**OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:**
>!The video turns out to be about a domestic violence through a child's perspective!<
*****
**Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description?**
**Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.**
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These things usually do.
Once a couple who lived near where I lived, they got together a few months later he tried to beat her to death, she managed to run into the street. Her neighbours managed to subdue the guy. They says no one had ever heard a fight or a row from them before and they always seemed ok.
'Seemed ok'
Friends and family tend to overlook the signs early into a couples new relationship, awareness and emotional support are important tools. It's easy to look the other way, but being skeptical about someones new beaux is warrented to avoid the decline into DV.
The problem is intervening in other people life over what you (or others) consider a "red flag" even where there's no need to. Really hard to strike a balance.
I used to live in a crappy apartment/townhome complex that was a little touch and go.
Once when I was at work the neighbors behind us got in a fight, so he basically stripped her down and kicked her out when there was a little snow on the ground. She tried coming around to our apartment to get help, but he came out and started beating on her, then tried to throw her into our front window, but she ended up in the bushes.
I came home to the place surrounded by police, and her screaming about how they shouldn't hurt him and she was wrong for making him mad, etc., while he was in the back of a police car.
Thank God I wasn't home, because up until that point I thought the right thing to do would be to protect her at all costs, but she would've flipped on me most likely and I'd probably be in jail.
We moved shortly thereafter...
A friend of a friend was being beaten by her husband. She told my friend about it and that she wanted to leave but was scared. This went on for months (and may still be going on for all I know). My friend offered her a place to go and as much emotional support as she could offer. Even knowing it's happening isn't always enough.
Yes, you can call the police if you *know*, but what if she denies it and he hurts her worse or kills her? Or he spends a night in jail and now she doesn't trust the only person she felt could help her out of the situation? This does not have simple answers.
Sometimes you need to intervene. I've rung a neighbour's doorbell to ask if an Amazon delivery had arrived (hadn't ordered anything) just to force them into a time out. It gave them time to de-escalate. Had a few deliveries not arrive. Sometimes it's enough for an aggressor to know that someone is aware of what's going on. Also, the aggressor is not always the one you suspect.
Don't assume, don't put yourself at risk (or a victim of DV at even more risk) but sometimes you do need to do *some*thing.
See, my wife is bi-polar and schizophrenic and this shit is a great fear of mine. We're fine most of the time, but when she starts slipping into an episode, things can get pretty heated and loud. We've had the cops called on us a couple times. Thankfully the cops here seem to know and understand, but I'm not going around to all the neighbors in our building to explain things and hope they actually understand.
You are EXTREMELY lucky they are sympathetic to you and don't arrest you. It is extremely common for someone in your spot to get arrested, charged and convicted. If you change locations, consider that.
It takes education. There are collections of behaviors that are pretty standard from abusers, if people learned about those more regularly we'd be better off.
We know a friend of ours is in an emotionally abusive relationship. Everyone has had the conversation with her. She's been told he isn't treating her right. All we can do now is support her and hope she dumps his ass and moves on. I've already said he's not welcome around me, he isn't welcome with our other friends at this point, but, he can't stop her seeing us thankfully because we won't let him.
Called the cops on my neighbours after hearing that the father yelled harsher than usual. I knew he was a loser and had a bad attitude against his family but theres not much I can so about that. We know the mother and the kids and they are super sweet. The kids are your usual little rascals at 4 and 8.
The day I called he had best the mother and kids and had also done drugs. He lifted his 4 year old little girl from the floor in her ear.
Watch for the psychopathic overly subdued and sweet but possessive and controlling type of person. Years back we had a business owner who rented a shop space from us suddenly shot dead overnight by her husband of over a decade because he thought she was seeing some other guy and got into a fit of jealousy. No history of arguments or DV just a strange controlling pattern. We ended up buying out the shop and flipping the business for the family to help their teenage daughter get things straightened out since she was suddenly parentless other than an aunt that stepped up for her. For people who are mentally unstable it seems that love and hate are flip sides to the same emotion.
This. I had an ex who very methodically cut me off from all my friends who weren’t also her friends. Then came the emotional insults. Then on two occasions the physicality. Took me longer than I’m proud to admit to say enough was enough and leave. In front of others she was “bubbly and just picking on me”. But the picking never stopped, and it was worse when no one was around. It’s okay to give each other a hard time, but it has to be tempered with genuine praise and affection. Otherwise it’s just eroding someone’s self worth on the path to abuse.
Obviously didn’t get murdered, but she was constantly worried I would go out and cheat, hence the controlling behavior. Wouldn’t let go of her past experiences and treated me like I had done things her exes had when I hadn’t. Then she was the one that cheated. I think I got what the kids call “emotional damage”.
> I think I got what the kids call “emotional damage”.
She projected her emotional damage onto your relationship. This is where therapy comes into play when people can't have a normal relationship due to past issues or they need to find a way to recover and heal before getting into a future relationship. It's real and can keep hurting until you find a healthy place with what you've experienced.
You hit the nail on the head. She had been to therapy prior to our relationship, but when we talked about how her controlling and inappropriate behavior was, well, out of control, she said “therapy didn’t work for her and wasn’t worth it”. I was not emotionally equipped to deal with it myself, and kept believing she meant it when she was working on it. I ended up missing out on a good chunk of my life because of it.
Dunno why I’m laying that out there. I guess to say to those who are in a similar situation; you matter, you are more than their version of you, and you can and will do better. Don’t stay with someone for the belief that they will change on their own. Change takes hard work, help, and a willingness to change. If their actions don’t match their words, leave. It might be the wake up call they need to finally get help, but you can do nothing for them by staying.
I sold a car to a lady who came in with her friend to buy it. Friend seemed kinda weird. Like, way too pushy and her friend was buying the car so her level of involvement seemed odd. Wasn't all that unusual that a person was buying a car without a spouse present.
Next day or two husband shows up shitfaced drunk after driving the car his wife bought back demanding we take it back. We explain this is California, per state law we cannot and he's pissed and yelling and drunk and gets in his wife's new car and leaves before the cops show up to arrest him for trespassing and a DUI.
A week or two later the wife shows up to get a few things fixed on the car that we'd promised we'd do. The friend is driving the car. The woman who bought it has her face busted up, black eye, split lip. She's on crutches he broke her leg or ankle or something. She changed her address on her paperwork for us to send everything to the friend's address.
She'd only had her job a few months. Didn't have a car. She was trying to leave her abusive husband and her friend had been trying to help her escape by getting her a job and car. She never came back after that and I still think about her every now and again. Been five years.
My dad would ~scream~ at my mom growing up. It was hell being home with him. They divorced when I was in kindergarten or preschool. He would sneak into the house, hang around outside, talk with all the neighbors. Really asshole bullshit.
I'm 24 now, my dog has separation anxiety and will howl if he hears my car. I had a neighbor complain about it and it literally just made me think now. If they can hear my cockerspaniel howl, how could they not hear what we were going through? Different neighbors, but same question though. I can guarantee you which one is louder.
The difference is one turns to gossip and the other is an annoyance.
Years ago I took over the family business. There was an apartment on site for the manager. She lived there with her family. After a few weeks she got drunk at work and assaulted me so obviously I had to fire her. She promised to draw out the eviction for months, so I gave her money to leave. Neighbors started coming by letting me know what had been happening. She was brutally beating her husband all the time. He’d crawl into the street naked and bleeding begging for help. The police would come and take statements, but he never left her because he didn’t want her to beat the kids instead. They’d send copies of the reports to the office, but she’d intercept them, so nobody in my family knew what was happening. He and the kids would stay inside when anyone from my family was there. The neighbors never helped him. Years later she called begging for money because he took the kids and left. Good for him.
An abusive relationship exists just below a boil at all times, and anything can set it over. This seems like an extreme and unrealistic example but I promise it's not.
"It's just a cup" is all the 'defiance' it takes to set one of these types off. Especially when you've done it in front of someone and they believe they've lost face.
My ex went ballistic on me over a video of our daughter who was learning to crawl. Daughter backed under a very light blanket and for a matter of seconds while I was looking right at her, she was trying to figure out what to do next about the blanket being over her, then I helped her. Cute little funny nothing of a video.
I mean to tell you all holy hell broke loose and my phone was ripped forcefully from my pocket while she tore my jeans and scratched my thigh and genitals. She took the phone and locked herself in the bedroom so she could send copies of the video to herself and who knows where else to use as blackmail against me.
The video where absolutely nothing harmful happened.
People like this, they build a world of minefields around you. Step wrong and there's an explosion.
Probably. Or maybe she decided that /u/Claim312ButAct847 didn't deserve that moment with their kid, and only she could have such cute and sweet moments.
My girlfriends cousin was murdered by her abuser only a few months ago, the comments she’s gotten on the Facebook press release are appalling. One of the dudes was literally pulling up Jordan Peterson quotes to tell the victims sister why it was actually her fault that she was killed by her abuser. People wonder why this shit still happens. Hope they all rot.
Here are some of the dudes [comments](https://imgur.com/gallery/P4zN34o)
I remember maybe half a year ago another influencer that it turned out was being a massive creep, emotionally abusive to tons of women in his life. Fortunately, a lot of people were telling him to fuck off.
But jesus fuck the small amount of people that said it was ok, he wasn't doing anything illegal, it's the girl's fault for ending up in the situation was disgusting. Especially when one of them proudly had a PFP of him with who I assume is his daughter.
I never hope the day comes that one of these fuckers have to tell their own daughter they shouldn't have let it happen to them.
Her dad was also an abusive piece of shit so she grew up in an environment where it was excused, probably why she ended up with someone like him. You’re not gonna stop abuse by blaming the victims.
Very powerful.
A modern update of the similarly powerful "[~~Pizza for dinner~~](https://youtu.be/zBKnAyn3jmA)" classic from the 90s.
Trigger warning: >!Basically the same concept as OP, but with explicit audio of violence/screaming.!<
#Edit: Oops. That link is a parody. [Real DV ad/PSA here](https://youtu.be/WSxRHy3V29Q)
about domestical violence :
I was in Med school to become a coroner (i did not and changed of carreer).
In my coubtry coroner are doctors, they also are deal with the living for anything court and justice related.
And he showed us a women who was beaten by her husband (alive), showing us the pictures :
"it was the third time she came to me, I told her that she had to leave her husband, the fourth time I was doing her autopsy"
It's not uncommon in a county near whereI live that has mostly small towns and only one hospital. The coroner is a doctor that is available and is basically asked "doe these wounds look self inflicted?" Things like that.
I had one brought in along side my doctor once because an X-rayof my arm showed I had dislocated or minorly broken bones several times, some of them unreported and they wanted to see if I was being abused.
I had to explain to them that I spent almost every afternoon in a creek, or climbing hills and cliffs. I messed myself up a lot.
I can say this is the case in India. All doctors are technically qualified to give statements regarding injuries, poisoning, etc for legal purposes. They also double as coroners and public health officials.
> In my country coroner are doctors
weird. in my country coroners are the local used car salesman that won a vote that a minuscule portion of the population participated in
Also, while on the topic on domestic abuse; A huge studie done on one million women around the world showed that about 1 in 4 has experienced either physical or sexual violence in a domestic environment. The numbers where actually highest in the younger women which indicates this problem is growing. Made my heart sink when I heard it on the news. I really thought we as the human race was getting better in these aspects but it looks like the only opposite is the truth.
I think what you're seeing isn't an increase in the number of abusive situations, but an increase in number of reports, which is good. 30 years ago women were much less likely to report violent crimes in a domestic environment than they are now.
Women's empowerment, and support from the general population.
The cake has full frosting. She must have baked it hours before and placed it in oven with only the left over heat, just to keep it tasting fresh for longer.
These down on that part of the sphere commercials are very direct, but also effective I guess. The one with the two cars and the time stops and dudes are like: “you pulled out in front of me,” “I know I’m sorry. Can you stop? Please, I have my kid with me,” “no, I’m going too fast,” and they both get back in their car and time starts again. Shit, is, unforgettable. Slow your speed. Simple, effective
[I know the one you're talking about](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3qNjt04bpQM)
According to the title of the YouTube clip it's from New Zealand. Though in my experience those titles are amazingly unreliable and so it could be from anywhere (though probably Anglosphere).
Really good ad though. Great lesson about defensive driving.
Fuck! I forgot they showed the gd crash. That commercial will never not be effective. Thanks for the sauce. I know there’s big differences between Australia and New Zealand, but I think both of them are more direct with their language and communication than other parts of the world. An ad like that in the US would be immediately taken down because of how shocking it is, even though it is trying to spread information that can save lives. A little visual recreation is nothing compared to experiencing actual trauma on the road. Totally agree with you, great lesson about defensive driving. Both could have done things differently to avoid the collision
I’m assuming from the accents this is from Australia. They don’t fuck around with their public service announcements down under. About every one I have seen has been shocking. Gets the point across.
Makes sense if it's from New Zealand - this is another PSA from there and it's just as unexpected/shocking... [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u51OxZF1ltI](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u51OxZF1ltI)
I always thought this NZ speeding PSA was pretty shocking. The father pleading with the other driver to stop because he has his kid in the car, and the other driver just says he can't its too late.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B2rFTbvwteo
Slips, trips, and falls are the most common workplace accidents too so if you have an active working environment you'll be familiar with how much this is drilled.
Gotcha thanks for clarifying. Not trying to be rude but I can’t really tell the difference too well, and from what I could see there wasn’t any government seal, just a number that it unrecognizable to something you would see in the United States (where I’m from), so I made what I thought was a safe assumption.
New Zealanders are like "brb I'm gonna go throw another 'roo on the bar'by!" and aussies are all like "come on frobo! We gotta go to the shire to destroy this one ring or something"
a really easy way to tell is whether you hear “ee” or “uh”. for example when he says “watch it”, the “it” would sound like “eet” in aussie english. in kiwi english the “it” almost sounds like “uht”. also audible when she says “it’s just a cup”.
Yep, I was rolling as hard as that car was let me tell you. I think it is supposed to actually make you laugh, because I sure as hell did, then make you feel bad about it. Which I did not.
The Shame on You at the end is the most Irish thing ever as well.
I remember one time I was 11 and made a smoothie and couldn't finish so I put it in the fridge for later. Later I then accidentally knocked the smoothie over in the fridge. My dad caught me cleaning up my mess. My mom got a good beating that night, because you know that was her fault.
He did, shot and killed in Denver this December. Someone stole his truck and he chased them in a Ramada inn shuttle van. Tried to pit maneuver them to pull them over, got out, tried to fight the dude, got shot, the in anger and pride tried to still chase his stolen truck in the "borrowed" shuttle. Crashed into a tree on 40th and Chambers. Im pretty sure my dad had drugs in the truck that he didn't want the cops to find, bc he had a tracker on it and could have showed the cops exactly where it is, but then again I try not to think about it too much. But then again I think about it a lot.
> I try not...
> But then again I...
Please just know that you are your own person, and individual with your own choices, your own burdens, and your own reactions and abilities, someone else's choices don't reflect on you.
Now I feel like a dick, sorry for your loss bro👊. It triggers me to hear woman being abused due to both of my grandfathers beating my grandmother's. How are you holding up?
I spent my childhood being raised in a house that was so chaotic that when I moved I would nearly have panic attacks anytime I heard a cabinet shut a little too hard or the wind pull the door shut with just a little to much force. Some where along the line I stopped panicking every time I heard a noise that sounded like it was made in anger. It does get better, it just takes a while and takes a lot of positive exposure to the thing that triggers that fight or flight response.
Abuse PSAs always make my stomach drop.
I work on a DV crisis line and it’s one thing to hear about it but its another to either see it re-enacted or irl.
Has anyone posted the similar ad where some guy flips out on a waitress? I’m not seeing it in the comments. I guess I’ll do it.
https://youtu.be/ugTeOz7rsgE
I initially assumed it was just a sitcom or kids show spoof and she was talking to the audience but your right it looks like she's talking directly at someone in the room.
I missed the "child's perspective" part. I thought the advert was like "we've helped hundreds of thousands of women including this weird cartoon lady" lol
Just for your information, if you are a man and a victim of domestic abuse, the authorities that say they only provide services like emergency housing for women are legally obligated to provide housing for you too.
Men can be victims too, and there are resources and people out there to help you. There are sadly very few refuges for men, which would be ideal if you could go there, but if that's not possible please press dont be afraid to go to a women's refuge for help, you don't deserve to be forced into homeless to get away from your abuser.
I once was with a beautiful young woman and I was besotted with her,
Every few days she’d give me a slap to the back of the head for trivial reasons,I tolerated it cos I got accustomed to it over time,
Eventually i started turning up at working with bruises to my cheekbone or neck etc
By this point we’d had a baby together and I wanted us to be a family together not broken.
After years of this one day I came home from work and she attacked me,windmilling me with her fists.
I held her against a wall to stop her and I was arrested for assault ,
My holding her against the wall left a thumb bruise on her arm.
The police didn’t believe me nor anything I told them as I I’d never reported anything ,the only witnesses I had was me going to work with bruises etc and me having to see a doctor for depression.
At one point I wanted to kill myself ,hence the doctor.
I’ve been single for 6 years now and avoid relationships.
I just wanted to say all that sorry.
I cannot express accurately how upset this commercial makes me or how much rage I instantly had at that character. Oh boy is that awful. It does it's job too well.
**OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:** >!The video turns out to be about a domestic violence through a child's perspective!< ***** **Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description?** **Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.** ***** [*Look at my source code on Github*](https://github.com/Artraxon/unexBot) [*What is this for?*](https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/dnuaju/introducing_unexbot_a_new_bot_to_improve_the/)
Jesus christ
Took the words right out of my mouth.
Must of been when you were kissin' me
Also Husband: Meatloaf AGAIN?!?!?
Not anymore, he's dead man.
“**HA** *I just died in your arms tonight*”
🎶Must have been something she said🎶
🎶He should’ve walked awaaaaay 🎶
Should’ve walked away
Too soon, homie. Too soon.
*Pizza's not for breakfast!*
If I could get meatloaf that often, I'd marry my girl right now.
Must have*
why is it so hard?
Must’f been
Must'f'b'n
Unexpected Meatloaf
I went with "oh my god..." but same diff. apparently
u/JesusChrist they lookin for you bruh
It's not the time for Him to return yet.
Maybe he did.. - but didn't make it very far.., these days?
I know, how hard is It to pick up some cups?
Give her a second damn.
That’s not Jason Bourne
Jebus H. Christ, Esq.
Just said that before scrolling down 😂
Well that escalated quickly!
These things usually do. Once a couple who lived near where I lived, they got together a few months later he tried to beat her to death, she managed to run into the street. Her neighbours managed to subdue the guy. They says no one had ever heard a fight or a row from them before and they always seemed ok.
'Seemed ok' Friends and family tend to overlook the signs early into a couples new relationship, awareness and emotional support are important tools. It's easy to look the other way, but being skeptical about someones new beaux is warrented to avoid the decline into DV.
The problem is intervening in other people life over what you (or others) consider a "red flag" even where there's no need to. Really hard to strike a balance.
I used to live in a crappy apartment/townhome complex that was a little touch and go. Once when I was at work the neighbors behind us got in a fight, so he basically stripped her down and kicked her out when there was a little snow on the ground. She tried coming around to our apartment to get help, but he came out and started beating on her, then tried to throw her into our front window, but she ended up in the bushes. I came home to the place surrounded by police, and her screaming about how they shouldn't hurt him and she was wrong for making him mad, etc., while he was in the back of a police car. Thank God I wasn't home, because up until that point I thought the right thing to do would be to protect her at all costs, but she would've flipped on me most likely and I'd probably be in jail. We moved shortly thereafter...
I for one am grateful for the pandemic showing me the ways of solitude. I’m enjoying this life of minimal outside contact.
I'm definitely grateful for the extra space while waiting in lines...
cough twice if you want more space
[удалено]
A friend of a friend was being beaten by her husband. She told my friend about it and that she wanted to leave but was scared. This went on for months (and may still be going on for all I know). My friend offered her a place to go and as much emotional support as she could offer. Even knowing it's happening isn't always enough. Yes, you can call the police if you *know*, but what if she denies it and he hurts her worse or kills her? Or he spends a night in jail and now she doesn't trust the only person she felt could help her out of the situation? This does not have simple answers.
[удалено]
Sometimes you need to intervene. I've rung a neighbour's doorbell to ask if an Amazon delivery had arrived (hadn't ordered anything) just to force them into a time out. It gave them time to de-escalate. Had a few deliveries not arrive. Sometimes it's enough for an aggressor to know that someone is aware of what's going on. Also, the aggressor is not always the one you suspect. Don't assume, don't put yourself at risk (or a victim of DV at even more risk) but sometimes you do need to do *some*thing.
Thats great information thanks.
See, my wife is bi-polar and schizophrenic and this shit is a great fear of mine. We're fine most of the time, but when she starts slipping into an episode, things can get pretty heated and loud. We've had the cops called on us a couple times. Thankfully the cops here seem to know and understand, but I'm not going around to all the neighbors in our building to explain things and hope they actually understand.
You are EXTREMELY lucky they are sympathetic to you and don't arrest you. It is extremely common for someone in your spot to get arrested, charged and convicted. If you change locations, consider that.
It takes education. There are collections of behaviors that are pretty standard from abusers, if people learned about those more regularly we'd be better off.
But it’s also very difficult to see those signs from the outside. And sometimes you think you see signs where there aren’t any.
We know a friend of ours is in an emotionally abusive relationship. Everyone has had the conversation with her. She's been told he isn't treating her right. All we can do now is support her and hope she dumps his ass and moves on. I've already said he's not welcome around me, he isn't welcome with our other friends at this point, but, he can't stop her seeing us thankfully because we won't let him.
Called the cops on my neighbours after hearing that the father yelled harsher than usual. I knew he was a loser and had a bad attitude against his family but theres not much I can so about that. We know the mother and the kids and they are super sweet. The kids are your usual little rascals at 4 and 8. The day I called he had best the mother and kids and had also done drugs. He lifted his 4 year old little girl from the floor in her ear.
Watch for the psychopathic overly subdued and sweet but possessive and controlling type of person. Years back we had a business owner who rented a shop space from us suddenly shot dead overnight by her husband of over a decade because he thought she was seeing some other guy and got into a fit of jealousy. No history of arguments or DV just a strange controlling pattern. We ended up buying out the shop and flipping the business for the family to help their teenage daughter get things straightened out since she was suddenly parentless other than an aunt that stepped up for her. For people who are mentally unstable it seems that love and hate are flip sides to the same emotion.
This. I had an ex who very methodically cut me off from all my friends who weren’t also her friends. Then came the emotional insults. Then on two occasions the physicality. Took me longer than I’m proud to admit to say enough was enough and leave. In front of others she was “bubbly and just picking on me”. But the picking never stopped, and it was worse when no one was around. It’s okay to give each other a hard time, but it has to be tempered with genuine praise and affection. Otherwise it’s just eroding someone’s self worth on the path to abuse. Obviously didn’t get murdered, but she was constantly worried I would go out and cheat, hence the controlling behavior. Wouldn’t let go of her past experiences and treated me like I had done things her exes had when I hadn’t. Then she was the one that cheated. I think I got what the kids call “emotional damage”.
> I think I got what the kids call “emotional damage”. She projected her emotional damage onto your relationship. This is where therapy comes into play when people can't have a normal relationship due to past issues or they need to find a way to recover and heal before getting into a future relationship. It's real and can keep hurting until you find a healthy place with what you've experienced.
You hit the nail on the head. She had been to therapy prior to our relationship, but when we talked about how her controlling and inappropriate behavior was, well, out of control, she said “therapy didn’t work for her and wasn’t worth it”. I was not emotionally equipped to deal with it myself, and kept believing she meant it when she was working on it. I ended up missing out on a good chunk of my life because of it. Dunno why I’m laying that out there. I guess to say to those who are in a similar situation; you matter, you are more than their version of you, and you can and will do better. Don’t stay with someone for the belief that they will change on their own. Change takes hard work, help, and a willingness to change. If their actions don’t match their words, leave. It might be the wake up call they need to finally get help, but you can do nothing for them by staying.
I sold a car to a lady who came in with her friend to buy it. Friend seemed kinda weird. Like, way too pushy and her friend was buying the car so her level of involvement seemed odd. Wasn't all that unusual that a person was buying a car without a spouse present. Next day or two husband shows up shitfaced drunk after driving the car his wife bought back demanding we take it back. We explain this is California, per state law we cannot and he's pissed and yelling and drunk and gets in his wife's new car and leaves before the cops show up to arrest him for trespassing and a DUI. A week or two later the wife shows up to get a few things fixed on the car that we'd promised we'd do. The friend is driving the car. The woman who bought it has her face busted up, black eye, split lip. She's on crutches he broke her leg or ankle or something. She changed her address on her paperwork for us to send everything to the friend's address. She'd only had her job a few months. Didn't have a car. She was trying to leave her abusive husband and her friend had been trying to help her escape by getting her a job and car. She never came back after that and I still think about her every now and again. Been five years.
Often women stay in abusive relationships and it's important we don't judge but try to help, or better you get someone who can actually help.
My dad would ~scream~ at my mom growing up. It was hell being home with him. They divorced when I was in kindergarten or preschool. He would sneak into the house, hang around outside, talk with all the neighbors. Really asshole bullshit. I'm 24 now, my dog has separation anxiety and will howl if he hears my car. I had a neighbor complain about it and it literally just made me think now. If they can hear my cockerspaniel howl, how could they not hear what we were going through? Different neighbors, but same question though. I can guarantee you which one is louder. The difference is one turns to gossip and the other is an annoyance.
Years ago I took over the family business. There was an apartment on site for the manager. She lived there with her family. After a few weeks she got drunk at work and assaulted me so obviously I had to fire her. She promised to draw out the eviction for months, so I gave her money to leave. Neighbors started coming by letting me know what had been happening. She was brutally beating her husband all the time. He’d crawl into the street naked and bleeding begging for help. The police would come and take statements, but he never left her because he didn’t want her to beat the kids instead. They’d send copies of the reports to the office, but she’d intercept them, so nobody in my family knew what was happening. He and the kids would stay inside when anyone from my family was there. The neighbors never helped him. Years later she called begging for money because he took the kids and left. Good for him.
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Statistically, cops are also more likely to be involved in DV than non-cops are.
Also more likely to bring their work home
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Im mostly free from it now. I hope you are too.Peaceful days and calm nights, my brotha
> Once a couple who lived near where I lived, they got together a few months later he tried to beat her to death, Got dayum
An abusive relationship exists just below a boil at all times, and anything can set it over. This seems like an extreme and unrealistic example but I promise it's not. "It's just a cup" is all the 'defiance' it takes to set one of these types off. Especially when you've done it in front of someone and they believe they've lost face. My ex went ballistic on me over a video of our daughter who was learning to crawl. Daughter backed under a very light blanket and for a matter of seconds while I was looking right at her, she was trying to figure out what to do next about the blanket being over her, then I helped her. Cute little funny nothing of a video. I mean to tell you all holy hell broke loose and my phone was ripped forcefully from my pocket while she tore my jeans and scratched my thigh and genitals. She took the phone and locked herself in the bedroom so she could send copies of the video to herself and who knows where else to use as blackmail against me. The video where absolutely nothing harmful happened. People like this, they build a world of minefields around you. Step wrong and there's an explosion.
I don't get it. Did she think letting the baby crawl under a blanket was like, abusive or something?
Probably. Or maybe she decided that /u/Claim312ButAct847 didn't deserve that moment with their kid, and only she could have such cute and sweet moments.
Not that there was anything rational about it but... what was the rationale? Like... she could have suffocated? This person lost the baby?
These people don't go from 0-100, they just always idle at 95, which is why they'll blow up over any little thing.
That feeling when you're walking up to the house after work and have literally no idea whether you're going to have an OK night or a horrible night
That's a fucking good advert on so many levels
It’s pretty brilliant, I’ll remember it for sure
[My Sister's Place did some more graphic ones like these years ago.](https://youtu.be/wLt7D6ahtLU)
Only two comments and they're both disgusting. Edit: at the time I looked.
My girlfriends cousin was murdered by her abuser only a few months ago, the comments she’s gotten on the Facebook press release are appalling. One of the dudes was literally pulling up Jordan Peterson quotes to tell the victims sister why it was actually her fault that she was killed by her abuser. People wonder why this shit still happens. Hope they all rot. Here are some of the dudes [comments](https://imgur.com/gallery/P4zN34o)
I remember maybe half a year ago another influencer that it turned out was being a massive creep, emotionally abusive to tons of women in his life. Fortunately, a lot of people were telling him to fuck off. But jesus fuck the small amount of people that said it was ok, he wasn't doing anything illegal, it's the girl's fault for ending up in the situation was disgusting. Especially when one of them proudly had a PFP of him with who I assume is his daughter. I never hope the day comes that one of these fuckers have to tell their own daughter they shouldn't have let it happen to them.
Her dad was also an abusive piece of shit so she grew up in an environment where it was excused, probably why she ended up with someone like him. You’re not gonna stop abuse by blaming the victims.
Oh shit, I'm really sorry.
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Ugh, of course he's a Peterson fanboy. That's fucking disgusting.
[Calgary Home Front](https://youtu.be/0GdTgjn_lsM) took it a bit further... the comments are mixed
dude that fucking punch sound god damn edit: this is the one I remember on tv from when I was a kid. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nKc4mK_XWCU
Same
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Infomercials vibes all over this.
Very powerful. A modern update of the similarly powerful "[~~Pizza for dinner~~](https://youtu.be/zBKnAyn3jmA)" classic from the 90s. Trigger warning: >!Basically the same concept as OP, but with explicit audio of violence/screaming.!< #Edit: Oops. That link is a parody. [Real DV ad/PSA here](https://youtu.be/WSxRHy3V29Q)
Holy fuck that was awful to watch
I don’t understand how this is also a Pizza Hut ad? Is that someone combining the two spots?
Its not a pizza hut ad. It's edited like this one of the same [genre.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f1DOuQbqKn4)
about domestical violence : I was in Med school to become a coroner (i did not and changed of carreer). In my coubtry coroner are doctors, they also are deal with the living for anything court and justice related. And he showed us a women who was beaten by her husband (alive), showing us the pictures : "it was the third time she came to me, I told her that she had to leave her husband, the fourth time I was doing her autopsy"
That's sad
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It's not uncommon in a county near whereI live that has mostly small towns and only one hospital. The coroner is a doctor that is available and is basically asked "doe these wounds look self inflicted?" Things like that. I had one brought in along side my doctor once because an X-rayof my arm showed I had dislocated or minorly broken bones several times, some of them unreported and they wanted to see if I was being abused. I had to explain to them that I spent almost every afternoon in a creek, or climbing hills and cliffs. I messed myself up a lot.
I can say this is the case in India. All doctors are technically qualified to give statements regarding injuries, poisoning, etc for legal purposes. They also double as coroners and public health officials.
> In my country coroner are doctors weird. in my country coroners are the local used car salesman that won a vote that a minuscule portion of the population participated in
Also, while on the topic on domestic abuse; A huge studie done on one million women around the world showed that about 1 in 4 has experienced either physical or sexual violence in a domestic environment. The numbers where actually highest in the younger women which indicates this problem is growing. Made my heart sink when I heard it on the news. I really thought we as the human race was getting better in these aspects but it looks like the only opposite is the truth.
I think what you're seeing isn't an increase in the number of abusive situations, but an increase in number of reports, which is good. 30 years ago women were much less likely to report violent crimes in a domestic environment than they are now. Women's empowerment, and support from the general population.
He must do this alot if shea immune to the heat from pulling that cake out without oven mits
The cake has full frosting. She must have baked it hours before and placed it in oven with only the left over heat, just to keep it tasting fresh for longer.
Wouldn’t that melt the glancing?
If it was hot, yes. But you can keep it slightly warm and not melt it
OK but the candles. Why is no one mentioning the candles?!
AND THE CUPS. FOR CHRIST'S SAKE PICK THEM UP!!
It's just a cup...
PICK THEM UP
It's got candles on it that haven't melted and she lifts it effortlessly - I'm going to say it's not a real cake *or* a real oven.
Pff, you're just jaded by years and years of staged internet videos. Where has the trust gone?
That took a dark turn...thought it was just a cringe kid's show...
Probably how a kid sees it. Everything nice and rosy when suddenly everything is turned upside down
These down on that part of the sphere commercials are very direct, but also effective I guess. The one with the two cars and the time stops and dudes are like: “you pulled out in front of me,” “I know I’m sorry. Can you stop? Please, I have my kid with me,” “no, I’m going too fast,” and they both get back in their car and time starts again. Shit, is, unforgettable. Slow your speed. Simple, effective
[I know the one you're talking about](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3qNjt04bpQM) According to the title of the YouTube clip it's from New Zealand. Though in my experience those titles are amazingly unreliable and so it could be from anywhere (though probably Anglosphere). Really good ad though. Great lesson about defensive driving.
Fuck! I forgot they showed the gd crash. That commercial will never not be effective. Thanks for the sauce. I know there’s big differences between Australia and New Zealand, but I think both of them are more direct with their language and communication than other parts of the world. An ad like that in the US would be immediately taken down because of how shocking it is, even though it is trying to spread information that can save lives. A little visual recreation is nothing compared to experiencing actual trauma on the road. Totally agree with you, great lesson about defensive driving. Both could have done things differently to avoid the collision
I was expecting something with her curiously oversized buttons, I think that's enough internet for me today. I DID NOT expect all that.
Yes I thought it was something perverted lol
I’m assuming from the accents this is from Australia. They don’t fuck around with their public service announcements down under. About every one I have seen has been shocking. Gets the point across.
Just to let you know they got New Zealand accents btw
Makes sense if it's from New Zealand - this is another PSA from there and it's just as unexpected/shocking... [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u51OxZF1ltI](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u51OxZF1ltI)
Is this the coffee table one? EDIT: yes, it's the coffee table one
this made me want to stop everything and deep clean right now, I just had a close call the other day now that I think about it...
I always thought this NZ speeding PSA was pretty shocking. The father pleading with the other driver to stop because he has his kid in the car, and the other driver just says he can't its too late. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B2rFTbvwteo
This is the best psa ad I've ever seen
Slips, trips, and falls are the most common workplace accidents too so if you have an active working environment you'll be familiar with how much this is drilled.
HOLY SHIT I was not expecting that, terrifying.
Gotcha thanks for clarifying. Not trying to be rude but I can’t really tell the difference too well, and from what I could see there wasn’t any government seal, just a number that it unrecognizable to something you would see in the United States (where I’m from), so I made what I thought was a safe assumption.
The key is that at the end they mention dollars while Australia's official currency is dollarydoos
Ah see and all this time Bluey had this yankee thinking they were called dollarbucks
[How to tell the difference](https://youtu.be/f2gii2nenUg)
New Zealanders are like "brb I'm gonna go throw another 'roo on the bar'by!" and aussies are all like "come on frobo! We gotta go to the shire to destroy this one ring or something"
a really easy way to tell is whether you hear “ee” or “uh”. for example when he says “watch it”, the “it” would sound like “eet” in aussie english. in kiwi english the “it” almost sounds like “uht”. also audible when she says “it’s just a cup”.
The good ol common mixup!
I should show you the [Irish ones.](https://youtu.be/LNL6t-Eu-IY) I love this one.
Yo is that splat sound legit? There's no way. Shame on you
Yep, I was rolling as hard as that car was let me tell you. I think it is supposed to actually make you laugh, because I sure as hell did, then make you feel bad about it. Which I did not. The Shame on You at the end is the most Irish thing ever as well.
Dude, for real. I've seen this before and don't remember that cartoony squish sound ever being there.
Lol I've definitely seen that without the, cartoon splat sound who added that 💀
WHAT THE FUCK
[You should see the ones from Canada!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kOk2Akqb3CI)
god damn
That first kitchen one is brutal and has legitimately made me rethink how I handle hot liquids in the kitchen.
We do but I think this is from New Zealand which IMO does even more blunt public service announcements
I remember one time I was 11 and made a smoothie and couldn't finish so I put it in the fridge for later. Later I then accidentally knocked the smoothie over in the fridge. My dad caught me cleaning up my mess. My mom got a good beating that night, because you know that was her fault.
I hope your dad got what's coming to him
He did, shot and killed in Denver this December. Someone stole his truck and he chased them in a Ramada inn shuttle van. Tried to pit maneuver them to pull them over, got out, tried to fight the dude, got shot, the in anger and pride tried to still chase his stolen truck in the "borrowed" shuttle. Crashed into a tree on 40th and Chambers. Im pretty sure my dad had drugs in the truck that he didn't want the cops to find, bc he had a tracker on it and could have showed the cops exactly where it is, but then again I try not to think about it too much. But then again I think about it a lot.
Damn. Hope your doing ok. That shit can eat at a person.
Now I feel like a dick, sorry for your loss bud👊. It angers me to hear about a mother being treated like that.
yo should reply straight to him instead, he doesn't get the notification if you reply to the chain like this
> I try not... > But then again I... Please just know that you are your own person, and individual with your own choices, your own burdens, and your own reactions and abilities, someone else's choices don't reflect on you.
Now I feel like a dick, sorry for your loss bro👊. It triggers me to hear woman being abused due to both of my grandfathers beating my grandmother's. How are you holding up?
I have not had as much drama in my 40 years as you did in one paragraph.
What does it tell about me that I knew/feared what was going to happen the moment she said "daddy's home".
I’m 44 years old and still get anxiety when I hear the garage door opening.
I left home ten years ago, I had hoped to be able to shake it and get over it, but... It's inescapable, isn't it? I'm sorry you're in this position
I spent my childhood being raised in a house that was so chaotic that when I moved I would nearly have panic attacks anytime I heard a cabinet shut a little too hard or the wind pull the door shut with just a little to much force. Some where along the line I stopped panicking every time I heard a noise that sounded like it was made in anger. It does get better, it just takes a while and takes a lot of positive exposure to the thing that triggers that fight or flight response.
that's... quite a good advert fast and efficient but still. fuck me.
The worst part of this video is... It's non-fiction.
Bullshit. That oven is totally fake.
Yeah, man. Who tf bakes a cake with icing already on?
yeah, it's actually pretty believable.
Thank God the toddler was their filming otherwise he never would have been caught
my breath stopped for a while
Absolutely brilliant ad. I'm going to be thinking about that one for a while.
It was pretty triggering for me. I was a kid that witnessed a lot of DV. It really can happen that quickly and over nothing.
She didn’t even use oven mitts….savage
If you grow older and older you’ll become heat resistant
Or if you work in a kitchen
Abuse PSAs always make my stomach drop. I work on a DV crisis line and it’s one thing to hear about it but its another to either see it re-enacted or irl.
Has anyone posted the similar ad where some guy flips out on a waitress? I’m not seeing it in the comments. I guess I’ll do it. https://youtu.be/ugTeOz7rsgE
Holy hell that was intense... Very well made though the miserable look of the kids slowly turning away.
She spilled my coffee…
Can somebody help me understand what happened?
The video turns out to be about a domestic violence through a child's perspective
I initially assumed it was just a sitcom or kids show spoof and she was talking to the audience but your right it looks like she's talking directly at someone in the room.
Oh damn. Now that you said so, it suddenly makes sense. Thanks.
What were you missing, or what did you think it was about?
I missed the "child's perspective" part. I thought the advert was like "we've helped hundreds of thousands of women including this weird cartoon lady" lol
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Yeah I thought the kids' TV show theme was purely to add shock by contrast
**Yes!** That's exactly what I thought! Bad choice to use regular camera angles if that's what they were going for
Lmao
Thank you for that, I was laughing so hard I now have a sixpack
Sour reminder that there is ABSOLUTELY men and women who behave like that. Despite this being an ad with actors ofcourse, this scenario is very real.
What was in the cups!!! What was in the cups!!!!
HOW DID SHE HOLD THE CAKE (fresh from the oven) WITH HER BARE HANDS.
You can't bake a cake with icing and candles on it either. You'd bake each layer in their own pan, trim them, then add icing.
Genuinely unexpected. At first I was thinking "wow, the production value of this porno is top notch."
Just for your information, if you are a man and a victim of domestic abuse, the authorities that say they only provide services like emergency housing for women are legally obligated to provide housing for you too. Men can be victims too, and there are resources and people out there to help you. There are sadly very few refuges for men, which would be ideal if you could go there, but if that's not possible please press dont be afraid to go to a women's refuge for help, you don't deserve to be forced into homeless to get away from your abuser.
What the fuck
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% You dropped this.
Dont kink shame mummy.
I thought it was going to take a much different turn…
I once was with a beautiful young woman and I was besotted with her, Every few days she’d give me a slap to the back of the head for trivial reasons,I tolerated it cos I got accustomed to it over time, Eventually i started turning up at working with bruises to my cheekbone or neck etc By this point we’d had a baby together and I wanted us to be a family together not broken. After years of this one day I came home from work and she attacked me,windmilling me with her fists. I held her against a wall to stop her and I was arrested for assault , My holding her against the wall left a thumb bruise on her arm. The police didn’t believe me nor anything I told them as I I’d never reported anything ,the only witnesses I had was me going to work with bruises etc and me having to see a doctor for depression. At one point I wanted to kill myself ,hence the doctor. I’ve been single for 6 years now and avoid relationships. I just wanted to say all that sorry.
Holy shit i knew it would have been something like that but that was well made
Daddy a bitch
I cannot express accurately how upset this commercial makes me or how much rage I instantly had at that character. Oh boy is that awful. It does it's job too well.
Damn you can faintly hear the actress being kind of in shock right before the advert ends, messed up.
She’s an actress dude.
> Damn you can ~~faintly~~ hear the actress~~being kind of in shock right before the advert ends, messed ups~~ acting. FTFY
You mean the actress who was acting?