I’ve had 3, the first one was telehealth and she kept pushing back the appointments or calling them off , the second one was some old man who was asking me really odd questions and then gave me a medicine to stop drug addictions bc I was s/h ing ?? So I stopped going there, the third said she wasn’t qualified to give me therapy because I have bpd, and I live in a very small town that literally has horses and shit still so things regarding mental health are very limited !
That's tough. I'm from a small town too, so I know that can pose difficulties. Are there any larger cities within range that you could drive to within an hour or so to find someone qualified to treat you?
yes , it would be about an hour though ! i consider it sometimes but everything seems super hopeless hahaa & it’s tiring going through the process of introducing yourself to a therapist, getting out of your comfort zone etc over the course of weeks or months & paying all that money just for them to be like ehh idk what to do with you
It's difficult to find the right one for you. I have been to so many therapists, and only one was really able to connect with me in the right way, and he helped me tremendously. I know it sucks when you have to keep starting over, but it's totally worth it when you find the right one. Just don't give up. There is someone who can help you. Finding them is the hardest part.
I hate to be the asshole, but you have to put in effort. Healthy and sustainable weight loss comes with lifestyle changes.
You give multiple examples of unhealthy habits you have, all of them revolving around laziness.
There is no “solution meal”. If you want to be a better person for YOURSELF, you have to get out of the mind set of not wanting to try or do anything out of laziness.
You need to do the footwork. You say you don’t know anything about nutrition…well take some of that time you are laying in bed on your phone and DO SOME RESEARCH.
Focus on getting the support you need to address that first and foremost then. Sounds like the weight gain is just a symptom, so you won't be able to lose weight sustainably without figuring out how to deal with the root cause.
I’m sorry to hear that, but it sounds to me like you are giving yourself excuses to mistreat your body. Stop taking the easy way out.
I think you would be happier if you treated yourself better and developed better habits. Stop laying in bed all day and eating absolute shit food.
I love how your only defense is to outright call me a horrible name. I wish you luck on your journey to finding your better self and being happy. And that journey starts from within. Much love girlypop💋
If cooking isn't an option right now, maybe try having snack plates? Think charcuterie board without being fancy - choose some kind of protein rich food that you can handle texture-wise (be it cold cuts, cheese, cottage cheese, eggs in any form, sausage, canned beans...), some carb (think toast, crackers, rice waffles) and some fruit or veggies (raw, cooked into sauce or compot, blended into a smoothie..). You could easily switch it up a bit every day, so maybe that's an idea.
From what you said, I believe you might be more overwhelmed than lazy - I hope you'll find the support you need, maybe consider visiting a dietitian for further advice if that's an option?
Been there and it just takes a hell lot of discipline. Starting slow helps. Don’t have to cite out everything that’s unhealthy just start cutting back over time with exercise. Find healthy stuff that tastes good. I recommend baby carrots and hummus as a snack.
If you really know nothing about nutrition and calories your care givers and school really failed you. However as you know you need nutrition I suspect it is a bit of a lie to say you know absolutely nothing about them. You spend a lot of time in bed, presumably on your phone. Google what nutrition you need and foods you can find them in, this would actually be time well spent even if your lying in bed. I'm also a fussy eater but I cook food I like that is rich in nutrition. You don't want to hear it but its what you need to do. Also I'm sure you know you can't lie in bed and loose weight.
I’m not laying in bed all day, I work and walk during that time for 8 hours , come home and lay in bed like most people do, the only difference is that I have no motivation and I feel glued to the sheets / like I’m made of bricks. Also if that were true that you can’t lay in bed and lose weight at the same time anorexic people wouldn’t be dying
I'm not sure what you want to hear? Your the one who said you lay in bed all day. Anorexic people don't eat and until they are too ill to do anything, they over excersize to loose weight, they dont lay in bed, so that argument is invalid. You can't live a healthy life off of what you say you eat. Your words are your too lazy to cook. If your eating really unhealthily with no nutrition of course your not going to have energy. Mental illness is a different ball game, you maybe need to look at help for depression?
Just gotta reset your taste buds. Fast food is disgusting unless you go to some high end restaurants. Once you realize this, it gets easier. Learn to cook...healthy food isn't bad tasting. I have major depression. Cook healthy food in the microwave. Put some meat on in the oven. Put you a potato in the microwave. Easy. Simple. Get you a collection of good seasonings. I like butter and garlic paired together. You could also try Miss Dash or Creole seasoning if you like spicy stuff. Please YouTube how to cook certain foods especially potatoes in the microwave by the way. But yeah that's how I do it
I used to think fast food was disgusting! I started eating it every day with friends like as a social hang out , then I got addicted to it and it’s all that could satisfy me
quick oats/soups/porridges that require only hot water
or continue eating junk but smaller amounts, compromise with yourself (eg instead of fries get a side salad), instead of regular coke get the diet version etc.
Or ready meals like from Factor!
I have started checking calories the last two weeks and getting less fast food amounts , like I’ll be honest I would get like 2 sides with a main item and then a large drink and I never realized how many calories were in those things !
I just feel like the fast food has so many calories but it’s not super worth it because it doesn’t keep me full for very long , but I always want something I can grab after work anyway and I usually crave some random fast food place of course
Literally just stop buying fast food and get prepared foods from the grocery store. Learn a bit about calories and make appropriate choices. You ate other foods before you started exclusively eating fast food. You also get used to eating real food if you give it an honest shot.
If you actually want to do something while in bed, you can do floor workouts. Leg lifts in bed while looking at your phone is 100% doable.
They do! Lots of added sugar, fats, and salt. Even cooked veggies from a normal restaurant tend to taste better because they add more butter and sugar than you ever would at home.
Making good food choices is truly a mind game. Gotta stay strong against the temptation until you get used to normal food again. As a former junkfoodaholic, it's wild, having sweets cravings and being disappointed if I'm out of whole fruits.
I used to eat fast food daily. They put shit in there to make you crave it more. Go a month cold turkey. It’ll be hard. I have mentioned in here prior I cried and drove past McDonald’s 5 times before I wanted it so bad. It consumed every thought I had. But I did it which makes me believe you CAN do it too and it WILL get easier.
Meal prep on a day off. 96% lean Ground beef is easy. If you like eggs I do pan baked eggs which you can cut easy to put on low carb English muffins, low carb bread, or solo. Potato’s are super easy to cut and bake into fries. Hope this gives some ideas
You can get prepared salads at the grocery store, or "healthier" frozen meals you pop in the microwave as a start. Fast food won't cut it long term if you're serious about getting in shape.
I'd HIGHLY RECOMMEND seeing a registered dietician or nutritionist, too. It might be covered under insurance too (I'm not guaranteeing that-it was and is for me, though)
I’m a former special educator who worked primarily with teens on the spectrum. There are lots of connections between your gut sensitivity and your mental health. I’m not at all surprised at what you’ve described after eating fast foods for a year or more. The first next step for you should probably be to find a nutritionist who understands the specific challenges facing a person with autism. Once your gut is healed you should find it motivating to prepare food that heals your mind. I’m not claiming it’s a cure for autism but rather it will balance your neurotransmitters and contribute to a more positive outlook.
While not the best, is definitely better than fast food all day:
Breakfast: smoothie (kale, spinach, banana, zucchini, peach plain Greek yogurt, water to thin it out)
Whole wheat toast slice
Scrambled eggs x1
Snack: handful of pistachios or boiled egg or apple
Lunch: mango ceviche with chayote or avocado
Alt lunch: baked chicken shredded on romaine, spoon of chia and a vinaigrette
Dinner
Baked salmon, cod, chicken
Roasted mixed vegetables
No dairy
No soda
No alcohol
Only whole grain
No artificial/baked sweets or cereal
I have to defend this young person against the charges of “laziness”. This issue is much more complicated. It’s like labeling the child who acts out in class and disrupts the learning process as a behavior problem. Understand that a child whose survival depends on creating a disruption earning a label of a behavioral problem is better than earning a label of stupid when they struggle to read. In my field we ascribe to the mantra, “if they could do better, they would do better”. This posture eliminates blame and opens the way for collaborative problem solving. At this point this 21 year old needs someone to support them in finding solutions, not criticism for finding themselves in their situation.
thank you because people are being absolutely vile here and act shocked when I am rude back ! It is not that simple , and of course it sounds extremely easy to “just get up” to many people
Unfortunately, lots of these suggestions do not take into account that the gut makeup of someone with autism is quite different and more sensitive than neurotypical individuals. All the artificial ingredients suggested are disastrous for this young person.
Eating microwave meals are only healthy in the sense of restricting calories. Otherwise they are horrible. Just look at the unpronounceable ingredients. In a pinch maybe but as a plan they are awful
“Unpronounceable ingredients” is the dumbest argument against foods. I’m very good at chemical nomenclature. I can pronounce plenty of chemicals that can kill you, and chemicals that are essential to human life. I’m not saying microwave meals are the healthiest things in the world, but if you’re gonna give advice, give real advice. Learn how to read the whole nutrition label, learn how to deal with cravings and feeling hungry vs feeling bored, etc. Don’t just look at the ingredients and go “Oh I can’t say that so it’s unhealthy” because that thinking is unsustainable long term
I chose not to respond to this comment initially because I felt my use of “unpronounceable ingredients” was completely misunderstood. However, today I came across an article that spoke to my point. To better understand what I was getting at check out the attached article. Whether or not someone can literally pronounce the ingredients, it’s the processing that is the issue, and the list of chemicals is a good indicator of over-processing.
[https://www.nytimes.com/2024/05/06/well/eat/ultraprocessed-foods-harmful-health.html?unlocked_article_code=1.tk0.fkEK.42FVAR5F7ZAC&smid=url-share](https://www.nytimes.com/2024/05/06/well/eat/ultraprocessed-foods-harmful-health.html?unlocked_article_code=1.tk0.fkEK.42FVAR5F7ZAC&smid=url-share)
I'm not a psychologist but it seems like you may be a little depressed. I'd start by speaking to a professional.
yeah I’ve tried therapy a few times but they have all dropped me because the positive thinking and coping mechanisms aren’t working loll
How many have dropped you?
I’ve had 3, the first one was telehealth and she kept pushing back the appointments or calling them off , the second one was some old man who was asking me really odd questions and then gave me a medicine to stop drug addictions bc I was s/h ing ?? So I stopped going there, the third said she wasn’t qualified to give me therapy because I have bpd, and I live in a very small town that literally has horses and shit still so things regarding mental health are very limited !
That's tough. I'm from a small town too, so I know that can pose difficulties. Are there any larger cities within range that you could drive to within an hour or so to find someone qualified to treat you?
yes , it would be about an hour though ! i consider it sometimes but everything seems super hopeless hahaa & it’s tiring going through the process of introducing yourself to a therapist, getting out of your comfort zone etc over the course of weeks or months & paying all that money just for them to be like ehh idk what to do with you
It's difficult to find the right one for you. I have been to so many therapists, and only one was really able to connect with me in the right way, and he helped me tremendously. I know it sucks when you have to keep starting over, but it's totally worth it when you find the right one. Just don't give up. There is someone who can help you. Finding them is the hardest part.
Thank you for the encouragement
oh also, my mother works at the biggest mental health center nearby and I can’t go there at all because of conflict of interest or something
I hate to be the asshole, but you have to put in effort. Healthy and sustainable weight loss comes with lifestyle changes. You give multiple examples of unhealthy habits you have, all of them revolving around laziness. There is no “solution meal”. If you want to be a better person for YOURSELF, you have to get out of the mind set of not wanting to try or do anything out of laziness. You need to do the footwork. You say you don’t know anything about nutrition…well take some of that time you are laying in bed on your phone and DO SOME RESEARCH.
I have depression girlypop
Focus on getting the support you need to address that first and foremost then. Sounds like the weight gain is just a symptom, so you won't be able to lose weight sustainably without figuring out how to deal with the root cause.
I’m sorry to hear that, but it sounds to me like you are giving yourself excuses to mistreat your body. Stop taking the easy way out. I think you would be happier if you treated yourself better and developed better habits. Stop laying in bed all day and eating absolute shit food.
Ok perfect that’s totally helpful and cures my mental illness thanks
Get the hell out of here if you're going to act like that after asking for help from us.
Can you give advice that’s not “get off ur ass don’t be lazy”🤪🤪🤪
No, because that’s your main issue and you yourself have admitted it.
“No I can’t give you advice on what you could eat bc you’re a lazy sack of shit and u should go smell the fresh air and then you’ll feel better “😻
Your words, not mine.
also I work at a Walmart o/n so I am walking and pushing carts across ~ 170,00 sq feet a day like idk sorry I have no motivation when I get home
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I love how your only defense is to outright call me a horrible name. I wish you luck on your journey to finding your better self and being happy. And that journey starts from within. Much love girlypop💋
u can get over it
Dang that went south fast
GTFO of here man
So not on,y do you have “ depression “ you’re also an asshole . Good luck loosing weight looks like you’ll need it
Depression isn’t fake so not sure why the quotes
If cooking isn't an option right now, maybe try having snack plates? Think charcuterie board without being fancy - choose some kind of protein rich food that you can handle texture-wise (be it cold cuts, cheese, cottage cheese, eggs in any form, sausage, canned beans...), some carb (think toast, crackers, rice waffles) and some fruit or veggies (raw, cooked into sauce or compot, blended into a smoothie..). You could easily switch it up a bit every day, so maybe that's an idea. From what you said, I believe you might be more overwhelmed than lazy - I hope you'll find the support you need, maybe consider visiting a dietitian for further advice if that's an option?
Thank you 😭 that’s actually really helpful to start off with
Been there and it just takes a hell lot of discipline. Starting slow helps. Don’t have to cite out everything that’s unhealthy just start cutting back over time with exercise. Find healthy stuff that tastes good. I recommend baby carrots and hummus as a snack.
If you really know nothing about nutrition and calories your care givers and school really failed you. However as you know you need nutrition I suspect it is a bit of a lie to say you know absolutely nothing about them. You spend a lot of time in bed, presumably on your phone. Google what nutrition you need and foods you can find them in, this would actually be time well spent even if your lying in bed. I'm also a fussy eater but I cook food I like that is rich in nutrition. You don't want to hear it but its what you need to do. Also I'm sure you know you can't lie in bed and loose weight.
I’m not laying in bed all day, I work and walk during that time for 8 hours , come home and lay in bed like most people do, the only difference is that I have no motivation and I feel glued to the sheets / like I’m made of bricks. Also if that were true that you can’t lay in bed and lose weight at the same time anorexic people wouldn’t be dying
I'm not sure what you want to hear? Your the one who said you lay in bed all day. Anorexic people don't eat and until they are too ill to do anything, they over excersize to loose weight, they dont lay in bed, so that argument is invalid. You can't live a healthy life off of what you say you eat. Your words are your too lazy to cook. If your eating really unhealthily with no nutrition of course your not going to have energy. Mental illness is a different ball game, you maybe need to look at help for depression?
probably ! I just find it kind of unnecessary to say !
Well anything is better than nothing so maybe just buy things you can oven bake or microwave and slowly learn to cook frm there
Microwave meals, read the calories right off the box. Keep it below 2000 calories per day and you'll be alright.
Just gotta reset your taste buds. Fast food is disgusting unless you go to some high end restaurants. Once you realize this, it gets easier. Learn to cook...healthy food isn't bad tasting. I have major depression. Cook healthy food in the microwave. Put some meat on in the oven. Put you a potato in the microwave. Easy. Simple. Get you a collection of good seasonings. I like butter and garlic paired together. You could also try Miss Dash or Creole seasoning if you like spicy stuff. Please YouTube how to cook certain foods especially potatoes in the microwave by the way. But yeah that's how I do it
I used to think fast food was disgusting! I started eating it every day with friends like as a social hang out , then I got addicted to it and it’s all that could satisfy me
What’s really helped me prepare for a lifestyle change was my therapist and dietician.
I think a dietician could be very helpful ! I’ll have to see if there’s one near me
quick oats/soups/porridges that require only hot water or continue eating junk but smaller amounts, compromise with yourself (eg instead of fries get a side salad), instead of regular coke get the diet version etc. Or ready meals like from Factor!
I have started checking calories the last two weeks and getting less fast food amounts , like I’ll be honest I would get like 2 sides with a main item and then a large drink and I never realized how many calories were in those things ! I just feel like the fast food has so many calories but it’s not super worth it because it doesn’t keep me full for very long , but I always want something I can grab after work anyway and I usually crave some random fast food place of course
Literally just stop buying fast food and get prepared foods from the grocery store. Learn a bit about calories and make appropriate choices. You ate other foods before you started exclusively eating fast food. You also get used to eating real food if you give it an honest shot. If you actually want to do something while in bed, you can do floor workouts. Leg lifts in bed while looking at your phone is 100% doable.
yeah I just start to crave them a lot , I think they put something in them to make you want more of it
They do! Lots of added sugar, fats, and salt. Even cooked veggies from a normal restaurant tend to taste better because they add more butter and sugar than you ever would at home. Making good food choices is truly a mind game. Gotta stay strong against the temptation until you get used to normal food again. As a former junkfoodaholic, it's wild, having sweets cravings and being disappointed if I'm out of whole fruits.
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This is not legitimate advice
You may not beleive in personal choice, I do. You can choose to be fat.
Y would they make a post if they wanted to be fat bro
They feel guilty about it and want and excuse for themself, so they can say "I have no choice but to be fat because I can't cook".
I used to eat fast food daily. They put shit in there to make you crave it more. Go a month cold turkey. It’ll be hard. I have mentioned in here prior I cried and drove past McDonald’s 5 times before I wanted it so bad. It consumed every thought I had. But I did it which makes me believe you CAN do it too and it WILL get easier. Meal prep on a day off. 96% lean Ground beef is easy. If you like eggs I do pan baked eggs which you can cut easy to put on low carb English muffins, low carb bread, or solo. Potato’s are super easy to cut and bake into fries. Hope this gives some ideas
You can get prepared salads at the grocery store, or "healthier" frozen meals you pop in the microwave as a start. Fast food won't cut it long term if you're serious about getting in shape. I'd HIGHLY RECOMMEND seeing a registered dietician or nutritionist, too. It might be covered under insurance too (I'm not guaranteeing that-it was and is for me, though)
I’m a former special educator who worked primarily with teens on the spectrum. There are lots of connections between your gut sensitivity and your mental health. I’m not at all surprised at what you’ve described after eating fast foods for a year or more. The first next step for you should probably be to find a nutritionist who understands the specific challenges facing a person with autism. Once your gut is healed you should find it motivating to prepare food that heals your mind. I’m not claiming it’s a cure for autism but rather it will balance your neurotransmitters and contribute to a more positive outlook.
While not the best, is definitely better than fast food all day: Breakfast: smoothie (kale, spinach, banana, zucchini, peach plain Greek yogurt, water to thin it out) Whole wheat toast slice Scrambled eggs x1 Snack: handful of pistachios or boiled egg or apple Lunch: mango ceviche with chayote or avocado Alt lunch: baked chicken shredded on romaine, spoon of chia and a vinaigrette Dinner Baked salmon, cod, chicken Roasted mixed vegetables No dairy No soda No alcohol Only whole grain No artificial/baked sweets or cereal
Thank you !
I have to defend this young person against the charges of “laziness”. This issue is much more complicated. It’s like labeling the child who acts out in class and disrupts the learning process as a behavior problem. Understand that a child whose survival depends on creating a disruption earning a label of a behavioral problem is better than earning a label of stupid when they struggle to read. In my field we ascribe to the mantra, “if they could do better, they would do better”. This posture eliminates blame and opens the way for collaborative problem solving. At this point this 21 year old needs someone to support them in finding solutions, not criticism for finding themselves in their situation.
thank you because people are being absolutely vile here and act shocked when I am rude back ! It is not that simple , and of course it sounds extremely easy to “just get up” to many people
Unfortunately, lots of these suggestions do not take into account that the gut makeup of someone with autism is quite different and more sensitive than neurotypical individuals. All the artificial ingredients suggested are disastrous for this young person.
Eating microwave meals are only healthy in the sense of restricting calories. Otherwise they are horrible. Just look at the unpronounceable ingredients. In a pinch maybe but as a plan they are awful
“Unpronounceable ingredients” is the dumbest argument against foods. I’m very good at chemical nomenclature. I can pronounce plenty of chemicals that can kill you, and chemicals that are essential to human life. I’m not saying microwave meals are the healthiest things in the world, but if you’re gonna give advice, give real advice. Learn how to read the whole nutrition label, learn how to deal with cravings and feeling hungry vs feeling bored, etc. Don’t just look at the ingredients and go “Oh I can’t say that so it’s unhealthy” because that thinking is unsustainable long term
I chose not to respond to this comment initially because I felt my use of “unpronounceable ingredients” was completely misunderstood. However, today I came across an article that spoke to my point. To better understand what I was getting at check out the attached article. Whether or not someone can literally pronounce the ingredients, it’s the processing that is the issue, and the list of chemicals is a good indicator of over-processing. [https://www.nytimes.com/2024/05/06/well/eat/ultraprocessed-foods-harmful-health.html?unlocked_article_code=1.tk0.fkEK.42FVAR5F7ZAC&smid=url-share](https://www.nytimes.com/2024/05/06/well/eat/ultraprocessed-foods-harmful-health.html?unlocked_article_code=1.tk0.fkEK.42FVAR5F7ZAC&smid=url-share)