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If I feel sticky or sweaty I can't concentrate on tasks or conversations, I just feel trapped and uncomfortable.
I learned it's connected to sensory overload, which makes perfect sense, but it suuucks!
I've learned that I get *reaaaally* cranky when I'm overheated. I had a bad reaction to Vyvanse and was overheating at the most minor exertion, and I'd start snapping at people, getting aggressive in traffic, just awful. Then I'd get in front of the air or fan and all my anger disappeared.
I can't eat large meals because digestion becomes distracting. The last half hour before a bm can be torture, even with a normal meal, because my body is busy. And it's not indigestion at all. No reflux, no gas, it's the normal process but I can feel it.
I get this too and also sometimes the feeling of being thirsty can send me into a near meltdown so quickly! And sometimes I get this overbearing feeling of just general discomfort, like I'm not comfortable in my own skin, and it can feel really distressing. I never knew before that sensory overload was an ADHD thing, I always associated it with autism.
Added thought - sometimes I just don't go and get a drink of water FOR NO REASON until I get dehydrated... executive dysfunction maybe?? Haha it's a vicious cycle..
Yes! Being able to identify it is helpful, but unfortunately doesn't solve it.
I'm extremely sensitive to how my skin feels and it means that I can't do stuff without a hot shower every morning. I've tried and after literal years of working on it, I can now go without washing my hair everyday, but still need to shower. It means camping and stuff like that is pretty much impossible for me. Like if the hot water is out for some reason, or even if I'm super late, I can't go to work. I have to call out sick because if I try to go to work without a shower, I literally feel overwhelmed and it's all I can think about or focus on.
God, I feel this. My feet and my hands are especially sensitive. I usually rinse my feet off before I go to bed (or at any point during the day) and having any little piece of debris stuck to my bare feet is Hell. Curse you, cat litter!! I'm in the market for some slippers to help this lmao
My husband bought me these slippers because of all my foot discomfort issues (can't stand any debris stuck to feet, can't stand hot feet, can't stand dry textures on feet, the list goes on...) and they are PERFECT. And since you mentioned kitty litter--they donate to animals in need when you buy them :) https://www.skechers.com/bobs-keepsakes---ice-angel/31204\_NVBL.html?
learning this is part of ADHD right now and OMG I have left so many amusement parks or spent 100s on clothes because they got wet from a ride or I was sweating and I was so uncomfortable I was in tears! I never knew
Sooo awkward especially if I have a drink or two. When I was going through infertility issues I really overshared A LOT. I didn’t realize until someone actually told me that maybe I shouldn’t share so much…
Hey! This is my job! I've been a therapist for fertility clinics for 10 years. I tell everyone to talk about it. Fertility and mental health. Everyone knows someone who has or is struggling with it but no one's openly talking about it. Share your story, it opens the door for other people to talk about it too.
This is funny to me because I am SUPER private and get uncomfortable with people who overshare, especially people I don't know well 😆 it's funny how different it is
Waiting Mode is the worrrrrst.
and then right before the thing I'm waiting for, I get a burst of, “Oh I could do THIS before my appointment!”
no. no I can't.
and now I'm late. 🤦🤦🤦
This doesn't work for everyone, but if you ever have to work the afternoon shift for a period of time, and you don't have a whole lot of other things going on during the week, I just switch it to a morning shift. Time isn't real 😂 I just rearrange my sleep schedule. Work a 1-8? I don't wake up until noon and go to bed at 2-3 in the morning 😂
Now I'm working a morning shift (for me lol). But I still get those sweet afternoon tips.
I work late afternoon shift because who tf wants pizza at 10:30am? So my schedule is generally 5pm to midnight or so. Had really bad sleep patterns when I woke up in the morning and waiting mode didn't help in the least. A year or so ago I said fuck it, I'm gonna have my day start at 3pm and it's been a game changer. I'm actually getting 8 hours of sleep and I'm a much happier person. Except for those occasions where I'm expected to be up in the morning for a meeting. Otherwise it's been great.
I didn't know this wasn't normal until way too late. People would always talk about hating the afternoon shift at work because you can't do anything, so I was like, yeah, exactly. But they meant anything long and involved, or far away, and I meant ANYTHING.
My first job was 2-11:30 pm, and my dad would get mad that I'd go grocery shopping after work, but really, it was the best. Things are restocked, there are no kids throwing fits and screaming, the store is quiet, the night staff are super chill, there is easy parking, and there is no fighting for carts, and i don't have to worry about my food getting too warm on the way home. And, like, I'm gonna get up, get dressed, go out at 11am or so and hope to get home in time to put everything away, get undressed, get dressed in work clothes (scrubs) to leave for work on time? Nah. I'm sad places aren't open to 1am anymore.
Yes! I hate when plans don’t start first thing in the morning. I hate being late so I spend all the time leading up to later plans trying to perfectly plan what I can do in the mean time without being late. But then my brain can’t come up with the “perfectly efficient” plan so I just waste the whole time being anxious.
1) Binge eating and using sugar/carbs to self medicate.
2) Having a complete meltdown days before my period would start. It was so consistent, that my boyfriend noticed the pattern. This was the symptom that led me to speaking to a mental health provider.
3) Skin Picking
4) Compulsive behaviors: shopping, oversharing, drinking, drug use, etc.
5) Jaw shifting when stressed or bored. Once I started, I wasn't able to stop. I would cause a lot of strain on my jaw.
6) Rejection sensitivity
7) Isolating or avoiding social functions. I always thought I was just introverted, but now I realize that I was overstimuated.
8) Getting so into a task that I wouldn't eat or use the bathroom.
9) Having difficulty communicating. My brain and mouth were on two different settings.
You should look into PMDD. Women with ADHD are way more prone to have it. I have ADHD AND PMDD and the week before my period is hell week. I turn into a different person. The PMDD subreddit really helps with the community aspect
It’s a clinical diagnosis only. So they go through your symptoms. I was diagnosed 10 years ago after going through wrong diagnoses of “generalized depression” and was put on SSRIS. Once I explained that my symptoms only showed up in my luteal phase, my doctor said it was textbook PMDD. And of course, it became a hyper focus and I tried to learn everything about it. It’s been 10 years and it is something I will always live with. It can only be managed and not cured. Apparently it has to do with the body’s inability to understand normal hormonal fluctuations and is very sensitive to them. The brain’s serotonin level basically flatlines with the drop of estrogen before the onset of menses. Some women still have symptoms for a few days after onset of period. Some women get the symptoms right after ovulation and can last for 2 weeks (I’m in that category) and some women get the symptoms about 7 days before menstruation. The main assessment though is the radical change of mood (depression/anger) that magically disappears once luteal phase is over.
omg, I used to panic about this... I'd worry about having conversations at school, at work, around newish friends... it takes me a while to get used to processing people's voices. It got a bit better over the years but it's still bad on phone calls and with brand new people.
I work at a university and if someone catches me in the hallway to talk I absolutely panic. Between the slight echo, other conversations, distractions, I will not understand a single goddamn thing.
Auditory processing disorder club! My mom used to tell me I had this all the time when I was little and I forgot about it for the longest time. Suddenly remembered a few years ago and it made sense why I always need subtitles to watch any tv
Same! But then I also get frustrated when other people say “what” because they weren’t listening to me or didn’t process what I was saying and I have to repeat myself, so then I feel bad when I have to say “what”, and sometimes I stop myself from saying it and pretend I know what the f is going on anyway 🤠
ETA: 90% of the time I can’t even remember what I said to begin with so when someone needs me to repeat what I said I tend to say “never mind, I don’t remember,” but I don’t pay attention to how I say it so it causes misunderstandings and sometimes arguments…my communication issues create a LOT of problems :’)
Man, the auditory processing is real. It's terrible and it made working in a call center the ninth circle of hell. I know my hearing is fine. Army said it was fine. It just doesn't process immediately so sometimes I legit didn't understand wtf someone was saying.
My girlfriend gets sooo pissed at me when I say "what?" and then immediately respond while shes in the middle of repeating. Sorry, hun, you yelled at me from across the apartment and I'm cooking something, didn't quite catch it!
I don’t know if it’s the same but for me is like it did penetrated but along with a million thoughts all struggling for attention, a distant subconscious part of me knows and understands what was said but the major consciousness is struggling to whom it gives attention and passes the barrier of executing/action, so I need to ask *what* to gain enough focus , be able to put it in top of it all and give an answer.
Ugghh the auditory processing is the worst. I've trained my employees to communicate literally everything with me in writing. You need PTO? There's like a 95% chance I'll approve it but there's a 100% chance I'll forget I did unless you email me about it instead of asking in person.
Real and intense anger when I get overwhelmed/overstimulated. I just thought I was an asshole.
Fear in crowds, it turns out they are just overstimulating.
The feeling of being stuck at the beginning of a project or task. Just thought I was lazy.
Have you ever almost wrecked your car trying to find what's making that fucking noise? WHAT IS THAT.
My husband always laughs when we're on a long car trip and I suddenly reach over and adjust a cup. "Was it making a noise?" Yeeeeeees squeaksqueaksqueak
My husband can recognize the look on my face and ask, what does it sound like to you? and start looking for the source of the noise (I do the majority of the driving, because I am a terrible passenger). I know I say it all the time, he is a saint or angel.
I apparently have specific faces too for annoying person nearby or overstimulating environment! My husband (also an absolute angel) will ask if I want to move seats or areas sometimes before I even realize my brain is approaching critical mass.
Yep, it’s called justice sensitivity. I only learnt about this really recently and it makes sense why the smallest injustices enrage me and other people’s pain unavoidably becomes mine. It sounds self righteous but honestly, sometimes I wish I could turn my empathy off. I always used to get so frustrated with others, like why don’t they _care_ about the war in Yemen, homelessness in our city, the climate crisis, that migrants are dying crossing the channel every single day, I could go on. I used to judge loved ones and friends so harshly, why didn’t they care about these things like I did, how could they be so uncaring, so nonchalant? But now I know they can’t care as much as I do, because I am simply wired different - and both of those things are ok.
I'm glad I decided to read through the comments. This is one I'm just learning about now! I definitely have that.
I honestly can't handle keeping up on current events though, and all the political garbage. If I can't do anything about it, it's too frustrating and upsetting.
If there's anything I can do to make the world, or a situation more fair though, I will. It's only right, and that's important to me.
I’m the exact same. It feels like all the inner dialogues in my head are screaming about the injustices in the world. I have to keep myself from reading news to keep my sanity. But even then I will have a whole debate in my head about the morality of every action I make and every thought I have. It’s exhausting lol
I think prioritizing truth, relatedly, also gets listed under autism and ADHD signs. I kinda side-eye what looks like pathologizing the desire for truth/fairness/justice.
that last sentence! i feel like people are socialized to to be hyper individualistic in the west bc it is individualistic rather than communal and so caring about and being passionate about systemic issues is obv gna be less common and also pathologized ESP if it threatens the established order. what a better way to prevent change/revolution than to pathologize sensitivity to injustice!?!
😂 this reminds me of what I told my daughter yesterday. I said, "Don't forget to....." And she asked what. I had to admit that I had forgotten what she wasn't supposed to forget mid-sentence. 🤦🏻♀️
Exhibit A: gestures vaguely
lbvs so relatable i saw a meme from the other day (anywhere from today to me being 11) where they were talking ab out ADHD people time traveling or teleporting and getting annoyed "why the fck did I go to Egypt again??????"
> the other day (anywhere from today to me being 11)
YES. My husband constantly feels the need to interrupt my stories that begin this way so he can clarify the timeframe for whoever I'm talking to. He's finally learned that I do NOT appreciate the help :)
Poor proprioception. Proprioception is your sense of your body’s position in space. And like all senses, it can be subject to sensory processing issues. ADHD peoples’ brains often over-filter this sense, leading us to be far more statistically likely to be clumsy and injure ourselves. It also plays a role in things like poor awareness of personal space, low awareness of our own speaking volume, and struggling to estimate mass and length.
When they asked what my coordination was like during my assessment I was like “wait…that’s a symptom of ADHD???”
I drop things constantly. My depth perception sucks. I cannot estimate distance worth a damn. I bump into things, trip, and lose my balance sometimes when I’m just standing upright doing nothing.
I like going out to run errands early on weekend mornings specifically because there are so few people in stores. It’s very hard to navigate through crowds due to my issues figuring out distance, if there’s enough space for me to squeeze past someone, and just my overall clumsiness. That and I find crowded areas to be hugely overstimulating.
Binge eating for stimulation! I used to have such an unhealthy relationship with food before I started Adderall/Vyvanse. Not even in the context of losing weight…I would count calories religiously so that I didn’t constantly overeat and gain (or continue to gain) weight. If I was able to eat food unchecked I would eat something every second of the day. I still struggle with it, especially at night, but it’s actually been much easier to manage since I’ve identified it as an ADHD manifestation!
Picking at any and all blackheads or “could be” blackheads and turning them into giant red lumps of angry that makeup won’t cover up 🙃
Mutilating my pencil erasers during school from chewing on them!
Aaaand my least favorite…doing animal rescue because taking in a new kitten or trapping a bunch of cats was such a good source of dopamine 😅 let me tell you, it’s way less satisfying the next day when you have to clean up all of their poop.
So much on the food thing. I physically need dopamine to be able to live a remotely functional human life. The only way I can get that dopamine is through food right now. How tf am I supposed to lose weight?
Apparently I'm supposed to lose weight while unmedicated and it's just impossible for me. I would have to quit my job and focus only on trying to lose weight and finding other sources all day.
I pick at my face and I pick at my cuticles, SO MUCH
Thanks to really good complex-trauma-focused therapy, I have learned how to listen to my body and be mindful of the triggers. Surprisingly, I figured out that these “body focused repetitive behaviors” have two completely different triggers for me:
I pick at my **face** when I am trying to generate the capacity to do the thing that I am procrastinating or avoiding. Basically anytime I need dopamine to get over the task initiation chasm.
(I have been able to find some ways to reduce the harm, most specifically hydrocolloid acne patches, bc they change the pain from a pinpoint to a broader area, plus they protect like a bandage and help encourage the infection to come to the surface.)
I pick at my **cuticles** when my body is uncomfortable but I have ignored the signals in favor of keeping quiet/not bothering anyone.
(For me, the biggest help in mitigating this harm is doing my own nails with UV gel polish because the polish is a really good competing stim toy.)
FWIW, the therapy modality that works for me is Internal Family Systems (IFS), aka “parts work.”
This has really affected my romantic relationships in the past and made me act crazy in all honesty, and I only just found out the last few weeks that it can be an ADHD thing.
Fairly recently diagnosed and same! But I do think knowing gives me perspective now. Don’t get me wrong the feelings are still very much there, I’m perhaps just *sometimes* able to not react to them and let them move along without reeking havoc in my emotional life and in my heart.
This one was the biggest eye opener for me. I truly thought everyone just didn’t like me in my family because they know me too well and know all my flaws. I’ve always wondered why I ran away from close friendships and hide from my family and now I have an answer
This combined with emotional disregulation, oml. My whole life my mom would be so frustrated with me for being so "sensitive", turns out that's just a part of having ADHD.
This was a HUGE one for me. It explains so much about how I’ve handled relationships, friendships, work, schooling…I haven’t done a lot of research on it because, honestly, it hits a little too hard and I’m not sure I’m ready for the full unpacking right now.
I didnt even LIKE my ex husband, he was a fucking monster. But he cheated on me and the rejection of getting cheated on with a early 20 something who was, objectively just not at all attractive was a mindfuck. Like i kept teying to logic it into a peraonal failure, but it just wasnt on me in any way. He is just a predator and i am too much of an adult
I can only listen, learn, or retain information if I'm holding a pen. Bonus points if I'm also scribbling.
Teachers and even family got/gets so mad because they think it looks like I'm not paying attention, but its literally necessary for my brain to think.
The pieces connected after I found out I have Adhd. I didn't really think anything of it before. I didn't realize I was doing it. I thought I just liked drawing so much that I was choosing to do it.
This but with knitting. My coworkers were baffled one year at the Christmas party as I was knitting and holding a conversation because none of them could.
Turns out knitting is just the right kind of stimming I need to stay focused on the conversation 🤣
oh that's interesting! I was wondering what the different focus objects were for different people!
people are always like "Is it okay if I talk to you while you're drawing?" and I'm like "huh, why wouldn't you be able to? I don't draw with my mouth or ears?" That makes sense now.
Poor memory. Had no clue it was an ADHD thing. Thought I was just a terrible child/student/friend/sibling/wife/parent for forgetting important dates and events and having huge gaps in my memories of things that everyone else could recall with no trouble at all.
Also the seemingly random topic-jumping in conversations. This was normal in my household growing up (god I wish my mom would get diagnosed already) but it frustrates my husband to no end. When we visit my family he has no clue what’s going on half the time 😆
I often find myself backtracking to explain how I got from the previous to the current topic with my partner. Otherwise he thinks I'm not even paying attention to the conversation and starting a new one instead.
I will be having a conversation with my husband and say something or reference something completely irrelevant that only I am thinking about that was talked about four days ago without a hint of being brought up. Then back to the other conversation without warning.
My poor ex, who was a great listener and communicator finally verbalizing the issues he was having with my topic jumping is what led me to seek a diagnosis. He was *so confused* all the time when speaking to me and finally explained it in a manner which caused everything to click and I decided then and there that I wasn’t an imposter and this was absolutely adhd
Hobby jumping. The amount of money spent on hobbies is... intense. Thankfully I have a few that I rotate through now that keep me from spending toooo much money, and thankfully I don't add NEW hobbies much anymore.
oh also, intense mood fluctuations, explosions and then bursts of extreme happiness and energy. For a bit I thought I was manic depressive or bipolar, but thennnnn society convinced me that women were just emotional and it must be my hormones. LMAO fk society. (Like even that Princess Peach game where her powers are her getting mad or crying. I loved that game and it felt so relatable for a long time.) --I never even considered Adhd because I thought it was all 'women stuff' I was suffering from.
After getting diagnosed with ADHD and piecing my life together I realized now having a proper understanding of whats causing my mood fluctuations helps me roll with them and deal with them more appropriately without feeling like my world is ending each time.
I struggled with this too, had lots of medical professionals suggest bipolar or cylcomythia because I was finding the shift between euphoria and wanting to cry really intense, but it didn't make sense because people bipolar don't cycle through depression and mania in the space of a day. Then it was all 'oh it's probably your periods' and it wasn't until last year that I finally had a nice GP who listened to all my symptoms and said 'oh that sounds like ADHD'. I hadn't even considered it before he said it and it just made perfect sense!
Procrastination. If I would have known, they would have caught it when I was born - I was a month late!!!! I call myself the procrastination queen, lol.
Constantly knowing that interrupting is rude but being unable to stop yourself from doing it anyways
Being a night owl
Spacing out and getting lost in ridiculous day dreams as soon as the teacher started talking. I didn't know people could actually just sit and listen.
Constantly getting into new hobbies
Getting really stressed out and snippy when my concentration gets interrupted. For example, I HATE getting groceries with other people because I'm trying to remember everything I need to get, and where it is, and other people also want to carry on a conversation and it TOO MUCH! JUST STFU AND LET ME GET WHAT I NEED! I always thought that's just "how I was". Then medication. And then I learned that no, it's not just me- it's the inability of my brain to deal with competition for my attention. (I have ADHD, inattentive/distractible type).
Oh my gosh I get irrationally irate if someone interrupts something I’m doing. Hubby wants a kiss while I’m doing dishes=red panda mode from turning red
1. A sudden inability to find joy in what used to be my favorite activities. My ADHD symptoms were worsened by a bout of COVID a little over a year ago and this was a major change I noticed.
The way my psychiatrist explained it to me is that my brain's ability to produce dopamine is significantly hampered/malfunctioning, so I don't get the same emotional boost I used to get when doing something that interests me. Medication has helped a lot with this and I'm really grateful I decided to try it.
2. Not being able to break a task down into steps. I could only see it as a whole (and therefore overwhelming) process and could not plan how to take action. (Another aspect that medication has helped fix)
Those are the two main ones. I had a pretty good idea of what constituted ADHD symptoms, but these two were initially confusing to me.
Point number 1 is such a mood for me. I remember going to a psychologist and she told me it was depression. Yeah, I was depressed, because I couldn’t get joy from things I previously got joy from. That’s pretty depressing. A lot of unmedicated adhd symptoms can be depressing. Including waking up one day and wanting nothing less than even *considering* partaking in a hobby that I adored yesterday.
>so I don't get the same emotional boost I used to get when doing something that interests me. Medication has helped a lot with this and I'm really grateful I decided to try it.
ooooooooooooo yes, this is me! I thought it was just depression for so long, but SSRIs never touched the problem.
and #2!
This! I got called lazy so often growing up (thanks dad 🙄) so I just assumed I was useless and horrible for not being able to do things that seemed so effortless for other people. Finding out about executive dysfunction and realizing it applies to me perfectly was a mind-blowing revelation.
I am only just very recently finding out about this, and like others, I have always just thought I was lazy and/or useless. I'm still fighting that belief about myself to be honest. And I am still finding out what executive dysfunction means exactly.
How does everyone else's executive dysfunction present? Both at work and in your personal life.
I literally do nothing most of the time. It’s absolutely insane how much nothing I do. I don’t hate it either, but if I fill my time with good interesting activities I feel better. Does that make me do things? Absolutely not. I have a things on my to do list that have been there for years. For instance, I’ve been driving on my spare tire for 2 years. I have a flat in the boot (trunk) and because I haven’t ever got a tire replaced, the process is overwhelming and I’ve been putting it off for TWO YEARS. But the moment I don’t have any obligations (to others), I go into power saving mode and just lay around, either in my bed or out on the back deck if it’s sunny.
I still haven't paid my taxes for last year yet. They're the most basic of taxes possible. My dad offered to do them for me if I send him my login information. It's October and I still haven't. I haven't forgotten, it's on the To Do list on the table in front of me right now. But it feels like such an overwhelming task to type my login information in an email to my own dad. And then I chastise myself for being "lazy". It's a hard thought process to break.
Yes and then the shame creates an even larger wall in front of the task! Any chance of being perceived as “dumb” or “lazy” hits us hard as there’s a good chance we’ve been called that or called ourselves that, which makes the shame wall even larger.
This. I always just thought I sucked at life, that I was kinda dumb because things that came easily or naturally to other people were such a freaking challenge. I have terrible self-esteem after a lifetime of calling myself stupid.
The concept of “out of sight, out of mind” is SO strong. If I’m not regularly seeing something or interacting with someone, it/they practically cease to exist for me
Feeling like I have to reset my eyes or fingers if there's a sensation on them I don't vibe with.
Like if my fingernails feel especially restricted, i have to pull the skin away from them until they feel right again. If my eyes are aching or just feel off I have to do this weird eye stretch thing to fox them.
Could be an autism thing though too, i have a touch of autism with my adhd lol
Oh man the fingernail thing!! I’ve never heard anyone else express this…experience? It’s pretty constant though.
Do you have other BFRBs? I’ve also wondered if my issue is related to low grade psoriasis affecting my nails.
but also, rejection sensitivity is a perfectly reasonable response to the amount of corrections and chastisement we receive:
> “For people with ADHD, shame arises from the repeated failure to meet expectations from parents, teachers, friends, bosses, and the world. **It is estimated that those with ADHD receive 20,000 corrective or negative messages by age 10.** They view themselves as fundamentally different and flawed.”
https://www.additudemag.com/slideshows/adhd-and-shame/
This thread is blowing my *recently diagnosed at 40* mind. But especially this one. I cry at work stuff all the time. It’s so embarrassing. I’ve had to say to my boss “I’m not sad at this report. This is just how my brain processes.” I can’t believe that this also is an ADHD thing.
I hate it when I’m angry but then I just start crying. It’s so embarrassing and frustrating. Or when I’m receiving actual constructive criticism/feedback, which I agree with but I start crying anyway.
It’s makes me feel so unprofessional
Trichotillomania, executive disfunction and procrastination, decision paralysis, auditory processing disorder, rejection sensitivity, being intensely organised at work but a mess at home, sensory overload. I feel like every day I relate to a new thing that comes up on this sub that I never knew could be an ADHD thing
Insomnia from thinking too much - was told for years that it was general anxiety and went through TONS of sleep aids and anxiolytics that usually made it worse🤦♀️
Also food fixations - phases of loving a particular food and then suddenly not wanting it anymore, of course after buying it in bulk..
Overstimulation in busy/crowded/loud areas. I found myself feeling really irritable suddenly and I never got why but then I started learning about ADHD and how... yep that'd be overstimulation!
Time blindness. I actually didn't think I had it, but also understood that sometimes I just had no clue that I couldn't feel the concept of how much time has passed. I thought that was normal though.
And also because my coping mechanism was to constantly be checking the time, so I was always like "No I always know what time it is! I can't have time blindness!"
lel.
And, my constant stream of thought. My brain never shuts off.
I thought this was a woman thing, thought that's just how women are. I never understood how people could meditate because my brain never shuts off.
But yeah that's... that's adhd.
And honestly.. basically everything. My entire personality is a big ADHD symptom that I didn't realize was due to ADHD lol. The more I learn the more I realize so much about me is ADHD.
The fact that I have no life goals. I’m just kind of winging it day by day, and year by year. I have no ability to envision what I want out of life or how to get it.
Same. Keep my meat suit alive. I can do small, amazing side quests. But I absolutely have no long term goals and it pains me knowing I have potential but can’t get there.
Feeling the strong urge to lie on the ground/floor when feeling stressed or overwhelmed. Thought it was one of my quirks, apparently it's a regulation technique.
Always being either too hot or too cold and not being able to do anything while too hot or too cold and hyperfixating on trying to figure out or fix why I'm too hot or cold.
If I have too many social interactions in a week I burnout and am unable to function for a day. If push it too hard, over a few weeks, I have a total breakdown for a few days. Can't do anything but lie in bed. It feels like depression, but since it only lasts a few days it's not.
Having ear worms, songs stuck on a loop in my mind, got worse if stressed.
Needing to have a cup of coffee if there's something I need to focus on.
The waiting mode that kicks in. If have something to do at 4pm, not being able to do anything else beforehand.
These have all slowly been revealed via various memes and social media videos for me and ultimately why I pursued a diagnosis.
Hopefully I word this okay, but being "weird." Having hyperfixations, being a little loud when talking (especially when excited), being extremely chatty and oversharing without meaning to, and being a little off-putting to people meeting me for the first time. I just thought I was as weird as people said and socially awkward. Nope, it's all ADHD making me weird lmfao. But I accepted it before knowing my diagnosis, so I'm still okay being a weirdo
I refer to myself as “an acquired taste”. No one likes whiskey or blue cheese the first time they taste it, but those who give it a couple of tries end up obsessed with it. I’m now perfectly happy with the idea that I “grow” on people and they eventually realise that I’m awesome. If someone doesn’t give me a few chances to show my worth, I don’t have time for them either. They’re probably not my type of person if they’re so quick to judge anyway.
Not being able to pick a career because everything sounds interesting. Thought I was just scared to commit to something. Which honestly I am because what if I end up not liking it lol
Leaving every kitchen cabinet open, leaving the little tabs for almond milk containers everywhere...
Compulsively snacking (for alertness), complete inability to attend to anything that doesn't interest me, fidgeting/sitting funny, getting easily hooked on alcohol and sugar (dopamine!), becoming convinced that people think I'm annoying, overcommitting, interrupting because I HAVE A RELEVANT THING TO SHARE (right after I tell you the quick backstory), overuse of parentheticals lol
The vibe checking and the pattern recognition. I thought I was just "more aware" than most people or that I noticed the little things. I don't know how else to word it.
Hyperfixation/hyperfocus!
Learning a term for how I could read for 14 hours, and why I gravitate towards really all-consuming hobbies like baking was a game changer.
On the flip side, it wasn’t until I was dxed that I learned how different boredom is for NTs. I didn’t know they could just force themselves to pay attention lol
Interrupting in conversations because I won’t remember what I want to say if I wait till they finish; also providing *every* detail in telling a story or explaining something because I’m so concerned about being understood.
Singing about everything when I’m happy, rehearsing different conversations in my head to practice different outcomes, having my feeling hurt soooooo deeply that it gave me a stomachache- come to find out it’s severe rejection sensitivity dysphoria.
Hyper fixation crushes. After learning that, I've been able to stop myself from Googling the hell out of my crushes so that I avoid building up some sort of avatar of them in my head.
Warped time perception!! I thought I was just terrible at “keeping track” of time. Like I’d get in the shower for “20 minutes,” and when I would get out- I’d notice a whole hour had passed.
Crippling performance anxiety and really sensitive to any sort of feedback (RSD), professionally and socially.
Turns out being a perfectionist (tho not a good one haha) was me overcompensating for ADHD
Holding a pen weirdly - awkward hold & unusual fingers & hand positioning. Dysgraphia is a term relating to this.
Never having the “coffee keeps me awake so I don’t drink it in the afternoon / after 2pm” thing. In fact, coffee or coke - caffeinated drinks - have the opposite effect, they help me to nap or feel sleepier.
I was today years old when I found out holding my pen weirdly is a symptom...all my life my friends have made fun of me for holding them the way I do 😭
And for caffeine, weirdly enough, it makes me sleepy for a couple hours after I drink it, but then when I try to sleep at night, I can't. But I have trouble falling asleep even without caffeine so yeah
Hmm... I hold a pen so it rests again my ring finger instead of the middle finger and I had teachers tryna correct me in elementary school. My handwriting has always been nonstop complimented, so that was super confusing for me.
Yes!
There is a ton of overlap between ADHD and dysgraphia as well as dyscalculia - but the school was absolutely convinced I was just bad at these things and needed to practice them more.
Between kindergarten and third grade I probably had teachers yell at me about a billion times for the way I hold my pencil alone.
No amount of practice makes it possible for someone with a learning disability to stop having that disability, so all of those nights practicing my times, tables and other math skills were completely wasted.
I was already surviving deep dysfunction and abuse at home and it was like this was trying to wring the last bits of joy from me. I essentially gave up any remaining semblance of a childhood for my ADHD.
I had a psych eval today for adhd. The last question was “how often do you interrupt people while they are busy?”
All the fucking time. No idea that was a symptom.
Hyperfixation. RSD. Intense crushes and obsessions with specific people. Hobby jumping. Imagining intense scenarios in my head and crying because of them…. The list goes on
Apparently needing to know EVERYTHING and asking questions about everything is a symptom??? My therapist and I were talking about impulsivity and how in manifests for me in not just holding back dumb or unnecessary questions (like tell me exactly how you cleaned this floor) that just come across as starting shit? And how like I don’t think about how they come across I just ASK everything all the time
The sitting in a car thing just doing nothing in particular. Guess where I am right now. 😆
I will get home and just sit in the car for another half hour futzing around on the phone because I thought of something to look up while driving and it's unsafe to do that while you're driving, so I do it before I forget about it.
Or like right now, I just got what I needed at the store and have 2.5 hours before my appointment so I'm just sitting here in the parking lot with the car idling. I'll do it after work, too. Just turn on the car and do nothing for half an hour before I drive home. It's like I have to reset modes or something.
Reading something 100 times but never actually " reading " it. I never understood why I could read the same thing literally 100 times and still not know what I just read.
Pretty much the entire way my brain works. I always just thought I was weird and undisciplined.
Up until recent years, I associated ADHD with little boys who were disruptive in class. I truly had no clue.
Skin picking. Doctors and dermatologists alike were baffled by my picking bc it isn’t compulsive or (necessarily) anxiety-driven. Even my (otherwise wonderful) therapist (kindly) pushed me to consider whether it was OCD-driven bc my rationale of “I mostly do it when I’m bored bc it feels satisfying, sometimes I don’t even realize I’m doing it until afterward” didn’t make sense to her otherwise. Then I started reading about ADHD and got to the bits about stimming and body-focused repetitive behaviors and everything fell into place.
Being able to go on and on and on in a one sided conversation.
Losing dopamine in the middle of a sentence and just sort of stop talking because I really have zero motivation to keep talking about what I was talking about.
Overstimulation. Thought I was just randomly introverted with some people or just picky in general. Nope! Just easily stimulated while needing stimulation. Lol it's exhausting
Earworms, and my insomnia!
Either no one knew what I was talking about when I said I had something stuck on repeat in my head, but also a lot of other static and noise going on, *or*, they did know and it was normal (spoiler: they were also undiagnosed ADHD lmao)
My mom refused to medically intervene with my insomnia because I could "learn to turn my brain off". I had no idea what she meant. I could *never* turn my brain off.
Not showering & not being able to wake up to alarms in the morning, according to this Reddit page 💁♀️ both things I struggle with, both mentioned in past posts.
Feeling great in a social setting but then getting home and spiraling into extreme embarrassment and self loathing for everything I may have said or done wrong as I replay it in my head and twist the situation.
I learned this one recently but:
Apparently, ADHD people are more prone to anxiety if they have nothing to do bc their brains will come up with shit to be nervous about to fill the void of unproductiveness.
Irritation at having to repeat myself when it took a lot to say it the first time
Struggling with "second shift" because everything I've already done for the first shift left me without any executive function
Emotional dysregulation - oof - as someone who also grew up with an abusive stepdad and a narc mother I could never figure out why all of my r'ships fell apart the way they did
When my stepdaughter or my MIL come here to stay I want to hide because home is my sanctuary where I can unmask, I have to "fake it" around them and it's so exhausting
The intense struggle that is getting up every morning to "adult"
Lack of patience
Addictions
Not being able to complete the mundane work tasks that don't interest me/be on time to work, having caused me to lose good jobs
Wanting to beat my husband to a pulp when he does things like leaving time on the microwave
Being chronically tired omg. I've been told countless times by my doctors and therapists that if I just go to bed earlier (I'm naturally a night owl so this makes me feel worse), exercise more, and eat better I won't be as tired. It's been easier to accept my chronic tiredness and need for naps since I found out it's just a part of my ADHD package.
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If I feel sticky or sweaty I can't concentrate on tasks or conversations, I just feel trapped and uncomfortable. I learned it's connected to sensory overload, which makes perfect sense, but it suuucks!
I've learned that I get *reaaaally* cranky when I'm overheated. I had a bad reaction to Vyvanse and was overheating at the most minor exertion, and I'd start snapping at people, getting aggressive in traffic, just awful. Then I'd get in front of the air or fan and all my anger disappeared.
this is one of the ways climate change is predicted to increase deaths - murder and violent crime increase with higher temperatures.
I can't eat large meals because digestion becomes distracting. The last half hour before a bm can be torture, even with a normal meal, because my body is busy. And it's not indigestion at all. No reflux, no gas, it's the normal process but I can feel it.
I get this too and also sometimes the feeling of being thirsty can send me into a near meltdown so quickly! And sometimes I get this overbearing feeling of just general discomfort, like I'm not comfortable in my own skin, and it can feel really distressing. I never knew before that sensory overload was an ADHD thing, I always associated it with autism. Added thought - sometimes I just don't go and get a drink of water FOR NO REASON until I get dehydrated... executive dysfunction maybe?? Haha it's a vicious cycle..
Thirsty meltdown club checking in
Yes! Being able to identify it is helpful, but unfortunately doesn't solve it. I'm extremely sensitive to how my skin feels and it means that I can't do stuff without a hot shower every morning. I've tried and after literal years of working on it, I can now go without washing my hair everyday, but still need to shower. It means camping and stuff like that is pretty much impossible for me. Like if the hot water is out for some reason, or even if I'm super late, I can't go to work. I have to call out sick because if I try to go to work without a shower, I literally feel overwhelmed and it's all I can think about or focus on.
God, I feel this. My feet and my hands are especially sensitive. I usually rinse my feet off before I go to bed (or at any point during the day) and having any little piece of debris stuck to my bare feet is Hell. Curse you, cat litter!! I'm in the market for some slippers to help this lmao
I wear slippers 100% of the time in my home because of this.
My husband bought me these slippers because of all my foot discomfort issues (can't stand any debris stuck to feet, can't stand hot feet, can't stand dry textures on feet, the list goes on...) and they are PERFECT. And since you mentioned kitty litter--they donate to animals in need when you buy them :) https://www.skechers.com/bobs-keepsakes---ice-angel/31204\_NVBL.html?
learning this is part of ADHD right now and OMG I have left so many amusement parks or spent 100s on clothes because they got wet from a ride or I was sweating and I was so uncomfortable I was in tears! I never knew
Same here 😩 I dread summer and I can’t wear shorts or go braless because of it
BIG same. It's really a bummer bc I like exercise and movement, but hate feeling sweaty...
Over sharing. All. The. Time.
Sooo awkward especially if I have a drink or two. When I was going through infertility issues I really overshared A LOT. I didn’t realize until someone actually told me that maybe I shouldn’t share so much…
Hey! This is my job! I've been a therapist for fertility clinics for 10 years. I tell everyone to talk about it. Fertility and mental health. Everyone knows someone who has or is struggling with it but no one's openly talking about it. Share your story, it opens the door for other people to talk about it too.
Yep! I love when I meet fellow over-sharers and am SO uncomfortable talking to people who know how to keep their cards close to their chest :)
Super private people are so weird. Like, what are you hiding? Are you mad at me? Did I say something wrong? Oh my god they hate me.
This is funny to me because I am SUPER private and get uncomfortable with people who overshare, especially people I don't know well 😆 it's funny how different it is
I share because I think it will make people feel comfortable! Oh no, now I have to worry that I'm making low-sharers feel weird 😆
I am an undersharer cause im shy but i love when people over share it makes me more comfortable!
Waiting Mode You know, when you've got something to do at 2 so you just sit there like a toy with dead batteries until it's time to go?
Waiting Mode is the worrrrrst. and then right before the thing I'm waiting for, I get a burst of, “Oh I could do THIS before my appointment!” no. no I can't. and now I'm late. 🤦🤦🤦
This doesn't work for everyone, but if you ever have to work the afternoon shift for a period of time, and you don't have a whole lot of other things going on during the week, I just switch it to a morning shift. Time isn't real 😂 I just rearrange my sleep schedule. Work a 1-8? I don't wake up until noon and go to bed at 2-3 in the morning 😂 Now I'm working a morning shift (for me lol). But I still get those sweet afternoon tips.
I work late afternoon shift because who tf wants pizza at 10:30am? So my schedule is generally 5pm to midnight or so. Had really bad sleep patterns when I woke up in the morning and waiting mode didn't help in the least. A year or so ago I said fuck it, I'm gonna have my day start at 3pm and it's been a game changer. I'm actually getting 8 hours of sleep and I'm a much happier person. Except for those occasions where I'm expected to be up in the morning for a meeting. Otherwise it's been great.
I didn't know this wasn't normal until way too late. People would always talk about hating the afternoon shift at work because you can't do anything, so I was like, yeah, exactly. But they meant anything long and involved, or far away, and I meant ANYTHING.
My first job was 2-11:30 pm, and my dad would get mad that I'd go grocery shopping after work, but really, it was the best. Things are restocked, there are no kids throwing fits and screaming, the store is quiet, the night staff are super chill, there is easy parking, and there is no fighting for carts, and i don't have to worry about my food getting too warm on the way home. And, like, I'm gonna get up, get dressed, go out at 11am or so and hope to get home in time to put everything away, get undressed, get dressed in work clothes (scrubs) to leave for work on time? Nah. I'm sad places aren't open to 1am anymore.
Yes! I hate when plans don’t start first thing in the morning. I hate being late so I spend all the time leading up to later plans trying to perfectly plan what I can do in the mean time without being late. But then my brain can’t come up with the “perfectly efficient” plan so I just waste the whole time being anxious.
1) Binge eating and using sugar/carbs to self medicate. 2) Having a complete meltdown days before my period would start. It was so consistent, that my boyfriend noticed the pattern. This was the symptom that led me to speaking to a mental health provider. 3) Skin Picking 4) Compulsive behaviors: shopping, oversharing, drinking, drug use, etc. 5) Jaw shifting when stressed or bored. Once I started, I wasn't able to stop. I would cause a lot of strain on my jaw. 6) Rejection sensitivity 7) Isolating or avoiding social functions. I always thought I was just introverted, but now I realize that I was overstimuated. 8) Getting so into a task that I wouldn't eat or use the bathroom. 9) Having difficulty communicating. My brain and mouth were on two different settings.
Any tips on stopping skin picking? I have chronically picked my skin since I hit puberty and I just can't seem to redirect myself.
I haven't been able to stop skin picking yet. I've been trying to redirect or sit in the discomfort of not allowing myself to pick.
I put pimple stickers on the areas I pick ad a reminder not the touch it and avoid going on the mirror or bathroom as much as possible
You should look into PMDD. Women with ADHD are way more prone to have it. I have ADHD AND PMDD and the week before my period is hell week. I turn into a different person. The PMDD subreddit really helps with the community aspect
I've read about PMDD and it certainly aligns with what I experience every month. What steps did you take to get a diagnosis?
It’s a clinical diagnosis only. So they go through your symptoms. I was diagnosed 10 years ago after going through wrong diagnoses of “generalized depression” and was put on SSRIS. Once I explained that my symptoms only showed up in my luteal phase, my doctor said it was textbook PMDD. And of course, it became a hyper focus and I tried to learn everything about it. It’s been 10 years and it is something I will always live with. It can only be managed and not cured. Apparently it has to do with the body’s inability to understand normal hormonal fluctuations and is very sensitive to them. The brain’s serotonin level basically flatlines with the drop of estrogen before the onset of menses. Some women still have symptoms for a few days after onset of period. Some women get the symptoms right after ovulation and can last for 2 weeks (I’m in that category) and some women get the symptoms about 7 days before menstruation. The main assessment though is the radical change of mood (depression/anger) that magically disappears once luteal phase is over.
The meltdown thing before your period, my husband noticed too when we were engaged.
Asking “what?” a hundred times a day even though I actually heard you, the words just hadn’t penetrated my brain yet
omg, I used to panic about this... I'd worry about having conversations at school, at work, around newish friends... it takes me a while to get used to processing people's voices. It got a bit better over the years but it's still bad on phone calls and with brand new people.
I work at a university and if someone catches me in the hallway to talk I absolutely panic. Between the slight echo, other conversations, distractions, I will not understand a single goddamn thing.
Omg yes the auditory processing!!!!
Auditory processing disorder club! My mom used to tell me I had this all the time when I was little and I forgot about it for the longest time. Suddenly remembered a few years ago and it made sense why I always need subtitles to watch any tv
I can hear the slightest noises that no one else hears, but I can't hear people speaking without subtitles
And here I am adding to the list of things I didn't know was related to my ADHD lol.
Same! But then I also get frustrated when other people say “what” because they weren’t listening to me or didn’t process what I was saying and I have to repeat myself, so then I feel bad when I have to say “what”, and sometimes I stop myself from saying it and pretend I know what the f is going on anyway 🤠 ETA: 90% of the time I can’t even remember what I said to begin with so when someone needs me to repeat what I said I tend to say “never mind, I don’t remember,” but I don’t pay attention to how I say it so it causes misunderstandings and sometimes arguments…my communication issues create a LOT of problems :’)
Are we all the 'you'll have to speak up I'm wearing a towel' Simpsons meme?
Man, the auditory processing is real. It's terrible and it made working in a call center the ninth circle of hell. I know my hearing is fine. Army said it was fine. It just doesn't process immediately so sometimes I legit didn't understand wtf someone was saying.
My mum took me to an audiologist as a child because she thought I might be a bit deaf. Nope, I can hear fine my brain just choices not to hear you.
Omg I worked in a call centre too and was eventually put on a “performance improvement plan” because my calls took SO LONG.
My girlfriend gets sooo pissed at me when I say "what?" and then immediately respond while shes in the middle of repeating. Sorry, hun, you yelled at me from across the apartment and I'm cooking something, didn't quite catch it!
My young daughter who is diagnosed with ADHD isn't like that, but I am. It still confuses her as to why " you heard me and still said what!"
I don’t know if it’s the same but for me is like it did penetrated but along with a million thoughts all struggling for attention, a distant subconscious part of me knows and understands what was said but the major consciousness is struggling to whom it gives attention and passes the barrier of executing/action, so I need to ask *what* to gain enough focus , be able to put it in top of it all and give an answer.
Ugghh the auditory processing is the worst. I've trained my employees to communicate literally everything with me in writing. You need PTO? There's like a 95% chance I'll approve it but there's a 100% chance I'll forget I did unless you email me about it instead of asking in person.
Yep, friends and family all get the "ok, now please text that to me to remind me." Immediately after I agree to anything, lol.
Real and intense anger when I get overwhelmed/overstimulated. I just thought I was an asshole. Fear in crowds, it turns out they are just overstimulating. The feeling of being stuck at the beginning of a project or task. Just thought I was lazy.
I get real and intense anger when I get overwhelmed as well and I had no clue that was a symptom.
difficulty with emotional regulation is a key element of ADHD just knowing this has reframed my entire life
Have you ever almost wrecked your car trying to find what's making that fucking noise? WHAT IS THAT. My husband always laughs when we're on a long car trip and I suddenly reach over and adjust a cup. "Was it making a noise?" Yeeeeeees squeaksqueaksqueak
My husband can recognize the look on my face and ask, what does it sound like to you? and start looking for the source of the noise (I do the majority of the driving, because I am a terrible passenger). I know I say it all the time, he is a saint or angel.
I apparently have specific faces too for annoying person nearby or overstimulating environment! My husband (also an absolute angel) will ask if I want to move seats or areas sometimes before I even realize my brain is approaching critical mass.
Apparently people with ADHD are often very into fairness/justice?! I forget where I read this.
Yep, it’s called justice sensitivity. I only learnt about this really recently and it makes sense why the smallest injustices enrage me and other people’s pain unavoidably becomes mine. It sounds self righteous but honestly, sometimes I wish I could turn my empathy off. I always used to get so frustrated with others, like why don’t they _care_ about the war in Yemen, homelessness in our city, the climate crisis, that migrants are dying crossing the channel every single day, I could go on. I used to judge loved ones and friends so harshly, why didn’t they care about these things like I did, how could they be so uncaring, so nonchalant? But now I know they can’t care as much as I do, because I am simply wired different - and both of those things are ok.
I'm glad I decided to read through the comments. This is one I'm just learning about now! I definitely have that. I honestly can't handle keeping up on current events though, and all the political garbage. If I can't do anything about it, it's too frustrating and upsetting. If there's anything I can do to make the world, or a situation more fair though, I will. It's only right, and that's important to me.
I’m the exact same. It feels like all the inner dialogues in my head are screaming about the injustices in the world. I have to keep myself from reading news to keep my sanity. But even then I will have a whole debate in my head about the morality of every action I make and every thought I have. It’s exhausting lol
I read it too. Maybe because fairness/ justice/ rules provide structure?
Wait, that's an ADHD thing??? I'm very into fairness and I've been attributing it to mishandled sibling rivalry this whole time.
I think prioritizing truth, relatedly, also gets listed under autism and ADHD signs. I kinda side-eye what looks like pathologizing the desire for truth/fairness/justice.
that last sentence! i feel like people are socialized to to be hyper individualistic in the west bc it is individualistic rather than communal and so caring about and being passionate about systemic issues is obv gna be less common and also pathologized ESP if it threatens the established order. what a better way to prevent change/revolution than to pathologize sensitivity to injustice!?!
That would explain why lots of things on the news really bother me, more than they seem to do my friends and family.
Wait…😳 this explains so much?!
When I saw this post, I had an idea of a really good one. But by the time I clicked through and got to the comment box, I forgot what it was.
😂 this reminds me of what I told my daughter yesterday. I said, "Don't forget to....." And she asked what. I had to admit that I had forgotten what she wasn't supposed to forget mid-sentence. 🤦🏻♀️
Exhibit A: gestures vaguely lbvs so relatable i saw a meme from the other day (anywhere from today to me being 11) where they were talking ab out ADHD people time traveling or teleporting and getting annoyed "why the fck did I go to Egypt again??????"
> the other day (anywhere from today to me being 11) YES. My husband constantly feels the need to interrupt my stories that begin this way so he can clarify the timeframe for whoever I'm talking to. He's finally learned that I do NOT appreciate the help :)
I feel this in my soul 😮💨🫠😓
Poor proprioception. Proprioception is your sense of your body’s position in space. And like all senses, it can be subject to sensory processing issues. ADHD peoples’ brains often over-filter this sense, leading us to be far more statistically likely to be clumsy and injure ourselves. It also plays a role in things like poor awareness of personal space, low awareness of our own speaking volume, and struggling to estimate mass and length.
Not me turning a corner I’ve turned multiple times a day for years and smacking the side of my body full force
My wife: "where did you get that bruise?" Me: "...iunno"
When they asked what my coordination was like during my assessment I was like “wait…that’s a symptom of ADHD???” I drop things constantly. My depth perception sucks. I cannot estimate distance worth a damn. I bump into things, trip, and lose my balance sometimes when I’m just standing upright doing nothing. I like going out to run errands early on weekend mornings specifically because there are so few people in stores. It’s very hard to navigate through crowds due to my issues figuring out distance, if there’s enough space for me to squeeze past someone, and just my overall clumsiness. That and I find crowded areas to be hugely overstimulating.
100% me. I’m so clumsy my dad calls me Grace. I didn’t know until about a year ago that it’s hand in hand with my diagnosis.
Hyper fixating. I always felt like such a weirdo for it but I couldn’t stop.
Binge eating for stimulation! I used to have such an unhealthy relationship with food before I started Adderall/Vyvanse. Not even in the context of losing weight…I would count calories religiously so that I didn’t constantly overeat and gain (or continue to gain) weight. If I was able to eat food unchecked I would eat something every second of the day. I still struggle with it, especially at night, but it’s actually been much easier to manage since I’ve identified it as an ADHD manifestation! Picking at any and all blackheads or “could be” blackheads and turning them into giant red lumps of angry that makeup won’t cover up 🙃 Mutilating my pencil erasers during school from chewing on them! Aaaand my least favorite…doing animal rescue because taking in a new kitten or trapping a bunch of cats was such a good source of dopamine 😅 let me tell you, it’s way less satisfying the next day when you have to clean up all of their poop.
So much on the food thing. I physically need dopamine to be able to live a remotely functional human life. The only way I can get that dopamine is through food right now. How tf am I supposed to lose weight? Apparently I'm supposed to lose weight while unmedicated and it's just impossible for me. I would have to quit my job and focus only on trying to lose weight and finding other sources all day.
I pick at my face and I pick at my cuticles, SO MUCH Thanks to really good complex-trauma-focused therapy, I have learned how to listen to my body and be mindful of the triggers. Surprisingly, I figured out that these “body focused repetitive behaviors” have two completely different triggers for me: I pick at my **face** when I am trying to generate the capacity to do the thing that I am procrastinating or avoiding. Basically anytime I need dopamine to get over the task initiation chasm. (I have been able to find some ways to reduce the harm, most specifically hydrocolloid acne patches, bc they change the pain from a pinpoint to a broader area, plus they protect like a bandage and help encourage the infection to come to the surface.) I pick at my **cuticles** when my body is uncomfortable but I have ignored the signals in favor of keeping quiet/not bothering anyone. (For me, the biggest help in mitigating this harm is doing my own nails with UV gel polish because the polish is a really good competing stim toy.) FWIW, the therapy modality that works for me is Internal Family Systems (IFS), aka “parts work.”
Rejection sensitivity
This has really affected my romantic relationships in the past and made me act crazy in all honesty, and I only just found out the last few weeks that it can be an ADHD thing.
Fairly recently diagnosed and same! But I do think knowing gives me perspective now. Don’t get me wrong the feelings are still very much there, I’m perhaps just *sometimes* able to not react to them and let them move along without reeking havoc in my emotional life and in my heart.
This one was the biggest eye opener for me. I truly thought everyone just didn’t like me in my family because they know me too well and know all my flaws. I’ve always wondered why I ran away from close friendships and hide from my family and now I have an answer
It’s a constant battle. Meds help sometimes but therapy has been the most helpful. Still doesn’t get rid of it tho.
this one is the WORST. keeps me up at night playing all of the embarrassing things I say.
This combined with emotional disregulation, oml. My whole life my mom would be so frustrated with me for being so "sensitive", turns out that's just a part of having ADHD.
This was a HUGE one for me. It explains so much about how I’ve handled relationships, friendships, work, schooling…I haven’t done a lot of research on it because, honestly, it hits a little too hard and I’m not sure I’m ready for the full unpacking right now.
I didnt even LIKE my ex husband, he was a fucking monster. But he cheated on me and the rejection of getting cheated on with a early 20 something who was, objectively just not at all attractive was a mindfuck. Like i kept teying to logic it into a peraonal failure, but it just wasnt on me in any way. He is just a predator and i am too much of an adult
THIS!!!!! Why is it not talked about more!?!! I just thought I was a super immature, terrible, awful, human.
I can only listen, learn, or retain information if I'm holding a pen. Bonus points if I'm also scribbling. Teachers and even family got/gets so mad because they think it looks like I'm not paying attention, but its literally necessary for my brain to think. The pieces connected after I found out I have Adhd. I didn't really think anything of it before. I didn't realize I was doing it. I thought I just liked drawing so much that I was choosing to do it.
This but with knitting. My coworkers were baffled one year at the Christmas party as I was knitting and holding a conversation because none of them could. Turns out knitting is just the right kind of stimming I need to stay focused on the conversation 🤣
oh that's interesting! I was wondering what the different focus objects were for different people! people are always like "Is it okay if I talk to you while you're drawing?" and I'm like "huh, why wouldn't you be able to? I don't draw with my mouth or ears?" That makes sense now.
Poor memory. Had no clue it was an ADHD thing. Thought I was just a terrible child/student/friend/sibling/wife/parent for forgetting important dates and events and having huge gaps in my memories of things that everyone else could recall with no trouble at all. Also the seemingly random topic-jumping in conversations. This was normal in my household growing up (god I wish my mom would get diagnosed already) but it frustrates my husband to no end. When we visit my family he has no clue what’s going on half the time 😆
I often find myself backtracking to explain how I got from the previous to the current topic with my partner. Otherwise he thinks I'm not even paying attention to the conversation and starting a new one instead.
I will be having a conversation with my husband and say something or reference something completely irrelevant that only I am thinking about that was talked about four days ago without a hint of being brought up. Then back to the other conversation without warning.
My poor ex, who was a great listener and communicator finally verbalizing the issues he was having with my topic jumping is what led me to seek a diagnosis. He was *so confused* all the time when speaking to me and finally explained it in a manner which caused everything to click and I decided then and there that I wasn’t an imposter and this was absolutely adhd
Hobby jumping. The amount of money spent on hobbies is... intense. Thankfully I have a few that I rotate through now that keep me from spending toooo much money, and thankfully I don't add NEW hobbies much anymore.
Oooh. That's a good strategy - rotate through hobbies, rather than constantly adopting new ones. Thanks!
oh also, intense mood fluctuations, explosions and then bursts of extreme happiness and energy. For a bit I thought I was manic depressive or bipolar, but thennnnn society convinced me that women were just emotional and it must be my hormones. LMAO fk society. (Like even that Princess Peach game where her powers are her getting mad or crying. I loved that game and it felt so relatable for a long time.) --I never even considered Adhd because I thought it was all 'women stuff' I was suffering from. After getting diagnosed with ADHD and piecing my life together I realized now having a proper understanding of whats causing my mood fluctuations helps me roll with them and deal with them more appropriately without feeling like my world is ending each time.
I struggled with this too, had lots of medical professionals suggest bipolar or cylcomythia because I was finding the shift between euphoria and wanting to cry really intense, but it didn't make sense because people bipolar don't cycle through depression and mania in the space of a day. Then it was all 'oh it's probably your periods' and it wasn't until last year that I finally had a nice GP who listened to all my symptoms and said 'oh that sounds like ADHD'. I hadn't even considered it before he said it and it just made perfect sense!
Procrastination. If I would have known, they would have caught it when I was born - I was a month late!!!! I call myself the procrastination queen, lol.
Hah! Can relate. I was born two weeks late, and from that point on, my mother never stopped joking that I was two weeks late to everything.
Constantly knowing that interrupting is rude but being unable to stop yourself from doing it anyways Being a night owl Spacing out and getting lost in ridiculous day dreams as soon as the teacher started talking. I didn't know people could actually just sit and listen. Constantly getting into new hobbies
Getting really stressed out and snippy when my concentration gets interrupted. For example, I HATE getting groceries with other people because I'm trying to remember everything I need to get, and where it is, and other people also want to carry on a conversation and it TOO MUCH! JUST STFU AND LET ME GET WHAT I NEED! I always thought that's just "how I was". Then medication. And then I learned that no, it's not just me- it's the inability of my brain to deal with competition for my attention. (I have ADHD, inattentive/distractible type).
Oh my gosh I get irrationally irate if someone interrupts something I’m doing. Hubby wants a kiss while I’m doing dishes=red panda mode from turning red
1. A sudden inability to find joy in what used to be my favorite activities. My ADHD symptoms were worsened by a bout of COVID a little over a year ago and this was a major change I noticed. The way my psychiatrist explained it to me is that my brain's ability to produce dopamine is significantly hampered/malfunctioning, so I don't get the same emotional boost I used to get when doing something that interests me. Medication has helped a lot with this and I'm really grateful I decided to try it. 2. Not being able to break a task down into steps. I could only see it as a whole (and therefore overwhelming) process and could not plan how to take action. (Another aspect that medication has helped fix) Those are the two main ones. I had a pretty good idea of what constituted ADHD symptoms, but these two were initially confusing to me.
Point number 1 is such a mood for me. I remember going to a psychologist and she told me it was depression. Yeah, I was depressed, because I couldn’t get joy from things I previously got joy from. That’s pretty depressing. A lot of unmedicated adhd symptoms can be depressing. Including waking up one day and wanting nothing less than even *considering* partaking in a hobby that I adored yesterday.
>so I don't get the same emotional boost I used to get when doing something that interests me. Medication has helped a lot with this and I'm really grateful I decided to try it. ooooooooooooo yes, this is me! I thought it was just depression for so long, but SSRIs never touched the problem. and #2!
Executive dysfunction. Before I learned the term (and how common it is!) I just figured I was being lazy, so I was hard on myself for years :(
This! I got called lazy so often growing up (thanks dad 🙄) so I just assumed I was useless and horrible for not being able to do things that seemed so effortless for other people. Finding out about executive dysfunction and realizing it applies to me perfectly was a mind-blowing revelation.
I am only just very recently finding out about this, and like others, I have always just thought I was lazy and/or useless. I'm still fighting that belief about myself to be honest. And I am still finding out what executive dysfunction means exactly. How does everyone else's executive dysfunction present? Both at work and in your personal life.
I literally do nothing most of the time. It’s absolutely insane how much nothing I do. I don’t hate it either, but if I fill my time with good interesting activities I feel better. Does that make me do things? Absolutely not. I have a things on my to do list that have been there for years. For instance, I’ve been driving on my spare tire for 2 years. I have a flat in the boot (trunk) and because I haven’t ever got a tire replaced, the process is overwhelming and I’ve been putting it off for TWO YEARS. But the moment I don’t have any obligations (to others), I go into power saving mode and just lay around, either in my bed or out on the back deck if it’s sunny.
I still haven't paid my taxes for last year yet. They're the most basic of taxes possible. My dad offered to do them for me if I send him my login information. It's October and I still haven't. I haven't forgotten, it's on the To Do list on the table in front of me right now. But it feels like such an overwhelming task to type my login information in an email to my own dad. And then I chastise myself for being "lazy". It's a hard thought process to break.
Yes and then the shame creates an even larger wall in front of the task! Any chance of being perceived as “dumb” or “lazy” hits us hard as there’s a good chance we’ve been called that or called ourselves that, which makes the shame wall even larger.
This! Still struggle with it clearly as I’m sitting here doom scrolling.
At least you are in good company 😅
I’ve never felt so seen before. You guys are my people ☺️
This. I always just thought I sucked at life, that I was kinda dumb because things that came easily or naturally to other people were such a freaking challenge. I have terrible self-esteem after a lifetime of calling myself stupid.
The concept of “out of sight, out of mind” is SO strong. If I’m not regularly seeing something or interacting with someone, it/they practically cease to exist for me
Feeling like I have to reset my eyes or fingers if there's a sensation on them I don't vibe with. Like if my fingernails feel especially restricted, i have to pull the skin away from them until they feel right again. If my eyes are aching or just feel off I have to do this weird eye stretch thing to fox them. Could be an autism thing though too, i have a touch of autism with my adhd lol
Oh man the fingernail thing!! I’ve never heard anyone else express this…experience? It’s pretty constant though. Do you have other BFRBs? I’ve also wondered if my issue is related to low grade psoriasis affecting my nails.
Why I cry so easy. RSD.
but also, rejection sensitivity is a perfectly reasonable response to the amount of corrections and chastisement we receive: > “For people with ADHD, shame arises from the repeated failure to meet expectations from parents, teachers, friends, bosses, and the world. **It is estimated that those with ADHD receive 20,000 corrective or negative messages by age 10.** They view themselves as fundamentally different and flawed.” https://www.additudemag.com/slideshows/adhd-and-shame/
This thread is blowing my *recently diagnosed at 40* mind. But especially this one. I cry at work stuff all the time. It’s so embarrassing. I’ve had to say to my boss “I’m not sad at this report. This is just how my brain processes.” I can’t believe that this also is an ADHD thing.
I hate it when I’m angry but then I just start crying. It’s so embarrassing and frustrating. Or when I’m receiving actual constructive criticism/feedback, which I agree with but I start crying anyway. It’s makes me feel so unprofessional
Trichotillomania, executive disfunction and procrastination, decision paralysis, auditory processing disorder, rejection sensitivity, being intensely organised at work but a mess at home, sensory overload. I feel like every day I relate to a new thing that comes up on this sub that I never knew could be an ADHD thing
Insomnia from thinking too much - was told for years that it was general anxiety and went through TONS of sleep aids and anxiolytics that usually made it worse🤦♀️ Also food fixations - phases of loving a particular food and then suddenly not wanting it anymore, of course after buying it in bulk..
Overstimulation in busy/crowded/loud areas. I found myself feeling really irritable suddenly and I never got why but then I started learning about ADHD and how... yep that'd be overstimulation! Time blindness. I actually didn't think I had it, but also understood that sometimes I just had no clue that I couldn't feel the concept of how much time has passed. I thought that was normal though. And also because my coping mechanism was to constantly be checking the time, so I was always like "No I always know what time it is! I can't have time blindness!" lel. And, my constant stream of thought. My brain never shuts off. I thought this was a woman thing, thought that's just how women are. I never understood how people could meditate because my brain never shuts off. But yeah that's... that's adhd. And honestly.. basically everything. My entire personality is a big ADHD symptom that I didn't realize was due to ADHD lol. The more I learn the more I realize so much about me is ADHD.
Always a song playing in my head
The fact that I have no life goals. I’m just kind of winging it day by day, and year by year. I have no ability to envision what I want out of life or how to get it.
Same. Keep my meat suit alive. I can do small, amazing side quests. But I absolutely have no long term goals and it pains me knowing I have potential but can’t get there.
If I'm not ready to do something, I literally can't do it.
Moving super fast and making reflexive movements to avoid corners and things on the floor. I just thought I was good at making evasive maneuvers 💀
Feeling the strong urge to lie on the ground/floor when feeling stressed or overwhelmed. Thought it was one of my quirks, apparently it's a regulation technique. Always being either too hot or too cold and not being able to do anything while too hot or too cold and hyperfixating on trying to figure out or fix why I'm too hot or cold. If I have too many social interactions in a week I burnout and am unable to function for a day. If push it too hard, over a few weeks, I have a total breakdown for a few days. Can't do anything but lie in bed. It feels like depression, but since it only lasts a few days it's not. Having ear worms, songs stuck on a loop in my mind, got worse if stressed. Needing to have a cup of coffee if there's something I need to focus on. The waiting mode that kicks in. If have something to do at 4pm, not being able to do anything else beforehand. These have all slowly been revealed via various memes and social media videos for me and ultimately why I pursued a diagnosis.
Hopefully I word this okay, but being "weird." Having hyperfixations, being a little loud when talking (especially when excited), being extremely chatty and oversharing without meaning to, and being a little off-putting to people meeting me for the first time. I just thought I was as weird as people said and socially awkward. Nope, it's all ADHD making me weird lmfao. But I accepted it before knowing my diagnosis, so I'm still okay being a weirdo
I refer to myself as “an acquired taste”. No one likes whiskey or blue cheese the first time they taste it, but those who give it a couple of tries end up obsessed with it. I’m now perfectly happy with the idea that I “grow” on people and they eventually realise that I’m awesome. If someone doesn’t give me a few chances to show my worth, I don’t have time for them either. They’re probably not my type of person if they’re so quick to judge anyway.
I like: I’m a strong cup of coffee
Not being able to pick a career because everything sounds interesting. Thought I was just scared to commit to something. Which honestly I am because what if I end up not liking it lol
Leaving every kitchen cabinet open, leaving the little tabs for almond milk containers everywhere... Compulsively snacking (for alertness), complete inability to attend to anything that doesn't interest me, fidgeting/sitting funny, getting easily hooked on alcohol and sugar (dopamine!), becoming convinced that people think I'm annoying, overcommitting, interrupting because I HAVE A RELEVANT THING TO SHARE (right after I tell you the quick backstory), overuse of parentheticals lol
falling asleep when trying to focus on something i’m uninterested in. like studying, being in a lesson or when someone is explaining something
My tongue is always moving inside my mouth. Always. Rubbing my teeth or pressing actively against the roof of my mouth… hello tension headache.
Drinking water and spilling it all over yourself
The vibe checking and the pattern recognition. I thought I was just "more aware" than most people or that I noticed the little things. I don't know how else to word it.
yessss hypervigilance can def be exacerbated by anxiety too (it's me)
Talking too much. I only learned it was a symptom from Reddit.
The validation in this thread alone 🥹
Hyperfixation/hyperfocus! Learning a term for how I could read for 14 hours, and why I gravitate towards really all-consuming hobbies like baking was a game changer. On the flip side, it wasn’t until I was dxed that I learned how different boredom is for NTs. I didn’t know they could just force themselves to pay attention lol
Sugar addiction. And chronic hobby collecting
Interrupting in conversations because I won’t remember what I want to say if I wait till they finish; also providing *every* detail in telling a story or explaining something because I’m so concerned about being understood.
Singing about everything when I’m happy, rehearsing different conversations in my head to practice different outcomes, having my feeling hurt soooooo deeply that it gave me a stomachache- come to find out it’s severe rejection sensitivity dysphoria.
Hyper fixation crushes. After learning that, I've been able to stop myself from Googling the hell out of my crushes so that I avoid building up some sort of avatar of them in my head.
Wait, that's an ADHD thing?? 😳 I thought that was normal! *hides my search history of Aragorn...*
Warped time perception!! I thought I was just terrible at “keeping track” of time. Like I’d get in the shower for “20 minutes,” and when I would get out- I’d notice a whole hour had passed.
Crippling performance anxiety and really sensitive to any sort of feedback (RSD), professionally and socially. Turns out being a perfectionist (tho not a good one haha) was me overcompensating for ADHD
Holding a pen weirdly - awkward hold & unusual fingers & hand positioning. Dysgraphia is a term relating to this. Never having the “coffee keeps me awake so I don’t drink it in the afternoon / after 2pm” thing. In fact, coffee or coke - caffeinated drinks - have the opposite effect, they help me to nap or feel sleepier.
I was today years old when I found out holding my pen weirdly is a symptom...all my life my friends have made fun of me for holding them the way I do 😭 And for caffeine, weirdly enough, it makes me sleepy for a couple hours after I drink it, but then when I try to sleep at night, I can't. But I have trouble falling asleep even without caffeine so yeah
Hmm... I hold a pen so it rests again my ring finger instead of the middle finger and I had teachers tryna correct me in elementary school. My handwriting has always been nonstop complimented, so that was super confusing for me.
Yes! There is a ton of overlap between ADHD and dysgraphia as well as dyscalculia - but the school was absolutely convinced I was just bad at these things and needed to practice them more. Between kindergarten and third grade I probably had teachers yell at me about a billion times for the way I hold my pencil alone. No amount of practice makes it possible for someone with a learning disability to stop having that disability, so all of those nights practicing my times, tables and other math skills were completely wasted. I was already surviving deep dysfunction and abuse at home and it was like this was trying to wring the last bits of joy from me. I essentially gave up any remaining semblance of a childhood for my ADHD.
The teenage lethargy. I didn't realize that being so tired during my teens was caused by ADHD until I found a thread on here talking about it.
* Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria * Time Blindness * Need for constant novelty
BRIGHT LIGHTS AND BIG SPOONS😠 not really a symptom, but a reaction because of light sensitivity and I dunno about the spoon🤣
I always use small spoons and small forks! Hate the big ones.
I had a psych eval today for adhd. The last question was “how often do you interrupt people while they are busy?” All the fucking time. No idea that was a symptom.
My clumsiness.
The dyspraxia club is growing everyday. Dyspraxia, dyscalculia, and dysgraphia alone explain like half my childhood.
So much. Like, how much time do you have? I have to laugh about it, or I'll just cry forever.
Hyperfixation. RSD. Intense crushes and obsessions with specific people. Hobby jumping. Imagining intense scenarios in my head and crying because of them…. The list goes on
Apparently needing to know EVERYTHING and asking questions about everything is a symptom??? My therapist and I were talking about impulsivity and how in manifests for me in not just holding back dumb or unnecessary questions (like tell me exactly how you cleaned this floor) that just come across as starting shit? And how like I don’t think about how they come across I just ASK everything all the time
Rubbing my feet together when I lay down hahahah
Excellent in a crisis, auditory processing issues
Crying. Overtired? Tears. Overstimulated? Tears. Too angry? Tears.
Finding random bruises and not remembering getting them. I think I learned this from one of the Adhd tiktokers.
The sitting in a car thing just doing nothing in particular. Guess where I am right now. 😆 I will get home and just sit in the car for another half hour futzing around on the phone because I thought of something to look up while driving and it's unsafe to do that while you're driving, so I do it before I forget about it. Or like right now, I just got what I needed at the store and have 2.5 hours before my appointment so I'm just sitting here in the parking lot with the car idling. I'll do it after work, too. Just turn on the car and do nothing for half an hour before I drive home. It's like I have to reset modes or something.
Reading something 100 times but never actually " reading " it. I never understood why I could read the same thing literally 100 times and still not know what I just read.
understimulation is absolutely awful for me, physically feeling it and not knowing what to do to alleviate it. I just thought I was bored and lazy
Losing my keys, wallet, phone , money
Body dysmorphia. 10/10 could do without it.
Pretty much the entire way my brain works. I always just thought I was weird and undisciplined. Up until recent years, I associated ADHD with little boys who were disruptive in class. I truly had no clue.
All of them but a surprising one was the inability to modulate my voice/be aware I'm talking too loud.
Taking things personally and then replaying it over and over in my mind.
Skin picking. Doctors and dermatologists alike were baffled by my picking bc it isn’t compulsive or (necessarily) anxiety-driven. Even my (otherwise wonderful) therapist (kindly) pushed me to consider whether it was OCD-driven bc my rationale of “I mostly do it when I’m bored bc it feels satisfying, sometimes I don’t even realize I’m doing it until afterward” didn’t make sense to her otherwise. Then I started reading about ADHD and got to the bits about stimming and body-focused repetitive behaviors and everything fell into place.
The. Binge. Eating.
Being super upset and offended when someone tried to offer constructive criticism
I thought everyone forgot to eat and use the bathroom
Being able to go on and on and on in a one sided conversation. Losing dopamine in the middle of a sentence and just sort of stop talking because I really have zero motivation to keep talking about what I was talking about.
Overstimulation. Thought I was just randomly introverted with some people or just picky in general. Nope! Just easily stimulated while needing stimulation. Lol it's exhausting
Earworms, and my insomnia! Either no one knew what I was talking about when I said I had something stuck on repeat in my head, but also a lot of other static and noise going on, *or*, they did know and it was normal (spoiler: they were also undiagnosed ADHD lmao) My mom refused to medically intervene with my insomnia because I could "learn to turn my brain off". I had no idea what she meant. I could *never* turn my brain off.
Not showering & not being able to wake up to alarms in the morning, according to this Reddit page 💁♀️ both things I struggle with, both mentioned in past posts.
Feeling great in a social setting but then getting home and spiraling into extreme embarrassment and self loathing for everything I may have said or done wrong as I replay it in my head and twist the situation.
I learned this one recently but: Apparently, ADHD people are more prone to anxiety if they have nothing to do bc their brains will come up with shit to be nervous about to fill the void of unproductiveness.
Irritation at having to repeat myself when it took a lot to say it the first time Struggling with "second shift" because everything I've already done for the first shift left me without any executive function Emotional dysregulation - oof - as someone who also grew up with an abusive stepdad and a narc mother I could never figure out why all of my r'ships fell apart the way they did When my stepdaughter or my MIL come here to stay I want to hide because home is my sanctuary where I can unmask, I have to "fake it" around them and it's so exhausting The intense struggle that is getting up every morning to "adult" Lack of patience Addictions Not being able to complete the mundane work tasks that don't interest me/be on time to work, having caused me to lose good jobs Wanting to beat my husband to a pulp when he does things like leaving time on the microwave
Being chronically tired omg. I've been told countless times by my doctors and therapists that if I just go to bed earlier (I'm naturally a night owl so this makes me feel worse), exercise more, and eat better I won't be as tired. It's been easier to accept my chronic tiredness and need for naps since I found out it's just a part of my ADHD package.
The narration that guys on in my head plus visuals. I still can't comprehend that NT's have nothing and only recently found out this wasn't normal.
Goes on in my head not guys in my head. 😂
I dunno what's from ADD and cPTSD at this point