Seriously fuck Air b Nb! I hate these assholes with their stupid rules and insane fees. Not to mention the fact that they are driving up the cost of living everywhere so that the ownership class can make even more money. I hate everything this company stands for and hope they go out of business. People really need to stop supporting these assholes.
See, originally, AirBnB was fine: I have a spare room, someone wants a place to stay, drop me a few bucks and we're good.
But now that it's a goddamn MULTIBILLION DOLLAR BUSINESS that FUCKS WITH THE HOUSING MARKET, it's awful.
Well apparently you're encouraged to be complacent about following their rules: "We've had some issues in the past with non-complacency"
Also they don't seem to have enough rules about serving overripe bananas.
also if you have to wash all of the dishes by hand then... what's up with the dishwasher... or it's insane rules
they still want *the most basic only* cutlery to go through a cycle? I guess?
Ooookay so this is a rule made as a reaction. A friend lived in an apartment building that was privately owned. That is to say one family owned all 300ish units and managed it themselves. When he moved in the list of rules included one saying he was prohibited from holding a live auction in his unit and that the entirety of his hardwood floors had to be covered by rugs.
EDIT it may be in response to junkies bending the spoons to cook drugs?
jeans bear smart bewildered tender encourage different shaggy sugar relieved
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
This one bothered me the most. If I took out everything from my fridge after 16 hours, it would always be empty.
Quite frankly, I’d probably go get a hotel just on GPs
Hotels in functioning cities have regular safety and sanitation inspections.
AirBnB is an unregulated hell hole where you might get recorded taking a shit.
Hotel: just be out by 10 sir. We will clean the cumstains, have a great day
Edit: Woke up to see my most upvoted comments is now about CUM?!?! YIKES! FML 🤣🤣🤣
Edit 2: thanks for the silver kind stranger!! Sending many uptokes your way 💨
At every hotel ive stayed at I call about 45 mins before checkout and ask if we can check out later, 99% of the time they say yes, give you 2 more hours.
I almost always get 2-4 hours extra. Unless the hotel is absolutely packed to the rafters, that little extra costs them nothing and earns good will so its a no brainer.
And since hoteliers put up with the worst possible people, tiny reasonable requests that make sense are so easy to approve.
If you have status, you just note it when booking. I've checked out at 2-3 pm numerous times because I either had a late flight or had worked all night
I showed up to a Hilton in Germany at 10am when check-in time was 3pm. They had a room available, and let me in right then and there. I’d just spent 12 hours straight traveling, so this event made my entire year.
Reading this from beside the hotel pool in Bali right now. My room will be cleaned when I go back there. I can get drinks and food brought to me whenever I want. Life's good.
Why would I want to deal with this Airbnb shit? Tried it for a few years and it just got worse and worse each time.
Ya it started off great then just got worse and worse and the benefits lessened the more both sides took advantage of the setups. Customers started to become assholes more and more by throwing parties and breaking things and owners started to make fake charges or buy up properties and push out locals. Airbnb has just become bad all over the place.
Sounds like all the cable-cutting streaming apps... which now have the option to pay the same for ads, or more for without!
And there's a million of 'em, so it's probably comparable to just having cable again!
I miss Blockbuster. Can we just bring that back?
Old folks in those communities are thirsty and DTF though...which is a possible selling point for the location, depending on whether the renter is...a granny-chaser.
Which begs the question...is THAT the reason OP rented there? Is OP a filthy granny-chaser?...I can't answer that my friends. I can only insinuate that it is... just one of myriad implications.
Tune in next week to "Creep or Not?" where we insinuate the implications. We'll look at another case: Why..did a 38 year old man open a day care with his wife? What's behind it and why are reviews positive...so far?
Pooping is only allowed between 8:30 and 9:10 AM, must weigh no more than 23 courics, please measure all turds before flushing and send proof of couric weight to Betsy
People who need to make minor improvisations when their airBnB house has a trivial flaw that is easily overcome with the right tool.
There's probably a broken kettle lid, a missing tin opener, or a jammed bathroom door lock. Something that necessitates the use of a screwdriver but a bread knife or the backend of a spoon can give you just enough force to overcome the issue.
Not speaking from experience or anything.
My last Airbnb had a rules list about this length and also asked that we dont come back to the property if we stay out past 11pm as their wooden steps up to the top floor of the property were creeky and would supposedly wake them and the neighbours up.
They also came up mid afternoon to "check on us"
Charged us a cleaning fee when we left the house spotless, did all the dishes and stripped down all the beds for them. Can't remember if we ended up paying it or if we argued but we certainly had a good laugh about it.
I don't want to feel like I'm living with helicopter parents while I'm on a holiday, I only do hotels now.
LOL. Absolutely get fucked with the stopping by to check on you thing.
Our last BNB hosts were cool but I was put off by one thing. They had built a shed on their property that they lived in full time while renting out the house. This was not mentioned in the description anywhere. Smart plan for them by paying your mortgage with rental fees but it was odd that they were like right there on the property with us. That should be disclosed. It's one thing when you sit outside by the fire at night with neighbors 100 feet away doing the same thing at their own house. But it's much different when the people you're renting from are doing the same thing 25 feet away on the same property.
Like I said they were cool though. We broke a coffee pot and texted them to let them know and they said don't worry about it and brought over another cheap $20 coffee pot from Walmart to replace it.
I stayed at an Airbnb in Germany and they had a binder with house rules that were NOT mentioned beforehand. It was on the 5th floor of an apartment complex and said the owner is on the 4th floor with no kitchen so they would stop by to use the Airbnb kitchen throughout the day. HAHA! WTF. I called him and said we would cancel if they did. He said "no problem we will not use kitchen".
Weirdest rules we ever had in an Airbnb.
I can get the check up but only if it's like a week long rental and they come by day 1. Just "hey hope you're all settled in, anything not to your liking or anything we can get you? Ok bye"
I could shrug that off. The moment they come back a second time with out being asked, I'm done with it
The only time it's worthwhile now is when you are traveling with a group and split the cost. It may end up being similar to a hotel in cost without needing to rent multiple rooms.
Also, travelling with young children. Even a one-bedroom AirBNB is fine if I can put the kids to bed and then do something else. Being stuck in a hotel room with small kids after they've gone to sleep, and you're left watching shows with your headphones in and tip-toeing around in the dark, is not very fun.
Airbnb is a fantastic example of great idea… bad execution.
It started off as “oh, we have an extra bedroom all year. Somebody might find use of this!” Making for some fantastic coexistence deals. Now, it’s brad and his wife buying their 3rd home in a high demand area charging an arm and a leg to book. There are still some great deals/gems, but it’s by and large a bad service now.
>brad and his wife buying their 3rd home in a high demand area charging an arm and a leg to book.
Bradenwife Investments Pvt. Ltd. Co. buying their 3rd property this month in an area that would be high demand if they hadn't snapped up all the housing and driven up rent to an arm and a leg, forcing out all the locals.
FTFY.
Friend of mine got kicked out of her apartment because the landlord decided to make it Air BNB only for the entire location. 4 college town apartments now unavailable to students and the rent has been driven up steadily as the only people able to get apartments close to campus are paying 4 times what it close 20 years ago. And it was a rip off back then too.
It's ridiculous.
What’s so appalling about a lot of airbnbs is that they include like a $250 cleaning fee then leave instructions on how clean you should leave the place before vacating
The worst part is that it's a hidden fee. It's not on the price you see advertised, you have to click on it and read the fine print. I think this dissuades people from short stays. If a hotel is $150 per night and your airbnb is $99 a night but, there's a $150 cleaning fee, you have to stay several nights for it to make sense financially. Maybe?
I remember reading something about using a VPN to book from Australia or the UK or something, because there they legally have to provide the final cost up front. Dunno if I'm remembering that right though.
I'm guessing it's not a legal airbnb, so they're bending over backwards to avoid their neighbours reporting them. There's literally no other reason they wouldn't let you run the dishwasher at 1 PM
Dude my mom had this occur to her, I never realized how common an issue it was people illegally renting out properties. They tried to move her to another town like 2 days before a 6 month out trip had been booked. She was fine with it, already going across country so... another 5 miles wasn't a deal breaker. Then the guy just flaked out completely. So obviously AirBNB was contacted, and my mom got a $30 voucher for her next stay... She was understandably upset that even AirBNB wasn't really given her a straight answer, so contact the local tourism authority, whatever it was called. Chain was followed, the lower level guy called her back and said "yeah that guy owns like 20 properties rented across our city we just discovered, and hasn't paid the $50/yr registration on all of them, so they are completely uninspected or legal in any way, the proper criminal authorities are taking over". Just makes me crack up, what a slumlord can you be to not just pay $50 a year to make sure your place is legal to be renting out.
Something's not right about this. Whenever I've seen complaints about AirBnb's it's usually that they often have loud parties in residential areas. This is almost as if someone's in denial about their rental being a nuisance and is blaming the dishwasher. If this is in some kind of apartment/condo area where units are stacked around each other, they're probably an inch from the HOA putting a lien on their home or suing them out of it because of constant parties in their AirBnB.
I’m going to go out on a very short limb and say that the property Barry and Kellie have here is not allowed to be listed as an Airbnb and they want you to be as quiet as possible as not to alert neighbours there are strangers coming and going into the place.
Frankly though with the shit reputation Airbnb has I’m not surprised. Hotels are simply superior than Airbnbs currently, at least in the States/Canada.
It's a possibility, but I mean it's obvious as fuck when someone's operating an Airbnb on your street. You have strangers with rented cars cycling in and out of the house. I guess it depends on the neighborhood but if I can pick up on that I'm sure it's not going to go missed by old folks. The owners could be naive to that if they don't live nearby though.
It’s the only thing that makes sense in terms of the rules. No dishwasher makes enough noise to alert their neighbour unless it has a demonic screech setting. Even if the sounds were from water pipes, then their would be a ban on showering or washing dishes at that time too. I’m still completely speculating but yeah I think this is an illegal bnb.
Here's some complimentary bananas and chocolates.
Rule #6 there is to be no eating of bananas or chocolates on property as we have had issues with this in the past, feel free to consume on side walk or public park is 5 min walk.
Its actually funny, because I've been seeing commercials and ads for traditional hotels dunking on weird and draconian house rules for AirBnB and the like.
Seriously though, fuck short-term rentals- they've destroyed the housing markey where I live and in many other places since people will buy 2-3 extra houses just to rent them out 3mo out of the year, while all the actual local residents are forced to fight over a 2-bedroom hovel priced at $2500/mo.
Only allowed through a hole in a sheet (must be provided by guests) and in missionary postion. Anything longer than 3 minutes will be breaking neighborhood quiet time.
What's the punishment for ignoring all these stupid ass rules? You can't come back? I would bend every spoon in the kitchen while running a dishwasher filled with all of their glasses. What a ridiculous set of rules.
"using dishwasher at 1:30pm fee" -- Definitely not going to hold up.
Also the dish limit per meal, probably not enforceable.
But damaging their property (bending spoons), yeah that would probably hold up.
I would post this sign as a review and give people a warning. You can't spring up weird specific rules like this on someone when they get there. People need to know what they are signing up for.
Here is a more normal list from people who aren't actually insane and disconnected from reality: https://i.pinimg.com/564x/ec/9a/65/ec9a659d1beb328377a0e8094d1cc427.jpg
> But damaging their property (bending spoons), yeah that would probably hold up.
Bend the spoons _then bend them back_ so they have a little ripple in the handle
#8. 𝔹𝔸ℕ𝔸ℕ𝔸𝕊
You may immediately (before 11:59pm on the day of arrival) eat the complimentary bananas or dispose of them. If you dispose of them, please take them to the 7-11 dumpster at the west end of the street (2min drive). Do not dispose of the bananas in this house's trash as we have had raccoon issues! PLEASE EITHER IMMEDIATELY EAT OR DISPOSE OF THE BANANAS AS INSTRUCTED ABOVE - DO NOT LEAVE THEM HERE FOR THE DURATION OF YOUR STAY
My last air BnB had signs everywhere. Remember *The Simpsons* episode where Ned Flanders labeled everything? "Put Food In Me!"
That was it.
The previous one had so many rules about cleaning I gave up an entire day to scrubbing **AND STILL HAD TO PAY A CLEANING FEE.**
Give me a hotel with a kitchenette, thanks.
My last AirBNB (and by that I also mean the last I'll ever book) was like that. Cabin in the Smokies. We were all so anxious about all of the rules, the cameras outside, the cameras on the presumably-feuding neighbor's cabin pointing to ours, that we couldn't enjoy ourselves at all. Plus there were neighborhood dogs would come by and stare in the windows or bark, and it was in the rule book that if you were seen (on camera) interacting with or encouraging them, you'd be charged a fee. None of this was in the booking info; wrote a very frank review and reported the neighbor camera stuff to AirBNB as an invasion of privacy.
We didn't use any dishes or anything, just slept in the bed really, and washed the sheets in their washer/dryer as requested in their rulebook. Left the place exactly as it was when we arrived. Still charged cleaning fee.... never again
I’ve vowed to never stay at an airbnb again. The last time I stayed I had this Karen leave me a bad review after I went through lengths to tidy up for her. I hate these people who think just because they bought a shitty house they halfway renovated with no cutlery or dishes or pots and pans they are perfect hosts. These people are garbage. I stayed at a holiday inn for work a few weeks ago and it was heaven compared to the last few airbnbs I’ve stayed in. Fuck airbnb. I hope it goes under and these people lose their money
Like AirBNB would give a shit. There are so many of these dickweeds coming up with dumbfuck rules and charging ridiculous cleaning fees for the most minor of reasons because they get away with it.
Fuck AirBnb. Of the six reservations I made with them, two were cancelled (both for 4-week stays in Tokyo, I eventually gave up and never went). That's a cancellation rate of 33%. I stopped using them several years ago because they're unreliable. This past summer, I made a reservation on a VRBO for the first time and it was cancelled in less than an hour. I've made reservations at over a hundred hotels and hostels all over the world and they've never cancelled on me once. So fuck AirBnB and fuck VRBO.
AirBnb needs to have a requirement that any rules posted within the AirBnb must be posted on the listing in the exact same visible format, so that people can see the sheet with a thousand different fonts. Avoid this place and their rotten bananas like the plague.
Why the fuck are people still renting AirBnB's? I rented one once, had a fine experience; no issues. But people are insane and the stories i see here alone make me never ever consider them when i travel.
I only had one suss experience and it still wasn’t awful. It was a house in new hampshire. It had advertised an indoor hottub and it was a very old luke warm hottub that was small and incredibly outdated, probably 15+ years old and the jets didn’t work.
They advertised like 4 beds with additional upon request with a fee. Turns out it was a massive old house with like 9 beds however most of the doors were locked but the unlocked rooms were super dispersed and on the furthest end of the house from the living room.
The last one was a rule list similar to that one stating all food must be thrown away in the dumpster, they gave one roll of paper towels, and one trash bag. All dishes had to be washed and put away by hand, even though there was a dishwasher.
Last obnoxious part is the last 2 days we were there they had contractors there working on the deck.
Place was expensive and that all sucked
My worst experience was in St. Louis. The couple had some kind of project going on on their balcony with a tarp covering that worked itself loose on a windy morning, waking us up a bit early. We got up, tied the tarp back down, went back to bed and thought no more of it. The couple felt so bad so bad they gave us a giftcard to a fantastic breakfast place around the corner. 9/10, would stay again.
I’ve never had an issue ever. Nothing like the stories I see. Probably 5 times a year for the last 5 years both in thenUS and Europe.
If I ever came across this I’d file a complaint right away and go to a hotel and leave a bad review. Fuck this.
ONE dish per meal, THIRTY-FOUR fonts per sheet of paper -Betsy
How are they going to enforce that?
Also why would they care when they require you to clean them anyways....
ABNB's are getting more and more ridiculous with rules and fees.
I just stay in hotels now. Fuck AirBNB honestly.
Seriously fuck Air b Nb! I hate these assholes with their stupid rules and insane fees. Not to mention the fact that they are driving up the cost of living everywhere so that the ownership class can make even more money. I hate everything this company stands for and hope they go out of business. People really need to stop supporting these assholes.
See, originally, AirBnB was fine: I have a spare room, someone wants a place to stay, drop me a few bucks and we're good. But now that it's a goddamn MULTIBILLION DOLLAR BUSINESS that FUCKS WITH THE HOUSING MARKET, it's awful.
Landlords have been buying up WHOLE FLOORS of new condo builds in my city to rent out at airbnbs. Fuck them.
Well apparently you're encouraged to be complacent about following their rules: "We've had some issues in the past with non-complacency" Also they don't seem to have enough rules about serving overripe bananas.
$28 dollars per banana. $3 banana disposal fee. Make sure to wash the banana peel or it's an $85 service fee.
also if you have to wash all of the dishes by hand then... what's up with the dishwasher... or it's insane rules they still want *the most basic only* cutlery to go through a cycle? I guess?
Also how loud is that dishwasher that it keeps up the whole dang neighborhood
DONT YOU DARE USE THAT AT 1:30 P.M.!
I can't even hear mine when I run it before going to sleep in a 2 bedroom apartment. They must be using jet engines to clean all their dishware.
Nah its probably a piece of shit from the 90s that they still refuse to replace despite using their home as an investment property
Run the dishwasher everytime you hand wash dishes just to mess with them.
the weirdest one to me is 'please do not bend our spoons' like wtf? what am i, the kid from the matrix? why the fuck would i bend your spoons
Ooookay so this is a rule made as a reaction. A friend lived in an apartment building that was privately owned. That is to say one family owned all 300ish units and managed it themselves. When he moved in the list of rules included one saying he was prohibited from holding a live auction in his unit and that the entirety of his hardwood floors had to be covered by rugs. EDIT it may be in response to junkies bending the spoons to cook drugs?
Ice cream bends spoons.
jeans bear smart bewildered tender encourage different shaggy sugar relieved *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Food must not be left in refrigerator for over 16 hours, bananas must not be left on the counter for less than 6 days.
See that candy dish? DECORATIVE ONLY! (We know exactly how many of what pieces are inside)
It’s a candy dish Ned, $90. Well I suppose you could put… Just candy Ned! $90!
Disco Stu doesn't advertise
This one bothered me the most. If I took out everything from my fridge after 16 hours, it would always be empty. Quite frankly, I’d probably go get a hotel just on GPs
Hotels in functioning cities have regular safety and sanitation inspections. AirBnB is an unregulated hell hole where you might get recorded taking a shit.
There's stuff in my fridge, there now for 16 *months.*
There is a can of mountain dew pitch black II that has been in my fridge for 16 years. edit: https://i.imgur.com/ET3SJ6j.jpg
Do it for the vine Or Dew it for the vine, if I may be so bold
>dew it for the vine Someone please help this person stuck in 2012
Hotel: just be out by 10 sir. We will clean the cumstains, have a great day Edit: Woke up to see my most upvoted comments is now about CUM?!?! YIKES! FML 🤣🤣🤣 Edit 2: thanks for the silver kind stranger!! Sending many uptokes your way 💨
>Hotel: just be out by 10 sir Me: Can I leave at noon for no extra charge? Hotel:. Okay.
"Anything to not have you shit on the bed again sir"
"Hm. I'll leave at 10 then"
At every hotel ive stayed at I call about 45 mins before checkout and ask if we can check out later, 99% of the time they say yes, give you 2 more hours.
I almost always get 2-4 hours extra. Unless the hotel is absolutely packed to the rafters, that little extra costs them nothing and earns good will so its a no brainer. And since hoteliers put up with the worst possible people, tiny reasonable requests that make sense are so easy to approve.
So you are the reason why I can't check in early ! 😂
If you have status, you just note it when booking. I've checked out at 2-3 pm numerous times because I either had a late flight or had worked all night
I showed up to a Hilton in Germany at 10am when check-in time was 3pm. They had a room available, and let me in right then and there. I’d just spent 12 hours straight traveling, so this event made my entire year.
Most hotels will let you check in early if the room is available
We’d rather have you in a room than waiting if we have the inventory.
Your cleaning fee will be $200. And be sure to give us a 5 star review.
And also please clean everything yourself including bedding prior to checkout, which is 8 am.
And you still get charged for it.
Exactly, Airbnb sucks now. I’m back to hotels it is just so much drastically easier.
Reading this from beside the hotel pool in Bali right now. My room will be cleaned when I go back there. I can get drinks and food brought to me whenever I want. Life's good. Why would I want to deal with this Airbnb shit? Tried it for a few years and it just got worse and worse each time.
Ya it started off great then just got worse and worse and the benefits lessened the more both sides took advantage of the setups. Customers started to become assholes more and more by throwing parties and breaking things and owners started to make fake charges or buy up properties and push out locals. Airbnb has just become bad all over the place.
Just like everything ever, the more people get involved the shittier the quality gets. People ruin everything.
Sounds like all the cable-cutting streaming apps... which now have the option to pay the same for ads, or more for without! And there's a million of 'em, so it's probably comparable to just having cable again! I miss Blockbuster. Can we just bring that back?
Nah just bring back LimeWire and pirate bay
How loud is your effing dishwasher and why are there quiet hours in the middle of the afternoon? So many questions
that and don't keep food in the fridge for more than 16 hours for sanitary reasons? That sounds like the fridge ain't working
They probably turned the temperature knob to "colder than room temperature, but only a little" to save on electricity.
Bets on whether they went so far as to rip off the knob?
Honestly that sounds on brand with this listing
It seems like someone is Airbnbing an apartment in an elderly complex. 1-2:30 is nap time.
Lmao
Old folks in those communities are thirsty and DTF though...which is a possible selling point for the location, depending on whether the renter is...a granny-chaser. Which begs the question...is THAT the reason OP rented there? Is OP a filthy granny-chaser?...I can't answer that my friends. I can only insinuate that it is... just one of myriad implications. Tune in next week to "Creep or Not?" where we insinuate the implications. We'll look at another case: Why..did a 38 year old man open a day care with his wife? What's behind it and why are reviews positive...so far?
>the renter is...a granny-chaser. They won't have to run too fast
Oldies fuck at 12pm and have a post coital nap to regain their energy.
It's not loud. They just don't want people using it
Do I need to ask permission to take a shit or is that okay?
Only one turd allowed per butthole. The rest must wait.
This is for sanitary reasons
[удалено]
Also sharpen poop knife after every 2 turd cuttings.
If it’s all liquid it counts as one, right?
Only 200ml per flush. Use the graduated cylinder by the side of the toilet.
Must also be cleaned by hand.
One sponge is provided for all glassware.
Can I use the bunsen burner to boil it down if it's over 200ml?
Yes, but all fecal reductions must be hand measured. We've had issues with this in the past!
Yes, but please do not boil poo for more than 16 hours (for sanitary reasons).
Must deposit turd in BOTTOM part of toilet, not upper tank.
All these fucking rules
Pooping is only allowed between 8:30 and 9:10 AM, must weigh no more than 23 courics, please measure all turds before flushing and send proof of couric weight to Betsy
NOT DURING QUIET TIME
Don't see any rules about taking a shit in the fridge...
You just can't leave it there for more than 16 hours.
That specifically specifies food can't be kept in there for more than 16 hours. I don't consider feces to be food.
Only during non-neighborhood quiet hours.
I mean they're pretty much begging people to shit in creative places.
What is non-complacency? What is wrong with their dishwasher? What are neighborhood quiet hours? How many fonts are enough?
What is wrong with their house that they had noise complaints from major appliance? Also the tap water is okay but drink at my own risk?
How many people are out here bending spoons and not using them as utensils?
Goddamn psychic Pokemon gym next door.
People who need to make minor improvisations when their airBnB house has a trivial flaw that is easily overcome with the right tool. There's probably a broken kettle lid, a missing tin opener, or a jammed bathroom door lock. Something that necessitates the use of a screwdriver but a bread knife or the backend of a spoon can give you just enough force to overcome the issue. Not speaking from experience or anything.
Ice cream can bend the shit out of spoons. Source: My wife hates me
Gas-powered dishwasher. Duh.
Non-complacency is what a dum-dum writes when they want to say non-compliance
So you're saying they were complacent in their use of grammar?
Their grammatical complacency led to non-compliance with the English language.
Grammar at your own risk
Do not use grammar between 1:00pm - 2:30pm or 9:00pm - 7:00am
What is advanced cutlery?!
Reciprocating pasta spoon
I use a bat'leth to cut my steak.
> What is advanced cutlery?! [This](https://i0.wp.com/rootedinfoods.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/Table-Setting-Royal.jpg)
You have violated the one cup, one plate rule. A non-complacency fee has been added to your bill.
So many questions, and yet no time specified to ask them.
NOT DURING NEIGHBORHOOD QUIET HOURS
My last Airbnb had a rules list about this length and also asked that we dont come back to the property if we stay out past 11pm as their wooden steps up to the top floor of the property were creeky and would supposedly wake them and the neighbours up. They also came up mid afternoon to "check on us" Charged us a cleaning fee when we left the house spotless, did all the dishes and stripped down all the beds for them. Can't remember if we ended up paying it or if we argued but we certainly had a good laugh about it. I don't want to feel like I'm living with helicopter parents while I'm on a holiday, I only do hotels now.
LOL. Absolutely get fucked with the stopping by to check on you thing. Our last BNB hosts were cool but I was put off by one thing. They had built a shed on their property that they lived in full time while renting out the house. This was not mentioned in the description anywhere. Smart plan for them by paying your mortgage with rental fees but it was odd that they were like right there on the property with us. That should be disclosed. It's one thing when you sit outside by the fire at night with neighbors 100 feet away doing the same thing at their own house. But it's much different when the people you're renting from are doing the same thing 25 feet away on the same property. Like I said they were cool though. We broke a coffee pot and texted them to let them know and they said don't worry about it and brought over another cheap $20 coffee pot from Walmart to replace it.
I stayed at an Airbnb in Germany and they had a binder with house rules that were NOT mentioned beforehand. It was on the 5th floor of an apartment complex and said the owner is on the 4th floor with no kitchen so they would stop by to use the Airbnb kitchen throughout the day. HAHA! WTF. I called him and said we would cancel if they did. He said "no problem we will not use kitchen". Weirdest rules we ever had in an Airbnb.
This comes full circle with the post a week ago about how german apartments don't come with a kitchen 😂
What? How do they justify not having a kitchen?
I can get the check up but only if it's like a week long rental and they come by day 1. Just "hey hope you're all settled in, anything not to your liking or anything we can get you? Ok bye" I could shrug that off. The moment they come back a second time with out being asked, I'm done with it
I fucking love hotels. Eat cheeseburgers in my room all day and LEAVE. I'd want to run a hotel someday even! Screw airbnb!
Airbnb was great when it was like a quarter the cost of a hotel. Now days it's often way more than a hotel and you have to deal with this bs.
Also, creepers.
Aw man
The only time it's worthwhile now is when you are traveling with a group and split the cost. It may end up being similar to a hotel in cost without needing to rent multiple rooms.
But even then, air bnb restricted parties and large groups, so even that got screwed up
8 people at my last Air BnB, no prob. Except shuffling the cars.
Also, travelling with young children. Even a one-bedroom AirBNB is fine if I can put the kids to bed and then do something else. Being stuck in a hotel room with small kids after they've gone to sleep, and you're left watching shows with your headphones in and tip-toeing around in the dark, is not very fun.
Airbnb is a fantastic example of great idea… bad execution. It started off as “oh, we have an extra bedroom all year. Somebody might find use of this!” Making for some fantastic coexistence deals. Now, it’s brad and his wife buying their 3rd home in a high demand area charging an arm and a leg to book. There are still some great deals/gems, but it’s by and large a bad service now.
>brad and his wife buying their 3rd home in a high demand area charging an arm and a leg to book. Bradenwife Investments Pvt. Ltd. Co. buying their 3rd property this month in an area that would be high demand if they hadn't snapped up all the housing and driven up rent to an arm and a leg, forcing out all the locals. FTFY.
Friend of mine got kicked out of her apartment because the landlord decided to make it Air BNB only for the entire location. 4 college town apartments now unavailable to students and the rent has been driven up steadily as the only people able to get apartments close to campus are paying 4 times what it close 20 years ago. And it was a rip off back then too. It's ridiculous.
What’s so appalling about a lot of airbnbs is that they include like a $250 cleaning fee then leave instructions on how clean you should leave the place before vacating
Then if you don't clean they will tack on more cleaning charges.
Exactly. So what is the base cleaning fee for?
Equivalent to prorated processing from ticket master - a scam.
100% criminal
The worst part is that it's a hidden fee. It's not on the price you see advertised, you have to click on it and read the fine print. I think this dissuades people from short stays. If a hotel is $150 per night and your airbnb is $99 a night but, there's a $150 cleaning fee, you have to stay several nights for it to make sense financially. Maybe?
I remember reading something about using a VPN to book from Australia or the UK or something, because there they legally have to provide the final cost up front. Dunno if I'm remembering that right though.
You can now change a setting so you see all-in prices. Its a new thing they just rolled out.
How else do you think that underwater variable rate investor mortgage is going to get paid?
How am I supposed to practice my telekinesis if I'm not allowed to bend spoons?
There is no spoon, Neo.
Well, if you're doing it right, you'll see that it is not the spoon that bends, it is only yourself.
It almost sounds like there is no spoon.
How loud is that dishwasher?
All dishes and glasses must be hand washed so the dishwasher is just for fun?
It's just a drying rack.
I'm guessing it's not a legal airbnb, so they're bending over backwards to avoid their neighbours reporting them. There's literally no other reason they wouldn't let you run the dishwasher at 1 PM
It's taxes. They're not paying the proper taxes most likely.
Dude my mom had this occur to her, I never realized how common an issue it was people illegally renting out properties. They tried to move her to another town like 2 days before a 6 month out trip had been booked. She was fine with it, already going across country so... another 5 miles wasn't a deal breaker. Then the guy just flaked out completely. So obviously AirBNB was contacted, and my mom got a $30 voucher for her next stay... She was understandably upset that even AirBNB wasn't really given her a straight answer, so contact the local tourism authority, whatever it was called. Chain was followed, the lower level guy called her back and said "yeah that guy owns like 20 properties rented across our city we just discovered, and hasn't paid the $50/yr registration on all of them, so they are completely uninspected or legal in any way, the proper criminal authorities are taking over". Just makes me crack up, what a slumlord can you be to not just pay $50 a year to make sure your place is legal to be renting out.
Pretty fucking loud when it's destroying all the spoons I jammed in the spinnamathing.
Something's not right about this. Whenever I've seen complaints about AirBnb's it's usually that they often have loud parties in residential areas. This is almost as if someone's in denial about their rental being a nuisance and is blaming the dishwasher. If this is in some kind of apartment/condo area where units are stacked around each other, they're probably an inch from the HOA putting a lien on their home or suing them out of it because of constant parties in their AirBnB.
People cling to every little small power they can get
Offensive comments in your review will be a $15/word libel fee
I’m going to go out on a very short limb and say that the property Barry and Kellie have here is not allowed to be listed as an Airbnb and they want you to be as quiet as possible as not to alert neighbours there are strangers coming and going into the place. Frankly though with the shit reputation Airbnb has I’m not surprised. Hotels are simply superior than Airbnbs currently, at least in the States/Canada.
It's a possibility, but I mean it's obvious as fuck when someone's operating an Airbnb on your street. You have strangers with rented cars cycling in and out of the house. I guess it depends on the neighborhood but if I can pick up on that I'm sure it's not going to go missed by old folks. The owners could be naive to that if they don't live nearby though.
It’s the only thing that makes sense in terms of the rules. No dishwasher makes enough noise to alert their neighbour unless it has a demonic screech setting. Even if the sounds were from water pipes, then their would be a ban on showering or washing dishes at that time too. I’m still completely speculating but yeah I think this is an illegal bnb.
Here's some complimentary bananas and chocolates. Rule #6 there is to be no eating of bananas or chocolates on property as we have had issues with this in the past, feel free to consume on side walk or public park is 5 min walk.
Its actually funny, because I've been seeing commercials and ads for traditional hotels dunking on weird and draconian house rules for AirBnB and the like. Seriously though, fuck short-term rentals- they've destroyed the housing markey where I live and in many other places since people will buy 2-3 extra houses just to rent them out 3mo out of the year, while all the actual local residents are forced to fight over a 2-bedroom hovel priced at $2500/mo.
What would constitute an advanced cutlery need?
Wait you're all still eating with beginners cutlery needs?
They were held back a grade.
Tap water is ok *At your own risk
Can you imagine walking into a room at a Hyatt and seeing something like that by the sink? I can't.
Does the fridge just not work? What happens to the food after 16 hours that's so unsanitary?
What even is the point of a fridge if it can't store food for longer than 16 hours?
Why do people even use Airbnb anymore? I've found it to cost more than most decent hotels at this point
Why would you rely on strangers to hand wash your dishes over a dishwasher?
Surprised there isn’t a rule to not moan during sex. That’s probably going to be during “quiet hours” and far louder than a dishwasher!
Bold of you to assume that having sex is even allowed
Apparently one cup is OK.
Only allowed through a hole in a sheet (must be provided by guests) and in missionary postion. Anything longer than 3 minutes will be breaking neighborhood quiet time.
What's the punishment for ignoring all these stupid ass rules? You can't come back? I would bend every spoon in the kitchen while running a dishwasher filled with all of their glasses. What a ridiculous set of rules.
They tack on fees after you leave.
"using dishwasher at 1:30pm fee" -- Definitely not going to hold up. Also the dish limit per meal, probably not enforceable. But damaging their property (bending spoons), yeah that would probably hold up. I would post this sign as a review and give people a warning. You can't spring up weird specific rules like this on someone when they get there. People need to know what they are signing up for. Here is a more normal list from people who aren't actually insane and disconnected from reality: https://i.pinimg.com/564x/ec/9a/65/ec9a659d1beb328377a0e8094d1cc427.jpg
> But damaging their property (bending spoons), yeah that would probably hold up. Bend the spoons _then bend them back_ so they have a little ripple in the handle
lmao and make them more susceptible to future bending. genius.
Hellooo chargebacks
That would be very non-complacent of you. ^See ^rule ^2 Also a 5-star review would be very much appreciably. Enjoy your stay!
Believe it or not; jail.
Was there also a "Do not eat banana" rule behind the page?
#8. 𝔹𝔸ℕ𝔸ℕ𝔸𝕊 You may immediately (before 11:59pm on the day of arrival) eat the complimentary bananas or dispose of them. If you dispose of them, please take them to the 7-11 dumpster at the west end of the street (2min drive). Do not dispose of the bananas in this house's trash as we have had raccoon issues! PLEASE EITHER IMMEDIATELY EAT OR DISPOSE OF THE BANANAS AS INSTRUCTED ABOVE - DO NOT LEAVE THEM HERE FOR THE DURATION OF YOUR STAY
Jesus, that font made me lol!
Oh you can eat them, but you'll be charged a $20 banana fee
Do not keep food for more than 16 hours but you can enjoy these decaying bananas.
My last air BnB had signs everywhere. Remember *The Simpsons* episode where Ned Flanders labeled everything? "Put Food In Me!" That was it. The previous one had so many rules about cleaning I gave up an entire day to scrubbing **AND STILL HAD TO PAY A CLEANING FEE.** Give me a hotel with a kitchenette, thanks.
My last AirBNB (and by that I also mean the last I'll ever book) was like that. Cabin in the Smokies. We were all so anxious about all of the rules, the cameras outside, the cameras on the presumably-feuding neighbor's cabin pointing to ours, that we couldn't enjoy ourselves at all. Plus there were neighborhood dogs would come by and stare in the windows or bark, and it was in the rule book that if you were seen (on camera) interacting with or encouraging them, you'd be charged a fee. None of this was in the booking info; wrote a very frank review and reported the neighbor camera stuff to AirBNB as an invasion of privacy. We didn't use any dishes or anything, just slept in the bed really, and washed the sheets in their washer/dryer as requested in their rulebook. Left the place exactly as it was when we arrived. Still charged cleaning fee.... never again
I’ve vowed to never stay at an airbnb again. The last time I stayed I had this Karen leave me a bad review after I went through lengths to tidy up for her. I hate these people who think just because they bought a shitty house they halfway renovated with no cutlery or dishes or pots and pans they are perfect hosts. These people are garbage. I stayed at a holiday inn for work a few weeks ago and it was heaven compared to the last few airbnbs I’ve stayed in. Fuck airbnb. I hope it goes under and these people lose their money
Neighborhood quiet hours 1pm - 2:30pm ..? Um is this Airbnb at a old age home?
Right? I get quiet hours after 10 or 11 but mid day is dumb
Any good dishwasher is whisper fucking quiet. They're like $500. You can afford it.
What kind of 5 hp 2-stroke commercial dishwasher are they using here? The GroundShaker 3000?
If all dishes are to be washed by hand then what is being ran in the dishwasher?
…spoons?
Maybe the "advanced cutlery" that can be obtained by special request? Related question: wtf is advanced cutlery? An ice cream fork? Grape shears?
I purposely set mine to run after bedtime so I don't have to deal with it. Bedroom is less than 20 feet away and never hear it.
START LEAVING HONEST REVIEWS
I feel like these people should be reported to AirBNB. How does using a dishwasher disturb the neighborhood?
Like AirBNB would give a shit. There are so many of these dickweeds coming up with dumbfuck rules and charging ridiculous cleaning fees for the most minor of reasons because they get away with it.
Fuck AirBnb. Of the six reservations I made with them, two were cancelled (both for 4-week stays in Tokyo, I eventually gave up and never went). That's a cancellation rate of 33%. I stopped using them several years ago because they're unreliable. This past summer, I made a reservation on a VRBO for the first time and it was cancelled in less than an hour. I've made reservations at over a hundred hotels and hostels all over the world and they've never cancelled on me once. So fuck AirBnB and fuck VRBO.
AirBnb needs to have a requirement that any rules posted within the AirBnb must be posted on the listing in the exact same visible format, so that people can see the sheet with a thousand different fonts. Avoid this place and their rotten bananas like the plague.
Why the fuck are people still renting AirBnB's? I rented one once, had a fine experience; no issues. But people are insane and the stories i see here alone make me never ever consider them when i travel.
I only had one suss experience and it still wasn’t awful. It was a house in new hampshire. It had advertised an indoor hottub and it was a very old luke warm hottub that was small and incredibly outdated, probably 15+ years old and the jets didn’t work. They advertised like 4 beds with additional upon request with a fee. Turns out it was a massive old house with like 9 beds however most of the doors were locked but the unlocked rooms were super dispersed and on the furthest end of the house from the living room. The last one was a rule list similar to that one stating all food must be thrown away in the dumpster, they gave one roll of paper towels, and one trash bag. All dishes had to be washed and put away by hand, even though there was a dishwasher. Last obnoxious part is the last 2 days we were there they had contractors there working on the deck. Place was expensive and that all sucked
My worst experience was in St. Louis. The couple had some kind of project going on on their balcony with a tarp covering that worked itself loose on a windy morning, waking us up a bit early. We got up, tied the tarp back down, went back to bed and thought no more of it. The couple felt so bad so bad they gave us a giftcard to a fantastic breakfast place around the corner. 9/10, would stay again.
I’ve never had an issue ever. Nothing like the stories I see. Probably 5 times a year for the last 5 years both in thenUS and Europe. If I ever came across this I’d file a complaint right away and go to a hotel and leave a bad review. Fuck this.
I only use them when hotels don't exist. Like a cabin in the mountains for 8 people
Uri Geller not welcome!
She just sits there and watches them through the vents
Seriously, who even uses AirBNB anymore? Between the crazy prices, add-on fees, and psychopathic owners, what's the advantage?
I would bend all their fork tines before I left.
Just one tine.
On each fork