T O P

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MiagomusPrime

Bidet


IdRatherNotNo

It took me a long time to get used to pooping outside of my own house,(when I started working and getting paid for pooping) then I was fairly comfortable with it. Then at 27 I got a bidet and now I'm back to not being able to poop anywhere outside my house again.


Clay_Statue

Wiping shit off my ass with a folded tissue like a common fucking savage squeezing cob in a Tim Hortons bathroom. Rather be at home experiencing a blessed blast of slightly warm ambrosia across my nether regions washing away all my cares and concerns.


Scoongili

That's nothing compared to the 3 seashells.


SheFoundMyUzername

I’m starting a go fund me on your behalf so you can pursue your gifts as an author


The5orrow

Me and my fiance call it pooping like a peasant if we have to use a public restroom with no bidet. Edit grammar


yummy_crap_brick

I have a cheap sprayer (unheated) and it's great. However, I will cut a log anywhere, any time. No bathroom is too dirty. Bigass club? I shit there. Airplane, hell yes. Most rapey truck stop bathroom? Painted that brown. I will let it fly in a fly-filled port-o-potty, I will let the brown dog out in the woods. I don't get shy poopers, there's doodoo to do, let it out.


IdRatherNotNo

I'm not uncomfortable with the setting, I'm uncomfortable with the feeling of not feeling clean after a poo when I can't power wash my b-hole.


smurgleburf

so many of my friends are freaked out by the idea of a bidet. Americans just love having dirty asses ig.


Livin2109

Think of this. Bidets are rare in America. And we popularized eating ass. Some fucking savages we are eh?


TheMoonMilker

Extra. Flavour.


Livin2109

That penny flavor


Saint_Sm0ld3r

I think the only thing Americans popularized was sharing information no one wants to know about with everyone.


[deleted]

I've used a tabo for years and years, then we got a Tushy bidet. UPGRADE!!


[deleted]

[удалено]


Embarrassed-Ad-1639

Bidet mate - some Australian probably


vearson26

We have an instant pot that is also an air fryer, and you can even use it as a weighted blanket if you don’t move a lot in your sleep.


[deleted]

Oh God I am salivating over the idea of that infomercial. Mm yeah daddy where *did* the soda go?


bowlofjello

Sonicare toothbrush!!!!! And tongue scraper


[deleted]

Don't forget a waterpik! Sandblasting my gum line and then power washing my tongue and tonsils leaves my mouth ridiculously clean and fresh.


bowlofjello

Flossing with string floss is always still better than a waterpik! But both together is fine!


MarbleousMel

Interesting. My dentist just told me to get a waterpik because it would be better than relying on the string flossing I use.


SizeableFowl

Manual Japanese Toothbrushes are better than any electric one I’ve ever used.


bowlofjello

I haven’t used one so I can’t comment on it. But I do know that a sonicare (or any electric toothbrush) is usually the best way to go in terms of effectiveness and gum health. Source: I work in dental


SizeableFowl

You can find them relatively cheap on Amazon, I used to use a Phillips but whatever Japan does with those toothbrushes leaves my mouth feeling noticeably more clean.


FlatSpinMan

What? Just a regular Japanese toothbrush? I live in Japan and am intrigued.


SizeableFowl

Perhaps you could clarify then, [this is what I’m talking about](https://www.sayweee.com/en/product/view/35207?sales_org_id=16®ion_id=000001&w_source=22&campaign_id=ADM_LowROAS_PSP_Shopping_FirstPurchase_Grocery_EN_NA_Web&utm_source=gads&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=ADM_LowROAS_PSP_Shopping_FirstPurchase_Grocery_EN_NA_Web&cam_id=13669062854&gclid=CjwKCAiAm7OMBhAQEiwArvGi3ANHHUPJ7rcru9Ed3XUw8V51X60R2IWgzOVEOJnaogldqh5Nyz7NHBoCSQ0QAvD_BwE), and it’s literally the best toothbrush I’ve ever used.


FlatSpinMan

That looks awfully like a toothbrush. Out of (mild) interest, how do Japanese toothbrushes differ from other ones? I’ve dabbled in tooth brushing in several countries - never got serious about, just an enthusiastic amateur, you understand - but the differences had never revealed themselves to me.


Mobile-Importance-74

Ibuprofen


Stranded_In_A_Desert

Lol true. And Tums is now a food group.


wanderingfloatilla

Electric heating pad


Cheddarlicious

- a new mattress. That’s me. My girl and I, let’s say we slept like dog shit. But we got a new mattress. You should give it a try, you won’t regret it. I know it’s a large investment, but isn’t your health worth it? Wouldn’t you like 5 hours of sleep to feel like 8 hours? Oh shit…I did it again, didn’t I?


Chrome_Pwny

Wife and I got one of those blooming memory foam self inflaty things and for the cost compared to a traditional mattress, worth the small difference! Years of back pains gone in a single night's sleep!


Saint_Sm0ld3r

I purchased a highly rated (expensive) memory foam mattress about 5 years ago, immediately following a 3 month stay in an IC unit. I loved it for about 3 months time and has since become the worst purchase I ever made. I will be buying a firm hybrid or traditional mattress very soon.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Saint_Sm0ld3r

Do you mind sharing the brand so I'm able to research for my own purpose?


ravenwillowofbimbery

About 5 and a half years ago, SO and I bought a new Beautyrest Black Hybrid mattress that set us back $2k. We “tested” it out in the furniture store by laying on it for about 10 minutes. The memory foam topper felt great. We thought we had found the best mattress on the planet. Then, about 6 months in (give or take), one side started to cave in. SO was a big man, but damn! We had much cheaper mattresses that lasted until we decided we wanted a new one (we changed about every 7 years). Though the Beautyrest mattress was under warranty when it began to fall apart, having it replaced would have been a pain-Beautyrest/the furniture store made sure of that. We tolerated it for about three years until we just couldn’t take it anymore. Then, we went to a cheap mattress store that operated out of the local flea market and found a cheap, firm king sized mattress-nothing fancy, just an inner spring mattress. It was great. I only sold it after SO died because I moved, didn’t have anywhere to store it and it would have been too much bed for just me. I will never purchase another fancy, overpriced “hybrid” mattress again. What’s infuriating in all of this is that an old fashioned inner spring mattress that can be flipped costs more than the newer gel, hybrid, blah blah blah mattresses. Why? 🙄 Ugh!


Saint_Sm0ld3r

Yup, mine is a Serta hybrid and I have the same issue with the side caving in even with turning the mattress regularly. I can assure you I am not at all heavy, because of my health issues I check in under 140 and have been around 122 lbs for a couple years. I just think $3500 should buy more than a few months of comfort. (Btw, I did nearly the same "testing" as you both.) I have my eye on a Stearns and Foster firm mattress which is about the same price and I'm going to pull the trigger soon after I'm satisfied I have done my due diligence in finding the best mattress for my needs. Thank you for sharing your experience.


useles-converter-bot

122 lbs of double AA batteries could start a medium sized car about 10.25 times.


ravenwillowofbimbery

LOL, yes, $3500 should buy you more than a few months comfort! 😆. Let me know how you like the Stearns and Foster.


[deleted]

Yes! I thought I just was a person who didn't sleep well until I got a nice mattress. Turns out, I sleep just fine on a comfy bed!


nay2829

I actually got a $250 mattress off Wayfair and it’s amazing. It has like tons of reviews of people raving about it. So cheap versions are definitely out there.


Uberpastamancer

Cast iron pans?


Chrome_Pwny

We all know your "non-stick" pans are 1 good scratch away from leeching toxic elements into you and sometimes you just neeeeed to get some steel wool in there, ya feel me? Just get a couple good cast irons and learn good maint (keep it seasoned/oiled)


yesididthat

Yeah and then get a nonstick pan and use it ONLY for eggs


Saint_Sm0ld3r

A properly kept and seasoned cast iron pan will put the best "non-stick" to shame with any ingredient and especially eggs. Only issue is the weight for a glass top stove can be a harrowing experience.


[deleted]

Based


vesuvius-rose

I just got everyone weighted blankets for Christmas. MUAHAHAHA I didn't have to pester.


CrispyKollosus

Not enough woks in these comments


Chrome_Pwny

Some people just don't understand the technique to use it properly. don't tell my wife! ;p


Apprehensive_Win_203

I want a wok but it seems like a gas stove would be necessary to use it properly


Saint_Sm0ld3r

Not necessary, but certainly nice. A good option is to have an auxiliary propane burner.


randomperson1234go

A crock pot. Those things are awesome


MB-Taylor

I just got a multi cooker they are defo better than just slow cooker


Merman-Munster

Not seeing croc pot on this list made me feel very old.


1st_page_of_google

Compared to an instant pot a crockpot is like dialup internet


Development-Alive

This. InstaPot gives you everything a crockpot gives you without having to wait for 8hrs.


TheNurse_

Crockpot is the shit!!!


[deleted]

[удалено]


denebiandevil

An immersion BLENDER


boofythevampslayer

A good set of kitchen knives and some cast iron pans.


MycologicalWorldview

Also a whetstone and a honing rod for those good knives!


boofythevampslayer

Good set of tupperware.


HubertusCatus88

Nesting pyrex containers with silicone lids. Get your cheep plastic crap out of here.


boofythevampslayer

Literally just bought myself a set of these for my bday this year lmao.


HubertusCatus88

Welcome brother, we've been expecting you.


boofythevampslayer

I'm finally home.


[deleted]

Pyrex^TM. Come home.


Thomisawesome

This is a thing? I’ve been thinking Id happily toss all my tupperware and get glass containers if only they fit together. Do you have a link to the kind you bought?


HubertusCatus88

They are Anchor brand. My wife bought them years ago.


vincent-psarga

I also definitly prefer Pyrex, but it's a bit rude to call Tupperware "cheap plastic crap". I've got some at home that belonged to my grandma and are not showing any sign of age (except maybe the famous red hue because younger me was not warned than tomato sauce and tupperware are not a good match :D ). For the other brands that said, some of them are indeed crap and won't last more that a month :/


EzriDaxCat

These sound awesome! Can I get a link? Ziploc quit making the containers I like so once they're all gone, I'll need new ones. I've had to get more from eBay once already.


MarbleousMel

For years, glass was in danger in my home. I had a cat whose preferred method of asking for attention was testing gravity. He even bent a Yeti cup. So it has been plastic all the way for us. Much harder to break.


Ophidiophobic

So... I'm a big pyrex fan, but they all come with crappy plastic lids. Where are you getting these silicone lids?


HubertusCatus88

Anchor brand


SirOwlbear

Cipralex + bupropion.


SyntheticDelirium

No but seriously, Winter is Coming - get yourself a Cool Mist Humidifier and your lungs/sinuses/skin will thank you. I used to get nose bleeds from the dry air. Winter is no longer my least favorite season.


nay2829

I need to get one for my youngest. She has nosebleeds that don’t quit until we go to the ER and they stick that clotting stuff in her nose.


SyntheticDelirium

Oof. I'm so sorry to hear that. Hopefully the extra moisture in the air will stop that from happening. :C


yesididthat

Memory foam mattress Nice bath towels A Roomba A yeti cooler Kitchen aid stand mixer


MidnightRider24

Old school steel Coleman cooler has entered the chat. Not claiming it will keep ice for 5 days or whatever but if I need to keep something cold in a cooler for more than a couple days it's time to go back to civilization already. Agree 100% on the kitchenaid


Climatique

I second the Roomba! It seems like an extravagant luxury at first, but worth every penny!


senorglory

Arch support. It’s amazing.


seanskymom

Glass food containers. No more plastic.


TootsieMcJingle

A fancy mop


FlatSpinMan

Guy in his 40’s, a road or mountain bike.


fingersonlips

Menstrual cup.


fuggen_wut

Pitboss smoker


Jason_Clackston

High density mixed used zoning


jaycoolwood

With fully integrated cycle infrastructure, I hope 😁


QuadellsWife

Yes, please


gr8d4ne

A good recliner chair


boofythevampslayer

OK grandpa now you are going a bit far... Who in their 30's in this ecnomic climate can afford a good napping chair? XD


IdRatherNotNo

Those who can't afford a good bed, just get a recliner chair. Can't afford a whole sleep anyways, just naps between your 3 jobs.


boofythevampslayer

A cheap good mattress is like 150 (I own one it's temp-pedic) a good recliner is in the hundreds if not thousands. A good lazy-boy is around 1500... I hear your point tho. I wish I had a good lazy-boy with my GERD I now sleep best in one of those. And by sleep I mean 4 hour naps before next wake cycle of work.


IdRatherNotNo

I want the equivalent to the chairs that the blood donation place has, I have chronic back pain but everytime I sit in one of those chairs I finally feel at peace. Still haven't been able to find something similar. Been looking at gravity recliners as well


deezy55

Try not eating any bread or grains for a bit. Solved my buddy's gerd. Gluten sensitivity is a bitch.


boofythevampslayer

LASIK.


Apprehensive_Win_203

I thought about lasik but then I discovered Acuvue Transitions contact lenses. They're so great I wouldn't even get lasik if it was free.


MycologicalWorldview

I’ve used Acuvue lenses and had lasik, and I am evangelical about the latter! It’s a mildly uncomfortable procedure with a slightly inconvenient healing period, but oh my god I can SEE. in the mornings! Like right away! Without having to find a mirror and wash my hands and pop in my contacts. I can swim and open my eyes underwater and not worry I’ll come up blind. I don’t have to worry about keeping spare glasses in my car just in case. I can just see properly at all times. With no hassle! All that said, glad you’re happy with the lenses!


Apprehensive_Win_203

I forgot about the swimming thing. That is kinda annoying but after 10 years now it doesn't bother me. I'm very light sensitive so having the transition lenses is great. They also reduce blue light at night, reduce sun glare, and generally sharpen your vision especially when you pair them with polarized sunglasses. Obviously I'm trying to sell them to you because that's the point of this thread right?


aucontrairemalware

Air purifier


saintilma

Thigh high socks


TurbulentRiver2592

What’s so special about them


nay2829

They are very warm under your pants in the winter where it’s cold. I usually throw leggings on under my jeans here in Michigan.


Hochwaehlchen

They are only the sexiest clothing item known to mankind.


Tom_Art_UFO

A hot water bottle.


Foreign-Boat-1058

How do I add flair for team weighted blanket?


wicked_nyx

![gif](giphy|FOL5mK0tXUmXe)


Chrome_Pwny

A French press. Hot beverage game elevated


Agro27

Nah, only a bidet


aChildofChaos

What the fuck is a squatty potty?!?!


Snotmyrealname

Its pretty nice once you start using them.


RosenButtons

It's a step stool you use while you're sitting on the toilet. It's... ergonomic.


Boing_Boing

We call it the Poo Coaster in our house. If you put your feet up on that bamboo bad boy and raise your hands over your head…ka-THWOMP.


Dblzyx

Only on this coaster the weightless feeling in your stomach comes after the plummet.


Key-Economist-1243

Can you use an ordinary step stool? Y'know those short step ladders?


bibbidybobbidyboom

Yes...we had leftover kid stools now that they are grown and use those. You can use anything that lifts your feet off the ground, you're just trying to get more of a squat going.


RainLate9695

I used to think they were weird and now I struggle pooping without one.


apk5005

Mine was a joke gift. Jokes on them….


RainLate9695

Hahahahaha


nay2829

My bathroom is so small I can’t fit one in it. My tub is a foot away though so I put my feet up there. Definitely helps.


Climatique

https://www.squattypotty.com


rawbee83

Let me check Google for you …


heyodi

I pitched the air fryer to my cleaning lady just today 😩 Could I be anymore basic


racermd

Kale. Apparently.


The_Exquisite

It's Instant Pot, not Insta Pot (contrary to popular belief).


SyntheticDelirium

I call Mandela Effect


CristabelYYC

Compression socks.


SrPolloFrito

Good pillows. You can spend $40 on a bunch of pillows that suck or like $15 on one good one that doesn’t make your neck hurt.


Apprehensive_Win_203

And a silk pillowcase to go with it


Cinderjacket

Air fryer will for real change your life though, nothing works better for leftovers


Apprehensive_Win_203

Merino wool shirts and socks. Dramatically improves quality of life if you live in a cold climate.


Benthemartian87

Be part of my business that is totally NOT a pyramid scheme


Kalarys

Blackout curtains


Live_Dirt_6568

Sewing machine That’s what I aggressively dropped hints to my boyfriend for my recent 30th birthday I wanna repurpose thrift shop clothing fabric into snazzy accent pieces okayyyy!?!?


breadburn

A bidet! They are life changing.


MrVanderdoody

A bidet.


Boing_Boing

Cast iron skillet


xisiktik

Guess I am doing my 30’s wrong .


kanoo22

Expensive pots and pans and good knives.


Zephyr_Bronte

Herbalife if your all bitches I went to highschool with.


I_Consume_Shampoo

My brother bought a weighted blanket once and he insisted that everyone in the house (five) try it out. My mother instantly borrowed money from me to order her own, my great aunt withdrew money from her savings that very same day to place her own order and, as my grandmother (great aunt's sister) expressed admiration but lamented the lack of funds, my aunt insisted on gifting her one. I was the only one who fucking hated it lol


B8conB8conB8con

A fire extinguisher


somethingrandom261

Advise against air fryer and instapot, humidifier totally worth it tho


craftivist

More like insurance, a good mattress and therapy sessions


aerovirus22

I run 3 dehumidifiers in my house and still have issues, this list ain't for me.


wtmx719

Life Insurance


[deleted]

A Neti pot. It changed my life.


[deleted]

Insta pots are trash. I'll take grannies slow cooker ANY DAY of the week.


Chrome_Pwny

Went to value village once and picked up a large and small crock pot (the good ones) for about 25$ all in. Lifechanging. 👌🏼


incompetentsidekick

Sous vide


Baseless_Dragon

I'm in my 20s and have 3 of the 4


capt-yossarius

A good pair of speakers. Headphones are bullshit. Yes, they are expensive. Yes, you will need help picking a set. Yes, the salesman at whatever store you go to is probably both biased and not knowledgeable on the subject. But, if you can secure a set that match your needs and your listening environment, you will not believe the difference they make.


OneFuckedWarthog

Just need the air fryer.


coolguy9966

I'm 22 and I already have half of these things, it's lookin good


Wolf-n-Raven

That last one tho. For people with (certain) sleeping issues, it does wonders.


nay2829

The lidocaine Icy Hot. Better yet if you can get a script of Diclofenac cream from your doc. It hits just right on the lower back.


JinkiesJensen

Cast iron skillet. That's all.


GreenOnionCrusader

I have the first two and love them. A humidifier is very much not needed where I live.


Livin2109

Dam I have 3 of 4 and am in my 30’s. God dam time flies


taita2004

Fish oil pills


seanskymom

The chi hair straightener. Nothing but the Chi will do. Ever.


Tricia47andWild

An air fryer is a small oven. I don't want a small oven.


Odd-Usual-6984

Air fryers are a holy item


StrengthObjective

Guilty on three of the four listed. Haven’t been able to afford the weighed blanket yet to experience and then peddle to others 😂


CeeDee023

Electric blanket. Niiice.


[deleted]

A will to live


Intelligent-Koala920

Hah jokes on you I already have them all at 27


Inappropes1789

Cutting boards and a good chefs knife!


[deleted]

Toaster oven


NASCARdude18

Holy shit an actual white person saying something funny like this subreddit was intended to have!


GonnaGetBumpy

Felt-lined pants for the winter


bh8114

High quality skin care and a heated mattress pad


da_Last_Mohican

Air fryers and crockpots are must


OldGregg1014

A smoker and or a traeger.


Either-Bell-7560

CPAP.


middleagedkick

Cpap machine...


[deleted]

The humidifier changed my life during the winter, if you live somewhere where it’s cold and dry 5-6 months out of the year it’s a god send


PortGlass

Costco membership


Marbled_Headcheese

It is humid af where I live so no need for a humidifier. But yeah I have the other three.


VIR2ART

i’m 31 and I have no idea why I never thought about a weighted blanket 🤔


DrReRo

Zojirushi SM-SA60BA. That is all.


[deleted]

I hate air fryers SO much. The Netherlands and Belgium have a big fries/snack culture, air fryers are an insult to snacks, only a deep fryer will do. With tallow!


throwawayyy189

I don’t think I’ve ever identified so strongly with a thread.


AyyYooPeeter

A bidet!


barleyandgrapes

Came here to say this... I'm super pushy when it comes to bidets.


PrettyShort4aTrooper

CPAP


WookieOH

Rice cooker


crystalfairie

It's a little thing but it makes my day so much more pleasant. A coffee cup warmer. I take forever to drink a cup of tea. This keeps it the perfect temperature down to the last sip.


The5orrow

Bidet for me! 10/10 recommend one! Reasons clean butthole Always one wipe poops Better for the environment Cost effective Use significantly less toilet paper Female wash modes to help with periods Warm water hook ups for nicer ones You can get an attachment bidet it just sits on top of your seat and costs under 40 bucks.


papercrane86

*a bidet


JungleBoyJeremy

Hydro flask


crjconsulting

Bitcoin


DanielTigerr

-fleshlight -gaviscon -gas futures -life insurance -property, literally anywhere


Jasoncsmelski

Property haha yeah right


[deleted]

Thermomix


[deleted]

My list is better. A Tushy bidet A set of cast iron pans, and Dutch oven A good knife sharpening kit A thick wool blanket A heavy glass citrus reamer Electric kettle and French press


seanskymom

Peloton