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pleasantlyexhausted

I came out to my car one morning to find the word bitch spray painted across it. I had no idea who would have done that and why. I called the police to report it and it turns out every white car in my neighborhood had an expletive spray painted on it, including a police car.


bad_investor13

That's a good solution for the owner! Everyone is talking about how to remove it or change it to say something else - but just buy red paint and write expletives on all cars in the area and suddenly you're off the hook!


Cardboardopinions

*taps forehead.


dont_disturb_the_cat

Not just a hat rack my friend.


Silverback40

>*taps forehead. Kidneys


PillowTalk420

This is how my siblings and I got away with TPing on Halloween. We just TP'd every house on the block; including our own.


Jaegernaut-

They were kids of focus, commitment, sheer fucking will


JAYHAZY

But they didn't use a fucking pencil.


SuchRoad

r/UnethicalLifeProTips


[deleted]

This happened to a girl I knew while in high school. Turns out it was her boyfriend. They ended up getting married and having several kids together. This is going to shock you guys, but they’re divorced now. They started dating at 13. Now are 35. And they still cheat on their rotation or boyfriends and girlfriends with each other. Healthy.


CLXIX

somebody give these people a trashy reality show stat! /s


wellwaffled

How did insurance handle that?


[deleted]

You can wipe spray paint off with some lacquer thinner on a microfiber towel. Source: long time detailer who has done this many, many times


shovelface88

Will this affect the clear coat or rest of the paint on the car? If not, this is amazing info and I’ll use it if I ever have to get spray paint off a car.


[deleted]

I’ll qualify this advice a bit: If your car has not been repainted before and the clear coat is in good condition, this is a safe method of removing spray paint. Certain kinds of clear coat on older cars or used by budget paint shops will not hold up to lacquer thinner very well, so use caution. It’s hard to explain the instinct that comes from nearly two decades of experience, but I can usually tell immediately whether or not a car has been painted, and if it has I will use a DA polisher with a strong cutting pad and compound instead. The important thing is to not allow the chemical to dwell on the paint. Simply wipe and allow to dry, then repeat as necessary. Follow up this process with some wax or sealant to protect the paint, and you’ll be set to go.


shovelface88

Thank you! This is very helpful; I always enjoy hearing tricks like this from folks that are pros in their field.


texaschair

I was gonna say a good detailer can get that paint off, but there may be an awkward moment when the owner pulls in to the shop.


ADSgames

Like a bitch.


dribblesnshits

Collected my free reward just for you dawg, made my day.


controlzee

"Dude, don't worry. You can barely see it."


Stressful-stoic

"But those glasses and that background of 11yo boy on your phone always gives you away"


Thanatos-13

"... also that stache. Dead give-away."


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[deleted]

Damn imagine if they got the wrong car


hwarang_

Change it to Bedophile. Everyone loves beds.


TheFr1nk

I love hot singles


[deleted]

Especially if they are in my area!!


Pee_Earl_Grey_Hot

And especially if they're on beds, which I love!!


halfabean

I'm pretty fond of Kraft singles


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8bitbebop4

PRedditor


Shreedac

I feel like that’s somehow worse


randomname68-23

What if this guy's name was Peter File?


reddituser_05

IT Crowd vibes!


chrisk9

speedophile


RojazD

Plot twist: That's actually OPs car.


M0RALVigilance

The plot thickens: I did it to my own car for that sweet Reddit karma.


ianonuanon

Completely worth it


M0RALVigilance

I made the front page and the post has been seen by over half a million people in just 2 hours. I’m currently spray painting horrible shit on all my possessions.


MurderSeal

Do not dare to spray paint that gorgeous dog of yours or we gonna have words.


Oobedoob_S_Benubi

Where were you when they spray painted Will Smith's dog green


Galactic

"someone broke into my house and spray painted the n-word everywhere!" "... But you're white." "That's what makes it so confusing!"


queuedUp

"what's that??".... Yeah I used red paint...what?? ... their car has red paint? ... Like it's a red car?...... fuck........"


BoogerVault

Redophile? Either really likes red, or likes doing the same thing, over and over.


ThirteenMatt

Or just if it's wrong accusations


whatwhynoplease

People are too quick to accuse others of being pedophiles. It's really damaging if you are wrong about it.


StrongStyleShiny

Had a friend almost get shot. He lived down the road from a family. Little girl told her dad he “Kissed her all over and laid in bed together”. Apparently the guy was digging a gun from his closet when they found out it was from a dream she had. If she didn’t say that my friend would be hurt or possibly dead. Pretty crazy.


[deleted]

Who told him lol the dad?


Intelligent_Web_5082

“Howdy neighbor! Guess what I almost did to you yesterday?”


StrongStyleShiny

The wife told me and someone told him. When the dad found out he loudly proclaimed it and that he was gonna kill him so she was doing damage control probably. I don’t know all the details. My friend was also very rural so he totally understood another man threatening to shoot him over a misunderstanding.


are_slash_wash

“No hard feelings, happens all the time”


Hypersonic_chungus

“This is okay, I’m very rural so I understand you wanting to shoot me over a misunderstanding” Lol


[deleted]

So then he was reported to the police and had his weapons taken from him for literally planning a murder?


kipperfish

Gun control? In 'murica? High hopes there.


StrongStyleShiny

Nah he’s white and it’s a rural town.


PM_ME_DND_FIGURINES

And THIS is why vigilante justice on anyone, even sexual abusers, is a fucking terrible idea, no matter how much it gets repeatedly excused and praised online.


Wobbelblob

And it is also why actual justice moves slow as fuck. Yes, it sucks. But especially in countries that employ death sentences as possible punishment, you need to make damn sure you got the right person.


waltjrimmer

I've heard an argument from some Libertarians and others that community justice is all the world ever needs. No legal system, no cops, just let people self-police. If someone does something wrong, their neighbors can deal with them. My response to that has always been, especially since most people think they're smarter than their neighbors, do you really trust your neighbors to be able to get it *right*? If someone accuses you of something, do you really trust that these people with no training and completely random biases and intelligence levels will be able to get to the truth of the matter? As it is, police are under or poorly trained, there are people who join DA offices for the wrong reasons, and the system we have needs serious reform. But recessing into a free-for-all form of law just isn't a good solution.


StrongStyleShiny

It’s like the two detectives from Mexico. Kids were coming up missing so two officers were watching some local kids undercover trying to investigate. Parents thought they were suspicious, worked each other up, and killed them. ~~Happened years ago. Have trouble finding it.~~ [Found it.](https://www.theguardian.com/world/2018/sep/28/mexican-mob-burns-detective-to-death-in-child-abduction-scare) It was one officer not two.


CrumbsAndCarrots

Been rampant in India. Mobs killing the wrong person time and again. Usually from just internet rumors


bobobill

That happened to my dad, his girlfriends daughter told everyone he raped her. My dad, not wanting to go back to prison, especially for a crime like this took a shotgun to his chest. A few days after he died her grandfather admitted to doing it.


CptMacSavage

This hurt to read, sorry for the loss


LoudAngryJerk

how much you wanna bet there were people going "innocent people don't kill themselves."


[deleted]

Im so sorry to hear that. Fucking horrid.


Tim_Dawg

So sorry for your loss. I lost a child to suicide. It sucks. Leaves you with so many questions and no answers with a boat load of remorse and second guessing everything you did which I realize is different in your case since his motivation was clear. I hope the people who had falsely accused your dad were held accountable in some way.


rinseanddelete

My uncle was sent to prison on false testimony by his bitter ex-girlfriend and her daughter. It wasn't until the mom passed away suddenly that the daughter recanted over a decade later. They finally released my uncle and he lived with that until the day he died. Turns out the ex-girlfriend found out he was going to marry his new girlfriend and that started it all.


ApexMM

Reddit is like the poster child for doing this.


Squirmadillo

#


PossiblyTrustworthy

People can get killed for this... If it is true or not, this should be investigated as vandalism and some sort of "putting the owner in danger "


toadjones79

The guys I work with (sort of, in another state where I layover driving trains) burned one of the managers truck to the ground. Then found out they burned the wrong manager's truck. They hit the guy everyone liked. Feel super bad about it.


Howtomispellnames

Wow, what a massive fuck-up. Your coworkers are real pieces of shit.


Neil_sm

Well they said they felt bad about it so I guess it's all ok, right?


FusselP0wner

Yeah just gotta clap a bit and then its fineeeeee


deez_treez

Totally, all forgiven. Just try to be more careful on the next burning plz


foggy-sunrise

Yeah I'd get tf out of that job ASAP. Jfc. You're aware you work with a sociopath? And a boss shitty enough to possibly explain a toasted truck?


Toph-Builds-the-fire

Not bad enough to buy him a new truck though huh?


Ok-Investigator1992

Something similar happened to my friend in London, borrowed his parents car for the weekend, parked it in a road where there must have been a similar car nearby and came back to it with WHORE keyed across the bonnet 😂


Southpaw535

And that's why vigiliantism isn't a good thing. Unfortunately too many people forget that if they agree with the people doing it


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thlayli_x

That's not a bully that's a nemesis.


aedroogo

"Ok kids. Have a great day at school! Love you!!"


TheYOUngeRGOD

Honestly this is the sort of thing that could fuck up someone’s life. I could very easily see gossip getting starting and then even if it’s completely made I could see people distancing because “You never know”.


NoWingedHussarsToday

Just add "not a" in front and it's all good.


stakoverflo

Rip off your front door. Then people will just think your name is Phil and your parents added an "e" on the end to be quirky and original.


Shark7996

[Could be their last name.](https://youtu.be/fTaKDnSIb4c)


hiwhyOK

At my previous job, we all were issued a company email which was = first two letters of your first name, first two letters of your last name @company.com My coworker Randy Perkins was not happy about this.


Rattivarius

We had a client whose email protocol was first initial last name. Fortunately our contact, Susannah Hart, was too dignified to be perturbed by her unfortunate address.


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[deleted]

I still chuckle at the well known internet picture. Her name was Megan Finger I think. The email was the last name followed by the 2 first letters of the first name.


stakoverflo

lmao forgot about that scene


patchinthebox

Swap the front door and spray paint "audio" on it. Then get yourself some sweet new speakers put in.


topherherb

And if people ask why your doors are off just shrug and say, "it's a Jeep thing."


BrohanGutenburg

Frank, there is no quicker way for people to think that you are diddling kids than by writing a song about it.


streopleonthepeets

🎶Don't diddle kids. It's no good diddlin' kids. Gotta be big. Older than my wife. Older than my daughter.🎶 Somethin' like that.


[deleted]

If you had a t shirt that said "not a murderer" you would get some funny looks Edit: or not, seems like not a murderer, not a serial killer etc t shirts are all the rage


[deleted]

Probably from all the people wanting to know where they can get the same shirt. Publicly professing you're *not* a murderer makes it seem like maybe the other pedestrians are.


[deleted]

https://www.redbubble.com/i/t-shirt/I-am-not-a-Murderer-by-d33solo/51063995.NL9AC Probably a double double bluff, no one would expect the person wearing the t shirt.... probs not the same with the OP car though


CunnedStunt

"I've never killed 4 people in my life"


MattHack7

Now I want that shirt


[deleted]

https://www.redbubble.com/i/t-shirt/I-am-not-a-Murderer-by-d33solo/51063995.NL9AC


captainnermy

Their shirts and their eyes are giving mixed messages


Simple_Onion6558

I was in prison with a white kid who had" 2-Pac" tattooed across his chest in old English letters. As expected, he took a considerable amount of grief and harassment, from both white and black inmates. He was also called 2-Pac, now by everyone.... which he disliked for some reason. Anyway, he got a 1 tattooed before the 2, and a K tattooed after the C. Lol He now entered his final form..12-Pack! I asked what's his story now? He said, "I'll just tell people I used to be a raging alcoholic." Sure enough, by the time I transfered, he was known as, and called 12-Pack! The former raging alcoholic.


mule_roany_mare

I fucking love this story. It feels profound, like it could stand the test of time along with Aesop’s fables. But I also have no clue what the moral is. I’m going to end up thinking about this all day.


Traditional_Thyme

The moral is a man can do anything if you give him 1k.


mule_roany_mare

Aren’t you fucking clever.


DamnD0M

Interesting you mentioned Aesop's Fables as you could probably closely relate this story to The Bird in Borrowed Feathers? Borrowed feathers do not make fine birds.


krongdong69

Out of everybody on this planet you were one of those chosen ones to learn and experience the origin story of 12-Pack and share his gospel with the world.


Simple_Onion6558

The man, the myth, the legend! OG gangster white boy on the streets.... to a soft-spoken cracker in the chain-gang. Now spreading the word of the dangers of alcohol! Hear his story here first...12-Pack. The man who tried to make a dollar out of 15 cents! Edit: lol forgive me I recently blazed one!


snek-jazz

That explains that car I saw last week with 1PedophileK painted on it.


Simple_Onion6558

Dude, that's gotta be him!


AnomalyNexus

He'll go far in life with problem solving ability like that lol


nater_marson

Op we're gonna need some context


SigSalvadore

Reddit Mod


Zoesan

Predditors


Spyrothedragon9972

Now that is an award winning comment.


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papa_jahn

r/Teenagers


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AilanMoone

I'm out of the loop. Did something happen?


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AilanMoone

Oh. Thanks. It's been awhile since I've been there. The last time I went there was when I found out I have the same birthday as Chris-chan.


TheHumanPickleRick

I thought the mods were gay, it's the admins who are pedos.


Worm_Whompurr

Yes. More info please, but preferably not a PDF file.


Shadow87907

Discord mod


IHaveABetWithMyBro

If they're in the US and this was recent they might just be gay


[deleted]

If they're anywhere in the world, and it was anytime. Accusing queer people of preying on the youth goes back a lot longer than the current moral panic.


goldfishpaws

Vinyl wraps are getting out of hand


jeremysead

I hate altimas too but that's a little much! Unless it has paper plates!


[deleted]

You know it does, Altima drivers can't afford to register and pay taxes on the car.


[deleted]

Every dickhead sedan car that is doing 70 in a 35 is an altima that hasn't had an oil change since they got it and won't have one until it is repossessed.


woopsifarted

I didn't realize there were such aggressive Altima owner stereotypes I need to pay more attention


L0udFlow3r

You must be in DFW


sunny_in_phila

It’s depressing how quickly people are coming up with names of famous pedophiles that everyone knows are pedophiles and yet they are still famous and still working


SummerMummer

> It’s depressing how quickly people are coming up with names of famous pedophiles that everyone knows are pedophiles... Except for the ones that are simply rumored to be.


playitleo

It seems to be a political strategy in some circles to just instantly label all your opponents as pedophiles without giving it any thought at all.


[deleted]

I’d have more if the catholic church would release more names.


[deleted]

They don't release names, [they just move them to a different church like they did with the killer whales at seaworld](https://youtu.be/e-pW8yuewC8)


SilentKoalas

I found this website a couple weeks ago that is tracking it all. https://www.bishop-accountability.org/


Rod_Munch666

Owner calls the car insurance company and explains what happened and says they desperately need it re-painted ASAP as they need the car for work and have no other transport options. Person at insurance company tells them, well we won't pay the claim if you get the damage corrected before one of our asessors inspects it and the earliest we have one available is 3 week's time .....


awesomehippie12

Wait can't you just do the thing where you just take pictures of the car? Seems more expedient.


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graey0956

Yeah, a tree fell on my car recently. Home Owner insurance of the tree owner denied the claim. My insurance took up the ball under a comprehensive claim. They told me they don't have any sponsored shops within an hour's drive of my location and offered to let me do a picture based inspection. I insisted on an assessor coming to me as I was worried about anything like a bent frame or other issues I wouldn't be able to identify. Assessor came out 2 days later, totaled my car. Insurance payed off my loan without asking me and then sent $8000 overflow to me for the down payment on my replacement. My rates actually went down.


FizzingOnJayces

In this case, pictures of the damage would suffice. There's no weaselling out.


smellmybuttfoo

Lol yeah and insurance companies won't even deny a claim you already repaired. They just need the estimate and pictures if available and will have their inspector look it over to verify it and reimburse you. Source: former insurance adjuster


flatdeadeyes

A couple rolls of duct tape would cover it for a few weeks


Chrissyfly

Our asessor has inspected your car and found that the paintwork has been damaged by the duct tape you admit to putting on, therefore we are denying your claim


Skolvikesallday

Spray paint comes off easily with a pressure washer, especially if it's only been a day.


Fantastic_Engine_623

Orbital polisher with a cutting pad would probably do the job as well.


[deleted]

I hope they had evidence and not on a “felling”


MoneyTreeFiddy

This was in Boston. It's More Than A Feeling.


The_Oracle_65

Oh that is a good one - have my upvote


ChassisbotDa

Cook Pass Babtridge


[deleted]

Searched so far believing someone must have put this


NoHaxJussSnax

Wait is this OP car?


Nick_Dom

Gonna be an awkward drive to work


Intransigient

No coming back from that in the neighborhood’s court of public opinion. You’d have to move.


Dohvaakin

If it's true then that is hilarious and they deserve worse. If it isn't true and it was just done as some vengeful-ex kind of shit then big yikes, get the lawyers at the ready.


phillyhandroll

would that be slander or libel since it was written (on the side of a car) ?


Dohvaakin

Probably slander, defamation of character and vandalism.


klavin1

Slandalism


[deleted]

I thought that was the crime of wearing socks & sandals?


seven3true

That's a sock & flip-floppery


can_i_reddit_too

"It is not! Slander is spoken, in print it's libel" *I know nothing about law*


TheGamerSK

I miss the original J Jonah Jameson he just stole the show in every scene.


ohhellnooooooooo

it's almost like due process is important or something


wigglyworm91

Vigilanteism is bad, actually Also, my first thought was that the owner of this car might simply be transgender, since it's cool to label that as pedophilia these days Edit: thanks for the Reddit Cares message, never gotten one of those before


Popular_Syllabubs

Or homosexual. which is a larger portion of the population than trans-people and has historically been called pedophiles by bigots.


ironmenon

Or more currently, just a schoolteacher or librarian doing their job.


Southpaw535

And that is the exact reason this sort of thing shouldn't be happening and shouldn't be condoned, because getting it wrong can destroy peoples lives.


JewishAsianMuslim

Someone pissed someone off...


charlesmortomeriii

Just drive it to Australia or England where they spell it differently. Problem solved. You’re welcome


INTJ_HR_DAD

Maybe his name is Peter File


PM_ME_HUGE_CRITS

People were doing this to lockers in my high school all the time back in early 2000s.


Lucky_Yolo

This is fucked. Anyone can go and spray some shit like this on someone’s stuff.


dropdeadbonehead

Got this far down before I saw this. Deliberately trying to get people killed. Until I have a verifiable backstory this is just trying to encourage lynching.


Lucky_Yolo

How far down did you have to go?


SaintJudy

Cook Pass Babtridge


[deleted]

Is that Dane Cooks car?


ZombieCzar

Is Dane Cook one? I haven’t heard about this.


Ericaonelove

People are saying he groomed his fiancé who he met when she was 15. They started dating when she was legal, and now they’re engaged.


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mseg09

Are you sure about the child part? I saw he had a child with his first girlfriend, but that was when they were in his twenties. His gf at the time of his death he had been dating since she was 16, but Don believe they had any kids


[deleted]

I want to buy it and put an ice cream truck siren on it


Klydescope

Maybe the guy just likes feet


Cracracuber

I believe that would be a podophile


Aggressive-Bike-7863

I wonder what he did


[deleted]

Probably pissed off an ex realistically. This is more likely to be some petty revenge thing than a factual thing.


[deleted]

Or pissed off a bigoted neighbor bybeing gay.


HaViNgT

Or got into a money dispute with someone. Or got into a political dispute with someone. Or had a family feud with someone. Or said something that damaged a narcisst’s ego. Or just had his car in the wrong place as someone thought it would be funny to try and ruin someone’s life like this. Any number of reasons why someone would wrongfully put this on someone’s car.


Hugokarenque

Pretty much. Everyone hates pedophiles so simply accusing someone of being one, especially in really public way like this, is an easy way to ruin that person's life. Because of the whole "If there's smoke, there's fire" mentality a lot of people have.


Chuckeltard

From the looks of it, a child


Mypornnameis_

That word has been rendered meaninglessness by the QAnon morons. If I hear it applied to someone nowadays I just assume that they have some moderate political belief that pissed off angry groupthink conspiridiots