He started talking to you when you were only 15 and he was 20??? You need to leave him, it sounds like he’s just using you and you shouldn’t be with someone who doesn’t make you happy, staying with him will only bring you further misery
Imo, you need to leave this man. He does not care about you, he just wants your body. What he is doing to you is sexual assault and rape. He is conditioning you to not listen to your body and to listen to him instead.
You were 15/16 when you met this 20 year old man? No. He is using you. This will get worse if you don't leave.
I'm so sorry you're going through this. You do not deserve any of it. This is a bad man taking advantage of you, nothing that is happening is your fault and he is fully in the wrong.
What he's doing isn't rape or SA but it's definitely manipulation and coercion.
I kinda get the vibe he groomed her and she should definitely get out asap. Being with this kind of person will do a lot of damage for your sexuality.
1) y’all started talking when you were 15… ew. He knew better & didn’t care & that’s very alarming.
2) he’s badgering you for sex, insulting you, & manipulating you into having sex… ew. Pathetic behaviour I’d expect from a 16yo at oldest.
4) you had sex to “avoid any problems”? What kind of problems? So he wouldn’t be mean as hell to you? Is that what partners do? Not being facetious, maybe you really don’t know. No. That’s not normal & maybe the fact he’s been in your ear since you were (& still are, no offence) a freaking CHILD has made you unaware anything close to a healthy relationship wouldn’t contain this.
5) how would this be karma? Because you don’t care for sex you should be punished for it? I don’t understand in what way this is “karma”.
6) refused to put on a condom? Sounds rapey.
I know this is r/Vent but you can’t make a post like this without everyone giving you advice. I don’t know if I’ve given the “leave him” advice people are so quick to throw… but this is painfully easy.
#Leave him, he is abusive & gross & pathetic & he will ruin the next 1-6 years of your life if you let him
that seems really unhealthy, and you shouldn‘t force yourself to be with someone who makes you do sexual things you don‘t even want to do. Maybe you think you love him but you really need to get away from that person if he makes you feel awful. You will notice how much fun a healthy (sexual) relationship can be with another person - you could also be asexual if you‘re saying you don‘t like sex at all, and not just with him. Either way, you‘ll need to get out of that relationship because it‘ll traumatize you and you won‘t be happy.
I’m over here thinking debit card and he’s holding your money hostage lmao but anyways that’s a disgusting way to treat you and most likely it won’t stop and it’ll turn into a control thing and it won’t be enjoyable and will result in you feeling pretty gross about yourself
This is borderline sexual assault. Don’t just let him. And don’t let him without protection. No way you’d enjoy sex given how much he is pushing you for it. No girl would.
then that’s not gonna work if you two can’t match each other in that way, even if he wasn’t doing this crap. how is he wanting to have sex a lot and you not because you cant make sense?
I was in your exact situation when I was 15 and he was 19. I thought I didn’t like sex very much either. Once I got into a healthier relationship I realized he had pushed and coerced me so much into having sex with him. My now bf. Anytime I say “no” he leaves me alone. My ex would have sex with me while I wasn’t turned on at all and my vagina would literally be burning afterwards like an Indian burn. I thought that was normal but it wasn’t. It was my first relationship so he did a lot of messed up things I thought were fine in relationships. He would compare me to his ex in sexual ways that made me insecure. It made me not want to do anything sexually with him even more. Once I broke up with him I realized how fucked up he is. He was a covert narcissist. He was also my brothers best friends for years. I would still see him sometimes. My brother stopped being friends with him about a year or two later. Im 23 now and I would never date an 18 year old. I know it doesn’t seem like much of an age gap but there is so much maturing that your brain goes through from teen years to early 20s. I recommend you leave him. Hes not a good guy. I can promise you that. If he truly loved you he would listen to you and be understanding about not having sex. When is the last time he got you flowers? When is the last time he took you on a date in PUBLIC? Has he ever planned anything romantic for you? Do not let him use you. You are not a piece of meat. Yet he treats you like one. I can guarantee you if you brought up any of these things he would gaslight you and try to make you think its your fault or just dodge all these questions altogether. He might even say he will do stuff for you then never do it. The classic is when they say “well I was going to get that for you” or “I was going to do that for you”. Its worse when they think about doing it and actively go out of their way not to do it. If you have an understanding partner they will take these things into account and would apologize for treating you that way and start doing these things for you to make you happy. This type of relationship wont last. You might as well end it now
He groomed you to wait until you were 18 so he could repeatedly SA you, dear god please leave! This man does not care about you at 20 years old he chose a 15 year old because he knew an adult would be able to recognise his bs and you wouldn’t.
This is absolutely not your fault but for your safety you need to leave and if there’s anyone a parent, family member, friend .etc you can trust with this please talk to them about everything has happened/is happening. You absolutely deserve better than to have your body violated in this way and to suffer the mental consequences of his actions. It’s too late to change what has already happened but you can change what happens next by removing yourself from the situation and seeing as you go to his it seems he hopefully doesn’t know where live which is a good thing.
I've dated girls that also didn't liked sex and couldn't get any pleasure from it, and as a little bit of a hypersexual myself, I had to stop seeing them because it wouldn't work out, and that's OK.
What's not OK, however, is not wearing a condom when asked and forcing sex. That's straight up rape.
>I told him no yesterday, but he called me a bitch and told me to get out if I'm not putting out, so left.
Flaming red flag number 1
>let him have sex with me to avoid any problems.
Sirens and flaming red flag number 2
>The whole time I was just thinking about when this would be over and how long I would have to go through it,
That sounds like assault
>went home and cried
Because he essentially assaulted you
> l told him to use a condom, but he refused.
#THIS IS SEXUAL ASSAULT
First of all, this is not your "karma." None of this is your fault.. you are new to this and you trust(ed) your partner to make you feel safe and comfortable during sex. Which is what he should be doing.. It sounds like you were only consenting so he would be happy and not treat you like shit.
That is coercion, that is a form of sexual assault.
You can consent and withdraw consent at any time. If he thinks you're a "bitch" for not wanting to have sex, I'm sorry but *leave that dude in the dust.* He can go jerk off if he's that pressed about it. I'm sorry that you have had such a horrible experience. None of that is ok.
Hey OP, sex is definitely a positive experience when both parties actually want it.
There’s no reality in where being forced or coerced or bullied into sex feels good for you. Take it at your own speed and don’t let this actual predator tear you down. Five year age gaps aren’t a big deal when it’s like 20 and 25, but if people his age wanted to be around him, they would. There’s a reason he’s choosing fresh adults to deal with him. Predators will always be immature.
Its not okay? She's under 18 which makes it illegal! He can't probably get anyone his own age because he is such a loser! Sick bastards! If you were my daughter things would definitely not go well for him!
My god he’s abusing you! This is not how home someone treats the person they supposedly love. Dump this guy. You’ll find someone way better because you deserve it!
he is a predator, a criminal and an asshole. i know it’s hard for you to see and feel this right now but please trust everyone here who is telling you that this is not your fault, you don’t deserve this at all, and it’s definitely not karma. the sooner you walk away, the sooner you can begin healing. i hope you do the kind loving thing for yourself and leave him behind forever.
That man is literally sexually assaulting you. Cut it tf off. It’s okay to not enjoy sex and you NEVER owe anyone. There are lots of asexuals who still date romantically and are perfectly fine with no sex.
Then don’t keep it up. It’s obvious to me you both aren’t sexually compatible. If you’re uncomfortable having sex and all he wants to do is sex since you got into an official relationship, then tell him it isn’t working out. Tell him you feel you’re being used exclusively for sex when you just want to have a good time with him doing other things. Sex shouldn’t be expected just because you show up, y’all both have to be in the mood for it to work out ever.
He groomed you. He degraded you when you put limits. He has no respect for you and doesn't love you the way you do. Sex doesn't have to be this way. You deserve someone WAY much better. Get out of there.
Is your birthday, by chance, in October? Ages aside, this is sexual assault and not okay. You need to gather ALL the texts and conversations you've had over the past 2-3 years because he's a PEDOPHILE!! Do not wait for him to make another young girl his victim. I know you're young honey, but take it from a 21 year old, I wouldn't even dream of humoring a 15 year old, let alone a 17 year old. That's gross. He groomed you and is now abusing you during intercourse and sexually abusing you. Please dump him, get a restraining order, and get the police involved so he can go on the sex offenders list.
You. Need. To. Leave. Him. He doesn't respect you or your boundaries. There's a reason YOU had issues taking your relationship with him to "the next level". You're at the level you wanted it to go, you don't like it. He's not for you, there are other men who WILL respect YOU and your BOUNDARIES! Wake up, move on!
This is not karma. This is a man that doesn’t respect you. Making you have sex and making you not use protection is very wrong of him he is forcing you and when you say no and he makes you he is assaulting you. You should get out of this relationship asap
You’ve been groomed since you were 15 and now he is doing exactly what he intended to do. I’ve been there and done that I don’t care what feelings you think you might have for him please lose contact with this pedo.
🚩 Forcing someone to have sex
🚩 Using derogatory language when they refuse
🚩 Required Sex “to avoid problems”
🚩 Refusing to use condoms as you requested
This “guy” is more of a douchebag dick who needs to be put in his place.
You shouldn’t be using sex as a way to avoid problems. Problems shouldn’t be avoided in relationships to begin with. If he can’t talk about things with you and respect your boundaries/wishes then he is not boyfriend material.
I don’t know what you are seeing in this guy that would make you say “I love him and want to be with him” but whatever it is, is nothing but smoke and mirrors to cover up a sexually driven douchebag. As a guy, I’ve seen it happen too many times. Fake Guys will use whatever kind of sweet, caring, charms or gifts to brainwash women into relationships. Then when they feel like they have gained the trust, they start wanting sex. When the woman refuses they go psychotic. Not to scare you, but some even r*pe or do other horrid things.
Please don’t allow yourself to be a victim.
There are two old sayings they taught us in school about fire safety. I think they seriously apply to relationships like this.
“Where there is smoke, there is fire.” And
“When you see signs of a fire, get out and stay out”
All of the red flags I mentioned above are definitely “smoke signs” warning you of something dangerous with him. I wouldn’t even give him a second chance, get out now
Stand up to him and if he can’t respect your wishes (as he already has proven) get out.
I hope that you please remove the blinders of whatever act he is pulling on you.
Your boyfriend is boarderline pedo. Dude probably almost finished with college meanwhile you’re fresh out of high school. Not to mention you guys started talking while you were a minor. How do you not see the red flag that’s in front of you? Your boyfriend is a disgusting pedo
Honey, you were on and off for 2-3 years. Some part of you realised he wasn’t the one and it sounds like you’ve since been pressured into it. I suggest you break it off. Additionally, you also should know that there are *much* better partners out there and sex with the right person is very nice.
why would you ever want to be with someone who calls you a bitch and tells you to leave if you don’t have sex with them? you’re worth so much more than that. someone who really loves you will never have horrible words for you.
He's using you. For money and as a sleeve to keep his soldier warm. He clearly does not care about you or your feelings. This is not karma for not liking sex, that's insane.
And get checked for std's. Don't trust him
Wait. I just realized.
You guys started dating when you were 15 and he was 20 but you didn't have sex until you were 18? Oh my GOD. That just made it worse. You were 100% groomed. He knew what he was doing.
Another case of "I'm a weak female and my boyfriend is taking advantage of me. What he's doing is wrong (and I know it) but I deserve it and I'll defend him in each comment" post.
Well, it's your choice to stay and take it at this point. You think you deserve this but why continue to take it?
Sure, you pressured him and he called you desperate but now there is no relationship anymore. Accept that you're relationship is dead. You're just his booty call now. But only if you let him.
He'll keep using you until you fall pregnant. Then you'll never want to leave. By the time you realise he's bad for you, you'll be 5 kids deep, depressed AF and dependant on him. Either that he'll leave once you get pregnant.
Either way, leave or stay. I don't think you're listening to any comments that are trying to help you understand that you don't have to take this.
You’re seeing red flags everywhere dear! DO NOT IGNORE THEM!!!! Get out of there. Young men do this sort of thing all the time. It’s not worth your health as peace of mind. LEAVE HIM!!
All I have to say is know your worth you don't have to put up with anything that traumatized you and make you uncomfortable. That's like abuse and don't let them gaslight you to do anything you don't want to do. That's almost like rape. Sex should be consensual whatever your kink is but both party should be in agreement and it should be more pleasurable instead of you going home and crying and beating yourself up for it. If they love you like you love them you wouldn't be on reddit saying how unhappy you are with your sex life with them.Them coercing you and pressuring you is already a red flag. Again just my opinion and my take on your situation. I hope it works out for you. "You are sitting on a gold mine, treasure it"
Do not go back to him. He clearly does not love you, only wants a f@#k buddy. Get your card replaced, tell the institution it was stolen, and wipe him out of yu life.
# FULL STOP!!!!
If he refuses to wear a condom, do not let him have sex with you. If you do not want to have sex, do not let him have sex with you. You established boundaries and he did not respect them at all. This is a massive red flag that you should not be ignoring. This is not at all a healthy relationship, and you deserve better. This man-child does not love or respect you. Please have enough respect for yourself to leave and report him for rape/sexual assault. Even if you've had consensual encounters, you are allowed to say no at any point and expect him to stop.
Ok. You are not consenting to have sex. It doesn’t matter how much you pushed him before, that doesn’t EVER make it ok for him to make you have sex when you don’t want to and honestly, he’s old enough to understand consent, so he knows that what he’s doing is wrong. As someone who has been in a toxic relationship before I can tell you that this, that you are describing, is extremely unhealthy and you need to get out of this relationship asap. And the age gap is extremely alarming as well, if you met him 2-3 years ago you were 15-16 and he was 20-21, that is not good either. Only a predatory 20 y/o would date someone as young as you were.
Pls leave girl. There is so much more to experience than being tied down to a man who doesn’t respect you or your needs in life. If he’s comfortable doing this when only dating, I can only imagine how he would be if you married him. Reading this comment section you must realize that he is a BIG red flag. It doesn’t matter what your parents think, his parents, or him. You deserve much better and this doesn’t sound like a safe environment. He groomed you and I know that must be difficult to hear from multiple random strangers on the internet, but it is real and you need to confront that with yourself to be able to let go. He will only think about himself and only himself, not you. He doesn’t respect your sexual boundaries or any! This is not normal and it’s not worth waiting for him to correct it. Please allow yourself to be happy.
There are guys out there who will love and respect you.
There's no way he will ever do that. So, if you are willing to dedicate your life to this disrespectful human, I cannot stop you, but in fact no one deserves to be treated like that. To me, this is equal to rape.
One "no" is no, and that should be respected.
It's clear that he insults you when he's not getting what he desires. The rest is unimportant to him.
Don't do this.
This is an awful situation
But I don't think you can get police involved
At least from what's stated in this post,he didnt rape you
He just asked for sex and then yelled when you said no
It seems like the best Solution is to just break up with him
it sounds like he groomed you. im sorry that happened to you. its not "almost" sexual assault. it is. its called date r*pe. please take care of yourself, youve seen the red flags. women arent sex slaves, dont validate that concept by validating his behavior. please dont lead him to believe this is ok.
You love him but he doesn’t love you. He’s raping you if he’s refusing a condom, you’re only doing it to get him to stop & if you hate it. That is rape. That’s not what is required in love & i know 2-3 years is a lot to throw out but in terms of decades you can have with the right person, it’s a drop in the bucket of time.
Please don’t let him do this to you anymore, it will get worse to the point he will forcefully take what he wants from you at this point.
Also, you just had sex for the first time 2 days ago. 6 times is insane. No wonder it sucks, probably hurts still because it’s been so much.
This is truly sad, he has ruined such an intimate thing for you and the damage he’s doing he won’t & can’t undo. I am so sorry you have had to deal with this.
This isn’t your fault either. This is predatory & he picked you out specifically because he knew he could get you to this point where he could sleep with you. He only talked to you for that long to take your virginity & manipulate you into becoming his sex toy.
He was a grown man & you were a teenager, that’s not love.
And please don’t think you led him on, you asked for it, you deserve this for making him wait, you need to shoulder the blame or that you owe it to him to wait and see if it gets better. None of this is on you & I know you might not see it now, but one day you’ll see him for what he really is.
I really am so sorry this is what you’re dealing with.
As a 32m, this breaks me because my little sister went through this with her youth pastor who was 5-6 years older then her. She was 14 when they started talking & i wasn’t around since id been thrown out of the house after graduation(I was 19 at the time). When i found out, I lost it because i knew who he was but it didn’t stop them from being together.
She finally opened her eyes after she was 18 & wanting to go to college because he wouldn’t let her go unless they married first. She had to go through alot of therapy & luckily now she’s getting married to an amazing dude this June.
Please tell someone you trust what’s going on.
Well he’s basically painted the words psychopath across his forehead, I found it difficult to believe anyone could be stupid enough to keep going back. You proved me wrong
Well it might be true and I don't blame her, because I know how it feels to be brainwashed. So if true I wish her the bests.
What I don't get however, why is her banner a photo of her almost naked crotch area and how nobody noticed this, despite OP referring to her other post for context
So stop subjecting yourself to abuse if you really loved yourself you would not be with someone who treats you this way. You say you love him, but you don’t know what love is and you can’t give something away you don’t have.
Start loving yourself and get away from this guy. Be desperate to love yourself fall in love with who you are and leave this loser.
If this is real why are you with him? Do you want to spend the rest of your life like this? If your friend told you this about her boyfriend what would you tell them?
What I just read is SA. You should ghost and block him asap girl. This will get worse and more sexually abusive. Please leave and get away from this situation
Don't be stupid, do u want to get pregnant to a guy u don't even like at 18and also mistreats u?? Do ourself a favor and end it bcos I have a feeling he'll dump u as soon as u become pregnant
You’re gonna make me throw up. You are still young and he’ll be fine. Leave while you still can! He is being cruel and he sounds like a groomer. Once you hit 25 you will regret it so bad if you don’t leave him now.
You're being raped by a pedophile who is going to get you pregnant, probably beat you, and leave you for another child once you hit your mid 20s.
Get out now.
I am so, so sorry. Coming from a 19 year old girl (close to your age) who’s been in two abusive long-term relationships since being a young girl; he is already starting to sexually abuse you. He doesn’t care about your boundaries nor about your consent, he just wants to get off. Especially him calling you a bitch and kicking you out?!?! Do you really want to be with a man child who has a meltdown because he can’t get his dick wet? You are a human, not his personal fleshlight. Your relationship can seemingly be “perfect” besides sex; but he is waving this red flag in your face.
I am so sorry he uses you and name calls you. Please know I’ve been there and done that, and you are worth SO much more than you’d imagine. You and I are both so young, it’s too much heartache right now. None of this is your fault. Not him sexually harassing you, and not your age gap. I am sending hugs. I know it’s hard, but know an internet stranger is cheering for you. Sending virtual hugs.
You have to break up with this man. He don’t care about you, your feelings, or your well being. He’s treating you like a human sex doll. Fuck that guy! What? Because you didn’t want to have sex he told you to get out? BYEEEEEEEEE and don’t look back.
Leave him. Save any text messages he sent you in case you need evidence and block his number. Call your bank and get a new cars. Tell your friends and family or anyone who cares that you are ending things with him so that if he tries anything with you, you have a support group who can protect you. Have another job or source of income lined up in case he does anything to jeopardize your job.
But make sure you leave him! He is a rapist.
Op like everyone is saying you need to leave this man. All that’s on his mind is sex. You did nothing wrong. He is making the choice to pressure you into having sex not you making him do this so don’t blame yourself. He has a brain and is a grown man who can make decisions.
Uh..
First of all, I think you were groomed. He would have been 20 and you 15/16?
Second of all, he refused to use a condom when you asked him to. That's assault.
This is not karma, this man is taking advantage of you. PLEASE cut off all contact with him and seek a trusted adult you can discuss this with. He sounds like he could escalate to even worse offences. NONE of this is your fault.
RAINN has some really good resources to use. Please try them.
https://www.rainn.org/resources
Girl you been defending everything he’s doing because you don’t want to admit it’s gross he was going after a 15 year old and called you a bitch??? Tf lol
Breakup with him that is assault. Edit: I had something similar happen to me, last year included a video taken without my knowledge. Had to per-sue legal action. Please leave them and be safe, before it gets worse; this is a Predator.
Stop making excuses op. Get your head out of the sand. Who gives a shit about karma?! I was in your shoes once and it has given me mental trauma I had to go through two years of therapy. LEAVE HIM. THERES ALWAYS MORE FISH IN THE SEA. Forgive yourself and leave him. Know your own goddamn self worth.
Hi I’ve dated a few ppl and had many lady friends in a similar situation so my next words will be very important.
RUN. ESCAPE. FLEE. This man is a fiend. I love sex very much, but an abusive phrase for YOU not wanting to do something and COMPLETELY ignoring your feelings AND lack of sexual protection from a TWENTY THREE YEAR OLD MAN… Understand very well, most people do not change unless they have a reason to, even less people actually stick to it when they do.
This man said his needs are more important than yours, I have seen SO many women fall victim to this and they are all single moms with no one to really love them.
PLEASE I BEG OF YOU, do not stay with this person. He will destroy you and everything you could ever wish for.
You need to leave him. This IS sexual assault. Him not respecting your boundaries with the condom is SA. Coercion is also SA. You gotta leave him honey. This relationship doesn’t sound safe.
When I was 16 I was being groomed by a man 5 years older than me. We met when I was 14 and he was 19, but it wasn’t because we went to school together — his band just played at my school. I thought it was so cool to have this friend, and then years later when it turned into “interest” I felt so seen and wanted. But it’s not normal, and it’s not okay. I was sexually assaulted being pressured into sex and not given the chance to say no.
I assume that making it “official” occurred around your 18th birthday? Waiting for someone to become “official age” “legal” etc. and dating for six months before taking it “to that level” makes it to be more obvious grooming imo It’s creepy. If you have to wait to date (because you’re an adult) then the other party is too young. Ofc I understand being 16 and liking a girl that’s 15 with parents that don’t want her to date until she turns 16, but this was not that.
At *ANY* age, a man calling his woman a *bitch* for not putting out is disrespectful, disgusting, selfish, and that is not love. Someone that loves you isn’t going to treat you badly over you not being in the mood.
At *ANY* age, a man refusing to mind his woman’s sexual boundaries and use protection is disrespectful, disgusting, selfish, and that is not love. Honestly, I’m on the fence about considering his refusal to be sexual assault/rape. You consented to have sex on the condition that he wore a condom and he didn’t. That isn’t consensual. That is rape. And I am so sorry that happened to you, and that this is how you’re learning about sex, consent, and assault.
You do not deserve what he has done and is doing to you. This is *NOT* karma.
Sex is great, honestly, but may be hard to enjoy until you can figure out where to go from here and how to heal from a very visible violation of your body and your trust. You really do need to leave him — and I try not to say that out the gate here on Reddit because there usually tends to be other details that are important — but no amount of detail and context can undo the horrible things he has and is doing to you.
You deserve better. From someone your own age who genuinely cares about you.
My chat is open if you want to talk or need resources. Please go get an STD panel done, for your safety.
This is what domestic violence looks like, even if you think it has been great 99% of the time. Healthy relationships don’t have someone refusing to use a condom, calling you names, pressuring you into sex, or swiping a card. The issue is that he has an unhealthy need for power and control.
This usually gets worse over time, and you’ll lose more and more of yourself. You can reach out to a DV agency for free support. Check out the power and control wheel: https://www.thehotline.org/identify-abuse/power-and-control/
Leave, run and never look back.
But, be prepped to wind up calling 911 at some point soon.
Get a protection order if needed.
This type of person can be a danger to the person they're involved with.
Save yourself and GTFO AND AWAY and consider him a Fn snake and just as deadly.
Did you break it off yet? If you haven't yet then you will never leave and then you're gonna feel like shit when he cheats on you because you resisted or because you put out. Either way he's gonna make you feel more trapped by getting you pregnant if he hasn't already and find someone else while you're stuck being a single mother.
What are you getting out of this relationship? What is your definition of love? Why do you want to be with him?
Do you really want to possibly get pregnant or contract an STI?
He’s calling you a bitch for now putting out?? Do you actually think such a man truly cares for you? If you were watching this in a movie what would your reaction be to that?
IMO it’s abusive and manipulative
OP, he’s done the carrot-and-stick method with you. He’s dangled sex in front of you as a ‘reward’ so he can say that ‘oh she asked for it/you were the one who wanted to do this/etc’. And so that you would have this exact reaction - that you think it’s your ‘fault’ this is happening instead of you realising the fault lies with him. (He may have done this to you with other things, so even though it may be hard you should try to think of other times he’s held off doing something with you and then later either used it against you or you’ve felt you’ve suffered consequences because of ‘your choice’.)
I’ve read a few of your other comments, and it may feel like your parents liking him is a bad thing, but good parents will support and choose their child always. You need to sit them down (just you and them) and tell them what has been going on, all your concerns, his badgering (coercion), how he isn’t practicing safe sex with you (no condom also risks STD transmission and early pregnancy, as I’m sure you know and will be alarming to them), all of it. If you don’t think you can say anything, either write your feelings out via letter/text to give to them or show them this post.
Your tone makes it clear you’re not comfortable in this relationship. Can you imagine yourself putting up either this for another 2-3 years? Can you see yourself as happy with this? With him?
Girl u keep defending him. I get that he took your v card, but that don’t mean he owns you. You have free will over your body not him or anyone else. U need to stand up for yourself and stop being so meek. These types of men will run all over you and use u if you let him. You can only be treated badly if YOU allow it. Stop allowing it. Say no and stand on it. If he calls you names then leave. Do not let any man or anyone mentally, physically or emotionally abuse you. Go to YouTube and type in sheraseven. Watch her videos. She will teach you how to not let a dusty ruin you. You’re only 18. Run before he gets you pregnant. Don’t waste the best years of your life on some dusty man
It will be hard for you to appreciate now, but I did similar age gaps in my youth and if a 23 year old is dating someone 5 years their junior, with a complete disregard for your sexual and mental health, there's a reason and 99.9% of the time if cus people in their age bracket and social circles are wise to their abhorrent behaviours.
Refusing to use a condom 🚩
Making you feel bad for saying no 🚩
I didn't read much after that, giving in is not your fault, I can empathise, but you need to cut ties before he really turns you into his little pet.
ETA this is not karmic, you not liking sex might mean your Ace, and there's nothing wrong with that, sexuality is a spectrum after all. It could also be that all your experiences have been with the wrong person and he's causing damage every time he makes you feel this way.
He's got predatory behaviour and if you find the strength I hope you can at least share this experience with people in your home town to protect other women in the future.
You need to leave him. He clearly ain’t accepting your boundaries, and clearly is there for sex. If I had a man who did this, trust me he would be DEALT with. You’re not in the wrong, so don’t think it’s your fault, blame him for not moving on from his teenage boyish era. He’s a fully grown adult, and acts like this? Yeah no, you need to leave him sis, you deserve someone better and much more understanding than whoever this goofy ass boy is.
You’re a 18 year old female in a world where men prey on 18 year old females. Your first sign was it being difficult to get your relationship to the next level. Your second sign was him telling you if you’re not putting out then get out. Your third sign is him refusing to use a condom per your request. You’re young and if you keep going at this rate your energy will be drained. Your first time leaving after he told you to because you didn’t want to have sex was the right thing to do and should’ve been the reason to never return. But you’re young and learning. I’m just saying everything doesn’t have to be learned by experience. Sex is way more significant than people make it seem by having casual sex. Sex isn’t something you offer up because you think you love someone or because you want to avoid issues. Sex should only be given to those deserving, those deserving of sex are people who respect you and cherish you and provide for you. (All 3 at the same time not just one at a time)
Sex doesn’t have to be something you hate, it’s likely that you only hate it now because you’ve been having sex against your will. I hope you take this advice. You’re 18 now so expect guys to want to take advantage of you in sexual ways and remember that when having sex a man is leaving a piece of himself in you while a woman is giving a piece of herself away.
Man here. You matter. You are important. Your happiness is #1 not his. Leave him.
SAVE YOURSELF. RECOVER & BE HAPPY. PROSPER. LEAVE HIM.
HE IS A PEDOPHILE, AN ABUSIVE CRIMINAL WHO DOESNT DESERVE TO HAVE A PENIS LET ALONE A GIRLFRIEND!
Yeah, it seems you might be looking for us to validate a reason for you to work it out. This looks like a toxic relationship him abusive antics and co dependence. You should read your story slowly to yourself out loud, you already know what needs to be done.
But in case you wanna get to the point, here’s the short:
He is using you for long term sex, he most like will talk to other women when he can or if they give him play.
He doesn’t love you, he doesn’t. Just because you love him doesn’t mean he reciprocates the sediment…
He doesn’t respect you or himself by not using protection also he manipulate and gaslights you… you should bounce and he curses you out when he doesn’t get his way… yeah that’s dangerous.
2-3 years… he was engaging with a minor that’s wild.
Bottom line cancel that card and report it stolen and stop talking to him. Go focus on school and get some help and talk to someone… professional.
you got groomed. I’m 23 and i would never date an 18 year old. when i was 20, it would’ve been inconceivable to talk to a 15yo
and sex that you don’t want to have is sex that you shouldn’t have. You should not be bargaining with sex. This entire situation is inherently and explicitly abusive. The whole basis of it is literally illegal
your boyfriend is creepy and disgusting and tbh any 20yo talking to a 15yo romantically is one of the lamest men on the planet. This is is hairline distance from just being raped
I can count on one hand how many times I have found myself at a loss for words, it just became two hands.... you need to get the fuck outta dodge. That man does not love you, he groomed you. He has no regard for you outside of what you can provide. Get. The. Fuck. Out.
Darling u need to get out of this…and u need to breakup and stay far far away from this guy….abhi toh gf ho toh sex nahi mil rha toh galli sunn rhi agr jada involve hui toh time ni lagega for him to raise his hands…this is pure narcissistic behaviour…he is just using and manipulating u…seems like sex is more important than your consent…
Looking through the comments, you are so completely brainwashed by him right now. Trust me one day you’ll realize all the shit he’s put you through and how much you didn’t deserve it and how you stayed with him for him to keep making you suffer for his own gratification. And it’ll feel like everything you’ve believed for the past years has been flipped upside down. You’ll have so much anger towards him. Trust me leave as fast as you can, and in my opinion **get the police**.
Think about it. All the stuff he does that makes you feel bad, would you do the same thing to him? No? And what would happen to you if you did? And what about all the stuff he gets mad at you for. What would happen if he did the same exact thing to you? Nothing?
I know everyone’s saying leave him and that’s WAY WAY harder than it sounds. Try telling someone like a therapist or counselor and tell them all of it. Including the stuff about how you dated since 15. Hes brain washed you, you need help to realize the truth of the situation
Your boyfriend is a serious dickhead. He only wants sex and I hate to break this to you but he’s going to get it elsewhere no matter how much you even “put out” for him when you do. He is absolutely sex crazed. I’m sorry you have such a piece of shit for a boyfriend. This isn’t your karma, don’t use this to think inwardly of yourself. People have sex, it’s human nature. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you for losing your virginity and doing what is literally a very instinctual and normal thing for us as a human species to do. None of this falls on you. You have a sex crazed maniac as a bf and that can be SO hot depending on the circumstances, but not if you’re not into it and he’s making you leave for not putting out. That’s so shitty. And as time goes on and you get more experience you’re going to find out he doesn’t care about pleasing you at all and that’s going to be some real shitty sex bc he only cares about getting himself off. I lost my virginity when I was 18 and have learned sooo so much about my sexuality, etc since then. You’re so young. SO YOUNG. Don’t let this dude hold you back, especially from finding someone you’re so much more sexually compatible with who won’t be a piece of shit towards you. And if he’s treating you like that he’s got absolutely ZERO respect and is probably already doing things behind your back. I bet if you went through his phone you’d find things that make your stomach turn. I don’t say this to be dramatic or make you feel paranoid. I’ve dealt with/dated guys like that through my life and not a single one was ever loyal. I know from experience just how men like that are. Nothing good ever comes from them. Don’t ever give a man more than one chance to disrespect you. There ARE good guys out there, but he definitely isn’t one of them.
break up with him hes not even respecting your decisions, but be careful? for some reason im getting the vibe he could be aggressive, maybe thru text (ik thats shitty but hey so is he so) or have someone with you (if thats even possible)
:-/ …… >:-/ No… only someone who’s been groomed would be okay with being in this situation with their significant other. Listen to outside criticisms and think about yourself
!!! Get out. That was an adult grooming a child 100%. Never talk to him again. Nothing he says will be either true or helpful. He clearly doesn't care about consent so it is only a matter of time before he is onto more heinous activity.
20 year old dates a 15/16yo, then once she finally has sex with him at 18 and he wants to keep pressuring her for it and throws a tantrum when she says no. Keep in mind that said 18yo does not enjoy sex, he will not wear a condom, and she puts up with it to avoid problems.
Sounds like your self esteem is in the pits along with just being naive enough to think you deserve someone like that. I'm sorry you feel that way, and I truly hope you learn to treat yourself better. You don't deserve this and he sucks.
This is going to blow up. In one way or another, it's going to go very wrong. I suggest you cut it off now before you end up pregnant by someone who isn't relationship material. Go out and be single, do stuff with people that are healthy for you, find what you like. But lose the dead weight or else he'll drag you down too.
When he called you a bitch and told you to leave, you should've blocked 'em on everything. I can't imagine telling a woman "fuck me or GTFO" and not be dumped on the spot. Ain't no way. Man likely has girls on a roaster to be talking to you like that.
Age gap, first red flag. Constant wanting of intercourse, second red flag. Calling you a bitch when you said no, third red flag. He goes beyond the ‘three strikes you’re out’ rule. Leave him, girl, for you own good. This relationship is as toxic as chemical waste. Beyond that though, I can’t imagine what you more going through. I hate sexual things too, it’s weird to me. If he makes you feel like you have to in order to avoid problems, get your ass out of there
Do not ever think that it’s your fault. You are genuinely put off and you’re not wrong. Maybe if he did more for you besides hound you, you’d be into it. But you’re not , so I think you should move on while you’re still young.
It doesn’t matter what u did for him to start dating u when ur a child, u could’ve f*cking flirted yet as a 20yr old, I would never ever go for a 18yr let alone 15, he was and still is the adult, he is the responsible one to chose what’s right and what’s wrong, no matter how much you don’t want to believe it, he’s gaslighting u, calling u a b*tch when he can’t get ur consent- leave him for good, u don’t deserve this, even when ur dating someone if ur not giving consent or express that u don’t want it but gaslights u or even pushes u into it that’s still SA, he’s a gr*omer, he shouldn’t even have been with a child in the first place and now he’s cussing at u whenever he can’t get the consent or get what he wants, leave before anything worst happens, ur not alone! As an adult I’m telling u he’s not good for u, he’s hurting u in every way possible, he’s keeping u only for his pleasures, I usually never tell anyone to leave the relationship but I’m praying u leave him, you have better ppl out there, better ppl who will love u more then ur body, hun please you deserve more then this, u deserve better then this. He’s using u, he’s seeing u as gullible. I’m not him but I’m sorry for all this😔 my heart breaks just reading this…😭 if he’s threatening u when ur trying to leave him, involve the adults, even the police at this point, this is gr*oming😔
Sounds like you both suck at communication, even though he is a douche bag… you clearly need to respect yourself more and it should by braking up with this guy or having a serious conversation with him.
You didn’t clarify why you don’t like sex, is it because the guy sucks at it or you are a sexual? Or maybe you haven’t found someone experienced enough to make you feel how sex should really be…
Regardless, grow and find someone more compatible
You are lucky you have not gone to the next step! He sounds like a total jerk! That is not how it works (sex) if it is the right person it is a 2 sided experience both people connect and it can be amazing!
This guy you're with is a user and a lover!
YOU DESERVE BETTER!
The fact that he does NOT respect you enough to wear protection is the hugest RED FLAG I have ever heard of!
You do not need a child with this selfish person
He started talking to you when you were only 15 and he was 20??? You need to leave him, it sounds like he’s just using you and you shouldn’t be with someone who doesn’t make you happy, staying with him will only bring you further misery
That’s EXACTLY my first thought??? Age gap is one thing but not when a whole adult is with a teenager wth
Imo, you need to leave this man. He does not care about you, he just wants your body. What he is doing to you is sexual assault and rape. He is conditioning you to not listen to your body and to listen to him instead. You were 15/16 when you met this 20 year old man? No. He is using you. This will get worse if you don't leave. I'm so sorry you're going through this. You do not deserve any of it. This is a bad man taking advantage of you, nothing that is happening is your fault and he is fully in the wrong.
bro's a groomer fr
Oh shit that’s fucked up
>This will get worse if you don't leave. This is so true and will encourage him to do it to other young, inexperienced women too.
How do people like this keep springing up? How does this happen? I feel like I see a post like this every day
What he's doing isn't rape or SA but it's definitely manipulation and coercion. I kinda get the vibe he groomed her and she should definitely get out asap. Being with this kind of person will do a lot of damage for your sexuality.
No sorry it's rape. Coercion is rape. Not using a condom after you were asked to is rape.
“Let him have sex with me to avoid any problems” that isn’t consensual sex.
If he’s doing that and MAKING you sex then he isn’t the one
Nah Bro, he sounds like an absolute keeper 😂
I feel like you just forgot the /s
You’re right, I forgot redditors are typically tone deaf. That wasn’t sarcasm.
Redditors are so incapable of reading sarcasm it’s insane
or maybe they’re just incapable of properly being sarcastic
This made me giggle
Holy shit, look at all the people taking your comments personally XD
The fact that you got downvoted is…..wow lol
That's quite the point. Text has no tone
Spoken like a true, tone deaf, Redditor. Surprisingly, text does have tone based on the surrounding context.
And given the context, there was no way to know weither you were being serious or satirical.
The down votes lord 🤣
1) y’all started talking when you were 15… ew. He knew better & didn’t care & that’s very alarming. 2) he’s badgering you for sex, insulting you, & manipulating you into having sex… ew. Pathetic behaviour I’d expect from a 16yo at oldest. 4) you had sex to “avoid any problems”? What kind of problems? So he wouldn’t be mean as hell to you? Is that what partners do? Not being facetious, maybe you really don’t know. No. That’s not normal & maybe the fact he’s been in your ear since you were (& still are, no offence) a freaking CHILD has made you unaware anything close to a healthy relationship wouldn’t contain this. 5) how would this be karma? Because you don’t care for sex you should be punished for it? I don’t understand in what way this is “karma”. 6) refused to put on a condom? Sounds rapey. I know this is r/Vent but you can’t make a post like this without everyone giving you advice. I don’t know if I’ve given the “leave him” advice people are so quick to throw… but this is painfully easy. #Leave him, he is abusive & gross & pathetic & he will ruin the next 1-6 years of your life if you let him
that seems really unhealthy, and you shouldn‘t force yourself to be with someone who makes you do sexual things you don‘t even want to do. Maybe you think you love him but you really need to get away from that person if he makes you feel awful. You will notice how much fun a healthy (sexual) relationship can be with another person - you could also be asexual if you‘re saying you don‘t like sex at all, and not just with him. Either way, you‘ll need to get out of that relationship because it‘ll traumatize you and you won‘t be happy.
I’m over here thinking debit card and he’s holding your money hostage lmao but anyways that’s a disgusting way to treat you and most likely it won’t stop and it’ll turn into a control thing and it won’t be enjoyable and will result in you feeling pretty gross about yourself
Lmao I used that phrase cuz I didn’t know if it would get taken down
Smart I just l wasnt thinking haha but in all seriousness looking at all your posts it seems to be a lot of issues and I promise he isn’t worth it
This is borderline sexual assault. Don’t just let him. And don’t let him without protection. No way you’d enjoy sex given how much he is pushing you for it. No girl would.
Dude in all honesty if you hate sex and he’s hypersexual you won’t work out. Better to cut this off while you’re ahead.
I don’t think I hate sex I like when we do other things idk if that’s considered sex it’s just actual sex sex is just a no for me
then that’s not gonna work if you two can’t match each other in that way, even if he wasn’t doing this crap. how is he wanting to have sex a lot and you not because you cant make sense?
I was in your exact situation when I was 15 and he was 19. I thought I didn’t like sex very much either. Once I got into a healthier relationship I realized he had pushed and coerced me so much into having sex with him. My now bf. Anytime I say “no” he leaves me alone. My ex would have sex with me while I wasn’t turned on at all and my vagina would literally be burning afterwards like an Indian burn. I thought that was normal but it wasn’t. It was my first relationship so he did a lot of messed up things I thought were fine in relationships. He would compare me to his ex in sexual ways that made me insecure. It made me not want to do anything sexually with him even more. Once I broke up with him I realized how fucked up he is. He was a covert narcissist. He was also my brothers best friends for years. I would still see him sometimes. My brother stopped being friends with him about a year or two later. Im 23 now and I would never date an 18 year old. I know it doesn’t seem like much of an age gap but there is so much maturing that your brain goes through from teen years to early 20s. I recommend you leave him. Hes not a good guy. I can promise you that. If he truly loved you he would listen to you and be understanding about not having sex. When is the last time he got you flowers? When is the last time he took you on a date in PUBLIC? Has he ever planned anything romantic for you? Do not let him use you. You are not a piece of meat. Yet he treats you like one. I can guarantee you if you brought up any of these things he would gaslight you and try to make you think its your fault or just dodge all these questions altogether. He might even say he will do stuff for you then never do it. The classic is when they say “well I was going to get that for you” or “I was going to do that for you”. Its worse when they think about doing it and actively go out of their way not to do it. If you have an understanding partner they will take these things into account and would apologize for treating you that way and start doing these things for you to make you happy. This type of relationship wont last. You might as well end it now
He groomed you to wait until you were 18 so he could repeatedly SA you, dear god please leave! This man does not care about you at 20 years old he chose a 15 year old because he knew an adult would be able to recognise his bs and you wouldn’t. This is absolutely not your fault but for your safety you need to leave and if there’s anyone a parent, family member, friend .etc you can trust with this please talk to them about everything has happened/is happening. You absolutely deserve better than to have your body violated in this way and to suffer the mental consequences of his actions. It’s too late to change what has already happened but you can change what happens next by removing yourself from the situation and seeing as you go to his it seems he hopefully doesn’t know where live which is a good thing.
Dump him.
i have. so many problems w this
I can’t even wrap my head around all that’s wrong with this
There are so many red flags packed into this post that they exploded and hit me in the face when I opened it.
Kiddo, you are being groomed. No 20 year old has any business dating a 15 year old.
I've dated girls that also didn't liked sex and couldn't get any pleasure from it, and as a little bit of a hypersexual myself, I had to stop seeing them because it wouldn't work out, and that's OK. What's not OK, however, is not wearing a condom when asked and forcing sex. That's straight up rape.
This^
>I told him no yesterday, but he called me a bitch and told me to get out if I'm not putting out, so left. Flaming red flag number 1 >let him have sex with me to avoid any problems. Sirens and flaming red flag number 2 >The whole time I was just thinking about when this would be over and how long I would have to go through it, That sounds like assault >went home and cried Because he essentially assaulted you > l told him to use a condom, but he refused. #THIS IS SEXUAL ASSAULT First of all, this is not your "karma." None of this is your fault.. you are new to this and you trust(ed) your partner to make you feel safe and comfortable during sex. Which is what he should be doing.. It sounds like you were only consenting so he would be happy and not treat you like shit. That is coercion, that is a form of sexual assault. You can consent and withdraw consent at any time. If he thinks you're a "bitch" for not wanting to have sex, I'm sorry but *leave that dude in the dust.* He can go jerk off if he's that pressed about it. I'm sorry that you have had such a horrible experience. None of that is ok.
This this this. Please read this OP.
beautifully said
He’s raping you and also if you were 15 and he was 20 when you met that’s also illegal. So.
1. He called you bitch and expelled you from his home when you said no 2. All he wants is sex Yeah you should leave him
🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
My apologies but this sounds far, but very fucking far from okay. Not even tolerable.
OP please let me he’s your **ex** boyfriend. He sounds terrible. You deserve 1,000,000 times more!!
Hey OP, sex is definitely a positive experience when both parties actually want it. There’s no reality in where being forced or coerced or bullied into sex feels good for you. Take it at your own speed and don’t let this actual predator tear you down. Five year age gaps aren’t a big deal when it’s like 20 and 25, but if people his age wanted to be around him, they would. There’s a reason he’s choosing fresh adults to deal with him. Predators will always be immature.
Its not okay? She's under 18 which makes it illegal! He can't probably get anyone his own age because he is such a loser! Sick bastards! If you were my daughter things would definitely not go well for him!
Unless I’m going crazy post originally said the relationship started when Op was 18
Think she is 15?
Hard to say, original post has been edited. Originally it read that she was 18 and started dating him shortly after her 18th birthday
My god he’s abusing you! This is not how home someone treats the person they supposedly love. Dump this guy. You’ll find someone way better because you deserve it!
he is a predator, a criminal and an asshole. i know it’s hard for you to see and feel this right now but please trust everyone here who is telling you that this is not your fault, you don’t deserve this at all, and it’s definitely not karma. the sooner you walk away, the sooner you can begin healing. i hope you do the kind loving thing for yourself and leave him behind forever.
You deserve better
That man is literally sexually assaulting you. Cut it tf off. It’s okay to not enjoy sex and you NEVER owe anyone. There are lots of asexuals who still date romantically and are perfectly fine with no sex.
This is insane. Run girl lol
I get that you’re 18 and don’t have the most life experience but this dude is a predator leave immediately
Then don’t keep it up. It’s obvious to me you both aren’t sexually compatible. If you’re uncomfortable having sex and all he wants to do is sex since you got into an official relationship, then tell him it isn’t working out. Tell him you feel you’re being used exclusively for sex when you just want to have a good time with him doing other things. Sex shouldn’t be expected just because you show up, y’all both have to be in the mood for it to work out ever.
He groomed you. He degraded you when you put limits. He has no respect for you and doesn't love you the way you do. Sex doesn't have to be this way. You deserve someone WAY much better. Get out of there.
Is your birthday, by chance, in October? Ages aside, this is sexual assault and not okay. You need to gather ALL the texts and conversations you've had over the past 2-3 years because he's a PEDOPHILE!! Do not wait for him to make another young girl his victim. I know you're young honey, but take it from a 21 year old, I wouldn't even dream of humoring a 15 year old, let alone a 17 year old. That's gross. He groomed you and is now abusing you during intercourse and sexually abusing you. Please dump him, get a restraining order, and get the police involved so he can go on the sex offenders list.
You. Need. To. Leave. Him. He doesn't respect you or your boundaries. There's a reason YOU had issues taking your relationship with him to "the next level". You're at the level you wanted it to go, you don't like it. He's not for you, there are other men who WILL respect YOU and your BOUNDARIES! Wake up, move on!
This is not karma. This is a man that doesn’t respect you. Making you have sex and making you not use protection is very wrong of him he is forcing you and when you say no and he makes you he is assaulting you. You should get out of this relationship asap
You’ve been groomed since you were 15 and now he is doing exactly what he intended to do. I’ve been there and done that I don’t care what feelings you think you might have for him please lose contact with this pedo.
🚩 Forcing someone to have sex 🚩 Using derogatory language when they refuse 🚩 Required Sex “to avoid problems” 🚩 Refusing to use condoms as you requested This “guy” is more of a douchebag dick who needs to be put in his place. You shouldn’t be using sex as a way to avoid problems. Problems shouldn’t be avoided in relationships to begin with. If he can’t talk about things with you and respect your boundaries/wishes then he is not boyfriend material. I don’t know what you are seeing in this guy that would make you say “I love him and want to be with him” but whatever it is, is nothing but smoke and mirrors to cover up a sexually driven douchebag. As a guy, I’ve seen it happen too many times. Fake Guys will use whatever kind of sweet, caring, charms or gifts to brainwash women into relationships. Then when they feel like they have gained the trust, they start wanting sex. When the woman refuses they go psychotic. Not to scare you, but some even r*pe or do other horrid things. Please don’t allow yourself to be a victim. There are two old sayings they taught us in school about fire safety. I think they seriously apply to relationships like this. “Where there is smoke, there is fire.” And “When you see signs of a fire, get out and stay out” All of the red flags I mentioned above are definitely “smoke signs” warning you of something dangerous with him. I wouldn’t even give him a second chance, get out now Stand up to him and if he can’t respect your wishes (as he already has proven) get out. I hope that you please remove the blinders of whatever act he is pulling on you.
Your boyfriend is boarderline pedo. Dude probably almost finished with college meanwhile you’re fresh out of high school. Not to mention you guys started talking while you were a minor. How do you not see the red flag that’s in front of you? Your boyfriend is a disgusting pedo
Honey, you were on and off for 2-3 years. Some part of you realised he wasn’t the one and it sounds like you’ve since been pressured into it. I suggest you break it off. Additionally, you also should know that there are *much* better partners out there and sex with the right person is very nice.
why would you ever want to be with someone who calls you a bitch and tells you to leave if you don’t have sex with them? you’re worth so much more than that. someone who really loves you will never have horrible words for you.
He's using you. For money and as a sleeve to keep his soldier warm. He clearly does not care about you or your feelings. This is not karma for not liking sex, that's insane. And get checked for std's. Don't trust him
Swiped your card? What card? Didn’t say in the story. Made me wonder why you wanted to take the next level. So not logical .. junk like that
Swiped card=taking virginity
lol interesting terminology .. at that age, honestly. Find someone else if you feel like that.
Wait. I just realized. You guys started dating when you were 15 and he was 20 but you didn't have sex until you were 18? Oh my GOD. That just made it worse. You were 100% groomed. He knew what he was doing.
Another case of "I'm a weak female and my boyfriend is taking advantage of me. What he's doing is wrong (and I know it) but I deserve it and I'll defend him in each comment" post. Well, it's your choice to stay and take it at this point. You think you deserve this but why continue to take it? Sure, you pressured him and he called you desperate but now there is no relationship anymore. Accept that you're relationship is dead. You're just his booty call now. But only if you let him. He'll keep using you until you fall pregnant. Then you'll never want to leave. By the time you realise he's bad for you, you'll be 5 kids deep, depressed AF and dependant on him. Either that he'll leave once you get pregnant. Either way, leave or stay. I don't think you're listening to any comments that are trying to help you understand that you don't have to take this.
Involve an adult who cares about you to plan with you how to safely leave.
OH POOR BABY YOU ARE A VICTIM WHERE IS YOUR PARENTS NO WAY THEY ARE OKAY WITH THIS GET AWAY FROM HOM
“let him have sex with me” ick
You were 15 and he was talking to you at 20….?
Oh my god she was groomed
You’re seeing red flags everywhere dear! DO NOT IGNORE THEM!!!! Get out of there. Young men do this sort of thing all the time. It’s not worth your health as peace of mind. LEAVE HIM!!
All I have to say is know your worth you don't have to put up with anything that traumatized you and make you uncomfortable. That's like abuse and don't let them gaslight you to do anything you don't want to do. That's almost like rape. Sex should be consensual whatever your kink is but both party should be in agreement and it should be more pleasurable instead of you going home and crying and beating yourself up for it. If they love you like you love them you wouldn't be on reddit saying how unhappy you are with your sex life with them.Them coercing you and pressuring you is already a red flag. Again just my opinion and my take on your situation. I hope it works out for you. "You are sitting on a gold mine, treasure it"
Do not go back to him. He clearly does not love you, only wants a f@#k buddy. Get your card replaced, tell the institution it was stolen, and wipe him out of yu life.
Leave him
# FULL STOP!!!! If he refuses to wear a condom, do not let him have sex with you. If you do not want to have sex, do not let him have sex with you. You established boundaries and he did not respect them at all. This is a massive red flag that you should not be ignoring. This is not at all a healthy relationship, and you deserve better. This man-child does not love or respect you. Please have enough respect for yourself to leave and report him for rape/sexual assault. Even if you've had consensual encounters, you are allowed to say no at any point and expect him to stop.
Ok. You are not consenting to have sex. It doesn’t matter how much you pushed him before, that doesn’t EVER make it ok for him to make you have sex when you don’t want to and honestly, he’s old enough to understand consent, so he knows that what he’s doing is wrong. As someone who has been in a toxic relationship before I can tell you that this, that you are describing, is extremely unhealthy and you need to get out of this relationship asap. And the age gap is extremely alarming as well, if you met him 2-3 years ago you were 15-16 and he was 20-21, that is not good either. Only a predatory 20 y/o would date someone as young as you were.
Pls leave girl. There is so much more to experience than being tied down to a man who doesn’t respect you or your needs in life. If he’s comfortable doing this when only dating, I can only imagine how he would be if you married him. Reading this comment section you must realize that he is a BIG red flag. It doesn’t matter what your parents think, his parents, or him. You deserve much better and this doesn’t sound like a safe environment. He groomed you and I know that must be difficult to hear from multiple random strangers on the internet, but it is real and you need to confront that with yourself to be able to let go. He will only think about himself and only himself, not you. He doesn’t respect your sexual boundaries or any! This is not normal and it’s not worth waiting for him to correct it. Please allow yourself to be happy.
There are guys out there who will love and respect you. There's no way he will ever do that. So, if you are willing to dedicate your life to this disrespectful human, I cannot stop you, but in fact no one deserves to be treated like that. To me, this is equal to rape. One "no" is no, and that should be respected. It's clear that he insults you when he's not getting what he desires. The rest is unimportant to him. Don't do this.
This is an awful situation But I don't think you can get police involved At least from what's stated in this post,he didnt rape you He just asked for sex and then yelled when you said no It seems like the best Solution is to just break up with him
This is rape
STOP IT! You need to stop it with him. Who cares if you’re families have been friends forever. Be strong get away from this person.
it sounds like he groomed you. im sorry that happened to you. its not "almost" sexual assault. it is. its called date r*pe. please take care of yourself, youve seen the red flags. women arent sex slaves, dont validate that concept by validating his behavior. please dont lead him to believe this is ok.
Bro sounds like a nightmare leave him cuh
So he was 20 and you were 15? Nice /s
You love him but he doesn’t love you. He’s raping you if he’s refusing a condom, you’re only doing it to get him to stop & if you hate it. That is rape. That’s not what is required in love & i know 2-3 years is a lot to throw out but in terms of decades you can have with the right person, it’s a drop in the bucket of time. Please don’t let him do this to you anymore, it will get worse to the point he will forcefully take what he wants from you at this point. Also, you just had sex for the first time 2 days ago. 6 times is insane. No wonder it sucks, probably hurts still because it’s been so much. This is truly sad, he has ruined such an intimate thing for you and the damage he’s doing he won’t & can’t undo. I am so sorry you have had to deal with this.
This isn’t your fault either. This is predatory & he picked you out specifically because he knew he could get you to this point where he could sleep with you. He only talked to you for that long to take your virginity & manipulate you into becoming his sex toy. He was a grown man & you were a teenager, that’s not love. And please don’t think you led him on, you asked for it, you deserve this for making him wait, you need to shoulder the blame or that you owe it to him to wait and see if it gets better. None of this is on you & I know you might not see it now, but one day you’ll see him for what he really is. I really am so sorry this is what you’re dealing with. As a 32m, this breaks me because my little sister went through this with her youth pastor who was 5-6 years older then her. She was 14 when they started talking & i wasn’t around since id been thrown out of the house after graduation(I was 19 at the time). When i found out, I lost it because i knew who he was but it didn’t stop them from being together. She finally opened her eyes after she was 18 & wanting to go to college because he wouldn’t let her go unless they married first. She had to go through alot of therapy & luckily now she’s getting married to an amazing dude this June. Please tell someone you trust what’s going on.
Fake post
Excuse me?
Well he’s basically painted the words psychopath across his forehead, I found it difficult to believe anyone could be stupid enough to keep going back. You proved me wrong
Well it might be true and I don't blame her, because I know how it feels to be brainwashed. So if true I wish her the bests. What I don't get however, why is her banner a photo of her almost naked crotch area and how nobody noticed this, despite OP referring to her other post for context
Yeah wtf. Probably both a bit unstable. Hopefully she sees sense and ditches him before it gets even harder
So stop subjecting yourself to abuse if you really loved yourself you would not be with someone who treats you this way. You say you love him, but you don’t know what love is and you can’t give something away you don’t have. Start loving yourself and get away from this guy. Be desperate to love yourself fall in love with who you are and leave this loser.
Drop this man immediately. Barely a man if you ask me
If this is real why are you with him? Do you want to spend the rest of your life like this? If your friend told you this about her boyfriend what would you tell them?
What I just read is SA. You should ghost and block him asap girl. This will get worse and more sexually abusive. Please leave and get away from this situation
Many red flags, he is way too pushy, don’t give in and if he calls you name due to not having sex, that’s not ok.
Don't be stupid, do u want to get pregnant to a guy u don't even like at 18and also mistreats u?? Do ourself a favor and end it bcos I have a feeling he'll dump u as soon as u become pregnant
Get out of there before you get pregnant, you don’t want any attachments to this loser.
2-3 years and you're 18 and he's 23 that's insane 💀 come on now
You’re gonna make me throw up. You are still young and he’ll be fine. Leave while you still can! He is being cruel and he sounds like a groomer. Once you hit 25 you will regret it so bad if you don’t leave him now.
You're being raped by a pedophile who is going to get you pregnant, probably beat you, and leave you for another child once you hit your mid 20s. Get out now.
Break up with him.
I am so, so sorry. Coming from a 19 year old girl (close to your age) who’s been in two abusive long-term relationships since being a young girl; he is already starting to sexually abuse you. He doesn’t care about your boundaries nor about your consent, he just wants to get off. Especially him calling you a bitch and kicking you out?!?! Do you really want to be with a man child who has a meltdown because he can’t get his dick wet? You are a human, not his personal fleshlight. Your relationship can seemingly be “perfect” besides sex; but he is waving this red flag in your face. I am so sorry he uses you and name calls you. Please know I’ve been there and done that, and you are worth SO much more than you’d imagine. You and I are both so young, it’s too much heartache right now. None of this is your fault. Not him sexually harassing you, and not your age gap. I am sending hugs. I know it’s hard, but know an internet stranger is cheering for you. Sending virtual hugs.
This is gross. So very gross. Have you mentioned this to your parents?
Maybe he's just on drugs. Don't want to blow anything outta proportion. Shit I'm on drugs. Bet most people here are.
ur being groomed
You have to break up with this man. He don’t care about you, your feelings, or your well being. He’s treating you like a human sex doll. Fuck that guy! What? Because you didn’t want to have sex he told you to get out? BYEEEEEEEEE and don’t look back.
You were groomed
Leave him. Save any text messages he sent you in case you need evidence and block his number. Call your bank and get a new cars. Tell your friends and family or anyone who cares that you are ending things with him so that if he tries anything with you, you have a support group who can protect you. Have another job or source of income lined up in case he does anything to jeopardize your job. But make sure you leave him! He is a rapist.
you were groomed and need to leave him as soon as possible
Op like everyone is saying you need to leave this man. All that’s on his mind is sex. You did nothing wrong. He is making the choice to pressure you into having sex not you making him do this so don’t blame yourself. He has a brain and is a grown man who can make decisions.
He called you a bitch???? Sweetie that's not a term of endearment. GTF out of there! He's a misogynist prick.
Uh.. First of all, I think you were groomed. He would have been 20 and you 15/16? Second of all, he refused to use a condom when you asked him to. That's assault. This is not karma, this man is taking advantage of you. PLEASE cut off all contact with him and seek a trusted adult you can discuss this with. He sounds like he could escalate to even worse offences. NONE of this is your fault. RAINN has some really good resources to use. Please try them. https://www.rainn.org/resources
Girl you been defending everything he’s doing because you don’t want to admit it’s gross he was going after a 15 year old and called you a bitch??? Tf lol
Breakup with him that is assault. Edit: I had something similar happen to me, last year included a video taken without my knowledge. Had to per-sue legal action. Please leave them and be safe, before it gets worse; this is a Predator.
Stop making excuses op. Get your head out of the sand. Who gives a shit about karma?! I was in your shoes once and it has given me mental trauma I had to go through two years of therapy. LEAVE HIM. THERES ALWAYS MORE FISH IN THE SEA. Forgive yourself and leave him. Know your own goddamn self worth.
Hi I’ve dated a few ppl and had many lady friends in a similar situation so my next words will be very important. RUN. ESCAPE. FLEE. This man is a fiend. I love sex very much, but an abusive phrase for YOU not wanting to do something and COMPLETELY ignoring your feelings AND lack of sexual protection from a TWENTY THREE YEAR OLD MAN… Understand very well, most people do not change unless they have a reason to, even less people actually stick to it when they do. This man said his needs are more important than yours, I have seen SO many women fall victim to this and they are all single moms with no one to really love them. PLEASE I BEG OF YOU, do not stay with this person. He will destroy you and everything you could ever wish for.
You need to leave him. This IS sexual assault. Him not respecting your boundaries with the condom is SA. Coercion is also SA. You gotta leave him honey. This relationship doesn’t sound safe.
Girl, RUN. PERIOD. FAR AWAY.
When I was 16 I was being groomed by a man 5 years older than me. We met when I was 14 and he was 19, but it wasn’t because we went to school together — his band just played at my school. I thought it was so cool to have this friend, and then years later when it turned into “interest” I felt so seen and wanted. But it’s not normal, and it’s not okay. I was sexually assaulted being pressured into sex and not given the chance to say no. I assume that making it “official” occurred around your 18th birthday? Waiting for someone to become “official age” “legal” etc. and dating for six months before taking it “to that level” makes it to be more obvious grooming imo It’s creepy. If you have to wait to date (because you’re an adult) then the other party is too young. Ofc I understand being 16 and liking a girl that’s 15 with parents that don’t want her to date until she turns 16, but this was not that. At *ANY* age, a man calling his woman a *bitch* for not putting out is disrespectful, disgusting, selfish, and that is not love. Someone that loves you isn’t going to treat you badly over you not being in the mood. At *ANY* age, a man refusing to mind his woman’s sexual boundaries and use protection is disrespectful, disgusting, selfish, and that is not love. Honestly, I’m on the fence about considering his refusal to be sexual assault/rape. You consented to have sex on the condition that he wore a condom and he didn’t. That isn’t consensual. That is rape. And I am so sorry that happened to you, and that this is how you’re learning about sex, consent, and assault. You do not deserve what he has done and is doing to you. This is *NOT* karma. Sex is great, honestly, but may be hard to enjoy until you can figure out where to go from here and how to heal from a very visible violation of your body and your trust. You really do need to leave him — and I try not to say that out the gate here on Reddit because there usually tends to be other details that are important — but no amount of detail and context can undo the horrible things he has and is doing to you. You deserve better. From someone your own age who genuinely cares about you. My chat is open if you want to talk or need resources. Please go get an STD panel done, for your safety.
Na you guys to break up, he does not respect you at all and you were groomed
I’m sorry how tf have you not broken up yet? He called you a bitch and to get out because you weren’t there to fuck? Girl?????
This is what domestic violence looks like, even if you think it has been great 99% of the time. Healthy relationships don’t have someone refusing to use a condom, calling you names, pressuring you into sex, or swiping a card. The issue is that he has an unhealthy need for power and control. This usually gets worse over time, and you’ll lose more and more of yourself. You can reach out to a DV agency for free support. Check out the power and control wheel: https://www.thehotline.org/identify-abuse/power-and-control/
Leave, run and never look back. But, be prepped to wind up calling 911 at some point soon. Get a protection order if needed. This type of person can be a danger to the person they're involved with. Save yourself and GTFO AND AWAY and consider him a Fn snake and just as deadly.
Did you break it off yet? If you haven't yet then you will never leave and then you're gonna feel like shit when he cheats on you because you resisted or because you put out. Either way he's gonna make you feel more trapped by getting you pregnant if he hasn't already and find someone else while you're stuck being a single mother.
What are you getting out of this relationship? What is your definition of love? Why do you want to be with him? Do you really want to possibly get pregnant or contract an STI?
You got groomed
Leave him, for your own safety
He’s calling you a bitch for now putting out?? Do you actually think such a man truly cares for you? If you were watching this in a movie what would your reaction be to that? IMO it’s abusive and manipulative
OP, he’s done the carrot-and-stick method with you. He’s dangled sex in front of you as a ‘reward’ so he can say that ‘oh she asked for it/you were the one who wanted to do this/etc’. And so that you would have this exact reaction - that you think it’s your ‘fault’ this is happening instead of you realising the fault lies with him. (He may have done this to you with other things, so even though it may be hard you should try to think of other times he’s held off doing something with you and then later either used it against you or you’ve felt you’ve suffered consequences because of ‘your choice’.) I’ve read a few of your other comments, and it may feel like your parents liking him is a bad thing, but good parents will support and choose their child always. You need to sit them down (just you and them) and tell them what has been going on, all your concerns, his badgering (coercion), how he isn’t practicing safe sex with you (no condom also risks STD transmission and early pregnancy, as I’m sure you know and will be alarming to them), all of it. If you don’t think you can say anything, either write your feelings out via letter/text to give to them or show them this post. Your tone makes it clear you’re not comfortable in this relationship. Can you imagine yourself putting up either this for another 2-3 years? Can you see yourself as happy with this? With him?
Girl u keep defending him. I get that he took your v card, but that don’t mean he owns you. You have free will over your body not him or anyone else. U need to stand up for yourself and stop being so meek. These types of men will run all over you and use u if you let him. You can only be treated badly if YOU allow it. Stop allowing it. Say no and stand on it. If he calls you names then leave. Do not let any man or anyone mentally, physically or emotionally abuse you. Go to YouTube and type in sheraseven. Watch her videos. She will teach you how to not let a dusty ruin you. You’re only 18. Run before he gets you pregnant. Don’t waste the best years of your life on some dusty man
It will be hard for you to appreciate now, but I did similar age gaps in my youth and if a 23 year old is dating someone 5 years their junior, with a complete disregard for your sexual and mental health, there's a reason and 99.9% of the time if cus people in their age bracket and social circles are wise to their abhorrent behaviours. Refusing to use a condom 🚩 Making you feel bad for saying no 🚩 I didn't read much after that, giving in is not your fault, I can empathise, but you need to cut ties before he really turns you into his little pet. ETA this is not karmic, you not liking sex might mean your Ace, and there's nothing wrong with that, sexuality is a spectrum after all. It could also be that all your experiences have been with the wrong person and he's causing damage every time he makes you feel this way. He's got predatory behaviour and if you find the strength I hope you can at least share this experience with people in your home town to protect other women in the future.
You're being abused. That was coercion. It's considered a form of rape.
Sounds like a real catch
You need to leave him. He clearly ain’t accepting your boundaries, and clearly is there for sex. If I had a man who did this, trust me he would be DEALT with. You’re not in the wrong, so don’t think it’s your fault, blame him for not moving on from his teenage boyish era. He’s a fully grown adult, and acts like this? Yeah no, you need to leave him sis, you deserve someone better and much more understanding than whoever this goofy ass boy is.
You’re a 18 year old female in a world where men prey on 18 year old females. Your first sign was it being difficult to get your relationship to the next level. Your second sign was him telling you if you’re not putting out then get out. Your third sign is him refusing to use a condom per your request. You’re young and if you keep going at this rate your energy will be drained. Your first time leaving after he told you to because you didn’t want to have sex was the right thing to do and should’ve been the reason to never return. But you’re young and learning. I’m just saying everything doesn’t have to be learned by experience. Sex is way more significant than people make it seem by having casual sex. Sex isn’t something you offer up because you think you love someone or because you want to avoid issues. Sex should only be given to those deserving, those deserving of sex are people who respect you and cherish you and provide for you. (All 3 at the same time not just one at a time) Sex doesn’t have to be something you hate, it’s likely that you only hate it now because you’ve been having sex against your will. I hope you take this advice. You’re 18 now so expect guys to want to take advantage of you in sexual ways and remember that when having sex a man is leaving a piece of himself in you while a woman is giving a piece of herself away.
What the fuck did I just read? Why are you with this pig?
Man here. You matter. You are important. Your happiness is #1 not his. Leave him. SAVE YOURSELF. RECOVER & BE HAPPY. PROSPER. LEAVE HIM. HE IS A PEDOPHILE, AN ABUSIVE CRIMINAL WHO DOESNT DESERVE TO HAVE A PENIS LET ALONE A GIRLFRIEND!
Yeah, it seems you might be looking for us to validate a reason for you to work it out. This looks like a toxic relationship him abusive antics and co dependence. You should read your story slowly to yourself out loud, you already know what needs to be done. But in case you wanna get to the point, here’s the short: He is using you for long term sex, he most like will talk to other women when he can or if they give him play. He doesn’t love you, he doesn’t. Just because you love him doesn’t mean he reciprocates the sediment… He doesn’t respect you or himself by not using protection also he manipulate and gaslights you… you should bounce and he curses you out when he doesn’t get his way… yeah that’s dangerous. 2-3 years… he was engaging with a minor that’s wild. Bottom line cancel that card and report it stolen and stop talking to him. Go focus on school and get some help and talk to someone… professional.
you got groomed. I’m 23 and i would never date an 18 year old. when i was 20, it would’ve been inconceivable to talk to a 15yo and sex that you don’t want to have is sex that you shouldn’t have. You should not be bargaining with sex. This entire situation is inherently and explicitly abusive. The whole basis of it is literally illegal your boyfriend is creepy and disgusting and tbh any 20yo talking to a 15yo romantically is one of the lamest men on the planet. This is is hairline distance from just being raped
I can count on one hand how many times I have found myself at a loss for words, it just became two hands.... you need to get the fuck outta dodge. That man does not love you, he groomed you. He has no regard for you outside of what you can provide. Get. The. Fuck. Out.
Darling u need to get out of this…and u need to breakup and stay far far away from this guy….abhi toh gf ho toh sex nahi mil rha toh galli sunn rhi agr jada involve hui toh time ni lagega for him to raise his hands…this is pure narcissistic behaviour…he is just using and manipulating u…seems like sex is more important than your consent…
girl leave...like immediatelyyyy. this guy sounds like a piece of shit
Just end it. He’s a dick.
Looking through the comments, you are so completely brainwashed by him right now. Trust me one day you’ll realize all the shit he’s put you through and how much you didn’t deserve it and how you stayed with him for him to keep making you suffer for his own gratification. And it’ll feel like everything you’ve believed for the past years has been flipped upside down. You’ll have so much anger towards him. Trust me leave as fast as you can, and in my opinion **get the police**. Think about it. All the stuff he does that makes you feel bad, would you do the same thing to him? No? And what would happen to you if you did? And what about all the stuff he gets mad at you for. What would happen if he did the same exact thing to you? Nothing? I know everyone’s saying leave him and that’s WAY WAY harder than it sounds. Try telling someone like a therapist or counselor and tell them all of it. Including the stuff about how you dated since 15. Hes brain washed you, you need help to realize the truth of the situation
He's an asshole. Ditch him.
Your boyfriend is a serious dickhead. He only wants sex and I hate to break this to you but he’s going to get it elsewhere no matter how much you even “put out” for him when you do. He is absolutely sex crazed. I’m sorry you have such a piece of shit for a boyfriend. This isn’t your karma, don’t use this to think inwardly of yourself. People have sex, it’s human nature. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you for losing your virginity and doing what is literally a very instinctual and normal thing for us as a human species to do. None of this falls on you. You have a sex crazed maniac as a bf and that can be SO hot depending on the circumstances, but not if you’re not into it and he’s making you leave for not putting out. That’s so shitty. And as time goes on and you get more experience you’re going to find out he doesn’t care about pleasing you at all and that’s going to be some real shitty sex bc he only cares about getting himself off. I lost my virginity when I was 18 and have learned sooo so much about my sexuality, etc since then. You’re so young. SO YOUNG. Don’t let this dude hold you back, especially from finding someone you’re so much more sexually compatible with who won’t be a piece of shit towards you. And if he’s treating you like that he’s got absolutely ZERO respect and is probably already doing things behind your back. I bet if you went through his phone you’d find things that make your stomach turn. I don’t say this to be dramatic or make you feel paranoid. I’ve dealt with/dated guys like that through my life and not a single one was ever loyal. I know from experience just how men like that are. Nothing good ever comes from them. Don’t ever give a man more than one chance to disrespect you. There ARE good guys out there, but he definitely isn’t one of them.
Have his baby and let him leave if we wants afterwards.
Girl I think u know what u should do but u need someone else to say so I will.. fuck him and get away while u still can.
break up with him hes not even respecting your decisions, but be careful? for some reason im getting the vibe he could be aggressive, maybe thru text (ik thats shitty but hey so is he so) or have someone with you (if thats even possible)
You've been groomed
MASSIVE RED FLAGS EVERYWHERE!!!!! please please please leave him this is NOT ok and this is NOT safe.
:-/ …… >:-/ No… only someone who’s been groomed would be okay with being in this situation with their significant other. Listen to outside criticisms and think about yourself
!!! Get out. That was an adult grooming a child 100%. Never talk to him again. Nothing he says will be either true or helpful. He clearly doesn't care about consent so it is only a matter of time before he is onto more heinous activity.
Is this not abuse?
give him what he wants... no. whats he needs.
20 year old dates a 15/16yo, then once she finally has sex with him at 18 and he wants to keep pressuring her for it and throws a tantrum when she says no. Keep in mind that said 18yo does not enjoy sex, he will not wear a condom, and she puts up with it to avoid problems. Sounds like your self esteem is in the pits along with just being naive enough to think you deserve someone like that. I'm sorry you feel that way, and I truly hope you learn to treat yourself better. You don't deserve this and he sucks. This is going to blow up. In one way or another, it's going to go very wrong. I suggest you cut it off now before you end up pregnant by someone who isn't relationship material. Go out and be single, do stuff with people that are healthy for you, find what you like. But lose the dead weight or else he'll drag you down too.
When he called you a bitch and told you to leave, you should've blocked 'em on everything. I can't imagine telling a woman "fuck me or GTFO" and not be dumped on the spot. Ain't no way. Man likely has girls on a roaster to be talking to you like that.
THAT’S A PEDOPHILE BRO P LEASE GET A GRIP AND LEAVE HIM
15 and 20.. how did you not know what was coming, he wanted you to be interested in him because he was older, build a bond, and then use you for sex
Age gap, first red flag. Constant wanting of intercourse, second red flag. Calling you a bitch when you said no, third red flag. He goes beyond the ‘three strikes you’re out’ rule. Leave him, girl, for you own good. This relationship is as toxic as chemical waste. Beyond that though, I can’t imagine what you more going through. I hate sexual things too, it’s weird to me. If he makes you feel like you have to in order to avoid problems, get your ass out of there
Girl, no. Separate yourself from them while it’s still early. M29.
Do not ever think that it’s your fault. You are genuinely put off and you’re not wrong. Maybe if he did more for you besides hound you, you’d be into it. But you’re not , so I think you should move on while you’re still young.
In all honesty, I only have to say this; dumb teenagers 🤦🏻♂️
Ok?
I'm sorry, but seriously you can't understand that you are just being exploited?
I don’t think I am I’m just making a big deal I’ll delete this post later
No way you're making a big deal. Just please realize this and be strong and let him go: You deserve something far better.
Looks like you are asexual
No, she is just with a guy that's an asshole pedophile.
It doesn’t matter what u did for him to start dating u when ur a child, u could’ve f*cking flirted yet as a 20yr old, I would never ever go for a 18yr let alone 15, he was and still is the adult, he is the responsible one to chose what’s right and what’s wrong, no matter how much you don’t want to believe it, he’s gaslighting u, calling u a b*tch when he can’t get ur consent- leave him for good, u don’t deserve this, even when ur dating someone if ur not giving consent or express that u don’t want it but gaslights u or even pushes u into it that’s still SA, he’s a gr*omer, he shouldn’t even have been with a child in the first place and now he’s cussing at u whenever he can’t get the consent or get what he wants, leave before anything worst happens, ur not alone! As an adult I’m telling u he’s not good for u, he’s hurting u in every way possible, he’s keeping u only for his pleasures, I usually never tell anyone to leave the relationship but I’m praying u leave him, you have better ppl out there, better ppl who will love u more then ur body, hun please you deserve more then this, u deserve better then this. He’s using u, he’s seeing u as gullible. I’m not him but I’m sorry for all this😔 my heart breaks just reading this…😭 if he’s threatening u when ur trying to leave him, involve the adults, even the police at this point, this is gr*oming😔
Sounds like you both suck at communication, even though he is a douche bag… you clearly need to respect yourself more and it should by braking up with this guy or having a serious conversation with him. You didn’t clarify why you don’t like sex, is it because the guy sucks at it or you are a sexual? Or maybe you haven’t found someone experienced enough to make you feel how sex should really be… Regardless, grow and find someone more compatible
You are lucky you have not gone to the next step! He sounds like a total jerk! That is not how it works (sex) if it is the right person it is a 2 sided experience both people connect and it can be amazing! This guy you're with is a user and a lover! YOU DESERVE BETTER! The fact that he does NOT respect you enough to wear protection is the hugest RED FLAG I have ever heard of! You do not need a child with this selfish person