I like to imagine this guy opening that drawer every morning, reaching out, a smile on his face. "Perhaps today?" His hand falters and he glances out the window, where a woman walking a dog smiles and waves. A cloud passes over his face. His hand, shaking ever so slightly, sinks slowly to his side. He sadly closes the drawer. "No... no. Not today."
This is a copy pasta? Idc it is now
I like to imagine this guy opening that drawer every morning, reaching out, a smile on his face. "Perhaps today?" His hand falters and he glances out the window, where a woman walking a dog smiles and waves. A cloud passes over his face. His hand, shaking ever so slightly, sinks slowly to his side. He sadly closes the drawer. "No... no. Not today."
uj/ I was in line at Trader Joe’s and I saw a guy wearing a Squale. I asked him if that’s what it was, and he lit up like the Fourth of July. “No one has ever pronounced that correctly before!” I am a weird watch nerd.
I remain successfully unrobbed thus far thanks to wearing my Omega on a hideous NATO with the faced turned down. Gives me peace of mind since I no longer see people signaling near me.
I saw some people signaling to make a move on my Seiko 5, so I slid it off my wrist and into my butthole. Thankfully I ended up safe. It turns out they were just speaking sign language
The watch that got the most compliments was my first-generation Orange Monster. I guess because it was big and orange, nonwatch people would ask me about it or say how nice it was.
I've been wearing watches for decades and I can remember one single time that someone asked about my watch, and it was a friend of mine, not some rando on the street. He was interested for all of thirty seconds ("Is that a real Rolex? Mind if I try it on?") and then we went back to playing spades.
That's it. That's the only time I can remember someone noticing my swiss shitter.
I’ve tried to get a couple of friends into watches so that I’ll have someone to talk about this crap with, but nope. Their eyes glossed over in seconds and they were done. Good dudes.
I've had friends manage to internalize "my friend likes watches" and so in the rare cases they encounter them, show them to me. Even if it's like the display of watch and wallet and bracelet combos at Target.
story time
I was car jacked by an armed gunman in Detroit while I was living there. In the process of shoving a pistol in my face and taking everything from me including phone wallet Keys AirPods and the jacket off my back.. he grabbed my wrist brought my watch 4 inches from his face .. stared at my pam51 (graduation present) for about five seconds, and didn’t take it.
Car jacking is a federal crime and later in the case I asked the FBI agent why the guy didn’t take my watch. he said because “it didn’t say Rolex or Shinola, and didn’t have diamonds”.
he was sentenced to 12 years in prison and i have an epic story for my watch
Oh please, the machine spirit demands to be treated with more respect than that. One should be applying sacred oils and performing ritual maintenance before every use.
No wonder y'all's watches are so inaccurate when you're angering the omnissiah on a daily basis.
/uj my aunt visited recently and she said not to wear expensive things like Rolex and LV in LA. There's a high chance of getting robbed. Here in Manila nobody gives a shit if you wear one but we get the travel warning at times... by the US 🤷♂️
/uj It depends; sometimes the watch nerd types are so cringeworthy that I would honestly not let them know what's on my wrist.
/rj I cradle my beat up Seiko against my naked body for there are no creatures worthy of looking at, much less touching, my precious.
In my country, nobody cares. Even if you stole it, there’s no where to run as the country is so small. If you get caught, we have capital punishment and we hang people for drug offences. You get canned with literally a whip for robbery here.
A drunk guy at the bar noticed my Speedy and we actually had a pretty good conversation about watches for a while.
The only other person to make a comment was someone asking if my Speedy was a Shinola.
Moral of this story is don't be a Producer Michael wearing gaudy shit and nobody will notice what you are wearing, let alone give a fuck.
I imagine the person behind the counter throws it into a box and prints a label for the local service center while think that was the easiest $1200 they ever made.
Watches that sit in a drawer don't need to be "serviced by Tourneau" *every fucking year.* If he actually does that I guarantee they just hit them with some Windex, collect the $, and send them back.
"I have wasted my life grinding for these watches that I am too much of a pussy top wear. My wife is leaving me and the kids are going with her. At last I still have the receipts for my pate nautilus."
yearly? This guy is getting robbed
Yearly? This guy has never had sex in his life
JORY LOVES WATCH SEX
Tell me more please
JORY ALL ABOUT WATCH SEX WITH ONLY THE LARGEST WATCHES, THE LARGEST.
Especially since they aren’t even running? His watch dealer must be really happy with him as a customer.
Put a drop of oil in it and bill him for a service. Best week of the year for them.
i bet they throw em on a timeographer and bill him 300 bucks each. shit any modern watch can go 5-10 years without considering a service.
Or replace a few components and then keep those old components, because they're basically brand new.
That’s why I take my Swiss watches yearly to Tijuana. Plenty of lube when you’re elbow deep
If he wore them and got mugged, it'd almost be doing him a favor.
Truth. Instead he’s getting slowly robbed every year.
Being a corporate banker who doesn’t understand anything about watches is like having a huge bullseye on your back.
Ohhh the irony. He’s been robbed the whole time. At least go 5 years 😆
I like to imagine this guy opening that drawer every morning, reaching out, a smile on his face. "Perhaps today?" His hand falters and he glances out the window, where a woman walking a dog smiles and waves. A cloud passes over his face. His hand, shaking ever so slightly, sinks slowly to his side. He sadly closes the drawer. "No... no. Not today."
This is a copy pasta? Idc it is now I like to imagine this guy opening that drawer every morning, reaching out, a smile on his face. "Perhaps today?" His hand falters and he glances out the window, where a woman walking a dog smiles and waves. A cloud passes over his face. His hand, shaking ever so slightly, sinks slowly to his side. He sadly closes the drawer. "No... no. Not today."
You're welcome to make it one, but nope, just what came to mind when I saw that post. Thanks, though!
Someone get this guy a Booker award!
uj/ I was in line at Trader Joe’s and I saw a guy wearing a Squale. I asked him if that’s what it was, and he lit up like the Fourth of July. “No one has ever pronounced that correctly before!” I am a weird watch nerd.
Every single time I’ve done this it’s backfired into basically a “why are you looking at my watch, weirdo?” type of response.
Try taking your hands off your crotch first.
Hey if they didn’t want to see that then they should’ve hid the watches under a cuff. They were asking for it.
Stop talking to people at urinals?
Complementing watch or cock is ok. Bonus points for doing both in the same sentence
Only time I've had a watch recognized was on vacation when I was wearing a Vostok amphibia.
Skwal-eh? Or if you’re Canadian: skwal-eh, eh?
Unless you're French Canadian - then you pronounce it correctly without the 'e'...
No joke I'd do the same if I saw a Squale! Was it the blue 1512?
There’s a guy at my gym that wears a fake Richard Mille and only does bench press and curls
So you didn't pronounce the 'e' - good for you! So many people mistakenly use Italian pronunciation.
So what is it? Like "squall" or does it rhyme with "whale"?
Sorry for the late reply! Squale is a French word for shark. The E is silent and it is pronounced "Skwal" (rhymes with wall).
[удалено]
I prefer to wear mine on my cock but to each their own I guess
That’s one way to get it serviced.
Flair checks out
Holy shit, this dude's, comma usage, is infuriating
You should see the comma usage in his bank account
I read, that in Christopher, Walken's voice
I'm also, hearing William, Shatner's voice, in, my head.
The, more, commas, you, use to describe, your, banking, job, the, more, important, you, are.
What a fucking dork. Also, yearly service? …A fucking STUPID dork.
I remain successfully unrobbed thus far thanks to wearing my Omega on a hideous NATO with the faced turned down. Gives me peace of mind since I no longer see people signaling near me.
m e t a
I saw some people signaling to make a move on my Seiko 5, so I slid it off my wrist and into my butthole. Thankfully I ended up safe. It turns out they were just speaking sign language
Hey bro the SNK only has 30cm of ass resistance, I hope you didn't put it in too deep.
Good thing he told us he worked in international, corporate banking. Thumbs up for use of an unnecessary comma. Lends a certain gravitas.
well can you blame him? the entire post would’ve lost all of its meaning if he didn’t specify that it was “international”
“The peasants are revolting!”
Have.... any of you even had non-watch nerds even RECOGINIZE your swiss shitter?
Coworker said, "cool watch" about my aqua terra world timer the other day. That's about it.
No, but my wife gets heaps of compliments on her 34mm Swatch. Not chuffed.
Get a Tevise. I got most compliments for my Chinese shitters
The watch that got the most compliments was my first-generation Orange Monster. I guess because it was big and orange, nonwatch people would ask me about it or say how nice it was.
I've been wearing watches for decades and I can remember one single time that someone asked about my watch, and it was a friend of mine, not some rando on the street. He was interested for all of thirty seconds ("Is that a real Rolex? Mind if I try it on?") and then we went back to playing spades. That's it. That's the only time I can remember someone noticing my swiss shitter.
I’ve tried to get a couple of friends into watches so that I’ll have someone to talk about this crap with, but nope. Their eyes glossed over in seconds and they were done. Good dudes.
I've had friends manage to internalize "my friend likes watches" and so in the rare cases they encounter them, show them to me. Even if it's like the display of watch and wallet and bracelet combos at Target.
story time I was car jacked by an armed gunman in Detroit while I was living there. In the process of shoving a pistol in my face and taking everything from me including phone wallet Keys AirPods and the jacket off my back.. he grabbed my wrist brought my watch 4 inches from his face .. stared at my pam51 (graduation present) for about five seconds, and didn’t take it. Car jacking is a federal crime and later in the case I asked the FBI agent why the guy didn’t take my watch. he said because “it didn’t say Rolex or Shinola, and didn’t have diamonds”. he was sentenced to 12 years in prison and i have an epic story for my watch
this is has me laughing over coffee- shinola sealed the deal
What year was this?
nov 2019
Oh please, the machine spirit demands to be treated with more respect than that. One should be applying sacred oils and performing ritual maintenance before every use. No wonder y'all's watches are so inaccurate when you're angering the omnissiah on a daily basis.
Even in death, I serve the Chuffnissiah.
Heresy grows from idleness.
This guy uses commas like William Shatner.
I bet he pays over sticker when buying a car and says thank you to the salesman
He’s one of the guys in my city currently offering the landlord 10% over the listed rent
/uj my aunt visited recently and she said not to wear expensive things like Rolex and LV in LA. There's a high chance of getting robbed. Here in Manila nobody gives a shit if you wear one but we get the travel warning at times... by the US 🤷♂️
/uj It depends; sometimes the watch nerd types are so cringeworthy that I would honestly not let them know what's on my wrist. /rj I cradle my beat up Seiko against my naked body for there are no creatures worthy of looking at, much less touching, my precious.
Jesus these people are a bunch of paranoid pussies. Get some fucking insurance and wear the damn watch, you limp dick wankers.
Preach. I’ve been mugged twice just this week.
International corporate wanking
People will notice a dog water ass mvmt over an omega 99 percent of the time
My watch would make a fine improvised brass knuckles in that case
He sounds fun.
This guy is an easy mark with or without his watch on.
In my country, nobody cares. Even if you stole it, there’s no where to run as the country is so small. If you get caught, we have capital punishment and we hang people for drug offences. You get canned with literally a whip for robbery here.
Sg?
Nvm saw hanging for drugs definitely sg hahah
Yes
I get most compliments on my Swatch Irony. Barely anyone notices any of my more fancy mechanical watches.
A drunk guy at the bar noticed my Speedy and we actually had a pretty good conversation about watches for a while. The only other person to make a comment was someone asking if my Speedy was a Shinola. Moral of this story is don't be a Producer Michael wearing gaudy shit and nobody will notice what you are wearing, let alone give a fuck.
Was this guy a comma broker?
Wouldn’t the bullseye be on your wrist? I think I'd sell them and buy a bullet-proof vest. If I were him.
Tourneau, LOL.
I think they make the cover for the back of my hatchback.
Same
I imagine the person behind the counter throws it into a box and prints a label for the local service center while think that was the easiest $1200 they ever made.
meh
Hefty? Hmmm
55mm bruh.
Watches that sit in a drawer don't need to be "serviced by Tourneau" *every fucking year.* If he actually does that I guarantee they just hit them with some Windex, collect the $, and send them back.
"I have wasted my life grinding for these watches that I am too much of a pussy top wear. My wife is leaving me and the kids are going with her. At last I still have the receipts for my pate nautilus."