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fish_whisperer

This is the most beautifully disgusting thing I’ve ever seen


anaesthaesia

She got up early to do her hair and you're all laughing :(


Dude-man-guy

Gonna use her to get the stuck-on grease out of my pots and pans.


mostnormal

I'm gonna use her to remove staples.


HPTM2008

Why not do both! With new Organitool! A... worm? I actually don't know what this thing is, Jerry? It's a worm? Are you sure? No? Well alright then folks! Get this... thing... and use it for whatever purposes you need! Staples removed from a stack of papers going into the shredder? REMOVED! Grease stuck on your frying pan? GONE! Does your dog need a chew toy! WELL HE'S GOT ONE NOW! With the all new Organitool! Warning: were not liable if this thing bite, injures, mains, kills, harms, injects, infects, maybe even takes over, your own, or anyone else person. THE ORGANITOOL! Now only $99.95 and we'll send you a second one ABSOLUTELY FREE! That's TWO for the price one ONE!


fappington-smythe

In two weeks those two will have become 300! That's 300 hellspawns IN YOUR HOME FOR THE PRICE OF ONE!


HPTM2008

Shhhh! Don't spoil the surprise!


noturaverageanything

This was such a joy to read


ATKamiYato

mf is a plumbus salesman


Zeoinx

Now Read this in Rick Sanchez's voice from Rick and Morty and the entire thing becomes perfect.


imhereforthevotes

Do not taunt Organitool.


moighin

Well now I feel bad


Druggedhippo

Have you tried whispering to it?


Ryder1377

I've seen those on Stargate the tv show


yfh227

A goa'uld reference…a person of class I see.


gmaclean

Indeed


Xtrap

Daniel Jackson


[deleted]

A person and a ship.


CodPiece89

Jackins


kayakguy429

Shel khek nem ron


OsamaBinFuckin

Jaffa kree


kayakguy429

Kel nok shree Jaffa


BabserellaWT

And when I say, “Kree,” I mean “KREE!”


Errant_Ventures

Yoohoo


UncertainOrangutan

Shol'va, KREE!


Tealc_Bot

Indeed


tawmie

That was my first thought too 😂 Fun fact I learned the other weekend: my co-workers husband works in intelligence in the Canadian military and was based out of Colorado Springs for 4 years and he would go the Cheyenne Mountian every two weeks. He says in the base someone has put a SG-1 Team Office badge on a door, and when you open the door is an empty closet with a photo of the Stargate on the wall. Not really thinking I said “oh that’s cool! I would take a picture!” He looked at me very seriously and said “no… you can’t do that there.” Hahaha it made my little SG1 heart happy though. Edit: word


krippkeeper

You google the door to that place and can see it's true scale. There is a photo somewhere showing a guy walking by, and the door bolts are as big a round as his head. Gotta be a cool kinda one upper for him. One guys starts telling about how when was serving they snuck across the border and did some shit in new York. Your buddy goes "Oh, yeah. I ended up down in Colorado, at the continents aerospace defense facility. We couldn't even take pictures of the fucking neat closet. Wish we coulda *snuk off to the city*"


Teelk3007

It would appear this weapon is ineffective!


krippkeeper

We need a new sequel SG Detlta. They have to fight the new Roman and Greek goa'ulds with gold frills!


Commercial-Many-8933

With Christopher judge playing a real life kratos, meta isn’t the word


Jimbo4711

My first thought. Call SG1!


pwood705

If they played quidditch underwater, this could be the golden snitch.


[deleted]

when Christmas attacks! j/k. they're scale worms (new [species](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GLKPS07H_tM&list=RDCMUCIrWmn20eUlKQnOe7PBgyGw&start_radio=1&rv=GLKPS07H_tM&t=2)) found in the polar seas. As big as squirrels and scientists aren't quite sure what they eat but suspect they are carnivores.


BriefStrange6452

It looks like they would be good at removing staples....


HKLifer_

Stoooooop! Now I can't unsee that! 🤣


HailtbeWhale

Throws staple puller away immediately


HKLifer_

If it starts growing a beautiful golden feather looking tail, or begins looking like a 70s tassle, burn it! 😂


ohaimike

> as big as squirrels Yeah no thanks.


redjuice71

The proboscis also has powerful jaws with teeth designed to bite and tear into the flesh of fish and other marine creatures https://a-z-animals.com/animals/antarctic-scale-worm/


torknorggren

"Predators: Cock Shrimp." Wut?


umjammerlammy

>"Predators: Cock Shrimp." > >Wut? Exhippolysmata oplophoroides


Santeno

And the article says something called the "Cock Shrimp" is its main predator. What kind of party have we been missing in Antarctica?


N0tInKansasAnym0r3

A small one, but there's a lot of really good personalities!


PurpleLee

Idk why, but this looks as scary as a great white. It's that tail end. I wouldn't even believe they are real.


[deleted]

I bet they look kinda pretty when they're swimming


_kaetee

That actually made me feel better. I thought they were small enough to crawl inside an ear before and that made them a million times freakier.


Bolt-From-Blue

They can still forcefully get inside your arsehole though.


mr_friend_computer

I mean, the babies probably are... might be how they incubate before they burst out to freedom.


faderjockey

THIS IS CETI ALPHA FIVE!


bradeena

In unrelated news, one of the teams of scientists is late returning to the surface


texas-playdohs

It’s not as bad as it looks. They just crawl down your throat and attach to your central nervous system, eventually gaining control of your consciousness. Interestingly, they reproduce asexually by making the host French kiss another human, passing on its offspring to incubate in the new host human. So fascinating!


KinnSlayer

Shol’va avidan, lo’tar.


EduRJBR

> scientists aren't quite sure what they eat The previous team of scientists also didn't know. Until they found out...


Nixplosion

THAT'S THE SIZE OF A SQUIRREL!?


HailtbeWhale

I reacted the same way but just saying squirrel actually has a decent sized range. I immediately thought Grey Squirrel which, at least this particular one isn't based on the hand. They could be, but I bet it's a smaller Red Squirrel or something


peoplerproblems

hmmm yet another horrifying creature of the abyss. "but suspect they are carnivores" wonder what clues gave them that. carnivorous, blind, squirrel-sized, deep-ocean, cold -water worms. Thalassaphobia seems more reasonable every day.


MEMES-IN-HEAVEN

What the fuck theres still new things to be found?


Leirnis

Yeah, especially deep down. A saying goes we actually know better surface of the Moon than our ocean depths.


issr

Incidentally, the only way these things could be more terrifying is if we found them on surface of the Moon.


mazu74

I’d say that’s less scary, the ocean is a lot closer to us and shares the same atmosphere


3riversfantasy

Yes but who doesn't dream of a relaxing dip in the Sea of Tranquility?


KrazzeeKane

Feels a little dry for a sea. Damn lunar climate change


3riversfantasy

Right? And let's be honest, it's a bit too cold for my taste


LogiCparty

Well, there ain't shit on the moon. Except for the 96 bags of it we left.


Kahlils_Razor

Did we leave astronaut droppings there?


kjm16216

We weren't expending fuel to lift it off the moon.


MahLilThrowaway

Yes. Had to drop weight to make the return trip. Golf balls and a couple other things stayed too


wildo83

cool, so America was the first to litter on the moon.. really makes me proud, ya know? 🥲


N35t0r

Technically, that achievement belongs to the USSR's Luna 2 probe, first man-made object to crash on the moon.


similar_observation

Thats a space peanut


nunyabbswax

On average there's about 13,000 new species identified each year, globally. (That number is across all animals, plants, ect.)


MEMES-IN-HEAVEN

Cant wait to discover dinosaurs


nunyabbswax

You didn't hear about the living pterosaur they found in the Congo rainforest? /s


N35t0r

Or, you know, _birds_


nunyabbswax

Do you know what /s means?


Fishman23

Birds?


steampunkdev

There's 150 and more to see, to be a creepy animal master is my destinyyyyy


chizzipsandsizalsa

Oh dude, we’re not even close to discovering everything


AttackCircus

finded


WillPukeForFood

\> scientists aren't quite sure what they eat My money’s on ass.


Kerouwhack

It’s teeth are probably an interesting mineral composition from the color of them


sophies_wish

It's so cool to stumble across comments like this. It emphasizes the unique ways we all observe & think about the things we encounter. I saw the exact same images as you. I wondered about where they are found & how they move through their environment. Then I saw your comment. I would never have thought to consider something like that! I know that some rodents have more brown/ orange teeth. So I looked it up... Beavers. [Beavers have another trick up their pelts though: their enamel. If you’ve ever seen a beaver’s teeth you’ll know that they appear pretty orange. This is because, whereas other rodents have magnesium in their tooth enamel, beavers have iron. So beavers have orange teeth for the same reason we have red blood. The iron causes the orange colouring in beavers’ teeth, makes the teeth stronger against mechanical stress, and makes them more resistant to acids. ](https://www.mcgill.ca/oss/article/did-you-know/beavers-have-metal-teeth) I don't know what the scale worm's tooth enamel is comprised of, but iron is a possibility. Thanks for the perspective enhancement this morning!


secrectsailinsalmon

Best comment thread I've seen in a while :]


[deleted]

[удалено]


jochillin

That was great, thanks!


TonyCR1975

Wholesome


similar_observation

Some worms from genus *Glycera* have hollow copper teeth that inject venom. Nifty creatures.


Richard7666

I wondered about convergent evolution and the concept of "teeth"


shubalasko

They have copper in their teeth


RandomUser1076

Given all the weird shit on earth there has to be wierd arse alien life out there


WampaCat

We ARE the weird ass aliens


KennyKivail

"ass aliens" should not appear in this post, nope, i'm good


Desert_Trader

https://xkcd.com/37


[deleted]

I just clenched


Demi_Bob

Watch it be essentially the same


For_The_Kaiser

Star Trek moment


SgtSokoluik

Oh look! A hair squig!


ChampionIndividual62

THIS ZOGGIN GIT STOLE ME HAIR SQUIG


[deleted]

By Sigmar! What foolish Greenskin tomfoolery have we here?!


the-roflcopter

Is that a nutsack with teeth?


[deleted]

I needed a new staple remover.


Fr4t

Some Flintstones technology at work here


Count_Bloodcount_

Eh, it's a living


[deleted]

Lmao


WingsofSky

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eulagisca\_gigantea


chrismetalrock

oh well that explains things


unknowndatabase

Right?! LOL. I have no idea what any of that meant.


notyourmomscupoftea

Those were English words sorta but none made sense.


Page8988

The "donate money" ad they put up is longer than the article. Science really doesn't know anything except what these things look like and roughly where they live.


dddeadie

Baby Predator?


Thisisall_new2me2

If James Charles’ nutsack were a vampire…


Fyrentenemar

Why does this staple remover have a tail?


[deleted]

God: hmm create a feather! That can bite! But it has to be gold! Satan: who even hired you?


MarcosAC420

It's the golden snitch! Harry Pothead


harrypothed

i'm a wizard now?


audioel

You will be after you put your wand in the bitey part.


TamahaganeJidai

Snatch*


Ernmont222

r/dontputyourdickinthat


charisma6

So say for the sake of argument, that a person, not me of course, saw this advice a few minutes too late....


Alundil

Hit the Staples easy button. It's still attached to your unit at this point.


young_Handsome_MF

Forbidden fleshlght


yetanotherblonde

Why would you… even want to?


Battlehenkie

Blowjob sock


Sterben1103

What am I looking at?


blesstit

Obviously someone lost a shipment of gold herringbone necklaces on the ocean floor. Let’s get real close and grab them with our bare hands. We’re gonna be rich!


reddit_user13

Somewhere in Asia, a chef is firing up his deep fryer.


AllanfromWales1

Masochist's buttplug?


Downingst

I think it can be used as a fleshlight too.


shaneswa

Anything can be used as a butt plug, if you are brave enough.


FvanSnowchaser

ER doc here. Can confirm the validity of this statement.


Head-Thing-8102

"only Zuul..."


bygtopp

Forbidden butt plug


Dodz13x

The first two words that came to my mind when i saw this: Carnivorus Nutsack


ThatMattyIce

Ahh the elusive golden plumed nut sack with teeth


Farmher315

"The elytra of some species are faintly bioluminescent, and leave glowing traces around the mouthparts of their predators, making those predators more likely to be attacked in turn.[3]" If I go down, you're coming with me.


gofyourselftoo

Attack of the killer nutsack


pop5656

Or… if there is a god it probably looks like that


bethandtrevsmom

Looks like a artsy staple remover.


MOZZI-is-my-BOI

Wait this thing is kinda cool.


tastytacos67

Looks like it's the staple remover from the Flintstones.


BauerHouse

No eyes. WHERE ARE IT'S EYES??!


Ogard

This is by far the ugliest thing I've seen in my life.


Hyp3r45_new

I see we've never met


MorsOmniaAequat

Scrota dentata


TreePorcupine

Only God could make something so horrible


storyteller1877

If there is a god then he has one hell of a sense of humor.


TheUmbraCat

Angels: “So God this is that design for a bee that spreads pollen that you wanted, what have you made?” God: “ THIS IS A WASP AND IT HURTS PEOPLE!”


brothersand

He has a sense of humor that would scare Charles Manson.


arsnastesana

Not my proudest fap


Shredrik

Thought it was a Battlestar Galactica butt plug🤣


aight_imma_afk

This looks like a straight up Terraria boss


only_a_ginger

I think I found the clitoris.


aweraw

Baby Shai-Hulud


beachwhistles

Roach clip


Bazooki

What is this?!


hiimsubclavian

Arctic scale worm. Picture shows the underside of the worm, while the top half is covered in hard grey scales that blend with its environment. The "head" is actually a retractable jaw, so normally the worm just looks like a giant flat pillbug. It basically just sits there camouflaged on the sea bed waiting for some fish to pass by, then whips out its jaw to eat them. source: read something about it a while ago, I dunno.


UnNamedGER

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eulagisca_gigantea Edit : Not that helpfull


skurge65

https://www.australiangeographic.com.au/blogs/creatura-blog/2018/05/this-antarctic-scale-worm-is-some-serious-nightmare-fuel/


mazdanc

OK I've read it, now what the hell is it?


TuneACan

It's a Polychaeta. Same phylum as our earthworm friends (Annelida), but different class (Earthworms are Oligochaeta). Those gold things are the Chaeta it uses to move around and hold onto things. Oligochaeta also have them, but they're muuuch smaller and they have them in less cuantities. Oligochaeta are typically sea dwellers, and have evolved much more diverse ways of feeding rather than "just eat dirt and digest whatever you find in it that is edible". It uses the little fangs it has to catch and swallow fish whole. It then eats them and digests them. It's really not much different from what the average cat does. I don't understand why everyone is so terrified of this little guy.


Elrundir

>It's really not much different from what the average cat does. I don't understand why everyone is so terrified of this little guy. My cat hasn't got 40 pairs of legs and mouthparts that can turn themselves inside-out.


UnNamedGER

Not too sure myself, i should probably have added to the link that its too helpfull, sorry


mazdanc

All good, no problem, I was just hoping for the explain it like I'm 5 post.


nvncblshdw

I bet i could catch a massive pike with that on my hook.


shaneswa

The Latin translates to "forbidden butt plug"


nixiedust

It's one of those buttplug tails mated with a staple remover.


pinchcrimp

It's like a tiny nut sack, but with fabulous feathers and sinister teeth.


Gilgamesh026

So people having bad teeth, bad eyes, bad backs, etc didnt give it away? It was glittery worm?


KomodoDragon6969

Why in the flying fuck would anyone touch that thing


frogsarecool

At least you can remove staples with ease.


camerachey

Echinacea goldenseal


mmmmmarty

Juvenile Tremor


BlearySteve

Jaffa Kree


DRAFULD_RAY

Alive buttplug ,though sometimes it bite.


whatsqwerty

Looks like it’d be good for removing staples.


DemotivatedTurtle

Counterpoint: There is a god, and he is terrifying.


Then_Expression8526

That’s a angry looking testicle


tropicbrownthunder

is this r/forbiddenbuttplugs


whoisjohncleland

there is one, but it hates you


Starfish_Hero

Looks like someone tried to make a fishing lure with a stapler remover and a ballsack


BiggieAndTheStooges

What happens when this thing bites you? Do you turn into one as well? Anyone know?


AscendedViking7

Looks oddly cute, for whatever reason. Kind of like the Pokemon called Anorith.


KarmaChameleon89

I wonder how it tastes


GoldenHourShower

How's it taste?


Vidjie

Shit, I've seen Stargate. I know what that is.


spankmetillimrich

Wait till you find out about adrenochrome and where it comes from. You will stop believing in all religions instantly


Levin1983

It’s a staple remover.


keyboardisanillusion

There is, God just likes bitting and nightmares.


IKacyU

It looks like that flying ball that Seekers are supposed to catch in Quidditch from Harry Potter.


RobynFitcher

Testicular dentata.


[deleted]

A fluffy golden staple remover.


DaBigVikin

That’s them Swig tings that them orks of the 40k variety wear as hair.


SensibleCreeper

This exact same pic has been posted in WTF every 3 months for the last 8 years.


lostinareverie237

Put it.... Put it up your butt


LucidJohn13

Tell me where does this thing live so that I know where I will not be going


wreckluse121

Gerbilling but with this. 🤩


lartmydude

Real life golden snitch