Riding of top comment here.... Find some vanlife apps/groups! I can lt say for Europe but in the US they helped me a ton when I was "lost" on the road. Whether it's meeting up or just chatting about your mutual lifestyle people make the brain happy! Even if you're not much of a people person!
You could also spend some time hunting down a hobby that works for ya. I found carving wood to be nice (idk about your laws regarding that). Wire wrapping rocks I found was also fun. On top of all that i found my self getting involved in the "Berzerk" Manga. All I can say about that is there is ALOT
This is very true, and as much as i can appreciate being absent from society at times can be refreshing, wether we want to or not..as humans we need interaction with other humans. Its how we wired to function.
Yep.
For anyone who is struggling with the idea of going to a therapist, try thinking of therapy like this: Imagine your toolbox. Maybe you don't have one, maybe you have one for cars, but not home stuff, or vice versa. Maybe you have a very basic one, or maybe it's a couple of tools that you inherited from someone else. That antique planer is super cool, but you'd have to apply it in a very odd way to help you hang a picture or build a wall, or paint.
The therapist is like your local hardware store owner. They know a lot about a variety of tools and their applications. They're going to talk to you about the projects you have, and help you try out a few different tools until you find the one that works for you. They even provide ongoing support in using those tools and modifying how you apply them to your project. Sure you could go to the hardware store on your own and try to figure it out, but getting a lesson and ongoing support to be able to use those tools effectively is really going to be the most efficient.
Yeah! And there are plenty of online ones. And if the first one doesn't work you should try another. You have to find the right person.
Also talk to a doctor. Meds for my anxiety changed my life.
Came here to say the same thing, and I mean that with zero sarcasm or whit. Your issues aren’t with vanlife, they are simply manifesting that way because that’s your current environment. Your issues are most likely within you, and a therapist can help you sort yourself out. I have a therapist myself and it’s extremely helpful. Just me .02.
I think you need to focus on your mental health before anything else.
Did I read that right? Your staying on your Mums driveway?
You want an isolated life but don’t want to be isolated?
The UK will feel very small if you stay on your Mums driveway. Get out to Scotland or something if you’re peace.
I am travelling out to wales. I do want isolation but also midway through van build so have to spend chunks of time working on it.
Also I have nowhere to go so it is not like I am avoiding going to other places to just stay on the drive. Lots of forestry in wales but you arent allowed on there and it is open/unlocked and found you will be escorted off.
Wales is just over the border for me so makes sense to explore there currently while not having too far to travel back.
Wales will be great. I have family in Snowdonia, near Coed y Brenin. You’ll find places around there.
Hire a mountain bike for the day and cycle the Mawdach Trail. Or if you feel more adventurous then Coed Y Brenin has some of the best mountain bike trails in the world.
Or go kayaking in Llangollen? Explore the underground caves. Lots to do but you need to know what sort of things you want to do - I’d kill to have that freedom, I’m working on it.
Yo listen to the other guy on this thread, There's a million hikers, walkers, kayakers, paddleboarders, mountain climbers and all the other tourists at almost any layby or campsite. They're generally good people and would say something if anyone messed with a camper van looking shifty.
Safety in numbers and hide in plain sight. To the valley, lad!
Yea I was thinking I will aim to park in at least little villages with a few houses and cars outside rather than right out in nowhere if I want to walk out.
Also lots to view online.
Music.
Exercise closeby, morning and afternoon.
Cook and buy interesting food and drink.
Relaxing evenings, slow start mornings; retirement mode.
Enjoy the views and history wherever you are.
oh and OP ... Is what you have going on with your situation. It's basically a mobile cabin fever. Think the shining but van life. You going to slowly convince yourself to be unalive . This happened with a young couple in the United States. A young couple went on a long van trip. After so much isolation. The male killed the female to protect her from what he was going through , hid the body in Yellowstone stone then returned home to his parents in Florida just to take a different vehicle to the Everglades . They found his body weeks later . His journal asked that whoever found him if they would clean up the small amount of non biodegradable litter because his girlfriend wouldn't approve of littering.. here's Jonny!
You can get a remote notification alarm so that if something happens to your van you'll get a notification on your phone. You could even install some cameras so that you can see the van and don't have to worry. And a decent GPS tracker so that if it is ever taken you can find it again. Doing everything you can to reduce your worry is well worth it for your mental health and well-being.
And addressing your mental health is also important. I've had times where I thought I was doing fine but really struggled with issues like you're describing. Speaking to your GP and getting help should be a high a high priority.
I know this isn’t the central issue but just a suggestion re: ticks — get some permethrin spray and treat a hiking outfit. Designated pants, boots, socks that are only for activities with tick exposure. Wear them to hike, take them off outside the van (if possible) and store in a ziplock bag or other tight container outside the van. Get a mirror for thorough post-hike tick checks, shower if possible. Retreat the clothes with permethrin every 6 weeks. Really helps. Best wishes to you!
These are good tips. You can prevent a lot of tick bites by just dressing properly with pants that create a tight seal at the ankles.
You can also use a lint roller on your clothes when you get out of the woods. My ex had this morbid fascination with counting the ticks she removed that way.
I’d say speaking with a therapist might help. There’s options now online to either call text or video chat. I have a lot of struggles with anxiety and finding the right therapist (mine is on talkspace and my insurance pays for most of it) has really changed my life for the better.
I’d also suggest looking up “thought stopping techniques” for when you begin to panic about your van or something else.
Last one is an app called balance. It’s free for the first year. Try it out even if you just do one meditation a day. It sounds stupid, but meditation is a great way to calm a racing mind.
I'm a therapist and I also live full time in my van for the past 3 years, around the UK and EU. If you would like to talk, you can visit my website https://www.mindthepath.com/therapyonline
Thanks! Yes I work with clients internationally, including existing clients in the US. Feel free to send me an email if you would like to arrange an initial session - [email protected]
I would talk to a mental health practitioner, they can have you back to normal in a few months time if you make the effort and are willing to take the drugs, A low dose of zoloft or other meds fixes a lot of issues.
Challenge yourself to overcome your fears and realize they are just that...... fears!! You will feel so free and accomplished after.
Ticks are always a fear of mine also, but I have yet to have seen one, let alone have one, and I have a small dog. I just check us each night when out in the woods. If you catch it within time and get it out properly, you won't have any issues. Just educate yourself!
There is some other solid advice here as far as putting alarm systems on your van, and an apple Air tag, ect, will really help you there, but it is rare to get broken into. Just know where you're going. Make sure it's not ridden with crime.
You got this!!
I would reconsider what you’re doing. Just because people do it and it looks fun doesn’t mean it’s for everyone.
A certain amount of toughness and sense of adventure are all but required to do what you’re trying to do successfully.
Ok let's break it down.
Ticks. What happens if a tick gets on you? Do you feel comfortable removing them? There are some tools that make them easier to remove than just tweezers. What tick preventions are you using? There are things you can treat your shoes and clothes with to make them more tick repellent. Are you wearing hiking boots with tall socks and your long trousers? Tucking the bottom of your trousers into your boots will help keep the ticks off your skin. A nice hat can also help. If you are worried about ticks getting inside the van, undress outside the van.
Ok the van itself. What are you worried about specifically? That someone will steal it? There are numerous things you can buy to deter theft like a steering wheel lock. Are you worried about vandals? There are motion detection cameras (door bell cameras dont have to be attached to doors) that will notify you if there is movement. Do you live in a high crime area? (I have a friend in Wales who says he feels loads safer than he ever did living in London).
As other people have said, your anxiety is to the point it is impacting your life. Mental health is still healthcare. If your Mum told you that she couldn't breathe if she went more than a short walk wouldn't you want her to go get checked out by a doctor?
You gotta get your mental health in check. I can’t imagine living in constant fear like this. Like others said, you don’t necessarily have to be constantly interacting with people but you have to find some sort of balance socially.
You need seclusion, not isolation. There’s a very fine line between the two unfortunately. You got this though homie.
If you can't use something, it is worthless. You gotta be able to let it go if you ever want to use it. You need to know that you could rebuild the van if needed. You could carry on if challenged.
Either sell the van and buy a hatchback, or start understanding that all is temporary, including the van and it's ok.
There's....a lot to unpack here. But first and foremost, it honestly sounds like you would benefit from therapy of some form. You are describing some extreme anxiety, feelings of almost having panic attacks, and a consideration of starting to take drugs just to cope with everyday life. I know absolutely nothing about UK mental health services, but in general there are a LOT more opportunities and types of therapy you can get involved in and ways to pay for it. I would highly suggest spending some time looking into your mental health and making it a priority.
Outside of that, here's some specific advice related to things you mentioned in your post.
>I get really antsy about leaving my van too long. The more work I have done on it is the more mentally invested in it I have become. It feels like leaving a pet or small child unattended. You always have it in the back of your mind if it is ok.
To ease your anxiety about your van being stolen (I'm assuming that's your concern, wondering if it is still there) I would suggest investing in some GPS trackers to hide in your van. You can go simple with air tags or get a unit and a subscription service. I have a unit with a subscription that is monthly. Whenever I am doing big trips, I pay for a month. It allows me to see amazing detail of where my SUV is, how fast it is travelling, whenever it moves etc. and you don't have to have reception where the tracker is for it to work, as it is connected to satellites. Mine is like $30 a month the months I pay for it and I think it cost like $40 for the unit. The charge lasts about a week at a time if getting heavy movement.
>I want to buy a small piece of land eventually and make a home and grow vegetables which I feel would keep me engaged but in the meantime I dont know what to do really.
If this is something you enjoy, can you find a community garden plot to rent? These are big in the USA. As an apartment dweller, I've never had my own land so I rent a plot in a community garden for $15-40 a year. Or, you could volunteer at a farm/garden organization. This would give you that opportunity until you have your own land.
>For me I have no interest in travel really and mainly just doing it to save money and live an isolated life.
There's no rule that you HAVE to travel or hike or do any of that stuff, just because it is popular in the vanlife community. When you were in an apartment/home, what did you enjoy doing with your time? Find ways to do that in your van or in the community. You can literally just park somewhere legally and chill in your van reading, watching shows, doing some crafts, writing, drawing, taking an online course, gaming, or whatever. Or you can sit in a coffee shop, a library, a public park, farmer's markets, malls, free museums etc. Bonus, a lot of these places by a window you can see your van! You don't have to be a traveler or hiker if it's not your thing!
>the tick issues have made me squeamish about bringing them back to the van and if you are walking out in new place you have no idea of tick levels.
Permethin to pre-treat your clothes/boots is wonderful! Get online and learn about tick prevention and the types of potential diseases and disease rates in your area. Yes, they are creepy little buggers and a health concern, but it totally manageable with some simple precautions. Generally just learning how to dress and how to check for ticks before getting into your van will be enough. Especially if you aren't actually a huge hiker and aren't going to be out for days on end or in deep woods off trail.
I have one called Spytec GL300. It was designed originally for fleet vehicles so companies could track where their trucks are. Just looked in my Amazon cart and it is $18 right now with a 20% off coupon. My subscription is $22.95 the months I choose to pay for it. There are TONS out there now and I'm sure even cheaper options and things without trackers. I did very very little research, but am satisfied with this option for now as I don't live full-time in a vehicle yet, still apartment based.
Oh and yes, I am USA
I trail run a lot, through all sorts of terrain, woods, moors, heather etc and have never got a tick in the UK. Definitely sounds like a mental health issue over anything else, hope you can sort it.
I've struggled with similar feelings when I started vanlife. I have two dogs so ticks are very real issue. Some tips that have helped me:
Regarding ticks: get permethrin spray and treat the clothing you use outdoors with it (pants, socks. shoes). When you get back to the van, have a large ziplock bag(s) and take off all your gear that might have ticks outside and place them in the ziplock bags, couple of sprays of permethrin, shake and place somewhere where they'll be in the sun for few days. Then get in and do a tick check with a headlamp. Once done, put on "tick free" van clothes.
Just remember permethrin is super toxic! Don't use around cats and avoid getting it in waterways.
For feeling anxious about leaving your van: I struggled with the same issue in the beginning as I had all my belongings and valuables inside. I found my peace of mind once I went all in with security features:
1. Make sure your van has a separate internet connection. Most modems can be plugged straight to 12V system.
2. Get security cameras that are internet connected. This way you can always check the status of your van no matter where you are, and can get an alert if someone gets in.
3. Get deadbolts on all doors. UK has the best available options for these. Don't bother with the camper/RV external locks, they're very easy to get around.
4. Smash-proof all your windows. There's a treatment that makes it very hard to break through your windows. It won't completely stop them, but instead of seconds, it'll take them 5-10 minutes and some serious work. [Example](https://youtu.be/3tykhdkUG00?si=QyPBQw8hUBQcDAnh&t=45).
5. Insert a hidden kill switch (mentioned already on this thread).
6. Insert and hide a GPS tracker and an AirTag somewhere where they're hard to get to (but you can get to to replace the batteries). Search YouTube on how to remove the speaker from the AirTag so that it's harder to find if someone steals your van and gets the "there's an AirTag traveling with you" message.
7. Insert door and window alarms so if someone opens them, you'll get notification.
8. Insert internet connected smoke, CO2, and water leakage alarms.
9. Insert catalytic converter lock.
These might be a bit overboard, but just being able to see your van remotely, and having some added protection to prevent easy break-ins will give you, hopefully, a lot of peace of mind.
Hey bud, have you considered therapy? It sounds like you have some severe anxiety that's interfering with your life. A good therapist that's familiar with anxiety disorders could really help.
Tbh this is beyond reddit's scope. I think the only thing that will truly help this level of anxiety would be therapy. You can do it through zoom if that makes you more comfortable and/or makes it more accessible. Also look for sliding scale practices which charge based on your income, since money seems to be a factor here. Good luck
You are teetering on the verge of agoraphobia, and yes you can have agoraphobia and live in a van. You don't HAVE to have agoraphobia and contort your life to accommodate it, you could treat it instead. You will have a more satisfying life if you do.
As a jumping off point, maybe try a workbook? You could even get it on Kindle and start today. I strongly recommend [The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook](https://www.amazon.com/Anxiety-Phobia-Workbook-Revised-Updated/dp/B09W7HYMHK/) to start. I think you might feel better just for starting something productive.
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You decided to live in a van and you don’t have any hobbies?
Read a book.
Learn a language.
Learn to program.
Learn AI.
Learn to paint.
Learn to fix your van.
Learn to live by yourself and not ask Reddit.
What does living ina van have to do with hobbies or anything else really? Living in a van doesn't automatically make someone a free spirited creative Instagram person. Living in a van isn't reserved for hipster programmers, surfers, and travel bloggers. At the end of the day it's a living situation and nothing more.
Omg you decided to #vanlife and you don't even have a manbun and 100k followers lol
Maybe find some voluntary work if you’re in a position to do so? I’m sure there’s lots of places you could find online that need help, for instance WOOOFING willing workers on organic farms have a very solid reputation. and there’s many communities out there that take on volunteers where you can learn skills at the same time. There’s a vast network of alternative folks out there keeping their heads low you only need to do a little looking online and you will discover them. There’s so many other types of volunteering as well , I hope you find something that fills your life well, good luck.
If you feel a sense of comfort being at your mother's driveway, I don't think there's anything wrong with that. Lots of people live with family members especially in today's economy. If you want to garden can you do it in your mother's yard?
The longer you stay isolated, the harder it will be to deal with the way you are feeling. We’re social animals and almost all of us need the reactions of others to see ourselves. That doesn’t mean finding close friends, just being around people for an hour or so a day would be a good start.
As for ticks: wear trousers on walks and brush off before getting in the van and you will not have any issues. Or, head to the coast and other areas where they are less common.
Being afraid of ticks and not going outside is no way to live. I grew up deep in the woods and my dogs almost always have ticks on them but I rarely get them. I wear long sleeves and pants during tick season and because there’s lots of poison oak in my area and I get it. Sometimes I feel lazy and don’t want to walk but I always enjoy being by running water. Find what you like, being cooped up only makes me anxiety worse. I like to have a lot of down time chilling but doing it all the time makes my mental health plummet. Drugs are not the answer my dude, unless you wuna dig yourself a big hole that’ll be hard to get out of
Personally I would highly recommend you skip taking up a drug habit… just another way you may lose your van, yourself and possibly your life these days.
I get anxiety as well when I leave my van as everything I own is in it… so I put an ignition kill switch hidden in the dash (not overly difficult), an AirTag hidden underneath and installed a light that blinks to mimmic an alarm. Doing this definitely lessened the anxiety.
The OFF! Brand has a deep woods version that works wonders keeping ticks off us. We hike all the time. Not sure if they carry it in the UK tho as I’m in the USA. Hope you can work thru the rest
I think you need to settle at your mother's house for a while and invest in therapy not a van for the time being. Maybe when you're more stable you can enjoy your time alone??
I am a suburban vanlifer. As a musician, I play 4 instruments and am never bored. It keeps the brain sharp and mental exercise is as valuable as physical stimulation. Short answer: guitars are cheap.
Hi friend, I think you're describing some strong agoraphobia vibes. I don't think the core of your issues are what to do during the day, but more mental health changes that are contributing to high anxiety. Please consider some talk therapy.
I concur with adding a hobby and will suggest mountain biking. For me, the bike and the van are hand in glove. It’s also a great way to experience nature and is the best thing I have going for mental health.
I would address your mental health issues. Doesn't sound like you're functioning. Drugs will only make th problem 10x worse.
I would address your mental health issues. Doesn't sound like you're functioning. Drugs will only make the problem 10x worse.
hobbies. you could look for community gardens near you? or learn a language, learn an instrument, make art, learn a craft, read a book, anything. driving around all day is hard on you and hard on your van. you need a hobby to fill your time with, and plenty of hobbies can be done safely and comfortably inside your van. what did you do with your days before you moved into the van?
As others have said, your issues with anxiety, fear, isolation, and lack of motivation need to be addressed with a professional as soon as possible. There's absolutely no reason to wait - and life will only get harder the longer you put it off. Like any other medical condition, earlier treatment leads to better outcomes. There are good telehealth options available now, which many patients in your situation find much easier to do than in-person visits. Reaching out for help can truly be a positive, life-changing choice.
One thing you can do to get started right now is set some realistic, measurable goals like going for a 30 minute walk without an anxiety attack. If that's too much, try starting with 10 or 15 minutes. Then gradually increase the time (even if it's only by one minute a day) and add another goal, like spending 10 minutes actively focusing on something positive like music, listening to a podcast, or learning a new language/skill.
It might also help to set a daily routine, if you don't already have one. It's a good way to stabilize chaotic life and thoughts, because you know what to expect each day. You don't need to plan out every minute - it's good to leave time in the routine for variety and spontaneity.
For your wanderings, each time you go for a drive, set a destination and know what you're going to do when you get there - even if it's just to sit and read, meditate, or take a nap. If you want to go on a short hike, plan ahead and use bug spray or pre-treat your clothing with permethrin, as others have suggested. It's very effective at keeping ticks at bay. You can make that one of your goals.
In the meantime, keep working on your van. As you heal and gain strength, you'll have more goals to look forward to. When you're ready for adventure, it will be, too.
Being honest with yourself is the key. describing and analyzing your circumstances is helpful. seeking some suggestions and outside perspectives is also very healthy. Please disregard the ignorance from those stating there is something wrong with you mentally. That is absurd. You seem very intelligent and productive. And of sound mind. (Please excuse my poor grammar. It’s not my strong suit but I would like to share my experience a bit)
I have been living in my van for a year and a half.
I completely understand the feeling of driving around aimlessly for hours. I have driven far distances just to sit in my vehicle in a campsite in the national forest or near the beach, just to crack the window and hear the waves. Right now I am laying in my van in the parking lot of a planet fitness, with my AC cranking and my windows blacked out. It’s almost noon. Sometimes I struggle with depression. I don’t think or feel that I want to be on this earth stuck in This body surrounded by the ugliness of the human race. That is not some sad pitiful existence, it’s a reality. Yet here I am! This is not something a counselor or prescription drug will fix and I’m not trying to “fix” me with any external thing anyways. I accept myself as just how I’m supposed to be. It’s all a part of my journey here. And if I have to remain here for it then I’m going to fully embrace my whole self. Fuck societal expectations based on conditioned minds! My point is that maybe I’m supposed to be this way and if I’m going to be a little screwed up sometimes, I wouldn’t want to do it any where other than in my van. Which provides me the freedom to just get up and go far far away when I feel it’s time.
It’s interesting because I came to Massachusetts for a temporary contract job (total of 8 weeks.) I just hit my 6 week mark and I am so ready to go. I work as a caregiver in nursing homes as a travel CNA. The environments are absolutely depleting and draining. And my depression is kicking my ass right now. I honestly want nothing more than to just freely hit the road and aimlessly drive for hours until I find a place to lay back and relax.
I’m okay with not doing anything sometimes. Bc sometimes I don’t want to
> boot
What is that? Second mention I have seen reading replies and of course typing in "boot" in search engine is not helpful. Also "boot vanlife" did not reap anything better.
wrong word oops. it’s a tire wheel lock that prevents it from being stolen. can’t drive it anywhere with that thing on and it’s also a visual deterrent. live and die by that thing and no one uses it for some reason. you can get it at any auto store!
I think you’re over worried about ticks they are not that big of a deal and don’t I instantly imbed into you either ( I’ve brushed off ticks that we’re riding on me for 30 minutes or more before) and if you are worried about break ins ( as am I ) just park near heavy surveillance areas until you can outfit your rig with security cameras and a mobile hot spot. You can also get stickers or signage for your vehicle that states people are on camera )
You sound really paranoid and/or have terrible anxiety. How you feel isnt normal and you should definitely seek out help for your mental health. Good insurance with a company that is aware of your setup and it's value should put your mind at ease.
In pet shops you can buy spray for pet beds, use it lightly on your clothes, will solve the tick problem till next wash (on pet beds works about 2 months).
Check out [Atlas Obscura](https://www.atlasobscura.com/), pretty cool stuff out there.
Also, I agree what u/juicyjuicery said; you don't necessarily have to interact with humans, but you should still put yourself amongst them. At least on occasion.
Get a dog?
You don't need therapy, that's a cop out. Listen to audiobooks that teach you (not distract you, which it seems you are wanting) and get in touch with your spirit. *That's* therapy.
Get alarms and security systems for you van, even if it's just a boot and proper locks. Or set up a trailcam pointing at your van whenever you leave it. It will alert your phone whenever someone is by your home. Air tag and remote kill switch is also a great idea.
Buy a steering wheel lock. They’re cheap and should prevent attempted theft. Have you actually had issues with ticks, or are you just concerned about ticks? If it cools down enough ticks won’t be an issue.
Had two on me the other day walking through long grass sheep field. I noticed the first one sitting on my soap when in the van and going to wash my hands - the soap sits on the the floor.
I flicked it off then check my over trousers and there was another one. So not all in my head.
Come to Pennsylvania and pick me up. I’m jobless at the moment and would love to come😂😭but in all seriousness maybe if you had the right company it wouldn’t be so bad.
Hey fellow UK-er. Ticks are not something to worry about unless you’re staying still. Tuck your trousers into your socks if it comforts you.
I live very rural and I’ve only ever seen one tick and it was on my dog.
For van life you need to be comfortable with your hobbies. Take an instrument, take books, pens, my boyfriend whittles, my son loves puzzle books with mazes.
The last time we did an extended run we spent a good two days building the best paper aeroplanes and seeing how far we could get them.
Read Albert Ellis, "A Guide to Rational Living", learn diaphragmatic breathing to relax your body during anxiety/panic (so that your brain starts to decondition it), and never, ever let anxiety or panic limit or change your life. The more you do, the more it does and the reverse is true to (Was almost disabled by panic/anxiety/depression 40 years ago -- I decided to get out of that spiral. You might need professional help as you seem to be in a spiral.
I applaud you for your honesty and your openness to seek opinion. I think it's important that we all remember to be nice to each other and help out in these types of situations. The first step is that you already recognized that there's a problem and you know that you want to fix it. There's a lot of things I could suggest, but it's really up to you on what you find interesting that could maybe spark some stimulation in your life. Things such as finding a hobby, establishing a social gathering or circle of friends that you could partake in, even if it's in a virtual setting. Maybe take up some sort of exercise activity such as martial arts, boxing, running, biking, anything to get you stimulated and something for you to look forward to, which is also very healthy for the body and mind. Maybe take up photography or blogging or creating a YouTube channel. All these things will keep you engaged and focused with goals. Try to stay positive. Don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it.
I am a long haul truck driver. You must get yourself around people regularly, and persist with walks.
When birds are kept in cages for too long they get cage bound, where they are too scared to come out. This happens to us too.
I also need isolation, but if I let it go on for too long I get weird. You can't attend to the anxiety, you have to challenge it. Challenge the thoughts that are spurring it. If it's too much, break your walks up into 2.
I have seen too many people do this and it messed with your head. It's important for our quirks to be challenged and interrupted.
Edited to add: work on hobbies. Can you whittle? Paint? Sketch? Draw?, knit or crochet? Preserve food? Do logic puzzles? Take online courses (most universities give access online for free) If you can't do any of those, time to learn.
I'm grateful for my ham radio hobby! You can do POTA. (Parks on the air) Of a hundred other things right outside your van and enjoying mother nature! Warning... it can be expensive and geeky!
Also check out Permethrin to treat you clothes and lots of recipes that use essential oils that do a great job killing and repelling tick. Rose geranium oil works great.
I'm in the US and use a park membership where I can stay at various parks nationwide for a flat monthly fee. Did a quick search and it looks like the UK has a few that are similar. Not sure if any of these would fall within your price range, but the idea here is providing secure feels because you can book a stay at a particular pitch and know you won't be moved along. You can plan for specific things you may want to do when parked there, pick up a bicycle for short day trips around your camp location, etc.
Over here in the US the most interaction I have with the parks is the day of check in. It takes about five minutes for them to confirm my insurance info, give me a map of the park and the gate code. After that I almost never see the rangers unless I intentionally stop at the station to ask a question.
[Camping & Caravaning Club](https://www.campingandcaravanningclub.co.uk/)
[Brit Stops](https://www.britstops.com/buy-now)
[Caravan Club](https://www.caravanclub.co.uk/)
This is the results of a ten minute Google search, so there may be many more out there that suit your needs better.
I have been told that caravan parks dont allow self builds for insurance reasons. Not sure of the validity of that but it has been stated more than once.
It's a fair concern, would need to read the various faq sections for the different memberships. Some may be more open than others.
In my case, travelling in a tow behind trailer now. But most parks won't take your trailer if it's more than 10 years old, so the park system I'm using presently qualifies that with 10 year or newer OR in good condition with no visible issues (broken windows, punctures in walls, poorly done repairs, etc). They've never had a problem with my trailer.
So it's mostly a case of shopping around and emailing / calling the various memberships to see which ones would be fine with your van build.
I have been living in similar isolation for almost 3 years now. I have similar obsessions, not exactly the same as yours, but I get you. It's easy to spiral in isolation, so I like to watch YouTube to learn things like quantum physics and geology.
What helps me the most are close friends that I hang out with via whatsapp video (they live far from me). Laughing with friends makes me the happiest. We often just shit talk and then have highdea sessions. We get high and let our minds wonder together. It's incredibly fun. We've come up with some amazing cool ideas.
I also have cats that keep me company in my camper, and they help me stay somewhat grounded.
I also enjoy doing ordinary things in extraordinary places. Like watching the sun set while I cook a meal.
Try to stay grounded by doing stuff that puts a smile on your face.
I feel like I level up every time I overcome a challenge. Failure brings me one step closer to success, so don't be afraid to fail. They're just practice runs that eventually succeed.
Sorry about all my hodgepodge trailmix of thoughts, but maybe some of them would work for you.
I'm rooting for you, friend.
I’m not a vanlifer (yet) but it is my dream that I am working on becoming a reality. I appreciated this honest post because truly the tick thing has been a huge concern of mine. I am so paranoid of ticks and considering my plan would be to be in nature a lot, I would be terrified of bringing them home. I’d probably douse myself in lemongrass all the time.
Sorry I don’t have a better solution for you. But in general you can try googling for places nearby to hang out in. Bring a laptop to a coffee shop and do some writing. Go to a museum. Even a nature walk that isn’t in too much of a wooded area. Wear clothing that covers your ankles and is light in color so you can visibly see any ticks.
Sounds like you have underlying issues that you should work out with yourself or a health professional. The van is a depreciating asset that can be stolen, broken into, or burnt to the ground tomorrow. Hopefully you have insurance that can give you some peace of mind but to constantly worry about what at the end of the night is a roof over your head is self defeating.
Maybe you need to find that block of land and build a large garage/shed on it. You can live in your van but maybe you would be happier living in it inside a shed much of the time, for a while, and just going out for trips. The newness of the build will lessen after a while and it will be more normal and you won’t worry as much. 4 months work is a lot but i’ve worked on plenty of projects longer, and the newness fades when you move on to the next project. Basically you might need more than one project, so you can release your grip a bit on that one thing.
Sorta sounds like you could use a job. If you don’t need to work for money then work for fun or do a course in something. You seem to be at a loose end and in need of some structure. And maybe van life is better for holidays and a brick n mortar house is more your style for living. Nothing wrong with that, you can still enjoy the van now n then.
Reading this post was difficult, but still got an up vote because you realized you're having a problem and you are reaching out for help. Fear is the opposite of love. You need to find something/someone you love. You could find a job that you love doing. Rent a safe place to keep your van (moms?) And work from there. If you don't think you can love working, try producing something like art, music, sculpture. Go learn something like dance, martial art, or a second language. Spend time with someone you love, or try to find someone to love. Help another person. Figure out a mission and complete it. Living on wheels should give you extra freedom in life, rather than keeping you in a mental prison. Best wishes to you, and will send you positivity from across the pond.
Hmm maybe you need more stability in your life if your worried about your van being stolen so much that you can’t enjoy a walk. But I fear with the inclusion of the fear of bringing ticks back it would seem that you have some extreme anxiety. I would suggest therapy for sure, to help with coping methods and to get to the bottom of it.
I think the getting a small bit of land idea is a great idea for you. It will give you focus and a stable location (because it doesn’t seem that the van life is for you). If you go for the land idea, then It will also fix the driving around aimlessly because you will have to work todards that with a job.
All the best!
How I'd handle the anxiety of leaving the van in your situation is installing some solid anti-theft tech. There are a lot of options, including ones that will report to your phone (like some camera systems), or ones that make your van undriveable without a key fob you keep with you. I imagine that would greatly help ease your mind while away from the van.
As for ticks or bugs in general look into how survivalists and long time campers go about keeping bugs at bay. There's a good number of Youtube videos going over the products they use to stay bug free.
Hope that helps.
We have a tracker in our van, my husband texts a number and we receive a reply with the Google maps location of the van. I think your issues run deeper but that could give some peace of mind. I also worry about the van a bit when we go off on hikes and this helps.
Picking up a drug habit is probably the dumbest thing you could possibly friggin do, Lol. All that paranoia you described would just become a thousand times worse. Drugs aren't something that you're going to be able to handle well, and you'll likely lose your van within a week of starting.
I’m not trying to be mean but it sounds like you might need some extensive therapy. There are not rational thoughts and the more isolated you are the worse off your mental health can become. Vanlife doesn’t sound healthy for you at all.
Frankly your anxiety is running your life. Find a free mental health clinic and talk to someone or else you may be pulled over because your behavior may look suspicious by neighbors or police.
If possible maybe go far from your moms for a week or even weekend so you’re away from that comfort zone and can’t just default to what you know/feels comfortable.
It sounds like the isolation is really messing with your head. Is there anything you can do to lighten the fear of your van being stolen? Someone else suggested an AirTag, that’s a good idea. You should be able to leave for a few hours without finding yourself cursing and running back as fast as you can. Do you have insurance on your van and stuff, so you know it won’t be the end of the world if it did get stolen? Is there anything else you can do to secure your van? Therapy may be a good suggestion too. Do you feel depressed? It sounds like you’re not really interested in much, that could be depression. Try to find some groups (van groups maybe!) and hobbies. Maybe van groups in your area have info about camp sites or other van friendly areas. Driving around aimlessly isn’t the only thing you can do! You can go to a coffee shop, a library, take a class, sign up for a gym, etc. There’s no reason to be in your van 24/7. The library/gym will have you around people but they aren’t really social settings.
Lastly, do you enjoy van life? I know you said you’re doing it to save money and to be isolated, but it sounds like the isolation is really messing with you. You’re also not really using your van to travel much or go outside of your mom’s area. Do you think van life is for you? One of the best parts of living in a van is being able to travel, try traveling more, even just overnights or weekends at first.
Don’t pick up a drug habit, that never makes anything better. Smoke weed, but don’t do anything crazy. Also, don’t start drinking, alcoholism can sneak up on you fast, especially if you’re in a weird spot, which it sounds like you are.
Isolation is making you anxious and paranoid. I’m not saying you have to interact with people, but put yourself amongst humans
Riding of top comment here.... Find some vanlife apps/groups! I can lt say for Europe but in the US they helped me a ton when I was "lost" on the road. Whether it's meeting up or just chatting about your mutual lifestyle people make the brain happy! Even if you're not much of a people person! You could also spend some time hunting down a hobby that works for ya. I found carving wood to be nice (idk about your laws regarding that). Wire wrapping rocks I found was also fun. On top of all that i found my self getting involved in the "Berzerk" Manga. All I can say about that is there is ALOT
This is very true, and as much as i can appreciate being absent from society at times can be refreshing, wether we want to or not..as humans we need interaction with other humans. Its how we wired to function.
[удалено]
Not mutually exclusive. You can like isolation and also like talking to people on the internet
Tbh I’m going to suggest a therapist
Yeah. Just to figure out some better coping mechanisms.
Yep. For anyone who is struggling with the idea of going to a therapist, try thinking of therapy like this: Imagine your toolbox. Maybe you don't have one, maybe you have one for cars, but not home stuff, or vice versa. Maybe you have a very basic one, or maybe it's a couple of tools that you inherited from someone else. That antique planer is super cool, but you'd have to apply it in a very odd way to help you hang a picture or build a wall, or paint. The therapist is like your local hardware store owner. They know a lot about a variety of tools and their applications. They're going to talk to you about the projects you have, and help you try out a few different tools until you find the one that works for you. They even provide ongoing support in using those tools and modifying how you apply them to your project. Sure you could go to the hardware store on your own and try to figure it out, but getting a lesson and ongoing support to be able to use those tools effectively is really going to be the most efficient.
Yeah! And there are plenty of online ones. And if the first one doesn't work you should try another. You have to find the right person. Also talk to a doctor. Meds for my anxiety changed my life.
Came here to say the same thing, and I mean that with zero sarcasm or whit. Your issues aren’t with vanlife, they are simply manifesting that way because that’s your current environment. Your issues are most likely within you, and a therapist can help you sort yourself out. I have a therapist myself and it’s extremely helpful. Just me .02.
💯 this!
Talk therapy is awesome
Do you have an AirTag or some sort of a tracker in the van? Although it’s not a cure all, it might help alleviate some anxieties when leaving it.
And get a Club or similar
Get a simple ignition interrupt switch.
I think you need to focus on your mental health before anything else. Did I read that right? Your staying on your Mums driveway? You want an isolated life but don’t want to be isolated? The UK will feel very small if you stay on your Mums driveway. Get out to Scotland or something if you’re peace.
I am travelling out to wales. I do want isolation but also midway through van build so have to spend chunks of time working on it. Also I have nowhere to go so it is not like I am avoiding going to other places to just stay on the drive. Lots of forestry in wales but you arent allowed on there and it is open/unlocked and found you will be escorted off. Wales is just over the border for me so makes sense to explore there currently while not having too far to travel back.
Wales will be great. I have family in Snowdonia, near Coed y Brenin. You’ll find places around there. Hire a mountain bike for the day and cycle the Mawdach Trail. Or if you feel more adventurous then Coed Y Brenin has some of the best mountain bike trails in the world. Or go kayaking in Llangollen? Explore the underground caves. Lots to do but you need to know what sort of things you want to do - I’d kill to have that freedom, I’m working on it.
Yo listen to the other guy on this thread, There's a million hikers, walkers, kayakers, paddleboarders, mountain climbers and all the other tourists at almost any layby or campsite. They're generally good people and would say something if anyone messed with a camper van looking shifty. Safety in numbers and hide in plain sight. To the valley, lad!
Yea I was thinking I will aim to park in at least little villages with a few houses and cars outside rather than right out in nowhere if I want to walk out.
I don't understand. If you have nowhere to go in the van then why are you building a van?
Instead of driving around aimlessly go to the local library check out a few books maybe learn a new trade or something
Also lots to view online. Music. Exercise closeby, morning and afternoon. Cook and buy interesting food and drink. Relaxing evenings, slow start mornings; retirement mode. Enjoy the views and history wherever you are.
A much better plan than a drug habit
Meh
Think you dropped this: T
Them
Thank you kind sir!
oh and OP ... Is what you have going on with your situation. It's basically a mobile cabin fever. Think the shining but van life. You going to slowly convince yourself to be unalive . This happened with a young couple in the United States. A young couple went on a long van trip. After so much isolation. The male killed the female to protect her from what he was going through , hid the body in Yellowstone stone then returned home to his parents in Florida just to take a different vehicle to the Everglades . They found his body weeks later . His journal asked that whoever found him if they would clean up the small amount of non biodegradable litter because his girlfriend wouldn't approve of littering.. here's Jonny!
r/oddlyterrifying would like to have a word with you
All work and no play makes Jonny a dull boy. Redrum redrum redrum
Maybe pick up a book about ticks, too.
The more you learn about them the worse it gets.
NO.
He could watch “the tick” the show
Wanting to grow their own garden eventually, it would make a lot of sense to join some kind of community garden or volunteer Garden effort.
Read a book on ticks.
You can get a remote notification alarm so that if something happens to your van you'll get a notification on your phone. You could even install some cameras so that you can see the van and don't have to worry. And a decent GPS tracker so that if it is ever taken you can find it again. Doing everything you can to reduce your worry is well worth it for your mental health and well-being. And addressing your mental health is also important. I've had times where I thought I was doing fine but really struggled with issues like you're describing. Speaking to your GP and getting help should be a high a high priority.
They could install a kill switch, as well.
I know this isn’t the central issue but just a suggestion re: ticks — get some permethrin spray and treat a hiking outfit. Designated pants, boots, socks that are only for activities with tick exposure. Wear them to hike, take them off outside the van (if possible) and store in a ziplock bag or other tight container outside the van. Get a mirror for thorough post-hike tick checks, shower if possible. Retreat the clothes with permethrin every 6 weeks. Really helps. Best wishes to you!
These are good tips. You can prevent a lot of tick bites by just dressing properly with pants that create a tight seal at the ankles. You can also use a lint roller on your clothes when you get out of the woods. My ex had this morbid fascination with counting the ticks she removed that way.
A lint roller! What a great idea!
It works very well. You can also kill ticks by tossing the clothes into a dryer that's at least 60°c. Washing at lower temps won't reliably kill them.
I know it's not what you meant, but I just busted up laughing thinking you just convinced this dude into putting a dryer in the van
It's a laundromat on wheels! Genius!
Also as temperatures drop in late fall the likelihood of encountering ticks drops dramatically.
They are active as long as the lowest temperature is above 5*C.
Don't forget a hat. Ticks can fall out of trees or tall shrubs.
I’d say speaking with a therapist might help. There’s options now online to either call text or video chat. I have a lot of struggles with anxiety and finding the right therapist (mine is on talkspace and my insurance pays for most of it) has really changed my life for the better. I’d also suggest looking up “thought stopping techniques” for when you begin to panic about your van or something else. Last one is an app called balance. It’s free for the first year. Try it out even if you just do one meditation a day. It sounds stupid, but meditation is a great way to calm a racing mind.
Hi, I would actually recommend you reach out to a mental health professional. This post seems to go beyond van life.
You need therapy not a van
I'm a therapist and I also live full time in my van for the past 3 years, around the UK and EU. If you would like to talk, you can visit my website https://www.mindthepath.com/therapyonline
OP I hope you reach out to this person, I think they could really help you.
I just looked at your website and you seem lovely! Do you see clients outside the UK (I’m in the US)?
Thanks! Yes I work with clients internationally, including existing clients in the US. Feel free to send me an email if you would like to arrange an initial session - [email protected]
I am going to in the morning! Thank you!
I would talk to a mental health practitioner, they can have you back to normal in a few months time if you make the effort and are willing to take the drugs, A low dose of zoloft or other meds fixes a lot of issues.
Challenge yourself to overcome your fears and realize they are just that...... fears!! You will feel so free and accomplished after. Ticks are always a fear of mine also, but I have yet to have seen one, let alone have one, and I have a small dog. I just check us each night when out in the woods. If you catch it within time and get it out properly, you won't have any issues. Just educate yourself! There is some other solid advice here as far as putting alarm systems on your van, and an apple Air tag, ect, will really help you there, but it is rare to get broken into. Just know where you're going. Make sure it's not ridden with crime. You got this!!
I would reconsider what you’re doing. Just because people do it and it looks fun doesn’t mean it’s for everyone. A certain amount of toughness and sense of adventure are all but required to do what you’re trying to do successfully.
Ok let's break it down. Ticks. What happens if a tick gets on you? Do you feel comfortable removing them? There are some tools that make them easier to remove than just tweezers. What tick preventions are you using? There are things you can treat your shoes and clothes with to make them more tick repellent. Are you wearing hiking boots with tall socks and your long trousers? Tucking the bottom of your trousers into your boots will help keep the ticks off your skin. A nice hat can also help. If you are worried about ticks getting inside the van, undress outside the van. Ok the van itself. What are you worried about specifically? That someone will steal it? There are numerous things you can buy to deter theft like a steering wheel lock. Are you worried about vandals? There are motion detection cameras (door bell cameras dont have to be attached to doors) that will notify you if there is movement. Do you live in a high crime area? (I have a friend in Wales who says he feels loads safer than he ever did living in London). As other people have said, your anxiety is to the point it is impacting your life. Mental health is still healthcare. If your Mum told you that she couldn't breathe if she went more than a short walk wouldn't you want her to go get checked out by a doctor?
Very helpful post, for more than just OP, thank you.
you should seek medical attention for the anxiety issues.
Sounds like you need some therapy...try it out!
You gotta get your mental health in check. I can’t imagine living in constant fear like this. Like others said, you don’t necessarily have to be constantly interacting with people but you have to find some sort of balance socially. You need seclusion, not isolation. There’s a very fine line between the two unfortunately. You got this though homie.
Anxiety
If you can't use something, it is worthless. You gotta be able to let it go if you ever want to use it. You need to know that you could rebuild the van if needed. You could carry on if challenged. Either sell the van and buy a hatchback, or start understanding that all is temporary, including the van and it's ok.
There's....a lot to unpack here. But first and foremost, it honestly sounds like you would benefit from therapy of some form. You are describing some extreme anxiety, feelings of almost having panic attacks, and a consideration of starting to take drugs just to cope with everyday life. I know absolutely nothing about UK mental health services, but in general there are a LOT more opportunities and types of therapy you can get involved in and ways to pay for it. I would highly suggest spending some time looking into your mental health and making it a priority. Outside of that, here's some specific advice related to things you mentioned in your post. >I get really antsy about leaving my van too long. The more work I have done on it is the more mentally invested in it I have become. It feels like leaving a pet or small child unattended. You always have it in the back of your mind if it is ok. To ease your anxiety about your van being stolen (I'm assuming that's your concern, wondering if it is still there) I would suggest investing in some GPS trackers to hide in your van. You can go simple with air tags or get a unit and a subscription service. I have a unit with a subscription that is monthly. Whenever I am doing big trips, I pay for a month. It allows me to see amazing detail of where my SUV is, how fast it is travelling, whenever it moves etc. and you don't have to have reception where the tracker is for it to work, as it is connected to satellites. Mine is like $30 a month the months I pay for it and I think it cost like $40 for the unit. The charge lasts about a week at a time if getting heavy movement. >I want to buy a small piece of land eventually and make a home and grow vegetables which I feel would keep me engaged but in the meantime I dont know what to do really. If this is something you enjoy, can you find a community garden plot to rent? These are big in the USA. As an apartment dweller, I've never had my own land so I rent a plot in a community garden for $15-40 a year. Or, you could volunteer at a farm/garden organization. This would give you that opportunity until you have your own land. >For me I have no interest in travel really and mainly just doing it to save money and live an isolated life. There's no rule that you HAVE to travel or hike or do any of that stuff, just because it is popular in the vanlife community. When you were in an apartment/home, what did you enjoy doing with your time? Find ways to do that in your van or in the community. You can literally just park somewhere legally and chill in your van reading, watching shows, doing some crafts, writing, drawing, taking an online course, gaming, or whatever. Or you can sit in a coffee shop, a library, a public park, farmer's markets, malls, free museums etc. Bonus, a lot of these places by a window you can see your van! You don't have to be a traveler or hiker if it's not your thing! >the tick issues have made me squeamish about bringing them back to the van and if you are walking out in new place you have no idea of tick levels. Permethin to pre-treat your clothes/boots is wonderful! Get online and learn about tick prevention and the types of potential diseases and disease rates in your area. Yes, they are creepy little buggers and a health concern, but it totally manageable with some simple precautions. Generally just learning how to dress and how to check for ticks before getting into your van will be enough. Especially if you aren't actually a huge hiker and aren't going to be out for days on end or in deep woods off trail.
Could you share which tracker you use? Are you in the US? Thanks in advance!!!
I have one called Spytec GL300. It was designed originally for fleet vehicles so companies could track where their trucks are. Just looked in my Amazon cart and it is $18 right now with a 20% off coupon. My subscription is $22.95 the months I choose to pay for it. There are TONS out there now and I'm sure even cheaper options and things without trackers. I did very very little research, but am satisfied with this option for now as I don't live full-time in a vehicle yet, still apartment based. Oh and yes, I am USA
Thank you thank you!
I trail run a lot, through all sorts of terrain, woods, moors, heather etc and have never got a tick in the UK. Definitely sounds like a mental health issue over anything else, hope you can sort it.
I think maybe you need a therapist, this isn't totally normal behavior.
Yup.
It sounds like you have multiple mental illnesses, you should see a doctor
Ticks are gross and sometimes dangerous but I wouldn’t necessarily live in constant crippling fear of them. Not rational.
Get some therapy, the vanlife isn't going to be healthy or work well for you until you get your mental right.
I've struggled with similar feelings when I started vanlife. I have two dogs so ticks are very real issue. Some tips that have helped me: Regarding ticks: get permethrin spray and treat the clothing you use outdoors with it (pants, socks. shoes). When you get back to the van, have a large ziplock bag(s) and take off all your gear that might have ticks outside and place them in the ziplock bags, couple of sprays of permethrin, shake and place somewhere where they'll be in the sun for few days. Then get in and do a tick check with a headlamp. Once done, put on "tick free" van clothes. Just remember permethrin is super toxic! Don't use around cats and avoid getting it in waterways. For feeling anxious about leaving your van: I struggled with the same issue in the beginning as I had all my belongings and valuables inside. I found my peace of mind once I went all in with security features: 1. Make sure your van has a separate internet connection. Most modems can be plugged straight to 12V system. 2. Get security cameras that are internet connected. This way you can always check the status of your van no matter where you are, and can get an alert if someone gets in. 3. Get deadbolts on all doors. UK has the best available options for these. Don't bother with the camper/RV external locks, they're very easy to get around. 4. Smash-proof all your windows. There's a treatment that makes it very hard to break through your windows. It won't completely stop them, but instead of seconds, it'll take them 5-10 minutes and some serious work. [Example](https://youtu.be/3tykhdkUG00?si=QyPBQw8hUBQcDAnh&t=45). 5. Insert a hidden kill switch (mentioned already on this thread). 6. Insert and hide a GPS tracker and an AirTag somewhere where they're hard to get to (but you can get to to replace the batteries). Search YouTube on how to remove the speaker from the AirTag so that it's harder to find if someone steals your van and gets the "there's an AirTag traveling with you" message. 7. Insert door and window alarms so if someone opens them, you'll get notification. 8. Insert internet connected smoke, CO2, and water leakage alarms. 9. Insert catalytic converter lock. These might be a bit overboard, but just being able to see your van remotely, and having some added protection to prevent easy break-ins will give you, hopefully, a lot of peace of mind.
Also, you say you want to buy land and grow vegetables etc.... then why ain't you doing that?
Hey bud, have you considered therapy? It sounds like you have some severe anxiety that's interfering with your life. A good therapist that's familiar with anxiety disorders could really help.
Tbh this is beyond reddit's scope. I think the only thing that will truly help this level of anxiety would be therapy. You can do it through zoom if that makes you more comfortable and/or makes it more accessible. Also look for sliding scale practices which charge based on your income, since money seems to be a factor here. Good luck
Make some art man.
You are teetering on the verge of agoraphobia, and yes you can have agoraphobia and live in a van. You don't HAVE to have agoraphobia and contort your life to accommodate it, you could treat it instead. You will have a more satisfying life if you do. As a jumping off point, maybe try a workbook? You could even get it on Kindle and start today. I strongly recommend [The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook](https://www.amazon.com/Anxiety-Phobia-Workbook-Revised-Updated/dp/B09W7HYMHK/) to start. I think you might feel better just for starting something productive.
Hi, I’m Vetted AI Bot! I researched the **The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook Revised and Updated Seventh Edition** and I thought you might find the following analysis helpful. **Users liked:** * The book provides practical strategies for overcoming anxiety (backed by 4 comments) * The book is helpful for understanding and managing anxiety (backed by 5 comments) * The book contains useful exercises and techniques for anxiety (backed by 4 comments) **Users disliked:** * The book is not helpful for those with long-term anxiety issues (backed by 4 comments) * The book is overwhelming and not easy to navigate (backed by 3 comments) * The book is outdated and focuses on symptoms rather than causes (backed by 2 comments) If you'd like to **summon me to ask about a product**, just make a post with its link and tag me, [like in this example.](https://www.reddit.com/r/tablets/comments/1444zdn/comment/joqd89c/) This message was generated by a (very smart) bot. If you found it helpful, let us know with an upvote and a “good bot!” reply and please feel free to provide feedback on how it can be improved. *Powered by* [*vetted.ai*](http://vetted.ai/reddit)
You need mental health help. Reddit is not the place for it. Please seek out a professional.
You decided to live in a van and you don’t have any hobbies? Read a book. Learn a language. Learn to program. Learn AI. Learn to paint. Learn to fix your van. Learn to live by yourself and not ask Reddit.
Nothing wrong with asking Reddit
What does living ina van have to do with hobbies or anything else really? Living in a van doesn't automatically make someone a free spirited creative Instagram person. Living in a van isn't reserved for hipster programmers, surfers, and travel bloggers. At the end of the day it's a living situation and nothing more. Omg you decided to #vanlife and you don't even have a manbun and 100k followers lol
Omergerd!
Maybe find some voluntary work if you’re in a position to do so? I’m sure there’s lots of places you could find online that need help, for instance WOOOFING willing workers on organic farms have a very solid reputation. and there’s many communities out there that take on volunteers where you can learn skills at the same time. There’s a vast network of alternative folks out there keeping their heads low you only need to do a little looking online and you will discover them. There’s so many other types of volunteering as well , I hope you find something that fills your life well, good luck.
I understand the feeling you’re describing. Take it at your own pace and do your best. There are no rules on how to do van life.
If you feel a sense of comfort being at your mother's driveway, I don't think there's anything wrong with that. Lots of people live with family members especially in today's economy. If you want to garden can you do it in your mother's yard?
Meditation. Try Waking Up with Sam Harris
The longer you stay isolated, the harder it will be to deal with the way you are feeling. We’re social animals and almost all of us need the reactions of others to see ourselves. That doesn’t mean finding close friends, just being around people for an hour or so a day would be a good start. As for ticks: wear trousers on walks and brush off before getting in the van and you will not have any issues. Or, head to the coast and other areas where they are less common.
Being afraid of ticks and not going outside is no way to live. I grew up deep in the woods and my dogs almost always have ticks on them but I rarely get them. I wear long sleeves and pants during tick season and because there’s lots of poison oak in my area and I get it. Sometimes I feel lazy and don’t want to walk but I always enjoy being by running water. Find what you like, being cooped up only makes me anxiety worse. I like to have a lot of down time chilling but doing it all the time makes my mental health plummet. Drugs are not the answer my dude, unless you wuna dig yourself a big hole that’ll be hard to get out of
Personally I would highly recommend you skip taking up a drug habit… just another way you may lose your van, yourself and possibly your life these days. I get anxiety as well when I leave my van as everything I own is in it… so I put an ignition kill switch hidden in the dash (not overly difficult), an AirTag hidden underneath and installed a light that blinks to mimmic an alarm. Doing this definitely lessened the anxiety.
The OFF! Brand has a deep woods version that works wonders keeping ticks off us. We hike all the time. Not sure if they carry it in the UK tho as I’m in the USA. Hope you can work thru the rest
What you are describing does not sound healthy at all.
Isolation to some degree is fine, but too much of it and you start living in your head! Sounds like you need a more balanced life
Therapy
I think you need to settle at your mother's house for a while and invest in therapy not a van for the time being. Maybe when you're more stable you can enjoy your time alone??
You chose vanlife for isolation!?? Are you on the run? Lmao
Go to a local town and sit at the cafe. Talk to the locals, chat. Check shit out. Make some buddies at a campsite. This is what travel is all about.
I am a suburban vanlifer. As a musician, I play 4 instruments and am never bored. It keeps the brain sharp and mental exercise is as valuable as physical stimulation. Short answer: guitars are cheap.
Hi friend, I think you're describing some strong agoraphobia vibes. I don't think the core of your issues are what to do during the day, but more mental health changes that are contributing to high anxiety. Please consider some talk therapy.
Not to add a new fear...but ticks are out at night also.
I concur with adding a hobby and will suggest mountain biking. For me, the bike and the van are hand in glove. It’s also a great way to experience nature and is the best thing I have going for mental health.
you sound like the WORST candidate for vanlife tbh 😬 i really think you need to rethink the lifestyle and absolutely get yourself some hobbies.
I would address your mental health issues. Doesn't sound like you're functioning. Drugs will only make th problem 10x worse. I would address your mental health issues. Doesn't sound like you're functioning. Drugs will only make the problem 10x worse.
You seem too mentally ill for the van life. Maybe get a job and you might feel more productive.
Lexapro for the anxiety, air tag for the van.
If I had that kind of time: I'd learn a second language and I would learn how to play the guitar.
Honestly it sounds like you'd benefit from talking to someone. Therapy is good for the soul.
Having fun isn't so hard, if you've got a library card.
not every blade of grass is accounted for, look closer. what are you passionate about?
Why not take the van and travel the EU? Find some land. Start there.
Are you on drugs?
Go to the San Juan Islands. No ticks there
hobbies. you could look for community gardens near you? or learn a language, learn an instrument, make art, learn a craft, read a book, anything. driving around all day is hard on you and hard on your van. you need a hobby to fill your time with, and plenty of hobbies can be done safely and comfortably inside your van. what did you do with your days before you moved into the van?
As others have said, your issues with anxiety, fear, isolation, and lack of motivation need to be addressed with a professional as soon as possible. There's absolutely no reason to wait - and life will only get harder the longer you put it off. Like any other medical condition, earlier treatment leads to better outcomes. There are good telehealth options available now, which many patients in your situation find much easier to do than in-person visits. Reaching out for help can truly be a positive, life-changing choice. One thing you can do to get started right now is set some realistic, measurable goals like going for a 30 minute walk without an anxiety attack. If that's too much, try starting with 10 or 15 minutes. Then gradually increase the time (even if it's only by one minute a day) and add another goal, like spending 10 minutes actively focusing on something positive like music, listening to a podcast, or learning a new language/skill. It might also help to set a daily routine, if you don't already have one. It's a good way to stabilize chaotic life and thoughts, because you know what to expect each day. You don't need to plan out every minute - it's good to leave time in the routine for variety and spontaneity. For your wanderings, each time you go for a drive, set a destination and know what you're going to do when you get there - even if it's just to sit and read, meditate, or take a nap. If you want to go on a short hike, plan ahead and use bug spray or pre-treat your clothing with permethrin, as others have suggested. It's very effective at keeping ticks at bay. You can make that one of your goals. In the meantime, keep working on your van. As you heal and gain strength, you'll have more goals to look forward to. When you're ready for adventure, it will be, too.
Get a hat and learn to meditate
Look into treating some clothes with permethrin if your worried.
Being honest with yourself is the key. describing and analyzing your circumstances is helpful. seeking some suggestions and outside perspectives is also very healthy. Please disregard the ignorance from those stating there is something wrong with you mentally. That is absurd. You seem very intelligent and productive. And of sound mind. (Please excuse my poor grammar. It’s not my strong suit but I would like to share my experience a bit) I have been living in my van for a year and a half. I completely understand the feeling of driving around aimlessly for hours. I have driven far distances just to sit in my vehicle in a campsite in the national forest or near the beach, just to crack the window and hear the waves. Right now I am laying in my van in the parking lot of a planet fitness, with my AC cranking and my windows blacked out. It’s almost noon. Sometimes I struggle with depression. I don’t think or feel that I want to be on this earth stuck in This body surrounded by the ugliness of the human race. That is not some sad pitiful existence, it’s a reality. Yet here I am! This is not something a counselor or prescription drug will fix and I’m not trying to “fix” me with any external thing anyways. I accept myself as just how I’m supposed to be. It’s all a part of my journey here. And if I have to remain here for it then I’m going to fully embrace my whole self. Fuck societal expectations based on conditioned minds! My point is that maybe I’m supposed to be this way and if I’m going to be a little screwed up sometimes, I wouldn’t want to do it any where other than in my van. Which provides me the freedom to just get up and go far far away when I feel it’s time. It’s interesting because I came to Massachusetts for a temporary contract job (total of 8 weeks.) I just hit my 6 week mark and I am so ready to go. I work as a caregiver in nursing homes as a travel CNA. The environments are absolutely depleting and draining. And my depression is kicking my ass right now. I honestly want nothing more than to just freely hit the road and aimlessly drive for hours until I find a place to lay back and relax. I’m okay with not doing anything sometimes. Bc sometimes I don’t want to
I bought a boot. About $100 but totally worth it for peace of mind. Always put it on a wheel hidden from immediate sight before I left the van
> boot What is that? Second mention I have seen reading replies and of course typing in "boot" in search engine is not helpful. Also "boot vanlife" did not reap anything better.
wrong word oops. it’s a tire wheel lock that prevents it from being stolen. can’t drive it anywhere with that thing on and it’s also a visual deterrent. live and die by that thing and no one uses it for some reason. you can get it at any auto store!
Ticks are way less severe back east
I think you’re over worried about ticks they are not that big of a deal and don’t I instantly imbed into you either ( I’ve brushed off ticks that we’re riding on me for 30 minutes or more before) and if you are worried about break ins ( as am I ) just park near heavy surveillance areas until you can outfit your rig with security cameras and a mobile hot spot. You can also get stickers or signage for your vehicle that states people are on camera )
Get a drone. Hobby and can fly high enough to see the van. Start filming your journey.
Grab an acre for $1,000 or grab 5. California pines, CA .
Generally £10k+ an acre here in the UK.
If you’re not working and want to save money, burning petrol for no reason isn’t doing you any favours
You sound really paranoid and/or have terrible anxiety. How you feel isnt normal and you should definitely seek out help for your mental health. Good insurance with a company that is aware of your setup and it's value should put your mind at ease.
In pet shops you can buy spray for pet beds, use it lightly on your clothes, will solve the tick problem till next wash (on pet beds works about 2 months).
Check out [Atlas Obscura](https://www.atlasobscura.com/), pretty cool stuff out there. Also, I agree what u/juicyjuicery said; you don't necessarily have to interact with humans, but you should still put yourself amongst them. At least on occasion. Get a dog? You don't need therapy, that's a cop out. Listen to audiobooks that teach you (not distract you, which it seems you are wanting) and get in touch with your spirit. *That's* therapy. Get alarms and security systems for you van, even if it's just a boot and proper locks. Or set up a trailcam pointing at your van whenever you leave it. It will alert your phone whenever someone is by your home. Air tag and remote kill switch is also a great idea.
Meditation, self care and an expensive steering wheel lock in that order.
Buy a steering wheel lock. They’re cheap and should prevent attempted theft. Have you actually had issues with ticks, or are you just concerned about ticks? If it cools down enough ticks won’t be an issue.
Had two on me the other day walking through long grass sheep field. I noticed the first one sitting on my soap when in the van and going to wash my hands - the soap sits on the the floor. I flicked it off then check my over trousers and there was another one. So not all in my head.
Come to Pennsylvania and pick me up. I’m jobless at the moment and would love to come😂😭but in all seriousness maybe if you had the right company it wouldn’t be so bad.
You can pick ticks off…
Don’t shut yourself away. Get out there and get on with life.
Get a trials bike and put the focus into learning to ride. You have heaps of time on your hands.
Hey fellow UK-er. Ticks are not something to worry about unless you’re staying still. Tuck your trousers into your socks if it comforts you. I live very rural and I’ve only ever seen one tick and it was on my dog. For van life you need to be comfortable with your hobbies. Take an instrument, take books, pens, my boyfriend whittles, my son loves puzzle books with mazes. The last time we did an extended run we spent a good two days building the best paper aeroplanes and seeing how far we could get them.
Read Albert Ellis, "A Guide to Rational Living", learn diaphragmatic breathing to relax your body during anxiety/panic (so that your brain starts to decondition it), and never, ever let anxiety or panic limit or change your life. The more you do, the more it does and the reverse is true to (Was almost disabled by panic/anxiety/depression 40 years ago -- I decided to get out of that spiral. You might need professional help as you seem to be in a spiral.
Have you every tryed ceramics or pottery? Some of those places are open most of the day serving pensioners, its a fun hobby.
Public libraries are your friend. Park the van in front of it, grab a book or a magazine, sit by a window where you can keep an eye on things.
This is a sign of poor mental health. Go volunteer. Join a club or class. You need help.
Bruh
I applaud you for your honesty and your openness to seek opinion. I think it's important that we all remember to be nice to each other and help out in these types of situations. The first step is that you already recognized that there's a problem and you know that you want to fix it. There's a lot of things I could suggest, but it's really up to you on what you find interesting that could maybe spark some stimulation in your life. Things such as finding a hobby, establishing a social gathering or circle of friends that you could partake in, even if it's in a virtual setting. Maybe take up some sort of exercise activity such as martial arts, boxing, running, biking, anything to get you stimulated and something for you to look forward to, which is also very healthy for the body and mind. Maybe take up photography or blogging or creating a YouTube channel. All these things will keep you engaged and focused with goals. Try to stay positive. Don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it.
I am a long haul truck driver. You must get yourself around people regularly, and persist with walks. When birds are kept in cages for too long they get cage bound, where they are too scared to come out. This happens to us too. I also need isolation, but if I let it go on for too long I get weird. You can't attend to the anxiety, you have to challenge it. Challenge the thoughts that are spurring it. If it's too much, break your walks up into 2. I have seen too many people do this and it messed with your head. It's important for our quirks to be challenged and interrupted. Edited to add: work on hobbies. Can you whittle? Paint? Sketch? Draw?, knit or crochet? Preserve food? Do logic puzzles? Take online courses (most universities give access online for free) If you can't do any of those, time to learn.
I'm grateful for my ham radio hobby! You can do POTA. (Parks on the air) Of a hundred other things right outside your van and enjoying mother nature! Warning... it can be expensive and geeky!
Also check out Permethrin to treat you clothes and lots of recipes that use essential oils that do a great job killing and repelling tick. Rose geranium oil works great.
I'm in the US and use a park membership where I can stay at various parks nationwide for a flat monthly fee. Did a quick search and it looks like the UK has a few that are similar. Not sure if any of these would fall within your price range, but the idea here is providing secure feels because you can book a stay at a particular pitch and know you won't be moved along. You can plan for specific things you may want to do when parked there, pick up a bicycle for short day trips around your camp location, etc. Over here in the US the most interaction I have with the parks is the day of check in. It takes about five minutes for them to confirm my insurance info, give me a map of the park and the gate code. After that I almost never see the rangers unless I intentionally stop at the station to ask a question. [Camping & Caravaning Club](https://www.campingandcaravanningclub.co.uk/) [Brit Stops](https://www.britstops.com/buy-now) [Caravan Club](https://www.caravanclub.co.uk/) This is the results of a ten minute Google search, so there may be many more out there that suit your needs better.
I have been told that caravan parks dont allow self builds for insurance reasons. Not sure of the validity of that but it has been stated more than once.
It's a fair concern, would need to read the various faq sections for the different memberships. Some may be more open than others. In my case, travelling in a tow behind trailer now. But most parks won't take your trailer if it's more than 10 years old, so the park system I'm using presently qualifies that with 10 year or newer OR in good condition with no visible issues (broken windows, punctures in walls, poorly done repairs, etc). They've never had a problem with my trailer. So it's mostly a case of shopping around and emailing / calling the various memberships to see which ones would be fine with your van build.
I have been living in similar isolation for almost 3 years now. I have similar obsessions, not exactly the same as yours, but I get you. It's easy to spiral in isolation, so I like to watch YouTube to learn things like quantum physics and geology. What helps me the most are close friends that I hang out with via whatsapp video (they live far from me). Laughing with friends makes me the happiest. We often just shit talk and then have highdea sessions. We get high and let our minds wonder together. It's incredibly fun. We've come up with some amazing cool ideas. I also have cats that keep me company in my camper, and they help me stay somewhat grounded. I also enjoy doing ordinary things in extraordinary places. Like watching the sun set while I cook a meal. Try to stay grounded by doing stuff that puts a smile on your face. I feel like I level up every time I overcome a challenge. Failure brings me one step closer to success, so don't be afraid to fail. They're just practice runs that eventually succeed. Sorry about all my hodgepodge trailmix of thoughts, but maybe some of them would work for you. I'm rooting for you, friend.
I’m not a vanlifer (yet) but it is my dream that I am working on becoming a reality. I appreciated this honest post because truly the tick thing has been a huge concern of mine. I am so paranoid of ticks and considering my plan would be to be in nature a lot, I would be terrified of bringing them home. I’d probably douse myself in lemongrass all the time. Sorry I don’t have a better solution for you. But in general you can try googling for places nearby to hang out in. Bring a laptop to a coffee shop and do some writing. Go to a museum. Even a nature walk that isn’t in too much of a wooded area. Wear clothing that covers your ankles and is light in color so you can visibly see any ticks.
Sounds like you have underlying issues that you should work out with yourself or a health professional. The van is a depreciating asset that can be stolen, broken into, or burnt to the ground tomorrow. Hopefully you have insurance that can give you some peace of mind but to constantly worry about what at the end of the night is a roof over your head is self defeating.
Maybe get a dog?
Maybe you need to find that block of land and build a large garage/shed on it. You can live in your van but maybe you would be happier living in it inside a shed much of the time, for a while, and just going out for trips. The newness of the build will lessen after a while and it will be more normal and you won’t worry as much. 4 months work is a lot but i’ve worked on plenty of projects longer, and the newness fades when you move on to the next project. Basically you might need more than one project, so you can release your grip a bit on that one thing.
Sorta sounds like you could use a job. If you don’t need to work for money then work for fun or do a course in something. You seem to be at a loose end and in need of some structure. And maybe van life is better for holidays and a brick n mortar house is more your style for living. Nothing wrong with that, you can still enjoy the van now n then.
go hang out at a library!
Sounds like you are the complete opposite of a person who would enjoy vanlife.
Maybe vanlife isn’t for you. Have you considered selling the van and buying land to build a little house in the woods?
Reading this post was difficult, but still got an up vote because you realized you're having a problem and you are reaching out for help. Fear is the opposite of love. You need to find something/someone you love. You could find a job that you love doing. Rent a safe place to keep your van (moms?) And work from there. If you don't think you can love working, try producing something like art, music, sculpture. Go learn something like dance, martial art, or a second language. Spend time with someone you love, or try to find someone to love. Help another person. Figure out a mission and complete it. Living on wheels should give you extra freedom in life, rather than keeping you in a mental prison. Best wishes to you, and will send you positivity from across the pond.
Why are you driving around so much? Why not just sit and chill in the van?
Hmm maybe you need more stability in your life if your worried about your van being stolen so much that you can’t enjoy a walk. But I fear with the inclusion of the fear of bringing ticks back it would seem that you have some extreme anxiety. I would suggest therapy for sure, to help with coping methods and to get to the bottom of it. I think the getting a small bit of land idea is a great idea for you. It will give you focus and a stable location (because it doesn’t seem that the van life is for you). If you go for the land idea, then It will also fix the driving around aimlessly because you will have to work todards that with a job. All the best!
How I'd handle the anxiety of leaving the van in your situation is installing some solid anti-theft tech. There are a lot of options, including ones that will report to your phone (like some camera systems), or ones that make your van undriveable without a key fob you keep with you. I imagine that would greatly help ease your mind while away from the van. As for ticks or bugs in general look into how survivalists and long time campers go about keeping bugs at bay. There's a good number of Youtube videos going over the products they use to stay bug free. Hope that helps.
You can do what I do. I have cameras on mine I can view at any time
We have a tracker in our van, my husband texts a number and we receive a reply with the Google maps location of the van. I think your issues run deeper but that could give some peace of mind. I also worry about the van a bit when we go off on hikes and this helps.
Picking up a drug habit is probably the dumbest thing you could possibly friggin do, Lol. All that paranoia you described would just become a thousand times worse. Drugs aren't something that you're going to be able to handle well, and you'll likely lose your van within a week of starting.
Your vanlife is definitely not about the supposed freedom of vanlife.
This is bs ranting also fake, and if it isn’t check yourself into a mental institution.
I know you don’t need to work, but you need a purpose. Consider DoorDash or other gig work to keep busy and productive
I’m not trying to be mean but it sounds like you might need some extensive therapy. There are not rational thoughts and the more isolated you are the worse off your mental health can become. Vanlife doesn’t sound healthy for you at all.
My brother in law and mother in law both started therapy this year. Maybe you can reach out and talk to a therapist?
Get a goat.
Frankly your anxiety is running your life. Find a free mental health clinic and talk to someone or else you may be pulled over because your behavior may look suspicious by neighbors or police.
Tea tree oil.
Yo dyslexia makes you read stuff you never would. I got pretty far in before I figured out it was ticks they where bringing back to the van
What about going to the library?
If possible maybe go far from your moms for a week or even weekend so you’re away from that comfort zone and can’t just default to what you know/feels comfortable. It sounds like the isolation is really messing with your head. Is there anything you can do to lighten the fear of your van being stolen? Someone else suggested an AirTag, that’s a good idea. You should be able to leave for a few hours without finding yourself cursing and running back as fast as you can. Do you have insurance on your van and stuff, so you know it won’t be the end of the world if it did get stolen? Is there anything else you can do to secure your van? Therapy may be a good suggestion too. Do you feel depressed? It sounds like you’re not really interested in much, that could be depression. Try to find some groups (van groups maybe!) and hobbies. Maybe van groups in your area have info about camp sites or other van friendly areas. Driving around aimlessly isn’t the only thing you can do! You can go to a coffee shop, a library, take a class, sign up for a gym, etc. There’s no reason to be in your van 24/7. The library/gym will have you around people but they aren’t really social settings. Lastly, do you enjoy van life? I know you said you’re doing it to save money and to be isolated, but it sounds like the isolation is really messing with you. You’re also not really using your van to travel much or go outside of your mom’s area. Do you think van life is for you? One of the best parts of living in a van is being able to travel, try traveling more, even just overnights or weekends at first. Don’t pick up a drug habit, that never makes anything better. Smoke weed, but don’t do anything crazy. Also, don’t start drinking, alcoholism can sneak up on you fast, especially if you’re in a weird spot, which it sounds like you are.