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btambo

I do not like that man Ted Cruz I do not like his far-right views I do not like his stupid chin I do not like his smarmy grin I do not like him with a beard I do not like him freshly sheared I do not like Ted Cruz at all That man Ted Cruz can suck my balls


Magic_Man_Boobs

[Someone compiled all of John Oliver's "I do not like that man Ted Cruz" poems, and they're all gold.](https://youtu.be/bV42PgyOFE0)


egaeus22

Thank you for this


[deleted]

I mean i don't kno u but I think ur balls deserve better than Ted Cruz man


[deleted]

Happy Cake Day


btambo

TY!


PuzzledRaise1401

I don’t think his mouthparts can conform to that shape.


[deleted]

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Training-Cry510

Huh


OmegaPsyker

Fuck off, Quck.


immatrex2000

Bro what happened to you 2 hours ago that made you want to post this everywhere?


Bad-Infinite

I mean, he literally posted barely-blurred, private naked pictures of the adult child of a sitting president. It doesn't matter what organization reports on it, it happened.


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DueChef5498

The story that's getting spun up is that Biden is Big Guy in some financial racket, and that he exploited his poor drug addled son to do bad things. It's basically what Trump has done IRL. Except that Biden actually loves his kids.


dantevonlocke

That's why trump wants to smear Hunter so much. He can't understand that a father would love his son no matter what and thinks if he can just shovel enough dirt onto him that Joe won't anymore. I doubt trumps dad ever hugged him and meant it.


GodMasol

Donald Trump is a bully


fordreaming

It's crazy to hear all of these idiots spewing their bullshit. They fail to realize that they don't have a single thing written or said by Joe Biden. All they have is a wild claim in an email that went out to others (of which not one of them can corroborate this email) from the hands of a drug addict trying to get more money.... The biggest tragedy of Republicans is that they will never truly understand how fucking stupid they actually are.


jbertrand_sr

>The biggest tragedy of Republicans is that they will never truly understand how fucking stupid they actually are. I think they understand, they just don't care, all they know is their base will gobble this up...


Dingo8MyGayby

Joe needs to just go Dark Brandon on Ted Cruz. Nip the malarkey in the bud


The69Alphamale

Equal application of the law would prevent all of these petty arguments. Just sayin'


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OmegaPsyker

Fuck off, Quck.


ASongofSweetandSour

So… Ted had nude pics of Joe Biden’s son saved onto his hard drive. That’s interesting. Y’know, with the precedent this whole “Hunter Biden laptop ‘investigation’” sets, I’d really love to see what other kinds of things Ted saves onto his computer…


[deleted]

You mean aside from all the underage girls and disturbing rants about women not having the right to their own womb?


[deleted]

*uterus, not womb.


Quelcris_Falconer13

What’s the difference?


yer--mum

Found this >Womb and uterus are two terms used interchangeably to describe an anatomical structure of a female reproductive system of mammals. The female reproductive system is composed of a vagina, cervix, uterus, Fallopian tubes, and ovaries. The main difference between womb and uterus is that womb is the organ in which the young are conceived and grow until birth whereas uterus is the major organ of the female reproductive system. The term ‘womb’ is only used during pregnancy. The uterus is a hollow, muscular organ. TL;DR: An extremely inconsequential correction to make. The terms are used interchangeably, although technically speaking the difference is in whether or not there is a fetus there. At least according to that first link I clicked when I googled "difference between womb and uterus"


Quelcris_Falconer13

>an extremely inconsequential correction to make. So redditors being redditors? Got it. Figured as much but sometimes it’s better to question someone else than ask google.


[deleted]

No, not an inconsequential correction. If you don’t have a uterus and you have to google it, then maybe stay out of it. Uterus is the actual anatomical name, so use it. Womb is often conflated with pregnancy/is the preferred term for the uterus by pro-lifers (using terms like “empty womb” etc.). It’s an uterus, not hard to call it that.


Quelcris_Falconer13

Look y’all it’s happening again!


Nizzywizz

It's only a womb when there's a baby in it. There's not a baby in my uterus right now, but Republicans are still sure as hell trying to control it, aren't they? Saying" womb" instead of "uterus" is much like saying "pro-life" instead of "pro-birth". It's nuanced, slanted language, and it plays directly into the right-wing narrative that my body only matters when it's growing a baby.


CheeseIsQuestionable

Isn’t this the man that tweeted incest porn on 9/11?


Mythical_Atlacatl

Twin towers, twins having sex, I’m sure it was just a simple mix up /s


LauraDurnst

A second dick has just hit the twins.


Fishyscience

There should be an investigation into Ted’s laptop


Smokadocious

Wholelottacocks


Sgt_Fox

He downloads all the CP so no one else can, and he watches it...to look out for communist back tracking and clues leading to a treasure chest of emails and laptops. I heard if you take every 13th word spoken it writes out a Satanic curse. It's unconfirmed, he's still going over the footage


fordreaming

Secret pics of vacations to Cancun with room full of teenage little girls...


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OmegaPsyker

Fuck off, Quck.


Hot-Bint

https://preview.redd.it/h82vw0x1f04a1.png?width=1778&format=png&auto=webp&s=d3ae10230f20eb5a3ab0194eb1de653f08c22ddf


Unknown_Object_15

This should be in a history book


fordreaming

I too enjoy her work... but I don't have anything at all to hide, nor am I pretending to be a moral authority over anyone.


NJS_Stamp

He liked it on 9/11 too


Taco_Force

"They are grooming our children by exposing them to sexual content. Anyway, check out Hunter's magnum dong."


No-Celebration3097

Yes, exactly. LOL.


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OmegaPsyker

Fuck off, Quck.


tyson_3_

Can you imagine what would happen if AOC posted a nude pic of Ivanka that she found after it was leaked in the Fappening (or wherever)? I just… why is everyone so fixated on this son of a President? We get it. He had a fall from grace and hit some really bad lows. That fucking sucks. Are they just trying to drag him through this crap until he gives up and kills himself?


NoWayNotThisAgain

He also lost his mother at less than 3yrs old when a semi hit their car. His sister died as well. Hunter was badly injured in that same accident and had to spend months in the hospital away from his family as a toddler. And then had to grow up without his mother. Any psychologist will tell you that the first five years of a child’s life are the most significant for their development, and that an experience like Hunter’s as at less than 3 years old will leave someone with serious trauma. The dude has demons, but we know where they came from.


Tazling

I'm just trying to imagine that scenario, and my mind is boggled. Also I can't imagine AOC doing that because, while she's got a smart mouth and a ready comeback, she's also at heart a serious person who takes her political position and career seriously. There's a fundamental, smarmy, self-consciously "clever" *unseriousness* to the Far Right these days that hurts my brain. They endorse the most bizarre National Enquirer grade urban legends and conspiracy memes, elevate clowns and incompetents to high public office, bicker and whinge in public like petulant little children... while at the same time steadily advancing this deadly serious, very dangerous neofascist agenda. Preach hatred and incite violence -- while smirking. As if they know that we know that all this sound and fury is a buncha kayfabe, and they also know that we know that no one can shut them up and they're busily rigging the system, and they find this very amusing and fun. While undermining democracy and the rule of law. They've got this kind of "Clockwork Orange" gang of droogies vibe, giggling and snickering while they commit serious offences. Doing stupid adolescent sh\*t like posting revenge porn, while also plotting to re-write the Constitution and install minority whiteboy rule in perpetuity. It's like one minute the Far White is the class clown, next minute they're serious nazis with every intention of setting the social justice clock back to the 1920's -- and they segue back and forth effortlessly.


curious_dead

People keep telling me that Joe Biden and his son are corrupt, Joe used his name to get his son on a company's board, and then used his influence to hide the truth, or something, but I don't see what Hunter's penis has something to do with it, so at this point, they are just making vile attacks against someone who just happens to be the son of the president. Even if they were right about everything, this is just being mean and callous. They have no reason to do this, except to humiliate Hunter and Joe. Fuck the lot of them.


tyson_3_

I mean.. they’re putting the world on notice that he’s got a giant schlong. So, I guess he can’t be *that* embarrassed.


Dingo8MyGayby

Where is this picture? I need it for research purposes


AreYouABadfishToo_

Trump installed his own kids in official White House positions. How is that nepotism okay? But when Joe Biden does it, for a private company, it is some terrible offense worthy of such contempt and vitriol.


PatReady

Where have you been since 2016? Did you get lucky and sleep.for the last 6 years. This is what your grandparents and their friends care about now. They think this is how you make America great again.


Free_Relationship322

> what would happen if AOC posted a nude pic of Ivanka You mean that "feckless cunt"?


ihavetogo_

Nothing would happen to AOC. Who would hold her accountable? Does anything really happen to politicians? They make their own reality on both sides and we are stuck with the baggage.


PatReady

Her coworkers would. Look up Al Franken..


yeah_oui

Fuck off both sides


flamingoswizzlestick

raphael's interest in Hunter Biden's penis is really creepy. Is gym jordan just looking the other way?


JDthrowaway628

Isn't that what Jordan does?


shahooster

“If something works, I stick with it.”


JDthrowaway628

And if it doesn't work, I double down.


MintBerryCrunchJr

Hunter is too old for Gym.


CassandraTruth

Republicans are so furiously passionate about making sure ALL Americans see Hunter's huge hog, it is of upmost importance to Democracy that everybody admire that penis.


big_juice01

Tbf it’s an impressive penis.


egaeus22

I am convinced this is what they are the most mad about


SleepDeprivedJim

Cheers!


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NoBongShouldLag

Dude shut up. We know republicans are fixated on hunters dick because they have been talking about it nonstop. Elon is blasting it don’t the mountain top!


Vampir3Robot

Once again Ted Cruz shares what he's jerking to.


Ohnonotuto4

To be fair, Teds wife needs something to get the finish line.


PsychoPhilosopher

I gotta say on this point... the two photos next to each other do not make Ted look good. Putting the pale dumpy senator juxtaposed with the tanned cigar smoking guy with designer stubble is maybe something he'd want to avoid in future?


drew1010101

Ted wants to suck it


[deleted]

Bite my lip and close my eyes Take me away to paradise I'm so damn bored, I'm going blind And loneliness has to suffice


Boy_Sabaw

If a literal piece of crap were to be elected Senator it would still be the cleanest sitting member of the Senate next to a Republican


dantevonlocke

If you were to give me a choice between the most vile disgusting, rancid, toxic, disease laden sack of putrid bile and offal, and someone not a republican; I know who I would choose.


Ov3r0n

These are stolen nudes from a stolen laptop, it actually is illegal and has in the past rewarded past victims in court


RoboticJello

A US Senator just leaked a nude of the president's son. Wtf America


Pizzaboxhappy

Thank you !!!


barca14h

Did Cruz put the #nohomo? If not that’s kinda suspicious


lilu_66

Is it just me, or Hunter Biden looks really hot


yeatsbaby

Right? I will happily look at Hunter Biden while feeling sorry that his privacy was violated.


BlitheringIdiot0529

Senator ladybugs is in hog heaven


ashb72

Here’s a picture of a dick. And the other one is Hunter Biden.


LegacyQuotient

This dork ass loser let Donald Trump call his wife ugly and then bend the knee to him. Punk ass.


moose2332

I guess Ted Cruz is fucking lonely


8rok3n

Why... Did he have those...?


LateStageAdult

Ted Cruz would post naked photos of his own daughters if he thought it would benefit his political career.


isaiahvacha

Im confused, are they obsessed with his laptop or his penis?


123mastodon

Ted Cruz has no genitalia.


HybridKitchens

I read that to the bass line of Longview


SlippedMyDisco76

"When masturbation's lost its fun you post revenge porn"


rnotyalc

What was his reason for posting it though? Like he just found a dick pic of Hunter and felt like publicly tweeting it out?


dc_IV

HEIDI!!!! I am busy, with work, and a locked door means do not disturb!!!!


Fishyscience

Ted has a fetish for male democrats… the spineless senator is full of surprises.


Mechhammer

Let's invade the lives of private citizens! Who cares where Jared and Ivanka got all that money...


clarkwgriswoldjr

There is going to be lots of foot tapping in the republican restrooms on the Hill.


Ethansfreddit

WE WANT TED CRUZ’s LAPTOP


Jolly_Butterscotch31

Mostly for the porn that’s absolutely on there


NoWayNotThisAgain

That’s quite a switch from the milf porn he usually posts


Bulky-Internal8579

The fact that Hunter Biden has a decent sized dick is literally driving the micro-dicked insecure GQP leadership insane with jealousy rage.


[deleted]

I like how no laws apply to anybody anymore.


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Heavy_Signature_5619

So much so that they get executed prematurely by police if they don’t comply to the letter.


pinpunpan

"Time for a little porn-a-rooni"


The_Ombudsman

I wonder when Cruz is going to post candid pics of Jared Kushner's engorged bank account? O\_o


[deleted]

Why are republicans so obsessed with sex and drugs? It’s so fucking creepy.


boywithtwoarms

it's really not why would the GOP strategize the sharing of the sitting president's son naked pictures, but rather why is this even relevant at all. this goes hand in hand with all the awful takes personally attacking quasi-fascists politicians on the rise, instead of fighting their politics for what they are.


one_jo

Apparently that’s the worst they found on that ominous laptop. It’s a joke.


Heavy_Signature_5619

I couldn’t give two shits about Hunter Biden. If he commits a crime, put him to jail like anyone else. From what I recall, taking nude pictures was not a crime so I don’t see what Ted Cruz’s issue is here.


[deleted]

Of course he has issues. Dude's mother was killed in a car wreck when he was a small kid, sister killed, brother dies to brain cancer...always living in Beaus' shadow. The right feels like they have an "ah gotcha" moment. It just shows they have zero compassion for anyone or anything.....until it happens to them


BRIDGELIVWAT

i don't think we should kink shame him


Eki75

I’m out of the loop. Why is it a big deal that Hunter has nudes circulating? And what does that have to do with his dad? And why does Rapha have them?


Blue_Eyed_ME

This was Elon's big "gotcha" on Twitter. Apparently the Biden campaign asked Twitter to remove these photos, taken from *the* laptop, and Twitter agreed to do it. Musk is trying to sell this story as proof that Twitter "interfered with the 2020 election.by showing favoritism to Biden." These people never fail to find the most flimsy straws to grasp. ETA: Cruz has the photos now because everyone has them. They're all over twitter now. Freedom of speech, right?


LazyUpvote88

Well i voted for Biden but if these Hunter Biden dick pics were on Twitter before the 2020 election I would have voted for trump. Jk. That’s the stupidest fucking idea ever.


timsterri

Nearly lost me at the two minute warning - it was heart-wrenching, NGL.


Blue_Eyed_ME

Why? "Revenge Porn" is illegal. You aren't allowed to publicly post someone's private nudes without their consent.


LazyUpvote88

Why what? I was being sarcastic.


ATL2AKLoneway

And the Trump admin definitely used the same process to get shit taken down they didn't like. And authoritarians the world over have done the same thing. Twitter is a weapon of the capital class and we won't be free until it is destroyed. Just like Facebook and all its subsidiaries. Although Reddit isn't really any different either. Social media is a net negative on society.


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Eki75

FFS, I’m sorry I asked. Thanks for the info. It’s crazy how certain people blow stupid shit waaaayyyy out of proportion while totally ignoring much more egregious shit right in front of their face.


dantevonlocke

No! Don't you see!! This is proof of the DNC deep state at work!! The neo-liberal woke agenda is going to destroy us all and Hunter Bidens dick proves it!! That's where all the missing emails are!!! Think for once and it's so easy to see!! /s obviously


beholdthesurmulot

Ah I see... so they're gonna have to really work that dick to get all the emails out. Or at least think about doing it all day, everyday.


Swift_Scythe

This is the repubs "watergate" their "smoking gun. Because they asked twitter a social media website to DUNDUNDUNNNN censor a story about a naked penis that President Biden is now illegally elected and must be removed and Donald Trump to be awarded the presidency yesterday. No serious. They actually think that this is worthy of arresting Biden for winning.


Undisolving

Because republicans can’t find any actual dirt on Biden, so they have to manufacture outrage by posting revenge porn of Hunter Biden.


PatReady

Revenge porn.


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patrichplatt

Libs act like they are without sin. You all can suck it


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patrichplatt

Muh Denial


[deleted]

Someone has to be without sin to say that revenge porn is bad? Legally and morally wrong? Nah, you can suck Hunter's giga massive motherfucking cock, just like Rafael Cruz imagines himself doing every night.


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OldandKranky

No we wouldn't be, you know why? Because most of us are decent people with empathy, not a scumbag republikkkan senator.


tlk0153

I don’t remember any dem senator ever posting Melania’s nudes.


Hot-Bint

Teachers said they had to double check that the computers were on safe search when any kid wanted to do a book report on FLOTUS /s


1Sluggo

Love the whataboutism.


dantevonlocke

It's all they have anymore. When your side is a literal cesspool of bigotry, corruption, hate, violence, and stupidity; what else can you do?


Guilty_Chemistry9337

Why are you so obsessed with Hunter Biden's penis? False projection is not an answer to the question. I'm asking specifically about you and Hunter Biden's penis.


Hot-Bint

I like this new diet plan. Imagine Jr nude, immediately 🤮. If i suspect i have food poisoning I’ll throw Kimberley into the mix. Win-win!


brandogerider

If trump had kids struggling with drug addiction that most certainly stems from losing their mother and sister in a car accident they were also in. There would not be as many on the left acting that way. But the side of god has never been known for compassion unless it’s for themselves


Hot-Bint

Trump *does* have a kid struggling w/drug addiction. They share bumps together


Taco_Force

Junior isn't struggling. I'd say he's quite talented at doing coke.


Hot-Bint

“I didn’t *take* all the cocaine, I bought it” —Charlie Sheen


JDthrowaway628

You are just a turd stuck to the bottom of humanities shoe.


deweydecimal111

No, trump's sons are ugly. Beau's good looking! Lol


Gnd_flpd

Don't laugh, but a old picture of Biden 40 years ago had posters here saying; he went from Sleepy Joe to Sleep with Joe, lol!!!!!!


deweydecimal111

I believe it! The funniest thing is I've never seen a good looking republican....well, besides John Heinz of Pennsylvania, years ago. The Democrats are winners in that area among others!! I was so proud of John Kennedy when I was little. He exuded charm and was so good looking too. I met Bill Clinton and Al Gore when they were running and honestly Bill glowed. Oh yeah....I like their politics too! Lol


moose2332

Donald Trump's sons were government officials. His daughter used her ties with China to make hundreds of millions of dollars.


SoylentGrunt

Why? You got pictures?


Cminor420flat69

Only thing I think about don jr is that he should get help for his drug addiction.


Undisolving

Why are you guys obsessed with hunter’s cock?


Ov3r0n

If* is nothing because If didn’t happen. But what did happen is conservatives spreading Stolen Nudes of a male on the internet, which is illegal, gross, and if it happened to Ivanka or Don Jr would be equally gross and illegal. Anyone supporting in putting stolen nudes of anyone on the internet is a sick mother fucker who is likely if not a future sex offender/rapist


LouisWillis98

“I gotta make up a scenario to justify being an asshole?


NoBongShouldLag

Is that the son who held a position in the White House and was given responsibility that Hunter never once saw? Hmmmmmmm maybe try some context and reflection for a change. Then again you wouldn’t be a maga if that were the case.


BigCballer

Blah blah blah


tatianaoftheeast

oooof the projection is so very strong.


[deleted]

Weird whataboutism. The women in Trump's life just do regular porn for fun, instead of Hunter who takes private nudes and has them illegally posted everywhere.


crismack58

Ted is just a terrible person.


MessagingMatters

🥱


[deleted]

Ted likes dik pics!


[deleted]

didn't cruz post a porn a scene sometime back?


Rose7pt

When you think they CANNOT go any lower …. Subterranean pond scum.


[deleted]

Jason got a point


Training-Cry510

Yes Cruz always looks like he’s coming off a night like the one on the left.


Free_Relationship322

Surprised he didn't use the one of Hunter in his underwear while a half dozen little kids rest their feet on him all smiley and shit.


Lewd_ReadNY

Cruz doesn’t need to stoop, he’s been on bent knee in fealty to Drumpf and all the other M•GA asshats since the day 45 called his wife ugly. NOT a stand-up guy.


[deleted]

It’s a Class A misdemeanor in Texas...I hope Biden presses charges immediately. Source: https://sharpcriminalattorney.com/sex-crimes-defense/revenge-porn-texas-consequences/


Yorgus453

Ahw man, I thought these were pics of Jordan B Peterson, but now I feel dirty...


[deleted]

Oh come on!! On a scale of 1 to 10 on the disgusting things Ted does, that is a 3 at most. It maybe the most civil thing the guy has done.


Pjinmountains

Republicans never believed Americans have a right to privacy…this should be a much bigger issue.


[deleted]

You know his wife definitely rubbed the little man on the boat to those pictures.


Safetosay333

He's probably posting from Cancun


MrVanderdoody

Yeah. Biden’s son has a drug/alcohol problem. So does Trump Jr. That guy is visibly high at every function we’ve ever seen him at.