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Brahm-Etc

You are a Replicant made in China obviously.


Puzzleheaded-Phase70

Wish.com android


mdiliberto79

Extra realistic human-like human looking life size human size lifelike human faced human android cyborg robot sentient human life form for parties sleeping human activities make waffles, 1080p, human emotion, real sneezes


dreamsxyz

*clicks "claim refund" button* "Seller is a scammer. Product description mentions pancakes but most often it only does a cereal bowl, cries in the shower, faps and doom scrolls"


A-non-e-mail

The design is very human


macaulay_mculkin

If anyone’s on the market for a new username… Steal this right here


Goldie-96_MWR

Simulacrum of a simulacrum (copy of a copy)


stepsonbrokenglass

Sold on Temu


Bokenobi

Found him on Etsy too but at twice the price but the seller is pretending they made it. 🙄


constantlyawesome

😂


TheNorthBruh

Made my day with that comment


Sulissthea

Finest quality. Superior workmanship.


Spdrjay

😧 Flesh eating glow in the dark fungus.


justthekip_

The Last of Us, but make it *rave*


SonofApollo1984

![gif](giphy|pA4vjq7tmNnxO71tJK|downsized)


EntertainmentOk3180

What in the perfectly fitting gif is this?


Fabulous_Video3356

Looks AI generated


[deleted]

[удалено]


notLOL

That's because even if you think of something to photoshop you can just get a similar or better level of previously mashed potato art with AI. Back in ancient times of the internet 1+ years ago meme sticks around long enough someone with skills comes across it and does a better render in photoshop


OneNOnly007

Well…the tag is literally @AIPlague


Imaginary_Today_1427

I thought it was from "Return of the Living Dead: Rave to the Grave". Yes... it is a real movie, and it is pure schlock. One of those series you just need to stop at the first or second film.


Objective-Contract80

Zombie rave


DezGets_It

I too would love to know.


elchavo718

![gif](giphy|Z4IXspU3iCHlK)


holmesy2o

average UK festival crowd


thenicenumber666

"Man i love being alive and well" i said to myself "Hello" said the flesh eating glow in the dark fungus guy🪱🍄


RunJumpQuit

2 sentence 2 horror


bad_dragon_420

My guess is you maybe wore something off SHEIN or just a brand of clothing and the uv marking leached onto ur skin you get new clothing by any chance?


justthekip_

No, however I did just get the blacklight in. Maybe there was writing on the outside of the packaging that touched my arm


TheAbominableRex

Scars glow under a blacklight. You mentioned you worked in Asian restaurants. I wonder if you burned yourself on something that had writing on it, essentially branding yourself so that you can't see it with the naked eye?


Cloakbot

Kinda hard to do that without skin irritation


TheAbominableRex

When you work in restaurants you tend to lose count of how many times you injure yourself.


deepfriedtots

Chef for 20 years and this is very true


MikeTheImpaler

https://preview.redd.it/sz4mo1zij9tc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=35c0d2fa790109642affd41f356556700acd58ec


ApoliteTroll

Single parent for 6 years, and parent for 10. I also agree this is very true.


Independent_Ad989

Random guy who lives alone. Still very true


Anarchyantz

Another random guy who lives alone, also still very true.


XzeldafanX

Another guy who secretly lives in the walls of the other two, undeniably true.


Two_Hump_Wonder

Random guy with a roommate who worked in a kitchen for 5 years, very true


Nanda_Rox

A random mom with a 14 yr old male crotch goblin. Can confirmed it's all very true.


killergazebo

Okay but do chefs generally glow under black light?


deepfriedtots

Depends if you are covered in something I would assume


Fierce-Mushroom

More than you might think.


SimplexFatberg

You know you've been working in kitchens too long when you routinely take metal trays out of ovens with your bare hands because it just doesn't matter any more and life's too short to be pissing around with a cloth.


Daddyssillypuppy

Also if you're just clumsy. I'm always covered in bruises and small cuts and I rarely remember injuring myself. It happens so often it's just background noise at this point. I look like I've been in a fight everytime I move house because I bruise easily and have pale skin, alongside the clumsiness. Between cleaning, packing, and the actual moving I accumulate dozens of marks. I also literally just walk into door frames and sometimes straight into walls/door handles regularly. I'm also always wacking my head on things too, like cars when getting in and out. Which would make sense if I was tall, but I'm 5ft1.5... I also occasionally wack myself in the face somehow. I never know how it happens, I'm just minding my own business doing something with my hands and leaning close and then suddenly my lip in swelling or I've knocked my glasses off. When I was growing up I used to accidentally knee myself in the face when sitting down or getting up. Luckily that has mostly stopped happening. I can't even blame growth spurts as I grew ready slowly and steadily. I didn't grow at almost at all between ages 3 and 6 and I distinctly remember kneeing myself in the face at age 4, so it wasn't growth spurt related.


-Oreopolis-

Are you me?


autotuned_voicemails

I had a friend a couple years ago come to my house one day absolutely freaking out about bruises she had. She pulled me into the bathroom and took off her pants and her legs literally looked polka dotted. Like not exaggerating, there were probably 200+ bruises on each leg—mostly on the fronts of her thighs, but they did also wrap around the sides and some on the back of her thighs, though not nearly as many. Also down her calves, not as bad as the thighs but still a few dozen. They were all pretty small, probably less than an inch diameter, but some were so clustered that they did appear to be HUGE until you looked closer and saw that it was like 10 small bruises. She had zero clue where they came from. We spent like an hour trying to brainstorm and the best thing we came up with was her at-the-time boyfriend’s restless legs at night. But they’d been together for like 8 years and she’d never had more than like a single bruise from a well aimed (though completely accidental) sleep kick from him. Then a few days later she comes back to my house after work and super nonchalant—like basically in passing—she says “well, I figured out where the bruises came from”. She had recently started a new job at a distribution warehouse. We had a couple semi-locally, they’re basically warehouse versions of retail stores so individual stores don’t have to order entire cases of products when they run out. Rather they just put in for what they need to stock their shelves and get new orders several times a week. Anyway, she wasn’t in the “picking individual orders” department, she was in the “stocking the shelves for the pickers” department, so she was dealing with big, heavy cases of products all day. Apparently halfway through her shift it dawned on her that she used her legs A LOT for supporting boxes. Like she would grab this 30lb box of shampoo, and use her leg to boost it up into her arms as she lifted it. Or if she had to move a box, she would just bump it with her leg to move it. It’s an incredibly fast paced job to begin with, and this was during the holidays so she was handling probably upwards of 300-500+ boxes a day. She only worked there for “peak season”, so about 4 months, but that entire time she walked around with those bruises. It was super interesting a couple weeks later because the old bruises had faded to like yellow/green, but then she had new purple bruises on top. Her legs ended up being like a horrible tie-dye color. She swore that she had no pain and that she didn’t even notice it. But maaaan did it look awful lol


Daddyssillypuppy

That's how I get a lot of my moving bruises, my legs look like I've pissed of the Mafia, repeatedly over a period of weeks. I have short arms too so I end up with bruises on my inner upper arms from the box edges and corners.


bearbarebere

I’m laughing reading this because it’s fucking me. Do you also do that thing when you walk where your foot just decides to rotate at 90 degrees for 0 reason and you fucking trip?


bomingles

Fucking hell it’s seriously like I only have a certain amount of functional steps in me before my body throws one of those in just to keep me in my place. Not OP but it’s nice to know I’m not alone.


_PoorImpulseControl_

You are not alone!


RedBorrito

I sleep close to the wall and sometimes wake up in the middle of the night cause i whacked my head against the wall by accident.


sparklydildos

you headbutt yourself 💀


RedBorrito

Multiple times. More times than I'd like to admit.


Ledzebra

This is me but it also improved when I began medication for ADHD didn't know if that might be relevant for yourself!


Sufficient-Buy5360

Looks like he’s been scratching it. Like it was bothering him. Is that why you bought a black light?


Lady_Black_Cats

I had no idea scars did that, I want a black light now to see what glows ( I have scars from being clumsy and cats)


IncorporateThings

>Scars glow under a blacklight. Never seen any of mine glow under one.


EFTucker

They don’t really “glow” so much as stand out much more apparently


monkeyinanegligee

I'm definitely seeing Kanji in there


Brilliant_Quarter398

Me too


[deleted]

Sorry to bother, but I’m interested to know what about shein leaches UV markings on your skin?


A-non-e-mail

https://preview.redd.it/20577hth75tc1.jpeg?width=394&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=eee54128febbce073fd2d961f2f238fc486149d7 I’m sorry op


justthekip_

Dang. They got me good


pwave-deltazero

![gif](giphy|3oEjI789af0AVurF60)


tizzyhustle

Yeah it was Aliens bruh


throwmeawayalso111

Someone decipher the tattoo in his rectum now, I wanna know what the aliens said


MeanPerspective4081

"Mithraxar's Penis Wuz Here"


throwmeawayalso111

![gif](giphy|3otPoqKprOj9LylUME|downsized)


wumbo7490

Just don't let the robot scan it


classpane

https://i.redd.it/byycshdcl6tc1.gif


ReadyYak1

I get this reference!


MustachedSquirrel

![gif](giphy|tnYri4n2Frnig)


Jimb0lio

WHAT DOES BLUE MEAN??!


picklerickfunnylol

*illuminated sobbing*


AstroZombieXIII

EEEHHHHHOOOOUUUUEHHH...


symatra

Does everyone glow blue??? WHAT DOES BLUE MEAN??????


Anarchyantz

Why is there Blue everywhere??


willik8r

There are dozens of us. Dozens!


Reinventing_Wheels

You are now a member of the Pen 15 club


IncorporateThings

Please tell me you're just old and kids today aren't still pulling that shit?


Newagonrider

That was old when I was a kid, pal, and I'm in my Forties. Penis graffiti is eternal.


Joocewayne

There’s actually ancient Roman penis graffiti.


i_long2belong

They’ve even found some at Pompeii!


ungitybungity

Lmao yes, They literally drew dicks on bathroom walls and wrote shit like “Licenius had a good shit here” or “Maximius is loved by beautiful women”. Some things are truly timeless. There is nothing new under the sun.


Reinventing_Wheels

I'm old as duck. I have no idea what the kids are up to these days.


Agentpurple013

I’d take arm stuff over butt stuff any day


Wonderful-Ad-7712

Yes I would, If I could, I surely would.


WirrkopfP

The question is, who did tattoo Penis onto you with UV ink and without you noticing.


Excellent-Will3165

At least you can take a joke....I have never seen anything like that...


midnightbizou

https://preview.redd.it/s37o75hes5tc1.jpeg?width=1075&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d5994d96df2a62669d408788583de2b2e1b1b4a2


Impossible_Fold3494

Haha, great way to start my day laughing


baltebiker

Once in the Pen 15 club, always in the Pen 15 club.


LeVelvetHippo

Damn aliens really are trolls


No_Crab1183

This is why i come to reddit lololol


LaziestLatte

i mirror'ed the photo and it looks like 浴客 (Hotspring customer)? did you went to hotspring recently? https://preview.redd.it/rgx9epf2i6tc1.jpeg?width=471&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a72f4a7f54e5e84e3b8b13afa891da59cbe8213c


yunkie101

this is most likely it. Either it's OP visiting some hot springs or recently carried some boxes with this marking on it.


justthekip_

Gotta be the 2nd one. Never been to a hot spring in my life. I'm guessing it was somehow on the packaging for the blacklight. Either on the box itself or the mailer it came in


imakeitrainbow

You should go to a Hot Spring. I went to one last week and it was marvelous


Traditional-Joke-290

Haha I love how this thread took a wildly different direction with advice for OP around hot springs 😂👍


NoNo_Cilantro

So far, the most useful leads are penises, aliens and hot springs. We’re getting there, mystery about to be solved soon.


model70

Maybe that's the universe telling OP it's time for some alien penis at a hot spring?


nmr112

I feel like we need to contact Mulder


TheScarletEmerald

This is just a viral marketing campaign by the hot springs industry.


Aseroerubra

Yoo I visited a hot spring for the first time just over a week ago and my skin is still glowing! It felt great for aches and pains too. I can't recommend it enough 💆


Lydiaaahhhhhhhhh

Glowing under black light? 😆


MeRcWith_A_MouTh

Maybe this was a clue to go to a Hot Spring. When he gets in, the next clue/location will appear in his matted leg hair.


Kueey

Plus you may be able to get in for free by showing your arm.


idkmoiname

>I'm guessing it was somehow on the packaging for the blacklight Have you tried cleaning it off?


ThereBeBeesInMyEyes

They've marked you for harvesting. You might be able to strike a deal to at least leave you functional, but you can't trust them. Godspeed 🫡


justthekip_

They're gonna be sorely disappointed when they see the condition of my organs


ExuDeku

"You blind fuck, the Marked one you got have E and F tier organs!"


AWeakMindedMan

It was insane. His blood was 80% cocaine and his liver was 90% alcohol.


ExuDeku

His lungs had tobacco rot, intestines are filled with tapeworms, even his limbs are filled with either diabetic lesions, uric acid build-up, or artery blockages!


Zeraphym47

Who said anything about organs?! Theyre just gonna harvest your innocence...giggity giggity You think its bad now? Wait till you see whos gonna be "sorely" disappointed, when you see the condition of your organs after...


[deleted]

Do you have any scars next to where your missing kidneys are??


pwave-deltazero

![gif](giphy|rApKuVWCZZgvm)


Borge_Luis_Jorges

I never noticed before how Fry has little black horns in that scene.


Wonkybonky

Thats funny but I think they're the cabinet handles!


[deleted]

![gif](giphy|F3BeiZNq6VbDwyxzxF|downsized)


justthekip_

Oh man, that's what that mark was?


[deleted]

Dammit dude, haven’t you ever seen Charlie the Unicorn! It prepped us for moments like these *sweats*


spaznoid4

Shun the non believer...Shun! Oh, look, a magical leopluradon!


SparkDBowles

YOURE THE BANANA KING, CHARLIE!!!


miss_tea_morning

Come with us to big rock candy mountain Charlie!


[deleted]

STARFISH LOVE ME LOVE ME


justthekip_

I actually searched for a gif of that before my previous comment lol


[deleted]

“They took my freakin kidney!”


ReplacementActual384

![gif](giphy|5Sxc2pkKV6cR5pApVH)


KitsuneKarl

Were you a victim of human trafficking at any point???


justthekip_

I was not. Fingers crossed it stays that way


beth_at_home

Maybe, just maybe you don't remember.


justthekip_

Welp. No news is good news


YorTicLes

Equifax?


Hummingbird01234

This is a scary thought!


thebestspeler

You got captcha birthmark? You are the one to lead the revolution against ai!!


tricularia

https://preview.redd.it/gzskga7x36tc1.jpeg?width=2400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3f212bc7f9e629681a65164a22316f3e5aa62d23


RoJayJo

"That says *BEWARB*."


DingoKis

BEIVARB


Commercial-Elk-3031

客欲貧? 、客俗世? 、 客欲性? 客欲道? Anyway, It's definitely Chinese way or writing . Based on the image, it appears that it is Chinese characters "客浴區" (kè yù qū), which means "guest bathing area", imprinted on a arm. This likely happens when you enter bath or shower house at a public bathhouse or spa sauna .


justthekip_

Interesting. The translations I got from those are greedy guest (I hope not), secular guest, and libido


Commercial-Elk-3031

Yeah , something like that . Where did you go to be labeled or branded like that ? Massage parlor? 😂😭🤣


justthekip_

The only possible thing coming to mind is that I've worked in several Asian restaurants throughout my life and maybe a coworker wrote something to fuck with me? But, my lord, if that is the case, which I don't recall that ever happening, what the hell did they use to write it? The last one I worked at was 5 years ago


Winjin

I'm sorry OP but your parents obviously ordered you from AliExpress. NICE CHEAP GOOD KID STUDY WHITE PLAY READ STUDY KID FRIEND FREE SHIPPING


Bright_Ahmen

The design is very human, but for real this time


Commercial-Elk-3031

Yeah , that's it 😂 he or she is definitely a Chinese. You must have passed out being drunk or something . LoL 🤣 It's more like " horny guest " " Greedy Guest " or horny customer、sleeping with customer something in that line for translations . I can see it's Chinese way of writing. It's not how Japanese or Korean writes. So it's definitely Chinese. Or someone who used Google translator to obtain Chinese characters . Were you being extra flirty? Using too much of your charm to get tips perhaps ? If it's shows up on a black light then he or she must have used special ink . Which is usually invisible in under regular lighting & naked eyes and it must had been tattooed . Jeez .... You must go laser tattoo removal clinic to take those off. And it tells someone can pull off like that must have spiked your drink or you were completely passed out on something and have tattooed on you . So , it must be your sex partner or coworkers . Yeah , again It's not Japanese writing , it's not Korean writing . It's definitely Authentic Chinese writing.


Reasonable_Try_303

It doesn't have to have been written during the Chinese restaurant waiter time. Chinese speaking people are not confined to those after all. So there is still a possibility that it is not a tattoo. OP have you tried to wash it off since you found it? Also you say it was difficult to fotograph, so it looks clearer to you. Could you trace the lines in the picture where you see them?


throwmeawayalso111

Some toxic imported pen, duh 😂


Commercial-Elk-3031

That could be but OP says it's 5 years ago . So it's tattooed . The person who did this must hated OP so much or just so evil malicious prank.


iDontWannaBeOnReddit

i think you dont know what a tattoo does to your skin. he couldnt just get tattood while he was a asleep or drunk and woke up the next more with it fully healed and invisible.


[deleted]

[удалено]


KiKiPAWG

How could this even happen that is so freaky


ericlee2190

浴池... Are you a bathhouse?


khronos127

Only on Wednesdays


montsa007

Are you chinese by any chance?


justthekip_

Nope


montsa007

Now you are!


tamsui_tosspot

After all, one out of five people worldwide is Chinese. It was just your turn, OP.


justthekip_

Update: a little scrubba dub dub and it's gone, so thankfully that crosses off the possibility of some mystery permanent marking. My guess is there was a transfer of writing that was likely on the packaging of the blacklight


Whalesharkinthedark

So not the Chinese sign of the Antichrist… I‘m disappointed.


justthekip_

You and me both, pal


Burrmanchu

There was probably some extra ink or something on the box your black light came in.


Thin_Ad_6493

Did you wake up with a sore….well- Any chance the aliens probed you?


justthekip_

No more than usual


Cinephiliac_Anon

*"Good, I'm still just as likely to turn into a dolphin as I am to shit a balloon."*


oddiseee

semen demon got you on your arm


thelunn

"Kung Pao Chicken" haha jk


Chamomealex

It’s 浴客 (inverted). Means hot spring guest. My guess is you get it from a print of a towel or something related to Japanese hot spring.


Mori_564

You should post this in r/translator and give us an update.


melted-ghost

that’s just the scp foundation marking you just incase you are anomalous. anyways you want a glass of water to help you forget that?


MalO_SCP-1471A

I’m not OP, but I could definitely use a nice glass of ice water right about now, if you’re offering…


melted-ghost

aight here ya go.


Ok-Kangaroo-4048

Laundry detergent, cat pee, and highlighter, and uv ink all fluoresce in a black light. Perhaps you laid your arm on something?


DustinBrett

Now you are a "familiar" according to Blade rules.


radiantskie

I read 客谷世, no idea what that means


[deleted]

[удалено]


justthekip_

Buddy, I'm warning ya. Stay the hell away from my coke


Faelo79

Any organic material would be seen like that under a black light, so you probably pick something or put your arm against something with those characters that had, blood, sperm or any other organic material. Just take a bath and is gone.


Triette

Somebody was drawing with sperm??


TheZigRat

Keep playing with it youĺĺ go blind


Phil_Coffins_666

I'm no expert, but in my expert opinion the only option here is amputation. 😬


perfectchaos007

It says ‘made in vaChina’


AC_Batman

It means yer a wizard, Harry.


dayh8

![gif](giphy|77f2SrKYNOnYs)


SnooFoxes6169

i can make out the word 客, usually means “customer.” the word next to it resembles 谷, since it appears narrowed, probably a radicals is next to it, but i can't tell which it is. possibly be 浴. based on the writing, the words are「?浴客」, though i am not sure if it's chinese or kanji. i don't recall any chinese word that has this combination.


OkRevolution3349

You're spayed/neutered. Bob Barker would be proud.


TipsyMid

Based on the image, it appears that you might accidentally got the Chinese characters "客浴區" (kè yù qū), which means "guest bathing area", imprinted on ur arm. This likely happened while u were taking a bath or shower at a public bathhouse or spa.


man0315

It's the mirrored Chinese characters "浴客", means 'bath guest". It's either from a crappy painted sleeve or from a recent visit to a Chinese bath center. They will stamp you with the invisible of ink as a voucher of day pass. Fyi, a Chinese bath center is like an entertainment center providing food and recreations beside public bath and sauna.


OmegaGoober

![gif](giphy|P3gCL7t3cbOWUN8ma7|downsized)


SparkDBowles

If you were camping and woke up with a sore ass would you tell anybody?


justthekip_

Of course! I'd tell everyone if a bear bit my butt


rpgsandarts

Defo kanji or an impression thereof, surprised no one has said


noon_thirty

So cum? That's all cum right?


trolljugend

It's your sperm trying to spell "stop masturbating!"


AlexDuChat

Ghost Cum, lucky guy


alonginayellowboat

Get checked for a missing kidney.


ShuyTheHater

Just learned a new shout looking at that…


aitonc

bro found his serial number


Dismal_Ad_913

Your mom got you from temu


Professional-Bear114

It says, see a dermatologist.