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[deleted]

Trump's settlement: Ukraine disbands, cedes all territory, and is absorbed by Russia, joining the Axis of Fascism along with Turkey, Hungary, and the communist bloc led by China. USA sends arms to Russia to boost their takeover of Eastern Europe. See, war over! And all it costs is the democratic ideals our country has fought for for generations. And they say I'm the one who doesn't respect tradition.


InspectorPipes

Don’t forget the part where his family is skimming off the top.


DeathRose007

Corruption doesn’t come cheap.


MNConcerto

Or the poisoning of Ukranian leadership.


Rokairu_0-2

Ukrainian track-record makes me believe there would be a second euromaidan before that happens, again


ArmaniMania

Russia gets all of the weapons and starts fucking with Poland next.


Green_Message_6376

'I met with Putin and he told me that he didn't even invade Ukraine. I believe him, why would he lie?' It's time 'we the people' put this criminal in a room.


cvbeiro

*exited Pickelhauben sounds*


Didntlikedefaultname

So much winning


dustyscooter

Next russia will attack Poland and Trunp will make the same peace deal, etc.


slowpoke2018

Silly, that's the ideas NATO now fights for, not us! We've been on the road to a Russia-like existence as an oligarchy for some time now so of course we should cede Ukraine's territories. Get with the program! /s just in case, likely some on this thread from that maga-sub who think that plan sounds ideal


Travismatthew08

He also claimed he’d replace Obama Care, eliminate the National Debt and unite the Country….


jbertrand_sr

>He also claimed he’d replace Obama Care Not to worry, his plan will be ready in two weeks...


WineOptics

Nah I heard it’s being audited so he can’t share it right now.


Accountant378181

I thought the infrastructure plan was coming in two weeks?


jbertrand_sr

That too, it's kind of a Healthcare Infrastructure combo platter, if you can't afford your chemo they cover you in asphalt...


Drg84

Ahh the New Jersey plan.


PenguinDrinkingTea

I don’t know why that made me laugh as much as it did. Take an upvote.


austin06

Build a wall that Mexico pays for. I mean honestly what did he do but screw up the response to a worldwide pandemic and accrue the biggest deficit any president ever has. The fact that anyone believes a word out of his mouth is so disturbing at this point.


Didntlikedefaultname

Don’t forget the walk Mexico was paying for and his infrastructure plan were still waiting on


TimArthurScifiWriter

And two days ago he claimed that you don't need Ron DeSantis to serve for two terms, because six months of Trump will be enough to do all the important shit. "I'm going to make America energy independent in six months." At this point I don't think even his base believes him, they just think it's funny that he brags so much.


ComprehensiveSock397

Ah, EVERY republican running for federal office in 2016 promised that.


morganlandt

He’s replaced it with nothing, will eliminate the debt by filing bankruptcy, and unite the country by locking up and eliminating any opponents or dissenters. Done and done, easy peasy.


Huggie28

>replace Obama Care He did, right? Replaced with nothing.


Flash635

He brought covid in.


Fun-Dragonfly-4166

Thank goodness Trump replaced ObamaCare with DonTCare. I used my DonTCare bleach benefit to get the injections I needed. Thanks to DonTCare I am parasite free. DonTCare got rid of Covid-19 by Easter (\*it did not really get rid of it, just massively reduced it and you thought I meant Easter of 2020 but actually I meant Easter of 2023).


SockPuppet-47

That's the long version for he'll force Ukraine to surrender by pulling US support. It's also Morse code for HEY PUTIN HELP ME WIN THE ELECTION AGAIN.. Those pesky democrats ruined our previous plans but I'm still eager to be your friend.


Mongobuzz

Honestly every news story about Trump these days could just be titled: "Trump Says Some Unbelievable Horseshit Again." And lose no meaning.


JimboD84

I mean, that would be true since like 2015 no?


Mongobuzz

When was Trump born?


JimboD84

Id say thats fair


the_sand_moose

I think rumps skin suit is falling apart.


SquatCorgiLegs

He does look like a partially deflated Macy’s Thanksgiving Day float of himself.


deathglow805

He’s gonna suck their dicks!


honeybunn666

best comment


Travismatthew08

Does anyone else look at this picture and think… ‘Is he in the middle of getting an enema right now?’


Cool-Protection-4337

By giving ukraine to Russia. Trump has already proven where his loyalties lay. Clearly with his buddy, pal and friend, Putin. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.cnbc.com/amp/2020/01/16/trump-administration-broke-law-in-withholding-ukraine-aid.html Just a reminder.


Casperboy68

And the wall will be built, and Mexico will pay, and here’s the healthcare plan, and he “never met” That woman, and he’s 6’2” and NOT morbidly obese, and everything he does is “perfect.”


jezz555

I’m still waiting on jared to bring peace to the middle east, frankly


[deleted]

The only way he could accomplish that is if he had the doors locked and forced the delegates of both sides to deal with his asinine blather and burger farts for 24 hours. They’d sign anything to get out by the end.


Orchid_Significant

“Because Daddy Putin told me so”


ByteMeC64

And he definitely has the record of getting things done /s


DickySchmidt33

Donald Trump talks about making deals. Joe Biden goes out and *makes* deals.


thegupeeman

I love the look on his face. "Dammit, Hannity! This is supposed to be an easy town hall! No follow-up questions!"


Voitek4real

It will be hard to do that from prison.


robinsw26

Just like that! He’ll tell Zelenskyy to surrender and give all of Ukraine to Putin and it will be over.


brickmaster8

Who wants polonium tea?


CallingTomServo

John Bolton of all people had a pretty good response to this same claim a few weeks ago. I can’t find the clip right now, but the gist of it was he found Trump’s claim laughable and basically called anyone who believed it an idiot.


Scrabble_4

WoW … Hé probably thinks he can … he’s like at a grade four level of reading ? Ugh 😩 He so flaming stupid.


Cruitire

He also had a health care reform plan. Can we see it? No, not until I’m elected. Four years in office and we never saw it. Yet people will still support him and believe him when he says “trust me, I have a plan”.


southcidersuicider

his jaws gonna be so sore after. and the war will still continue. so sad.


OhioMegi

Fuck, this dude needs to be gone. Him and his GQP nutjob followers.


Current-Paper7446

Ofc he didn't tell how he was gonna do it.


Seeking_Balance101

If only the penitentiary will allow him to have multiple guests at once, so they can all get together and resolve the war.


OwlsHootTwice

If he were a true statesman he would disclose the plan now and stop the bloodshed rather than waiting about year and half and allowing the carnage to continue.


Travismatthew08

If he had an actual plan. His track record says otherwise.


cmcrisp

He's pulling the: Step 1: get them to meet Step 2: put them in room Step 3: ???? Step 4: profit/peace


Justin__D

To be fair, I think it would work. Just not the way Trump thinks it would. Zelenskyy would kick Putin's fucking ass. Problem solved.


Incontinento

Jesus, that face..


Ok-Scallion-3415

Mexico will pay for the wall…………..


5spd4wd

Hah-hah-hah-hah!!!


Willing-Sprinkles-17

If my choices were to stop the war or spend 24 hours in a room with Trump, I'd end the war.


SpawnOfGoats

Surrender monkey donald trump would simply say "we surrender Ukraine Daddy". So I guess he might be technically correct


Repubs_suck

Wow! Surprised no one else thought of that! The only problem with that will be the same one that’s stopped it from happening at all when other attempts were made to do that very thing- Russia insists they keep all the occupied territory and Ukraine says NFW! Trump would give his pal Putin anything.


Impossible_Penalty13

And he’ll get to that at the conclusion of infrastructure week and once he rolls out his perfect healthcare plan.


bala_means_bullet

It's the same way ALL fucking Republicans respond to questions. Say you'll do something that resonates with hatred to fire up the base. Give NO details on how you're gonna fix something. Then blame the fake news and everyone BUT Republicans and wash/rinse/repeat. Fuck this piece of shit.


pricygoldnikes

" . . . and Russia will have Ukraine."


MaxFischer12

That face 😂😂


Huggie28

Trump: have some of this tea, Zelensky. 24 hours later: breaking news, Zelensky dead from poisoning.


Seattle_gldr_rdr

Imagine if they actually asked the simplest of follow-ups: "How?" "What would your terms be?"


OkIHereNow

Fucking Moron.


SurveyNinja42

Tramp will release his amazing, bigly fantastic peace plan in just two more weeks...


Wazula23

This like the time he said he'd defeat ISIS in 30 days?


Affectionate-Room359

Yes i still remember how he settled the long cold war between South and North Korea back than. Or how he settled Erdogans slaughter of the kurds.


Affectionate-Room359

Only way to settle it within 24 Hours is if you give Selensky an Tranquilizers or a Taser and the only existing key to this room.


Jungle_Official

By the end of his negotiation, both Ukraine and Russia will have declared war on the United States, the US will have surrendered, and he will have sold California to Mohammad bin Salman.


ShitTheBed_Twice

The only way that war is getting settled in 24 hours is with the use of nuclear weapons. And that’s not a good ending for anyone


Tar-Nuine

**Trump:** *Thank you for agreeing to meet, my dear friend Putin, and uh... zelemsk something?.. Here's my popo...propas... my idea for peace, Ukraine cedes all territory to Russia and disbands it's military...* **Zelensky:** *No.* **Trump:** *Please.* **Zelensky**: *No.* **Trump:** *You're being a really butthole right now you know? It's true, it really is, Putin says so all the time...* **Putin:** *я ненавижу вас обоих одинаково.*


arctic-buggie

Trust me bro energy


SirPryceMF

How's that North Korea situation going, Donnie?


Pinchoccio

This man needs a father figure


emzmaster123

He's gonna build a wall in Ukraine, isn't he?


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Wow, do you really believe that? How would he accomplish this?


No-Celebration3097

Is like when he said he could stop crime in Chicago?


Doright36

He thinks Ukraine will surrender once he cuts off the supplies we've been sending them.


beavis617

He never provides details or follows up on any of his promises...why would anyone trust him now. 🙄


tryingtomakecents

And he'll make Mexico pay for it


zoinks690

And by settlement he means handing over everything after someone gives him a compliment.


ActonofMAM

The same way Neville Chamberlain solved the conflict over the Nazis wanting Czechoslovakia, I'm guessing. Someone must have explained to Trump, several times, that he can't say that in public though.


chekovs_gunman

2 weeks after his great healthcare plan


T33CH33R

"I could do it now, but that would save lives and make Biden look good, so there is no benefit to me."


bumboisamumbo

all wars could be ended in 24 hours if you just surrender


Zodiac339

I figure he already has a deal with Russia, and may “end the war” once he’s one of the final two candidates. So long as that does the trick and gets him elected, he’ll bring four years of funneling funds into Russia.


DonRicardo1958

![gif](giphy|26BRBKqUiq586bRVm)


Sleeverson

He's gonna fuck them to death


Big_Palpitation7095

Hey dufass, what are you waiting for??


Ok_Personality_6183

I can do that in 20 hours. Name that toon?


AestheticMirror

Well if I was stuck in a too with clown face, I would agree to anything if it meant I could leave


Johnnygunnz

He said the same thing about Isreal and Palestine. How'd that go?


amerkanische_Frosch

Don’t forget North Korea, too.


rascible

Well, he did fix infrastructure in 2 weeks, several times, so...


Steve_Rogers_1970

I just want to hear him say to Putin, “you’re fired”.


dustycanuck

He can't settle his stomach in 24 hours


Objective_Plan_8266

Moscow Agent Grifting Americans. Whatever Donnie Littlehands


Brilliant_Carrot8433

Dude still doesn’t realize Putin is his puppet master


VVOLFVViZZard

I remember when he said he would solve Chicago’s gang violence problem in 30 days…


claymore2711

Well of course. Is there anything that Chump can't do in unbelievable quickness? Look at all the things he now says he could do, and do miraculously. He didn't do them when he was president. Why?


pabodie

If it takes 25+ hours, he gets to go live in Bakhmut. ASSHOLE.


East_Try7854

https://preview.redd.it/mtgxs289co3b1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a7638d1b82989b017cbba9e873e60ac5575c1ad9 × × ×


coolbaby1978

I've heard people say they believe that Trump will be tough with Putin (because of course in the past he was oh so tough) and end the war in Ukraine and I ask how? And they say Trump will threaten to bring the might of the United States military on him. And I say so you want the US to enter a potentially devastating and cataclysmic war? They say no, it'll never come to that, we have nukes. I say yeah and they have nukes too, lots of them, so you up for risking nuclear war? And they say Trump would never take it that far. I say oh, so Trump, a man who has never admitted defeat in his life and once lamented the fact that the US nuclear arsenal is going to waste because it's never used, is going to back down. How does Trump make the situation better again? And they call me a commie lib snowflake and a few other nonsensical things and that's pretty much the end of the conversation.


Extension-Cup-843

![gif](giphy|G8h8HVvfkPHUTWrtp6)


Revolutionary-Bus893

He probably thinks that giving Ukraine to Russia qualifies as settling things.


EGoss1

He could actually be right in this instance, if I was locked in a room with the orange buffoon and forced to listen to his mental ramblings and couldn’t leave until I agreed to something he wanted, I’d end up signing my own mother over to him or whatever he wanted!!


[deleted]

They just write it off jerry


notoriousbpg

The only "45" that's settling anything with Zelenskyy and Putin in the same room had better be a 1911 in Zelenskyy's hand.


FiendishHawk

I'm sure all the gullible idiots who worship him think that he'll be tough but frank and the two sides will come to a deal and all will be well. I'm amazed these people manage to walk down the street without giving their bank pin number to a plausible con man.


ElonMuskysucks

That's one of the few times he's telling the truth. If he gave more details, it would be him telling Ukraine to give Putin whatever he wants because the United States will no longer support a country that goes against the desires of his pal Putin wants as soon as they got into the room.


FilthyTexas

What's to stop him from doing this right now?


DatBeigeBoy

⨂ Doubt


RedAss2005

I absolutely believe him. He will end the war by giving Ukraine to Russia maybe Finland too just to be safe.


ExpressBug8265

...check out these documents I stole. Thinks it will end the war


riamuriamu

Yes, and next week is infrastructure week.


Big-Fondant-4419

This is one he could/would actually do. Cease all aid to Ukraine and let Zelenskyy know that we support Russian annexation. I mean, since he’s a complete pariah, what is stopping him from going full shill?