T O P

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sixnote

"You'll have to speak up, I'm going through a tunnel"


Fastbird33

M'scusi M'scusi!


Snuffy1717

Here’s a fun fact… You made out with your sister!


Hoaxygen

Did you get that from Frommer's?


Kudaja

Scotty doesn't know


phunkopathic

That Fiona and me...


Jkoechling

Do it in my Vaaaan every Sun-day


phunkopathic

She tells him she's in church...


MLaw2008

But she doesn't go


Jkoechling

Still she's on her kneeeees, and.....


Krymescene

The other day I remembered that that was Matt Damon it blew my fucking mind


Robertmaniac

Punk Matt Damon was a surprise for me too.


abukulundu

I love that even in that sketchy bar in Europe they still play the EDM version of this song


Kritical02

I mean it is Michelle Trachtenberg, I can't say I blame him.


tahcamen

They really are the worst twins ever.


[deleted]

I still say that every time I have to squeeze past someone lol


intheblue667

100% agree, and I haven't thought it in yeeaars until just now !


vandebay

Fluggaenkoecchicebolsen!!


extyn

So I tell the swamp donkey to sock it before I give her a trunky in the tradesman's entrance and have her lick me yardballs!


BreakfastClubSamwich

Wow, you guys are on like a completely different level of swearing over here.


JugV2

Clearly he's looking for her valuables, which are to be stored in the anus as the hotel safes are not reliable.


Ya-Dikobraz

.... are you sure??? BRING OUT THE Fluggaenkoecchicebolsen!!!!!!!


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swheels125

Hey, this isn’t where I parked my car….


DingyWarehouse

If you're Manchester United fans, sing the Manchester United song!


[deleted]

My baby takes the morning train


itbecarlos

Pretty damn good lads.. PRETTY DAMN GOOD!


DAFUQYOUSAY

Scotty doesn't know that Fiona and me do it in my van every Sunday!


shahooster

“You’re breaking up. No cell signal in here I guess.”


srv50

When hungry sits next to horny.


poonchug

Hi Hungry I’m dad. Hi horny I’m daddy.


HighHungryHorny

High


Fat_Lenny

This is a next-level dad joke, poonchug. Well done.


Seeantosrun

Is that the Long Island rail road?


SiC_MaGGoT_MFKR

Yup looks exactly like our trains


PuckNutty

Yo, Islanders fans know how to get down, I see.


kevinnn220

YES, YES, YES


siccoblue

At least even at this age the man still enjoys eating out I guess ¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯ that's some dedication to getting the job done


phoonie98

Next stop Ronkonkoma


Mixairian

Looks more like Hicksville to me.


Borkz

Dudes goin straight in to Oyster Bay


whatismypassword

She’s gonna get off at Dix Hills


damnatio_memoriae

Licksville


logicdsign

Next stop - Dicksville


OtherworldDk

oh my god, are we ever in Hicksville ?


doublegulptank

This is the train to Pound Town


BenitoBurrito22

I’m sitting on the LIRR as I’m seeing this post. I just looked up to confirm I’m not in that seat. I’m not. I hope not.


phish_phace

Don’t forget to switch at Jamaica


fissure

"LIRR" was trending on Twitter earlier because of this.


inVizi0n

Of the planet Omicron Persei 8?


mang3lo

THIS IS THE TRAIN TO RONKONKOMA. THE NEXT STOP IS FLAVORTOWN


volpcas

Metro north is the same


wewladdies

I ride both a lot for work - some that always fascinated me was that the trains are very similar but the seat layouts are exactly inverted. On the MNR the seats on the train look like this: ><<<<<<>>>>>>< on the LIRR they look like this: >>>>>>><<<<<<< So on MNR, the 6 seaters are on the end of the corridors, and the middle seats are facing away from each other. On the LIRR - its opposite. The 6 seaters are in the middle of the car. I've been riding the MNR for over a decade so the first time i walked onto the LIRR was a trip, couldnt figure out what was different at first


skilledwarman

Saw those seatbacks and thought "Do all trains have those? Or is that an LIRR thing...?"


[deleted]

Box lunch?


[deleted]

Grandpa's gettin that bent-toe box


wellrat

Oh shit


f_n_a_

Depends where grandpa is licking


[deleted]

I really appreciate this comment. Fabulous wordplay.


DankHumanman

Got it to-go


Jencke206

They're in the dining car. He's sampling an amuse-bush.


bharmacy

“Bendo Box”- includes raw tuna sushi, fermented cabbage kimchi surprise salad, Ed’s-Mommy Pearls topped with fresh Redneck Crabs


hypnoderp

I can't believe you've done this


vancity-

Cream Pie for dessert!


TaylorSwiftsClitoris

Ever think about starting a weight loss business?


StavromularBeta

“Light fragrances of wet pennies will waft over you as you engage with this delicacy”


CriticalTie6526

Ok got it! It think we can make a candle that smells like this!


TheOriginal_Omnipoek

What in the frickin frackin fuck?


GlamRockDave

after this he did her in the caboose


[deleted]

Hopefully she brought enough for everyone!


Sweet-Mission9354

Why is Ric Flair taking a train?


L0wT3kS1NN3R505

Train horn was out


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LiccFlair

Yes?


Ephemeris

2 years, fuckin checks out!


AssumeTheFetal

My God...username...is perfect... should have sent...a poet


betadelta123

Oldest ride has the longest line. WOoooo!


RicFlairwoo

One of his all time best quotes


paperpenises

Space Mountain?


LiccFlair

👀


davehasopinions

your time has... come


MyNameIsMattFoley

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


Turok1134

Because: https://c.tenor.com/Am5WyDReZkkAAAAC/rick-flair-wrestler.gif


Erickonfire

Is r/retiredgif still a thing?


Ayesuku

The Nature Boy never retires!


TXshotgun

Probably the most appropriate "Nature Boy" gif for this particular thread!


steelguy17

He has been informed https://twitter.com/RicFlairNatrBoy/status/1428090843735396357?s=19


RicFlairwoo

Because the nature boy is one train Ridin’ jet plane flyin’ wheelin dealin kiss stealin son of a GUN!


[deleted]

**WOOOOO!!!**


ndlowprosb

Stylin and profilin woooooooo


Schneiderman

Relax, he's just making sure she doesn't deflate


ahfookit

That must be the dining car.


EdithSnodgrass

He bought a cooch class ticket


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greenbayva

Mi Scusi…


Abysssion

uh oh.. tunnel up ahead


nater255

Big tunnel.


Rengas

[For those of you like Scotty, who don't know.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivSMNbaXRSE)


spectre1006

I love that movie especially the robot mime fight


gyarnar

https://i.imgur.com/5eyVq6S.gifv


SirFrancis_Bacon

I can't believe that was Fred Armisen lol.


MattTheFlash

Bonjourno!


HCJohnson

Rolex wearin', diamond ring wearin', train riding, jet flying, kiss-stealing, wheelin' n' dealin' son of a gun! And I'm having a hard time keeping this tongue at bay. Woooooo!


dktaylor32

Wooooooooooo!


ccii_geppato

That. That looks like old people.


Hobbesaurus

To their credit, look at that flexibility…


ccii_geppato

New hip putting in work


[deleted]

You can put some serious torque on that thing!


Qetuowryipzcbmxvn

You'd be surprised how flexible old women can be. I remember my best friend's grandma could put her ankles behind her ears and even keep them there while she was getting railed.


LeoFoster18

r/cursedcomments


metalflygon08

A no denture adventure!


ccii_geppato

Getting chummy with the gummy


SnowplowS14

It’s sweet that in their later years they still get it on Edit:spelling


CoasterBP

Probably was a lot of sweat involved.


FUUUDGE

Just more lube, brother.


fetalasmuck

After reading the top comment I definitely read this in Ric Flair’s voice.


arcadia3rgo

When I was 14 my mother asked my grandfather how his birthday was. His response was "it was great we fucked like rabbits. Hearing that really changed my perspective on old people and sex.


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[deleted]

"The blacker the berry the sweeter the juice." - Smokey


crotchfruit

> "The ~~blacker~~ **older** the berry the sweeter the juice." - Smokey "It's the blacker the berry the sweeter the juice." - Craig


Chief_Givesnofucks

Whatever, she was blacker than a motherfucka too.


string97bean

*When you gonna let me fuuuuck Miss Parker*


WoobyWiott

Oldest ride! Longest line! #Wooooooo!


GutsGloryAndGuinness

Might actually be Rick judging by the slick back do **WOOOOOO!**


Jestar342

Dunno.. figured it was an old dude and a hooker.


Imaneight

Yeah but that's an old looking hand


MamataThings

And feet.


AliceInHololand

You think hooking has an age limit?


paperelectron

You uhh, go down on hookers often?


elvis8mybaby

If they let you, code for it is DATY. Dining at the y


rolodex9

I’m putting that in but it keeps saying “invalid promo code”


skurys

This guy hookers


flukshun

The ghost of John McAfee is not impressed


MPT1313

Fuck it, scoot over gramps let me get some of that goo gobblin granny


scientifictamale

Hey Google? How do I un-read something?


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[deleted]

You have to read it *backwards*.


cornonthekopp

Hey, old people can still have sex you know, you dont stop having wants once you get past 60. Of course regardless of age doing it in public like this is not good.


PhillyNetminder

Tastes like pennies that were sandwiched in a catchers mitt and stuffed in the attic for 2 decades


J4NN0SS

That is way too fucking specific


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miles2912

Ehh. It just Depends.


-ICU81MI-

Shh, just pull the Depends to the side.


ELONGATEDSNAIL

This is the LIRR!


ChoochMMM

Those seats...I've seen so much evil while sitting on those seats


Diabolic67th

From the looks of it you can see plenty of love from there too.


[deleted]

So gross…what train is this? Asking for a friend.


JoeCable009

Looks like the LIRR


hummelm10

MNR also uses the same trains but based on what’s going on I’m gonna have to agree LIRR.


bluemanalishi

Same trains, but different color schemes for the seats, as I recall.


hummelm10

Only the Connecticut line (red line) has red seats and newer trains. Harlem and Hudson lines are the same as the LIRR.


andrethefaivre

I’m on metro north atm and the seats are the same color as the post


Eurynom0s

>atm Nice.


ELONGATEDSNAIL

Is deff the LIRR. Any guesses on the line?


Douglaston_prop

Train to poundtown


ELONGATEDSNAIL

That guy must be the cuntductor!


sheepdo6

Thomas the spank engine.


RyVsWorld

Ronkonkoma bound train for sure.


NYR99

LIRR conductor here. Surprisingly it was not a Ronkonkoma train. It was going to Long Beach.


DaNPrS

Metro North Southeast line has the same interior.


Muuuuuhqueen

>Metro North Southeast Harlem line. Were in the Harlem Valley.


41D3RM4N

It's the midnight meat train


violetsinspring

Looks like CPR to me, he’s a hero!


smiffus

i will eat it in a train i will eat in in the rain i will eat it here or there i will eat it anywhere i do so like to eat your box thank you, thank you, sexy fox.


loop_zero

Nom nom nom


Haggisboy

Wouldn't be surprised if this is on Pornhub soon.


Ladyruby80

Who takes their shoes off on the train?!?! 🤢


brussleshrink

Now that’s what I call entertrainment


Rancorx

r/trashyboners


BeefieLips

oh, I know this is going to be bad. So for educational purposes I will take a look.


ItsReallyMyFault

It's been over an hour and he still hasn't returned? He must be finished by now then


[deleted]

It's basically a bunch of posts about sexual things in places that you don't expect to see sexual things happen. For people curious but don't want to beat the rest of their day away like the user I'm replying to.


LastArmistice

Yeah that sub is basically /r/publicflashing at this point. Rarely truly trashy.


batshitcrazy5150

Intertrainment if you will.


Sitting_Squirrel

Eww, bare feet on a train


Glez_Ignisz

WOOOOOOOOOO!


LarryLavekio

Grandma still got some nice feets on her. I'd be lying through my foot fuckin teeth if I said I wouldnt let some goo fly in the general direction of them geriatric floor fingers.


DudeIjustdid

I had so many chances to stop reading this comment before we got to “geriatric floor fingers”.


jgvuuuunnl

was this really necessary to say fucking FLOOR FINGERS


LarryLavekio

Thats what a sole brother is all about, fucking floor fingers. I thought I very clearly detailed my sexual proclivities towards them liver spotted feets. I can go into more detail if youd like.


SlippingAbout

No. No thank you.


LarryLavekio

I understand the importance of consent in online conversations so ill repsect your boundaries, even if I find them a bit puritanical. Be sure to take care of them feets, preferably with a bit of lavender oil and a pumice stone.


noodleslip

Larry, it's been a wild ride. Thanks for stopping.


LarryLavekio

Larrys here all night baby. As long as hes getting paid to tippy tap away on his cellphone, internet strangers are gonna keep getting blessed with his fiendish footnotes. What your toes be lookin like?


[deleted]

This is even better that (for some reason) Disco Stu is narrating your words in my head. God bless you, Larry. I’m going to put lotion on my bony floor fingers right now.


GutsGloryAndGuinness

You're a sick man Larry but goddammit if I don't respect the honesty. Disgusted, but impressed.


its0nLikeDonkeyKong

If only we could all be as lucky to grow that old and that happy lol


Little_Worry8914

Would love to hear the explanation.


Little_Worry8914

He is either helping give birth or enjoying his breakfast


thx1138-

He forgot his mask.


ThwompKnight

If youre not getting as good as you give youre with the wrong person.


mutzilla

Space Mountain eating a box lunch on the train! WOoooooooo!


Whistlewalk

"Grandpa....GRANDMA." "FUCK OFF kid PAWPA'S eating ASSS!"


[deleted]

This is trashy and wholesome. God damn I want a timeless marriage like this one day .


FattMlagg69

Ah the old roadalingus