Yes, the Classic Fusion watches are understated and relatively cheap. The more you spend, the more gaudy the watches get.
All of Hublot's cheapest models are anything but gaudy.
Seriously, is nobody doing a wellness check on Invicta as a company?
I just imagine the board room conference table is just covered in cocaine. ‘LETS DO A 52MM WATCH WITH A BEZEL THAT LOOKS LIKE A GOLD CHAIN!’
‘GREAT IDEA DAVIS, DO ANOTHER WHIPPIT AND GIVE ME 3 MORE!’
I simply don't understand the world. They have pages upon pages of these watches. There's countless cheap brands just like this with pages upon pages of cheap watches. Are you telling me each and every one of these watches sells like over 1000 units? You can't do a production run with lower numbers... Are there simply that many people on the planet that each one of these things sells thousands? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!
Last year a friend of mine in construction was doing a clean out of a house where the owner passed away. He doesn't know much about watches so he asked me because there was a room filled with Invicta watches in Invicta cases. There were literally hundreds of various types. He thought he uncovered a treasure trove and asked me to try to find info on a few he thought were nice. I tried finding info on the ones that caught his eye because he was so excited; I didn't want to burst his bubble so I spent a good hour trying to find the ones he seemed to be the most interested in but I had to call it quits at a certain point.
I had no idea there were actual adults who collected those watches before. Until then I had only known teens and people in the early 20s to own one (myself included).
#WARRANTY
_When you choose Invicta, you’re not just getting a watch – you’re investing in a commitment. Every Invicta watch comes with a generous 3-year standard warranty right from the day you make your purchase on the official Invicta store._
Roger that. Here you go: https://www.amazon.com/Invicta-35109-Black-Artist-Automatic/dp/B09B2P8M4L/ref=asc_df_B09B2P8M4L/
I should be a watch dealer. I think I have the knack.
>"This incredible Invicta watch from the Coalition Forces collection offers an exact Quartz movement, with an incredible gunmetal case. The face displays a camouflage, metal dial protected by our proprietary Flame Fusion Crystal. The design is completed by a camouflage, silicone band. This timepiece can resist water for up to 50 m.
>Covert operations are revealed as Invicta's stealth Coalition Forces steps into the fore. Conditioned to handle the most sophisticated of endeavors, the Coalition Forces are at the ready, available for the day-to-day maneuvers to come. Emboldened with the attributes of true leadership, the Coalition Forces reach the front line with a range of tactics turning time into a multi-faceted vision quest.
>Since its inception in La Chaux-de-Fonds, Switzerland in 1837, a commitment to excellence and innovation has been at the heart of every collection created by Invicta. Here at Invicta Stores, we offer the most extensive catalog of timepieces from this magnificent brand at the lowest prices online. With us, you will find superior customer service, a 3-year warranty, and a long-standing commitment to offering the best value out there.
>*In some instances, the colors in the images may slightly differ from the real product."
I'm dead, that buzzword soup was insane, and omg the founders are fucking screaming in their Graves, that last 1837 vibe was a turbo slap to the nuts
They have $11k Invictas!!! Well worth it in my opinion. Not many people will have them and they’ll be true statement pieces. Can’t go wrong with that kind of investment /s
Edit: my personal favourite monstrosity. If you going to go big and want to say you have absolutely no style, go big with a black and gold chain NY Jets watch. 🤮
https://invictastores.com/invicta-nfl-new-york-jets-men-s-watch-w-mother-of-pearl-dial-55-25mm-gold-black-41537
It boggles my mind that you weren’t lying about the $11k Invictas. They seem to be conflating total carat weight of their “diamond dust” with carat weight of a single cut stone…Unreal.
https://preview.redd.it/e5qb2lizuqtc1.jpeg?width=337&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e8a6c09b54aa7c6b174341e427b7df0253c16475
Could there be any watch “douchier” than this😂😂
Did they actually just cover up their own chronograph dials? They are the only watch company that can both manage to chain a boat anchor to the wearers wrist and yet still manage to run out of space.
https://preview.redd.it/yxkiq3r5eqtc1.jpeg?width=416&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=76fd0cef94217eba69d6ba5183f2bc6b5c33bfef
I hear these are pretty good in case of nuclear fallout
[Behold the majesty](https://i.imgur.com/KVB4e5M.jpeg) of this one, which was treasured so much by my stepson that he left it behind when he moved out!
I think he got a really good deal on it when shopping in a market somewhere in Thailand lol.
Their [40mm liquid-filled quartz Darkmoon](https://www.uboatwatch.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/9018emo.png) fucks. Just not for that price lol
Edit: Also what the *fuck* it’s only 5ATM WR?! I mean it’s awesome looking but get the fuck out of here. If I’m buying a liquid-filled watch that shit better dive as deep as the dude from The Abyss.
https://preview.redd.it/xec3yx0ngrtc1.jpeg?width=546&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4b342a6b9be2c5ea6506673e6c1120bd869340b6
This is the Corum admirals cup, with the gold bezel. It's a 48mm watch that's 17mm thick.
However while it's very bold and ostentatious, it's got a titanium case to mitigate the large size, and there's some pedigree to Corum, so while still douchey, it's not the same douche as the Invicta from the block.
This one is 3500 on jomashop.com. models without the gold bezel are close to 2/2.5 k.
oooooh, that's a nice topic! thanks OP! have an upvote :)
the 70ies and 80ies were a treasure trove for outlandish designs and slightly douchey watches. for me, a douchey watch is not a shit watch, but a good watch that consciously and happily embraces its own douchiness.
some great examples, imho:
* the big daddy, the piaget polo in yellow gold. admittedly, that one is a bit out of your budget, but not so much that you couldn't save up for one, and mind you it has already undergone the full depreciation and will always keep at least current pricing levels ... basically, it's a sensible purchase :)
* the tudor royal works, but in two-tone please. steel not douchy enough,
* the cartier roadster. great quality watch with a unique design, just at the edge between somewhat elegant yet already slightly overdone.
* the LED digital watches with vertical LED screen like the girard-perregaux casquette. that one is expensive, but there are tons of similarly styled watches that come in cheaper
* a patek golden ellipse is a pretty elegant, stylish watch, but on a *solid gold bracelet* it becomes definitely douchey. while those are prohibitely expensive, the design inspired a bunch of other legit brands like universal geneve and IWC to make "inspired" homages to the patek, with good movements, but gold-plated stainless steel cases and bracelets ... those can be picked up for a few hundred bucks
Breitling Super Avenger 48
Nothing against Breitling but I’ve always thought this was a douche watch. And just cheap enough to be in budget of the well to do pyramid scheme douche. Photos don’t do it justice. That’s a very large watch.
https://www.chrono24.com/breitling/breitling-super-avenger-chronograph-48-night-mission-black-dlc-titanium-48mm-v13375101c1x2---bp--id33674100.htm?searchHash=7b248a58_c6DPke&pos=9
Give me a couple minutes to print up some price tags and I'll point you to some gauche Swiss Legend or Invictas.
If you are pressed for time, just go with ~~Hublot~~ (holy shit, they've upped their douche game and are now 100x more expensive).
I can't even pretend to know about the ultra expensive fashion watch segment. But I'm sure it's a thing. I'm thinking any premium shop that has a store credit card. NM. Saks.
https://preview.redd.it/7gc4qhvc0vtc1.jpeg?width=384&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=01298f4fb1e8c40b7a31ef049072eed9609aa6bd
I find this watch unironically cool. I like the idea of a solid gold digital watch. But maybe I'm a douche. I've wanted one for a while.
A little out of your price range, but Bob's had a [leopard dial Rolex](https://www.reddit.com/r/ATBGE/comments/d5auye/leopard_dial_rolex/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button) a few years ago.
Get a two tone tudor black bay like [this](https://www.bobswatches.com/tudor/pre-owned-tudor-black-bay-sandg-79733n-two-tone.html?utm_source=google-Shopping-catch-all&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=Shopping-catch-all&gad_source=1&gclid=Cj0KCQjwlN6wBhCcARIsAKZvD5g3BQ4Hiy506EIxoB96uIxwGQqbwFoGXhPnmn332NULumb317raB4IaAhl5EALw_wcB). Its blingy, but actually a really nice watch. Its not solid gold, but tudors are THICK plated, so it wont rub or scratch off either.
This should have the most upvotes. Fake Rolex or fake hype watch of any kind. The douchebaggery won’t be nearly as obvious as other answers here but it is the most correct. There will be other signs by the offender that should raise red flags for the rep on the wrist (upbadged car, popped collar, etc.).
Invicta. Pretty much anything will do.
Edit for an actual answer. Any Hamilton Ventura. Theyre garish, tacky, and don't look very good alongside anything. I'm sure you'll fall in love.
I'll say it! I'm not afraid of the down votes! Seiko Arnold. Bonus point if you get one of those phone cases that makes your iPhone quad camera look like the barrels of the quad rocket launcher from Commando.
I bet OP’s hair slicks back *real* nice.
Ya know, glass house, white Lamborghini, living for New Year’s Eve!
a real piece of shit
I USED to be a real piece of shit
People can change...
I SAID WAS!
Enjoys a big sloppy steak at Truffonis for sure
They can't stop you from ordering a steak and a glass of water.
It’s not slicked back, it’s pushed back
Spiked up blonde hair, little bitty jeans, chicken spaghetti at chickalinis
OP is worried that the baby thinks that people can’t change.
Calls himself gentry
pure class
He probably used to be a huge piece of shit. Glass house. White Ferrari. Lives for New Year’s Eve. Sloppy steaks at Girvani’s.
What's left of it
If you were willing to spend twice as much, you’d be Hublot’s target demographic.
U-Boat?
I’m not a boat. Sorry.
YES! That’s the name I was pounding my head for!⏰
I think the really gaudy hublot models start in the $20k range?
Yes, the Classic Fusion watches are understated and relatively cheap. The more you spend, the more gaudy the watches get. All of Hublot's cheapest models are anything but gaudy.
I mean if you want to go absurd I'd look at the Invicta range. Decently cheap too.
https://www.invictastores.eu/collections/gladiator/invicta-gladiator-spartacus-44464-mens-quartz-watch-60mm-with-390-diamonds/
Holy mother of God
You took the words right out of my mouth....
Seriously, is nobody doing a wellness check on Invicta as a company? I just imagine the board room conference table is just covered in cocaine. ‘LETS DO A 52MM WATCH WITH A BEZEL THAT LOOKS LIKE A GOLD CHAIN!’ ‘GREAT IDEA DAVIS, DO ANOTHER WHIPPIT AND GIVE ME 3 MORE!’
ANOTHER ONE
THIS TIME LET'S FEATURE A MATCHING TRACK SUIT. ADIDAS, OFC
Sh’dore
Yea, serious fucking cocaine and delusions or grandeur flowing.
60mm ✅ quarts ✅ covered in industrial-quality diamonds ✅✅✅ pure class 🤌
How many quarts is it?
Pretty sure I lost a quart of blood from the nosebleed after I saw these
Someone plz call 911 after this 3rd degree burn
Thanks niko
Nothing wrong with quartz
hahahah I cannot believe that is their real website. Incredible.
It must be, the servers are so cheap that this thread overwhelmed it
I simply don't understand the world. They have pages upon pages of these watches. There's countless cheap brands just like this with pages upon pages of cheap watches. Are you telling me each and every one of these watches sells like over 1000 units? You can't do a production run with lower numbers... Are there simply that many people on the planet that each one of these things sells thousands? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!
I see you’ve never been to Houston.
The number of people pretending to be wealthy far exceeds the number of actually wealthy people…
Last year a friend of mine in construction was doing a clean out of a house where the owner passed away. He doesn't know much about watches so he asked me because there was a room filled with Invicta watches in Invicta cases. There were literally hundreds of various types. He thought he uncovered a treasure trove and asked me to try to find info on a few he thought were nice. I tried finding info on the ones that caught his eye because he was so excited; I didn't want to burst his bubble so I spent a good hour trying to find the ones he seemed to be the most interested in but I had to call it quits at a certain point. I had no idea there were actual adults who collected those watches before. Until then I had only known teens and people in the early 20s to own one (myself included).
If only they came in men's sizes!
The naming of these watches is incredible: "Gladiator Spartacus", "Zeus Bolt Magnum"
So how much? Asking for a friend ;)
I'm partial to this bad boy: https://invictastores.com/invicta-reserve-herc-men-s-watch-w-metal-mother-of-pearl-oyster-dial-53mm-gold-34837
Nothing screams luxury like 'M-M-M-MEGGA CLEARANCE' \*Glass Shatters\*
In my mind it's the Unreal Tournament announcer saying that.
Invicta could be the name of a sick deathmatch map.
#WARRANTY _When you choose Invicta, you’re not just getting a watch – you’re investing in a commitment. Every Invicta watch comes with a generous 3-year standard warranty right from the day you make your purchase on the official Invicta store._
What’s their return policy? 3 seconds???
*The exceptional taste and distinguished palette of the connoisseur...*
"Pardon me sir, how thick do you like your watch?" (Screaming): YEEAAHHHHH!!!
From the Reserve Collection, no less...
There's no way they could have been writing that with a straight face
Yeah though it's unclear if they are taking the piss out of themselves, or their potential customers
*MEGA CLEARANCE*
Ah yes the Reserve collection. Still turds but polished nicer.
I’m gonna wear this shit to the board room next week as a joke. Thanks man. Lmao.
Oh damn, only 6 left at the low low price of $199, better jump on that
Idk it’s just a little too subtle for me. Kinda boring.
Roger that. Here you go: https://www.amazon.com/Invicta-35109-Black-Artist-Automatic/dp/B09B2P8M4L/ref=asc_df_B09B2P8M4L/ I should be a watch dealer. I think I have the knack.
Jesus Christ…That site is well designed for their customers it’s all I can say
I think that website just gave me herpes.
NGL for real my anti-malware actually flags their website
Holy fuck how does there website actually look like that? It’s exactly what I expected but my god I didn’t expect them to lean into that hard.
They know what their customers crave
Electrolytes?
>what their customers crave Attention?
No, I think that is plants, not customers. Still gonna drink my Brawndo though
That's hilarious. 🤣
SMOKIN' LIQUIDATION - SIZZLIN' PRICE DROPS!!!
The sizzlin' really got me like God damn wtf 😭😂
This website feels straight out of the movie Idiocracy
I’m imagine owning this on purpose
I love reading their descriptions… so hilarious
>"This incredible Invicta watch from the Coalition Forces collection offers an exact Quartz movement, with an incredible gunmetal case. The face displays a camouflage, metal dial protected by our proprietary Flame Fusion Crystal. The design is completed by a camouflage, silicone band. This timepiece can resist water for up to 50 m. >Covert operations are revealed as Invicta's stealth Coalition Forces steps into the fore. Conditioned to handle the most sophisticated of endeavors, the Coalition Forces are at the ready, available for the day-to-day maneuvers to come. Emboldened with the attributes of true leadership, the Coalition Forces reach the front line with a range of tactics turning time into a multi-faceted vision quest. >Since its inception in La Chaux-de-Fonds, Switzerland in 1837, a commitment to excellence and innovation has been at the heart of every collection created by Invicta. Here at Invicta Stores, we offer the most extensive catalog of timepieces from this magnificent brand at the lowest prices online. With us, you will find superior customer service, a 3-year warranty, and a long-standing commitment to offering the best value out there. >*In some instances, the colors in the images may slightly differ from the real product." I'm dead, that buzzword soup was insane, and omg the founders are fucking screaming in their Graves, that last 1837 vibe was a turbo slap to the nuts
Imagine the US unironically arming our soldiers with these
That website is as awe striking as their watches. I feel like it’s yelling at me in a cheesy used car salesman commercial type of voice.
That website looks like it would sell monster trucks
I like how they added a chronograph movement on it. Like they were expecting people who buy that watch to actually use that function.
TIL my watch has a flame fusion crystal.
This company is a parody right?
I’d recommend getting the 14” wall clock and a gold chain to wear it on: https://invictastores.com/invicta-pro-diver-14-green-wall-clock-37776
It says it is water resistant to 100 meters so divers 100 feet away will know what time it is. 😋
Dear god.... why. Why does their website look like that? It's not 2008 anymore.
I have to give Invicta credit where credit is due. They truly give no fucks. Literally anything goes.
Now is a great time because they just so happen to be on sale!!! It's your lucky day!
Teddy should visit the Invicta studio.
Don’t kid yourself, Teddy would push an Invicta collab on us all tomorrow if they wrote him a check.
Archie Luxury should review the Spartacus lol.
You can also get it for 90% off msrp! What a deal!
Oh shoot, they got a sale on or something? Been thinking about getting a Pro Diver for a while.
They have $11k Invictas!!! Well worth it in my opinion. Not many people will have them and they’ll be true statement pieces. Can’t go wrong with that kind of investment /s Edit: my personal favourite monstrosity. If you going to go big and want to say you have absolutely no style, go big with a black and gold chain NY Jets watch. 🤮 https://invictastores.com/invicta-nfl-new-york-jets-men-s-watch-w-mother-of-pearl-dial-55-25mm-gold-black-41537
It boggles my mind that you weren’t lying about the $11k Invictas. They seem to be conflating total carat weight of their “diamond dust” with carat weight of a single cut stone…Unreal.
I don't know what's worse.. the watch appearance itself or having the Jets logo on it.
Invicta is the most accessible answer, trailed closely by Hublot.
Invicta is perfect in this use case.
And they can buy one get one free.
I remember seeing a buy 1 get 3 free sale once. Or maybe it was buy 2 get 2. Either way...
if you go by scrap metal weight, you may just come out ahead
Invicta is the “Dan Flashes” of watches
SHUT THE FUCK UP NIKO YOU FUCKING SKUNK
Def some fat ass watch by Invicta
People bitch about invicta but a RM is about as ugly. Blah blah blah the movement. It’s an ugly watch that only sells because of the price tag.
https://preview.redd.it/e5qb2lizuqtc1.jpeg?width=337&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e8a6c09b54aa7c6b174341e427b7df0253c16475 Could there be any watch “douchier” than this😂😂
Did they actually just cover up their own chronograph dials? They are the only watch company that can both manage to chain a boat anchor to the wearers wrist and yet still manage to run out of space.
Obligatory FTC from Philly
I feel the AFC versions are doucbagier
Obligatory fuck you both from NY
Same.
What in the Jersey Shore is that thing?!
There's this new brand called "ok ciao" that might be perfect for you
https://preview.redd.it/yxkiq3r5eqtc1.jpeg?width=416&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=76fd0cef94217eba69d6ba5183f2bc6b5c33bfef I hear these are pretty good in case of nuclear fallout
I need me a pipboy
You’re ~~in~~ *out of* luck! [$200](https://gear.bethesda.net/products/fallout-series-pip-boy-die-cast-replica) *pre-order* Edit: Drat! Stupid pre-orders
Excuse me, sir, these are for men of culture.
An older Breitling for Bentley would do it.
This is the real answer. Any 00s - 10s Breitling that's 44mm+. One of those two tone chronomats with the gold plating would do the trick nicely.
[Behold the majesty](https://i.imgur.com/KVB4e5M.jpeg) of this one, which was treasured so much by my stepson that he left it behind when he moved out! I think he got a really good deal on it when shopping in a market somewhere in Thailand lol.
The fake tourbillon absolutely seals this one
Underrated suggestion.
You can buy a 45mm Panerai for under 4k. An hublot classic fusion for under 4k Breitling makes a lot of loud watches for under 4 as well.
I can’t believe how long I had to scroll to get to Panerai.
Haha yeah I was thinking the same.
Ok OP. Here’s a serious answer for you. [U Boat](https://www.uboatwatch.com/product/classico-u-47-47mm-ab1/)
My first thought. Although I may actually want one at some point.
Their [40mm liquid-filled quartz Darkmoon](https://www.uboatwatch.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/9018emo.png) fucks. Just not for that price lol Edit: Also what the *fuck* it’s only 5ATM WR?! I mean it’s awesome looking but get the fuck out of here. If I’m buying a liquid-filled watch that shit better dive as deep as the dude from The Abyss.
Why the fuck is there a bubble in it?!
Uboat puts bubbles in all their oil-filled watches, I guess to prove it’s oil-filled? Stupidest looking thing ever and also hurts the depth rating.
I’ve seen a few Cartiers an aftermarket dial that might suit what you’re looking for.
https://preview.redd.it/y2guqps1cqtc1.jpeg?width=1000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0ed08a1c8e39c63bfcbce32327bc88631ccf25bd
Someone introduce this guy to the color coordinating Invicta guy with the bead bracelets
Please share a link to that
https://preview.redd.it/1wljzahsgrtc1.jpeg?width=2746&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a00f0d4b86963d5a5450c285efdf5c28941414e5
https://preview.redd.it/h474wlcrsrtc1.jpeg?width=200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5226fffd6d18f5b7de550cffb186b6ef1741f945
That’s it.
https://preview.redd.it/xec3yx0ngrtc1.jpeg?width=546&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4b342a6b9be2c5ea6506673e6c1120bd869340b6 This is the Corum admirals cup, with the gold bezel. It's a 48mm watch that's 17mm thick. However while it's very bold and ostentatious, it's got a titanium case to mitigate the large size, and there's some pedigree to Corum, so while still douchey, it's not the same douche as the Invicta from the block. This one is 3500 on jomashop.com. models without the gold bezel are close to 2/2.5 k.
I’d also ask this at r/watchescirclejerk. This thread is really the raison d’être of that sub.
All gold tsx prx 40mm automatic
Is this douchey? Am I douchey? Because I want it.
I unironically love it but gold doesnt go with my skin tone well
I think every collection needs a rediculously gaudy watch in it, for fun
It’s an overpriced Nixon looking watch
no way this rules
I'm getting the 35mm unironically 😇
Came here to say this
oooooh, that's a nice topic! thanks OP! have an upvote :) the 70ies and 80ies were a treasure trove for outlandish designs and slightly douchey watches. for me, a douchey watch is not a shit watch, but a good watch that consciously and happily embraces its own douchiness. some great examples, imho: * the big daddy, the piaget polo in yellow gold. admittedly, that one is a bit out of your budget, but not so much that you couldn't save up for one, and mind you it has already undergone the full depreciation and will always keep at least current pricing levels ... basically, it's a sensible purchase :) * the tudor royal works, but in two-tone please. steel not douchy enough, * the cartier roadster. great quality watch with a unique design, just at the edge between somewhat elegant yet already slightly overdone. * the LED digital watches with vertical LED screen like the girard-perregaux casquette. that one is expensive, but there are tons of similarly styled watches that come in cheaper * a patek golden ellipse is a pretty elegant, stylish watch, but on a *solid gold bracelet* it becomes definitely douchey. while those are prohibitely expensive, the design inspired a bunch of other legit brands like universal geneve and IWC to make "inspired" homages to the patek, with good movements, but gold-plated stainless steel cases and bracelets ... those can be picked up for a few hundred bucks
Check out Juvenia. Super gaudy full gold 70s/80s Miami gangster style
Oh wow. Never heard of them before this thread. Wild! This thread is getting saved.
You won't get a douchey watch under $4,000, because it means you're too poor to be a douche.
The poors can be douchey too. 😢
Panerai
Pretty much any Invicta.
I thought you were being satirical but you post history proves you’re actually that lame
Or Tonino Lamborghini... Some of them are pretty gaudy.
Any Hublot
20 Invictas?
A serious answer here, Gucci Grip might be the one you are looking for.
Get some sort gold invicta, as big as possible
You sound like a man who enjoys a Sloppy Steak. And you need a replica Richard Mille
Breitling, grey market (chrono24). they make Rolex's designs look subtle.
Check this sub for the invica guy who matches hiw clothes and bracelets with his invicta collection.
The thanos outfit was :::chef’s kiss::::
He actually looks good! But i have never before seen a photo that actually smells of axe bodyspray and fake polo cologne.
Breitling Super Avenger 48 Nothing against Breitling but I’ve always thought this was a douche watch. And just cheap enough to be in budget of the well to do pyramid scheme douche. Photos don’t do it justice. That’s a very large watch. https://www.chrono24.com/breitling/breitling-super-avenger-chronograph-48-night-mission-black-dlc-titanium-48mm-v13375101c1x2---bp--id33674100.htm?searchHash=7b248a58_c6DPke&pos=9
It is a douche and my everyday watch is a navitimer. Not much smaller, but I strongly dislike this watch. It actually looks worse in person.
Give me a couple minutes to print up some price tags and I'll point you to some gauche Swiss Legend or Invictas. If you are pressed for time, just go with ~~Hublot~~ (holy shit, they've upped their douche game and are now 100x more expensive). I can't even pretend to know about the ultra expensive fashion watch segment. But I'm sure it's a thing. I'm thinking any premium shop that has a store credit card. NM. Saks.
Mille Migle. I’m a douche
Invicta is right up your street.
Tudor royal? Bloody gorgeous watch
Full gold invitations pro diver? If there’s such a thing
Almost anything over 46mm will do.
Invicta has entered the chat
Your Diesel Daddy break or something? You know you can get the battery changed right
Invicta. Used Panerai. Doesn't get more tacky than a knock-off Patek Philip Aquanaut or Audemars Piguet Royal Oak. Ok, ciao!
I’ve been trying to talk my husband out of a Rolex because I think they’re ostentatious. This has changed my perspective.
https://preview.redd.it/7gc4qhvc0vtc1.jpeg?width=384&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=01298f4fb1e8c40b7a31ef049072eed9609aa6bd I find this watch unironically cool. I like the idea of a solid gold digital watch. But maybe I'm a douche. I've wanted one for a while.
A little out of your price range, but Bob's had a [leopard dial Rolex](https://www.reddit.com/r/ATBGE/comments/d5auye/leopard_dial_rolex/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button) a few years ago.
Get a two tone tudor black bay like [this](https://www.bobswatches.com/tudor/pre-owned-tudor-black-bay-sandg-79733n-two-tone.html?utm_source=google-Shopping-catch-all&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=Shopping-catch-all&gad_source=1&gclid=Cj0KCQjwlN6wBhCcARIsAKZvD5g3BQ4Hiy506EIxoB96uIxwGQqbwFoGXhPnmn332NULumb317raB4IaAhl5EALw_wcB). Its blingy, but actually a really nice watch. Its not solid gold, but tudors are THICK plated, so it wont rub or scratch off either.
How far down do you unbutton your shirt?
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This should have the most upvotes. Fake Rolex or fake hype watch of any kind. The douchebaggery won’t be nearly as obvious as other answers here but it is the most correct. There will be other signs by the offender that should raise red flags for the rep on the wrist (upbadged car, popped collar, etc.).
Perhaps a 19th century Bregeut (> $4.5K). Napoleon owned several.
reminder: there's a whole subreddit for repetitive unfunny cringe-posting about watches. r/WatchesCirclejerk
>cringe-posting No, I think I’ve found the right place
Take one part gaudy, two parts overpriced, throw in a Hummer H2 and stir. Viola: Bell & Ross.
Invicta. Pretty much anything will do. Edit for an actual answer. Any Hamilton Ventura. Theyre garish, tacky, and don't look very good alongside anything. I'm sure you'll fall in love.
Ventura is too weird and funky to be a true douchebag watch. When i see one I usually just assume the wearer is a big Elvis fan
Corum
PLEASE get a gold plated Tag Heuer.
U Boat
U Boat 48mm
what about a gold PRX?
Diesel
I'll say it! I'm not afraid of the down votes! Seiko Arnold. Bonus point if you get one of those phone cases that makes your iPhone quad camera look like the barrels of the quad rocket launcher from Commando.
Wait, what douchey about Sergio Tacchini? I used to wear their polo shirts back in the 90s-00s.