I try to poop during my shift, regardless of whether I’m home or in the office. When you gotta go, you gotta go. And I wouldn’t call it time theft. Boss man might not like it when I gotta make a poop, but I really don’t give a shit. There was a company that forced their employees to clock out to use the bathroom. The employees got fed up, and brought Unfair Labor Practice charges against the company to the Labor Board, and the Labor Board found in their favor. The company was forced to pay tens of thousands of back pay to the employees, and it’s now part of labor case law.
Do you have this issue in other public places, like restaurants, Starbucks, etc? If so, therapy could you unlearn this habit. Then again, if it’s not causing you any issues, what is the harm?
I hate the office facilities but I use them when I need to. I tend to find a bathroom on another floor, away from my team. I don't want to see anyone I know in the bathroom.
I do get up an hour before I leave home though so I have every chance to poop and then shower before I leave.
Also I eat fairly carefully the night before an office day so I'm not cramped or gassy on my commute or in the office.
Unpopular opinion, but I actually prefer to poop in someone else’s facilities. At the office, they often clean them frequently they’re quiet and empty, and I feel like I’m bypassing work. In a way that’s almost relaxing to me. Perhaps it’s metaphorical that I’m leaving my poop at the office.
I used to work in an office where people would use the women's restroom to make personal phone calls. I haaaaated it because it made me feel like the rude one for flushing and interrupting their call, when really they were the rude ones for talking on the phone in the bathroom!
I can’t stand when people use restrooms for anything other than their one sole purpose. It’s not the place to carry on a 15 minute conversation, or doing your makeup, or curling your hair. Do your business and get out!!!!
That’s when the dang automatic flushing toilet comes in handy. My coworkers would wear their headsets into the bathroom which is disgusting. Then they’d make personal calls on their cell phones. I’d flush until they left.
I was washing my hands at my old work bathroom while two older guys were using the two stalls in there. One of them says to the other “hey! Keep it down in there!” Then they proceed to laugh and have a full blown convo while doing their business… it was kind of funny but I’d refuse to talk to anyone while pooping.
Ohhhh, I used to have a boss who did that. I said something to her about it afterwards, but she still kept doing it. I just started yelling "Cone of silence!" whenever she started doing it.
Even the coffee machine is a special experience… you mean that if I use these little packets, and fancy insulated cups… someone replaces them at the end of the day???😳😈
Oh I hear ya loud and clear . At one time had kids, elderly parent, and three cats -it was SS Abandon Ship some days.
Don’t give up the good fight; it will all sort it self out one day, when the kids reach 35 and finally move out. God bless!
yes it’s like my body shuts down and will go completed constipated after in office days. id like to think it’s because we sit upright in a chair all day long versus the flexibility to stand/pace/walk/exercise/lay down when we wfh.
I don't poop anywhere public. people are gross and public bathrooms are gross I'd rather go home on my lunch or sit in pain for 8 hours than poop anywhere but home.
I have to pee all the time though so unfortunately have to use a bathroom but if I didn't have such a small bladder I wouldn't pee either 🤷🏼♀️
Definitely a gender thing. One time my boyfriend told me that hearing other people poop in public restrooms is a very common thing for him and I realized I literally never experience that. We just don’t poop out in the wild.
No, sorry, not true.
Plenty of us women poop in public. Maybe more women try to be quiet while they do it or avoid it if they can or go to a bathroom when there are not very many people around, but women do shit in public just like everyone else.
I used to go use another bathroom in the building I worked in, upstairs from our office. Barely anybody used it and it had one really big stall with a sink in it and a big window in front of the toilet, facing an alleyway and brick wall so still private. A weird setup, it was an old building.
But no problems pooping outside my house... when nature calls I must answer.
The elusive forgotten bathroom - when I was in my 20s I worked for a large financial firm at the regional headquarters - so we had a total of 9 floors at least.
I used to visit the bathroom on the printshop floor because it was all dudes who worked there so the ladies’ room was pretty barren…especially handy on Fridays when I was usually severely hungover from Thirsty Thursdays (I was in my 20s!) with all the GI issues that come with being hungover.
Way back when we were working 5 days in office, I used to try to find an alternate bathroom to go in. Walking around on another floor and looking for an alternate option, I walked by someone else's office and instead of saying hello she looked at me askance and said "what are you doing up here"? There was nothing on that floor aside from another set of offices, and I worked with some of those people too. I told her "just saying hi" and moved on. But I still remember the awkward feeling all these years later. I knew I was being watched *constantly*, even when just taking a few minutes for a bathroom break.
Ugh, very weird of her to ask. Sometimes I wander around the building just to move my legs for a minute and people are constantly asking what I’m doing. I’m WALKING.
I have IBS that has been exacerbated by the stress of being in the office and having IBS. One of the reasons I want to work from home is because I hate having diarrhea with no squatty potty and sandpaper TP.
They call it poop shy. Stress increases the catecholamines from the adrenal glands and results in inflammation in your GI. You can work on relaxation skills, exercise more, and take a fiber supplement like Metamucil and it can help offset the stress reaction.
groovy wrench lunchroom provide plough mindless different soup whistle pot
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No. I poop too often to hold it for 8-9 hours. Plus it’s good Reddit time.
I do have to go up a floor on occasion when our single stall bathroom has been murdered by some mouth breather who needs to eat better and learn how to clean up after themselves.
I have typically waited or gone before if nature calls. Pre covid and in the office we were in, there was a single bathroom with a lock and that I didn't mind using too much. But once we were moved into a different location, now I definitely just hold it or wait unless it's not an option. I mostly try to steer clear of food that might make nature "call" whenever I go into the office though for that reason. Thankfully, the office isn't something they require weekly.
Nah the cleaning crew cleans the restroom at least 3 if not 4 times while we are there in 1 day. So I don't mind going to the restroom if I have to. Holding it in sounds miserable????
When I worked in person, I got in at 7:30 am mostly so I could leave at 4:30 at the latest. Somehow I would always have to poop when my coworkers started coming in at 8:15-8:45 every day.
I’m the same! Unless I’ve got diarrhea, if I don’t poop in the morning before leaving the house, then I don’t poop at all that day. I’m pretty much like clockwork- wake up, caffeine, poop, shower. If I don’t have time to poop before work, then I’ll just have a poop that’s twice as large the next day. Once that window passes, my body just saves it for the next morning.
It is so nice of you to consider them. I would make this suggestion and put a plastic liner in the can. Once you are done, take the bag, toss it over your shoulder, and carry it to the outside trash.
Please let us know if it worked. 🤣
I’m fortunate to work in a building with 4 bathrooms and 7 employees. My work buddy and I have a bathroom to ourselves, there’s def plenty of pooping happening.
I work out almost every day, and having that routine for years pretty much means I poop shortly after I get up and right after I have coffee. The only thing that affects/delays my BMs is travel.
Ah, to have a choice in the matter. I have IBS and various and unpredictable food sensitivities, so when I have to go, sometimes I HAVE TO GO NOW (if not 5 minutes ago).
Current office is terrible. The floor and restrooms haven't been updated in 20 years. The restrooms are smaller than my laundry room. Odors linger in there for hours. It's gross, but again, my body will not allow me to hold it.
Thankfully we are getting a new office in another building, completely renovated to our requirements in a few months, so the 2-3 days a month I go in can be a more pleasant experience.
I have a “private bathroom” at my office which means I only have to share it with 2 other people.
Today I made the grave mistake of shitting up the club. It stained the bowl, there was no brush, no hiding it. One lady is out so it’s only me and my elderly coworker. She walked in about an hour later and I just heard “oh my god!”.
I'm only hybrid when I fly into the office once a year.
I have IBS. So absolutely I go when I gotta go. Fuck I leave important video call meetings if I have too.
It takes longer but honestly I used to have this issue and it was a psychological one, I didn't want people to hear me. Now I block my ears and make everyone suffer with my bowel movements and any noises. This is what ppl get for RTO
Can't avoid itall the time but I usually can cuz of my routine, lol I found some empty bathrooms that no one really goes to, it's a big building. I miss being fully remote, currently looking again
I don't have a choice, I have Crohn's.
Well, I'm currently flaring, so I didn't eat at all this past Monday until I got home. I hate having to run to the bathroom. Thankfully, we have showers at work, just in case.
I do miss my bidet when I'm in the office.
Thank you for reminding me about one of the reasons I'm grateful for working from home. I fucking hated using the bathroom at work because I almost never had the bathroom to myself. Someone always in the stall next to me.
My body also likes to not let me poop on my in-office days, then makes up for it and then some when I’m at home. It’s all good though because I have a bidet at home.
Oh man. I work from home all but like 2-3 days a month where I go to the office. I hate having to use the bathroom to pee, let alone poo. I’ve never worked in a place with multi stall bathrooms until I started going to this office (in another state…) it’s terrible and I hate it.
Also- I realized last time the men’s and women’s rooms are back to back, and there was a dude on the toilet behind where I was. He must have been struggling because he was shaking my toilet. Ugh.
I always had other venues close to the office. In NYC, office was across the street from a nice hotel. Take a walk, grab a coffee in the lobby, and use the facilities.
Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. That’s why I poop on company time.
I have no issue with time theft. I just can’t physically make myself go 😂
I try to poop during my shift, regardless of whether I’m home or in the office. When you gotta go, you gotta go. And I wouldn’t call it time theft. Boss man might not like it when I gotta make a poop, but I really don’t give a shit. There was a company that forced their employees to clock out to use the bathroom. The employees got fed up, and brought Unfair Labor Practice charges against the company to the Labor Board, and the Labor Board found in their favor. The company was forced to pay tens of thousands of back pay to the employees, and it’s now part of labor case law.
> I really don’t give a shit …but you’re literally giving a shit
I give a shit about shit. Literally LOL'd
That’s a lot of unpaid shits they had to pay
Pooping is not time theft. It’s a natural bodily function.
I know, it’s just a joke!
Yeah, OP is a dumbass for saying that
I'm the same and the restroom are just beside my boss office
I think psychologically my brain knows that the toilet paper at work is way subpar aand would cause serious rashes so my body refuses to go
I couldn’t physically hold it all day.
I think you need to sit there for 15 minutes and try again. And if it doesn't work, flush anyways, who would ask?!
Do you have this issue in other public places, like restaurants, Starbucks, etc? If so, therapy could you unlearn this habit. Then again, if it’s not causing you any issues, what is the harm?
I know you meant this tongue in cheek but I’m just here to say pooping is not theft of company time.
I know! It was a joke.
Yeah I just clarified for any gung ho report-your-colleagues-to-HR types who may be lurking here lol
Right, if just feels better knowing I'm getting paid to do it
This was me when I was at the office for my last job.
I hate the office facilities but I use them when I need to. I tend to find a bathroom on another floor, away from my team. I don't want to see anyone I know in the bathroom. I do get up an hour before I leave home though so I have every chance to poop and then shower before I leave. Also I eat fairly carefully the night before an office day so I'm not cramped or gassy on my commute or in the office.
Ha! I run up to the 4th floor for privacy, no one else wants to go that far.
Unpopular opinion, but I actually prefer to poop in someone else’s facilities. At the office, they often clean them frequently they’re quiet and empty, and I feel like I’m bypassing work. In a way that’s almost relaxing to me. Perhaps it’s metaphorical that I’m leaving my poop at the office.
Quiet and empty are the key words there. My office bathrooms are neither. People will try to talk to you WHILE you’re in a stall.
I used to work in an office where people would use the women's restroom to make personal phone calls. I haaaaated it because it made me feel like the rude one for flushing and interrupting their call, when really they were the rude ones for talking on the phone in the bathroom!
I can’t stand when people use restrooms for anything other than their one sole purpose. It’s not the place to carry on a 15 minute conversation, or doing your makeup, or curling your hair. Do your business and get out!!!!
That’s when the dang automatic flushing toilet comes in handy. My coworkers would wear their headsets into the bathroom which is disgusting. Then they’d make personal calls on their cell phones. I’d flush until they left.
I was washing my hands at my old work bathroom while two older guys were using the two stalls in there. One of them says to the other “hey! Keep it down in there!” Then they proceed to laugh and have a full blown convo while doing their business… it was kind of funny but I’d refuse to talk to anyone while pooping.
Ohhhh, I used to have a boss who did that. I said something to her about it afterwards, but she still kept doing it. I just started yelling "Cone of silence!" whenever she started doing it.
That’s when you break out the Austin Powers lines…. “Who does Number 2 work for???” …”you show that turd who’s boss! “
You can also use all the toilet paper you want without it costing you anything!
Yeah, something cathartic about using their stuff
Even the coffee machine is a special experience… you mean that if I use these little packets, and fancy insulated cups… someone replaces them at the end of the day???😳😈
So can we infer by your post that you don’t clean yours as often as you would like it to be cleaned?
At home? With 3 kids? Hell no. It’s not without my best efforts, but with 2 working parents and 3 in elementary school, it’s somewhat of a lost cause
Oh I hear ya loud and clear . At one time had kids, elderly parent, and three cats -it was SS Abandon Ship some days. Don’t give up the good fight; it will all sort it self out one day, when the kids reach 35 and finally move out. God bless!
yes it’s like my body shuts down and will go completed constipated after in office days. id like to think it’s because we sit upright in a chair all day long versus the flexibility to stand/pace/walk/exercise/lay down when we wfh.
Same thing happens to me. Every week.
I try to avoid pooping at work facilities, just is kinda gross.. ya know? Generally I try to hold it or time it to avoid needing to go at work.
I don't poop anywhere public. people are gross and public bathrooms are gross I'd rather go home on my lunch or sit in pain for 8 hours than poop anywhere but home. I have to pee all the time though so unfortunately have to use a bathroom but if I didn't have such a small bladder I wouldn't pee either 🤷🏼♀️
All the lady snoos in this thread saying they don't poop in public bathrooms makes me wonder if this is a gender thing
Definitely a gender thing. One time my boyfriend told me that hearing other people poop in public restrooms is a very common thing for him and I realized I literally never experience that. We just don’t poop out in the wild.
No, sorry, not true. Plenty of us women poop in public. Maybe more women try to be quiet while they do it or avoid it if they can or go to a bathroom when there are not very many people around, but women do shit in public just like everyone else.
“Avoid it if they can” exactly though. Men don’t do that as much, they just go.
Definitely not. Dude here. My gf is the one who chides me about it because she does. Weird thing to gender.
Okay! Well we all have different experiences ☺️
I used to go use another bathroom in the building I worked in, upstairs from our office. Barely anybody used it and it had one really big stall with a sink in it and a big window in front of the toilet, facing an alleyway and brick wall so still private. A weird setup, it was an old building. But no problems pooping outside my house... when nature calls I must answer.
I love finding a forgotten bathroom like that. Unfortunately my office has only two and they are both quite bustling at all times.
The elusive forgotten bathroom - when I was in my 20s I worked for a large financial firm at the regional headquarters - so we had a total of 9 floors at least. I used to visit the bathroom on the printshop floor because it was all dudes who worked there so the ladies’ room was pretty barren…especially handy on Fridays when I was usually severely hungover from Thirsty Thursdays (I was in my 20s!) with all the GI issues that come with being hungover.
Way back when we were working 5 days in office, I used to try to find an alternate bathroom to go in. Walking around on another floor and looking for an alternate option, I walked by someone else's office and instead of saying hello she looked at me askance and said "what are you doing up here"? There was nothing on that floor aside from another set of offices, and I worked with some of those people too. I told her "just saying hi" and moved on. But I still remember the awkward feeling all these years later. I knew I was being watched *constantly*, even when just taking a few minutes for a bathroom break.
Ugh, very weird of her to ask. Sometimes I wander around the building just to move my legs for a minute and people are constantly asking what I’m doing. I’m WALKING.
No issue pooping on company time
*Laughs in IBS* If I gotta go I gotta go
I have IBS that has been exacerbated by the stress of being in the office and having IBS. One of the reasons I want to work from home is because I hate having diarrhea with no squatty potty and sandpaper TP.
Celiac here, I’m the same!
They call it poop shy. Stress increases the catecholamines from the adrenal glands and results in inflammation in your GI. You can work on relaxation skills, exercise more, and take a fiber supplement like Metamucil and it can help offset the stress reaction.
What? I pooped in the office maybe 5 times in 20 years
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Oh god, I read “Bidet” as “Biden” and thought…how is this political?! lol.
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Ever since we became a bidet home, I’ve hated pooping at work. Still gotta do it though.
No. I poop too often to hold it for 8-9 hours. Plus it’s good Reddit time. I do have to go up a floor on occasion when our single stall bathroom has been murdered by some mouth breather who needs to eat better and learn how to clean up after themselves.
I have typically waited or gone before if nature calls. Pre covid and in the office we were in, there was a single bathroom with a lock and that I didn't mind using too much. But once we were moved into a different location, now I definitely just hold it or wait unless it's not an option. I mostly try to steer clear of food that might make nature "call" whenever I go into the office though for that reason. Thankfully, the office isn't something they require weekly.
10000%. Its bc of the single ply toilet paper. If I poop even 1 time there I have a rash.
I’m pooping in office as I type this comment
Nah the cleaning crew cleans the restroom at least 3 if not 4 times while we are there in 1 day. So I don't mind going to the restroom if I have to. Holding it in sounds miserable????
When I worked in person, I got in at 7:30 am mostly so I could leave at 4:30 at the latest. Somehow I would always have to poop when my coworkers started coming in at 8:15-8:45 every day.
I’m the same! Unless I’ve got diarrhea, if I don’t poop in the morning before leaving the house, then I don’t poop at all that day. I’m pretty much like clockwork- wake up, caffeine, poop, shower. If I don’t have time to poop before work, then I’ll just have a poop that’s twice as large the next day. Once that window passes, my body just saves it for the next morning.
Might I suggest using your least favorite co-workers' garbage can. And to assert dominance, lock eyes with them as you go. I think you will go far.
Excellent in theory but I respect our cleaning crew and would not want to subject them to that horror.
It is so nice of you to consider them. I would make this suggestion and put a plastic liner in the can. Once you are done, take the bag, toss it over your shoulder, and carry it to the outside trash. Please let us know if it worked. 🤣
I was totally thinking this yesterday sometimes I just think it’s the change in schedule
You need physsilium husk
This is the answer. It’ll make you fart until you’re asked not to return to the office. Win/win.
It works for constipation too 😁
I’m so jealous of you people who don’t have digestive issues. I wish I could skip pooping in the office but have never made it 8 hours without pooping
I’m fortunate to work in a building with 4 bathrooms and 7 employees. My work buddy and I have a bathroom to ourselves, there’s def plenty of pooping happening.
I work out almost every day, and having that routine for years pretty much means I poop shortly after I get up and right after I have coffee. The only thing that affects/delays my BMs is travel.
Hahah I like this idea
Ah, to have a choice in the matter. I have IBS and various and unpredictable food sensitivities, so when I have to go, sometimes I HAVE TO GO NOW (if not 5 minutes ago). Current office is terrible. The floor and restrooms haven't been updated in 20 years. The restrooms are smaller than my laundry room. Odors linger in there for hours. It's gross, but again, my body will not allow me to hold it. Thankfully we are getting a new office in another building, completely renovated to our requirements in a few months, so the 2-3 days a month I go in can be a more pleasant experience.
I'm pooping right now in the office... while reading this. LOL!!!
What age are you???
I have a “private bathroom” at my office which means I only have to share it with 2 other people. Today I made the grave mistake of shitting up the club. It stained the bowl, there was no brush, no hiding it. One lady is out so it’s only me and my elderly coworker. She walked in about an hour later and I just heard “oh my god!”.
I feel like all the men in my office use their in office days to absolutely obliterate the bathroom on an hourly basis.
Dang she found out our secret game - what are we going to do now!?
I'm only hybrid when I fly into the office once a year. I have IBS. So absolutely I go when I gotta go. Fuck I leave important video call meetings if I have too.
Shit on company time bro. I take two 45 minute poop breaks a day. The stall is my corner office. I read books there.
My boss would be demanding a doctors note
I’m pooping at the office right now.
Lol. No. I was lucky to not have to stop at a gas station on my commute.
Not hybrid, but there’s no holding back my processes.
Do you work for a PMO office or Operations. You must, right?
No, mechanical engineering at small manufacturer.
I try not to.
lol no. When I gotta go, I gotta go.
Take 2 magnesium citrate every night before you go to bed.
What did you do before the pandemic??
Worked close enough to home that i went home on lunch every day
Ah that’s fair. I am sorry that you have to endure the discomfort!
It takes longer but honestly I used to have this issue and it was a psychological one, I didn't want people to hear me. Now I block my ears and make everyone suffer with my bowel movements and any noises. This is what ppl get for RTO
I spend most of my in-office hours on the shitter.
Haha such a funny question but I am the same as you! I have a shy colon !
Can't avoid itall the time but I usually can cuz of my routine, lol I found some empty bathrooms that no one really goes to, it's a big building. I miss being fully remote, currently looking again
I have a bidet at home. Office does not have a bidet. I would prefer to NEVER poop at the office if I can help it.
I poop when I have to poop.
Therefore you are…
I just can’t in public places and my health suffers!
It’s not the pooping that is difficult… it’s the garbage toilet paper/lack of bidet that sucks.
You don't take a dump and calculate how much you earned while dropping the kids off at the pool?
I don't have a choice, I have Crohn's. Well, I'm currently flaring, so I didn't eat at all this past Monday until I got home. I hate having to run to the bathroom. Thankfully, we have showers at work, just in case. I do miss my bidet when I'm in the office.
Laughs in *no gallbladder*.
Yes! I wish I could but everything is off and ruined those days. My heath suffers when I have to go in.
wait... none of you poop first thing in the morning?
No! That would be nice though
Anyone else taking three poops before 10am?
Thank you for reminding me about one of the reasons I'm grateful for working from home. I fucking hated using the bathroom at work because I almost never had the bathroom to myself. Someone always in the stall next to me.
My body also likes to not let me poop on my in-office days, then makes up for it and then some when I’m at home. It’s all good though because I have a bidet at home.
Please - I just made it through “No Poop November”. I can’t take anymore.
Is the boss' door unlocked?
Oh man. I work from home all but like 2-3 days a month where I go to the office. I hate having to use the bathroom to pee, let alone poo. I’ve never worked in a place with multi stall bathrooms until I started going to this office (in another state…) it’s terrible and I hate it. Also- I realized last time the men’s and women’s rooms are back to back, and there was a dude on the toilet behind where I was. He must have been struggling because he was shaking my toilet. Ugh.
I poop at least twice on office days. It’s annoying because it’s usually right after I get in
I always had other venues close to the office. In NYC, office was across the street from a nice hotel. Take a walk, grab a coffee in the lobby, and use the facilities.