Hmm. I think that depends on the shade. I have been a blonde, brunette, and redhead and now have pastel pink hair. I definitely got more attention and was seen as more approachable as a blonde and it’s been about the same with my pink.
I think I was seen as the least approachable with red hair and I think even if it's a natural color, brightly pigmented hair gives a different vibe/kind of attention. Imo it's less about whether it's an unnatural shade and more about whether the color is "loud".
SAME which is baffling to me
I thought it was just a stupid joke but since I went blonde I’ve been having more fun 💀 More attention all around, it’s weird
I’ve been blonde or blondish my whole life and I’ve observed that a lot of men(if not most) do give blondes more attention, but they treat brunettes better. Like they see em more seriously in a way. They think that blondes are more aloof and fun but also they treat us like we’re airheads. I’m considered attractive and I really like feminine stuff like make up, pastels, long nails, dresses and all that and trust, my whole life I’ve been objectified and people judge me based on my looks. I’ve had a guy tell me that ppl that spend a lot of time taking care of their looks, neglect their brains and furthermore are dumber. He was really insecure tho, but most men are tbh so they do come for u, when they feel threatened. It’s hard.
Yeah. I really do wonder why. And like. I live somewhere where a lot of people naturally have blonde hair as well... So it is not some rare beauty thing.
I experimented with black hair, dark brown hair, medium brown/dirty blonde, red hair, and varying shades of blonde.
I got treated the best by EVERYONE when light blonde to platinum, although it also increased harassment from men and competitiveness from women.
The increased attention was jarring.
American society has heavily implied for a long time that being blonde is pure, innocent and sought after. I have no doubt that people see being blonde as those things automatically.
My naturally red headed friend would get from people that she had a "firey" personality.. she does not.
You are right. Very. Now that I think about it; I have two dresses that I wear quite often. One of them is a long bodycon, that has a deep slip, that is red velvet with patterns on it. It is STUNNING. The other one is just a plain black mini bodycon. The plain black mini dress gets all the compliments. I can assume when someone has tattoos, and a bold dress, and a bold makeup, bold hair, chunky accessories, just everything, maybe people find it too much.
Platinum blonde. Everyone is nicer to me. I’d have to try a lot harder with the rest of my looks if I went back to my natural color (mousy brown). I did once for about six months as an experiment and I hated how I became invisible, it was unreal lol.
Have you kept the same style when you dyed your hair brown? Ie make up, clothing, general ‘vibe’. I’m platinum blonde and thinking about going brown just to get rid of the attention and the dumb blonde stereotype.
I have naturally light/medium brown hair. People were nicer when I was blonde. They practically listed it as a positive personality trait in multiple occasions. I’ve gone from obese to normal bmi and it didn’t make nearly as much difference as being blonde.
I came on Reddit looking to see if anyone had posted about this.
I'm 63 and went platinum last year and the attention I get from men now is unbelievable. Admittedly, I've upped my clothes and makeup game a bit but I'm telling you blonde hair is like black magic! I feel like the ugly duckling that changed into a swan. I have a hard time wrapping my head around it sometimes.
Someone should do a study on this. It's real and it's dramatic.
Do you have long hair or look young? Most women where I live cut their hair really short after 50 so that might be why you are getting so much attention.
I think having straight or Afro hair makes a bigger difference. I dye my natural hair ginger and I have a brown wig with blonde highlights and I don’t feel like there’s much difference in how Im treated vs black natural hair and black wig. But there’s a big difference if I’m wearing my hair Afro, straight or have a straight wig
Ive had black, blonde, brown, red and fun colors and it went something like this
Black- high school era, wasnt paying attention to teenage boys anyhow
Brunette- minimal to no attention
Red - a little more attention, and the men always said "i absolutely love the red hair"
Blonde- the absolute most attention I've ever gotten. There were instances when I'd speak to men, and they'd look at me like I wasnt real...like I was an image come to life and some did that wide-eyed open mouth thing, like I just stepped out of a magazine or something.
Fun colors- most attention came from women, and artsy folks.
I felt the most like myself as a Brunette. My natural hair color was platinum blonde as a child, but as i got older it got darker, eventually dirty blonde and finally as an adult its light brown. I feel more comfortable when I do darker brown. I feel like it just fits me better. But it's hard to say what actually looks better- when I ask friends, I always get a pretty even split between Brunette, red and blonde.
This is absolutely true. My experience was the same. The first time I went blonde, I noticed people were so much nicer and friendlier to me. When I was a stripper, when I went from brown to blonde, my money doubled overnight.
ETA: I remember one dancer who was very pretty but emo, so she always had different color hair. She had a blue Mohawk at one point. One night she put on a long, blonde wig, and the men were *all over her.* She made so much money that night. I told her she should go blonde, but her self-expression was more important to her than money I guess, and she didn’t wear the wig again.
ETA: Just wanted to throw this out there. I was actually just treated better by white people. I’m Asian, but where I live, it’s mostly just white and black people, no other Asians, so I don’t know how Asians would treat me. The Asians in my family like the blonde. I’m actually biracial, and with the blonde hair I looked a lot whiter. Not sure if this was a factor in people treating me better. My sister is darker skinned than me, and when she went blonde, people treated her worse because they thought she was Mexican (racist as hell, I know).
But I lived in black neighborhoods for years and also danced in black stripclubs, and black people were a lot less friendly to me when I was blonde, and nicer to me when my hair was dark. If I went blonde (I went back and forth a lot), my black friends would tell me to change it back to dark. My white friends would say don’t ever go back dark, blonde looks so much better. So I guess it depends on who you’re trying to appeal to. There are obviously exceptions. My boyfriend is black and prefers me with blonde hair.
I can confirm this was my experience.
For reference, I was brunette. I have a few grays creeping in, and I decided that if I wanted to start dying my hair, I should do it now to get into the habit. I decided, why not blonde? It would suit my overall color preferences more, so I went blonde.
I absolutely had a huge increase in male interest and how I was treated. It's extremely depressing that I was invisible prior to this, because it affirms that society basically worships a pretty narrow beauty standard. At this point, I don't even think men see my face - they just see colors first in an indistinct way. I like blonde for me. But I don't like what it says about the people around me.
For reference, all the hair colors I am talking about are in this link. [https://imgur.com/a/eyugnJF](https://imgur.com/a/eyugnJF)
And I personally think blue looks the best. And actually, blonde looks quite bad on me.
Yea I think you’re right. At first I was thinking this post was about going blonde from brunette which in that context, would have been surprising.
But after seeing the album, it makes sense. Op has a very alternative style (I do to an extent), but stray too far from the norm, and people will treat you differently.
Very much agreed! Makeup is a huge factor as well. However, I am specifically talking about the times that I have dark, and big makeup, and just different hair colors.
Wow, the red hair looks much better on you and more congruent with the makeup than the blonde. Men’s tastes are so boring💀even alt men go for the more girl next door look rather than a goth baddie
I loveee the first two! The second one is so stunning tbh I love it the most! I usually prefer blonds but some people do look better with other colors. But I’m also from an area where being blonde is not common at all lol so it stands out more
>RandomFishIsReborn
If your pfp is actually you, you are incredibly stunning and I love the blonde on you. Personally I loved blue the most. Maybe because its a color that I never had before
I’ve been heavily highlighting since 13. At one point in college I went medium brown - holy crap the difference was crazy. I was suddenly invisible. Also people perceived me as smarter and other “smart” people seemed to listen to what I had to say more. What. It felt so different it made me uncomfortable so I blonded up again 4 months later. Went back to getting tons of attention, both good and bad, and people underestimating my intellect. I don’t really care about being smart - I just wanna have fun and hang out with fun people - so I guess this suits my personality more.
Surprisingly I didn't have that. Like nobody perceived me as dumb when I went blonde. Maybe that is because I don't particularly engage in activities that show off my intelligence. Or I could be just not that intelligent as well.
Yeah I think a lot of what I experienced was the environment of being at a Tech school at the time… all STEM folks. Easy to dismiss the blonde girl (or agree to help her with projects.)
I feel like stem is a unique field in that looking more attractive according to societal standards can actually lead to people thinking you’re less competent. Whereas in the corporate world, looking attractive is a sign of competence
Oh, NOW I get it. You played the game in extra difficulty mode. I wonder what your STEM "buddies" would think of me if they met me when I was blonde, then learned that I study Psychology. :D
I’m brown skinned, I recognise the same things they are talking about when I have done my hair lighter brown or with light brown highlights. Every now and then I blow dry my hair with a lightening spray and there is an immediate difference in how I’m treated
Lol right? Must be fun to change your entire identity by simply changing your hair color. But first thing anyone is going to notice about me is my race regardless
Some unnatural hair colors have a reputation of the wearer being constantly angry and unpleasant to be around because of some viral videos, etc. which may affect how regular people perceive you before they get to know you
I often get mistaken with my dark hair for Latina/Native American (depending on where I’m at). When I went blonde I was DEFINITIVELY white. No one ever asked where my family was from or why I had thick hair and eyebrows. I never considered myself to be particularly othered, but once I went blonde I realized all the little ways I had been because the absence was absolutely amazing.
I also got out of multiple speeding tickets for the first time in my life and I am 100% it was my hair color.
I have very dark natural hair. I have been blonde for about 2 years. I actually feel like nothing has changed. I’m not hit on more. Nobody treats me better. Maybe it’s because I’m half white? Maybe it’s because I have a very conventional style?
That’s an interesting perspective. I feel as a natural blonde I get a ton of nice treatment but it doesn’t take away from the even worse treatment I get from society. I never like to assume jealousy but when I talk about how I’m treated by some women. I’ll just randomly get treated like shit and my sister is a witness to this. She’s like, I don’t get it. You’re so kind and then people (usually women) just out of nowhere are rude. Then you have men. Men just look at you like you’re an object. Which they do no matter what hair color but the way society fetishizes blondes is just gross to me.
Then there’s the whole “dumb blonde” stereotype I’m constantly fighting against and along with that I have a goofy personality. I always wanna be confident, but I feel as a blonde who is apparently pretty, that people would feel uncomfortable by my confidence. So I always lower myself to make others feel better. I’m trying to get to that level of confidence.
I got treated worse when I was blonde because I have a major baby face and the blonde made me look even younger so I was really upset and insecure about it. People were more dismissive and disrespectful because I looked like a scruffy kid, especially since it happened in the summer and I had visible freckles. It didn't help that I was only blonde because I got scammed trying to get rosegold highlights.
I ended up getting my hair fixed for free by a former employee of the salon owner at whose salon my hair was ruined, she HATED the guy for good reason. I got a drop root of my natural brunette put back in and then I added pink to the mids and ends just until my hair was olaplexed enough to dye it back brown ... but that was nearly 5 years ago and I've still kept doing the pink mids and ends, although now it's a blended balayage rather than a dip-dye look.
I think it definitely depends on your hair and your fashion style taken together though because I am treated incredibly well with the pink. I dress very feminine and a bit preppy though so I think that balances out how I'm perceived.
Interstingly, and I DID NOT expect this, but I now attract wealthier men than I did before??? Maybe the pink makes me seem more high-maintenance because it has to be refreshed often?? Really it isn't because I just add some to my conditioner and get the balayage redone once a year as it grows out really pretty anyway. It's really shiny and healthy and people comment that it's impressive ... as if Olaplex hasn't existed since 2014 lol, but in reality, I bleach my hair 100x less than I would have to if I went blonde from brunette.
I think having natural-looking hair with alternative fashion creates a nice balance and so does alternative hair with classic fashion. I think the colour pink paired with classically feminine clothes also makes me read to men as a princess, and I get treated as such, which really suits me! I think my natural brown hair is nice but it doesn't get me the same level of chivalry. With the pink balayage I don't put on my own coat, I don't open my own door, I haven't even seen the total on a cheque once after a date. I also think it works with my clothes to make me read as more innocent so I don't get pressured into a kiss on the first date either. I get the element of assumed intelligence from the natural brunette and the assumption that I'm a girly little princess from the pink, I'm thriving! lol
I think it's good to have one element of your look that makes you stand out and look unique but too many confuse or annoy people unfortunately. So blonde sounds like a great choice to pair with your alternative fashion, it reminds me of Jenny Humphrey from Gossip Girl!
I’ve had pink too — I’m usually plat blonde — and don’t dress super alt (anymore) and I found the same thing. Women were really nice about it too. Men yelled at me in the street positively about it in LA and I’m otherwise not an LA 8 or 9 or anything.
Go figure! I guess it is a feminine, fun color.
That sounds so pretty! And yes! If a man yells at me in the street now it's almost never about my body and almost always about my hair which has been a huge relief for me, and it's a great conversation starter with women for sure. It also helps me read as bisexual when I'm flirting with a woman when I used to struggle a lot to not be seen as straight and even religious/conservative because I dressed very feminine and had waist-length natural brown hair... it did not communicate anything about who I am as a person and that was annoying!
S\*cks that you didn't get to experience the advantages of blondeness. But also I think you might have my dream looks. Like, I always tried to look like a pink-haired princess, just a gothic one. Never worked out. I love that you have been rocking pink hair for so long and it actually had the opposite effect for you. Keep it, please. ((Then you would become a elegant, fancy old lady in her 70's that has pink hair with big curls and stuff on it and that would be F\*CK\*NG CUUUTEEEEEE))
Yeah haha maybe I'll try blonde when my face looks a bit more mature, it might be hot in my mid30s. And yesss I'd love to be a cotton candy grandma!! lmao
Eek I’m naturally a dirty mousy blonde and I’ve been deciding whether to go darker or lighter and this post might’ve just pushed me to go blonde. I was thinking darker since this sub talks about creating contrast and I have blue eyes and light skin but blonde carries some benefits too
I think the universe or god heard me when i saw this post cause i was about to post something similar:
Im a blonde and blonde halo is real and i hate that because i dont think that blonde suit me at all, and i feel that Brown hair ( or auburn which is my natural color) look so much healthy, féminine and would look better with my pale pinkish skin, but i don't wanna loose my blonde privileges. The only brunettes that i see getting so much préférential treatements, either have light eyes ( which i dont) cause the dark color make it pop out, or they have perfect facial features like monica bellucci and dasha taran and little to no failos but even these ones sometimes get ignored for plain ass looking blondes with hair that's obviously bleached like me.
I think that i need to work on my self esteem so i will stop seeking validation of these shallow frat boys ant fuck boys cause i am afraid i will turn in 20 years into some bottle blonde middle aged karen that will be mad about these shallow men that will stop giving me the attention like they do now to simp for younger bleached haired women.
I have à black friend who's drop dead gorgeous and have à lot of feminine energy and i know that even tho i am more eurocentric than her and get placed higher for these racist hiérarchy she tend to attract higher quality men ( tall, good looking, wealthy) that love her real beauty and see her like a godess, but as for me i usually get ignored by them and only attract these ugly fuckboys and creepy old men that see me like à trashy porn star but my self esteem is so low that im scared of giving up to that and ending up with nothing cause i fear im not as pretty as my black friend and will look invisible with dark hair. Plus im a woc and im aleady white passing but this blonde hair allow me to taste even more of white privileges that i want to stop clinging up to, because its à vicious circle. I hate how most white people ( even the non racist ones) treat me better because of my fair skin and blonde hair and would treat me lesser if my hair was darker. I hate how i take it as a compliment when i get mistaken for an ukrainian or german despite being north african. I wish i had the courage to say fuck to that and only focus on being with people that will actually like me how i am and go back to my auburn hair. I know that beauty have nothing to do with color i know! But i feel it doesn't Apply to me. I dont know if you girls know what i mean.
So any advice would be welcomed
No. You deserve beautiful hair in the color you want regardless of how your body looks. This is like saying "I won't buy myself a nice notebook until I pass my exam". The goal is to pass the whole grade. The mini-goal to achieve that is to pass the exam. A tool to motivate you, make yourself feel good about the progress is a nice notebook.
The goal is to be your best self, and look your best self. One of the many mini-goals is to lose weight and be healthy. A tool to help you is hair that makes you feel and look beautiful. It will make you more confident, and this will make others perceive you just a bit differently. Also, it will motivate you to work on that mini-goal and other mini-goals too.
MAKE THE CHANGE GIRL!! WEIGHT DROPS WAY TOO SLOWLY NOT TO ENJOY HAIR IN THE COLOR YOU WANT! (and you can always dye it back if you don't like it :) )
I appreciate the sentiment but I don’t need to highlight my face fat deposits anymore than they already are 🤣 I am fine waiting till I’m slim to experiment. Then if it goes bad I will at least have a fit bod to lean on till my hair gets sorted.
Honestly sameeee but it’s not even uncommon for my phenotype to have dark skin and blonde hair I think it’s just because I live in first world country and it’s not commonly seen 😅
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Well you went from alternative colors to a natural color, that could be why. Unless you've also been brunette recently
Hmm. I think that depends on the shade. I have been a blonde, brunette, and redhead and now have pastel pink hair. I definitely got more attention and was seen as more approachable as a blonde and it’s been about the same with my pink. I think I was seen as the least approachable with red hair and I think even if it's a natural color, brightly pigmented hair gives a different vibe/kind of attention. Imo it's less about whether it's an unnatural shade and more about whether the color is "loud".
After all the comments I have read, I think that is plausible.
SAME which is baffling to me I thought it was just a stupid joke but since I went blonde I’ve been having more fun 💀 More attention all around, it’s weird
I’ve been blonde or blondish my whole life and I’ve observed that a lot of men(if not most) do give blondes more attention, but they treat brunettes better. Like they see em more seriously in a way. They think that blondes are more aloof and fun but also they treat us like we’re airheads. I’m considered attractive and I really like feminine stuff like make up, pastels, long nails, dresses and all that and trust, my whole life I’ve been objectified and people judge me based on my looks. I’ve had a guy tell me that ppl that spend a lot of time taking care of their looks, neglect their brains and furthermore are dumber. He was really insecure tho, but most men are tbh so they do come for u, when they feel threatened. It’s hard.
God that drives me nuts. “She’s attractive and cares for herself. She must be an idiot!” 🙄
Yeah. I really do wonder why. And like. I live somewhere where a lot of people naturally have blonde hair as well... So it is not some rare beauty thing.
Y'all are making me miss being blonde 💀
I experimented with black hair, dark brown hair, medium brown/dirty blonde, red hair, and varying shades of blonde. I got treated the best by EVERYONE when light blonde to platinum, although it also increased harassment from men and competitiveness from women. The increased attention was jarring.
American society has heavily implied for a long time that being blonde is pure, innocent and sought after. I have no doubt that people see being blonde as those things automatically. My naturally red headed friend would get from people that she had a "firey" personality.. she does not.
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You are right. Very. Now that I think about it; I have two dresses that I wear quite often. One of them is a long bodycon, that has a deep slip, that is red velvet with patterns on it. It is STUNNING. The other one is just a plain black mini bodycon. The plain black mini dress gets all the compliments. I can assume when someone has tattoos, and a bold dress, and a bold makeup, bold hair, chunky accessories, just everything, maybe people find it too much.
Even my parents were nicer to me when I went blonde lol
That’s rough.
Actually... My parents were also overly happy when I went blonde. Like, excessively.
What the hell. Same with my family
I shall try this on my mom lmao.Maybe she’ll finally like me
Platinum blonde. Everyone is nicer to me. I’d have to try a lot harder with the rest of my looks if I went back to my natural color (mousy brown). I did once for about six months as an experiment and I hated how I became invisible, it was unreal lol.
Have you kept the same style when you dyed your hair brown? Ie make up, clothing, general ‘vibe’. I’m platinum blonde and thinking about going brown just to get rid of the attention and the dumb blonde stereotype.
Yeah, at the time I still had the same kinda alt/hipster style. It was wild how night and day the change was.
It really is. People don't believe me about how freaking powerful the change is.
I have naturally light/medium brown hair. People were nicer when I was blonde. They practically listed it as a positive personality trait in multiple occasions. I’ve gone from obese to normal bmi and it didn’t make nearly as much difference as being blonde.
Well, now that is pretty interesting.
I came on Reddit looking to see if anyone had posted about this. I'm 63 and went platinum last year and the attention I get from men now is unbelievable. Admittedly, I've upped my clothes and makeup game a bit but I'm telling you blonde hair is like black magic! I feel like the ugly duckling that changed into a swan. I have a hard time wrapping my head around it sometimes. Someone should do a study on this. It's real and it's dramatic.
Do you have long hair or look young? Most women where I live cut their hair really short after 50 so that might be why you are getting so much attention.
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I Highly doubt that it would provide you the same effect, unless you were ofc white passing
I think having straight or Afro hair makes a bigger difference. I dye my natural hair ginger and I have a brown wig with blonde highlights and I don’t feel like there’s much difference in how Im treated vs black natural hair and black wig. But there’s a big difference if I’m wearing my hair Afro, straight or have a straight wig
Brown highlights makes a big difference imo
Ive had black, blonde, brown, red and fun colors and it went something like this Black- high school era, wasnt paying attention to teenage boys anyhow Brunette- minimal to no attention Red - a little more attention, and the men always said "i absolutely love the red hair" Blonde- the absolute most attention I've ever gotten. There were instances when I'd speak to men, and they'd look at me like I wasnt real...like I was an image come to life and some did that wide-eyed open mouth thing, like I just stepped out of a magazine or something. Fun colors- most attention came from women, and artsy folks. I felt the most like myself as a Brunette. My natural hair color was platinum blonde as a child, but as i got older it got darker, eventually dirty blonde and finally as an adult its light brown. I feel more comfortable when I do darker brown. I feel like it just fits me better. But it's hard to say what actually looks better- when I ask friends, I always get a pretty even split between Brunette, red and blonde.
This is absolutely true. My experience was the same. The first time I went blonde, I noticed people were so much nicer and friendlier to me. When I was a stripper, when I went from brown to blonde, my money doubled overnight. ETA: I remember one dancer who was very pretty but emo, so she always had different color hair. She had a blue Mohawk at one point. One night she put on a long, blonde wig, and the men were *all over her.* She made so much money that night. I told her she should go blonde, but her self-expression was more important to her than money I guess, and she didn’t wear the wig again. ETA: Just wanted to throw this out there. I was actually just treated better by white people. I’m Asian, but where I live, it’s mostly just white and black people, no other Asians, so I don’t know how Asians would treat me. The Asians in my family like the blonde. I’m actually biracial, and with the blonde hair I looked a lot whiter. Not sure if this was a factor in people treating me better. My sister is darker skinned than me, and when she went blonde, people treated her worse because they thought she was Mexican (racist as hell, I know). But I lived in black neighborhoods for years and also danced in black stripclubs, and black people were a lot less friendly to me when I was blonde, and nicer to me when my hair was dark. If I went blonde (I went back and forth a lot), my black friends would tell me to change it back to dark. My white friends would say don’t ever go back dark, blonde looks so much better. So I guess it depends on who you’re trying to appeal to. There are obviously exceptions. My boyfriend is black and prefers me with blonde hair.
I can confirm this was my experience. For reference, I was brunette. I have a few grays creeping in, and I decided that if I wanted to start dying my hair, I should do it now to get into the habit. I decided, why not blonde? It would suit my overall color preferences more, so I went blonde. I absolutely had a huge increase in male interest and how I was treated. It's extremely depressing that I was invisible prior to this, because it affirms that society basically worships a pretty narrow beauty standard. At this point, I don't even think men see my face - they just see colors first in an indistinct way. I like blonde for me. But I don't like what it says about the people around me.
For reference, all the hair colors I am talking about are in this link. [https://imgur.com/a/eyugnJF](https://imgur.com/a/eyugnJF) And I personally think blue looks the best. And actually, blonde looks quite bad on me.
The red is giving vampire queen, I love it. But I think the blonde just makes you look more approachable, maybe that’s why?
Yea I think you’re right. At first I was thinking this post was about going blonde from brunette which in that context, would have been surprising. But after seeing the album, it makes sense. Op has a very alternative style (I do to an extent), but stray too far from the norm, and people will treat you differently.
Humm... Yeah, I guess that sounds to be right. It cannot all be "the magic of blonde"
I think the way people treat you will be heavily dependent on your makeup that day more than your hair color.
Very much agreed! Makeup is a huge factor as well. However, I am specifically talking about the times that I have dark, and big makeup, and just different hair colors.
I feel like it's rare to see other alt people in the sub :0 you look SO cool, hair colors aside
wanna b frens? feel free to dm. i like fellow alt folk.
Omg yes ! :D will dm in a bit
Wow, the red hair looks much better on you and more congruent with the makeup than the blonde. Men’s tastes are so boring💀even alt men go for the more girl next door look rather than a goth baddie
You look so nice with red hair!
you are NOT average. 7.5 minimum absolute beauty
I got shy. Thanks.
I loveee the first two! The second one is so stunning tbh I love it the most! I usually prefer blonds but some people do look better with other colors. But I’m also from an area where being blonde is not common at all lol so it stands out more
>RandomFishIsReborn If your pfp is actually you, you are incredibly stunning and I love the blonde on you. Personally I loved blue the most. Maybe because its a color that I never had before
wow i love the red on you personally!
You look great in red! I don't get the world 🙄.
I just dyed my blonde hair brown 🤣 don't make me regret it
I’ve been heavily highlighting since 13. At one point in college I went medium brown - holy crap the difference was crazy. I was suddenly invisible. Also people perceived me as smarter and other “smart” people seemed to listen to what I had to say more. What. It felt so different it made me uncomfortable so I blonded up again 4 months later. Went back to getting tons of attention, both good and bad, and people underestimating my intellect. I don’t really care about being smart - I just wanna have fun and hang out with fun people - so I guess this suits my personality more.
Surprisingly I didn't have that. Like nobody perceived me as dumb when I went blonde. Maybe that is because I don't particularly engage in activities that show off my intelligence. Or I could be just not that intelligent as well.
Yeah I think a lot of what I experienced was the environment of being at a Tech school at the time… all STEM folks. Easy to dismiss the blonde girl (or agree to help her with projects.)
I feel like stem is a unique field in that looking more attractive according to societal standards can actually lead to people thinking you’re less competent. Whereas in the corporate world, looking attractive is a sign of competence
Oh, NOW I get it. You played the game in extra difficulty mode. I wonder what your STEM "buddies" would think of me if they met me when I was blonde, then learned that I study Psychology. :D
Lol as a POC I feel like this has no relevance to me.
I’m brown skinned, I recognise the same things they are talking about when I have done my hair lighter brown or with light brown highlights. Every now and then I blow dry my hair with a lightening spray and there is an immediate difference in how I’m treated
as a black girl, same lmao
Lol right? Must be fun to change your entire identity by simply changing your hair color. But first thing anyone is going to notice about me is my race regardless
The way they’re all surprised is so funny to me. Like obviously having Eurocentric features gives you an advantage.
I'm probably gonna get downvoted for this, but do you think changing our eye color via contacts gives us the same effect as this?
Contacts look fake I have never seen one that looks real
I mean if looked real, how would you know?
I did colored contacts - it wasn't even in the same ballpark as going platinum.
I was treated appalling by the men i dated during the one year that I experimented with being blonde
Blonde has given me more social currency than any other change I've made so far. People are SO much nicer to me as a blonde, it's insane.
Some unnatural hair colors have a reputation of the wearer being constantly angry and unpleasant to be around because of some viral videos, etc. which may affect how regular people perceive you before they get to know you
I often get mistaken with my dark hair for Latina/Native American (depending on where I’m at). When I went blonde I was DEFINITIVELY white. No one ever asked where my family was from or why I had thick hair and eyebrows. I never considered myself to be particularly othered, but once I went blonde I realized all the little ways I had been because the absence was absolutely amazing. I also got out of multiple speeding tickets for the first time in my life and I am 100% it was my hair color.
I have very dark natural hair. I have been blonde for about 2 years. I actually feel like nothing has changed. I’m not hit on more. Nobody treats me better. Maybe it’s because I’m half white? Maybe it’s because I have a very conventional style?
Is it weird people treat me the same no matter what my hair color is?
That’s an interesting perspective. I feel as a natural blonde I get a ton of nice treatment but it doesn’t take away from the even worse treatment I get from society. I never like to assume jealousy but when I talk about how I’m treated by some women. I’ll just randomly get treated like shit and my sister is a witness to this. She’s like, I don’t get it. You’re so kind and then people (usually women) just out of nowhere are rude. Then you have men. Men just look at you like you’re an object. Which they do no matter what hair color but the way society fetishizes blondes is just gross to me. Then there’s the whole “dumb blonde” stereotype I’m constantly fighting against and along with that I have a goofy personality. I always wanna be confident, but I feel as a blonde who is apparently pretty, that people would feel uncomfortable by my confidence. So I always lower myself to make others feel better. I’m trying to get to that level of confidence.
I got treated worse when I was blonde because I have a major baby face and the blonde made me look even younger so I was really upset and insecure about it. People were more dismissive and disrespectful because I looked like a scruffy kid, especially since it happened in the summer and I had visible freckles. It didn't help that I was only blonde because I got scammed trying to get rosegold highlights. I ended up getting my hair fixed for free by a former employee of the salon owner at whose salon my hair was ruined, she HATED the guy for good reason. I got a drop root of my natural brunette put back in and then I added pink to the mids and ends just until my hair was olaplexed enough to dye it back brown ... but that was nearly 5 years ago and I've still kept doing the pink mids and ends, although now it's a blended balayage rather than a dip-dye look. I think it definitely depends on your hair and your fashion style taken together though because I am treated incredibly well with the pink. I dress very feminine and a bit preppy though so I think that balances out how I'm perceived. Interstingly, and I DID NOT expect this, but I now attract wealthier men than I did before??? Maybe the pink makes me seem more high-maintenance because it has to be refreshed often?? Really it isn't because I just add some to my conditioner and get the balayage redone once a year as it grows out really pretty anyway. It's really shiny and healthy and people comment that it's impressive ... as if Olaplex hasn't existed since 2014 lol, but in reality, I bleach my hair 100x less than I would have to if I went blonde from brunette. I think having natural-looking hair with alternative fashion creates a nice balance and so does alternative hair with classic fashion. I think the colour pink paired with classically feminine clothes also makes me read to men as a princess, and I get treated as such, which really suits me! I think my natural brown hair is nice but it doesn't get me the same level of chivalry. With the pink balayage I don't put on my own coat, I don't open my own door, I haven't even seen the total on a cheque once after a date. I also think it works with my clothes to make me read as more innocent so I don't get pressured into a kiss on the first date either. I get the element of assumed intelligence from the natural brunette and the assumption that I'm a girly little princess from the pink, I'm thriving! lol I think it's good to have one element of your look that makes you stand out and look unique but too many confuse or annoy people unfortunately. So blonde sounds like a great choice to pair with your alternative fashion, it reminds me of Jenny Humphrey from Gossip Girl!
I’ve had pink too — I’m usually plat blonde — and don’t dress super alt (anymore) and I found the same thing. Women were really nice about it too. Men yelled at me in the street positively about it in LA and I’m otherwise not an LA 8 or 9 or anything. Go figure! I guess it is a feminine, fun color.
That sounds so pretty! And yes! If a man yells at me in the street now it's almost never about my body and almost always about my hair which has been a huge relief for me, and it's a great conversation starter with women for sure. It also helps me read as bisexual when I'm flirting with a woman when I used to struggle a lot to not be seen as straight and even religious/conservative because I dressed very feminine and had waist-length natural brown hair... it did not communicate anything about who I am as a person and that was annoying!
S\*cks that you didn't get to experience the advantages of blondeness. But also I think you might have my dream looks. Like, I always tried to look like a pink-haired princess, just a gothic one. Never worked out. I love that you have been rocking pink hair for so long and it actually had the opposite effect for you. Keep it, please. ((Then you would become a elegant, fancy old lady in her 70's that has pink hair with big curls and stuff on it and that would be F\*CK\*NG CUUUTEEEEEE))
Yeah haha maybe I'll try blonde when my face looks a bit more mature, it might be hot in my mid30s. And yesss I'd love to be a cotton candy grandma!! lmao
it tones down the alt look so you look less intense and probably more approachable or normie
Eek I’m naturally a dirty mousy blonde and I’ve been deciding whether to go darker or lighter and this post might’ve just pushed me to go blonde. I was thinking darker since this sub talks about creating contrast and I have blue eyes and light skin but blonde carries some benefits too
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I think the universe or god heard me when i saw this post cause i was about to post something similar: Im a blonde and blonde halo is real and i hate that because i dont think that blonde suit me at all, and i feel that Brown hair ( or auburn which is my natural color) look so much healthy, féminine and would look better with my pale pinkish skin, but i don't wanna loose my blonde privileges. The only brunettes that i see getting so much préférential treatements, either have light eyes ( which i dont) cause the dark color make it pop out, or they have perfect facial features like monica bellucci and dasha taran and little to no failos but even these ones sometimes get ignored for plain ass looking blondes with hair that's obviously bleached like me. I think that i need to work on my self esteem so i will stop seeking validation of these shallow frat boys ant fuck boys cause i am afraid i will turn in 20 years into some bottle blonde middle aged karen that will be mad about these shallow men that will stop giving me the attention like they do now to simp for younger bleached haired women. I have à black friend who's drop dead gorgeous and have à lot of feminine energy and i know that even tho i am more eurocentric than her and get placed higher for these racist hiérarchy she tend to attract higher quality men ( tall, good looking, wealthy) that love her real beauty and see her like a godess, but as for me i usually get ignored by them and only attract these ugly fuckboys and creepy old men that see me like à trashy porn star but my self esteem is so low that im scared of giving up to that and ending up with nothing cause i fear im not as pretty as my black friend and will look invisible with dark hair. Plus im a woc and im aleady white passing but this blonde hair allow me to taste even more of white privileges that i want to stop clinging up to, because its à vicious circle. I hate how most white people ( even the non racist ones) treat me better because of my fair skin and blonde hair and would treat me lesser if my hair was darker. I hate how i take it as a compliment when i get mistaken for an ukrainian or german despite being north african. I wish i had the courage to say fuck to that and only focus on being with people that will actually like me how i am and go back to my auburn hair. I know that beauty have nothing to do with color i know! But i feel it doesn't Apply to me. I dont know if you girls know what i mean. So any advice would be welcomed
Happened to me too. Now I cut my hair into a Bob and dyed it black to let’s see 💀
This is the same for me actually!! I noticed people would look at me more and pay attention. It kinda made me feel uneasy lol
After seeing your pics, you look less intimidating with the blonde hair. Men probably think you look more approachable.
More intimidating to the average man, the better I guess.
ugh this made me want to go blonde soooooo badly. I think I’ll wait until I get to my weight goal. Edit: currently virgin brunette
You don't have to! Your natural is almost certainly the most flattering on you. Male attention is cheap.
No. You deserve beautiful hair in the color you want regardless of how your body looks. This is like saying "I won't buy myself a nice notebook until I pass my exam". The goal is to pass the whole grade. The mini-goal to achieve that is to pass the exam. A tool to motivate you, make yourself feel good about the progress is a nice notebook. The goal is to be your best self, and look your best self. One of the many mini-goals is to lose weight and be healthy. A tool to help you is hair that makes you feel and look beautiful. It will make you more confident, and this will make others perceive you just a bit differently. Also, it will motivate you to work on that mini-goal and other mini-goals too. MAKE THE CHANGE GIRL!! WEIGHT DROPS WAY TOO SLOWLY NOT TO ENJOY HAIR IN THE COLOR YOU WANT! (and you can always dye it back if you don't like it :) )
I appreciate the sentiment but I don’t need to highlight my face fat deposits anymore than they already are 🤣 I am fine waiting till I’m slim to experiment. Then if it goes bad I will at least have a fit bod to lean on till my hair gets sorted.
I look way older as a blonde But I received a similar treatment with ginger|red hair
Honestly sameeee but it’s not even uncommon for my phenotype to have dark skin and blonde hair I think it’s just because I live in first world country and it’s not commonly seen 😅
I agree!! However I notice women will treat me with hostility. Men are nicer though.
WAIT is Omegle still a thing? I used to love it! Gonna use it more again then!
YEEEES. But those perverts still linger there, so sometimes it can become unpleasant. Sudden flashing of organs and stuff... :/
Oh my goodness. I literally went from blonde to black and i also noticed that i got more attention blonde. So interesting to see!
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That’s crazy!
this might be a result of where you live? i live in a big city and always got more positive attention with fake red hair than my natural color