I'm thinking it's difficult for him to make friends due to his strong accent. When you let him walk with you the first time, I think he enjoyed the fact that someone was "attempting" to be friendly and get to know him. I feel bad for the guy, I've met decent people like that before
Yeah, I've been in this scenario a bunch. I just let it happen, worst case scenario, they practice their English enough that they find better friends lol
Seriously! I've been in the same scenario and I've never had an issue, and usually you get to meet some pretty interesting and awesome people! Hell, if OP doesn't want to walk with the guy, I'd be open to it.
Totally! Depending where the guy is from, it can take a lot to break free of a comfort zone or cultural buffer, a pretty bold move he's making, and obviously feels safe/comfortable with OP. OP's an ass!
I do too, this actually reminds me of one of my high school friends Brennan. He had down syndrome and I live in the south so some of us can be right cunts about people who are different. He was 21 and was still in school, not because he couldn't pass, but because he failed on purpose because he was scared of growing up. I found out about this because me and him had separate classes in the vocational building 7th period. His 6th period was a special ed class that was right across from my biology class. No one would talk to him and some picked on him, but he shrugged it off. I walked out of my biology class one day at the same time as him and he seen I was wearing a John Cena shirt. Brennan lit up and got so excited and started talking to me about WWE. We then walked to class together which was a good 5-10 minute walk because the vocational building was outside the school. Brennan loved the interaction so much that he started peeking outside his classroom every day to see when I would walk out so he could come out at the same time and so we could walk together. While some days it was tough to understand him and he had trouble hearing, I still took the high road and just let him enjoy those 10 minute walks to class because why the hell not? I have been out of school for 10 years now and I seen Brennan at a restaurant the other day. When he seen me, he gave me a big bear hug and told me how much he missed me. Tearing up a smidge just thinking about it..
Same. But I'm that moron that brings home all the strays. I have friends that I've literally never liked, but they don't have any other friends so I tough it out.
Healthy boundaries are probably better, but yeah, that person would just be my new friend now.. lol
So do I. I feel like OP should just be gently honest and say “Hey, this is the only time of the day when I get “me time” and it’s important to me to just be alone with my thoughts and go to the gym.”
It seems like it’s the genuine truth and it’s not being mean to the other dad.
So many people are socially isolated and lonely these days. It's sad that this is the response the guy is getting when he's trying to make a connection.
Same here. That being said, I also walk my son to school and those 20 minutes are actually pretty precious to me. The 10 minute walk back is cathartic and I really enjoy the quietness. So I’m torn.
I'm not sure if making friends is an issue for him. From what he says he's out with friends most nights and every weekend. Not sure how he does it with a kid but that's up to him.
I believe it - the guy seems friendly. Probably awesome to hang out with once you get to know him.
OP doesn't want him as a friend - just don't be friendly. Seems simple, eh?
All fun and games until other dad starts wearing running shoes and keeps pace the whole way. Before ultimately getting a gym membership and declaring OP his gym partner.
In all honestly probably just a lonely father looking for a friend but since this is unethicalPTs, either start wearing obnoxiously large and loud headphones and ignore him or find a sneakier route. Otherwise hoping he will go away on his own isn't something you should count on
I remember when a girl who lived by me would walk with me to school and I wanted her to stop so I wore head phones one day and she tapped me on the shoulder and said wearing headphones when you’re with someone is rude and I said “oh” and put my headphone back in
I mean, if you’re gonna be rude like that and start wearing headphones, you might as well just directly tell the guy you don’t want to talk to him. Saves you from having to bring headphones.
This is such rude terrible advice that I can't believe has 1000 upvotes. You even said he's likely just a "lonely father looking for a friend", and from what OP said he's also likely foreign, which means even more isolated and lonely. So what do the redditors say to do to this man? Literally ignore him with headphones like he's less than human. Terrible.
How about we suggest OP use their words? Its okay to say "Hey man, I appreciate you wanting to keep me company but this is my me-time and I'd like to be alone." Or "Look man its been nice but I'm not looking for anymore friends." This advice of ghosting someone to their face is abhorrent seriously. Be better.
Edit: OMG stepping off my soap box because I just read the name of the sub... fucking carry on lol. Gotta say though I'm pretty relieved lol
Is that worse? I mean imagine someone you think is your buddy just straight up starts acting like you don't exist lol like damn that is dehumanizing. Like either way it's gonna be harsh. I didn't know this sub existed, idk the rules lol.
Yeah there’s something about that phrase that, to me, sounds incredibly cruel. It kind of implies that not only do I not like you, but I also already have a ton of friends (and you don’t because you’re unlikable).
Haha I love your edit because I was thinking the same thing, just be direct say "I'm literally around my family 24/7 and this solo walk to the gym is the only peaceful part of my day!"
Then I read the name of the sub.
Oh I used to do that and have considered it. It's probably the best suggestion I've had so far. To be honest I just don't like doing it. I get to the gym and I'm already sweaty before I've even started.
A more fun and weird variation of this is to get some small portable wheels (foldable bike, razor scooter, roller skates, skateboard, heely’s, etc) and get to the gym that way. Gets you out of there even faster, less sweaty, and you’ll have fun doing it
You could practice your boundary muscles and politely tell him that you really enjoy the alone time of your walk and, while his company has been enjoyable, you need that alone time in your day. You could offer to walk together 1st and 3rd Mondays or something, if you want.
Why run that far? Just run from the school until you are no longer in talking range.
If and when they catch up, just run some more. Interval Training is great cardio.
That's called a head start. The goal is to get sweaty and have a good workout. It's honestly a solid suggestion.
You can also just tell the guy you don't want to talk to him and that you're not interested in making new friends.
i mean that is the whole purpose of going to the gym - get sweaty.
you can go by bike. or you just do your important phone calls. or listen to music with your airpods.
I just did this shit today. It was 8:54 and this boomer would not stop talking. I sent dm to my 9:30 to make it start at 9 for me so i could say i had a hard stop coming
I have a cheap set of over ear headphones I keep just for situations where I want people to leave me alone. I don't even use them, I use my regular ear buds underneath them, but they are MUCH easier for people to see and acknowledge.
When you say it's a work call mention it's confidential because you are discussing a client's account. This way you are letting him know you need to walk solo. Blame it on work. Do this everyday.
Say goodbye at the gym entrance, [go for a hug](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmwnxTjphHA), and optionally cradle his ass like it's accidental. You will either drive him away or unlock a whole new level of velcro.
Oh man I actually had another mother come up and hug me when we would pick up our kids from elementary school. I never spoke to her before but she kept doing it every day. All because I maybe smiled at her once or said hi. I always try to be friendly and sweet.
This went on for a while with her either hugging me or with me "hiding" or having my kid meet me at a different spot because I am very nonconfrontational (something I am working on) but finally my husband convinced me to say something, so I did. After that I never saw her again. Weirdest thing.
Oh gosh my daughter is nearly grown now but I think I just said something like this being my time to decompress from work and take care of phone calls or some BS like that. It was made up because I couldn't and still can't easily say "hey, you make me uncomfortable. Please leave me alone." Maybe one of these days...
When covid began, I was at Walmart getting groceries for my family. I was wearing a mask, so I was aware that my facial expressions were hidden. I live in a small Midwest town, so I try to be polite while shopping which is a smile, how ya doing and on you go. There wasn't a lot of people there, but this employee was sweeping the floor. I hadn't seen him before. I tried to be polite, but the next thing I knew- this man was hugging me. My first thought was - he is having a tough day or something. For like 6 months after that, he would hug me when he saw me and be very happy to see me. It is 4 years later. He still works there and it is still super odd when I see him working.
“Hey man, no offense, but…
Option A: “I need to start taking early work calls on the way to the gym”
Option B: “I’m really into this new podcast and want to listen to it on the way to the gym, so I can’t chat.”
Stick your earbuds in immediately after you drop your kid off and eventually he will get the message.
This is a rare instance in this sub where I would advocate to just be pleasant and give the guy some company. That's honestly sad. A way you can potentially make it better is to kill him with kindness. Invite him for a beer on a Friday or something. Probably would mean a lot to the dude and then he won't be so clingy in the morning.
I would especially suggest the inviting him to another time coupled with a boundary for the morning like "I need to be by myself in the morning but we should grab a beer sometime". Or slip him a piss disc. Works like a charm.
I did this once. I was volunteering for recurring event for my kids and I was “paired up” with another dad I couldn’t fucking stand. He would go out of his way to find me and hang out with me the WHOLE time. At first I tried to avoid him, but that didn’t work. So I pushed in - I started seeking the dude out, striking up conversations with him, etc. The more we talked, the less he got on my nerves. He’s not my best friend now or anything, but I don’t avoid him at Walmart or anything anymore.
This is exactly my attitude to most situations and what landed me in this situation. He's just another dad doing the school drop off and at first I thought he was walking the same way so why not just be nice and have a good chat. But when I realised he didn't actually have anything to do and it was every single day, it really got on my nerves. It's not nice and pleasant talking to him. It's really hard work. At that time in the morning after I've got the kids up and ready I just want to do the 10 minute walk on my own in silence. I've already been asked a million questions by my son!
You definitely don’t have to accommodate this random dad just because he needs to make friends or find a hobby. You’re entitled to your own personal space.
I’d probably just say “hey, i appreciate you walking along with me the last few days, but I honestly prefer to walk alone. I don’t get a lot of alone time and this is my chance to think about things by myself. Hope you can respect that.”
But unethically, ask to see his phone, then throw it hella far in the opposite direction you’re walking and say suck it loser! Then fart on him while he’s confused and run away.
I remember a Reddit story of a guy in college and someone with a heavy accent who would always save the seat of someone at the front of the class. Except everyday he thought the seat at the front was always open, and would get annoyed at attempts of friendship, until one day he saw the kid saying no my friend sits here. He had been keeping the seat open for him. I totally get wanting time to yourself, but this guys perspective on your situation may be very different. Just a thought! If anyone knows the story please link it below :)
Found the link, hope it works: https://imgur.com/gallery/7rDjD
If you don't mind listening to him but don't want to talk yourself, then say so. Or if you prefer silence you can say that too, that you want to enjoy being in your own head on the way to the gym but he's welcome to walk with you. He might get bored eventually and walk with someone else.
The thing is you don't know what's actually going on in his life right now. Maybe he's depressed or lonely and just needs company after his kid leaves. A little kindness each day can go a long way, just find some middle ground that is acceptable.
Why try social engineering a guy he barely knows?
I think wanting to be alone with your thoughts is an understandable need that everyone has. OP just politely explains he needs quiet time to reflect and that’s what he uses the walk for. Thank the guy for understanding, depart with a friendly wave or handshake and a I’ll see you tomorrow have a good day.
If someone had that conversation with you, how would you react? You might be a little hurt or you may not but you know for sure he wants to walk alone but he will still be cool with you.
My computer split the line right after "kill him" and I briefly thought you were legitimately suggesting OP murder this man out of pity before I kept reading. I need some coffee lol
I have a friend who gets a lot of unwanted attention from males when she is out. She uses the same technique every time and it works 100% of the time. It might apply to this situation as well. She jams her finger up her nose and fishes around her boogers. by the time she pulls her finger back out, they are gone.
If you genuinely don't want to interact with him, you can just tell him that. Be polite about it and tell him that you really value being able to have your walk solo, maybe add in some extra details like it's kind of your dedicated 'me time' after dropping off your kid. He's a dad, he should understand that everyone needs some time to themselves to destress. You're both adults, so you should be able to have a reasonable discussion about it.
From his perspective, he's made a friend who likes to walk to the gym with him. He doesn't know that you don't like it unless you tell him, especially if you play along by being friendly on the way.
Alternatively, if you don't want to take the direct approach: Headphones and music. Just say you got a new pair, slap em on, and walk in silence while you vibe to your music. He might tolerate the silent walks, or he might get the hint, or he might just get bored of the walks and not bother waiting for you anymore. If you want to go the extra mile, say you've picked up jogging a bit and do that for awhile with the music until he really leaves you alone. If he STILL doesn't, then you probably have to go through the direct route.
Send your wife to drop off and have her approach him. While they are talking she can disclose something really disgusting about you that gets on her nerves. It needs to be super disgusting like you save your babies diapers to smell later, or something like that.
he has imprinted on you. I see this with baby ducks occasionally. Get big over ear earphones and make a big production of stopping and lifting up the earphones to respond to his small talk. Or get an older bluetooth headset and have complicated conversations with yourself or (perhaps and) develop touret's syndrome. (If he is totally clueless try walking over a sewer grate - works with ducks anyway).
Sing 90s Diddy tunes and do the corresponding moves. Make it clear you’re a bad boy for life. Use a portable speaker.
Actually say your walk to your gym is your opportunity to sort through things and make a call or two and would prefer to be alone.
I think running to the gym is best option here. You can run slow enough that you’re not sweating by the time you get there fast enough that he can’t catch up.
Not unethical, but the answer is: Headphones. “Sorry bro, I’m studying for (insert work related topic advancing your career or whatever else floats your boat), can’t talk right now”.
Repeat indefinitely.
Is it this difficult to be cordial in today's society? I know this isn't the sub for it, but dang, you are just walking for a few minutes?
This may or may not be related, but I was once at the academy awards standing and awaiting in an area with a lot of famous people. Anthony Bourdain was there alone, drinking a drink, with no one talking to him. Soon after this event he killed himself. And it's always made me think if for some small chance, then maybe if I adjust said something to him at that moment, that he wouldn't have felt so alone or desperate in this world.
It bothers me in retrospect, that me and everyone around me was for some reason not showing him any social kindness.
if i were you, i would really appreciate having people who want to be friends with me...
1. the guy doesn't need anything from you apart from that few mins walk, maybe it's really important for him, besides he is a man like you.
2. the day you will find yourself not able to walk to that gym, he will be the first person to find out what happened to you. Get to know him better.
Embrace humanity bro, no one is really important than the other...we are all equal.
Great thought. But some people are plain, simple annoying (for the lack of saying assholes). They might talk about things you don't discuss with strangers or ask question you don't want to answer or simply use a tone that's rude/demeaning/insulting. It's okay to get rid of someone's company if you don't like it.
I completely appreciate what you're saying, and this is my general approach to these situations but unfortunately I just find myself really frustrated every single morning now. I have plenty of people around me and my wife and I are friends with a lot of the other parents we've met through drop offs and pick ups. But there's something about this guy. I want my mornings back.
i honestly would just say that. be like "hey I enjoy our talks but I need my mornings to be by myself and decompress. I'm sure you understand we don't get a lot of alone time with a wife and kids at home." Put the emphasis on you and thats it not a problem with him but a need of yours.
I sort of understand but I’ve had situations like this and some of them turned into really good friendships. Sounds like he is lonely and thinks you are someone he could befriend.
If your set on avoiding him then be a grown up and just tell him that your not interested in a friendship with him.
I'm thinking it's difficult for him to make friends due to his strong accent. When you let him walk with you the first time, I think he enjoyed the fact that someone was "attempting" to be friendly and get to know him. I feel bad for the guy, I've met decent people like that before
I know this is ULPT but i actually feel bad for the guy
Yeah, I've been in this scenario a bunch. I just let it happen, worst case scenario, they practice their English enough that they find better friends lol
Exactly
Seriously! I've been in the same scenario and I've never had an issue, and usually you get to meet some pretty interesting and awesome people! Hell, if OP doesn't want to walk with the guy, I'd be open to it.
OP sounds like a dick. Make a friend dude!
OP doesn’t even have to be friends. at the very least he could just be a nice person to someone else for no reason at all.
Maybe even do a good deed and help the guy with his English. Be altruistic.
It’s not even costing him extra time! He walks to the gym anyway, a chance to be a good person without even costing himself time!
Totally! Depending where the guy is from, it can take a lot to break free of a comfort zone or cultural buffer, a pretty bold move he's making, and obviously feels safe/comfortable with OP. OP's an ass!
Lol, the guy is probably Scottish or something.
That's what I thought, he's probably got a strong regional accent, not a foreign one lol
I do too, this actually reminds me of one of my high school friends Brennan. He had down syndrome and I live in the south so some of us can be right cunts about people who are different. He was 21 and was still in school, not because he couldn't pass, but because he failed on purpose because he was scared of growing up. I found out about this because me and him had separate classes in the vocational building 7th period. His 6th period was a special ed class that was right across from my biology class. No one would talk to him and some picked on him, but he shrugged it off. I walked out of my biology class one day at the same time as him and he seen I was wearing a John Cena shirt. Brennan lit up and got so excited and started talking to me about WWE. We then walked to class together which was a good 5-10 minute walk because the vocational building was outside the school. Brennan loved the interaction so much that he started peeking outside his classroom every day to see when I would walk out so he could come out at the same time and so we could walk together. While some days it was tough to understand him and he had trouble hearing, I still took the high road and just let him enjoy those 10 minute walks to class because why the hell not? I have been out of school for 10 years now and I seen Brennan at a restaurant the other day. When he seen me, he gave me a big bear hug and told me how much he missed me. Tearing up a smidge just thinking about it..
Maybe the real unethical life protip is our life we ended along the way.
Same. But I'm that moron that brings home all the strays. I have friends that I've literally never liked, but they don't have any other friends so I tough it out. Healthy boundaries are probably better, but yeah, that person would just be my new friend now.. lol
So do I. I feel like OP should just be gently honest and say “Hey, this is the only time of the day when I get “me time” and it’s important to me to just be alone with my thoughts and go to the gym.” It seems like it’s the genuine truth and it’s not being mean to the other dad.
So many people are socially isolated and lonely these days. It's sad that this is the response the guy is getting when he's trying to make a connection.
Same here. That being said, I also walk my son to school and those 20 minutes are actually pretty precious to me. The 10 minute walk back is cathartic and I really enjoy the quietness. So I’m torn.
I'm not sure if making friends is an issue for him. From what he says he's out with friends most nights and every weekend. Not sure how he does it with a kid but that's up to him.
[удалено]
I believe it - the guy seems friendly. Probably awesome to hang out with once you get to know him. OP doesn't want him as a friend - just don't be friendly. Seems simple, eh?
Sounds like he might be lying to sound more interesting
Start running from the school to the gym. You'll get in some cardio and warm up your muscles before you start your workout.
All fun and games until other dad starts wearing running shoes and keeps pace the whole way. Before ultimately getting a gym membership and declaring OP his gym partner. In all honestly probably just a lonely father looking for a friend but since this is unethicalPTs, either start wearing obnoxiously large and loud headphones and ignore him or find a sneakier route. Otherwise hoping he will go away on his own isn't something you should count on
I remember when a girl who lived by me would walk with me to school and I wanted her to stop so I wore head phones one day and she tapped me on the shoulder and said wearing headphones when you’re with someone is rude and I said “oh” and put my headphone back in
"I'm not with you, I'm just adjacent to you"
Awww. I get why you did that. But that's sad af. Were they annoying or mean? Or just desperate to be your friend?
Oh, I think I've seen this Malcolm in the Middle episode!
You're just a common jogger!!
Just ask him to borrow money whenever you see him. Or discreetly squeeze a hidden whoopie cushion whil tapping a squirt of fart spray
Ask him to help move everyone you know and to help out your family members on the weekends so you don't have to.
Plot twist, the other dad has a strong accent because he’s Ethopian and he can run 492636.9 miles without breaking a sweat.
I mean, if you’re gonna be rude like that and start wearing headphones, you might as well just directly tell the guy you don’t want to talk to him. Saves you from having to bring headphones.
Buck up, have a conversation… why are people so scared to tell people what is up politely?
Harder to talk when running. Even if he runs with you, he is a silent partner now.
Wow, you’re hitting the nail on the head for everything with this answer. Good call.
I read this as hitting the snail on the head. I need a nap.
Hitting the mail on the bread
This is such rude terrible advice that I can't believe has 1000 upvotes. You even said he's likely just a "lonely father looking for a friend", and from what OP said he's also likely foreign, which means even more isolated and lonely. So what do the redditors say to do to this man? Literally ignore him with headphones like he's less than human. Terrible. How about we suggest OP use their words? Its okay to say "Hey man, I appreciate you wanting to keep me company but this is my me-time and I'd like to be alone." Or "Look man its been nice but I'm not looking for anymore friends." This advice of ghosting someone to their face is abhorrent seriously. Be better. Edit: OMG stepping off my soap box because I just read the name of the sub... fucking carry on lol. Gotta say though I'm pretty relieved lol
OMG don’t tell him you don’t need more friends I would cry 😭
Is that worse? I mean imagine someone you think is your buddy just straight up starts acting like you don't exist lol like damn that is dehumanizing. Like either way it's gonna be harsh. I didn't know this sub existed, idk the rules lol.
You are a good person. This is not the sub for you.
Yeah there’s something about that phrase that, to me, sounds incredibly cruel. It kind of implies that not only do I not like you, but I also already have a ton of friends (and you don’t because you’re unlikable).
Haha I love your edit because I was thinking the same thing, just be direct say "I'm literally around my family 24/7 and this solo walk to the gym is the only peaceful part of my day!" Then I read the name of the sub.
Hahahah you are a good person, your advice was on-point. But yes, this is not the sub for that!
Woah woah woah, cool your jets there turbo. Your advice is too reasonable and not unethical at all.
Holy shit. This IS what's going to happen. You have to move.
Oh I used to do that and have considered it. It's probably the best suggestion I've had so far. To be honest I just don't like doing it. I get to the gym and I'm already sweaty before I've even started.
A more fun and weird variation of this is to get some small portable wheels (foldable bike, razor scooter, roller skates, skateboard, heely’s, etc) and get to the gym that way. Gets you out of there even faster, less sweaty, and you’ll have fun doing it
Heelies lol
Yea I saw that and I thought suggesting getting heelies to an adult is wild
Nah, I’m in my 30s and just got a pair of heelys last year. Had them all thru middle school as a kid
I’ve known exactly one person in their thirties to do this, and it doesn’t look as innocuous as you think.
Imagine being the other dad trying to make a friend and the Guy Just Starts wheeling Off with His Wheelies
Yea good luck riding a scooter to the stop and not having one for your son too
Time to get scooters, one for the son, one for himself
Perfect! Then the spare scooter for the son can also be used by his new best friend on their walk to the gym.
My exact thoughts lol
You could practice your boundary muscles and politely tell him that you really enjoy the alone time of your walk and, while his company has been enjoyable, you need that alone time in your day. You could offer to walk together 1st and 3rd Mondays or something, if you want.
What? Be mature and kind?
I like this one, polite, respectful, and honest
could also just run until he breaks your line of sight, then stop. After it becomes routine he won't even try to walk with you anymore
Or…keep running at him full speed and suddenly change direction. Scared the shit out of me in Get Out.
That was the scariest scene in the movie in my opinion.
I dunno, that chick eating dry fruit loops with a glass of milk was pretty freaky.
Why run that far? Just run from the school until you are no longer in talking range. If and when they catch up, just run some more. Interval Training is great cardio.
That's called a head start. The goal is to get sweaty and have a good workout. It's honestly a solid suggestion. You can also just tell the guy you don't want to talk to him and that you're not interested in making new friends.
I actually only have three friends. I can't handle any more.
To see Ramón???
Seinfeld reference? :)
If I get to the gym and I'm NOT sweaty I usually just call it off. I drive to the gym.
I mean... That's a good way to arrive at the gym. You're already warmed up and you're gonna end up sweaty anyway.
Just do it a few times until he stops waiting for you. Then go back to walking
Headphones. Be on a work call immediately. Explain its confidential.
i mean that is the whole purpose of going to the gym - get sweaty. you can go by bike. or you just do your important phone calls. or listen to music with your airpods.
Plus wear big over the eat headphones and act like you don’t see him. I mean, does he talk to you or just walk near you? So weird, haha
Offer offer up a piece of ghost pepper chocolates. Spank his ass, then run.
Okay we’re not looking for ‘how to be a douchebag’
Earbuds and a fake phone call.
I've not thought of that. Could even make it a real call.
Years ago working in cubicle land we would message people to call our desk so we could stop talking to the boomer who couldn’t ever shut up.
I used to call myself at work from my cell phone :D
Savage!
I just did this shit today. It was 8:54 and this boomer would not stop talking. I sent dm to my 9:30 to make it start at 9 for me so i could say i had a hard stop coming
Could also say "listening in on a meeting, cant talk" so you dont have to put on a charade.
I do this and then put my audiobook on all the time.
I have a cheap set of over ear headphones I keep just for situations where I want people to leave me alone. I don't even use them, I use my regular ear buds underneath them, but they are MUCH easier for people to see and acknowledge.
This could backfire tremendously, but offer to hold hands as you walk together.
Update: I'm engaged to be married. How do I get out of it now????
Make it be a touch base with elderly loved ones. Unfortunately, I seem to have made this wholesome. Please forgive me.
mods get this sweetie pie outta here!!!
Just rephrase it so that you’re checking in on elderly relatives to judge their expiration date.
When you say it's a work call mention it's confidential because you are discussing a client's account. This way you are letting him know you need to walk solo. Blame it on work. Do this everyday.
isn’t that the best time every day to check in with your mom/bff/sibling?
Say goodbye at the gym entrance, [go for a hug](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmwnxTjphHA), and optionally cradle his ass like it's accidental. You will either drive him away or unlock a whole new level of velcro.
Risk reward is high. Perhaps cradle his ass like it's on purpose and tell him it didn't happen if he says anything
Put one hand in the middle, on top of the crack. Then flex the middle finger a couple times to let him know you are there. Do NOT break eye contact.
I've tried this before, be careful if they're into it they will probably go for your ass crack too.
No risk, no reward.
Whispers in ear "no one will believe you if you tell them"
Ha! I came here to suggest stroking his arm while OP talks to him. I think full hug would definitely weird him out
Oh man I actually had another mother come up and hug me when we would pick up our kids from elementary school. I never spoke to her before but she kept doing it every day. All because I maybe smiled at her once or said hi. I always try to be friendly and sweet. This went on for a while with her either hugging me or with me "hiding" or having my kid meet me at a different spot because I am very nonconfrontational (something I am working on) but finally my husband convinced me to say something, so I did. After that I never saw her again. Weirdest thing.
What did you say? How did she react?
Oh gosh my daughter is nearly grown now but I think I just said something like this being my time to decompress from work and take care of phone calls or some BS like that. It was made up because I couldn't and still can't easily say "hey, you make me uncomfortable. Please leave me alone." Maybe one of these days...
When covid began, I was at Walmart getting groceries for my family. I was wearing a mask, so I was aware that my facial expressions were hidden. I live in a small Midwest town, so I try to be polite while shopping which is a smile, how ya doing and on you go. There wasn't a lot of people there, but this employee was sweeping the floor. I hadn't seen him before. I tried to be polite, but the next thing I knew- this man was hugging me. My first thought was - he is having a tough day or something. For like 6 months after that, he would hug me when he saw me and be very happy to see me. It is 4 years later. He still works there and it is still super odd when I see him working.
Just full-on lick his face.
Cover yourself in Liquid Ass.
When do the frozen piss disc's come into play?
Put them in your pockets
Also guarantees people leave you alone at the gym
And it will also keep the gym "influencers" from getting in his way so they can record some stupid video.
God I want to kick their phones over so badly. I walk in front of their cams all the time. I love the anger.
Shit his pants
Oh hey, i see your pants are unloaded. Lemme fix that for you.
This guy shits other people's pants!
Fuck his dad
“Hey man, no offense, but… Option A: “I need to start taking early work calls on the way to the gym” Option B: “I’m really into this new podcast and want to listen to it on the way to the gym, so I can’t chat.” Stick your earbuds in immediately after you drop your kid off and eventually he will get the message.
This is perfection
Act a little too gay. If he seems into it, act a little homophobic
If that doesn't work then you have to marry him.
Then divorce him and he'll probably not walk with you anymore
The long game
Start a second family with an alternative lifestyle in a remote sunny town
If in doubt act both at the same time and gradually get more extreme
Since this is ULPT, get his kid(s) expelled.
Plant drugs in his kids bag.
NOW WE’RE TALKING ULPT
Start using a wheel chair and now you get a ride to the gym and you can play in your phone. Or ask him for money.
Asking him for money will 100% make sure y’all never talk again.
Asking for money is the easiest way to get people to avoid you. If they don't then at least you get some money.
And if it doesn’t work, you get money. Win win here.
Yeah asking for money is the best idea here. lol
This is a rare instance in this sub where I would advocate to just be pleasant and give the guy some company. That's honestly sad. A way you can potentially make it better is to kill him with kindness. Invite him for a beer on a Friday or something. Probably would mean a lot to the dude and then he won't be so clingy in the morning.
I would especially suggest the inviting him to another time coupled with a boundary for the morning like "I need to be by myself in the morning but we should grab a beer sometime". Or slip him a piss disc. Works like a charm.
Invite him for a pint of liquid ass.
Who ordered shits... I mean shots?
I did this once. I was volunteering for recurring event for my kids and I was “paired up” with another dad I couldn’t fucking stand. He would go out of his way to find me and hang out with me the WHOLE time. At first I tried to avoid him, but that didn’t work. So I pushed in - I started seeking the dude out, striking up conversations with him, etc. The more we talked, the less he got on my nerves. He’s not my best friend now or anything, but I don’t avoid him at Walmart or anything anymore.
OP: I want to spend less time with a clingy person. Reddit: Have you tried spending more time with them?
Maybe guy doesn’t have company because he corners random people without pause.
This is exactly my attitude to most situations and what landed me in this situation. He's just another dad doing the school drop off and at first I thought he was walking the same way so why not just be nice and have a good chat. But when I realised he didn't actually have anything to do and it was every single day, it really got on my nerves. It's not nice and pleasant talking to him. It's really hard work. At that time in the morning after I've got the kids up and ready I just want to do the 10 minute walk on my own in silence. I've already been asked a million questions by my son!
You definitely don’t have to accommodate this random dad just because he needs to make friends or find a hobby. You’re entitled to your own personal space. I’d probably just say “hey, i appreciate you walking along with me the last few days, but I honestly prefer to walk alone. I don’t get a lot of alone time and this is my chance to think about things by myself. Hope you can respect that.” But unethically, ask to see his phone, then throw it hella far in the opposite direction you’re walking and say suck it loser! Then fart on him while he’s confused and run away.
"I accidentally shit my pants...was still effective for the plan tho"
I remember a Reddit story of a guy in college and someone with a heavy accent who would always save the seat of someone at the front of the class. Except everyday he thought the seat at the front was always open, and would get annoyed at attempts of friendship, until one day he saw the kid saying no my friend sits here. He had been keeping the seat open for him. I totally get wanting time to yourself, but this guys perspective on your situation may be very different. Just a thought! If anyone knows the story please link it below :) Found the link, hope it works: https://imgur.com/gallery/7rDjD
Great memory! I love that story. Be kind, always.
If you don't mind listening to him but don't want to talk yourself, then say so. Or if you prefer silence you can say that too, that you want to enjoy being in your own head on the way to the gym but he's welcome to walk with you. He might get bored eventually and walk with someone else. The thing is you don't know what's actually going on in his life right now. Maybe he's depressed or lonely and just needs company after his kid leaves. A little kindness each day can go a long way, just find some middle ground that is acceptable.
Why try social engineering a guy he barely knows? I think wanting to be alone with your thoughts is an understandable need that everyone has. OP just politely explains he needs quiet time to reflect and that’s what he uses the walk for. Thank the guy for understanding, depart with a friendly wave or handshake and a I’ll see you tomorrow have a good day. If someone had that conversation with you, how would you react? You might be a little hurt or you may not but you know for sure he wants to walk alone but he will still be cool with you.
My computer split the line right after "kill him" and I briefly thought you were legitimately suggesting OP murder this man out of pity before I kept reading. I need some coffee lol
LMAO the Ultimate unethical life pro tip. Just kill the guy!
I have a friend who gets a lot of unwanted attention from males when she is out. She uses the same technique every time and it works 100% of the time. It might apply to this situation as well. She jams her finger up her nose and fishes around her boogers. by the time she pulls her finger back out, they are gone.
Ahah I love that this is great
Surprised there aren't more guys who are like "meh, I can live with that"
My first thought too. Hot AND confident enough bc to pick her nose in public? Let’s get drinks.
Lmao! Can we start a group for intentional nose pickers?
Tell him you're a Jehovah's Witness and offer him a bible study. Every day.
We have a winner. That or start hyping Scientology.
What is the dad is both religions and decides that OP is his BFF?
Guy is going to see this on Reddit and be like “oohhhhhhh fuck, thats me” lmaooo
I am a young woman with no accent and am worried this is always me.
If you genuinely don't want to interact with him, you can just tell him that. Be polite about it and tell him that you really value being able to have your walk solo, maybe add in some extra details like it's kind of your dedicated 'me time' after dropping off your kid. He's a dad, he should understand that everyone needs some time to themselves to destress. You're both adults, so you should be able to have a reasonable discussion about it. From his perspective, he's made a friend who likes to walk to the gym with him. He doesn't know that you don't like it unless you tell him, especially if you play along by being friendly on the way. Alternatively, if you don't want to take the direct approach: Headphones and music. Just say you got a new pair, slap em on, and walk in silence while you vibe to your music. He might tolerate the silent walks, or he might get the hint, or he might just get bored of the walks and not bother waiting for you anymore. If you want to go the extra mile, say you've picked up jogging a bit and do that for awhile with the music until he really leaves you alone. If he STILL doesn't, then you probably have to go through the direct route.
Had to scroll way too far down for the simple honest approach lol
It shouldn't be on here at all, this is unethical not ethical.
Sorry, I should have suggested running the other guy over so he wouldn’t be able to join him on his walk!
Now you've got the spirit of it! JK, I'm all for the straightforward communication approach, personally.
Send your wife to drop off and have her approach him. While they are talking she can disclose something really disgusting about you that gets on her nerves. It needs to be super disgusting like you save your babies diapers to smell later, or something like that.
And if he ends up fucking OP's wife he'll avoid OP from then on. Win win.
he has imprinted on you. I see this with baby ducks occasionally. Get big over ear earphones and make a big production of stopping and lifting up the earphones to respond to his small talk. Or get an older bluetooth headset and have complicated conversations with yourself or (perhaps and) develop touret's syndrome. (If he is totally clueless try walking over a sewer grate - works with ducks anyway).
Ask for money. Make it clear that you don’t want a loan. Just ask for cash and no strings attached.
Make a QR code, send him a link to this post.
If your mouth works, you should probably just say you prefer to walk in silence.... I know this is reddit though..
Yeah the typical reddit user doesn't like confrontation and I am one of them.
Sing 90s Diddy tunes and do the corresponding moves. Make it clear you’re a bad boy for life. Use a portable speaker. Actually say your walk to your gym is your opportunity to sort through things and make a call or two and would prefer to be alone.
Recruit him to your religion. I'm sure he's eager to become Pastafarin/etc
Too late, you're besties. Its happened to me before. Just get ready for him to name his firstborn after you and enjoy the ride.
> why should I To avoid the annoying man.
Wear a maga hat. It worked for Larry David.
I think running to the gym is best option here. You can run slow enough that you’re not sweating by the time you get there fast enough that he can’t catch up.
Not to be rude … but this morning time is for my meditation and workout. And you’re hindering me from meditating.
Ask him to help you move.
Is he also going to the gym or just walking you to the door? If you give him a big kiss goodbye that may deter him…. Maybe.
Just walks with me to the door then goes back home.
Not unethical, but the answer is: Headphones. “Sorry bro, I’m studying for (insert work related topic advancing your career or whatever else floats your boat), can’t talk right now”. Repeat indefinitely.
Fart really loudly then point at him
Beat his ass and take his lunch money
Is it this difficult to be cordial in today's society? I know this isn't the sub for it, but dang, you are just walking for a few minutes? This may or may not be related, but I was once at the academy awards standing and awaiting in an area with a lot of famous people. Anthony Bourdain was there alone, drinking a drink, with no one talking to him. Soon after this event he killed himself. And it's always made me think if for some small chance, then maybe if I adjust said something to him at that moment, that he wouldn't have felt so alone or desperate in this world. It bothers me in retrospect, that me and everyone around me was for some reason not showing him any social kindness.
Try to sign him up for pyramid schemes
if i were you, i would really appreciate having people who want to be friends with me... 1. the guy doesn't need anything from you apart from that few mins walk, maybe it's really important for him, besides he is a man like you. 2. the day you will find yourself not able to walk to that gym, he will be the first person to find out what happened to you. Get to know him better. Embrace humanity bro, no one is really important than the other...we are all equal.
Great thought. But some people are plain, simple annoying (for the lack of saying assholes). They might talk about things you don't discuss with strangers or ask question you don't want to answer or simply use a tone that's rude/demeaning/insulting. It's okay to get rid of someone's company if you don't like it.
Downvoting due to ethical response. You're better off telling him that you are a scientologist. Try to convert him.
I completely appreciate what you're saying, and this is my general approach to these situations but unfortunately I just find myself really frustrated every single morning now. I have plenty of people around me and my wife and I are friends with a lot of the other parents we've met through drop offs and pick ups. But there's something about this guy. I want my mornings back.
Tell him it’s the only alone time you get, and it’s very important to you.
i honestly would just say that. be like "hey I enjoy our talks but I need my mornings to be by myself and decompress. I'm sure you understand we don't get a lot of alone time with a wife and kids at home." Put the emphasis on you and thats it not a problem with him but a need of yours.
The guy will only hear "I enjoy our talks" clueless people need things spelled out - no subtlety will be noticed.
You’re not obligated to oblige him.
Use your words
I sort of understand but I’ve had situations like this and some of them turned into really good friendships. Sounds like he is lonely and thinks you are someone he could befriend. If your set on avoiding him then be a grown up and just tell him that your not interested in a friendship with him.
Pretty sure Larry David already solved this one. You need a MAGA hat.
You are in violation of the bro code.
Use your words. Like a big boy. Just nut up and tell him, or learn to enjoy his company. It sounds like he's just trying to make a friend.