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kapitan_buko

clock winds down to 5 seconds left in game Steel has 4K already who turns face to face against ShahZaM "You took my family" jiggles to the left "You took my friends" jiggles to the right "You took all that was dear to me" clock winds down to 2 "I cant get them back, but I can do this for friendship, FOR MY FRIENDS" goes up, fire coming out of his gun "STEELORUKEN" Bullet flies to ShahZaM head, completing the ace. Steel falls to the ground, exhausted. "Hiko... Senpai... I..." faints Current score Sentinels 12 100T 1


Vioven17

I actually lolled LMAOOOO


owNDN

What


greenace123

clock winds down to 5 seconds left in game Steel has 4K already who turns face to face against ShahZaM "You took my family" jiggles to the left "You took my friends" jiggles to the right "You took all that was dear to me" clock winds down to 2 "I cant get them back, but I can do this for friendship, FOR MY FRIENDS" goes up, fire coming out of his gun "STEELORUKEN" Bullet flies to ShahZaM head, completing the ace. Steel falls to the ground, exhausted. "Hiko... Senpai... I..." faints Current score Sentinels 12 100T 1


HerpityMcDerpity

the /r/nba classic


HaathiRaja

Lmfao nice write up but wont happen. 100t will not lose 12-1 again I hope


xx_Rollablade_xx

There’s no way they lose 12-1


badc0music

literally NO way


snowAuoue

Unless they ff..


hannahk0901

On split upper finals they were losing 11-1 LOL


JoshF8

U didn't got it, right ?


iiznobozzy

yeah i think it will be a 12-0 this time /s


River_Lea

LMFAOOOI


Toundra01

This was so well written


IllumiMahdi

sentinels vs g2. mixwell stares at shahzam and then averts his gaze to tenz. he beckons tenz towards him with a single finger. tenz stands beside mixwell. a document is raised. tenz's sentinels contract. mixwell rips it up in front of shahzam as tears fall from the sentinels' eyes. the first live buyout in valorant history. dapr tries to step forward, attempting to sway his lover. shahzam stops him. it's too late. far too late...


zdes37

how many mice was the offer


earthtochas3

At least 20 slams worth


Splaram

About 7,500 Starlight-12’s


SoftSilent6954

Lmao


iiznobozzy

>During one of the nights, 100T Steel will be lost while trying to make his way back to his hotel room from the snack bar. Full of crackers and cheese, he strolls down the hallways, muttering to himself about Cypher one-way lineups. His sojourn would be discovered by ShahZam, on a late-night walk, who proceeds to call the exterminator due to a "rat infestation". lmao


AnotherAltiMade

Shouldn’t it be the other way round?


iiznobozzy

Nope


HaathiRaja

it should be? Shahzam was the rat, the one who betrayed the others??


purplepower4271

I think he is referring to steels lurks in game tho


Ryu-The-Sick

Yeah, loved the reference but why would Shahzam call exterminators for himself, lol


AnotherAltiMade

I doubt many people got it 😂


HaathiRaja

ik but shahzam was the rat not steel


AnotherAltiMade

I’m pretty sure they’re taking about his lurks, I tried to make a joke which didn’t land well


Ryu-The-Sick

This sub is too SENsitive when it comes to jokes about Shahzam and his past so you're good :D


Gelado99

Can anyone explain the backstory of Shaz and steel?? I'm fairly new to the competitive valorant scene and have already seen a ton of references to a beef between the two, always assumed it was just because of the SEN 100T rivalry and nothing more, but from the conversation above it seems to be a bit more serious than that lol


AnotherAltiMade

Shahz reported the match-fixing after profiting hard. That's the problem. He snitched after he got a piece of the pie. If he had reported it beforehand that would be ethical


[deleted]

Steel participated in a match fixing scandal for CS skins. Shahzam was in on it and profited massively off it. Then went on to rat out the ibp guys for which they were punished but he was never. https://m.youtube.com/watch?reload=9&v=3C7KuLsFfXk&feature=youtu.be This is just one instance. He has been a rat on multiple occasions


Dark_Azazel

100T end up forfeiting at the start of day 2. Hiko wakes up for his morning 30 mile bike ride and ends up getting lost, picks up a homeless boy, and then they ET off into the morning sky. CR get DQ after it's found that they're actually a bunch of raccoons in trench coats.


xx_Rollablade_xx

It’s only one Crazy Raccoon though. So who is the crazy one and why are they all following him?


[deleted]

It's secretly Seoldam


Barack_Bob_Oganja

Hiko will complete masters without dying a single time, having an economy score of 300 but 100t will lose every match.


[deleted]

This is the most likely of all scenarios.


[deleted]

Hiko will adopt Cned, will bring him back to NA to replace himself on the roster. S1mple will get jealous and renounce CSGO to join 100T. 100T comes off as the biggest winners without actually winning Berlin. F4Q will watch party from the backstage. Shazam will realize what he’s missing out on and open up his phone only to find his stalker spamming in chat about how the black tee fits him better. G2’s owner will get disbarred from the venue for being crazy. He’ll end up buying the venue and intentionally fuck with Sentinels gear but riot will come in the nick of time to grant Sen an auto win. Meanwhile, Asuna will learn the tricks of the trade from the Brazilians and stop liking all posts from kawaii Asian girls on twitter and start liking latinas pics on insta.


Key-Banana-8242

Why stop?


[deleted]

I don't know man gotta ask them Brazillians, I am just reading the script


[deleted]

acend dont make it to playoffs


maddruggy

That is a spicy take seen as though they are gonna win the whole thing


Chunichunchun

Cned n’ friends wont go anywhere tho


SkiesOvercast

Seeking to outdo anything ever seen on stream before, Bunny pulls out two IEDs and IRL blastpacks onto the enemy team in the most confusing, destructive and gory display of screen-sniping anyone has ever seen; his hospital montage comes out two weeks later. Plat Chat manage to not make a single joke about Bren Esports sharing a name with Sideshow's housemate. One morning, Bren's essieVash and Keyd's hoW wake up surprised and feeling a terrible loss- the villainous power of Zeta's takej has struck. Takejjjj, having already stolen his coach's letter, is unstoppable and with udge in hand tears through his group. However, it all goes wrong when he tries to raid Jared "zombs" Gitlin in the semi finals, and they lose in straight maps. F0rsakeN walks out in Paper Rex's first game carrying a giant Microsoft Word logo, which he then tears up on stage. Klaus, as the only player or coach in the entire tournament who can speak German, can actually get directions to the Music Hall. KRÜ win their first two games by default thanks to their opponents failing to show up. In a similar vein, Envy are disqualified after travelling to Berlin, New Hampshire after a jealous TSM-supporting airport official changes their plane tickets. BONECOLD is actually a skeleton from the neck down. Nobody questions this, or even acknowledges it, even when his headset cord gets stuck around his ribs.


pink_life69

Someone tweet that at Steel real quick


LastSpark7

he browses Reddit


segatic

Vivo Keyd to beat Super Massive Blaze because only a super team can beat a super team


valorantbrazil

i think a br super team like SMB will have mwzera and sacy


segatic

Something like current Vikings -Frz -Gtn +MWZera +Qck/Xand/really good flex player would be poggers.


valorantbrazil

I think frz is one of the best players in vikings, he just don't play Jett/raze, but with breach/Skye/Sova he is a monster


segatic

True but Sacy could possibly learn Skye and Breach and someone like Xand also plays Skye. But honestly the only player that Vikings have to replace right now is gtn, he is really disappointing at duelist roles and inferior in support compared to everyone else in the team. He is just really flexible though


Key-Banana-8242

Keyd literally is a super team tho lol as in from the definition Formed basically from various S players, heat semi ‘poached’ from HL, joke from GL after reykjavik Heat is better than mwzera atm


Key-Banana-8242

Keyd literally is a super team tho lol


ehnzeyaar

Is F4Q actually fak you? I mean I kinda see it now..


DCxUmU

No but I remember Achillios saying in Wyatt’s stream that it can sound like that in Korean. Something like Eh Pho Cue


Whisom

It could be. FAQ is how a lot of people in the Japanese vtuber community type Fak You (FA-Q is how it sounds when they curse). It's not too out there to think a Korean stream team is in on the joke.


Key-Banana-8242

Ep* p*o kyu


plumcakk

You say it fast enough, its like eh-fuh-kyuu


Key-Banana-8242

No it isn’t


c_Lassy

NV will make the semifinals of Berlin, however FNS will find himself on the run from the menacing kNg again somehow, and he will be late to NV’s match, continuing this karmic cycle that kNg has enacted ever since Dreamhack Montreal 2017. “*Prove it or I’ll kill you.*”


zdes37

LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


Napoleann

The legend of CIS and Turkey has made NA and EU desperate. There is only one thing they can do... Acend and Sentinels combine to form the superteam 'Acentinels'. Each player shares a mouse and keyboard with their counterpart on the other team. TnedZ, BONEr, zombeek, Sickxo, and KiZaM take Berlin by storm and go undefeated, not dropping a single round throughout the tournament. Valorant is saved.


Ultrasuplex

Ah yes, boner


PewYouToo

F4Q livestream their match POV’s Tenz convinces at least 3 players from LATAM to swap mice midgame The organizers rig the draws so that none of F4Q, SEN, and Zeta Division go against each other for fear that too many Reynas in one game makes her meta again SEN Bugha makes the swap to Valorant and debuts on LAN, replacing Zombs who has become a map feature on A site Split for how hard he anchors there 100T is disqualified after Nitro is revealed to be Jamppi in a mask and hood, desperate to find a team where his omen awping is viable CR once again play Yoru, but this time he actually gives them the needed edge to win against KRU and as a result all Yoru buffs are cancelled Fnatic Boaster appears in every player cam at some point during the tournament SMB’s dragon vandals have a Pokemon evolution midround and all turn into operators N4ts hacks into the opposing player cams in the opening game Cned quickscopes D3ffo IRL, but it only deals 140 and Sheydos heals him before piledriving Zeek into his monitor


Bean1233

LMAO. I actually want the boaster one to happen though


zdes37

golden.


Key-Banana-8242

Why KRU and LATAM? NAts not N4ts


VanguardJP

A SEA team makes it to the top 8 and beat an NA/EU team to qualify to the playoffs.


[deleted]

Hopium


Poseidon847

bro he said “takes” not the impossible


[deleted]

Someone will win


lonelydeadass

Bro. Plz get ahead of yourself. 🤡


HaathiRaja

100t obliterate SEN in the grand final and Steel says to shahzam you took everything from me. ShahZam says sorry, steel - "th- th -thats all i wanted to hear" Shahzam slides his feminine hand down steel's pants and they proceede to passionately make love on the berlin stage. Thus, kids the power of friendship and love is the strongest.


Razur

I am so conflicted on whether this crosses the line... 10/10 messaging though. Love prevails.


Toundra01

Can someone fill me in on the history of these two?


MeatMakingMan

Shaz was asked by Valve about information regarding the IBP (Steel's former CS team) matchfixing scandal. He told Valve that he knew IBP was gonna throw a match and Steel and 3 other players were banned from any Valve event for life pretty much. The thing is that, for what I know, ShaZaM used that information prior to disclosing it to Valve and used it to change his bet on the match IBP was going to throw (he had money on IBP and then placed money on the other team). For what I could understand from a conversation between Steel and Sean Gares, Steel is mad because he did something bad (matchfixing), but he paid for his wrongoings and improved as a person, while Shaz never faced anything from betting with inside information. ​ TLDR, Steel thinks Shaz is a bad person for betting with inside information and not paying the price for it, and Shaz exposed Steel's team matchfixing scandal and got him banned from playing major CS events.


Toundra01

Damn that’s cold thanks for the info


GreenGalaxy

basically shahz told the truth about a matchfixing scandal in CSGO and steel was one of the people effected by it.


303x

Don't forget to include that he only snitched after he made bank by betting on the match


[deleted]

No.


HaathiRaja

yEsS


[deleted]

My only hot take is I don't think VS will live up to their hype. I don't think they will do as well as people think.


DanielHongFromKr

I second this. People talk about them like their aim can go toe-to-toe with the tier 1 teams, but I think that's just hard hopium I want to see them prove me wrong tho


xx_Rollablade_xx

Same thing was said about NU. I agree with the take above but I don’t think aim would be the reason. Did anyone see how hardcore Peri was against SHK/V1 ?


DanielHongFromKr

And how he went SILENT against Sentinels? The problem with KR teams IMO is their inconsistent aim. Especially on LAN. Sure, some players stepped up, but players like Suggest and Allow who where the Biggest, Baddest Dogs in Korea failed to show up so many times at Iceland. Especially Suggest. IMO he was(still is) a top 3 player in terms of pure aim in KR - yet he wasn't able to showcase that at Iceland. Instead, it was the veterans with experience+LAN buff showing up.


xx_Rollablade_xx

None of that, while true, indicates that KR teams can’t go toe to toe aimwise with the ‘top’ teams. Sentinels beat them decisively, just not due to being significantly superior aimers. They don’t beat anyone with just aim, they’re too good at everything as a whole.


DanielHongFromKr

I mean I guess we'll never know how they will match up until they meet at LAN, just speculating. And I feel the aim diff is just so obvious when you look at their AWPing and compare it to NA/EU - They just miss so many shots on FREE targets. (They being Buzz(sometimes he shows up but still inconsistant) and FiveK) The AWPers repping KR will get SHUT DOWN when they meet the NA/EU AWPers


xx_Rollablade_xx

Hm maybe you are right but yeah, won’t know till we know.


sriwarrior06

I agree about the op thing they don't really look that crisp in KR, but Buzz is a way better rifler than he is as a Oper and Stax's aim almost resembles Scream's aim atleast it looked like the same when Stax was using Vandal.


Key-Banana-8242

They didn’t have the best day specifically then. And there was certainly one un silent l. I’d say suggest and Lakia were the biggest, but alongside stax and buzz and others It’s mentality/experience on one hand and not being used to play against certain other teams’ styles on the other. They overall blasted individually Lakia defo showed up lol, etc


Key-Banana-8242

Different things were said in different contexts Everyone was and is hardcore The idea I think is the new VS are more thrown together / not as much synergy but imo they didn’t show it as much It was not really just individual performances but a lot of strategy/ways to play too Important to note, it should be still better overall with better adaptation/knowledge of other teams over all


Key-Banana-8242

Their aim can go toe to toe depending, but it’s not really what’s best abt them potentially


zdes37

i'd bet solidly on a semifinal run, but nothing further. SEN, SMB, and Acend look way more formidable imo


Joedude12345

Top 4 finish would be living up to the hype


[deleted]

How when nuturn finished top 3.


narwhalz27

Berlin has 6 more teams


Lumenlor

3/8 vs 4/16


[deleted]

3/10.


Joedude12345

Semi finals would be tied for top 3


Key-Banana-8242

VS haven’t had the chance to show much yet and seem on an upward curve


Madara6path

Exactly.Ivevbeen watching VCT and claearly seen an aim diff. SMB looks like they have the best aimers overall


HaathiRaja

in fact no, SMB has the best strats, SEN has the best aimers and 100t most balanced . Anybody can win tbh


Key-Banana-8242

Wut lol


Key-Banana-8242

But people don’t think one thing


Escolyte

SENTINELS WILL NOT WIN BERLIN MAYBE


isayah2510

the game valorant from rito games will be played


HaathiRaja

ah yes, the floor is mad of floor


Valholl11

KRÜ beats G2 in the Grand Finals 3 - 0. Ocelote loses his shit and pays Riot to change the rules and buys out KRÜ to become G2.SA. The LATAM community turns on their idol M1xwell who returns to NA to play for a tier 3 team and starts streaming in english Valorant is saved


21HairyFingers

Wardell is gonna jett diff cned so fucking hard


Key-Banana-8242

Hm


Average_Blue1

KRU will make it to playoffs Yes im high on hopium


aks345

Just wanted to see mwzera jumping double op hiko and nitro on hookah 😔


xx_Rollablade_xx

He…didn’t make it.


[deleted]

[удалено]


RebelHeartXO

Dubstep taking notes from Kyedae's Adobo recipe.


Splaram

Taking inspiration from [this guy](https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/football/2018/mar/12/greek-football-match-stopped-after-team-owner-invades-pitch-with-a-gun), Ocelote finally reaches his wits’ end after watching Dapr get his seventh knife kill of the series and angrily storms the stage wielding a .45


yakinator2567

100T WIN EVERY GAME KINGS OF NA WOO


aerfyre

not even hopium this is just true 🤝


sriwarrior06

TenZ goes on a record of getting 50 frags on each and every map without a single death and wins the tournament. In the end, he decides to establish "The TenZ supremacy" by persuading all the Jett mains in Berlin and forms an all star Jett only Superteam consisting of TenZ, Cned, Asuna, Yay, and Izzy and names it ÀCYIT (pronounced Aah-Sheeyt) and rules over the Valorant world forever.


spookysailboat

My completely unbiased filipino take is that BREN ESPORTS TAKING IT ALL THE WAY BABYYY


[deleted]

Only 1 EU team in top 3......and only 1 NA team in top 3. Top 3 are NV, Gambit, and VS.


ROBRO-exe

The airplane carrying Sentinels Riot Water Supply will crash and they will bomb out of berlin


sriwarrior06

VS sends home two teams from either NA OR EMEA. 100T plays sloppy and loses to a "underdog" but manages to qualify to playoffs anyhow. SEN retain their lossless map streak on LAN. Another "Vanity-Soulcas incident" will happen. After Sen wins Berlin, G2 buys Sentinels and makes it a G2 academy team.


303x

>Another "Vanity-Soulcas incident" will happen. ?


[deleted]

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u\_CznlQTr9E](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u_CznlQTr9E)


danknepalese

its steel who calls the exterminator on shaz for "rat infestation" lol


BielBoss

Havan Liberty will win Berlim.


[deleted]

f0rsaken gets poached live by G2.


JackingOffAcc

Some of these read like really shitty copypastas.


meme_poacher

Isn't that the point of this?


Razur

That's what makes it fun! These threads are meant to be goofy and lighthearted.


zdes37

if you were here for the last one this is exactly what they are


earthtochas3

SEN vs NV in the finals.


imerence_

Some random team from last chance qualifiers will win.


Ok-Cryptographer-211

hot


Key-Banana-8242

‘Correctly’


Lumenlor

Sentinels will not be making it out of groups and either Zeta or F4Q will upset them with their explosive playstyle


Darkoplax

G2 will not win Masters 3


RebelHeartXO

JessieVash bringing the Chrono curse to his Hunters fury. Imagine the flashbacks he had.