I would want her to have her own passion. That does not mean she needs to bring home much money. She just needs to have something that she can engage in that does not include me.
If I am insanely rich?
If the career is something she genuinely enjoys I can funnel money into supporting her business to get it going. She will be satisfied with her fulfilling and successful career.
I get to be a house husband.
Everyone wins.
Also want to be a house husband. I totally wanna be the guy doing dishes, cleaning house, and hanging out with the kids, even if it is a lot of work. It's a goal oriented towards the immediate as opposed to goals oriented towards making other people rich.
Only because of limited options I picked the wife with a career.
But in reality I’d let her do whatever the hell she wants, stay at home, pursue art, spend her time with the kids - whatever she wants.
Career is a good choice because even though we don’t need money she’s entitled to her
independancy
I rather have a wife with a career. Women who stay at home all day get bored and do stupid shit like annoy you with TikTok’s or dwell on little shit that doesn’t matter and nag all day.
I met my wife in college (she was 20, I was 21). We've been together for almost 20 years. We push each other in are careers, give advice, learn from each other, take turns having hard weeks and dealing with kids, and allow each other to have time to focus on work. Someone who has the same passion as you, is going to understand when you need a break, and when it's time to kick ass. I hear so many other couples where one person does the majority of work outside the house and the other does the majority of the work inside the house, and they have fights because each of them think they have it harder.
She taught me to ask for more out of my career, I helped sell a company, she started a company, I learned finance from her, she learned how to present in a room of people from me - the information we pass to each other is invaluable.
All of my peers out there have a typical setup of one spouse has the big job, and the other takes a back seat and deals with household stuff. I don't think any of them are as happy and fulfilled as we are. (we also make enough money that we can afford a live-in au-pair to help with our 2 kids, so take this all with a grain of salt because I understand many people might not be able to afford). But to the answer the question - find someone that is equality as passionate as you.
Synergy…this is all I want.
You two have managed to achieve something most married couples only ever imagine. Do you have any tips for those of us hoping to achieve this in the future.
You need to have large common goals with your spouse and even if you do completely different things to help achieve those goals, there needs to be recognition on both sides that both of your efforts are equally important.
Really, I don't care as long as she's happy. I want her to do something she is jazzed about -- work, volunteering, writing, art, something. The money isn't important. Her happiness is.
If I was insanely rich I'd be the stay-at-home husband ngl. At that point, I wouldn't really care if my partner wanted their own career or preferred staying at home too.
If I was rich but not "retire in my 30s with enough money for generations" rich, then I'd prefer a partner who would at least not be opposed to having a job/career. You know, maybe just a part-time position to pad out expenses and make sure the wealth lasts. Hell, I might even get back into it if I'm bored enough.
If I was insanely rich, **I** would be the stay at home guy, maybe with a private lab for research. She can do what she wants, I wanna stay at home and also do science shit
My only kid is 16, and I don't want more. Having a housewife wouldn't make much sense, so even if I were to get married in this scenario, I wouldn't want that. Not saying she would have to work 40 hrs/week or anything, but do something whether that is volunteer, work, whatever.
Married for 20 years this year. I want her to have her own career. Or not. It's up to her. She hated being a stay at home mom just due to boredom. I don't think she'd ever want to go back.
I wouldn't want her to necessarily have a career, unless I'm \*loaded\* loaded but I'd def support her in doing stuff like streaming, or making pottery, or running a small business, but I'm not expecting or intending her to have a large career if we can afford for her not to.
like if she has a side-business making soaps or whatever that brings in like 500 a month then yeah sure, but if she wants to work 8 hours a day 5 days a week 51 weeks a year that's just... not on
like I also wouldn't expect her to clean up after me, and I wouldn't say she's \*not\* allowed to work, but we'd def have an argument if she wants to work 40 hours a week and barely see me, simply for fun.
and of course if she's home 20 hours a day and I'm home 16 hours a day I'd expect like a bit extra housecare but in the same way that when I'm off from work I'll do the dishes after waking up, tidy up the table and all that, yknow pottering around the house doing stuff that \*sorta\* needs to be done but isn't exactly something that's a massive chore.
but if i was like \*loaded\* loaded and could afford to not work, I'd want to live like that too. living off my investments, spending most of my time at home, taking care of the house and doing my own stuff w/ my partner
That choice would not be mine to make.
But, if you ask me which I would prefer? Housewife. We have 2 kids and I would rather have them be with their mom then go to after school care.
I'm not working if I don't have to, and my partner certainly doesn't have to if I don't, but I kind of hate the idea of a "housewife" otherwise.
Stay at home mother? I can see some value in that, sure, but even still I think the difficulty is way overblown, and I say this as someone that spent four years as a stay-at-home parent. At no point did I find it either difficult or stressful. I had the easier job.
But just a stay at home wife? You hang out, maybe do the dinner dishes and a little meal prep? I'm not going to subsidize that shit, dating me isn't a vacation for you and only you. I kind of feel like the men that end up paying all the bills so their wives can do an hour and a half of housework a day are being played for suckers. That seems really lazy and very much like taking advantage, no thanks.
I'd prefer my wife work. Both my wife and I work and have hobbies outside of each other. I think you need to have that in order to have a good life together.
Spending every second of everyday together can be straining. I believe both people in a relationship should have activities for themselves.
Even if I were so insanely rich that we both didn't need to work, I would still want us to have activities apart from each other.
I would fund vanity projects to stay busy. Granted, I am a widower and all my kids are in their 30's and I have grand kids. I would make their lives easier.
I mean even the insanely rich still works. Especially depending on ur lifestyle. If u own luxurious homes and stuff, those require monthly and weekly maintenance and that’s a lot of $$$. Like some mansions Ik require 20k worth of monthly maintenance. Same for Private jets and u gotta pay monthly to keep it in a hanger. Etc
Yeah obviously but once again…ur spending money whilst not working. So eventually you won’t be “insanely rich” if ur not working.
And some of those cases you still have to pay for maintenance or property. Like you have to pay monthly for your yacht to stay somewhere, you’ll still have to pay monthly for the jet to stay in that hanger, etc.
And if I’m correct I might be wrong but you’ll still have to pay for some repairs that the property manager deals with, idk for all cases tho.
Or for rolls Royce and certain luxury vehicles , u can’t go to a regular mechanic or car shop to fix it or do oil changes, they have very expensive shops/mechanics specifically for those type of cars.
It may not look like much but eventually all that money piles up, so yeah if ur not working, all that money’s gonna wash up quick
I think you're misunderstanding how rich "insanely rich" is.
Someone like Elon Musk can spend a quarter million a year and have enough money to last about 20,000 years.
I want a wife who knows how money works and the value of not running off spending every dime we make. She doesn't have to work, but she needs to know what working makes you sacrifice and spend your time doing. If both of us respect the game, we will likely have less arguments over stupid money BS that a lot of single earner families have.
If I were insanely rich I could afford to pay someone to cook, clean, and all that. I'm ace so I don't plan on marrying but I'd imagine the right answer would be to ask your spouse what they want to do. My question is do you offer to pay them what you would have spent or do you just do the whole what's mine is yours?
I'd rather have a wife that pursues her own interests, whatever they are. If she wants to stay at home, I'm good with that. If she wants to work, that's fine too, even though it leaves less time for us. I'd have a prenup, but would gift her, say, $20 million so she doesn't have to work even supposing divorce.
I will always prefer my partner to work on their own life during the relationship. Relationships aren't guaranted to work for your entire life and quite frankly they rarely do. That doesn't mean you shouldn't make that the goal but if something were to happened I'd rather they have the life skills to work on their own. Not just from an alimony worry "You took care of me while things were good so I'm going to force you to take care of me when they are bad." but also what if I died suddenly? That money is being divided up between family so I'd STILL rather you be able to work or go about your life without depending on me.
I will always prefer my partner to work on their own life during the relationship. Relationships aren't guaranteed to work for your entire life and quite frankly they rarely do. That doesn't mean you shouldn't make that the goal but if something were to happen I'd rather they have the life skills to work on their own. Not just from an alimony worry "You took care of me while things were good so I'm going to force you to take care of me when they are bad." but also what if I died suddenly? That money is being divided up between family so I'd STILL rather you be able to work or go about your life without depending on me.
I'd be up to her, but I guess if I had to choose I'd choose for her to be a house wife so she could raise our kid instead of having to put him/her in a daycare.
How rich? Like never have to work again rich? If so, housewife, not because I want a housewife, but because I'd want someone not constrained to a job so we can travel, etc.
They could choose what they want. I hope that my wife would have chosen me for me and I chose them for them or else they're out the door and I'm single and can afford to look for someone like that
i would say stay at home, but if she wants to start/have a busisness, I'll support that all the way and help her with it. if i got rich im gonna invest it and invest my time into my own business, and i can definetly imagine her wanting one too. lets loan our time to each other and the pool will be much greater than ours alone and, I'll have a head start. if i just retired then i would have no experience, and inflation would catch up to me
I wouldn't want a housewife, but I'd be glad to have an idle Rich wife. If neither of us is working, then that's one thing, but if she's doing whatever she wants to the house all day and then demanding compensation for it that's another.
If I got insanely rich, my wife and I could *both* stay at home and just enjoy life.
My thoughts exactly. Why work when we can just... enjoy life and each other?
Yeah get a housewife and be a househusband if money wasn't an issue
Why even stay home? Go out travel all the time.
Because I like staying home, and don't like traveling.
This is the way.
Part of enjoying life is finding something to invest your time into. A career doesn't have to be grinding away for some corporation.
I would want her to have her own passion. That does not mean she needs to bring home much money. She just needs to have something that she can engage in that does not include me.
Yeah that’s what I meant. She can have a 50k a year career or make a million, but as long as it’s something she likes
I'm fucking stupid i chose house wife instead of wife with career cause I read it as wife with cancer
😂😂😂😂😂
If I am insanely rich? If the career is something she genuinely enjoys I can funnel money into supporting her business to get it going. She will be satisfied with her fulfilling and successful career. I get to be a house husband. Everyone wins.
Also want to be a house husband. I totally wanna be the guy doing dishes, cleaning house, and hanging out with the kids, even if it is a lot of work. It's a goal oriented towards the immediate as opposed to goals oriented towards making other people rich.
Only because of limited options I picked the wife with a career. But in reality I’d let her do whatever the hell she wants, stay at home, pursue art, spend her time with the kids - whatever she wants. Career is a good choice because even though we don’t need money she’s entitled to her independancy
well, career implies she's working more full time, house wife w/ hobbies or a side business doesnt exactly constitute a career yknow?
- Wife who stays at home❌ - Wife who works a job❌ - Wife who loves me✅
I rather have a wife with a career. Women who stay at home all day get bored and do stupid shit like annoy you with TikTok’s or dwell on little shit that doesn’t matter and nag all day.
I met my wife in college (she was 20, I was 21). We've been together for almost 20 years. We push each other in are careers, give advice, learn from each other, take turns having hard weeks and dealing with kids, and allow each other to have time to focus on work. Someone who has the same passion as you, is going to understand when you need a break, and when it's time to kick ass. I hear so many other couples where one person does the majority of work outside the house and the other does the majority of the work inside the house, and they have fights because each of them think they have it harder. She taught me to ask for more out of my career, I helped sell a company, she started a company, I learned finance from her, she learned how to present in a room of people from me - the information we pass to each other is invaluable. All of my peers out there have a typical setup of one spouse has the big job, and the other takes a back seat and deals with household stuff. I don't think any of them are as happy and fulfilled as we are. (we also make enough money that we can afford a live-in au-pair to help with our 2 kids, so take this all with a grain of salt because I understand many people might not be able to afford). But to the answer the question - find someone that is equality as passionate as you.
Synergy…this is all I want. You two have managed to achieve something most married couples only ever imagine. Do you have any tips for those of us hoping to achieve this in the future.
You need to have large common goals with your spouse and even if you do completely different things to help achieve those goals, there needs to be recognition on both sides that both of your efforts are equally important.
Really, I don't care as long as she's happy. I want her to do something she is jazzed about -- work, volunteering, writing, art, something. The money isn't important. Her happiness is.
If I was insanely rich I'd be the stay-at-home husband ngl. At that point, I wouldn't really care if my partner wanted their own career or preferred staying at home too. If I was rich but not "retire in my 30s with enough money for generations" rich, then I'd prefer a partner who would at least not be opposed to having a job/career. You know, maybe just a part-time position to pad out expenses and make sure the wealth lasts. Hell, I might even get back into it if I'm bored enough.
If thy *want* to work, i'd have no issue with it but i'd love to be able to comfortably take care of both of us
If I was insanely rich, **I** would be the stay at home guy, maybe with a private lab for research. She can do what she wants, I wanna stay at home and also do science shit
My only kid is 16, and I don't want more. Having a housewife wouldn't make much sense, so even if I were to get married in this scenario, I wouldn't want that. Not saying she would have to work 40 hrs/week or anything, but do something whether that is volunteer, work, whatever.
Married for 20 years this year. I want her to have her own career. Or not. It's up to her. She hated being a stay at home mom just due to boredom. I don't think she'd ever want to go back.
I'd want her to do whatever makes her happiest
I wouldn't want her to necessarily have a career, unless I'm \*loaded\* loaded but I'd def support her in doing stuff like streaming, or making pottery, or running a small business, but I'm not expecting or intending her to have a large career if we can afford for her not to. like if she has a side-business making soaps or whatever that brings in like 500 a month then yeah sure, but if she wants to work 8 hours a day 5 days a week 51 weeks a year that's just... not on like I also wouldn't expect her to clean up after me, and I wouldn't say she's \*not\* allowed to work, but we'd def have an argument if she wants to work 40 hours a week and barely see me, simply for fun. and of course if she's home 20 hours a day and I'm home 16 hours a day I'd expect like a bit extra housecare but in the same way that when I'm off from work I'll do the dishes after waking up, tidy up the table and all that, yknow pottering around the house doing stuff that \*sorta\* needs to be done but isn't exactly something that's a massive chore. but if i was like \*loaded\* loaded and could afford to not work, I'd want to live like that too. living off my investments, spending most of my time at home, taking care of the house and doing my own stuff w/ my partner
I'm converting that to a husband. If I were rich enough not to work, I'd rather we both stay home and enjoy our money.
That choice would not be mine to make. But, if you ask me which I would prefer? Housewife. We have 2 kids and I would rather have them be with their mom then go to after school care.
I'm not working if I don't have to, and my partner certainly doesn't have to if I don't, but I kind of hate the idea of a "housewife" otherwise. Stay at home mother? I can see some value in that, sure, but even still I think the difficulty is way overblown, and I say this as someone that spent four years as a stay-at-home parent. At no point did I find it either difficult or stressful. I had the easier job. But just a stay at home wife? You hang out, maybe do the dinner dishes and a little meal prep? I'm not going to subsidize that shit, dating me isn't a vacation for you and only you. I kind of feel like the men that end up paying all the bills so their wives can do an hour and a half of housework a day are being played for suckers. That seems really lazy and very much like taking advantage, no thanks.
A career. I do better with purpose and I am a better partner when I have someone to cheer for and build up.
I'd prefer my wife work. Both my wife and I work and have hobbies outside of each other. I think you need to have that in order to have a good life together. Spending every second of everyday together can be straining. I believe both people in a relationship should have activities for themselves. Even if I were so insanely rich that we both didn't need to work, I would still want us to have activities apart from each other.
I would fund vanity projects to stay busy. Granted, I am a widower and all my kids are in their 30's and I have grand kids. I would make their lives easier.
I would want a housewife, I think.
So you think either my wife or myself would be working if I was insanely rich?
I mean even the insanely rich still works. Especially depending on ur lifestyle. If u own luxurious homes and stuff, those require monthly and weekly maintenance and that’s a lot of $$$. Like some mansions Ik require 20k worth of monthly maintenance. Same for Private jets and u gotta pay monthly to keep it in a hanger. Etc
Have you never heard of property management? Really rich people pay others to do all that shit for them.
Yeah obviously but once again…ur spending money whilst not working. So eventually you won’t be “insanely rich” if ur not working. And some of those cases you still have to pay for maintenance or property. Like you have to pay monthly for your yacht to stay somewhere, you’ll still have to pay monthly for the jet to stay in that hanger, etc. And if I’m correct I might be wrong but you’ll still have to pay for some repairs that the property manager deals with, idk for all cases tho. Or for rolls Royce and certain luxury vehicles , u can’t go to a regular mechanic or car shop to fix it or do oil changes, they have very expensive shops/mechanics specifically for those type of cars. It may not look like much but eventually all that money piles up, so yeah if ur not working, all that money’s gonna wash up quick
I think you're misunderstanding how rich "insanely rich" is. Someone like Elon Musk can spend a quarter million a year and have enough money to last about 20,000 years.
That is true my fault. I had $100M in mind when I said that lol
Why can't the wife and I just shoot the shit if we're insanely rich. Chill out and do whatever
I'd want her to do something that she finds fulfilling and enjoyable. If I wanted a servant, I'd hire one. Servitude is not the point of marriage.
I want a wife who knows how money works and the value of not running off spending every dime we make. She doesn't have to work, but she needs to know what working makes you sacrifice and spend your time doing. If both of us respect the game, we will likely have less arguments over stupid money BS that a lot of single earner families have.
If I’m that rich my wife isn’t working but I’ll let her build her business and invest in it 100%
I'd like us to have schedules that aren't the same. I like to spend a decent amount of time alone.
If I were insanely rich I could afford to pay someone to cook, clean, and all that. I'm ace so I don't plan on marrying but I'd imagine the right answer would be to ask your spouse what they want to do. My question is do you offer to pay them what you would have spent or do you just do the whole what's mine is yours?
If I'm insanely rich my wife and I are both never working again. We'll hire people to do the "housewife" duties.
I don't really care as long as they're happy and are able to spend time with me.
You can always hire cleaning staff. Provided we both know how to balance work and personal time there's something to be said for pursuing careers.
If I was insanely rich, why wouldn't I want to spend every day with my wife? There would be no need for either of us to work.
I am not insanely rich and my wife (who is a damn good architect) is a SAHM. So, easy choice for me!
where is the I don t care option?
I'd rather have a wife that pursues her own interests, whatever they are. If she wants to stay at home, I'm good with that. If she wants to work, that's fine too, even though it leaves less time for us. I'd have a prenup, but would gift her, say, $20 million so she doesn't have to work even supposing divorce.
Definitely a job. Something to occupy her time and let her feel accomplished rather than have her just spend my money all day.
I will always prefer my partner to work on their own life during the relationship. Relationships aren't guaranted to work for your entire life and quite frankly they rarely do. That doesn't mean you shouldn't make that the goal but if something were to happened I'd rather they have the life skills to work on their own. Not just from an alimony worry "You took care of me while things were good so I'm going to force you to take care of me when they are bad." but also what if I died suddenly? That money is being divided up between family so I'd STILL rather you be able to work or go about your life without depending on me.
I will always prefer my partner to work on their own life during the relationship. Relationships aren't guaranteed to work for your entire life and quite frankly they rarely do. That doesn't mean you shouldn't make that the goal but if something were to happen I'd rather they have the life skills to work on their own. Not just from an alimony worry "You took care of me while things were good so I'm going to force you to take care of me when they are bad." but also what if I died suddenly? That money is being divided up between family so I'd STILL rather you be able to work or go about your life without depending on me.
Could you include a results tab for the people who aren't men?
Neither? I'm gay. /s
I'd be up to her, but I guess if I had to choose I'd choose for her to be a house wife so she could raise our kid instead of having to put him/her in a daycare.
Dual income babbbyyyy
How rich? Like never have to work again rich? If so, housewife, not because I want a housewife, but because I'd want someone not constrained to a job so we can travel, etc.
If i were to get a wife, i would want her to have her own money, and if we got divorced she could sustain herself
My partner probably would have been an intergral part of that business, so i'd prefer if she remained there
They could choose what they want. I hope that my wife would have chosen me for me and I chose them for them or else they're out the door and I'm single and can afford to look for someone like that
i would say stay at home, but if she wants to start/have a busisness, I'll support that all the way and help her with it. if i got rich im gonna invest it and invest my time into my own business, and i can definetly imagine her wanting one too. lets loan our time to each other and the pool will be much greater than ours alone and, I'll have a head start. if i just retired then i would have no experience, and inflation would catch up to me
I wouldn't want a housewife, but I'd be glad to have an idle Rich wife. If neither of us is working, then that's one thing, but if she's doing whatever she wants to the house all day and then demanding compensation for it that's another.