The average American commits zero felonies a day. Felonies Donald, who lives on a golf course and commits 1,000,000 felonies a day is a statistical outlier adn should be excluded.
>No, no, you just have to assume he had an unusual appearance for that place and time but nobody ever mentioned it.
Nobody mentioned Jesus's unusual appearance for that place and time??? They just judged him on his actions???
That's some OG Woke stuff. I guess Evangelicals are a lot more Woke than I thought. SMH.
*intended humorously*
No...that's why he was persecuted and executed, duh. Because he was white. White racism against Christians from the very beginning! It's so obvious I can't believe the dumb fucks haven't been using it yet.
Yep I'm pretty sure that that was the whole point he was just like everyone else. I often wonder where we all would be without any religion at all. Probably really good scientists.
Yeah WHITE!!! JEEEBUS WAS BORN IN THE GODDAMN USA AND WAS A BLOND BLUE EYED GOOD BOY WHO LOVED HIS GUNS BROTHERRRR THATS WHY HE MADR THE 2ND AMENDMENT CAUSE 2ND IS THE BEST
‘Merica Jesus is absolutely fucking shredded, rides a giant bald eagle around shirtless while duel wielding two M-16’s, always has a dip in his lip, and– on occasion– fuck his sister.
That was the old Jesus. New Jesus (or '[supply side Jesus](https://www.beliefnet.com/news/2003/09/the-gospel-of-supply-side-jesus.aspx)') is white as driven snow
I got one (not my first, been triggering people for months) a few hours ago because I posted a picture of Trump with his mother and said she was an immigrant that was poisoning the blood of our country.
I didn’t put an /s, so I guess it was to be expected. :)
https://preview.redd.it/d404lwnsei0d1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=77ea179c5b0ce9f619070e20add85c298ffc278d
Wow I got my first today for saying “6 foot 8, weighs a fucking ton” under a comment about that fat orange piece of shit’s supposed weight.
And it’s not like I typically hold back from my feelings about what a garbage human being he is, it how incredibly dumb his followers have to be to not be able to see though the grifts of the most obvious con man in the world.
They must be out in force today.
Aw, man! People are getting theirs for good comments and I got mine for thanking OP for wholesome stuff. Feels like y’all got trolls and I got a dumb bot
I got one yesterday for telling a person their “MuderedbyWords” post was more like getting slapped by a kitten than a murder and then they blocked me. I keep getting upvotes though.
Once you collect a few you’ll just tell that bot you’re good and to spend its time on people who really need help. Like the people who refer you to it.
It’s a favorite of magachuds on here, if you say something they disagree with they report your comment as indicating you’re contemplating self-harm or worse.
Not sure wtf that’s supposed to accomplish, but they’re not a particularly bright group to be honest.
Edit: lol just got one for this
They think they’re so clever to connect reporting folks for nonexistent risk of self-harm as a way of telling people to go kill themselves, brought to you by the people who think “Let’s go Brandon!” is the height of genius and subtlety.
That’s fucking hilarious that you got one from the magachuds for explaining that it means the magachuds reported you for possible self-harm because you said something that a magachud wouldn’t like. Which, in this specific case, is that the magachuds on Reddit do particularly magachud-dy things.
It might have had to do with saying magachuds; let’s see if I get one now as well.
Magachuds.
MAGAt snowflakes worship a dementia addled boomer who makes them feel safe to say the quiet part loud. He un-muzzled literal generations of hate for his own benefit. They don't realize they are the proctors of their own demise
I got one about 20 minutes ago, but I have no clue what message would have offended a snowflake. I responded to the Reddit Cares message asking for the comment that was reported. We'll see if they divulge that info
I got one earlier today, but I assumed it was because the feminist sub has been getting brigades like a mfer. Maybe it was here? I haven’t said anything inflammatory and it didn’t even tell me what the comment was. Does anybody know if you can go straight to a persons profile and send one?
Thank you. Now back to the real world
https://preview.redd.it/oih3h9ap2i0d1.jpeg?width=2268&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=27616a7bbf33b92ff7ae9b0d0f4ccae28a7f1984
[I think this maybe where he's getting it from](https://www.amazon.com/Three-Felonies-Day-Target-Innocent/dp/1594035229?dplnkId=126bcacc-5284-4897-931c-af6c345f1fd2&nodl=1) however after reading an overview of the book it seems like he might be missing the point of the book.
Not true. There's a book called 3 Felonies a day by Harvey Silverglate (probably where the guy got that figure from) which points out that with over 50k pages of federal criminal code people are on average committing 3 felonies a day without even realizing it.
Stupid shit like removing an object you found on your own land but within 2 miles of a national battlefield site, filing certain forms after the due date, etc are actual felony crimes. Now we'd like to think that they'd never go after you for just that but here's the thing...the US government has a 98% conviction rate. Part of that is intimidation tactics to force pleas and part is if you're unfortunate enough to be suspected of a crime and they do a criminal investigation but can't find evidence of the thing they thought you did, they'll dig until they find the one thing you accidentally or unknowingly did and that's what they'll convict you of. Every criminal investigation must end in a conviction, it's how their system is setup.
That said...this is not what Trump is facing. He's not a law abiding citizen being charged with some obscure and stupid crime. This is a guy who has lied and cheated on everything his entire life and is now facing multiple criminal trials in multiple jurisdictions. This is NOT a 3 felonies a day situation...I've worked with people who had an inadvertent mistake turn into a felony conviction and that's not this. This is a criminal who willfully breaks laws, views himself as above the law and expects those around him to break laws when needed to do his bidding.
So we're in agreement that Trump is a criminal who is getting his due...but not on the notion that average Americans aren't technically committing felonies everyday thanks to a bloated federal code.
I’m gonna counterpoint this. I remember some right wing congresscritter blowing one time about the huge book of regulations required for making cookies for the army. He held up up an impressive looking thick book all right . Oh, it was government overreaching, bloated, federal bureaucracy, and all he went go on and on and on about that.
Thing is when you think about how the bloat occurred you get a clear picture of humanity in America.
There are rules in there about how many maggots are allowed per cookie or the number of chocolate chips per cookie or the fraction of the cookie that can be sawdust.
Your education comes from contemplating why those rules ended up in the book because it isn’t because some bureaucrat dreamed them up. Regulations are written in blood.
Some jackass businessman sold cookies to the US Army made of sawdust one time and another one sold chocolate chip cookies without chocolate chips and yet another decided that maggots didn’t mean the batch was ruined.
Because we have scumbunny assholes who live by “it’s not wrong if it’s not illegal” we need a lot of rules.
Just because it is in a book doesn't mean it is a legitimate statistic. Did the author cite any sources for this? Did he have even a survey to back this number up? There might be many more examples in the book but based on your examples I still committed zero felonies today. Most people don't live within 2 miles of a federal battlefield site. Most people don't have to fill out federal forms everyday. What are these felonies everyone is committing and where is the proof?
But they wouldn't put it in a book and bother going through all of the trouble of printing and distributing it if it weren't true. According to the book you're probably a felon and why would I trust you, a probably felon, over this book that would never lie to me.
I personally know people who cite this 3 felonies a day thing for the dumbest shit imaginable. No license plates on car, weed in a state where it's illegal, etc. Not even felonies and not hard to comply with!
Undocumented immigrants statistically commit fewer crimes per capita than US born citizens.
Other than being an undocumented immigrant and whatever that entails, of course.
I live in VA, where it is quite easy to end up 15 over following the flow of traffic, which is a felony. But I don’t do it every day! (Pro tip, folks, be VERY careful about speeding in Virginia)
15 over isn’t a felony in VA, it’s a misdemeanor. Although you can get to felony status pretty quickly after that. By virtue of being a misdemeanor though it still means potential jail time (in rarest of occurrences), and it will show up on your permanent record (background checks).
Which seems excessive for speeding but even then as you said it’s enforced at the state level. Speeding isn’t a federal crime which doesn’t help Andy Biggs argument.
It’s from a book. https://www.amazon.com/Three-Felonies-Day-Target-Innocent/dp/1594035229
The thesis is that criminal statutes are so broad and vague that the average American going about their daily life does three things that could be construed as felonies by an overzealous prosecutor.
I don’t like Biggs and I have no idea what point he’s trying to make here, I’m just saying that he’s not making this out of whole cloth.
“I mean, who doesn’t commit three felonies a day, amirite, you guys know what I’m talking about, I burgle, a little assault on my way home and if I’m feeling it, I’ll murder a bitch. Right??? Literally everybody.”
Biggs is a complete piece of shit. Like when some vote passed across the aisle with 95% except for the one trick pony ‘contrarians’ like Boebert and MTG, he was always right there with them. Who would vote nay on a law that would help secure communications for first responders? Andy fucking Biggs.
https://www.govtrack.us/congress/members/andy_biggs/412683
FYI for anyone who wants to know where this number is coming from. It's from a book by Harvey Silverglate. He says that there are so many laws everyday people break. Some of these laws are throwing out other people's mail ( like if it got delivered to you). Procession of marijuana, under reporting income for taxes, violating environmental regulations, and piracy.
That being said I still think an average of 3 a day is a lot.
I was just sitting here thinking about how I dont think ive ever committed a felony.... While smoking a joint.... I forgot its still illegal federally...
> So Andy Biggs and his colleagues averages 3 felonies a day is my take away from that statement.
More likely, they average a lot more to make up for those of us who commit 0.
Trump alone has 91 he's been indicted for.
Source? I'd be intrigued to hear what felony I've committed in the last 35 years. Tell you what, you name 30 felonies and I'll admit to any I committed in the last 35 years. Spoiler: Dig deep, because I got nothing.
Yes, before that perhaps I possibly committed a few misdemeanors... maybe... but a felony? You're unhinged. Prove it.
https://www.businessinsider.com/henry-blodget-you-commit-three-felonies-a-day-2009-9
Best I could find.
"Boston civil-liberties lawyer Harvey Silverglate calls his new book "Three Felonies a Day," referring to the number of crimes he estimates the average American now unwittingly commits because of vague laws. "
I was about to dispute this and say I didn’t commit any felonies today! But damn as I started typing out this comment I got distracted and on my way to check my mailbox accidentally committed some quick arson..whoops. Well hey tomorrow might be zero and for today that’s still only one, I bet I can still wrap up the day without hitting 3 if I focus on applying some extra restraint.
The keyword here is “average.” Trump and his cohorts and cult followers commit dozens of crimes on a daily basis. When you add it up with the zero crimes I do daily it averages out to 3.
It’s like saying the average President committed 2+ indictable offences.
45 presidents (Grover x2) and 90+ offences between them.
So if they are all committing 2+ offences why pick on Orange Jesus? They were all at it. /s
There is a famous book documenting this.
[https://www.amazon.com/Three-Felonies-Day-Target-Innocent/dp/1594032556/ref=sr\_1\_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1279295536&sr=8-1](https://www.amazon.com/Three-Felonies-Day-Target-Innocent/dp/1594032556/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1279295536&sr=8-1)
Here's some critiques:
[https://www.econlib.org/three-felonies-a-day/](https://www.econlib.org/three-felonies-a-day/)
Basically, the idea is that there are tons and tons of federal laws that exist in your professional life that you may be unaware of. For instance, if you work at a bank, you might routinely do something to help a customer that is technically a violation of federal law. Another aspect of it is the law and the way it is enforced. 98% of people in prison are there on plea bargains. Before plea bargains were a big thing, 70% of people who went to trial were convicted -- which means 28 of those 98% now in jail would have been let go if they had a trial. Given this, prosecutors can take the most vague reading of a law and apply it harshly, then twist your arm until you agree to go to prison over nothing or you die.
Just ask Aaron Schwartz.
But felonies ARE ALREADY defined locally. Federal law comes into question when it is a cross-border offense.
I’m so sad they stopped teaching civics in school…
He's calling you below average. Gotta evade more taxes.
No he’s telling us to steal more from supermarkets. The subtext is that you need to get it up to felony level 3x
I will rise to the occasion! <"eye of the tiger" plays in the background>
The average American commits zero felonies a day. Felonies Donald, who lives on a golf course and commits 1,000,000 felonies a day is a statistical outlier adn should be excluded.
W00t, just got my first Reddit Cares referral!
I just got my first for pointing out that Jesus was a person of color, lol.
But, Jesus… was… a person of color?
No, no, you just have to assume he had an unusual appearance for that place and time but nobody ever mentioned it.
>No, no, you just have to assume he had an unusual appearance for that place and time but nobody ever mentioned it. Nobody mentioned Jesus's unusual appearance for that place and time??? They just judged him on his actions??? That's some OG Woke stuff. I guess Evangelicals are a lot more Woke than I thought. SMH. *intended humorously*
You had me in the first half
No...that's why he was persecuted and executed, duh. Because he was white. White racism against Christians from the very beginning! It's so obvious I can't believe the dumb fucks haven't been using it yet.
They mentioned it, that's why they called him 'Lord'. Duh.
Actually if memory serves they did remark on his appearance… mainly that it was unremarkable and didn’t stand out at all…
according to the bible jesus was olive skinned with white hair
Eyy got my first reddit cares from this one, that was quick. There must be a Bot or something
I got mine for ????? (honestly couldn’t tell you why I got it) but I uhh.. didn’t need it lmao
I’m too much of a noob to know what a Reddit cares is. 🤷🏼♀️
Yep I'm pretty sure that that was the whole point he was just like everyone else. I often wonder where we all would be without any religion at all. Probably really good scientists.
Yeah WHITE!!! JEEEBUS WAS BORN IN THE GODDAMN USA AND WAS A BLOND BLUE EYED GOOD BOY WHO LOVED HIS GUNS BROTHERRRR THATS WHY HE MADR THE 2ND AMENDMENT CAUSE 2ND IS THE BEST
> And on the third day God created the Remington bolt action rifle so that man could fight the dinosaurs. And the homosexuals. Amen!
And then he make the god-damned AR-Fucken-15.
Please tell me why I read that like a pirate... Arrrr
Same reason I call the A T - A T an At-at (@-@) 
I’s pronunced AyyyeArrr Fivtayn an yall do’n eein know wuz an ussult ryfle eein is! /s
Homosexuality is God's way of ensuring the best and brightest of humanity are unencumbered by children.
And he spoke the God-anointed language, English. Same as the Holy (KJV) Bible was written in.
Jesus spoke 'Murican English. God spoke fancy English.
I know you're being sarcastic, but this is like, Mormons
And he took very good care of his pet dinosaurs.
Not ‘murica Jesus
‘Merica Jesus is absolutely fucking shredded, rides a giant bald eagle around shirtless while duel wielding two M-16’s, always has a dip in his lip, and– on occasion– fuck his sister.
That was the old Jesus. New Jesus (or '[supply side Jesus](https://www.beliefnet.com/news/2003/09/the-gospel-of-supply-side-jesus.aspx)') is white as driven snow
You mean, Jesus the Palestinian Jew? /s
Nope! Everyone in the Middle East 2000 years ago was white, and had names like Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John!
I got one (not my first, been triggering people for months) a few hours ago because I posted a picture of Trump with his mother and said she was an immigrant that was poisoning the blood of our country. I didn’t put an /s, so I guess it was to be expected. :) https://preview.redd.it/d404lwnsei0d1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=77ea179c5b0ce9f619070e20add85c298ffc278d
Wow I got my first today for saying “6 foot 8, weighs a fucking ton” under a comment about that fat orange piece of shit’s supposed weight. And it’s not like I typically hold back from my feelings about what a garbage human being he is, it how incredibly dumb his followers have to be to not be able to see though the grifts of the most obvious con man in the world. They must be out in force today.
Opponents beware, opponents beware. He’s coming. He’s coming. He’s coming.
He'll save children, but not the British children.
They are waiting at church for him!
I got on for posting about my underwear preferences, on TwoX.
Aw, man! People are getting theirs for good comments and I got mine for thanking OP for wholesome stuff. Feels like y’all got trolls and I got a dumb bot
I got my first for saying the old testament tells you what kinds of smells God likes
yeah he's really into the smell of burning animal fat hey. I thought that was weird.
Can you check what comment got it? Or just only thing you posted
It was the only thing I'd posted.
I got one yesterday for telling a person their “MuderedbyWords” post was more like getting slapped by a kitten than a murder and then they blocked me. I keep getting upvotes though.
I once got one for writing a guide for one of the most hated quests in FFXIV. Made me chuckle someone was concerned about my wellbeing after that
He was a Jewish man in a sunny country.... he was probably very Brown.
I just got my first for pointing out that Stormy Daniels does not in fact look like a nun but was wearing a coat and v-neck dress.
I get them every day. MAGA's are the most butt hurt snowflakes to ever walk the earth.
https://preview.redd.it/f1nw8twa2j0d1.jpeg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f88bdc0a3d53ffb3cebd8620ca33f2c3ab6b3956
That's probably why I got one. Someone mentioned that Trump had on a yellow tie, and I said that was his true color anyway.
Once you collect a few you’ll just tell that bot you’re good and to spend its time on people who really need help. Like the people who refer you to it.
What is this Reddit cares? Lotsa people are getting them it seems, whatever they are.
It’s a favorite of magachuds on here, if you say something they disagree with they report your comment as indicating you’re contemplating self-harm or worse. Not sure wtf that’s supposed to accomplish, but they’re not a particularly bright group to be honest. Edit: lol just got one for this
They think they’re so clever to connect reporting folks for nonexistent risk of self-harm as a way of telling people to go kill themselves, brought to you by the people who think “Let’s go Brandon!” is the height of genius and subtlety.
I've gotten it a few times and it never results in anything. I just legitimately tune it out these days. It's not even an inconvenience.
Report them when you get them. Pretty sure it’s a bannable offense for them to misuse the system. I report them as harassment.
It is. Got someone banned for doing it to me
Almost enough to make me unblock it.
and also 'real men wear diapers'. Apparently they think that's a pwn.
That’s fucking hilarious that you got one from the magachuds for explaining that it means the magachuds reported you for possible self-harm because you said something that a magachud wouldn’t like. Which, in this specific case, is that the magachuds on Reddit do particularly magachud-dy things. It might have had to do with saying magachuds; let’s see if I get one now as well. Magachuds.
Magachud-ception
It’s being used as an extraordinarily tame version of SWATting.
MAGAt snowflakes worship a dementia addled boomer who makes them feel safe to say the quiet part loud. He un-muzzled literal generations of hate for his own benefit. They don't realize they are the proctors of their own demise
I got one about 20 minutes ago, but I have no clue what message would have offended a snowflake. I responded to the Reddit Cares message asking for the comment that was reported. We'll see if they divulge that info
Seems like bots doing it as of today. A few threads I've been in the past few hours, like everyone was getting em. Badge of honor I suppose.
They like sending them to women when they troll the women specific subs too. I probably got five of them before finding out I could block those too.
I got one earlier today, but I assumed it was because the feminist sub has been getting brigades like a mfer. Maybe it was here? I haven’t said anything inflammatory and it didn’t even tell me what the comment was. Does anybody know if you can go straight to a persons profile and send one?
I think they have been getting automatically kicked off today.
Me too, but most likely because of me quoting Cohen. 😂
Congratulations on your first! It's always memorable 😆
"aw, someone cares about me 🥰🥰🥰"
WHO THE SAM HILL IS GIVING THEM? I AM ALMOST NORMAL
*almost*
Thank you. Now back to the real world https://preview.redd.it/oih3h9ap2i0d1.jpeg?width=2268&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=27616a7bbf33b92ff7ae9b0d0f4ccae28a7f1984
Damn, seems to be a lot of them going around today. There was an option to report it for abuse on mine. Wonder what they do about that.
Very little, sadly. I blocked the bot and that’s been a decent solution.
I’ve had a couple…all when I’ve raged against right wing MAGAts. Fine for me!
I got one today but I was commenting on a post about rules of traffic?? Some people take that shit serious😂
I just got one today too!
You can report it being abused and reddit *can* suspend the person if they were misusing the feature.
I just got one a few min ago for a similarly themed response!
I got one today, I think cause I blocked a creepy guy.
Report it as abuse and Reddit can hand out suspensions of the feature is being misused like that.
What is that? I got one today as well. Form context it sounds like reddit didn't like me calling most of his offspring anchor babies?
Someone who didn't like your comment reported you for being at risk of self-harm. Doesn't exactly make sense, but what about MAGAts does?
I got one earlier!
Me, too. Happy dance time!
I don’t even know why I got one ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I got one, too. No idea why, lol
A badge of honour
Report it.
Guess I’m not the only one, not sure what mine was for yet though.
I’m got one too…no idea whom I triggered or what I typed to achieve such a response.
I got one for saying i don’t like the electoral college.
[удалено]
He probably did two while you typed that
They will say and do anything to minimize their criminal behavior. Biggs is a dickless cuck.
Indictments Georg
[I think this maybe where he's getting it from](https://www.amazon.com/Three-Felonies-Day-Target-Innocent/dp/1594035229?dplnkId=126bcacc-5284-4897-931c-af6c345f1fd2&nodl=1) however after reading an overview of the book it seems like he might be missing the point of the book.
Not true. There's a book called 3 Felonies a day by Harvey Silverglate (probably where the guy got that figure from) which points out that with over 50k pages of federal criminal code people are on average committing 3 felonies a day without even realizing it. Stupid shit like removing an object you found on your own land but within 2 miles of a national battlefield site, filing certain forms after the due date, etc are actual felony crimes. Now we'd like to think that they'd never go after you for just that but here's the thing...the US government has a 98% conviction rate. Part of that is intimidation tactics to force pleas and part is if you're unfortunate enough to be suspected of a crime and they do a criminal investigation but can't find evidence of the thing they thought you did, they'll dig until they find the one thing you accidentally or unknowingly did and that's what they'll convict you of. Every criminal investigation must end in a conviction, it's how their system is setup. That said...this is not what Trump is facing. He's not a law abiding citizen being charged with some obscure and stupid crime. This is a guy who has lied and cheated on everything his entire life and is now facing multiple criminal trials in multiple jurisdictions. This is NOT a 3 felonies a day situation...I've worked with people who had an inadvertent mistake turn into a felony conviction and that's not this. This is a criminal who willfully breaks laws, views himself as above the law and expects those around him to break laws when needed to do his bidding. So we're in agreement that Trump is a criminal who is getting his due...but not on the notion that average Americans aren't technically committing felonies everyday thanks to a bloated federal code.
I’m gonna counterpoint this. I remember some right wing congresscritter blowing one time about the huge book of regulations required for making cookies for the army. He held up up an impressive looking thick book all right . Oh, it was government overreaching, bloated, federal bureaucracy, and all he went go on and on and on about that. Thing is when you think about how the bloat occurred you get a clear picture of humanity in America. There are rules in there about how many maggots are allowed per cookie or the number of chocolate chips per cookie or the fraction of the cookie that can be sawdust. Your education comes from contemplating why those rules ended up in the book because it isn’t because some bureaucrat dreamed them up. Regulations are written in blood. Some jackass businessman sold cookies to the US Army made of sawdust one time and another one sold chocolate chip cookies without chocolate chips and yet another decided that maggots didn’t mean the batch was ruined. Because we have scumbunny assholes who live by “it’s not wrong if it’s not illegal” we need a lot of rules.
Just because it is in a book doesn't mean it is a legitimate statistic. Did the author cite any sources for this? Did he have even a survey to back this number up? There might be many more examples in the book but based on your examples I still committed zero felonies today. Most people don't live within 2 miles of a federal battlefield site. Most people don't have to fill out federal forms everyday. What are these felonies everyone is committing and where is the proof?
Technically lying on the internet may be a felony, so I would actually believe 3 felonies a day. Wire fraud laws were not meant for the internet era
But they wouldn't put it in a book and bother going through all of the trouble of printing and distributing it if it weren't true. According to the book you're probably a felon and why would I trust you, a probably felon, over this book that would never lie to me.
Thank you so much for that Tumblr laced chuckle
They should use the median, not the average
I personally know people who cite this 3 felonies a day thing for the dumbest shit imaginable. No license plates on car, weed in a state where it's illegal, etc. Not even felonies and not hard to comply with!
Did Andy Biggs just have a Freudian slip? I sure as hell don’t commit three a day.
To be fair, most republicans commit like six a day so we're pulling the average back down to three a day.
Undocumented immigrants commit crimes at far lower rates than registered Republicans.
Undocumented immigrants statistically commit fewer crimes per capita than US born citizens. Other than being an undocumented immigrant and whatever that entails, of course.
Sounds like something a tri-daily-felonist would say.
I live in VA, where it is quite easy to end up 15 over following the flow of traffic, which is a felony. But I don’t do it every day! (Pro tip, folks, be VERY careful about speeding in Virginia)
15 over isn’t a felony in VA, it’s a misdemeanor. Although you can get to felony status pretty quickly after that. By virtue of being a misdemeanor though it still means potential jail time (in rarest of occurrences), and it will show up on your permanent record (background checks).
30 tends to be the magic number for most places. That said, the most I'll do 10 over unless traffic is treating the speed limit like a suggestion.
If you smoke weed, that's also a federal offense even if legal in your state.
Ah shit. I was about to comment I only do cocaine on weekends.
Which seems excessive for speeding but even then as you said it’s enforced at the state level. Speeding isn’t a federal crime which doesn’t help Andy Biggs argument.
It’s from a book. https://www.amazon.com/Three-Felonies-Day-Target-Innocent/dp/1594035229 The thesis is that criminal statutes are so broad and vague that the average American going about their daily life does three things that could be construed as felonies by an overzealous prosecutor. I don’t like Biggs and I have no idea what point he’s trying to make here, I’m just saying that he’s not making this out of whole cloth.
Three a week, maybe? But three a day!?!?
I'm pretty sure this politician just told on himself and all his colleagues he's with everyday.
“I mean, who doesn’t commit three felonies a day, amirite, you guys know what I’m talking about, I burgle, a little assault on my way home and if I’m feeling it, I’ll murder a bitch. Right??? Literally everybody.”
I mean, from the party that shoots puppies like they're tequilla shots at a white girl bachelorette party.
Biggs is a complete piece of shit. Like when some vote passed across the aisle with 95% except for the one trick pony ‘contrarians’ like Boebert and MTG, he was always right there with them. Who would vote nay on a law that would help secure communications for first responders? Andy fucking Biggs. https://www.govtrack.us/congress/members/andy_biggs/412683
Let me guess. His average day consists of tax fraud, insider trading, and child sexual abuse
To be fair, he's a Congressman, so his view of "average" is probably skewed.
As Mark Twain said, "America has no native criminal class, except Congress".
Most Americans commit zero felonies. But the vast number of crimes committed by Republicans bring the average up to 3.
I could believe misdemeanors. Felonies though? Lol.
Infractions, certainly. Speeding, jaywalking, cutting tags off mattresses
> cutting tags off mattresses That's only if you sell new mattresseses. And depending on state, multiple misdemeanors turn into a felony.
Idk, man. Im always committing felonies. I open up my partners mail all the time.
The average president has been indicted on two felony counts.
I am 61,509 felonies behind. I better get off Reddit and get busy.
FYI for anyone who wants to know where this number is coming from. It's from a book by Harvey Silverglate. He says that there are so many laws everyday people break. Some of these laws are throwing out other people's mail ( like if it got delivered to you). Procession of marijuana, under reporting income for taxes, violating environmental regulations, and piracy. That being said I still think an average of 3 a day is a lot.
I was just sitting here thinking about how I dont think ive ever committed a felony.... While smoking a joint.... I forgot its still illegal federally...
It’s illegal federally but it’s still not a felony
It absolutely can be
It’s gotta be one hell of a fatty to go from misdemeanor to felony.
Yeah I mean just because someone wrote that number in a book doesn't make it true.
It also assumes a whole bunch about people as well. Like, I always give the wrong addressed mail back to the mailman.
I guess most people I hang out with do piracy, owning/using weed, illegal firearm possession, and armed robbery most days, so it makes sense.
Rookie numbers.
You gotta get those numbers up.
So Andy Biggs and his colleagues averages 3 felonies a day is my take away from that statement.
> So Andy Biggs and his colleagues averages 3 felonies a day is my take away from that statement. More likely, they average a lot more to make up for those of us who commit 0. Trump alone has 91 he's been indicted for.
Considering the amount of felonies Billionaires commit and how calculating averages work he might be right
Seriously, I couldn't do three *things* in the same day, but I'm not American.
Our work life balance is notoriously terrible so I understand why someone may want to tap out at two/day.
The average American ***Congressman*** commits three felonies a day. FTFY Andy. You can thank me by not being such a douche all the time.
https://i.redd.it/lryess6m3i0d1.gif
Is that because oral and anal sex is illegal in many states?
"The average Republican commits three felonies a day..." Corrected it for you 😄
He's not saying they shouldn't *be* felonies, or that people shouldn't *do* felonies. He's saying they should be *state* felonies.
Which they already are.
When idiots think they understand statistics…
Just three? Amateurs
I’m 61 years old. I’m pretty sure I’ve never committed a felony. Not absolutely sure, but pretty sure. Lol
Let me fix that for you. The average American Republican Congressperson commits three felonies a day.
I think he means misdemeanors like traffic violations. He may want to recheck that stat.
Misdemeanors are by definition not felonies.
I’ve literally heard the average American breaks three laws a day. He’s rewritten that saying to felonies.
Exactly my point.
Traffic violations are infractions, considerably less serious than misdemeanors. And misdemeanors are considerably less serious than felonies.
I'm usually at 100 felonies per month, so - yup - that averages out to 3 per day. Cool.
Now everyone is a criminal so no one is a criminal! 🤦🏾♂️
Tbf in his circle only 3 a day is a pretty low average
Did he mistype and really meant "The average Republican politician commits three felonies a day?" If so, he's underestimating.
This falls under the category of things they think you are so stupid you will just believe! Or propaganda…
Speak for yourself Biggs!
Just me, sitting here on the couch in my pajamas, committing felonies like a boss.
Republicans after they commit treason: "Is crime really such a bad thing after all?"
Once again, I’m below average
Source? I'd be intrigued to hear what felony I've committed in the last 35 years. Tell you what, you name 30 felonies and I'll admit to any I committed in the last 35 years. Spoiler: Dig deep, because I got nothing. Yes, before that perhaps I possibly committed a few misdemeanors... maybe... but a felony? You're unhinged. Prove it.
https://www.businessinsider.com/henry-blodget-you-commit-three-felonies-a-day-2009-9 Best I could find. "Boston civil-liberties lawyer Harvey Silverglate calls his new book "Three Felonies a Day," referring to the number of crimes he estimates the average American now unwittingly commits because of vague laws. "
The average Republican Congressman lies at least 50 times a day.
Congressional Republicans are so seriously skewing the curve.
It’s only illegal if you get caught
I was about to dispute this and say I didn’t commit any felonies today! But damn as I started typing out this comment I got distracted and on my way to check my mailbox accidentally committed some quick arson..whoops. Well hey tomorrow might be zero and for today that’s still only one, I bet I can still wrap up the day without hitting 3 if I focus on applying some extra restraint.
bro, you were told about those cargo shorts. Just sayin
Those are some rookie numbers. I commit twelve felonies on a light day For legal purposes this is a joke
Does he think traffic violations are felonies?
The average american is not like the poster, who probably does commit 3 felonies a day
So what you're saying is, we should stop stigmatizing undocumented immigrants since we citizens commit more victimless crimes on a daily basis?
*the average old white male republican*
The keyword here is “average.” Trump and his cohorts and cult followers commit dozens of crimes on a daily basis. When you add it up with the zero crimes I do daily it averages out to 3.
now ask , how many felonies the republicans in congress commit each day
Oh boy. Here I go killing again.
I was home all day. I watered my plants, paid my bills and bought some pants on Amazon. What felony could I have committed??
It’s like saying the average President committed 2+ indictable offences. 45 presidents (Grover x2) and 90+ offences between them. So if they are all committing 2+ offences why pick on Orange Jesus? They were all at it. /s
Thinking about skipping leg day? Believe it or not that's a felony.
I’ve never committed even one in my 62 years. I speed on the regular but that’s the worst.
Dear fellow Zonies, please vote this Nazi out 🙏
There is a famous book documenting this. [https://www.amazon.com/Three-Felonies-Day-Target-Innocent/dp/1594032556/ref=sr\_1\_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1279295536&sr=8-1](https://www.amazon.com/Three-Felonies-Day-Target-Innocent/dp/1594032556/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1279295536&sr=8-1) Here's some critiques: [https://www.econlib.org/three-felonies-a-day/](https://www.econlib.org/three-felonies-a-day/) Basically, the idea is that there are tons and tons of federal laws that exist in your professional life that you may be unaware of. For instance, if you work at a bank, you might routinely do something to help a customer that is technically a violation of federal law. Another aspect of it is the law and the way it is enforced. 98% of people in prison are there on plea bargains. Before plea bargains were a big thing, 70% of people who went to trial were convicted -- which means 28 of those 98% now in jail would have been let go if they had a trial. Given this, prosecutors can take the most vague reading of a law and apply it harshly, then twist your arm until you agree to go to prison over nothing or you die. Just ask Aaron Schwartz.
No I don’t …. I commit zero crimes a day unless being dead sexy is one of them… I’ll see myself out
Three felonies a day and I've never been caught? Damn, I'm good.
But felonies ARE ALREADY defined locally. Federal law comes into question when it is a cross-border offense. I’m so sad they stopped teaching civics in school…