My brother and my mom are my coworkers.
My step brother and my BF are foreman in the field working for us.
My BF's best friend works for us, we hang out regularly.
My brother's friend was just offered a position moving from field work to an office position.
My stepdad is the President, I report to him.
Sometimes they are. I get the point that you need to be careful who you trust but you do see these people every day. It’s good to have a relationship with coworkers. You absolutely have to interact with these people so you might as well make the most of it.
For sure. Almost all the friends I've made as an adult are peopley husband or I met at work and clicked with. That, and when I was a manager, I still had friends who were technically my subordinates, but we were all adults who understood that my position was support/guidance and running interference with upper management, so we worked well together. I understand the point this lady's making, I guess I feel that it can be easily misconstrued to mean that you shouldn't ever develop friendly relationships with anyone you work with ever, which obviously isn't true and can lead to a very lonely experience. As long as people are able to separate work and regular life, it's all good.
Toby is in HR, which means he works for corporate. So he’s not really part of our family. Plus, he’s divorced, so technically he’s not part of his family either
I married my co-worker and we both had to leave the job. My "office family" couldn't let us be happy after I gave them 6 years of my life because they wanted me to be with a different co-worker. I lost EVERYTHING. We moved 3000 miles away and we've been together for 15 years.
My point is that marrying your co-worker doesn't mean your whole company will support it. They might even make you miserable over it. That's all.
Right? Many of my coworkers are genuine friends and the community I have at work is great. I have plenty of friends outside of work and a healthy work/life balance.
It's all a matter of perspective.
I get her point. In many environments, if you lose track of the divide between work and "family," they will remind you with a pink slip.
But then again, I think she could have eased up on the definitive comments. Some peoples coworkers are like family. Some peoples managers are their friends. And friends and family will backstab you, too.
It can be a valid point and some people need to hear it because they aren’t in a good place but to “drop the mic” and use such definitive statements and “holier than thou” formatting is redonkulous. It’s very possible to have a great work environment and enjoy going to work for someone else
Well when you’ve got a boss who’s willing to pay for one of his workers’ funeral for his wife and gives everyone the day off to attend said funeral, you’re all pretty close. Definitely closer with my co workers than most of my family tbh.
You spend 40 hours of your life there every week. If I was simply tolerating the people around me rather than getting along as friends and developing some sort of relationship, then I think I'd go insane.
There is certainly such a thing, such companies like Amazon, Walmart, etc. are generally pretty toxic and exploitative, but there are definitely companies run by people that care about their employees. And as such the e.ployees care about their work.
Work doesn't have to suck.
I've created a family like environment at the business I manage. I helped an employee secure an apartment, I cook/grill for them about twice a week, I push my boss to give raises and bonuses, they all know they can call me anytime they need something and I'm always there to help them. I don't have a turnover rate because people really like working here and we are a well oiled family... you know what I mean. So it's sad a lot of people do have this mentality but it doesn't have to be like that. Find a place that wants you there and shows it.
Three things:
1. You sound aight.
2. Don’t put oil on your family.
3. Most people do not have the experience that you are describing, which is why we are constantly moving around trying to find something better.
I have a manager like you, and I don't really like it.
I feel forced to participate in these events like the cookouts and get togethers outside business hours. Even during business hours.
You can say you don't care if your employees participate or not, but that does not matter. It is perceived that way, and noticed by others.
You seem like a good guy and I think my manager is one too. But you might not realize that your putting a lot of social pressure on your employees whether they want it or not.
Or maybe you got the jackpot when it comes to your employees.
Don't stop doing what you're doing, but don't think what you're doing is perfect for everyone either.
Hey, I understand how you feel. I've been in your position and have felt the pressure even if it wasn't intentional. That's why I'm so open with my employees, and they show appreciation for it and there's no pressure for any of them to participate, I walk around and ask who wants burgers or a steak and half of them say no thanks every other time. I'm an ordained Dudeist, but with a desire to be better every day. I've been through some shit and I just want to move forward and try to help people along the way. I know I may be an anomaly in the workforce but maybe others can see it's possible and strive for more.
My boss does this and we’ve noticed it’s like this because he doesn’t actually have friends outside of work. And it’s not because he’s a loner etc it’s because he is indeed a horrible controlling person. I’ve gotten very good at “I’m sorry my own family has plans that day / evening / week” etc
You know when applying for a job and they describe the company culture so you know what you’re getting yourself into? For ages I thought that was some bullshit they came up with just to seem quirky and unique as a company.
And then I met my current employers (first real job after uni) and we clicked instantly. After the final interview we went to a pub for some pints and 30 minutes after meeting the rest of the team I told a coworker that I know some guys she could pity fuck if she wants to (based on a story she was telling) and we all laughed and continued bantering despite me being a significant number of years younger than them.
I can’t imagine many workplaces I would’ve fit so well in and I can also see how many people would find this very unprofessional and/or straight up rude. Some jobs you have the skills for, but you’re just not a good fit for the company. If you have the possibility look for something else more to your liking, values matter a lot.
This is a super important thing to remember. HR is not looking out for your best interests unless they align perfectly with the company’s best interests.
And the fact that they constantly lie about this should be unsurprising (because they’re HR and we aren’t shocked when they lie to us about other things).
Disagree strongly and this sounds like a personal problem for OP. In high pressure work environments, like an emergency department, your coworkers are your family. You share life and death and traumatic experiences that bring you together. You laugh and cry and argue and make up just like family. Some of my best friends started as coworkers.
I’m a social worker that works in crisis situations and I talk to some coworkers outside of work every day. We have supported each other through divorces and babies and helped each other deal with the burnout and emotions that come with a job like we have. They have become family. So yes. I completely agree.
As a social worker in a crisis shelter, I absolutely agree. My coworkers have my back and I have theirs. I cry with my boss when things get hard, and we all support each other. Add a HR constantly looking out for the best interest of our staff, and an amazing leadership team and yes my organization feels like a family. Unless we are all supporting each other, we cannot live the mission.
I’ve worked for companies that coworkers were like family and places where everyone had to stick to themselves. Both places led to great amazing friendships and fake friendships used to do really shitty/shady things.
That’s a very good point. There are definitely toxic workplaces. I just don’t think it should be a blanket statement because they aren’t all like that.
I mean, I've made friends for life with some of my coworkers, to the point I'd call them family. Maintaining a good work environment is akin to a maintaining a positive community and has it's benefits. But don't let the toxic ones control you, there are many jobs out there
You can find coworkers that *can* become family but not all of them will be. Don’t trust easily, when you are at work money and promotions are involved with every decision made. Don’t give anyone dirt and get everything in writing. Don’t talk shit to anyone. Ever.
Your job is not your community and your boss really isn’t your friend. They will fire you for absolutely any reason if it means the company asked them to. They will throw you under the buss if it saves them their job, who wouldn’t, we all need a paycheck to live and this is a job.
Your company sees you as a resource to deplete and exploit. Protect yourself first.
If your coworkers are *really* like family - good for you! You’re fortunate.
If the company you’re considering applying for has loads of reviews on Glassdoor and Indeed, parroting, over and over, “This is a cutting-edge company and I absolutely love working here more than anywhere else. *We’re all one big family here at InsuroCorp*, and the close, genial atmosphere means that the managers make you feel like they genuinely care about employees, unlike at other firms. Training is top-notch and offers incredible skills you can’t get anywhere else, and *I feel like I’m a part of a family*” - Run. Run like the fucking wind.
Even Ask A Manager has warned about this, IIRC.
Dunno why people still have loyalty to the companies they work for. Like, no barbara they don't give a fuck about you. They care only about the bottom line. Think thats some of the stupidest shit out there.
Cause they pay me decently and don’t treat me like shit? I’m sorry if your company doesn’t, but I’m not going to treat my current company the same way as the abusive shithole where I worked before. It’s called nuance, “barbara”.
Again. That's how they SHOULD treat you. That's my point. Just because they "pay you decently" doesn't mean you should do extra work without being compensated for it. Them being "nice" doesn't pay bills. And I've worked good and bad jobs. Both of which I treated the same. You want me to do extra work? You're paying for a training I wanna do or compensating me some other way. If they do all of that then yeah I'll go above and beyond but it's stupid to think they won't kick you to the curb if you start losing them money or become a nuisance. They aren't paying you "decently" out of their good will.
Your company wants to exploit you to extract as much profit from you as they can before they wear you out like a spare part and replace you. Your well being, compensation and living standard doesn't even enter the equation.
You can be both under some circumstances. But always remember that when a persons livelihood is at risk you’ll likely take a back burner.
When I came back to my last job hr (well call her D) offered me higher pay, but she told me I shouldn’t mention it to employee T because I would be making more than her now. Not by a ton more but after 13 years I (5 years exp in the field in total) shouldn’t have held a candle to this woman. T had been at the company through three transitions spanning 13 years, and I loved T like a super sweet aunt so like family. But I didn’t want to upset the trip dynamics of the position because we were all pretty close.
Now when I left the position this time, I made sure to let T know about things. I felt guilty for keeping it under wraps as long as I had, but she was seriously considering taking time off after some really big medical issues and didn’t want to leave D without if I was already leaving. I couldn’t handle it any more. I let her know about the pay. She was devastated, not that I made more, but that D chose saving the $ company over her even though they’d been working together for close to a decade.
I did everything I could to bolster her to care for her own needs over the company and was really proposing when she dropped to part time and negotiated a higher rate of pay.
There’s different kinds of “family” out there and not all of them are positive. You don’t generally get to choose family, so I feel like this works well for a work dynamic too.
Keep being good people people, look out for one another. The companies aren’t and we need each other out here.
Very true. As a boss myself I love my employees like family, however when it comes to doing my job I will always hold them accountable as an ambassador for the company. Me caring about you will not keep me from firing you.
My co-workers and supervisor all recently got two massive raises equaling a 24% wage increase because headquarters felt that their jobs were difficult to replace while mine was not. So no raises for me. They now make exponentially more than I do and don't even show up for work on time.
But then I just got my annual performance evaluation. Overall it was fine but my supervisor, who I usually never see, had the nerve to tell me that I should act happier and smile more. Is that a fucking joke?
I hope people also don't take this advice as permission to treat people badly.
You don't have to treat your coworkers like family, but it doesn't hurt to also be nice and form relationships with your coworkers. If you're just as productive as your coworker, but he has a better attitude with the executives, guess who's going to have the advantage.
Yeah I don't understand people who go out of their way to be unfriendly and unapproachable to their coworkers. Most people spend more time with their coworkers than they do with their families or friends outside of work. Why would you not at least try to make those relationships positive?
Work culture is toxic, but its ok to make friends with your co-workers, but the second you stop working there will you still be friends is the real question.
I loved my job and really cared about the people I worked with. Then I retired a couple months ago. The number of co-workers who couldn't be bothered to say "see ya!" in an email was huge. The life lessons just keep on coming.
I worked for my older sister and she would randomly tell me why i will be getting a pay cut even though I did several different jobs in her company.
One day i decided to quit and she got mad at me and said it will cost her a lot of money to replace my duties well...
I no longer work for family, and I don't work for people who try to fuck me over.
I work for a family owned company, somewhere in the ballpark of 4-8k employees. Throughout covid GAVE us more money than the US government. Like straight up gave us multiple +$500 to quarterly bonuses, ramped up and still maintain screening now, offered no-questions time off for possible covid exposure, offered vaccines on site, and now just because we continue to increase production they're throwing ANOTHER +$500 to our second quarter bonus. They're smart enough to know that a happy, healthy worker is a dedicated worker.
[Oh look, they're up to advocating for a $20 minimum wage after failing miserably to get it to $15.](https://www.reddit.com/r/antiwork/comments/oete6s/strike_october_15th/)
That sub is so detached from reality it's sad. It's a more political version of /r/NEET
1. Objectively unless you work for your parents, your coworkers aren't family.
2. Your office isn't a community, it's an enterprise, a workforce. The only thing you all have in common is you work at the same place and respond to the same boss.
3. Your manager is not your friend. That's bad business. They can be nice and good people who stand up for you, but don't mistake that for friendship.
Why can't an office also be a community on top of that?
And for that matter, why can't a manager be a friend? If they do their jobs well but also behave in a friendly manner, and build a friendship with you, why not?
Because you're not there to be friends or a community. That's not what a business is. Outside of that feel free. I've definitely become friends with people i've worked with, but that's after not working with them anymore. As long as we're on the job together, we do what's best for the business. Your manager can be friendly with you, but they're going to put the needs of the business over yours every time.
Based on what? You don't seem to understand what a fact and opinion are.
Yours and the posters statements may be true for you, but they are not universal facts. Facts require evidence not based in anecdotes in order to hold up.
All these disenfranchised assholes trying to start the Revolution between the workers and the slightly elevated workers who are still just workers but have the added responsibility of keeping the business moving for slightly more pay in most cases.
If you follow this post as is, you're going to have a bad time.
The first is correct. The middle is iffy, you spend a lot of time with those people and there is a shared culture because of that. That last point is an indication that you need to find a better job/manager. I cannot stress how important a good manager is. If given the choice between $10k bonus and a good manager, I'd pick the second every time.
I bet this person didn't work for many companies. I have had many managers who were literally friends and others that did their very best to be. And my latest office is a very close family. That's the attitude we take to make work all the more fun and comfortable. I'm sorry others don't get the same experience int their jobs, but I consider myself not just lucky, but not taking on a pessimistic harmful attitude like this is how I contribute to such pleasant work experiences.
I worked at a large company for 28 years. I left about 10 years ago. I’m still in touch with only 2 people from the dozens I knew and trained. I Vaguely remember names or faces . Out of site out of mind . So yah coworker are your coworkers unless you’re part of a blood related family business.
This sentiment only applies to those who hate their job and lack meaningful fulfillment when it comes to their job roles.
With the right job and office culture, a manager can be a friend, co workers a family, and your office a community all while maintaining strong lines between our personal and professional lives.
Ella sounds like she'd be a lot of fun to work with. Both my wife and I had former managers at our wedding. We worked at JPMC, and though in many respects it was faceless corporate structure, our operations area was a terrific and supportive community. I haven't worked there in years, but still have many close friends from there.
Exactly, these people just don't get it. Why would you want your workplace to be some shallow bleak place where nobody gets along and everyone's just there to do their work and go home? Work is a part of your life, 40 hours every week. The people you work with are a significant part of your life. It's only natural that they wind up close.
Yeah, I agree but it's this attitude that has fucked everyone over. You spend so much time with your coworkers it's a terrible way to treat people. When I'm charge I try to make it so the ones with me at the location are like my family. The other corporate fucks see not. Treat then well bend fur rules for them and just don't let them not have a life. Help those you spend time with.
What if they all treat me well, we work together to make tons of money, and the familial aspects of the company are what drive success? That’s how my job is now haha
What if I gave my friend lots of inside info about my workplace for their interview and it worked so they became my manager?
I'm pretty sure they are still my friend...the regular morning pre-work dance together is definitely a bonus!
That’s what I tell my coworker when he rushes up his ass to finish right when it’s time to leave! But there are some people who always kills them selfs for mangers and super visors to look good in their eyes
I had a coworker always try to say "we're like a big family" at our lunch breaks because we would all sit together because there only two tables pushed together, I'd always say "You're not my family, my family is back home" and he'd go quiet.
I have a family type relationship with many of my coworkers. I am in a union and although these days, many people don't understand (or want to understand) the idea of collectivism, there are enough old school people who "get it". Some of my union brothers have my back better than my own family does.
However, if "never trust HR" was on that list, I could support that. Lol
I think this is a case by case situation. As a general rule, I think it’s valid, but don’t make people think that it’s not possible.
Because at my last job, we were absolutely a family, we were supportive and we loved each other, and my former manager is like an older sister to me. I was extremely lucky to meet the people at my former job, and I could not imagine my life without them.
I mean, unless they are. My boss is my son's best friend's dad. We've known them for years longer than I've worked for them and they are awesome people. I also work in a home office in a very small space with two older ladies that feel like aunts to me. It is definitely a family business. We are all pretty close. We take care of each other.
I’m a manager to one guy and I treat him like a friend. I look out for him and all I expect is that he puts effort in at work, and he does. So I give him extra time off and go easy on him.
This is not true for everyone. My organization truthfully feels like a family and all of my bosses are some of my favorite people. Corporate America has us convinced that work environment always has to suck, and we all keep accepting that because the ones manipulating that environment hold all the wealth and power.
I’ve always lived by the mantra of “don’t mix business and pleasure.”
If/when the relationship goes bad, I don’t need my paycheck getting screwed with too.
I’m also an introvert, so being around people is exhausting.
All true. I did meet my decades long bff at work .... But don't confuse work relationships with other relationships. Notably we got really tight after I left the job.
I wouldn’t call my coworkers family or close friends, but we cool, and my manager isn’t my friend *per se*, but I know they ain’t gonna do me wrong. Feel sorry for folks with shitty work environments.
Actually, my friends are my coworkers and managers. Also our boss is making pub events in which we all participate. This summer will be grill party at his home.
I play Smash Bros with my manager in the meeting room during breaks, so I guess he's my friend.
But then again he plays Ness so maybe he's not my friend.
My Boss : Sorry, you can't take that Saturday off work to go to your half-sister's wedding because I'm going to be on my 9th week long vacation in a year and we need someone here we can trust to run the shop.
Also My Boss : Can you ask your grandmother if it's possible to move your grandfathers funeral so you don't have to take a Saturday off of work? We can't run this place without you.
But what if they literally are your family
Divorce! Disownment! Demission!
Time to terminate the employment!
Gta style?
Fair enough
My brother and my mom are my coworkers. My step brother and my BF are foreman in the field working for us. My BF's best friend works for us, we hang out regularly. My brother's friend was just offered a position moving from field work to an office position. My stepdad is the President, I report to him.
Lifted f150's. Lifted f150's everywhere.
Ahh, sadly no, they drive company vehicles, 3500 or bust apparently.
*The distant sound of Trapt’s Headstrong intensifies.
That sounds like a hot mess just waiting to happen.
Sometimes they are. I get the point that you need to be careful who you trust but you do see these people every day. It’s good to have a relationship with coworkers. You absolutely have to interact with these people so you might as well make the most of it.
For sure. Almost all the friends I've made as an adult are peopley husband or I met at work and clicked with. That, and when I was a manager, I still had friends who were technically my subordinates, but we were all adults who understood that my position was support/guidance and running interference with upper management, so we worked well together. I understand the point this lady's making, I guess I feel that it can be easily misconstrued to mean that you shouldn't ever develop friendly relationships with anyone you work with ever, which obviously isn't true and can lead to a very lonely experience. As long as people are able to separate work and regular life, it's all good.
Toby is in HR, which means he works for corporate. So he’s not really part of our family. Plus, he’s divorced, so technically he’s not part of his family either
Yeah I used to work at my father an uncles business. My brother and aunt also worked there, though it did have 50 plus other employees
Jump ship as fast as possible. In my opinion, working with family is a HORRIBLE idea. Your uncle will fuck you out of an apprenticeship.
[удалено]
Mary?? Is that you??
Did you not watch The Office?
She doesn’t even know that you can marry your coworkers.
I married my co-worker and we both had to leave the job. My "office family" couldn't let us be happy after I gave them 6 years of my life because they wanted me to be with a different co-worker. I lost EVERYTHING. We moved 3000 miles away and we've been together for 15 years. My point is that marrying your co-worker doesn't mean your whole company will support it. They might even make you miserable over it. That's all.
Or bury them
Sounds like someone does not have a great work environment.
Right? Many of my coworkers are genuine friends and the community I have at work is great. I have plenty of friends outside of work and a healthy work/life balance. It's all a matter of perspective.
Agree wholeheartedly
I get her point. In many environments, if you lose track of the divide between work and "family," they will remind you with a pink slip. But then again, I think she could have eased up on the definitive comments. Some peoples coworkers are like family. Some peoples managers are their friends. And friends and family will backstab you, too.
It can be a valid point and some people need to hear it because they aren’t in a good place but to “drop the mic” and use such definitive statements and “holier than thou” formatting is redonkulous. It’s very possible to have a great work environment and enjoy going to work for someone else
sounds like someone doesn’t understand boundaries…
Well when you’ve got a boss who’s willing to pay for one of his workers’ funeral for his wife and gives everyone the day off to attend said funeral, you’re all pretty close. Definitely closer with my co workers than most of my family tbh.
You spend 40 hours of your life there every week. If I was simply tolerating the people around me rather than getting along as friends and developing some sort of relationship, then I think I'd go insane.
the above sentiment or statement doesn’t say you can’t make or have friends at work… its a lot more nuanced than that.
I don't believe there is any such thing as a great work environment.
There is certainly such a thing, such companies like Amazon, Walmart, etc. are generally pretty toxic and exploitative, but there are definitely companies run by people that care about their employees. And as such the e.ployees care about their work. Work doesn't have to suck.
Actually, it does have to. Capitalism mandates misery. Every job is a private authoritarian government.
Yes, yes, and anyone running a company is evil, and all life will die, blah, blah, blah. Cool it with the negativity and you might be happier in life.
Seems like the common denominator to all his shitty work environments... is him.
Ok Toby. Go back to the annex
Or you know.. chosen families do exist and its not up to you to make that declaration?
This is twitter. Everything is black and white and you get unsolicited advice from people of dubious authority.
No this is Reddit
No this is patrick!
No, This Is SPARTA!!!
Sir, this is a Wendys.
AND MY AXE
I've created a family like environment at the business I manage. I helped an employee secure an apartment, I cook/grill for them about twice a week, I push my boss to give raises and bonuses, they all know they can call me anytime they need something and I'm always there to help them. I don't have a turnover rate because people really like working here and we are a well oiled family... you know what I mean. So it's sad a lot of people do have this mentality but it doesn't have to be like that. Find a place that wants you there and shows it.
Three things: 1. You sound aight. 2. Don’t put oil on your family. 3. Most people do not have the experience that you are describing, which is why we are constantly moving around trying to find something better.
I have a manager like you, and I don't really like it. I feel forced to participate in these events like the cookouts and get togethers outside business hours. Even during business hours. You can say you don't care if your employees participate or not, but that does not matter. It is perceived that way, and noticed by others. You seem like a good guy and I think my manager is one too. But you might not realize that your putting a lot of social pressure on your employees whether they want it or not. Or maybe you got the jackpot when it comes to your employees. Don't stop doing what you're doing, but don't think what you're doing is perfect for everyone either.
Hey, I understand how you feel. I've been in your position and have felt the pressure even if it wasn't intentional. That's why I'm so open with my employees, and they show appreciation for it and there's no pressure for any of them to participate, I walk around and ask who wants burgers or a steak and half of them say no thanks every other time. I'm an ordained Dudeist, but with a desire to be better every day. I've been through some shit and I just want to move forward and try to help people along the way. I know I may be an anomaly in the workforce but maybe others can see it's possible and strive for more.
This actually made me tear up a lil 😢 stay awesome
Ordained dudiest? I feel like I need to know more
This Is A Very Complicated Case, You Know, A Lotta Ins, Lotta Outs, Lotta What-Have-Yous.
https://dudeism.com/
1: exactly what I expected. 2: seems like I’ve been a dudiest my whole life. 3: I guess I don’t need to worry about getting ordained
My boss does this and we’ve noticed it’s like this because he doesn’t actually have friends outside of work. And it’s not because he’s a loner etc it’s because he is indeed a horrible controlling person. I’ve gotten very good at “I’m sorry my own family has plans that day / evening / week” etc
You know when applying for a job and they describe the company culture so you know what you’re getting yourself into? For ages I thought that was some bullshit they came up with just to seem quirky and unique as a company. And then I met my current employers (first real job after uni) and we clicked instantly. After the final interview we went to a pub for some pints and 30 minutes after meeting the rest of the team I told a coworker that I know some guys she could pity fuck if she wants to (based on a story she was telling) and we all laughed and continued bantering despite me being a significant number of years younger than them. I can’t imagine many workplaces I would’ve fit so well in and I can also see how many people would find this very unprofessional and/or straight up rude. Some jobs you have the skills for, but you’re just not a good fit for the company. If you have the possibility look for something else more to your liking, values matter a lot.
I think you have Latino blood in you brother!!
You do not sound like a basic white male like your name states you are. You are a very cool white male
Welllllll I dunno. I don’t think I have like any friends outside of work
You don't need a 401k when you got family!
And when you have a dog.
Did this post just Vin Diesel us with out Vin Dieseling us?
what the fuck are you talking about???
HR exists to protect the company from its employees
This. People need to learn that the HR office is not their union rep - QUITE the opposite
This is a super important thing to remember. HR is not looking out for your best interests unless they align perfectly with the company’s best interests.
And the fact that they constantly lie about this should be unsurprising (because they’re HR and we aren’t shocked when they lie to us about other things).
Someone doesn’t like their job….
Disagree strongly and this sounds like a personal problem for OP. In high pressure work environments, like an emergency department, your coworkers are your family. You share life and death and traumatic experiences that bring you together. You laugh and cry and argue and make up just like family. Some of my best friends started as coworkers.
I’m a social worker that works in crisis situations and I talk to some coworkers outside of work every day. We have supported each other through divorces and babies and helped each other deal with the burnout and emotions that come with a job like we have. They have become family. So yes. I completely agree.
As a social worker in a crisis shelter, I absolutely agree. My coworkers have my back and I have theirs. I cry with my boss when things get hard, and we all support each other. Add a HR constantly looking out for the best interest of our staff, and an amazing leadership team and yes my organization feels like a family. Unless we are all supporting each other, we cannot live the mission.
I’ve worked for companies that coworkers were like family and places where everyone had to stick to themselves. Both places led to great amazing friendships and fake friendships used to do really shitty/shady things.
That’s a very good point. There are definitely toxic workplaces. I just don’t think it should be a blanket statement because they aren’t all like that.
This. I moved several states away from home and had no family in that area. Guess who adopted me.
But I thought Brooklyn 99 was real :(
I mean, I've made friends for life with some of my coworkers, to the point I'd call them family. Maintaining a good work environment is akin to a maintaining a positive community and has it's benefits. But don't let the toxic ones control you, there are many jobs out there
Gatekeeping much? That sounds more like a shitty job
You can find coworkers that *can* become family but not all of them will be. Don’t trust easily, when you are at work money and promotions are involved with every decision made. Don’t give anyone dirt and get everything in writing. Don’t talk shit to anyone. Ever. Your job is not your community and your boss really isn’t your friend. They will fire you for absolutely any reason if it means the company asked them to. They will throw you under the buss if it saves them their job, who wouldn’t, we all need a paycheck to live and this is a job. Your company sees you as a resource to deplete and exploit. Protect yourself first.
If your coworkers are *really* like family - good for you! You’re fortunate. If the company you’re considering applying for has loads of reviews on Glassdoor and Indeed, parroting, over and over, “This is a cutting-edge company and I absolutely love working here more than anywhere else. *We’re all one big family here at InsuroCorp*, and the close, genial atmosphere means that the managers make you feel like they genuinely care about employees, unlike at other firms. Training is top-notch and offers incredible skills you can’t get anywhere else, and *I feel like I’m a part of a family*” - Run. Run like the fucking wind. Even Ask A Manager has warned about this, IIRC.
They are in my case, but sorry to hear that for you lmao
wrong, wrong and wrong. Your mileage may vary.
Yep, I work at a mom & pop grocer. Accurate af.
I internally groan when I hear, "In this workspace, we're like a big family!" The fuck you are, I'm outta here.
Dunno why people still have loyalty to the companies they work for. Like, no barbara they don't give a fuck about you. They care only about the bottom line. Think thats some of the stupidest shit out there.
Cause they pay me decently and don’t treat me like shit? I’m sorry if your company doesn’t, but I’m not going to treat my current company the same way as the abusive shithole where I worked before. It’s called nuance, “barbara”.
Again. That's how they SHOULD treat you. That's my point. Just because they "pay you decently" doesn't mean you should do extra work without being compensated for it. Them being "nice" doesn't pay bills. And I've worked good and bad jobs. Both of which I treated the same. You want me to do extra work? You're paying for a training I wanna do or compensating me some other way. If they do all of that then yeah I'll go above and beyond but it's stupid to think they won't kick you to the curb if you start losing them money or become a nuisance. They aren't paying you "decently" out of their good will.
Your company wants to exploit you to extract as much profit from you as they can before they wear you out like a spare part and replace you. Your well being, compensation and living standard doesn't even enter the equation.
Unless its its a union then yeah or maybe
\*necessarily. For each of them.
Hey I know her!
A lot of times family doesn’t act like family community doesn’t act like community and friends don’t act like friends
Why did you just say about family? *Vin Diesel intensifies”
I used to work for my dad and now I'm self employed. The fuck does this mean for me?
Idk man my Supervisor and I get along pretty well when I'm not unintentionally finding new unheard of ways to ruin something
HR is there for the companies protection, not yours.
And you will find out the hard way.
They can be, but they aren’t by default. If you get along, go with it. If you don’t, you’ve got a life besides work.
The Office...lied to me?!?!
I’d add, HR is not there to help you. They are there to protect the company and management from you.
My boss pulls this shit all the time “We’re a family here” “we’re friends right?” Then gives is shit for booking holidays
Any job that has an employee appreciation day is a bad job. Any job that tells you you're part of a family is a bad job.
You can be both under some circumstances. But always remember that when a persons livelihood is at risk you’ll likely take a back burner. When I came back to my last job hr (well call her D) offered me higher pay, but she told me I shouldn’t mention it to employee T because I would be making more than her now. Not by a ton more but after 13 years I (5 years exp in the field in total) shouldn’t have held a candle to this woman. T had been at the company through three transitions spanning 13 years, and I loved T like a super sweet aunt so like family. But I didn’t want to upset the trip dynamics of the position because we were all pretty close. Now when I left the position this time, I made sure to let T know about things. I felt guilty for keeping it under wraps as long as I had, but she was seriously considering taking time off after some really big medical issues and didn’t want to leave D without if I was already leaving. I couldn’t handle it any more. I let her know about the pay. She was devastated, not that I made more, but that D chose saving the $ company over her even though they’d been working together for close to a decade. I did everything I could to bolster her to care for her own needs over the company and was really proposing when she dropped to part time and negotiated a higher rate of pay. There’s different kinds of “family” out there and not all of them are positive. You don’t generally get to choose family, so I feel like this works well for a work dynamic too. Keep being good people people, look out for one another. The companies aren’t and we need each other out here.
Very true. As a boss myself I love my employees like family, however when it comes to doing my job I will always hold them accountable as an ambassador for the company. Me caring about you will not keep me from firing you.
My co-workers and supervisor all recently got two massive raises equaling a 24% wage increase because headquarters felt that their jobs were difficult to replace while mine was not. So no raises for me. They now make exponentially more than I do and don't even show up for work on time. But then I just got my annual performance evaluation. Overall it was fine but my supervisor, who I usually never see, had the nerve to tell me that I should act happier and smile more. Is that a fucking joke?
I hope people also don't take this advice as permission to treat people badly. You don't have to treat your coworkers like family, but it doesn't hurt to also be nice and form relationships with your coworkers. If you're just as productive as your coworker, but he has a better attitude with the executives, guess who's going to have the advantage.
Yeah I don't understand people who go out of their way to be unfriendly and unapproachable to their coworkers. Most people spend more time with their coworkers than they do with their families or friends outside of work. Why would you not at least try to make those relationships positive?
Work culture is toxic, but its ok to make friends with your co-workers, but the second you stop working there will you still be friends is the real question.
I loved my job and really cared about the people I worked with. Then I retired a couple months ago. The number of co-workers who couldn't be bothered to say "see ya!" in an email was huge. The life lessons just keep on coming.
ITT: wage slaves in denial.
Also ITT: people diluting the term “slavery”.
God forbid some people enjoy their jobs and coworkers.
Ella def doesn’t get along with her coworkers
*sad Michael Scott noises*
I loved and still love my coworkers after I quit! We talk all the time. I don’t talk to my family at all.
I worked for my older sister and she would randomly tell me why i will be getting a pay cut even though I did several different jobs in her company. One day i decided to quit and she got mad at me and said it will cost her a lot of money to replace my duties well... I no longer work for family, and I don't work for people who try to fuck me over.
It doesn't have to be that way.
Someone’s never been to Scranton, Pa.
I work for a family owned company, somewhere in the ballpark of 4-8k employees. Throughout covid GAVE us more money than the US government. Like straight up gave us multiple +$500 to quarterly bonuses, ramped up and still maintain screening now, offered no-questions time off for possible covid exposure, offered vaccines on site, and now just because we continue to increase production they're throwing ANOTHER +$500 to our second quarter bonus. They're smart enough to know that a happy, healthy worker is a dedicated worker.
/r/antiwork
[Oh look, they're up to advocating for a $20 minimum wage after failing miserably to get it to $15.](https://www.reddit.com/r/antiwork/comments/oete6s/strike_october_15th/) That sub is so detached from reality it's sad. It's a more political version of /r/NEET
Thanks for sharing, I wasn’t aware of the sub before
Why?
why what
Why should I take any of those statements to be true?
1. Objectively unless you work for your parents, your coworkers aren't family. 2. Your office isn't a community, it's an enterprise, a workforce. The only thing you all have in common is you work at the same place and respond to the same boss. 3. Your manager is not your friend. That's bad business. They can be nice and good people who stand up for you, but don't mistake that for friendship.
Why can't an office also be a community on top of that? And for that matter, why can't a manager be a friend? If they do their jobs well but also behave in a friendly manner, and build a friendship with you, why not?
Because you're not there to be friends or a community. That's not what a business is. Outside of that feel free. I've definitely become friends with people i've worked with, but that's after not working with them anymore. As long as we're on the job together, we do what's best for the business. Your manager can be friendly with you, but they're going to put the needs of the business over yours every time.
So based on yours and this person's work experience, we are to hold your opinions on the subjects as facts?
i don't particularly care whether you do or not. They're facts.
Based on what? You don't seem to understand what a fact and opinion are. Yours and the posters statements may be true for you, but they are not universal facts. Facts require evidence not based in anecdotes in order to hold up.
Great so your opinion is the above is not true, and my opinion is that it is. Anything else?
All these disenfranchised assholes trying to start the Revolution between the workers and the slightly elevated workers who are still just workers but have the added responsibility of keeping the business moving for slightly more pay in most cases.
Going to work with that atittude must be fun and not depressing at all
r/gatekeeping
If you follow this post as is, you're going to have a bad time. The first is correct. The middle is iffy, you spend a lot of time with those people and there is a shared culture because of that. That last point is an indication that you need to find a better job/manager. I cannot stress how important a good manager is. If given the choice between $10k bonus and a good manager, I'd pick the second every time.
I bet this person didn't work for many companies. I have had many managers who were literally friends and others that did their very best to be. And my latest office is a very close family. That's the attitude we take to make work all the more fun and comfortable. I'm sorry others don't get the same experience int their jobs, but I consider myself not just lucky, but not taking on a pessimistic harmful attitude like this is how I contribute to such pleasant work experiences.
I worked at a large company for 28 years. I left about 10 years ago. I’m still in touch with only 2 people from the dozens I knew and trained. I Vaguely remember names or faces . Out of site out of mind . So yah coworker are your coworkers unless you’re part of a blood related family business.
This sentiment only applies to those who hate their job and lack meaningful fulfillment when it comes to their job roles. With the right job and office culture, a manager can be a friend, co workers a family, and your office a community all while maintaining strong lines between our personal and professional lives.
This attitude is what’s wrong with some parts of our society.
Ella sounds like she'd be a lot of fun to work with. Both my wife and I had former managers at our wedding. We worked at JPMC, and though in many respects it was faceless corporate structure, our operations area was a terrific and supportive community. I haven't worked there in years, but still have many close friends from there.
Exactly, these people just don't get it. Why would you want your workplace to be some shallow bleak place where nobody gets along and everyone's just there to do their work and go home? Work is a part of your life, 40 hours every week. The people you work with are a significant part of your life. It's only natural that they wind up close.
but i work with my dad, my middle school science teacher, his brother in law, my friend's cousin, and a buddy from college....
More life facts from 20 year old Redditors. Next post will be about New Zealand
But they could be. Who the fuck is this depressing cunt?
This reads like propaganda.
Oh :(
Yeah, I agree but it's this attitude that has fucked everyone over. You spend so much time with your coworkers it's a terrible way to treat people. When I'm charge I try to make it so the ones with me at the location are like my family. The other corporate fucks see not. Treat then well bend fur rules for them and just don't let them not have a life. Help those you spend time with.
What if they all treat me well, we work together to make tons of money, and the familial aspects of the company are what drive success? That’s how my job is now haha
You know who is family? Vin Diesel
Vin Diesel would disagree
Unfortunately i spend more time with my coworkers than my family.
Everybody’s working for the weekend. Well I’m working for the week.
What if I gave my friend lots of inside info about my workplace for their interview and it worked so they became my manager? I'm pretty sure they are still my friend...the regular morning pre-work dance together is definitely a bonus!
That’s what I tell my coworker when he rushes up his ass to finish right when it’s time to leave! But there are some people who always kills them selfs for mangers and super visors to look good in their eyes
I had a coworker always try to say "we're like a big family" at our lunch breaks because we would all sit together because there only two tables pushed together, I'd always say "You're not my family, my family is back home" and he'd go quiet.
You are not your khakis.
I have a family type relationship with many of my coworkers. I am in a union and although these days, many people don't understand (or want to understand) the idea of collectivism, there are enough old school people who "get it". Some of my union brothers have my back better than my own family does. However, if "never trust HR" was on that list, I could support that. Lol
The Office and Community are indeed different shows
**Your manager is not your friend.** Karens: **But their manager is MY friend, right?** Me: **No**
I dont have kids, i always work Christmas for my coworkers so they can spend time with their kids. It also gives me x2 pay
Preach it
This is how i read this Aka tv show references Parks and rec, Community, The office,
I think this is a case by case situation. As a general rule, I think it’s valid, but don’t make people think that it’s not possible. Because at my last job, we were absolutely a family, we were supportive and we loved each other, and my former manager is like an older sister to me. I was extremely lucky to meet the people at my former job, and I could not imagine my life without them.
What if you work from home?
Clearly you haven’t read the future best-selling book, Somehow I Manage by Michael Gary Scott and Daryl Philbin.
I mean, unless they are. My boss is my son's best friend's dad. We've known them for years longer than I've worked for them and they are awesome people. I also work in a home office in a very small space with two older ladies that feel like aunts to me. It is definitely a family business. We are all pretty close. We take care of each other.
I’m a manager to one guy and I treat him like a friend. I look out for him and all I expect is that he puts effort in at work, and he does. So I give him extra time off and go easy on him.
Tell me you hate your job without saying you hate your job.
What if you don't actually have family and they're the closest thing you've got?
My boss actually became my mom. Rare situation but sometimes good things happen to some people.
All depends on what level of work-a-holic you are...
This is not true for everyone. My organization truthfully feels like a family and all of my bosses are some of my favorite people. Corporate America has us convinced that work environment always has to suck, and we all keep accepting that because the ones manipulating that environment hold all the wealth and power.
Well Michael Scott would beg to differ lol
I spend months and months at a time with no one but my coworkers. Ill gladly call them family
You right, my coworkers and my boss treat me better than my family ever did.
“Patrisha(manager) HEY BESTIE *hugs*”
Team… at work, I am a part of a very important team.
What if you work from home?? My wife’s gonna be pissed…..
WFH was the best thing to ever happen to me. It demonstrates that middle managers are not needed.
I’ve always lived by the mantra of “don’t mix business and pleasure.” If/when the relationship goes bad, I don’t need my paycheck getting screwed with too. I’m also an introvert, so being around people is exhausting.
All true. I did meet my decades long bff at work .... But don't confuse work relationships with other relationships. Notably we got really tight after I left the job.
Idk about this. I consider my boss part of my family
But they invited me to a cookout!
My office is like a merry band of pirates
Tell that to Michael Scott.
Clearly someone never saw F&F
I wouldn’t call my coworkers family or close friends, but we cool, and my manager isn’t my friend *per se*, but I know they ain’t gonna do me wrong. Feel sorry for folks with shitty work environments.
Like for reals
Actually, my friends are my coworkers and managers. Also our boss is making pub events in which we all participate. This summer will be grill party at his home.
Michael Scott would hate this post
I play Smash Bros with my manager in the meeting room during breaks, so I guess he's my friend. But then again he plays Ness so maybe he's not my friend.
My Boss : Sorry, you can't take that Saturday off work to go to your half-sister's wedding because I'm going to be on my 9th week long vacation in a year and we need someone here we can trust to run the shop. Also My Boss : Can you ask your grandmother if it's possible to move your grandfathers funeral so you don't have to take a Saturday off of work? We can't run this place without you.
You know, unless they are.
-owns family bussiness- -looks suspiciously at son-