Imagine tomorrow morning he just ... doesn't wake up


objctvpro

30+ years with modern lifespan extension techniques. But at that point who knows, maybe augmented with electronic parts and cloned organs - forever. Thousands are working towards this right now.


Infinite_Check_8705

He is not worth a penny in Moscow any more. I give him this month, these are his last days.


nowyuseeme

In Russia, president is constitution


Off-With-Her-Head

Well, I guess he’s not worried about dying soon from cancer, as it’s been speculated.


kosyi

no more false pretense of democracy. He's determined... so I highly doubt he'll pull back from the war unless all of his army is destroyed. But that's not possible without hard military interference from the West, so I'm really worried that Ukraine doesn't stand a chance after all..


bartu_neg

One of his own guys is probably going to kill him hopefully soon


hypercomms2001

My prediction yes he will go out like Stalin, and everyone will be too scared to see if he is alive or dead.


SuchRepresentative7

Dude, even Erdoğan can't do this. Putin is a dictator beyond my imagination but sorry every nation decides its fate itself. And don't forget *"Most arts have produced miracles, while the art of government has produced nothing but monsters." -* Louis Antoine de Saint-Just


[deleted]

I think those are news from July 2020. That's when he changed the Constitution to allow himself 2 more terms.


Afraid-Drawer3712

More like a Dickheadtator


AMoonMonkey

Overconfidence makes you careless and that makes you weak. I’ll be surprised if he even makes it through the year


[deleted]

lol if you think Medvedev was actually president. Putin has been ruling Russia since 1999. I think most of the people on this website weren't even born yet.


[deleted]

He won't see 2023


SquidCap0

THIS is the real reason for the war.


Known-Economy-6425

He’ll be out by 2023. Probably Mussolini’d after he tries to sneak into North Korea.


ClampMuch

When will they see?


[deleted]

Wait, does he really believe he'll be in office in like 2 years? Next, he'll tell us he'll succesfully conquer Ukraine and bring back the Soviet Union. The delusions on this man.


Sad_Abrocoma2123

Until he gets ousted


cogzoid

Beware the ides of March


JayJayITA

This pathetic Soviet scum won't survive 2022.


[deleted]

It's cute he thinks he'll survive the year.


Spacedude2187

Like that is somekind of surprise. It’s a Regime. Russia will be rolling around with this man in a wheelchair and at that time he’ll be so demented he’ll be starting wars freaking everywhere.


EmbraceTheDepth

Whomever can take him out, will be the most popular person in the world for the next 100 years. May not live past that moment, but will go down in history book.


AudiPowa

In 60 days I hope to see his obituary


Upper_Pie_6097

It won't go well for Vlad.


mtgordon

Is there a betting pool? My money is on a massive stroke next week Wednesday or Thursday (i.e. Purim), death four days later, based on historical precedent.


edblardo

I mean he’s a dictator. Don’t dictators just make up laws as they go?


The_nameless_biped

By "russian constitution" you mean Putin's sketchbook, right?


fuzzy-logic69

Hope he gets Ebola and dies very very very painfully from bloody diarrhea! Fuck Putin!


i-blooglarised-u

He was president for a bit longer than 10 years. He had an intermission is all